Date: Thu, 06 Dec 2001 19:09:45 +0000
From: Stephanie M
Subject: Black Eyes, Blue Tears 1-6

Title: Black Eyes, Blue Tears
Author: Stephanie M
Summary: AJ discovers the truth behind Lance and JC's intense relationship.
Feedback: This is not my normal type of story, I'd love to hear what
everyone thinks.
Disclaimer: This is entirely fiction i.e. not true. I don't know Nsync or
the Backstreet Boys nor do I know anything about their true sexuality. This
story is not meant to imply anything about the true sexuality of the
celebrities mentioned herein.
Warnings: JC bashing-sorry if that upsets anyone. Discussion of abuse.
Status: WIP

Part 1

Lance ran out into the hall not caring where he was going just wanting to
escape. He was running down the corridor, when he suddenly hit something
solid and fell to the floor. Seeing AJ he got up quickly trying to hide his
face.

"Are you okay?" AJ asked having caught sight of the tears in Lance's eyes.

"Don't worry I'm alright I just need to get out of here." Lance said trying
to sound like he wasn't going to burst into tears.

"Want to come up to my room? I can honestly say no one will look for you
there. Its just down the corridor, for some reason the record company made a
mistake and booked me on this floor instead of with the rest of the group."
AJ said with a smile, as he led the way to his room.

Lance followed him, at the same time wondering how to explain what had
happened earlier. Asking himself if anyone would believe the truth, knowing
that it was unlikely, JC had made sure of that.

"Come in Lance, I promise not to bite." AJ said as he waited for the younger
man to walk inside.

Lance entered the room and waited for AJ to close the door, knowing that he
couldn't take the risk of someone over hearing the conversation.

"Want to tell me what has you so upset?" AJ asked as he motioned Lance to
sit down, passing the other man a Sprite from the freezer.

Taking the can, Lance quickly drank a big mouthful, his mouth suddenly dry
at the prospect of revealing the truth. Lance had never told anyone about
the past year and wasn't entirely sure that AJ wouldn't get angry.

"I made JC angry and I didn't want to wait around for him to catch me."
Lance answered hoping that AJ wouldn't ask for the details, not sure that he
could go into them without breaking down completely.

"What'll happen when he finds you?" AJ said a sick feeling in his stomach,
knowing that there was something wrong with Lance.

"It depends on how upset he is." Lance answered his voice so low AJ had to
strain to hear him.

"Why are you scared of him, Lance?" AJ asked not entirely sure if he wanted
to know the answer.

"I know him and I know what'll happen." Lance answered, shaking as he
flashed on the memories of what had happened the last time he made JC mad.

"Lance why don't you wait here for me while I go and make a quick phone
call?" AJ suggested as he moved to the bathroom, wanting to make sure Lance
wouldn't overhear.

Lance nodded and smiled at AJ's back, feeling safe there for the moment, a
rare feeling for him as he spent most of his life afraid of what would
happen if he let his guard down.
*******
AJ took his cell phone from his pocket and dialled a number quickly, not
wanting to leave Lance alone any longer than necessary. For some reason he
felt protective of Lance, maybe it was because of the fear he had seen in
the younger man's eyes at JC's name.

"D is that you?" AJ asked when he heard a voice on the other end of the
line.

"Yeah, its me. What's wrong, Bone?" Howie asked wondering why his friend was
calling when they were supposed to meet in only a couple of minutes.

"I can't make it to dinner tonight. Can you tell everyone that I'm sorry?"
AJ replied knowing that the rest of the group would be angry at his skipping
out on them.

"Why's that?" Howie said confused.

"I bumped into an old friend earlier and I want to spend sometime with
them." AJ answered, he was telling the truth even if he did leave out a few
details.

"Okay, see you later." Howie replied as he ended the call.
*******
AJ walked into the lounge where he found Lance asleep, obviously exhausted.
AJ gently picked up the other man and carried him into the bedroom. He
placed Lance on the bed and covered the other man up, Lance immediately
rolled up into a ball.

AJ stayed in the bedroom, with Lance wondering just why the younger man had
caught his attention and why he was feeling angry with JC for upsetting him.
He got the feeling that Lance had a very good reason for being scared of JC.
If only Lance would tell him what that was.

AJ was brought out of his thoughts by the sound of Lance whimpering and
whispering in his sleep, obviously in the throes of a nightmare. AJ moved
towards the bed intending on waking the terrified Lance but before he could
do that Lance opened his eyes and stared at him.

"I'm sorry, I won't do it again, please don't, no...JC, please! I'm sorry JC
please don't hit me again, I promise I'll be good. I'll be good..." Lance
chanted as he looked over at the other man.

As he listened to Lance's words, AJ started to cry himself. It was clear
from the way Lance was acting that it was a memory not a dream. He couldn't
believe that JC was hurting Lance and no one had noticed or even worse that
they knew and were ignoring it.

Moving slowly over to the bed, he quickly lay down next to the terrified
Lance. Soothingly rubbing circles on Lance's back, he wondered just what he
should do to help his friend now that he knew the truth.

"Lance, it AJ. No one is going to hurt you. It's okay; I'll make sure no one
hurts you. Lance its Alex, JC's not here." AJ whispered into Lance's ear,
hoping that he could comfort his friend. Gently he got Lance to lay down,
moving so that he was holding the younger man. AJ continued to whisper
reassurances, not noticing that he was falling asleep.
********
Lance awoke to the feeling of arms holding him, he stiffened hoping, praying
that it wasn't JC. Taking a look over his shoulder he was relieved to find
that it was AJ. A part of his mind wondered just why AJ was in bed with him
but he relaxed knowing that both of them were still fully clothed and that
AJ wouldn't hurt him.

AJ woke up as he felt Lance trying to get out of bed without much luck. He
had held Lance all night, wanting to make sure his friend was safe. Seeing
Lance was clearly eager to move, AJ let go and let the younger man move out
of the bed. As Lance walked to the bathroom, AJ got out of bed and groaned
when he saw it wasn't even six am yet.

"Lance, I need to talk to you." AJ said as Lance walked into the room.

