****************************************************************************** SHAMAN-WILLOW-BIRD-15 "Shaman Willow Bird" story series Shaman Willow Bird (conclusion) Copyright 2001-2003 by Vince Water ****************************************************************************** * "Shaman Willow Bird" 7/03 * * (part 15) * A Note to My Readers: I'm sorry for the delay in writing this concluding part. I've been busy with posting nine story parts to my popular series: "New to Love". Before reading the following text, I suggest that you go back to read "Shaman Willow Bird" from the beginning as I have done to familiarize yourself with the events that lead up to this concluding story. That will better enhance your understanding and enjoyment of it. A fire crackles in the center of this lodge. I breathe in the odor of burning wood. It's a soothing smell that reminds me of happy times: sleeping in my mother's tipi during the cold winter moons, being with Big Horn when we sat together and talked, and when I've slept in the lodges of Moss-bowl men after making love to them. A smile comes to my lips. I have a sweet boy in my arms this night. We are lying along the far wall with drums at our feet, beyond reach of the fire's glow. A folded bearskin covers us from above and below. Our bodies are sweating. Running Wolf pants for breath so I pull the shaggy hide down to our shoulders. Ah... Cool air. My arms tighten around his small nude body, joined to mine as closely as two males can be. This moment together is the lull before the storm of our sexual expression of love. A sweet pleasure from flesh but it cannot compare to us sharing our hearts, the feelings we have for each other and knowing our innermost thoughts. What a wonderful gift from our Father. Almost, we can be one being. 'I want that, Willow Bird.' I'm smiling. He knows what I've been thinking of course. I Feel this great need in Running Wolf to be with me. More than having my dick in his butt. He's feeling no pain from that, blocked by me being inside his head as I'd done for Day Rabbit when we joined our bodies this same way. 'You stuck in that boy?' Asks Running Wolf. 'Yes. His spirit is like yours to be with a man. To learn what love is.' I reveal the lesson given to that youth today at the river. How Thump also gave of himself. Running Wolf is glad, curious about that man so I fill my head with images of him. 'He is a big man. Strong!' Comments Running Wolf. 'Ah, yes. I've felt the strength bulging in his arms when he held me and the might of his big cock filling my butt. Inside Day Rabbit's too.' Images of them being together is given this boy. He reveals awe. My own involvement with Day Rabbit doesn't make him jealous and for that I am glad. He knows that he holds a very special place in my heart. 'Hold me even closer!' I squeeze Running Wolf in my arms. He backs his little butt into my groin, getting my cock very deep in him. I feel the slimy tightness of his hole. His body is much smaller than mine but we've managed to join them in mating. 'Do me, Willow Bird...' A lusty moan escapes my lips. When the boy's hand reaches back to pull over my butt, I stab into his. It feels really good! This act I'm performing makes me a man. I am more often giving my butt to others. 'I feel your joy, Willow Bird. Don't be blocking my pain. Okay? I want to feel everything that you're doing to me.' I'm swallowing past the lump in my throat, considering what he's asked. I've fucked him several times before without being in his head to block the pain. He endured it. My eyes close when I concentrate on pulling back part of my will over him. The boy groans. I'm keeping my body still until he can get used to my big size. After he takes a few deep breaths, his body relaxes. Running Wolf's asshole is clamped tight around my cock which is content to lie in there since I'm not feeling a strong urge to come out. Holding him close is enough. I nibble on his left ear, kiss his head and squeeze his slim form to show the boy how much I love him. He acknowledges my deep feelings for him through our Connection. Never has he felt such happiness! We both want this night to last forever. I reach down between the boy's legs to offer him pleasure. Running Wolf's pole isn't that long. But that's because he is young; six fingers of summers must pass before he is named a brave. He's Day Rabbit's age. Just under ten years old. I roll his silky foreskin back and forth around his stiff shaft. The youth becomes tense in my arms. Panting. I'm sharing in his thrills that join with mine from fucking his little butt. My breaths come out of me as soft moans. Being joined to his body feels good. Running Wolf's left hand has slipped under my rear flap, trying to keep a grip of my sweaty cheeks. A soft cry comes from his lips. He wants me bad. I'm pulling over his slim chest with my left hand (covered by his little hand) and increase the beat of my cock moving through him. My fingers increase their lusty beat over the boy's foreskin. I Feel his pleasure building towards explosion. It will be a dry one. I'm reminded of when I was his age and taught this common boy rite. 'Someone handled your erection for you?' Asks Running Wolf. 'Yes. A boy named Broken Bow showed me how to do it. He was thirteen and able to come out from his dick. Even though I was only nine, his hand made mine feel good. I'd handled myself a lot after his growing up rite but my dick couldn't shoot until I was twelve.' A soft giggle. 'I want you to in my butt!' 'You will get seeded by me soon. I'm enjoying being with you that feels more intense now before... I do it. We have all night to be together.' I'm surprised when Running Wolf feels a twinge of sadness. I Peer deep in his head for the reason but what he was thinking alludes me. Does the boy fear that this will be our last night together? I kiss Running Wolf's soft head. I'm trying to assure this youth that we will continue being together. Stolen moments when his father isn't around. But that isn't what he's worried about. It's something else that makes him think we won't be seeing each other again. 'We have this moment, little one. No one can take that away from us so be happy. I am. Very much do I love you, want you and need you!' 'Me too, Willow Bird.' The boy's hair rubs against my chin. I playfully mouth over its length and that has him giggling. My left hand continues to play with his boyhood. A swift up and down motion in my clenched fingers; his stiffness is felt against my palm. My cock is clenched by his anal tightness. Ah. I'm trying not to enjoy it too much least I come out. I want this sweet moment with the boy to last. Running Wolf's belly trembles when he tries holding a breath. I know the meaning of that. My quick strokes over his foreskin brings the boy to a strong climax. His pole throbs against my palm. A cry comes from his lips. I Feel his sharp male thrills he experiences as a little boy. Not the depth a man achieves from sperming but this youth can keep his erection and have it thrilled again and again. My wrist aches so I take a rest. The boy's little hand comes to mine and squeezes hard. My arms relax around him. Running Wolf likes being held close, wishing it would last for more than this night. I want that too. 'Keep holding me, Willow Bird. Really close!' I give the boy a tight squeeze. 'Don't worry. I won't let you go.' He thinks about tomorrow morning when our time together will end. Sadness fills him. 'We will have other moments together, little one. I promise!' 'Okay. I'll wait for you for when we can be together again.' I'm reminded of the war about to descend on us. Warriors with hatred in their hearts from the Spear-bearing Tribe and the Shew-owa are coming. Soon. Will any of our People survive? Running Wolf doesn't know of my fears. I've kept that hidden from him during our Connection. I return to him. Happiness from us being together helps push my concerns aside. At least for this night. The boy releases a sigh. His left hand pulls my hand down to his erection so that I can stroke it for him some more. It's become slippery with sweat. I'm able to handle it quickly, bringing him to another intense climax. My cock is squeezed. I can't hold myself back any longer! Running Wolf's little body tries turning in our bearskin. My larger body follows him until I'm on top, sliding over his sweaty back when I stab down into his butt. He wails out. The boy's asshole becomes pained by my brutal attack. He feels my cock in him, pressing into his squaw spot that intensifies his hurt; a strange thrill for the youth that gets his pole surging. Pleasure explodes in his head. My loins tingle in warning, release with a flood of my love's sperm inside him. Deeply! I'm crying out. He Shares in my male ecstasy. 'Willow Bird! I felt it...' The boy gasps for breath. 'I didn't know that a man's release was so intense.' Running Wolf reveals his astonishment. I Share in it. The boy feels my cock throbbing in his hole when my balls empty in him. He didn't realize that his butt could feel that way from getting fucked. It's similar to a girl's pleasure. I'm proud of our accomplishment. We have mated. My forehead presses down over the back of his head. Running Wolf is having trouble breathing with his face pressed in the bearskin. I turn the boy onto his right side. He lovingly grasps my arms that are tight around him. Our sweaty bodies become still. We're enjoying the afterglow of male relief after having sex. So wonderful to do that with a willing boy. Running Wolf lifts his left leg within the bearskin. He reaches down for his small balls and fingers around mine, bringing them together in a sweaty clinging of our loins. My left hand reaches down to cover his. A deep sense of completion comes to us. 'Your strength passed into me, Willow Bird while we were one.' Pride fills me. This youth felt my strong gush of sperm in him and knows it will help him grow up faster. But too, I sense the hope in him that by being one with me, a part of myself will pass into him. My spiritual essence. A small giggle. 'You will need to do me a lot more before I'll be able to get my dick squirting.' 'It still feels good to try,' I Answer. I'm reaching up to grasp the boy's erection. He lowers his leg down to allow me to masturbate him some more. It's thrilling to give a boy pleasure in this way. He's given his butt to me for my manly pleasure. Sperming is a very tiring act though. 'My little balls are empty. I can thrill my pole again and again but it doesn't get as intense as yours.' 'That is the difference between a man's pleasure and a boy's. Connected as we are, I get to enjoy your unending thrills. You share in my male explosion.' 'It felt really good! My butt felt so intense, Willow Bird. Do me again.' A deep breath fills my lungs. I rally what's left of my strength to do as the boy has asked. I'm handling his slippery pole. My swollen cock is moving through his butt yet its thrills are slow to build up to where I'll cum again. 'You can't do it?' the boy Asks. I release a tense breath. 'Not yet. Need to rest a while...' Running Wolf giggles. His little butt stops humping against my groin. My left hand relaxes over his foreskin. We listen to the crackling fire. It reminds Running Wolf of his mother, when she'd tend to it during the cold moons of winter to keep their tipi warm. He misses her a lot. 'You still have a father to look after you.' Anger surges through the boy. I'm surprised until Peering in his head for the cause of it. Stands Tall had kept him from seeing his mother during her difficult childbirth. She died from it. He'd never forgiven his father because of that. 'Running Wolf. Don't be anger with him! You've lost a mother but your father lost both his wife and their unborn child.' 'My grandmother told me that she died because of him!' I'm shocked to Hear that. 'What did she tell you?' 'My mother had become frail after my birth. He knew that! Yet his desire for another son... a better son led to her death. He should have waited to seed my mother until she was stronger. That's what my grandmother said.' An image of that old squaw is Seen in the boy's head. Ever kind to him, that woman had little love for his father. She had blamed Stands Tall for the death of her only daughter. 'That was wrong of her to say.' 'What do you mean, Willow Bird?' 'You know how the relationship between a wife's husband and her mother can be strained. Your grandmother had raised her daughter for all her life until a man took her away. It's the way of things. When your mother died, she blamed the husband and convinced you of this.' 'But it's true... What grandmother told me!' 'No, little one. You heard your grandmother's anger speaking. She couldn't handle her loss. That's why she went to the Plains to seek death. It was wrong of her for taking you along.' The boy ponders over what I've Said. His thoughts turn in another direction. 'She didn't force me to go with her, Willow Bird. I wanted to. That way, I'd join my mother in the Above. My father didn't want me for a son anyway.' Anguish squeezes my heart. 