Dare to Dream
By: L.D. Griffin
This story is purely fictional. I do not know *NSYNC. This is not implying anything about *NSYNC's true sexuality. I do not know if they are gay or not. Do not read this if you are under 18 or it is illegal in your state to read literature with homosexual content.
"Well, maybe I can be a little service to your need," JC told Justin, sounding extremely sexy.
"What do you mean by..."Justin couldn't finish his sentence as he felt JC do what he promised.
"Oh, Josh...yes, yes, yes...oh god...uh...uh...JOSH!!!!!" Justin's eyes flew open as he realized it had only been a dream.
He looked around the room, noticing the other person's chest rising and falling as he breathed steadily.
`Oh God' he thought `That was the most intense dream I've ever had. Hopefully I didn't yell or say anything out loud; Josh would hate me if he found out. He wouldn't want a gay best friend. Well, he's sleeping soundly so that means I didn't wake him up'
Justin's mind raced with the thoughts of the dream he had just encountered. He knew how he felt about JC, the only thing was he didn't know if he was gay or not. He wasn't attracted to any girls, but he wasn't attracted to any other guys either, just JC. Did that make him gay? Or was he a one-person lover? He didn't know. All he knew was that he was getting hard just watching his soul mate sleep, and that he wanted JC badly.
The intense concentration on JC's chest forced him to not realize that JC had awoken to the feeling of someone watching him intently. He didn't want to turn his head to see who it was because he knew who it was, and he didn't want to get all of his hopes up hoping that Justin was staring at him the way he'd stared at Justin for the last eight years.
As JC's chest started to rise and fall less evenly, Justin looked up at JC's face. On contact he realized JC was awake, and hoped he hadn't been for long.
"Good evening, how long have I been asleep?" JC asked, as he sat up.
"I don't know...you weren't asleep when I fell into dreamland. Oh, by the way who was on the phone?"
"Huh...oh yeah. I have to go to LA for three days. I'm guest hosting "Disney's Wonderful World of Disney". I asked Johnny and Management if you could come with me, but Johnny told me that "if I was ever going to have a solo career I had to start doing things on my own" and "The poll said you, not you and Justin". I wanted to strangle him. Then when I told him I was going to decline the offer because they weren't letting me bring you along, he said I couldn't because his secretary had already confirmed the offer. So, I'm stuck. God, sometimes I hate him."
"You're going to LA...for three days...by yourself?" Justin asked, soundly a little upset.
"Yeah, I'm so sorry. I know it's our only week off, and I wanted to get to hang out with you, but Melinda's here. You'll have lots of fun with her," JC said, not believing what had just come out of his mouth.
"Melinda's not you, JC. She's my best female friend but she's not my best friend. She's not the one who I can tell anything to, like I can with you!" Justin said, not telling him the real reason he didn't want him to leave.
The truth was, when JC was gone...Justin was miserable. He was as gloomy as the sun on a cloudy, overcast day. He felt like a little lost puppy wanting in from the rain. He needed JC to shelter him; he needed Josh to be there for him. He knew it was selfish, but for some reason, he didn't care. Josh had always been there before, and the more often JC was gone lately, the more it almost convinced Justin to confess to JC his feelings. But the thought that JC would turn and run, never to look back kept Justin from admitting them.
"Justin, are you okay? You look a little dazed?"
"Yeah...I'm fine...I'm just mad at Johnny for forcing you to do something you didn't want to do. Sometimes, he's a little too aggressive. I mean, why should it be his choice anyway? You're the one doing the show, but..."Justin started but was interrupted by a knock at the door.
"Who is it?" JC yelled at the top of his lungs.
"It's Melinda, can I come in?"
"Yeah, just a sec," Justin said getting up off his bed, and walking to the door.
"Whatcha need?" Justin said, sleepily.
"Oh, I just wanted to give JC this ticket Johnny dropped off at our room. He was here about an hour ago, but you all were asleep. He didn't want to wake you, so he left it with me," Melinda said as she held out a ticket to Justin.
"Oh, thanks...anything else? We're still kind of tired. I think we'll stay in tonight. I mean, I'm not going to see Josh for three whole days, and I want to spend my time with him," Justin said, slightly blushing but not enough to be obvious.
At the sound of that comment, Melinda gave a small nod of her head and an angry "no" and left the doorframe, heading straight for her room. Once there, she angrily took out her key from her pocket, and stuffed it into the lock. As soon as she was inside, she sat down on the edge of her bed and screamed at the top of her lungs.
"Okay, Melinda, think fast. JC's leaving tomorrow for LA. He'll be gone for three days. You've got three days to really start bringing Justin back to total straightness. What are you going to do?" Melinda said to herself, breathing heavily.
`Well, I'll just have to turn my charm `o' meter up to total hottie,' she thought as she lie back on her bed.
"What was wrong with her? I mean she seemed mad all of a sudden," Justin started as he walked over to JC and handed him the ticket.
"I don't know...PMS maybe?" JC said with a slight chuckle.
"Come on Jace, be serious. She sounded and looked really angry. Was it something I said?"
"Well, you know Melinda. Anything can tick her off. Though, I didn't hear you say anything but that you and I were still tired, and that we were going to stay in tonight. I don't see how she could have taken offense to either of those comments."