The pair walked out into the lounge, both worried about the upcoming
discussion but for different reasons. Lance was worried that no one would
believe him if he told the truth whereas AJ was worried that he would upset
Lance if he voiced his suspicions.

"Can you tell me about why you're so scared of JC?" AJ asked once Lance had
sat down.

"I can't, I'm sorry." Lance replied, looking at the floor.

"I know he hurts you, Lance." AJ said, his voice low with anger.

"Its my fault, if I didn't make him angry he wouldn't do it." Lance said
guilt clear in his voice.

"Its not your fault and I'm not angry at you. I just want to know what's
happening to you, Lance." AJ countered, seeing that Lance really believed it
was his fault.

"It started a couple of mouths after I joined the group, at first it was
just a small pinch when I did something wrong but now he punches me or kicks
me if I do something wrong." Lance whispered, still looking at the floor.

"How often does he hit you?" AJ questioned, relieved that Lance was starting
to open up.

"He only hits me when I mess up or when I make him look bad. He does it so
that I'll learn, that's all." Lance answered truly believing that it was in
his best interests.

"How often, Lance?" AJ asked once again.

"Normally only five times a week but its because I'm bad." Lance answered,
sure that JC would hurt him if he discovered that Lance had revealed the
truth to someone-especially AJ.

"It's not your fault, Lance." AJ said as he moved over to where Lance was
sitting.

AJ quickly hugged Lance, knowing that Lance needed someone to comfort him
and that the younger man needed help to get away from JC. As he held Lance,
he felt tears soak through his shirt as Lance started to cry.

"Its okay, Lance. I'll help you." AJ whispered into Lance's ear at the same
time wondering how he could get the Lance away from JC.

"No one can help me." Lance said dejectedly, the last time he had told
someone they had laughed at him but AJ was actually listening to him.

"Have you told anyone else about JC?" AJ asked wanting to know if there was
anyone, he could talk to about getting Lance far away from JC.

"I told Justin but he only laughed at me." Lance answered sadly, remembering
how hurt he had been that his friend didn't believe him.

"I'm going to shower, why don't you order breakfast?" AJ said as he walked
out of the room.

On his way to the bathroom, AJ grabbed his phone from the bedside table and
quickly walked into the bathroom. Turning the shower on so that he could
make sure Lance didn't hear he dialled Howie's number.

"Howie. It's me and I need some help-fast." AJ said as soon as Howie picked
up the phone.

"What have you done now?" Howie asked trying to shake off the remains of
sleep.

"If I tell you something can you keep it a secret?" AJ asked his voice
serious.

"Of course, I'd never betray you. What's the secret?" Howie said, sensing
that it was something big.

"Lance is getting beaten up by JC and I want to help him." AJ answered.

"Lance Bass?" Howie asked his brain not entirely awake.

"Do you know anyone else called Lance? Look, I'm not letting him go back to
JC or those friends of his but I need to know how I can help him." AJ said
his voice determined.

"The first thing would be to tell the rest of his group and see if they can
do anything." Howie said unable to think of anything else at the moment.

"Call Chris and the others and ask them to come to my room as soon as
possible. Make sure that no one tells JC, please. I'll call Kevin, Brian and
Nick between the nine of us we're bound to come up with something." AJ said
before turning off the phone and jumping in the shower.

AJ showered as fast as possible, not wanting to leave Lance alone any longer
than necessary. He knew that it was probably going to be impossible to get
Lance away from JC without help but at the same time, he didn't think the
rest of Nsync would be much use.
******
"AJ, I've ordered breakfast, it'll be up in a couple of minutes." Lance
shouted into the bathroom, before retreating to the lounge.

As he waited for AJ, Lance tried to figure out why the other man was helping
him. He had always assumed that JC was only hitting him because he wanted to
make Lance better and hadn't bothered getting angry about it. After the
years of abuse, he had come to think that it was his fault and that it was
normal. The rest of Nsync hadn't bothered to think about the almost constant
bruises, always believing him when he said he fell or banged into something.

A loud knock on the door brought Lance out of his thoughts, seeing AJ was
still in the shower, he opened the door. A part of his mind wondered if
anyone would think it suspicious that he was in AJ's room so early but he
couldn't bring himself to care. He was more worried about what would happen
when JC found him, and JC would find him, he always did.

"Thanks." Lance said to the boy, giving a high tip. Seconds later the boy
left with a small wave.

Grabbing a robe, AJ walked into the lounge, his stomach calling for food. He
found Lance busy pouring coffee and orange juice. With a smile AJ sat down
and started to place food onto his plate, seconds later Lance copied him.

"After breakfast, can I call the rest of my group and ask them to come over?
I know you're scared of JC finding out that you told me but I think I'll
need their help to get you away from him." AJ said, knowing that he had to
tell Lance his plans.

"Are you sure they won't tell JC or be angry with me?" Lance asked his voice
like a lost child.

"No one is blaming you, Lance and they won't tell him. They wouldn't do
something like that. Is it okay if I call Justin, Chris and Joey and invite
them over, as well?" AJ said softly, he could tell that Lance thought that
his friends would think he was making it up.

"I guess, you'll be here right?" Lance replied, not wanting to alone in case
JC found him. He knew that JC would be angry because he had run away last
night and an angry JC meant that he ended up with more bruises than normal.

"Sure, I won't leave you alone." AJ said solemnly.

As soon as he finished breakfast, AJ walked over to the hotel phone and
dialled Kevin's room. After a couple of minutes, he heard Kevin mumble an
indistinct greeting.

"Kev, you awake?" AJ asked wanting to make sure Kevin was conscious.

"I am now. What do you want at...six thirty in the morning?" Kevin replied
wearily.

"It's an emergency. Can you come to my room in a couple of minutes? Bring
Nick and Brian with you." AJ replied, knowing that Kevin wouldn't be happy
at being woken up so early when they didn't have any meetings until noon.

"What sort of emergency?" Kevin replied concerned that something had
happened to AJ.

"I can't get into it on the phone. Just come to my room in five minutes with
the others. I'll call Howie myself. See you later." AJ said, ending the call
and dialling Howie's number.

"Come to my room in five minutes with the Chris, Justin and Joey. Don't tell
JC." AJ said as soon as he heard Howie.