'You know that isn't so! He searched for you in the Plains to have you back. Luckily, my brother and I found you. We saved you from that grass fire. It was part of our Father's Great Plan that we meet.' 'I realize that, Willow Bird. We our connected somehow. I was meant to be your son.' 'You are more than that to me, little one. We are bound together in love that's both physical and spiritual. A father cannot be that way with his son.' Running Wolf is thinking hard. It's difficult following the twisting path his thoughts are taking. 'Do you miss your father?' the boy Asks. 'Yes. It's a deep pain in my heart that never goes away. Big Horn became my second father when I was ten and he helped raise me into manhood.' 'A monedo to you, Willow Bird. His spirit drew him to love men. Is that why you do too... because of his teachings?' 'I was born that way. Just as you were and it is nothing to be ashamed of. Your father does not.' 'But I see his shame for me in his eyes!' 'It is his guilt that you are seeing. When you don't talk or play with the other boys, he feels very bad. You remind him of that terrible night when your mother died. He doesn't know how to help you get past that pain.' I breathe in deeply. 'Running Wolf. You need to forgive your father. Please.' The boy's tense body relaxes in my arms. He releases a weary sigh, the thoughts in his head that had been going round and round come to a stop. I've given him answers that he'd been lacking. He respects my judgment. The anger in him for his father lessens some. 'Please cherish your father, Running Wolf. He's been taking care of you as best he can without a mother. He loves you. And I know that you love him so tell him. Before it's too late...' 'You are scared about the war.' 'Yes. Our enemies are coming and I fear for our People.' 'How can we stand against the many warriors of the Spear-bearing Tribe?' Asks Running Wolf. My hand creeps up to the little bundle against my chest. I pinch the sleeping acorn within. Hope fills me and it spills over to Running Wolf. He gleans the Change that I'll face so I reveal to him that the trees will stand guard over my tribe when I become One with them. 'I dreamed that, Willow Bird.' 'What?' I'm Peering deep in Running Wolf's head to know what he means. Oh. He's had a strange dream last night. I Ask him to share it with me. 'Willow Bird. It wasn't just any dream,' Running Wolf warns. 'I think it's going to happen.' I'm Feeling the boy's fear. And his sadness. 'Show me and I'll decide.' 'Okay. I was standing before a weeping willow. It made me very sad to see his mangled form so I held my hands out to comfort him. A slim leaf fell and I caught it but when I looked down at my palm, it had passed through. That leaf went inside me!' Running Wolf's head is in sunburst. A brilliant Light that is difficult to Look at. He doesn't respond to my thoughts or my voice, even when I shake him in my arms. The boy was right. His dream wasn't just that; it was a vision. I dare to Peer into Running Wolf's head again. The brilliance is fading. He still won't respond to Mind Speaking but I Sense his strong emotion. Love of such intensity had filled this boy. He woke up expecting to find me in his father's tipi but I wasn't there. That made him cry. Second Bird was there to comfort him. They made love when the boy's father was summoned away for questioning by the chiefs. 'Your brother... helped me get past my sadness,' explains Running Wolf. I'm relieved that the boy has returned to me. His head fills with images of them being together. How Second Bird's love saved this youth from utter despair in my absence. His is a frail spirit. After his mother's death, he sought to join her in the Above but didn't know how so he clung to life. Not really alive; he didn't play with the other boys, feel joy and no words came from his mouth. That concerned his father greatly. He didn't know what to do for his son and his duties as war leader often kept him away, leaving the boy with his grandmother who shared his woe. They'd lost the same person who was mother and daughter to them. That led them to taking a Death Journey into the Plains together. My brother and I saved Running Wolf from that grass fire but the boy's grandmother gladly embraced her fate. She has been reunited with her daughter in the Above. This youth remained amongst the living where he belongs. With me. A smile comes to my lips. After we met, love quickly grew between us. That brought the boy out of himself. He began talking again. I dared to hope that Running Wolf would become my son but his father's search party found us and theirs was a joyous reunion. Yet the youth still needs me. I've fought against Darkness for him that had tried to steal this boy from the Light. He will be the One. 'Is that what my dream means?' Asks Running Wolf. The image of that slim leaf passing through this boy's hand returns to me. 'I don't know. You were given a powerful vision during your sleep that needs a shaman to interpret its meaning.' 'Aren't you shaman, Willow Bird?' 'Not yet. Our Father has given me abilities but I am untrained. My shaman needs to instruct me in the sacred ways of our People, teach me how to control my gifts and interpret visions.' 'I think you are one already.' A smile comes to my lips. I've Sensed this boy's pride for me along with his love. He thinks there's nothing that I can't do. 'When are you going to be with me, Willow Bird?' Our bodies are already as close together as they can be. I've spermed him but that's not what he expects from me. 'What do you want me to do?' A flurry of ideas go round the boy's head. I've caught some of them: the completion of our bodies from sex but something even deeper than that, the utter joining of our spirits that will make us one person, sharing thoughts and the binding of our hearts. 'My dream revealed that,' Thinks Running Wolf. 'You will fall into me...' I feel my heart skip a beat. He means Sharing! That would utterly join us in thought but do I dare? 'If that will make us One,' Pleads Running Wolf. He thinks about that slim leaf falling to his hand. Going inside him. Could that be what the boy's dream means? 'I'm so lonely when you are gone! I can barely endure the passing days when you're away from me. It's a terrible hurt that feels like death! Please, Willow Bird. Share... with me.' 'My little one. I'm afraid for you if we did!' 'Why? Is Sharing scary?' 'Not bad like that but I fear what would happen to you. The change.' 'How would I become different?' the boy Asks. I think back to when it happened between Moss-stone-walker and myself. We Shared. That man's memories had filled my head and though I've avoided Living most of them, I was changed by his experiences. They became a part of me. I'm afraid that our exchange would overwhelm this youth. He'd Live all my memories. 'How can that be bad?' I squeeze Running Wolf when my arms tremble. 'If we were to Share, all my memories would become yours and the little boy you are would be no more.' 'Sharing would make me grow up all of a sudden?' 'Yes. But not as Running Wolf the man... You would become me.' I Sense the boy's desire to do just that. 'And, you would become the little boy I am?' he Asks. 'No. You are much younger than me so the few memories of yours in my head won't change me that much.' 'It's my head getting filled up that worries you.' 'Yes. All my lifetime of memories would become yours and you'd start thinking like me. You would become me. No more Running Wolf.' 'Willow Bird. If you don't Share with me, everything that you are would be lost when you... die.' 'What do you mean?' I Peer deep in the boy's head and See his dream again. He thinks I am that sad tree who has lost all of its leaves. The last one falls to his hand that he catches at my ending. 'If you go away again, not ever coming back to me, I will die! Not even your brother will be able to lift me from despair. Please, Willow Bird. Do it. I'm not afraid of what will change in me. I love you so much!' 'I love you too. That's why I'm afraid to do this with you! I've lived my life knowing that it will end. You have your own life to live. I can't take that from you.' The Connection between us is broken to prevent it from happening. It becomes very still in the lodge. I feel Running Wolf in my arms but we've become separate beings again. No mingling of thoughts or emotions between us. I've had to do it. I don't want us to Share. I feel the boy's chest heaving with sobs. He doesn't let them escape from his mouth. I'm reaching up for his wet face, wiping the tears from his eyes. Such fear in him. He doesn't want to lose me. I'm crying too. I knew that there will be a sacrifice on my part when I'm Changed into a tree so that the forest can be rallied to protect my People when war comes. I hope that it won't be permanent. I've Changed into animals and returned to myself. Fear squeezes my heart. In Running Wolf's dream, he Saw that I was dying so the Change couldn't take place and I'd remain a tree. "I will catch your last leaf, Willow Bird." My eyes shut tightly when I Feel the truth of Running Wolf's dream. My life as I've known it is going to end. Soon. "Not if you Share with me now..." the boy pleads. Running Wolf's loud voice is strained with emotion. I don't want to attract the shaman's attention so I make the Connection between us again. A flood of emotion pours into my head from the boy. It fills my heart with such anguish. 'I won't steal your life, my little one.' 'You wouldn't be, Willow Bird. I had already died when my mother...' I'm Seeing that dark place in Running Wolf's heart. My love helped shine some Light there but not enough to give him the will to keep on living. That's why he needs me. Sharing myself would give him all my memories mixed with his own. A way for us to be utterly together. But should I? 'The shaman told me that we could.' 'What?' I Ask. 'He said that we should be together. Not just with our bodies...' I remember catching a glimpse in that old man's head, something that was known by the circle of shamans. Their hopes for me. The Split Tribe shaman even told me about a vision concerning a little boy who possessed my abilities. Was he talking about Running Wolf? He said that I was too old to be the One. 'You've told me that I am the One.' 'Yes. You are going to following in my footsteps, Running Wolf. Both as shaman and leader of the Mahyee-na.' 'Then you should make that happen! I am not afraid. We can be together as I've always wanted us to be. Please!' I'm feeling the remaining resistance in me crumbling away. But another concern comes. 'Ah. I am holding secrets that I've sworn to keep for others.' 'I won't reveal them, Willow Bird. After we Share, I'll become who you are. All the oaths you've sworn will be kept because you would still keep them.' That's it, then. Running Wolf's wisdom even as a small boy convinces me that we must do this. I can go to the Forest People knowing that I've left myself in this youth to remain as Willow Bird. 'I am ready,' Thinks Running Wolf. 'Should we Share now or afterwards...' 'After what?' I catch the boy's meaning when he feels my cock in his butt. He wants us to make love some more because afterwards, he'll be all grown up in his head and not the little boy I've known. I'd be doing myself after we Share. Guilt squeezes my heart for considering such a petty thing as having sex with him before then. 'Don't feel that way! We must Share everything, Willow Bird. I like how our bodies are joined. That expresses what we're feeling in our hearts and it will be the last time that we can between you and me.' I'm feeling the urge to love him for the last time as separate beings. I press my mouth to his left ear and whisper, "You are dear to me, Running Wolf. You are proving your love for me by offering yourself utterly to me in body, heart and spirit. Only one other person ever had.' 'Smiles A Lot.' My nose pains me when tears threaten to fill my eyes. 'He is not lost. I See your hope for him inside your head, even if he has undergone that change into a Shew-owa scout. Willow Bird! If you... go away, I'll search for that man Smiles A Lot has become and give him all your love!' 'You would do that?' I'm squeezing Running Wolf so hard that he's gasping for breath. 'I swear it.' Hope swells in my heart like an over-filled water skin. This boy will carry on for me even after I am gone. He will pass my love to Smiles A Lot! We will be together again! There's an explosion in the lodge. My eyes open and I see sparks shooting in all directions. The old man cries out. He's stomping them out with a gruff voice that grows louder when he nears. I'm pulling the skin back over us but the boy's left hand shoots up, making me lose my grip of it. The shaman kneels down at our side. He can see us. "Grandfather. Could you pray unto Wah-Conda for His blessing on us?" asks Running Wolf. I'm startled by the boy's request. I look at the old man's face for his reaction but it's in shadow. The upper fold to our bearskin has been cast aside, revealing our nakedness to the old man. He must realize that our bodies are fit together in love making. "Willow Bird will pass himself to me this night," adds Running Wolf. "Like you asked, Grandfather." "Hmm. Is that so?" I swallow nervously in my throat before answering him. "Yes, Grandfather. Running Wolf and I will Share ourselves completely. Ah. More than what you are seeing..." My face is burning. "There is no shame in expressing love, Willow Bird. I am aware of your spirit and the boy shares in it. Fulfill the Yheel-ar shaman's vision. Pass yourself to Running Wolf so that he will become the One." The old man's hands lift upwards for a moment. I'm startled by his loud voice that cracks from deep emotion. Almost like a wail. He lowers them to us. The boy's left shoulder and my shoulder are gripped. Soft words are spoken. "Eht-ee omt te-heh Willow Bird ah-nee ah Running Wolf oh-eem ah ept!" I don't understand his words but know that they were spoken in the secret shaman tongue. When my shaman initiates me in our People's sacred ways, I'll try to remember what this old man has said this night and know their meaning. 