"Well...whatever it was I said, I'm going to go apologize," Justin said as he again got up off of the twin bed, and headed for the door.
As soon as JC heard the sound of the lock click into place, he picked up the ticket. It read:
Flight 1897 to Los Angles, California from New York, New York
January 29, 2001, 7:00 AM
`Great,' JC thought. `I'll be gone over his birthday...he's going to hate me. I've never missed his birthday before, oh god how I wish I could give him the birthday gift I'd love to give him, but he'd never forgive me. I'd be the worst creature on earth to him. How much longer can I keep this masquerade up?'
Before JC could finish his thoughts, there was a knock at the door.
"Who is it?" JC asked half heartedly, as he got up and went to the door.
"Oh, hey Lance. What's up?" JC asked once he reached the door.
"Nothing, just thought I'd see what you were up to. I see you're all packed."
"Yep, everything's set. I leave at 7:00 AM tomorrow morning."
"When do you get back?"
"Monday, Feb. 1"
"You mean you're going to miss Justin's birthday?"
"Yeah, I know...but what am I supposed to do? Johnny's making me do this. I told him I didn't want to without ya'll but no, I get the stupid "Solo Career" talk. Like I haven't heard that a million times before."
"Well, Justin's going to take that pretty hard. Have you ever missed a birthday before?"
"Nope, this'll be the first."
"Oh dear. Well at least Melinda's here. That should help a little bit," Lance looked up at JC and stared into his eyes with a deep concern.
"Yeah, at least Melinda's here," JC answered.
"Hello? Melinda, are you in there?" Justin asked from the hallway outside Room 818.
"Yeah...just as sec," Melinda said as she quickly tidied up a bit, and ran to open the door.
"Hey, whatcha need?"
"I just wanted to know if you were okay. I mean you left JC's and I's room really fast, and you looked mad and I wanted to apologize for anything I said that you could of taken offense too."
"Naw...I'm not mad, I just left in a rush I guess. I didn't mean to make you think you did something wrong," Melinda tried to justify her actions as best as she could, lying hidden through her teeth.
"Okay, I just wanted to make sure. So what are you doing tonight?"
"Nothing really, I think I'm going to stay in like you and JC. I'm a little tired too."
"Okay, well you know where to find me if you need anything," Justin said, flashing one of his million-dollar smiles.
"Sure, I'll let you know if something's up. Goodnight, Just. Love ya'"
"Love ya too, Mel."
For the past 14 years now, they always told each other they loved the other one. They loved each other like a brother and sister would, nothing more. Yet, Melinda was going to try everything in her power to convince Justin that she felt a little more for him than just a sister/brother type of love. She wanted him to think that she was head over heels.
`If he really loves me,' she thought, `he'll become straight again."
Justin walked into the hotel room to find his band mate shaking with chills as he slept because the window was slightly open. The frigid, harsh winter air was coming into the room making the temperature much too cold for any person to stand. Justin walked over to the pane, closed it, and set down on the bed next to JC.
`Oh Josh,' he thought, `Why can't you love me back the way I love you. Why can't you and I be lovers? . Why can't you give me what I really want for my birthday? I want you, josh, and nothing more. Why can't I just be normal, and fall in love with someone like Melinda. She's a pretty girl, and she's been my best female friend since I was three. Why can't I be attracted to her?
He knew the answer all to well but decided against concentrating any harder on it. He changed into his pajamas, and pulled down the covers. The last conscious thoughts he had were on what was he going to do with himself.
JC arose the next morning at 4:30 AM. His plane left the gate at 7:00 that morning, so he had to hurry and get ready. Once dressed, he leaned over the other twin bed, and tried to wake up Justin.
"Justin, wake up buddy."
"Huh, what time is it?" A groggy Justin asked as he turned over onto his stomach.
"It's 5:00 AM. I've got to leave for the airport. Do you want to come with me?"
"Don't worry Mom, I'll buy my lunch," Justin said as he fell back to sleep.
"I'll take that as a no," JC said as he got up and proceeded to leave a note for Justin so he didn't freak when he really woke up.
I'm leaving for the airport now. I tried to wake you up, but you weren't ready, so I'm writing this note to tell you that's where I am. Hope you have an absolutely marvelous birthday. I'm so sorry I'm going to miss it. When I get back the guys and I are going to throw you a HUGE party, so don't get to partied out on Sunday night. Watch for me on The Wonderful World of Disney. Not to mention the fact we're showing Model Behavior. So, I'll see you Monday morning bright and early I promise!
JC placed the note on top of Justin's suitcase, and grabbed his own bag. He turned around right before he headed out the door, and stared at Justin for a minute.
"I love you," he whispered as he softly pulled the door to.
Well, that's Chapter 3. What's going to happen while JC's gone? Is Melinda going to try anything really stupid and end up getting herself in deep shit? Watch same time, same channel. Thanks again to Cody, for being my personal writing advisor. And of course thanks to my best friend, Lindsey, for helping me discover fan fiction writing to begin with. Please keep e-mailing me with your comments, suggestions, and/or criticism. I love to hear from ya'll!!!