Satisfied that everything was sorted AJ ended the call and turned back to
Lance who was staring at him admiration burning in his eyes. AJ pushed the
tray out into the hall, looking around in case JC was searching for Lance.

"Thanks. Have you got any clothes I can borrow?" Lance said, not wanting to
go back to the room he shared with JC.

"Yeah, but I'm not sure if they'll fit you." AJ replied walking into the
bedroom, Lance following seconds behind. Opening the closet, AJ took out a
pair of black jeans and a black tank top. Rustling through his underwear, he
passed Lance a pair of black socks and pants.

"I'll get dressed while you shower." AJ said, ushering Lance into the
bathroom, wanting to be organised for when the others turned up.

Lance showered quickly, knowing that he didn't have long before he had to
face everyone and tell them the secret he had kept hidden for years, How
would they treat him once they knew the truth? Lance walked into the bedroom
and dressed quickly, walking into the other room while still towel drying
his hair. Looking up at the feeling of eyes on him, Lance found himself
staring at the shocked and confused faces of his seven friends.

"Why have you just come out of AJ's bedroom?" Chris asked the question that
was in everyone's mind.

"I stayed here last night." Lance replied not wanting to go into details and
tell everyone that he had ran to AJ because he was afraid of JC.

"If you'd all sit down, I'll tell you all why I asked everyone here so
early." AJ stated, sitting down next to Lance, remembering his promise not
to leave his friend alone.

"We thought something had happened to you. JC said that you just disappeared
yesterday." Justin said to Lance angrily.

"You should tell them Lance, they really need to hear it from you." AJ
whispered to Lance.

Lance started shaking thinking about what would happen if JC found out that
he told them. He stopped when AJ pulled him close, comforting him through
touch. Their behaviour only caused their friends to look at them in
confusion, wondering why the pair where so close.

"I ran into AJ last night in the hall when I was running away from JC. I was
crying and AJ let me hide out in his room." Lance said, swallowing he
continued, "I had made Josh mad because I answered him back and he was going
to teach me not to but I ran."

"What do you mean teach you?" Chris asked his voice low.

"He was going to hit me, he does it when I do something wrong to teach me
not to." Lance said, looking at the floor. He didn't want to see the hate
and disgust on the faces of his friends, he knew it was his fault and that
he was weak for not being able to stop JC.

"Not this again. You're lying Lance, JC wouldn't hurt anyone especially
you." Justin said his voice sure.

"Its true. I know it's my fault and I'm sorry." Lance said hopelessly.

"Shut up, Justin. Lance wouldn't make this up, you should know that." Joey
said as he looked at his friend wondering why he hadn't realised.

Chris moved to Lance and pulled the younger man from the chair into a
crushing hug, looking at his friend in alarm when Lance gave a yelp of pain.
Letting go, Chris moved away from Lance and slowly lifted up his friend's
top despite Lance's protests.

The eight men stared in shock at Lance's chest, the younger man was covered
in a mixture of black and blue bruises, mainly on the ribs. AJ noticed the
cut down Lance's back. He gently followed the pattern, seeing that a knife
had been rubbed across Lance's back, making the skin an angry red.

Lance lowered his top, not wanting anyone to see the signs of his faults.
Lance was sure that if he had been better, Josh wouldn't have had to hurt
him. AJ sat down in shock, he wanted nothing more than to find JC, and beat
him up but if he did it wouldn't help Lance.

As soon as AJ sat down, Lance moved so that he was practically on the other
man's lap. He wanted to be in the only place he felt safe and that was with
AJ but he knew that it couldn't last. He had no choice but to return to JC
and his normal life of pain, he was still a member of Nsync and nothing AJ
could do would change that.

Title: Black Eyes, Blue Tears 2/?
Author: Stephanie M wicciangirl51@hotmail.com
Summary: AJ discovers the truth behind Lance and JC's intense relationship.
Feedback: This is not my normal type of story; I would love to hear what
everyone thinks.
Disclaimer: This is entirely fiction i.e. not true. I don't know Nsync or
the Backstreet Boys.
Warnings: JC bashing-sorry if that upsets anyone. Discussion of abuse

Part 2

"So what are we going to do now?" Joey asked knowing that he couldn't allow
Lance to stay with JC now he knew the truth.

"I need your help to get Lance away from him." AJ stated, as he pulled Lance
onto his knee.

"JC's in love with you so why does he hit you?" Justin said in confusion
before stopping when he realised he had voiced his thoughts and everyone was
staring at him.

"I know he's in love with me, he told me a couple of weeks after I joined
the group, but that doesn't mean a thing." Lance said causing everyone to
look at him in shock. Lance simply buried his head into AJ's chest.

"Just because JC loves him doesn't give him the right to hurt Lance." Chris
spat out, watching the way Lance was holding onto AJ.

"JC said he didn't want to hurt me but it was my fault for behaving the way
I do." Lance said half to himself, not realising that AJ had heard him.

"It's not your fault, never think that it is. The only person to blame is
JC, he's the one who hurts you." AJ whispered into Lance's ear, at the same
time wondering if Lance would ever believe him.

"How long has he been hurting you?" Chris asked, feeling it was a while from
the way Lance was acting.

"A month after I joined the group, he started pinching me when I did
something wrong but then it got worse. I told him that I wasn't in love with
him and he started punching me in the stomach because I had made him mad but
he said sorry afterwards." Lance answered, remembering the day clearly.

"Lance are you in a relationship with JC?" Kevin asked, wanting to know the
details.

"It depends what you mean, for the last year he's raped me at least once a
week but I don't think that is really a relationship. He seems to think we
are though, he thinks he owns me and that he has the right to use me however
he feels. The last time I tried to stop him from raping me he left me tied
up for a couple of days without food, when he returned I was too weak to
stop him." Lance said his voice weary. He didn't see the point in going over
everything that had happened when there wasn't anything anyone could do to
help him.

"Why didn't you tell one of us what was happening?" Chris questioned,
wanting to know why he had missed the signs that his friend was being
abused.

"I told Justin that Josh was hitting me just over a year ago, before the
rapes started. Justin laughed at me and told Josh and I just ended up with a
more brutal beating than normal, that night was the first time he raped me.
You hate me, don't you?" Lance said, before breaking down in tears as he
remembered that day-the day he gave up any hope of one of his friends
helping.