'You mean, I will.' Running Wolf's thought-spoken words leave me unsettled. It's almost as if he thinks I am already dead. 'No! I didn't mean that, Willow Bird...' I give the boy a tight squeeze. The Split Tribe shaman gets to his feet and walks away. I'm peering past the drums for him. Awe fills me. That old man accepts my spirit and he wants me to be with Running Wolf this night. More than to make love. 'I am ready for that.' My arms lift the small boy until he's laying on top of me. He feels my cock sticking very deep through his butt and I relishes that sensation - our bodily connection. I'm surprised that I'm still hard. Thrills go through my cock. I massage the boy's slim chest, my fingers swirling over his nipples. They stiffen. My left hand roams down past his tummy until I'm clutching his erection. I stroke over its foreskin. A sigh comes from Running Wolf's lips. His thrills there get very intense. I'm thrilled to be fucking him again. The boy humps against me, getting my cock moving through his slippery hole even though I've kept my body relaxed. I feel his little hands pulling over my butt against the shaggy bearskin while my hand grips his right cheek to lift and lower him over my cock. His stiff pole stabs through my fingers. More quickly now. Our breath holds until... An outcry! I've Felt the boy's climax and share in it. My cock throbs deep in his hole. I'm crying out too! He shares in my manly release. "Willow Bird!" I'm gasping for breath after feeling the intensity from our last explosion. Never have I felt this good before! It's more than the joy from having sex, our spirits Touched. A brief Joining as one. Sweat runs down the sides of my body. I pull the bearskin off us and gulp in cool air. Running Wolf remains still on top of me. His thoughts are calm. I Peer into the boy's head and realize that he's passed out. My heart is racing in my chest. Not just from the pleasure of mating; I remember that brief instant when we had Joined. Our thoughts were One. We had become one spirit! Ah. It's hard to explain... The moment is gone but I'm left with the utter joy from it. Tears fill my eyes. How I long for that - our Joining! This boy was meant for me beyond a young lover, student or to become my son. I understand a part of our Father's Great Plan. I'm to live on through this youth. My arms wrap around Running Wolf. Lovingly. My need to have him becomes an ache to me. We must Share this night. A yawn springs from my lips. I am feeling very weary so my eyes close. I'll just take a brief nap. Hmm. But if I go to sleep, morning will come. Another big yawn. My body settles in the warm bearskin. I clutch the sweet boy in my arms and relent to my urge for sleep. Dreaming... A finger strides over the ground. It's joined by another finger, walking, like a pair of legs. A third finger joins the march. Then a fourth. They lift in order from the ground when taking forward steps but in different moon times. I realize that these four fingers are the same yet different. Oh. A life ending that continues in the next person. The fourth finger reaches a destination; not a place but a future perilous moon. They curl against a palm and the thumb presses against the forefinger. They form a hand. It is this hand that must prevent a terrible thing from happening. Startling images rush past me like a herd of spooked deer: a trespass into the Sacred Forest by earth diggers. Something of Power is stolen away. A clever group of white People called Sci-en-tists who are without wisdom to realize what they're about to unleash. They spark this powerful something. In only an eye blink, a terrible fire covers all lands with its fury. This pleases the Darkness-that-comes for his evil goal is attained! The end to all life. I awaken from my dream - the walking fingers. It has revealed something to me. There will be boys who will walk in my footsteps. Running Wolf is foremost. My thumb binds him to the hand that is me. He becomes One with me. Another boy, yet unborn, will become that second finger walking in step to my forefinger. Two more boys will take that walk. Some future destination will be reached. The fingers will curl (in death?) that forms my hand. One. Of wisdom to prevent a most terrible thing! A cold chill goes through me. I pull the upper half to our bearskin over us. Running Wolf stirs from sleep. My cock has since slipped from his butt. He turns over my belly and gives me a hug. "Been resting, little one?" "My butt hurts." I'm reaching down for his sweaty cheeks and massage them. My eyes close. I concentrate on Healing this boy's hurt. Power surges through my hands... Running Wolf sighs with relief. After enduring a long moment of weakness (that always happens to me after working a Healing), I press my fingers together to make a count. Two times. That's how many times I've fucked him so it's no wonder why his butt is hurting. 'Not any more, Willow Bird.' Running Wolf's thought-spoken words carry the lusty hint that he wants me inside him again. I release a sharp breath. My cock is limp. This boy has worn me out! I don't think my balls have any sperm left in them to give him. My shoulders are grasped. Running Wolf presses his face in my chest. His arms are surging, butt flexing in my hands when he stabs against me. Breaths blow from his mouth. I'm feeling his need to love me again. Love bursts in my heart for him. I lift my right hand to the boy's back in an embrace, holding him close to me. I'm kissing his soft head. He returns my affection with kisses to my breast. They tickle me. Running Wolf's small body struggles over mine. I'm often losing my grip of his sweaty cheeks, their wild humping matched by his swift stabs against my cock. It's getting hard. I'll soon do battle with this youth but doubt I can give him a wet ending blow. 'You have already conquered my butt!' A sly smile comes to my lips. 'Ah, yes. Two times I did you... Felt good!' 'And I've thrilled my pole a lot more than that,' the boy boasts. I slap his butt. 'That you did.' An intense thrill is Felt from the boy. His erection throbs strongly against me. I realize that he's reached climax. 'Again, little one?' I tease. He doesn't Answer me. I'm Peering in his head, sharing in the afterglow of his male release. 'Willow Bird. You didn't...' 'What?' I didn't cum. No. That's not what Running Wolf meant but that joy we briefly shared when our spirits Touched. He thought we had Shared. 'Do that with me now!' the boy Pleads. I pull on Running Wolf's arms until his face is over mine. My right hand cradles his head. I'm unable to see his eyes in the dark. Inner Sight allows me to See this boy. His love for me. That great need in him to be with me. Utterly. Running Wolf buries his face in my neck. My hungry mouthing finds his ear, small nose, cheek (tasting of sweat) and almost I can reach his mouth. He knows what I'm wanting to do with him. His head lifts up. I kiss the boy. His lips respond after a moment by moving against mine. Oh, it is sweet! Love bursts in our hearts for each other. We share in the good feelings we have that soar like a pair of eagles in flight to the clouds. I have to pull away to take a breath. The boy has become still above me. 'Running Wolf?' My Plea goes unanswered. He has fallen asleep. I gently rub over the boy's back while listening to the fire crackling. A soothing sound. I'm feeling the need to urinate. With much reluctance, I set the boy down over the bearskin. He remains asleep. I get to my feet, walk past the drums and make my way towards the lodge door. My quick back glance at the fire reveals the sleeping form of my shaman. He's alone. Where has the Split Tribe's shaman gone? I step out into the cold night. My arms rush around my chest for warmth. Broad Shoulder greets me when rushing past him. After taking a few staggered steps, I find a place to piss between the tipis. I'm sighing with relief. A presence is felt at my side. I'm turning with alarm until seeing that it's a boy. Too dark for me to make out his face though. "I didn't mean to scare you." "Crying Loon! You did, a little. Ah. How are you?" The boy rushes to hug me and I Sense his longing. He has missed me so. "Day Rabbit gave me your message," whispers Crying Loon. We're both looking around to see if anyone is watching us. I relax when it appears that we're alone. Oh. The boy's question is still upon me. A sly smiles comes to my lips when I Answer him, 'I'm glad. You've been teaching that youth our ways in the Mahyee-na.' "In my head, Willow Bird! I'm still amazed that you can do that. Ah, yes. I've been with Day Rabbit that way..." 'Both of you will become Guardians.' Crying Loon is unsure of what I mean so I reveal my vision to him. That when they have grown into men, boys who share our spirit will be shown how to follow the path of the Mahyee-na. 'Me?' Thinks Crying Loon. 'Yes. Both Day Rabbit and you will. Thump is my Protector. And a boy named Running Wolf will be leader of the Mahyee-na after me.' 'You are going away!' I release a sharp breath. 'War is coming. Yet the trees will protect our People after I've become One with them.' 'I don't understand, Willow Bird.' 'You will. But now is the time for a joyous reunion. Have you missed me?' The boy squeezes me hard. My left hand reaches down for his waist, pulling on his thong belt to bare him. Crying Loon reveals his excitement against me. My cock is limp. I've given all my seed to that boy who awaits me back at the shaman's lodge. 'You've been with that Split Tribe youth?' 'Yes. I, ah... am initiating him tonight.' Crying Loon reveals some jealousy. 'Not into the Mahyee-na,' I'm quick to explain. 'He is the One.' 'It is hard for me to know that, Willow Bird. I love you!' 'My heart is big enough to share with others. To those who need me. Please try to understand.' An idea comes to me. I Open myself to Crying Loon. Show him how I've loved other boys such as Day Rabbit and Running Wolf. It differs from my love for Smiles A Lot who was my mate. We stand a long while holding each other in the dark. His innermost feelings for me are revealed. They come to embarrass him because of their apparent shallowness. 'I do have a love for you, Willow Bird.' 'I know. Do not be ashamed of your lust. You are yet a boy who needs to learn how to love. Completely.' 'Am I worthy to be a Guardian?' Asks Crying Loon. 'You are. Day Rabbit looks up to you. Be with him and show him our ways.' From our Connection, I catch glimpses of what they've done in their secret place down river. It is very sweet. 'I wasn't sure if we should have...' 'You were following your heart, Crying Loon.' I won't shame the boy by adding that he's been giving into the lusty needs of his dick. 'You too, Willow Bird. I feel you Looking inside my head but your secrets are also revealed. Running Wolf has a tight little butt, eh?' I'm laughing. 'Yes. Just like Day Rabbit's. Those boys are willing to be taken for love's sake so is it wrong to enjoy them?' 'No. I am glad that you aren't mad at me for what I did with Day Rabbit.' 'Smiles... Ah. My companion and I had opened that youth to the path of what he is inside. How he longs for those of his sex. He was a witness to our strong love and wants that for himself. You initiated him. More than the butt touching rite of the Mahyee-na. He is ready. Just as you were when we first embraced love.' I gently pull my arms from Crying Loon. We face each other in the dark, in silence, and an idea comes to me. My right hand presses against the boy's heart. My other hand lowers to grasp his hard dick. "Crying Loon. I initiate you as a Guardian of the Mahyee-na. Allow your heart to judge youths and guide them in our ways. Express your love to them with your dick in unforced sexual expression. In turn, Day Rabbit will also become a Guardian. Follow Running Wolf who will be leader of the Mahyee-na." "I... accept this responsibility, Willow Bird." "That is good. When you are to be named a brave, you'll be initiated into the Mahyee-na. As a boy, you can freely seek out other boys to test them." "Oh. I understand!" I'm giving Crying Loon an embrace when tears fill my eyes. He shares in my happiness. Everything becomes clear to him. Me too. We slowly part. I spin over my feet and pull my rear flap away. This boy is in need. I've felt that in him! To my surprise, his butt presses against mine. He grasps my hands. We're performing the first rite of the Mahyee-na. I remember Big Horn's sweaty ass rubbing against mine earlier this summer when I was still just a boy. That seems like such a long time ago. 