Justin looked at Lance and wondered how he could have thought his friend was
making it up and he felt guilt and anger over his behaviour. Was it his
fault that JC had started raping Lance? Lance himself had admitted that the
first time JC ever raped him was that night. If he had just listened to
Lance he may have been able to save Lance from the last year of rapes, but
he had dismissed it all as a sick joke. Now Lance was sitting here, telling
them all it was his own fault that he was raped and beaten, and Justin could
tell that Lance believed what he was saying.

"We don't hate you, Lance. But now that we know what's been happening we can
stop JC". Brian said his voice low and soothing.

"No one can stop him-maybe I should go back now and get it over with." Lance
said to himself, looking up when he felt eyes watching him.

"You could press charges against him. Would you do that?" Nick asked,
already knowing the answer.

"If I do that everyone will know what happened and it's be the end of Nsync.
Even if I press charges it's only my word against his and who'd believe me?"
Lance said, he had already thought about it when JC had first started
hitting him.

"What about making JC see a psychiatrist?" Howie asked suspecting that there
was something wrong with JC if the other man could hurt someone he claimed
to love.

"I don't think we could make him do that." Justin said, knowing how stubborn
and angry JC was.

"The first thing is to cancel the rest of your tour." AJ told the four Nsync
members, not wanting Lance to spend any time with JC if he could help it.

"I'll talk to Johnny and see if we can do something between us." Chris
stated, picking up the phone to make the call.

"I'm staying with Lance today-can you tell the magazine I'm sick or
something?" AJ said to Kevin, not wanting to leave Lance, he had promise to
stay with the younger man and he could keep his promise. The main reason he
wanted to stay with Lance was just in case JC found the younger man; he
wanted to be there to protect Lance if the need arose.

"Of course, who's going to keep an eye on JC? We can't take the chance that
he finds Lance or suspects that you're hiding him." Howie said, wanting to
make sure his friends were safe or at least as safe as they could be with JC
still around.

"I'll do that, he won't suspect anything if I spend the day with him. I'll
tell him I haven't seen Lance if he asks and everyone else should do the
same." Justin said, wanting to atone for his earlier dismissal of Lance's
words as lies.
*******
Chris quickly dialled Johnny's number and impatiently started drumming on
the table. He wanted to go and face JC and make him pay for what he had done
to Lance. He had sworn to protect Lance but he had failed to even see that
his friend was being hurt from someone he should have been able to trust.
How many other things had he simply refused to see?

"Chris, what's wrong?" Johnny asked concerned, he had never expected to hear
from Chris, he normally talked to Lance about any problems.

"We've just found out that JC has been beating Lance since a month after he
joined the group and for the last year JC has been raping him. We need to
get Lance away from JC as soon as possible." Chris said, fighting to keep in
control, the very words made him sick to the stomach.

Johnny couldn't believe what he was hearing; he had never suspected JC was
capable of what Chris was telling them. He had always thought the
relationship between JC and Lance was intense to say the least-he realised
that it must have been because Lance was afraid of JC.

"Oh God, how did you find out?" Johnny asked, aghast at what had happened.

"Lance just told us but he thinks he deserved it. Can we get someone to talk
to Lance?" Chris said, knowing that his friend needed help to get through
the years of pain and fear.

"I'll call a friend of mine who specialises in domestic abuse and ask her to
see him as fast as possible. Is Lance safe for now?" Johnny answered, trying
to think of what he could do now.

"Yeah-AJ's going to stay with him for now and JC still thinks Lance is
missing." Chris said, noticing the way Lance was sitting on AJ's knee,
holding onto AJ like he was never going to let the other man go. Was Lance
simply latching onto the first person he felt had protected him or did Lance
have feelings for AJ? The issue was too much for Chris to go into at the
moment, but he knew that he had to discuss it with the others.

"I'll find somewhere for Lance to hideout while we deal with JC. Has Lance
considered pressing charges?" Johnny said, the tapping of keys could be
heard clearly through their connection.

"He said that if he presses charges everyone will find out and he doesn't
want that." Chris said, privately thinking that he would do his best to get
Lance to go to the police.

"I'll talk to a friend of mine who works with the police and see if we can
come up with something. Tell Lance that I'm going to help him and have
someone watch JC." Johnny said, seconds before he ended the call.

"Johnny said he has a friend he wants to talk too about pressing charges and
he's going to get you somewhere to stay until we deal with JC." Chris said
looking at Lance; he wanted his friend to know everything that was
happening.

"You'll come with me, won't you?" Lance asked AJ, looking the other man
straight in the eyes.

AJ could see the fear in Lance's eyes and knew then that he would do
everything in his power to take that fear away. A part of his mind was
telling him that it was a bad idea to fall in love with Lance when the
younger man was vulnerable but it was pointless. AJ already knew that he was
starting to fall for Lance but wasn't going to reveal his feelings while
Lance was still confused-he wouldn't take advantage of his friend like that.

"I'll come with you. I won't leave you alone, Lance I promise." AJ said,
letting Lance see the truth in his eyes.

The pair didn't see the alarmed looks their friends shared at their
behaviour, instead they were looking in each other's eyes. To them the world
had faded away as they revelled in their new bond.

Title: Black Eyes, Blue Tears 3/?
Author: Stephanie M wicciangirl51@hotmail.com
Summary: AJ discovers the truth behind Lance and JC's intense relationship.
Feedback: This is not my normal type of story; I would love to hear what
everyone thinks.
Disclaimer: This is entirely fiction i.e. not true. I don't know Nsync or
the Backstreet Boys.
Warnings: JC bashing-sorry if that upsets anyone. Discussion of abuse

Part 3

Howie watched the scene in front of him and mentally groaned, it was clear
at least to him that AJ was starting to fall for Lance. He was certain that
the pair shouldn't start a relationship until JC was dealt with. Lance had
spent years being abused and wouldn't be emotionally ready for a
relationship for a while, he knew that AJ wouldn't push the other man but he
wondered if the situation would be too much strain for AJ to handle.

Joey watched the couple-or at least that's what he figured they'd be get
lost gazing into the other's eyes. He couldn't understand why this had
happened to Lance but perhaps no one could. He had always assumed that it
was the kind of thing that happened to strangers but it had actually
happened to someone he cared about. As Joey watched Lance, he could see the
fear in the man's eyes, Lance looked like he expected everyone to leave him
alone and vulnerable-but essentially that was what had happened. For years
he was abused, no one had noticed, he hadn't even noticed, and he was
supposed to be Lance's best friend.

Kevin was feeling angry and sad, the anger was over how Lance had been
treated but it was also at himself, he had spent hours with Nsync and had
never noticed. Well that wasn't strictly true, he had noticed that JC's eyes
would follow Lance whenever the younger man moved but had always assumed the
pair were dating. He couldn't help but think that Lance would never be the
same again, a stupid thought but true. Of course, Lance would never be the
same but had he really known the true Lance? He had never really known
Lance, Kevin realised in that moment, he had always accepted the happy, shy
image Lance had projected but Lance had never been happy he had perfected
the image probably to keep people from realising so that he wouldn't be
punished.

Justin was feeling was feeling sick and angry. He wasn't sure which emotion
would win but he wanted to run and hide. He felt guilty as he remembered
every time he had gone out, leaving Lance alone with JC. He had never
suspected JC would hurt Lance, oh yeah he'd wondered why Lance had come to
him crying and begging for help to hide from JC. He had dismissed it as a
joke and had told JC; looking back Justin could see the anger that had
flashed into Josh's eyes for a second. The next day Lance had avoided
looking at everyone, Justin had always assumed it was because he was
embarrassed over what he had said about JC. Lance had been embarrassed
alright but not for the reason he had always assumed, he could even remember
the way Lance had walked funny, something Justin had teased him about all
day. He had ignored the pain in Lance's eyes that had grown with every joke.

Nick didn't know what to do, he wanted to help Lance, but he wasn't sure if
Lance would accept his help. From Lance's behaviour, it was clear that the
other man was afraid and embarrassed but was that because of what happened
or was it because he wasn't able to stop JC? Lance had said he was weak
earlier but Nick couldn't help but think that nothing was further from the
truth; Lance was the strongest person he had ever known. Lance had spent
years being abused and had come out of it relatively intact, yeah there were
scars were but what amazed him was that Lance was still able to trust
someone. Nick was positive that if it had happened to him he wouldn't have
been able to make it, he probably would have surrendered years ago. He just
hoped that Lance would let AJ help him; Lance needed someone to hold onto
and someone to feel safe with.

Chris was certain that AJ had feelings for Lance or at least he was heading
that way. AJ was already protective of Lance and cared about him, it
wouldn't be that much further for the friendship to turn into love. He
couldn't help but think that if AJ did anything to hurt Lance he would
happily kill the Backstreet Boy. He had failed Lance once, he wouldn't do it
again.

Lance yawned, then looked around in embarrassment. Looking at the clock, he
discovered that it was only just ten am and he was already tired. He
wondered what would happen now, it was easy for someone to promise to get
him away from JC, but until it happened, he wasn't going to hold his breath.
Words didn't mean a thing, JC had promised he'd never hurt him after every
beating and rape, he'd learnt the hard way not to take anyone at their word.
AJ was different to JC, he had cried and AJ didn't even shout at him. Lance
knew that if he cried with JC he would have gotten at least a punch as
punishment, depending on JC's mood.

"Time for you to go." AJ said looking at the seven men, who were still
staring at the pair.

Lance nestled further into AJ's arms fear burning in his eyes, as Kevin
approached. It was a purely instinctive reaction, in that second he had
flashed on the events of only two days ago when he'd accidentally spilt a
drink on JC's notebook. He calmed as he felt AJ's hands move gently around
his waist.

With an embarrassed smile, Lance looked up at Kevin and saw the guilt in the
older man's eyes. He could see that Kevin felt he had done something to make
Lance so afraid. Gently tapping AJ's arms to signal the other man to let go,
Lance stood and walked over to Kevin and stopped in front of the older man.
He was shocked when Kevin hugged him for a second Lance tensed, expecting to
feel pain any second. Mentally chanting that he was safe and AJ was nearby,
Lance willed his body to relax and returned the hug for a few seconds,
smiling when he heard Kevin promise that he would help stop JC. It was sweet
that so many people were trying to help him; Lance thought to himself, he
admitted to himself that it was a useless effort. JC would find him and
exact his punishment; he had found Lance the last time he had run away.

As Kevin walked away, Lance was startled to see the other six all waiting to
hug him, he turned and arched his eyebrow to AJ in question. AJ simply
smiled and mouthed the words "I'm here. It's okay."

AJ was relieved to see Lance relax and accept the hugs of his friends; he
knew that Lance was confused by the display of affection. The younger man
had come to expect only pain and recrimination instead of love and
friendship.

Lance hugged each of his friends even if he was confused as to why they
wanted to touch him. He was dirty and he didn't deserve to be touched, at
least that's what he believed. Lance knew it was true because JC had told
him every night that he was dirty and no one would ever want to touch him
after they knew the truth.

AJ closed the door with a sigh, placing a Do Not Disturb sign on the
outside. As much as he knew the other seven were needed to get Lance away
from JC, he didn't want them around Lance. The three Nsync members didn't
deserve to be near Lance, AJ felt. The three had ignored all the signs that
Lance was being abused, in his opinion, they didn't deserve to even see
Lance. But AJ knew that his friends were important to Lance, and that the
younger man would need the help of his family and friends. His friends would
be there for him but AJ had no idea about Lance's family. It was possible
that Lance's family would reject it when they learnt the truth; AJ had read
a newspaper report of a case when that happened. He hoped for Lance's sake
that didn't happen, he was sure that Lance wouldn't survive his family's
rejection.

"Time to go to bed, Lance." AJ said, seeing Lance yawning out the corner of
his eye.

"Sure, you aren't angry with me for sleeping with you last night, are you?
I'd understand if you were." Lance said nervously.

"Of course not. Where else were you going to sleep? Do you want me to wake
you up later?" AJ asked, managing not to ask Lance if he could sleep with
him, he wanted to make sure Lance slept okay but was certain that Lance
wouldn't want him there now that he knew about the rapes.