'Turn around, Running Wolf.' He lets go of my hands. My butt feels cold without his warmth against it. My backwards glance can't make the boy out. It's too dark. I spit to my fingers and bring them down to wet my hole. A slap is given to my cheeks to signal my willingness to be taken by him. "Ah. I wasn't sure what you wanted, Willow Bird." Crying Loon grasps my hips. I feel his hard dick tickling against my cheeks, its seeking stab until his knob finds my asshole. My legs spread. The boy takes in a sharp breath. He slips into me. I reach back for his butt to pull over it. A deep stab goes through my entrance. I'm feeling the boy's wild flexing under my palm. He fucks me hard. My cock stirs with life but there's no sperm left in me to spill out. Running Wolf has taken it from me. Breaths race through Crying Loon's mouth. His hands tighten around my waist when he drives himself towards completion. I'm surprised by his display of lust. I've caught glimpses of him being with Day Rabbit this afternoon. How they took turns doing each other. He felt how slippery that youth's hole was from getting spermed by Thump and me. He shot a few times into that little boy himself, I realize with a sly grin. This is how Crying Loon expresses his love for me. There's no urgent need in him to come out. He's fulfilling my need to be taken and the act makes him feel grown up, like a man. Day Rabbit looks up to him like that. Well... at least like an older brother. The boy's humping becomes too wild for me to grasp. I bend over slightly, both my hands planted on my upper legs. His body slams into mine. I'm enduring his love blows, enjoying his brutal use of my ass! My cock surges with thrills each time his knob presses into my squaw spot. It has me wailing out. "I'm going to... cum!" warns Crying Loon. I feel his dick stiffening in me. There's some pain. His fingers dig into my waist, violent thrusts into my butt that nearly push me to the ground. I plant my feet and endure his ending blows. I'm rewarded with his seed in me. "Ah!" breathes Crying Loon. The boy's hands rush up to my chest, keeping our bodies close together and connected. He keeps his dick very deep in me. I feel it throbbing after his strong release into my butt. I'm moaning with pleasure. Not from my cock but how my ass enjoys getting fucked by a boy. It's a different sensation than what a man does for me. I slowly straighten my back. Crying Loon clings to me, breathing hard after mating. "You've done me well!" I sense his manly pride from the act. My words are sweet to his ears. I'm reaching back for the boy's cheeks, pulling over them. His hard dick is felt in my hole. I feel his left hand around my cock. "You are in need, Willow Bird." I laugh. "Fucking me has given me a hard on. Your butt is safe for the moment..." Crying Loon joins me in laughing. The boy's hands loosen from my body. He slowly steps back, a thrilling pull from my wet butt. I clench my asshole to keep his cum from escaping. We face each other in the dark. He giggles for some reason. "What is it?" "I remember mistaking your brother for you." "When?" I ask. "Ah. It's a funny story! A few moons ago, I was waiting outside the shaman's lodge for you to come out. It was dark like it is now. We embraced in the woods and only after fucking him did I realize that it wasn't you!" "You've caught me this time," I tease. More giggling. "Are you sure that you aren't Second Bird?" "Oh-oh. I'd better get back across the river before Willow Bird finds out!" We both laugh. Crying Loon gives me a tight hug. His chest heaves against mine, gasping for air between laughs. Someone is approaching. We separate, rushing to find breechclout flaps over the ground. Crying Loon doesn't wait to don his. He streaks off in the dark. I fold the deerskin cloth meant to cover my butt over my belt in front. A strong hand comes to my shoulder, startling me bad. It's Thump. "I not mean to... startle you." "It's alright." "I to look for you," Thump explains. "A boy asked me to." He probably means Running Wolf. I'm struck by something. "Your voice is sounding better." "Some. Not to say many words... and utter slowly." I nod my head with understanding. Thump's hand drops down to the rear of my body. "Feels wet." The man releases a breathy laugh. "A boy from my tribe just seeded me." I get the suspicion that Thump had been watching us. Or actually, hearing Crying Loon having sex with me because it's so dark. I laugh for some reason, becoming serious when I'm glancing back at the lodge. "This night, I'm also performing as a man." Pride fills me. There's a little boy waiting for me back there. He must have become concerned at my absence and asked Thump to go look for me. I take a deep breath into my lungs. Thump walks with me to the lodge door. I'm looking around, surprised that it's not being guarded. My chief had commanded that two men watch over the shaman's lodge after he was attacked. "I stand watch," says Thump. "Ah. Did you see the shaman leave?" Thump nods his head. "He go with war leader. There." I look beyond where the man's finger points into the distance. The chief's tipi is aglow. He must be holding a late night council. A cold shiver goes through me. My body is much sweated from laying in that thick bearskin. I long to return to the warmth of Running Wolf's arms. I'm slipping past the hanging door flap. Thump joins me inside. After checking on my shaman (he's still sleeping), I hurry past the drums to look for Running Wolf. The boy springs up from the bearskin. "Thump found you! I was getting worried..." I'm glancing at Thump who rubs his nose in an obscene gesture. The boy grins, catching its meaning. He probably thinks I was having sex with this man. "Does your butt hurt, Willow Bird?" A laugh comes out of me. "No. Crying Loon is only a few summers younger than me. His dick isn't big like Thump's!" "Who is Crying Loon?" "A boy from my tribe. He will be a Guardian of the Mahyee-na." "I don't understand." "You will." Running Wolf and I exchange knowing glances. All my memories and secrets will be his after we Share. I turn to Thump. "He is my Protector." My right hand grips the man's shoulder. Running Wolf looks up at him. He reaches his right hand up to the man's broad chest and jumps a few times. Thump squats to allow the youth to hang from his shoulder when standing up again. The boy's little butt is held. 'Another wet bottom,' signs Thump. He smiles wickedly. My face burns. I step back from them with my eyes falling to the man's feet in embarrassment. "Will you be my Protector too?" asks Running Wolf. Both his hands squeeze around the man's bulging arm muscle. When Thump glances at me, I nod my head. "This man is charged to Protect me but his responsibility will turn to you after... I am gone." My eyes flare to make it a command. Thump knows about the Change that will come over me when I Join the Forest People. He doesn't yet know that I won't be returning. In a strong voice, Thump pledges: "I to Protect this boy." Running Wolf plants a kiss on the man's chest. Then his hands loosen from Thump, dropping to the ground and he rushes to lay over the bearskin on his belly. The man peers down at the naked youth. His eyes become glued to that little butt and an idea comes to me. I kneel down at the boy's side. "Running Wolf is a special youth," I explain. "A few moons ago, I found the boy wandering the Plains and returned him to his father. I've discovered that he is the One for me." 'The One?' gestures Thump. 'I overheard the Split Tribe shaman mentioning that to your war leader. What does it mean?' I realize that Thump's voice must be hurting him. "Running Wolf will follow in my footsteps. As shaman and leader of the Mahyee-na." "Willow Bird has told me that you've... instructed Day Rabbit in the ways of the Mahyee-na," says Running Wolf. His eyes give the man a pleading look. "Yes..." Thump breathes. I sense the sexual tension building between them. A smile comes to my lips. My hand slaps the boy's wet butt. "You can instruct this youth in our ways." From my Connection with Running Wolf, I know that the boy wants this. Thump glances uneasily towards the door. "It won't take long," Running Wolf whispers. He buries his face in the bearskin below him. The boy's little butt sticks up. Waiting. Thump turns to me. I nod my head for him to go ahead. The man quickly pulls the front flap from his thong belt. His mighty cock stands along his groin. If the boy were to see it, he might not be as willing to be taken by this warrior. Another glance at the doorway. I see Thump's nervousness but his lust gets the better of him. He squats over Running Wolf's legs. I pull the boy's little cheeks apart. The man's left hand points his cock down between them, his knob aiming to find entrance into the kid's butt. Running Wolf's head jerks up. I hear him groan out in pain. Thump's hands rush down to massage the boy's lower back. They soon displace my hands from the boy's aching bottom, a firm palming over his cheeks to ease their hurt. I hear Running Wolf release his breath. He lays his head back down over the bearskin and sticks his little butt up. Thump's big hands pull the boy's cheeks further apart. His cock is slowly shoved into the kid's asshole. I know that it's plenty slippery from my cum but can the man's big size fit inside? Thump lowers himself over Running Wolf's back. His folded legs straighten, squeezing the pair of thin legs between them. The boy's small body is covered by the man's. Only his head can be seen, cradled by Thump's hands. There's no escape for this youth from getting raped. My hand slips under Thump's underarm until I'm touching the boy's slim shoulder. I'm concerned for Running Wolf. A Connection is made between us. 'Are you alright?' 'Yes. Some pain, Willow Bird but I like feeling this man's weight over me!' I Sense the boy's longing to be taken. Thump's big body cover his. The man's cock is stuck deep in his butt hole. He's enduring its discomfort as best he can to achieve a greater thing. A man's love. My left hand reaches for Thump's butt. I Join him into our Connection. 'Be gentle with your stabs,' I warn the man. 'Is the boy much hurt?' Thump Sends. 'Some pain. Ask him yourself with your thoughts.' 'I Hear both of you talking!' Thinks Running Wolf. 'Let me get used to your size, Thump. Stay in me! I want you to seed me like Willow Bird has done.' My head fills with Thump's lusty images of when he fucked Day Rabbit's butt earlier today. He's amazed that boys are willing to let him do that. No guilt in this man. He has come to accept his attraction for youths. 'I feel your joy, Thump! Stick my butt good until you explode in me...' I feel the man's butt humping. His cock is moving through the little butt beneath him, enjoying its slimy tightness and heat. Running Wolf sucks in a breath. It hurts. Yet he tries hiding that from Thump so the man won't stop. My right hand slips under Running Wolf until his pole is felt against my palm. It's warm and stiff. My left hand pulls over Thump's ass, enjoying his manly motion there when he stabs down into the boy. Lust sings in the man. He's enjoying the youth's tight ass, his cock slips easily in and out because of my cum put in him earlier. Running Wolf's butt feels the uncomfortable fullness from Thump's cock. I'm not blocking his pain because I know that the boy wants to experience the man's all. 'He is big!' 'Day Rabbit felt this man's power. You can endure it.' 'Oh. He's making my butt feel intense, Willow Bird!' My eyes close when I concentrate on what the boy is Feeling. Thump's long cock is thrilling his squaw spot deep inside him. His pole stiffens against my palm. Small stabs are given me. I pull over the man's flexing butt to drive him harder into the little butt below him. He growls like a bear! The boy's high pitched whimper joins the man's lustful song, in beat to every savage stab. "Ah... ah... Ah!" Running Wolf is overwhelmed by the building sensations. He feels Thump's huge cock getting stiff in him. That makes his butt feel very intense. "It hurts too much!" the boy yelps. Thump continues to plow his little butt. I Reach into the boy's head to dull some of his pain. 