"If...you don't mind I'd like it if you could hold me, just until I go
asleep." Lance said his voice so low, AJ had to strain to hear it.

"I'd like that, I was thinking of going to sleep anyway." AJ said, seeing
how scared Lance was to ask him.

The pair walked into the bedroom in silence. AJ grabbed two old t-shirts
from his bag. Passing one to Lance, AJ quickly changed, looking away so
Lance could do the same. He remembered how self-conscious Lance was about
the bruises and didn't want to do anything that might upset his friend.

Lance quickly got into the bed, pulling the covers over his body, sighing
contently when he realised that the cut on his back wasn't rubbing against
his shirt. AJ quickly got into bed, not moving, unsure of what Lance wanted
him to do. The decision was taken out of his hand, as Lance moved his body
so that his head was lying on AJ's chest and promptly fell asleep; the other
man's heart beat soothing him. AJ started to absently run his hand through
Lance's hair, as he snaked one hand gently around Lance's waist. He wanted
to make sure that Lance was there, he knew he wouldn't sleep unless he was
confident that Lance was safe and with him.

Title: Black Eyes, Blue Tears 4/?
Author: Stephanie M wicciangirl51@hotmail.com
Summary: AJ discovers the truth behind Lance and JC's intense relationship.
Feedback: This is not my normal type of story; I would love to hear what
everyone thinks.
Disclaimer: This is entirely fiction i.e. not true. I don't know Nsync or
the Backstreet Boys.
Warnings: JC bashing-sorry if that upsets anyone. Discussion of abuse

Part 4

Lance screamed in anger, feeling the rope digging into his skin, in front of
him AJ was lying handcuffed to the bed. As he watched helplessly, JC walked
into the room, a cruel smirk on his face. But that wasn't what caught
Lance's attention; in his hand, JC was carrying two lit candles. With a
smile at lance, JC poured the hot wax onto AJ's balls, laughing as AJ howled
in pain.

Lance screamed for JC to let AJ go, shouting that he was sorry and wouldn't
run away again. JC looked at him with emotionless eyes and smiled,
intoxicated by the fear rolling off Lance. Lance watched unable to move, as
JC roughly unfastened the handcuffs, moving AJ so that the other man was on
all fours. Lance knew what was going to happen now only too well... as JC
unfastened his pants Lance howled in protest...and jumped awake crying in
relief that it had all been a dream.

What if JC found out about AJ? Lance's heart pounded in his chest as he
remembered the nightmare and look in JC's eyes. He knew that JC would
delight in making AJ suffer once he found out about their friendship. JC had
always made sure that Lance had no friends outside the group, not that Lance
ever confided in his group mates-he had been taught not too.

Lance smiled as he heard AJ chanting, "Its okay, Lance. I'm here and I'm not
going to let JC hurt you."

Lance didn't know how to explain that he wasn't afraid for himself. He was
used to the pain, fear, and humiliation. But he didn't want AJ to ever have
to go through it and if JC found him, he would delight in breaking AJ. Lance
wouldn't let that happen, not when he had found someone he felt safe with
and could be himself.

The shrill sound of the phone ringing caused both of them to jump, reaching
over with AJ picked up the phone, his other hand still in Lance's hair.

"AJ here, what's up?" AJ asked, looking down at Lance, he could feel the
other man starting to relax.

"Get Lance out of there now!!" Chris whispered into the phone, his voice
making it clear that it was urgent.

AJ slammed the phone down and looked at Lance wondering how he was going to
break the news that JC knew where Lance was, he knew Lance would start
panicking once he heard the truth.

"Lance, we need to get dressed. Chris found us somewhere to stay until we've
got JC out of the way." AJ said his voice soft, as he waited for Lance to
process what he had just said.

Lance quickly got out of bed and pulled on the clothes AJ had given him that
morning. From the way AJ was acting, Lance knew they had to get out of here
soon. As Lance was dressing, AJ stuffed all his clothes into a bag and
quickly changed. Throwing Lance a hat and a pair of sunglasses, AJ put on a
baseball cap and took a quick look around the room. Grabbing his mobile, AJ
took Lance's hand and squeezing gently walked over to the door.

AJ took a brief look down the corridor and certain the coast was clear
walked down towards the stairs, still holding Lance's hand. As soon as they
reached the stairs the pair walked down to the ground floor as fast as
possible. Letting go of the younger man's hand, AJ walked out of the hotel,
Lance just seconds behind.

Lance wondered just what the plan was now, they were out of the hotel but
how where they supposed to run away without being spotted. He watched as AJ
hailed a cab and gently ushered Lance inside, looking around before getting
in himself.

"Take us to the nearest car rental place as fast as you can." AJ said before
looking at his companion.

Lance looked tired and scared, AJ almost cried when he saw the way Lance was
shaking. Uncaring of what the cabbie might think, AJ took Lance's hand in
his, rubbing his thumb over the other man's hand.

"Where are we going, Alex?" Lance asked not wanting to say AJ's name in case
the cabbie recognised it.

"I've got a cabin that I haven't told the others about. We can stay there
until we hear from the others." AJ replied knowing that Lance needed to know
the plan and have some control in his life.

The cab pulled up outside the airport with a loud screech, AJ paid the
driver and got out, holding Lance's hand the whole time. He wasn't sure if
it was an attempt to comfort Lance or himself. Walking over to the ATM, AJ
called up his account and withdrew enough cash to hire a car and to buy
supplies once they arrived at their destination.

"I'd like to rent a car please." AJ asked, flashing a quick smile.

"Of course Sir. Would that be cash or credit card? ?" She replied, sounding
annoyingly perky.

"Cash" AJ answered, signing the forms Alex Richards. This way there would be
harder for anyone to find them, including the press.

Title: Black Eyes, Blue Tears 5/?
Author: Stephanie M wicciangirl51@hotmail.com
Summary: AJ discovers the truth behind Lance and JC's intense relationship.
Feedback: This is not my normal type of story; I would love to hear what
everyone thinks.
Disclaimer: This is entirely fiction i.e. not true. I don't know Nsync or
the Backstreet Boys.
Warnings: JC bashing-sorry if that upsets anyone. Discussion of abuse

Part 5

"It's okay, Lance. No one is going to find us; I signed the forms Alex
Richards. No one would think of using it apart from maybe Howie and he won't
tell anyone." AJ said as he fastened his seatbelt, looking over at Lance who
was tapping his fingers on his dashboard. Lance looked okay, AJ thought to
himself, or as okay as he was going to be with JC around.