'Concentrate on what the man is feeling!' Our thoughts are turning to Thump: his utter joy from stabbing, the swelling to his balls when they tingle in warning. We share in the man's sharp thrills. Him cumming! Strongly. The boy's pole throbs against my palm. I hear his high-pitched cry as he reaches climax. Both man and boy enjoy their highly pleasurable releases. They have mated. I slowly pull my hands away. They are tingling from the power that flowed between the three of us. The male joy we shared! Running Wolf is whimpering under the big man. I can't tell if that's from pain or having been overwhelmed by what we'd shared. A sly smiles comes to my lips. This little boy likes getting fucked. When my spirit shares his body, I'll offer our butt to any lusting man who wants to take it. That's how our Mahyee-na spirit directs us. To satisfy males in need. Thump releases a throaty breath. He lifts himself from the boy's back to a sitting position. I've seen his long cock pulling out. It's glistening with cum. I give the man a nod. He smiles, weakly, turning his face to Running Wolf who peers back at him with a fierce expression on his face. They have made love. A lusty joining of their bodies but a beginning has been made to join their hearts. This man will Protect my little one after I am gone. My twinge of sadness gives way to joy. I have led Thump to the path of the Mahyee-na and it has freed his spirit. He too is a lover of boys. There's no shame in that. Thump gets to his feet. I rush to join him by standing over Running Wolf. My butt backs onto the man's cock, managing to slip it through my hole. 'I am spent!' the man protests. My hands reach back to grip Thump's covered butt. 'I only want you to hold me close. Completely!' The man's big hands reluctantly come around my chest. 'Being your Protector wears me out.' A laugh comes out of me. 'You have proven yourself to be up to the task.' Thump laughs. He gives my butt a savage stab, making me moan with delight. I tighten my asshole. The man groans like a bear. He thrusts into me with an increasing beat until his cock stiffens. A powerful sensation grips his balls. He squirts. We're both surprised that he managed to do that. 'Now you're worn out, Thump.' Our heated bodies slow. I feel the man's heated breaths against my neck. He squeezes me hard in his arms. 'You are quite a man, Thump. I'm glad that you are my Protector. Give your love to boys as I have.' 'I will watch over Running Wolf.' I've Sensed this man's sadness. He knows that my path will soon part from his. 'He is the One. All that I am will be in him.' Before Thump can respond, I pull his arms from my chest and step away. His cock pulls from my butt. There are tears in my eyes. I hide them from the man when he searches the ground for his front flap. "I to go stand guard," says Thump. My right hand lifts in farewell to the man. He doesn't look back. With a weary sigh, I fall to my knees behind Running Wolf. He's still laying over his stomach. The boy doesn't stir when I pat his little butt. He's gone to sleep. I'm feeling weary. I lay down beside the boy with my feet stretching beyond his head. My head rests over his soft behind. It smells good. A sweet aroma comes from manly loins that have spilt into this youth. I'm breathing it in. My balls tighten and that sends a blood rush into my cock. I kiss over Running Wolf's wet butt. My tongue slips between them for a taste of Thump's cum. Ah! I get to my knees and position myself behind Running Wolf. My hands pull his thighs apart so that I can lick on his balls. They're covered in cum. My lips become sticky. A salty taste fills my mouth. I scoot forward, sitting over the youth's butt when my hands reach for his slim shoulders. 'Are we going to Share now?' Asks Running Wolf. The boy has awakened. 'Soon, little one. I want to love you some more.' My butt rubs over his. It's a very sensual feeling of warm slippery skin. This is the first rite of the Mahyee-na. A gesture that we are two spirited by expressing the female part of ourselves with our butts. 'I know what you mean, Willow Bird. We have a girl's opening in back that a man can stick into!' 'Yes. That is so, Running Wolf. We've both been filled with seed. You took mine and Thump's. My butt has his and Crying Loon's inside me.' The boy shares in my satisfaction from being taken by those males. An idea comes to me. I gently push cum from my hole. The boy feels it against his hole. I lower myself until my hard cock sticks between his cheeks. A few in and out stabs are given him to push it all inside. 'Go deeper in me, Willow Bird!' My breaths tremble with lust. I stick back into the boy's slimy hole until my groin hair presses against his cheeks. I'm reaching for his slim shoulders. My butt flexes when driving myself through his little butt. He backs into me each time I stab deep. Thrills are slow to build in me though. Running Wolf grasps the shaggy bearskin in his small hands above his head. He is whimpering in beat to my downwards stabs. The boy's hole is so slimy and loose. Thump's mighty cock has done that so my cock moves easily in and out without pain for this youth. My butt is paining me some. I've endured Thump's all when he fucked me. When my cheeks open (when pulling back from the boy), I feel a cooling sensation there. Cum spills out of me and runs down my balls. Its sweetness fills the air. Ah! The smell of male release and the joy from getting that inside our butts. This boy's spirit and mine are closely matched. Breaths fill my mouth. The effort to seed this boy is proving difficult so I slow my frenzied pace over his back. Sweat runs into my eyes, stinging them. My body drops fully over Running Wolf. I've no energy to continue with this fuck or have any sperm in my balls to give him. 'That's alright, Willow Bird. Just to feel your effort in loving me this way is exciting. And it makes me happy to be with you. Rest now. Ah. Not over my back, okay?' I release a weary sigh. While stuck to Running Wolf, I turn our bodies onto our right side. My stinging eyes are wiped against the boy's protruding left shoulder. He giggles. My arms wrap around this little one who is so dear to me. A precious vessel for my future. 'When will we Share?' the boy Pleads. A deep breath is taken. 'Soon. Let me rest a while then we'll be together forever more.' The boy sighs with longing. He wants this and I need to, before the upcoming battle is joined. It aches me to think about how many of our People will be rubbed out by our enemies. The trees will guard over my tribe so few will be lost. But what about this boy's People across the river? They are beyond the safety provided by the Forest Guardians on this side of the river. I'm startled awake. It's dark and for a brief moment, I've forgotten where I am. Running Wolf is squirming in my arms. I tighten my embrace of his slim form, relishing the warmth of his body close to mine. His little butt flexes against me. A sly grin comes to my lips. I reach low over the boy and find his hand pulling over his erection. He surrenders it to my hand. 'You have awakened, Willow Bird. Can we Share now?' 'We will, little one. Don't be so impatient. Morning is still far away and I want to enjoy the boy you are before...' He knows what I mean. My hand pulls over his sweaty pole, enjoying its stiffness that he stabs against my palm. We Feel its building pleasure. My cock gets hard. It easily penetrates his hole and grows long through his warm slimy butt. I'm flexing mine to drive myself towards completion. The youth wants this - my love to fill him. I'm feeling my building pleasure. How wonderful it is to have our bodies joined as our hearts and spirits soon will be. Utterly. Running Wolf is panting. His erection is feeling intense. I've learned how to play it well for him, the slow beat over his foreskin that quickens in pace when he's about to climax. He gulps in a big breath. Holds it. When his belly trembles, my fingers squeeze his shaft to make him explode. A dry one. My wet release fills his butt. We're both crying out from the sweet thrills of sex. The boy's tense body slowly relaxes in my arms. He gasps for air. My swollen cock ends its stabs in his butt after emptying my balls of seed. Our male relief is soothing. I'm tempted to fall asleep but know that our night together would too quickly turn to morning so I violently shake my head. Cool air is gulped into my lungs. I'll try to keep awake. For him. Sweat runs along my nose and into my eyes. They don't sting because I am crying, so happy to be with this boy! Running Wolf has a special place in my heart that I cannot describe in words. He's the son I've never had who will follow in my footsteps but it's more than that - a young lover who reminds me of Smiles A Lot. They both have this goodness inside them I can Feel. My left elbow brushes against the shaggy bearskin when I run the back of my hand across my eyes. More tears fill them. I'm not ashamed because what I am feeling is not weakness but the strength of our love. I clutch Running Wolf's chest, feeling his heart beating within. My inner eye Sees how much he loves me too. How he needs me. 'You need me too, Willow Bird.' 'Ah, yes. You're my little one whom I love very much. My existence will continue through you.' 'Yes. Let's Share now,' the boy Sends in a Mind Shout. I relent to his demand. As I'm feeling my male relief, there's a sensation of falling. My spirit enters Running Wolf. A golden Light too bright to Look at fills our eyes! A terrible pain. Yet the utter beauty from it; we both can't turn away from that Light. Our spirits are joining like two hands clasped together, fingers slipping around and tightening with our palms touching. All that I am, my feelings and thoughts pour into this youth. He can't withstand the flood of my being. To prevent himself from drowning, he accepts what is happening, letting his head get filled with all my memories and he Lives them. My life as the little boy I was to the man I am now. Everything that is Willow Bird. I'm given all of Running Wolf's experiences. I Live them. Our bodies remain tightly connected but a deeper bonding comes from our heads. We Share each other completely. All night long. I'm startled from sleep by a strong hand over my shoulder. "Wake up, Willow Bird!" "Is something wrong?" Those words were spoken in a high-pitched voice. I open my eyes and see Running Wolf in my arms looking up at the Split Tribe shaman. The boy had answered for me. "Your shaman is awake. I need you to help pass his words between us." I push the bearskin away. Running Wolf rushes his thin arms around me when I'm getting to my feet. From our Connection, I Sense the change in him. He's no longer the frightened little boy he was. He's been made whole. I support Running Wolf against me by holding his bottom. It's wet. A flood of memories return to me from last night. Not those Shared between us but new ones of us making love again and again. Our tight embrace. Frantic kisses when we belly rubbed, my manly release against his small loins and in his butt from fucking him earlier this morning. It's left me feeling drained. 'And I am hurting!' complains Running Wolf. 'A good pain though.' I'm staggering towards the central fire pit with the boy in my arms when I falter, falling to the ground. I've managed to turn onto my left side so he wasn't crushed by my weight. A grayness fills my eyes. I struggle to remain conscious and barely manage to do so. Little hands are massaging my chest and back. Running Wolf is laying over my right side with his knees squeezing me. I'm slowly sitting up. The boy turns himself until he's sitting over my thigh. I Sense his concern. Something is pressed against my lips. A wooden bowl filled with soup that I'm drinking down. Strength slowly returns to me but my head is still foggy from not getting enough sleep. Sharing had taken a lot out of me. 'Your weakness will pass.' I'm startled by the familiarity of his thought-spoken words in my head. I peer at Running Wolf. His eyes lock on mine. I see the little boy he is but my inner Sight Sees what he has become. Me. 'Yes. Sharing has done that, Other Self.' That's what I was thinking to call him! I'm realizing that the little boy he was is gone. The eyes staring back at me are mine; the thoughts stirring behind them are what I would be thinking if I were sitting in my lap and watching me drinking down the soup. My throat's bone bobbing between swallows. The concern about my weakness... I gasp. For a moment, I was! 'We are One but in two bodies.' I nod my head in understanding. Then my eyes close tightly in anguish. Running Wolf is gone! 'No. He is still here in both of us, Other Self.' I'm enduring a wave of dizziness. I shouldn't have closed my eyes. My head falls to the boy's shoulder, my tears wetting him there. His arms cradle me. A strong hand comes to my shoulder. I'm Sensing the shaman's concern for me. 'I... need a moment to gather myself.' The old man is startled by my thoughts in his head. He's still not used to Mind Speaking. 'I need you so that your shaman and I can speak with each other. His words are badly slurred.' I'm shaking my head in my attempt to clear it. The dizziness remains. I feel a push against my chest, the reluctant separation of Ourselves when the boy gets to his feet. I watch him go to my shaman lying by the fire pit. The Split Tribe shaman follows the youth. My head hangs to my chest. My Other Self grasps the shaman's left arm. After a moment of peering down at the old man, he turns to me with a startled look in his eyes. I know that look. It means that he doesn't possess my abilities. I'm struggling to my feet. The dizziness gets stronger so I crawl over the ground to them. The boy comes to me. His little hands wrap around my chest, face pressed into my back. 