"Why Alex Richards?" Lance asked, willing himself to relax now that he knew
it would be harder for JC to find him.

"It was an old alias I used a couple of times whenever I wanted to be just
me for a while. I finally realised that I needed another name if I was going
to hide-McLean was too noticeable. Howie suggested that I simply use on of
the others surnames' I thought was too obvious and picked Richards, Kevin is
like the dad of the group." AJ replied as he pulled the car out into the
traffic, he knew their route off by heart and was positive that it would be
safe for a while.

Four hours later they arrived, at a small grocery store, knowing he didn't
have any food left in cabin AJ stopped the car and asked Lance if he wanted
to wait. Lance looked terrified at the possibility of being left alone and
AJ wanted nothing more to find some wall to hit, how could he have even
thought about leaving Lance alone?

As they walked inside a tall, Chinese woman said, "Hi, Alex. Is this your
man, then?"

"Nah, he's too good for me. Lia this is Lance, one of my best friends." AJ
said with a smile, he caught sight of the surprise on Lance's face at what
he had said.

"Good to meet you, Lance. If you ever need anything just see me, any friend
of Alex's is a friend of mine. Although I don't know how you can put up with
this, idiot." Lia replied kindly, nudging AJ as she finished speaking.

"N..Nice to meet you Lia, do you live around here?" Lance said calming as he
noticed that AJ wasn't going to leave him alone. Although he felt
comfortable with Lia he didn't like being alone in case JC found him again.
Despite what AJ had said, and what he knew rationally the fear of JC finding
him was all too real.

"Just down the street, how long are you guys staying here?" Lia said as she
passed AJ a basket.

"Haven't decided yet, I just remembered we needed supplies and figured it
would be easier to get them now rather than having to rush later." AJ said
with a smile.

"I'll leave you to your shopping, just remember to see me before you leave."
Lia said as she walked over to the counter where a small queue was waiting.

As she left Lance let out an unneeded breath. It wasn't that he didn't like
Lia she seemed nice he was just uncomfortable around people, he was not used
to people being nice to him.

"Anything special you want?" AJ asked as he walked down the aisle, throwing
food in the basket, figuring that some foods everyone liked. Grabbing a
couple of medical supplies, AJ wondered how was going to ask Lance to let
him take care of the cuts and scratches that covered the younger man's back.

"I'll eat almost everything" Lance said with a shrug, grabbing food from the
shelves and placing it into the basket.

The pair quickly finished shopping and walked over to the checkout, where
Lia quickly packed up their food, smiling at the way Lance was insisting he
should pay for half and AJ was ignoring him.

"That's $60, I guess you needed more than you thought. Have a nice
vacation." Lia said as AJ paid her and guided Lance out the store, each one
had their arms full of bags of food.

"Lance, you okay?" AJ asked, alarmed at how quiet Lance had been since they
had stopped at the store.

"I'm okay, I was just thinking." Lance said offering a small smile, turning
to watch the world race by as AJ weaved down the roads.

"We're here. It's not much but its perfect for escaping." AJ said as he
parked the car outside a log cabin, half hidden by the large trees.

Lance quickly unfastened the seatbelt and got out the car, eager to see
where he would be spending the next few days or weeks. As AJ opened the
door, Lance walked inside and looked around.

In the middle of the lounge was a beautiful log fire. The couch was black
leather, matching the two armchairs. In the corner sat a large TV, and DVD
player. Lance quickly headed for the bedrooms, wanting to get the feel of
the place.

"This is your room, mine is just next door." AJ said, realising that he had
forgotten to pick up some clothes for Lance to wear. He knew that for the
time being, Lance could wear his clothes and they could go shopping the next
day.

"Its nice, any reason why it's decorated in greens?" Lance asked, absently
noticing the dream catcher above the bed.

"There are five bedrooms, each one is in a different colour. My bedroom is
in red, mainly because I like the colour red. The other rooms are decorated
in yellow, blue and silver. I picked colours I liked the most for each
bedroom." AJ said thoughtfully. He just hoped that Lance liked the room; he
wanted Lance to feel safe with him.

"It's a nice dream catcher." Lance said, his voice clearly asking the
question why did AJ have dream-catchers?

"They're in every bedroom, I have a lot of nightmares and figured it would
be easier to put them in each room, rather than lugging mine around with
me." AJ said, hoping that Lance wouldn't have any more nightmares. AJ wanted
to ask Lance if the other man would sleep in his room with him, so that he
could make sure he was protecting Lance. He felt like the only thing that
mattered was that Lance was safe, AJ knew that he would be worried whenever
Lance wasn't with him.

"Are you going to call Chris and tell him where we are?" Lance asked, having
realised that Chris and the others probably had no idea where they had
disappeared. AJ had said that Chris had found somewhere for them to hideout
but it was obvious that no one knew about the cabin from what AJ had said.

"I will after." AJ replied evasively, he was going to put of calling the
others as long as he could, the less people who knew their location the less
chance of JC catching them.

"Do you want some help to get the stuff out the car?" Lance asked as he
realised just how much stuff they had with them.

"Sure, but there isn't much really." AJ said with a small smile, he normally
brought a lot more just for himself.

The pair quickly walked out to the car, AJ passed a few of the lighter bags
to Lance. He had seen the injuries Lance had and wasn't going to let the
other man hurt himself. Lance of course, knew what AJ was doing but found it
sweet; no one else had ever been so worried about him apart from his mom.

As AJ carried the last bag into the kitchen there was a loud high-pitched
ringing. AJ quickly looked around for his phone, smiling in thanks when
Lance passed it to him.

"Hey, Howie." AJ said in greeting as he started putting the food away.

"The press know Lance was in your room last night and JC's on the warpath."
Howie said soothingly, he knew AJ was going to blow when he heard
everything.