'I couldn't Mind Speak with our shaman.' There's no need to explain why that is so. Sharing passed my memories to this boy but not our Father's gifts. He realizes this as I would in his place. That dream image of the slim leaf passing into Running Wolf's hand returns to us. We realize what it foretells. "Speak to your shaman, Willow Bird." I try sitting up but that makes me dizzy so I'm laying down on my side. Running Wolf embraces me from behind. He won't let go. 'Little one! I think our Connection is too much for me. Please...' The boy's thin arms pull away but not before I Felt his anguish. He knows that it must be done. I focus my eyes on the old man lying before me. I'm starting to feel a little better. It was seeing out from two pairs of eyes and being Connected to my Other Self was overwhelming me. A groan of pain. I reach out to my shaman and Connect our thoughts. "Will Brd. Mm head hts!" His head hurts. I Feel the man's pain and Heard his full words that he couldn't speak clearly. 'Your brother... the Split Tribe shaman has come. He wants to speak with you.' I'm Sensing his astonishment that he is here. I turn to the Split Tribe shaman. My left hand reaches out for his and with some reluctance, the old man takes it. 'I am going to pass thoughts between the two of you, shaman.' There's concern in him about their secret. 'I know how our tribe came to be split.' Guilt fills the two men. 'My brother. Can you hear me?' Asks the Split Tribe shaman. 'Yes. For too long... We should have tried to resolve the old conflict!' 'Put that aside for now. Do you know what's happened to you? Your injury?' 'I was struck by an evil youth.' 'That is so. It was Tash-o-gwa of the Spear-bearing Tribe,' I add. 'He is a servant of the Darkness-that-comes.' 'Where is that Trickster, Willow Bird?' 'I think he is near. After attacking you, I Saw him return to his People and enflame them into war with ours. Warriors from the Spear-bearing Tribe joined by the Shew-owa are coming. Very soon.' Fear rises in my shaman. 'We are allied by our Split Tribe and warriors from the Moss-bowl, Tagalou and the Woodlands. Even the trees of the forest stand ready to defend us.' 'You have rallied them?' 'Yes, shaman.' I don't reveal my sacrifice that will have to be made. 'You need to know something, Willow Bird. It's very important!' My shaman opens a guarded part of his mind to me. I See a circle of old men. Their hands are held around a fire. My breath is held when I wait for him to Speak further about this. 'My brother. Willow Bird already knows about the Prophecy. He has given us the One.' 'Who?' the shaman Asks. I Answer, 'He is the son of war leader Stands Tall of the Split Tribe - Running Wolf. He is here.' I motion for the boy to come closer. He does so. I'm feeling the warmth of his body close to mine but we don't touch much to my anguish. We exchange knowing glances. The pain in our eyes! 'Does the boy have power?' the shaman Asks. 'No, brother. I do not know why.' 'He will possess our Father's gifts,' I explain, 'after I am gone.' My eyes close to hide the fear I'm feeling from knowing my death. It shames me. A small hand touches my arm. 'You will live on in me.' My fear passes. I resume our Connection between the old men that had been broken. Running Wolf has pulled his hand away. 'You have served our People well, Willow Bird. I have heard of your deeds from Iron Bow. He has a heavy heart from what was done to your... companion.' 'I have forgiven him and Catch-fish-with-arrows for what they've done.' My shaman peers up at me with pride showing in his eyes. I see awe in him too. 'You are worthy to walk in my footsteps, Willow Bird. Though you are not yet trained, I proclaim you Shaman of the Kalinlepi!' Tears fill my eyes. I'm quickly wiping them away and meet the proud stare of my shaman for me. I remember something. Deep-roots-that-whisper from the Moss-bowl Tribe had given me an elk skin robe to wear when I became shaman. 'You should not go amongst our People naked.' I glance down the front of me. My face burns. 'Wear that robe, Willow Bird. You are a shaman now. You have acted as one and the People must see the outer resemblance of your sacred duty unto them. It does not matter to me that you are thus,' while pointing at uncovered loins. 'Our Father has marked you, given you gifts to serve the Light. And I accept your spirit to love those of your sex.' I've been nodding my head. Tears fill my eyes which I quickly wipe away. 'I see the other task that's fallen to you, Willow Bird. To prevent boys of your spirit from being subverted by Darkness.' 'Yes, shaman. I am leader of the Mahyee-na and I've been... showing youths the path of Light to follow.' 'Not an easy thing for our People to accept.' An urgent concern comes to me. 'Shaman. You must know that I've chosen Running Wolf to follow in my footsteps after I am gone. He is the One, as foretold by the Yheel-ar Tribe's shaman. He will be leader of the Mahyee-na.' 'Very well. I will inform the People... Eiii!' I'm shocked from our Connection by the old man's terrible pain. His head ails him greatly. I rush back to him in thought and See the darkness that is consuming him. He will die. "Other Self!" I shout. Running Wolf's small hands grab my shoulders. We Connect. I'm drawing on both our inner strengths to pass it to the shaman to sustain his fragile life. Almost, too much of ourselves is Given the old man! I'm about to pull back my hand. 'A moment longer!' We've Heard Ring Boy's plea in our heads. My hands tighten around our shaman in spite of the violent flow of Power from us that will mean our deaths to save his. A flash of Light! The build up of Power is given intricate paths to follow in the dying shaman. I See damaged tissue removed and replaced with healthy growth, a restoration of blood flow. Balance returns. I am in awe! Our Father's marvelous crafting of a human being is revealed to me that puts to shame our clumsy tools like bows, smoking pipes, tipis and clothing. We have no idea how utterly complex yet beautiful the design our bodies are. My hands pull away. That ends our flow of Power before it was too late. My head drops like a stone to the ground. Darkness takes us both. I awaken with the strong smell of sage in my nose. Someone helps lift me to a sitting position. My eyes open. The Split Tribe shaman gives me a worried look so I smile, assuring him that I'm well. My head is clear. I feel the warmth of Father Sun shining down through the lodge's smoke hole. My Other Self is kneeling at the old man's side. My eyes fall over his nakedness. I notice my own but it doesn't shame me anymore. "How are you feeling, Willow Bird?" "We are better." Those words were spoken in a high-pitched voice. The Split Tribe shaman turns abruptly to Running Wolf then his eyes return to me. "I am well, shaman." My eyes are locked to the boy's. I See myself peering back at me and remember our Sharing. Then concern returns to me - for my shaman who had been close to death. "He is resting, Willow Bird. You've Healed him! I can find no sign of his head injury. The Power in you... is wondrous." I'm slowly nodding my head. Relief fills me. It wasn't me alone who did that. Not even my Other Self but a Presence I Felt guiding our flow of power. "The People have been told what you've done. They are filled with joy and in awe of you, Willow Bird. Come. Wear the white robe and go out amongst them." I'm helped to my feet. Running Wolf is handed the smoking clump of sage from the Split Tribe shaman who in turn is given a folded garment to present me. I reluctantly accept the robe. It unfolds from my hands to reveal its fine craftsmanship. Small rounded seashells run down the front on one side that align with stitched holes to fasten it. The cloth is of soft elk skin. Plain and without painted designs. "When your shaman initiates you in our ways, you'll adorn this robe with emblems of your medicine. The People will acknowledge you as their spiritual leader and accept your guidance." In all things? I'm asking myself. The society of the Mahyee-na must be established amongst my People to protect boys of my spirit from being taken by the Darkness-that-comes to serve as his evil servants, the Trickster. The Split Tribe shaman faces me. In his hands is a decorated pot filled with water. He gestures to clean my body. I allow his tending, my dried sweat from my arms, chest and legs are rinsed with the cool water. The old man also cleans love's sweetness from my loins and butt. I stand unmoving to his hands over me. When he finishes, I'm given his approving nod. I'm feeling refreshed. I gesture to have the pot of water and motion for Running Wolf to stand before me. The boy smiles slyly when I clean him. My cupped hands splash his nakedness and wipe his sweat away. We're both enjoying this sensual touch between us. I palm over his warm smooth skin from head to toe. He peers down at me when I'm on my knees. The pot is set on the ground. I take hold of the front and rear of him. We give each other love eyes. 'I am yours, Willow Bird.' I'm smiling. 'Yes. You are my Other Self, Running Wolf. To live on for the both of us when my end comes.' We both share a twinge of sadness. My attention focuses on my left hand, the boy's stiffness against my palm. He flexes his little butt against my right hand. Timid at first because the old man is watching us but without shame, the youth drives himself towards climax. His male performance gives me a hard dick. I see his belly trembling when a breath is held. Sharp thrills in him! The boy cries out in ecstasy that I Share in. I get to my feet and face Running Wolf. The boy jumps into my arms. We hold each other, so filled with love for ourselves that are nearly One. He is me by having all my memories and I've lived his. I know that our Father's gifts will Pass to him when the moment comes. His dream/vision Showed us how. "Eh, Willow Bird. The People are waiting," says the Split Tribe shaman. Running Wolf is gently lowered to the ground. I face the old man. He hands me a thong belt and two flaps to wear. They're quickly donned. I'm helped into a white elk skin robe. It feels soft against my skin and is of an unexpected weight. A reminder of the burdens coming to my shoulders to serve the People. "Go out amongst them, shaman." I give the Split Tribe shaman a weak grin. My head bows when passing through the lodge's covered door and I'm greeted by Broad Shoulder. His tired eyes widen to see me thus. The man smiles, almost as if in relief. Hope. That's what I see in him and when walking through camp, the People raise their hands to me in greeting with their hearts lifted. My passing chases away their sense of doom. Thump comes to walk at my right side. I acknowledge him with a grin that he returns with pride filling his eyes. It is very sweet. A crowd of People follow us to my chief's tipi. I hear their excited voices and happiness. It seems unreal. They are really praising me? Do they accept me as their shaman? I announce my name at the door. A gruff voice bids me to enter and after gesturing for Thump to wait outside, I enter my chief's tipi. Oaken Strength is sitting beside him along with Smoke-that-doesn't-lie. They're sharing a pipe between them. "Willow Bird! I was offering my farewell to your chief since we must be leaving. I'm glad that you've awakened and can receive a proper thanks from me. Ah. I'll wait for you by the corral." The Tagalou warrior gets to his feet. He raises his right hand to my chief and Oaken Strength, turns, and hastily leaves the tipi. I shrug my shoulders in dismay at these men. A gesture is given me to sit with them. "It is good to see you at last, Willow Bird." I've heard the tone in my chief's voice. Yes. I have been absent from camp since my return though my timely arrival at the river had stopped the Split Tribe from warring with us. Oaken Strength offers me the pipe. I reach out and draw smoke from it. In the next moment, I'm coughing. A boy giggles behind me. "Is that Stands Tall's son?" the chief asks. I look behind me to see Running Wolf crouched there. My hand gesture asks the boy to sit in my lap. He does so, setting his butt over my covered thigh. That draws frowns from the men. "He is my Other Self," I whisper. My eyes glare at these two men without shame and they nod, accepting the boy to our council. "Ah, Willow Bird. It is good to see you enrobed but more so, I see the brightness to your face that has replaced the sadness that was there." "Yes, my chief. I accept the responsibilities that have come to me for the People." In a lower voice, "But it will only be for a short while. I am going. This youth will carry on in my footsteps." "What is this?" asks Oaken Strength with alarm. I keep my face plain, to hide fear. "We have Seen that this will be so. When our enemies attack, I'll go to the Forest People and become one of them. In return, they will protect ours. Oaken Strength. Tell everyone not to enter the woods when this happens least they be mistaken for our enemies!" The chief gasps as if in pain. "You must do this thing?" I'm nodding. They fear for my loss even more than I am. An uneasy silence fills the tipi. "Willow Bird will live on through me," says Running Wolf. The pride in this youth! My head lowers to his and my eyes close. I'm giving into fear and woe for a moment while my face is hidden in this boy's hair, so great is my anguish at what will be happening to me! 