"How did they find out!?" AJ asked a mix of anger and confusion in his
voice.

"The guy who took breakfast up your room went to the press. Nsync has
cancelled the rest of the tour, saying that Lance is ill. We've got a press
conference in two hours." Howie said knowing that he had to keep AJ in the
loop.

"Anything else you need to tell me (?)" AJ asked sarcastically.

"Oh yeah, there are photos of you and Lance leaving the hotel together. Wait
a sec, Chris wants to talk to you..." Howie said the phone going silent.

"AJ, you better take care of Lance." Chris said, the threat clear.

"Don't worry we're okay. Come up with any ideas what we're doing about JC
yet?" AJ asked, not liking the fact that JC was still loose.

"Yeah, but it depends on Lance talking to the police. Johnny said that we
might be able to get the records sealed so that no one finds out." Chris
replied remembering Lance's fear that everyone would find out about the
years of abuse.

"I'll talk to him and see what happens. Does JC have any idea that we know
what he's being doing to Lance?" AJ said, looking around for Lance, shocked
to find the younger man was asleep in front of the fire.

"No, he thinks you kidnapped Lance. You going to tell us where you are?"
Chris said a smile in his voice.

"No, that way there's no chance of JC finding out." AJ said as he ended the
call.

Title: Black Eyes, Blue Tears 6/?
Author: Stephanie M wicciangirl51@hotmail.com
Summary: AJ discovers the truth behind Lance and JC's intense relationship.
Feedback: This is not my normal type of story; I would love to hear what
everyone thinks.
Disclaimer: This is entirely fiction i.e. not true. I don't know Nsync or
the Backstreet Boys.
Warnings: JC bashing-sorry if that upsets anyone. Discussion of abuse

Part 6

AJ gently picked up the exhausted Lance and placed the younger man on the
couch, covering him with a cream throw from the closet. He knew that he had
to tell Lance about what the others had said but figured it could wait.
Lance needed to rest properly, knowing that he was away from JC.

AJ sat down on the armchair opposite Lance and just looked at the younger
man. A part of his mind acknowledged the fact that he was falling hard for
Lance but he knew that didn't matter. The most important thing was to get JC
out of the way, far away from Lance.

Standing AJ shook himself out of his daze and opened his bag, looking for
some clothes that Lance could wear. Picking out some of his less outrageous
clothes he placed them to one side. An hour later he had sorted the clothes
out into definite and maybe.

Looking at his watch, AJ was surprised to see that it was three pm, no
wonder his stomach was screaming for food, the last time he'd eaten was at
six fifteen that morning. He walked over to the kitchen and started to work,
forty minutes later the soup was simmering gently.

"Lance, time to wake up." AJ said into Lance's ear as he gently ran his
fingers through Lance's hair, for some reason he couldn't stop touching the
younger man's hair.

"What's the great smell?" Lance asked groggily as he awoke, to the strange
feeling of safety.

"Lunch, its only soup but I figured you might be hungry." AJ said as he
walked out to the kitchen, putting the food out.

"Thanks." Lance called after AJ as he ran a hand over his face trying to
wake himself up.

AJ carried two bowls of food into the dining room, where Lance was waiting
eagerly. The younger man felt like he hadn't eaten in days, despite the fact
that they had breakfast that morning.

"This is great." Lance said, as he tasted the steaming soup, it had always
been a comfort food for him.

"Lance, I need to talk to you about pressing charges. We can get the judge
to seal the records and probably get courtroom sealed as well so that the
press can't get in. So no one would find out unless you told them." AJ said
soothingly, not mentioning the fact that JC knew Lance was with him or that
the press seemed to think they were dating.

"Honest?" Lance questioned, ignoring the shakes wracking his body.

"I wouldn't lie to you about this, Lance. Want to watch a movie?" AJ said as
he picked up the two bowls and took them out into the kitchen.

Lance followed just a few seconds later, he didn't like being alone.
Whenever he was alone, Lance couldn't help but feel afraid that JC was going
to find him and punish him.

"Yeah, that'd be nice. Want me to dry?" Lance said as AJ quickly washed the
dishes.

"We can leave them to drain. Lance, would it be okay if I cleaned your back?
Some of the cuts look pretty deep and I don't want them to get infected." AJ
said, gently as he turned to look at Lance.

"I.. I guess. The bedroom, okay?" Lance said, in shock. He didn't really
want anyone to touch him, he felt too dirty. If it would make AJ feel
better, he'd let the older man clean his wounds.

"Yeah, I'll just grab the first aid kit." AJ replied, taking the box from
its place on the wall.
*******
Lance quickly took off his top and lay down on the bed, unable to suppress
his shudder of fear. He didn't like being so exposed and vulnerable. He kept
repeating his mantra in his head, `this is AJ not JC. AJ won't hurt me'

AJ reverently washed Lance's back, taking care not to hurt the obviously
scared man anymore. Taking the ointment from its packet, he massaged the
cool cream onto Lance's inflamed back.

AJ took the antiseptic spray from its packet and placed it on the cut, there
was a deep cut on Lance's side that appeared to have been made by a whip of
some sort. He dressed the wound, and moved off the bed, letting Lance turn
over to look at him.

"Does anywhere else hurt?" AJ asked gently, he didn't want to frighten Lance
anymore than he already had.

"On.. On my thigh, JC cuts them sometimes." Lance said, looking down in
shame.

"I'll have to have a look at them, I won't hurt you Lance." AJ said, seeing
the shame in Lance's face.

Wordlessly Lance unfastened his pants, dropping them to the floor with his
underwear. He lay back down on the bed, staring up at the ceiling, not
wanting to see the anger on AJ's face.

Lance shivered, as AJ gently cleaned his thighs, he was amazed that AJ was
even touching him there. A small tear rolled down his face as the thought
crossed his mind; no one had ever touched him like that before.

AJ swallowed audibly before saying, "They don't look too deep, thank god.
I'm just going to put some antiseptic spray on them, it might sting a
little."

As AJ left the room, to let Lance dress in private, He heard Lance whisper
softly, "Thanks for helping me, AJ."

`I'd do anything for you, Lance' AJ thought to himself as he returned to the
lounge, hunting through the DVDs for a suitable movie.