'Don't be scared,' Sends Running Wolf. 'You won't really be gone.' 'I know that, little one. It's just that...' He acknowledges what I'm trying to say. There's no need to even think to each other since we are one in thought. It is a small comfort to know that I'll live on through him but I'm mourning my loss of first self, my body and everything that was Willow Bird. "Iron Bow will take care of your mother." I lift my head and breathe deeply. "That is good." There's concern in my chief about what that man has done to help Catch-fish-with-arrows in taking my lover across to the Split Tribe to be killed. A fear that I'll take revenge. "I have forgiven what they've done out of ignorance. In a way, Smiles A Lot had to die so that events would be set in motion for the good of our tribe. I've brought warriors from the Moss-bowl and Woodland Tribes to join us in arms. It also had me facing a trial from the Darkness-that-comes. He could not subvert me and I'm the stronger for it, a glimpse given me of his evil plans." The men make a warding off gesture when hearing me name the Evil One. "Yes. You should fear him! He subverts boys who are of my spirit to serve as Tricksters when they are shunned by the People for what they are inside. To prevent this, the Mahyee-na Society must be established to test our youths and grant them acceptance if they're two spirited so they won't be turned to evil." Oaken Strength turns to our chief. Something unspoken passes between them that leaves me with baited breath. Will they grant my request? "Hmm. This is not an easy thing you ask," says the chief. "The People don't understand why you've loved certain boys in our tribe and it goes against the natural scheme of things - man to woman to bring forth new life." I release a troubled sigh. "A love between two persons happens whether they are of the same sex or not. I've shown love to boys that has helped them understand who they are and accept themselves. My monedo freed my spirit through his love and teachings. His Spear-bearing warrior had done that for him. If certain youths are not given guidance in this, fearful of who they are or shunned by the People, the Evil One comes for them. He offers them power over others to vent their hatred, anger and frustration. They become his evil servants. The Mahyee-na Society was established by that warrior/shaman of the Spear-bearing People who came to our tribe in peace. It was he who trained my monedo's lover and that man's son..." In a mere whisper, "who the Split Tribe tortured and killed." My voice breaks up. "Those who are Mahyee-na are given a sacred task! Through love, they free troubled spirits who otherwise would be subverted by evil. The People need to know who we are. Accept us." The men gasp. Those strong words had come from Running Wolf and hearing such wisdom from a youth may reach their hearts where as my words couldn't. "You know what it means to be... Mahyee-na?" asks Oaken Strength. "Yes. It means that there is no shame in me to love those of my sex. I'm two spirited - expressing the male part of myself in front and female in back. But being Mahyee-na is more than bodily fulfillment. My heart can know love! My spirit rejoices to be myself in my eyes and hopefully, in the eyes of my tribe. Being happy, the Dark One has no chance to tempt me to his evil ways." I see how Running Wolf has captivated them with his innocent, high-pitched voice. The boy presses on. "Our Father grants some of us Gifts to fight evil. Willow Bird has been so blessed. He has Healed. He's rescued me from a Trickster who would have done very bad things to me before... killing me. You know the good Willow Bird has done for the People. Yet they don't accept the path his spirit follows. He's been made to suffer because of this! Has he acted in anger or revenge against those who have hurt him? No. Willow Bird is forgiving. You have only to ask Catch-fish-with-arrows whether this is not so?" Oaken Strength and the chief have lowered their heads as if shamed. No. I think that's from the burden this youth is passing to them - how to convince the People to accept those of the Mahyee-na. Or maybe they don't understand what the both of us have said. I don't know! I'm tempted to reach out to Connect our thoughts so they will. Ah, but no. It would be wrong to bend their wills to mine. If we can't convince these two wise men, then there's no hope to bring this truth to the rest of our People. A man calls out his name outside the door. Running Wolf shudders. That was his father who's come to take him back across the river. "Think on what Willow Bird and I have said," the boy quickly asks. "We know that your hearts are heavy from the threat of war." "Ah, come in Stands Tall!" utters the chief. The warrior enters and he goes to his son, reclaiming him. I exchange nods with this man, get up and lift my right hand to everyone in farewell. At the door, I turn to glance at Running Wolf. He gives me love eyes that I return. A cold chill runs down my spine. Is this the last time that we'll be seeing each other? I step out into the sunlight. Yet it doesn't warm my heart. There are no People waiting outside as I'd feared and for that, I am glad. Thump comes to my side. We exchange glances. He sees that I'm not up to talking. I make my way past the tipis to the corral. I've caught sight of Frozen Finger, the Moss-bowl Chief's son. He was talking with As-a-crow and a warrior from the Woodlands Tribe. Smoke-that-doesn't-lie raises his hand at my approach. I return his greeting. Gathered around him are the men he's brought from the Tagalou, their horses in hand. They are prepared to leave. "Find my son!" the war leader barks to one of his braves. A mused grin crosses my lips. I'm sure that Squirrel Tail is with a certain girl of my tribe. If that boy were only a few years older, he'd be off to honeymoon with Rain Dancer in spite of their parent's objections. Smoke-that-doesn't-lie regains a friendly composure when he faces me. My eyes are drawn to a pile of buffalo hides at the man's feet. His finger points down at them. "For returning my son to me, I give you these hides..." and points to another pile at his left, "these pots crafted from the Moss-bowl People, a pouch of tobacco and some beaded necklaces that came from a trade with the White People." The man frowns. "I had hoped to have my son here so that he can thank you himself." I'm overwhelmed by his generosity. "There's no need!" When the war leader grimaces at my words I quickly add, "For your son to thank me. He already has." Smoke-that-doesn't-lie nods. "I must leave if we're to reach the river crossing before night comes." The warrior glances up at the late noon sky. Something troubling fills his face that reminds me of what Thump's told me about their difficult journey here. "I'll Ask the trees not to trouble you on your way back." Another thought strikes me. "Be sure to pull back your roped bridge so that our enemies cannot use it to cross the river." "It will be done." Smoke-that-doesn't-like turns to Thump. "Your horse has been readied for you." I catch Thump's side glance at me. He faces his war leader with a plain face that hides his inner struggle. "I to stay with Willr Brd. Protect him!" Smoke-that-doesn't-lie is angered while his braves reveal a yearning to stay so that they could face our enemies in war and earn honor for themselves. "So be it." The war leader turns away abruptly to mount his horse. Behind Smoke-that-doesn't-lie's back, some of his braves give Thump hand gestures wishing him luck. Someone is running to us. It's a young brave holding Squirrel Tail's hand. When the boy reaches his father's horse, they exchange glances before he's lifted to sit up in front. I raise my hand to this youth in farewell. We watch the Tagalou ride into the woods. I walk along the hoofed-torn path until I'm facing a slim oak. My hands go out to him with my Plea to allow those men's unmolested passage back to the river. With a sigh, I turn to Thump. Awe fills his eyes. We're hearing the rustling of leaves and see tree branches swaying though there's no wind. Yes. My Plea is being acknowledged. Thump follows me back to the corral. Our arms fill with the gifts that Smoke-that-doesn't-lie has given me. I don't think it was to prove how much he values his son but given out of a sense of vanity for himself. We carry this burden back to my mother's tipi. She is sitting over her mat by the door, her eyes peering up at me with a grin. "These are for you, mother. Smoke-that-doesn't-lie from the Tagalou gifted me for finding his son who'd become lost in our woods." I enter the tipi and drop the buffalo hides to the floor. Thump remains outside. I'm taking the pots, pouch of tobacco and beaded necklaces from his hands and place them inside as well. Warm Hands studies my companion. Her worried eyes return to me. "This is Thump of the Tagalou. He's remained behind to... protect our tribe. And myself." "Are you hungry?" the woman asks. I'm nodding. My stomach has been rumbling but I thought it came from my nervous excitement by going about camp in a shaman's robe, receiving the adoration of our People and meeting with my chief. "No thank," answers Thump. "I eat in morning." Relief fills my mother's face. I'm noticing how well Thump is speaking. His low manly voice betrays no sense of being Mahyee-na to my mother. I recall how difficult my last meal with her had been. Smiles A Lot had eaten with us. "Come inside, my son. I've some fresh deer meet to offer you." Is Iron Bow already providing for my mother as the chief said? A pang of guilt fills me. That is a son's duty that I've neglected to perform. But, of course, I have been tending to our People. A great burden for my shoulders! I enter the tipi followed by Warm Hands. It's warm in here so I cast off my shaman's robe. I don't feel comfortable wearing it, especially before my mother. Her eyes fall to my two flaps that remind me how I've lost the lengthy breechclout she'd gifted me two hands of fingers ago. It had been lost in the river during my frantic swim to reach the Split Tribe on that terrible day. I drop to the dirt like a tipi who's poles have broken in a storm. Smiles A Lot is gone but hope fills me that I'll find him again as that Shew-owa scout his spirit has gone to. We'll be together again! The sadness deepens in me. Not as Willow Bird but changed in form like he has. Will he recognize me in the body of Running Wolf? I'm handed a wooden bowl filled with pieces of meat. I bring them to my mouth, chew, swallow and rinse it down with a mug of water. My eyes lift to mother. She's been watching me. "My son. I know how hard things have been for you..." I'm reaching out to my mother and hold her close, my tears kept inside me when anguish squeezes my heart! "Your father would have been proud." The sadness in me breaks. To hear that from my mother fills me with pride. I have acted well. Where anyone else would have had their spirit broken, mine endured in spite of the terrible trials I've faced! "Yes, my son. You are strong like the willow. Our People need this, to know that you'll protect us against the coming storm." Has she Heard my thoughts? "Iron Bow has spoken with me. He's truly sorry for what's happened to your companion. Catch-fish-with-arrows, too! I was told how you've forgiven them for that. Willow Bird? I'm very proud of you!" Tears run down my face. I squeeze mother hard in my arms and don't let go for a long while. Night has fallen when I'm stepping out of the tipi. My mother and I had a long talk. There was a lot of catching up to do when telling her what's been happening to me these past moons. I held back only those things any man would to a woman. Especially one's mother. I grin slyly to myself. Thump is seen standing wearily by the door. He comes alert. "You have been out here all this time?" I ask guiltily. "Yes. I 'mm you Protector." A tense breath blows out my mouth. "Thump. There's no need to do that." I look past him at the blazing campfires that are keeping our visitors warm. "Wouldn't you like to be with the other men? Exchange stories and such?" He gives me a sweeping hand gesture. Oh. Those warriors and braves come from other tribes and Thump still has difficulty with speaking. "My mother's neighbors will wonder about you standing here all night. If you must guard me, sit over the mat. Sleep when you need to." Thump doesn't say a word. I can't read his face in the dark but I'm sensing his hurt. Thump remains standing. Defiant. My hand grasps his huge muscled shoulder. 'I honor your need to Protect me. It just isn't necessary while I'm in camp. Those men who'd taken my lover across the river... They are sorry for doing that and I've forgiven them.' I'm sensing this man's fatigue. Yet in spite of it, he feels the need to stand guard over me. What can I do to convince him? I utter that Power Word I've heard Smiles A Lot use on Bending Arrow when we didn't want him watching his son's purification rite in the shaman's lodge. "Sleep, Thump." He slumps down against the tipi in my arms. I'm feeling a bit guilty for doing that. There didn't seem any other way to persuade Thump. Before pulling back my hands, I Send him my apology along with my love to remember upon waking. May he be given sweet dreams. I am reminded of the reason I've left my mother's side. I'm walking past the remaining tipis to the edge of camp. My front flap lifts. Ah. Relief comes to me when I wet the ground at my feet. Hmm. I'm drawn to the dark woods for some reason. My reluctant steps, one in front of the other are taking me further away from the safety of my tribe, from our warriors and braves who are preparing for battle and a People who dread its coming. The glow from campfires fade when I enter the forest. A cold wind blows, chilling me. There's the strong smell of smoke in my nostrils. Not from the campfires I've left behind! I'm Reaching out to Ask the trees about it but recoil in shock. They are burning! I cannot see the flames but their cries are Heard booming in my head. I've fallen to my knees from Sharing in their pain. Something darts past my head. It was an arrow! My heart is gripped by fear. A night attack?! I peer at the dark shapes coming towards me and realize that our enemies are doing the unthinkable. I must warn my tribe! Before I'm able to turn and run, a sharp pain pierces my arm. I'd felt the rush of air there. An arrow's flight has passed through my body. I check my burning injury and feel blood. My mouth opens to cry out a warning but my throat is constricted. I'm suffering from shock. Two dark forms rush towards me. No war cry is uttered and I realize why. They hope to make a surprise attack on my People. No! I'm dropping to all fours, making the Change happen to my body. I've become a bear. The enemy warriors grab hold of my hairy arms and gasp with fright. I toss them away as if they were but empty sacks. Something strikes me. I've heard the twang of bows. An arrow is sprouting from my chest that my paw swipes away. It leaves a burning hurt. More men approach. I release an angry growl and attack! Spear-bearing warriors shoot arrows at me and a spear is thrown. They all miss. I fall over the frightened men and leave their broken bodies piled at my feet. They are no match to my strength. My hulk is slow to turn but I find no more men within view. They are dead. Yet I know that many more are advancing on my tribe. My People must be warned! But not in this form. I'm feeling the Change take place, reverting me back into a human being that leaves me weak and helpless. I'm reaching for the bundle hanging down along my chest. The tiny hairs rise at the back of my neck in expectation of something... Evil. Before I can think of running, a strong hand is clamped over my mouth. My arms are held. I'm trying to struggle free but there are two men holding me. I Sense hatred and their great concern in preventing me from crying out a warning. They are preventing me from drawing on the strength of my bundle. "Tee-eh ahn zee, Willow Bird." The words hold no meaning for me but I hear malice in them. Such hatred in his voice when uttering my name. Panic fills me. I try kicking the man at my left side but his grip of my arm doesn't falter. I'm lifted from the ground by the two men. A dark form approaches me. Not another Spear-bearing warrior but someone shorter. It is the boy who'd spoken my name with such malice. I can barely make out his face in the dark. The campfires I've left behind casts some light over him. One moment I can see him in the flickering light and in the next, it becomes too dark. Yet I know who this boy is. It's Tash-o-gwa. Trickster. I gasp with fear. I'm so bound by fright by meeting Tash-o-gwa that there would be no need to be covering my mouth. The men drop me back to the ground and my arms are pulled behind my back. I feel something being wrapped around my hands. It bites into my wrists. The boy's cold palm presses against my chest. His touch makes my skin crawl. I'm unable to Send my thoughts to him or to Read what he is thinking. The two warriors restraining my arms are also beyond my Reach. I've been thwarted by Evil! Where is Thump to protect me? Oh, no! I left him sleeping. Laughter. I hear the boy's high-pitched yelps that reminds me of a wolf. His palm roams higher up my chest and with a sudden snap, he takes my bundle. The acorn within still sleeps. Out of reach and unaware of my need for its Power. My voice is muffled against the warrior's hand covering my mouth when I cry out in utter despair! Silence. I'm falling into shock from the arrow wounds to my left arm and chest. Changing has also left me feeling weak. My legs no longer support me so the two men tighten their grip of my arms. I am turned away from camp. Dragged deeper into the woods, likely to my death. I've closed my eyes when withdrawing deep within myself. Not only to escape Evil but to concentrate on regaining my strength. I Hear something. The tree's faint Song that's twisted by pain, horror and a terrible sense of helplessness. Anger consumes me like the fire sweeping this forest! I Send my Plea for help Outwards and the trees respond. The warriors at my side are attacked. I hear the angry swishing of tree limbs and leaves are falling over us like rain. There are cries of fear. My captors' grip loosens from me and I spring away. Tash-o-gwa snarls in anger. I'm turning to that evil youth to reclaim what he's stolen from me. To loosen the tied thong around my wrists, I Change my hands briefly to an otter's slim flippers. My human hands then return to me. Freed. I rush to Tash-o-gwa who gasps in disbelief. We struggle together, falling to the dirt. I grasp his closed left hand that's formed in a fist. He swings it upwards to land a blow to my chin. Pain! Yet I've kept my tight grip of his arm and I sink my teeth into it. It's his turn to cry out in pain. Leaves are raining down on us like hail stones. A branch strikes us both. We're unable to rise from the ground so furious the trees are to reach us. I realize that they can't tell between us but vent their anger on any two legged in Their Forest. I'm glad that I had warned my People not to enter these woods. My own concerns return to me. I'm in a death struggle with a Trickster! He has something of mine. In his left hand. My fingers push through his until I manage to touch upon my bundle. He snarls at me with great anger. I Send my warning cry to the acorn and it awakens. "Eiii! Paht-nu, Kalinlepi!" shouts Tash-o-gwa to one of his warriors. A heavy thud strikes my back. The wave of heat passing through my body almost leaves me senseless. Yet I've taken my bundle back. My left arm doesn't respond and that's when I realize with horror that a spear is stuck through me. My lungs burn when I take a breath. I'm crawling over the ground. Dazed. I reach for my left shoulder and feel a lot of blood. A flint point sticks out from my underarm. My body trembles from the pain. Weakens. It's a mortal blow. I am going to die... My life flashes before me. A happy boyhood that was interrupted by my father's death. How my mother took care of me until Big Horn came to become my second father, and lover. I See the dear faces of Song Bird, Crying Loon, Sah-umb and all those sweet boys whom I have loved. The men, too. I'm Seeing all the places I've been to during my brief manhood. All my accomplishments. And my mistakes. I'm crawling over the ground to deny Death's grip over me. In the distance are seen the glowing campfires of my People. I... must... reach them! I open my mouth to cry out a warning. Blood gurgles with my exhale. My head strikes the dirt. A painful breath is taken into my lungs; my last one? My strength is gone. The sharp pain from my shoulder and arrow wounds is fading. Not a good sign. I grieve for myself, this body that death is soon to claim. Hope fills me though. My Other Self will carry on the sacred task after I am gone. 'Other Self! Hear me!' There's an answering Call from Running Wolf. He's Heard me. The small bundle in my hand throbs with Power. I could use the acorn to Heal myself by trading its life for mine. The temptation is great! Ah, but no. I must save my People instead. I pinch the acorn towards the pouch's opening and bite down on it. I pop him inside my mouth. Swallow. My throat feels the sharpness of his crown. My stomach swells with Power. Our spirits join and the Change comes over me. My feet dig into the soft dirt as roots while my broken body lifts with my arms stretching outwards as tree limbs. I join into the Song of this forest as one of them. 'Awaken!' I plead. 'Oh trees of the forest, Hear me. Awaken and act! The enemy has set fire to the woods and they hold spears aimed at the hearts of my People. Awaken ancient spirits. Be in trees and stop them!' My feet boil over the ground. I'm trying to reach the tipis of my tribe to warn them too of attack but I become rooted; unmoving. This place is where I'll stand as a weeping willow amongst my Forest Kin. They are my People now. I'm swept into their Song. One of pain and agony from fiery deaths to some of us but many more remain to Sing with joy. A beautiful voice as One! I am welcomed into their tribe as a young one with much to teach if there's time. My life is close to its end as measured by a tree. I'd already be dead if I had remained human. A part of me still is. My urgent Plea is given to protect the two legs who were my People by the river. Attack those two legged amongst us! It is done. An Ancient Voice goes through the forest. It comes to where I stand, filling me with warmth and understanding. Not in words, emotions or familiar images. It is too alien. Yet I hearken to this Voice. Sadness fills me. My existence is close to an end. There will be no teachings. Only this: a warning. I'm Shown what the Forest People have been guarding for generations of trees without count: a sky fallen fingernail of our father that's buried deep beneath their feet in our Mother. It is of Great Power. That's given them Voice and an Awakening to rejoice in living awareness of self. But that's threatened. At some future moon measured in two tree lives (or four human lives) the source of their Power will be uncovered, dug up and stolen by white men. They are clever in discovering some of our Father's Great Crafting of the All but not wise in how to use it. Especially when it's turned against themselves. Dread fills me. I See what will happen if the hand doesn't stop them. My hand! My existence passes through four boys until that terrible moment to try stopping it. An end to all life. I've felt the passing of Father Sun over my head. There's no joy since most of my leaves have dropped to the ground like sad tears. My limbs have hardened from lack of life-giving sap. Roots are cold. I'll soon be nourishing our Mother's creatures who eat of our bodies. The Song fades in me... 'Make the Leap, Willow Bird!' That's Ring Boy's plea. I'm so weary and long for rest in the Above. 'No. It is not your time There yet. With your last leaf, make the Leap to him who stands before you weeping but filled with hope. Do it!' My tree self is cut off from the Singing. A part of myself that is still human and known as Willow Bird resides in the fingertip of a drooping branch. It is loosened. Falling. Falling into darkness until... Light! I've fallen on my butt but a strong arm lifts me from the ground. I see a dead weeping willow tree before me through tear filled eyes. He was Willow Bird. My small right hand opens. Yes. I've caught his last leaf and Felt him Passing into me. "Runn... Wolf!" gasps Thump. "You alright?" I turn my small naked body to face this huge man. "Yes. We're both okay." Second Bird gives me a puzzled look. Then his eyes widen when I nod to him. I'm leaping into my brother's opening arms for an embrace. A really tight one. *** Author's Note: I hope you've enjoyed this series. Beginning in the summer of 1988, the first book was written: "How Willow Bird Finds His Love" that became the illustrated booklet: "Willow Bird Finds His Love" sold in ADL bookstores. The second booklet in the series was called: "Brave Willow Bird" followed by "Willow Bird Warrior" that was included in the "Indian Boys at Play" booklet. With the advent of the Internet, these stories were revised and expanded as computer text files posted on the Nifty Archive. You have just finished the fourth book in this series with "Shaman Willow Bird". This saga continues in: "Willow Bird, Leader of the Mahyee-na". This series will not begin until I've finished the conclusion (part 10) to my popular series, "New to Love" at the end of July 2003. "New to Teaching Love" will follow it. You can find all of my stories on the Nifty Archive at: www.Nifty.Org/ - a great FREE website. Thank you, David! Contact me with your questions/comments at either of my email addresses: Vince_Water@HotMail.com Vince_Water@Yahoo.com VinceWater@HotMail.com VinceWater@Yahoo.com -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- End file: SHAMAN15.TXT Series continues: 'Willow Bird, Leader of the Mahyee-na'