Date: Tue, 6 Jun 2000 02:28:28 -0700 (PDT) From: Jay Chords Subject: Deceiving Secrets - 8 Hi. Well, the response from Chapter 7 was phenominal and was incredibly mixed. Some are dieing to read this chapter and others are appauled at how Kevin has become 'evil'. *grin* Thanks! I hope though, that it doesn't totally turn you off and you decide to stop reading this story. EEK! But, if your reading this, I hope your willing to see what else I've got up my sleeve. Disclaimer: *snooooooooooooooooooooooze* *groan* ooohhhhhhhhhhh lance *grin* haha, I'm odd, yes. Um, you know the disclaimer you know the warning. you know if you should be here. Send any comments, questions, or hateful letters to : chords4@yahoo.com eNjOy! -Jay Chapter 8 "What the hell is wrong with you?" Brian was screaming at his cousin. Never, would you see something like this taking place. Sweet, innocent little Brian never lashed out. "Grow up, Brian," Kevin scoffed. AJ grabbed Kevin by the collar of his shirt, glaring deeply into the man's soul. "You God Damned fucker," he hissed. "How could you? We were together for three years, three years! Didn't that mean a damn thing to you?" "Of course it did! Why do you think I proposed?" "Then why the fuck did you cheat on me? Why'd you start going out with Jay?" "Because Jeremy was different. He was new." AJ dropped his grip from Kevin's throat. He pulled the ring vigorously off his finger. "You can just forget about a wedding. You can forget about those three years. As far as I'm concerned, you don't even exist!" AJ growled, walked over to the window and threw the ring into the hard breeze. Kevin stood with his mouth open as he watched his former fiance leave the room. "Alex," he whispered, falling onto the couch, his head in his hands. "Mom," Jeremy was sitting next to his mother's hospital bed. He was holding her hand. "Everything is going to be okay." Teresa Gavitts eyes opened slightly. "I love you Jeremy. Don't ever forget that. I-I'm sorry I," she started coughing. "Shh. Mom, don't talk. Please." She shook her head. "No, I have to say this," her voice was hoarse and raspy. "I'm sorry I, that I said you weren't really my son when you told me you were gay." Jeremy winced, remembering the moment. "It's okay, Mom. I understand." "Honey, I was wrong. I'm sorry and I'm happy for you. I'm glad that you were able to be honest with me and if you had to be with a man, I'm glad it's Chad." Jeremy smiled at his mother, a tear sliding down both of their cheeks. "Thanks, Mom." Her eyes closed as the heart monitor let out one monotone note. "Mom?" he shook her slightly. "MOM?!" "Mom, Mom, don't leave me!" Jeremy was tossing and turning on the couch. The blanket Mica had covered him with was bunched up between the cushions. "Jay, Jay. Wake up." Jeremy bolted up, tears streaming down his face. He looked at Mica and began to sob. "It's okay, Jay," she hugged him close to her. "Everything is going to be fine." "No it's not! He played me, Mica. He played me like a fucking fool." Mica was silent. She didn't know what to say. She didn't know that Kevin and AJ were a couple. She didn't know that Kevin would break her best friend's heart. "I'm sorry, Jay," she finally found her voice. "I'm so sorry." Jeremy sniffled and wiped his eyes gingerly. "You didn't do anything wrong. It's all Kevin and I hate that ass hole. He can rot in hell." AJ was pacing back and forth in his room. He was trying to keep himself from crying. He wouldn't. He wouldn't let Kevin ruin his life. Sure, they had had a three-year relationship. Sure, he was going to be Mr. Kevin Scott Richardson and Kevin was going to be Mr. Alexander James McLean. Sure, life had been perfect. "Damn you Kevin!" he pounded his fists into a pillow. The muffled response only made him angrier as the stuffing soon began to flutter around him. He grabbed the mangled item and threw it against the wall before falling onto his bed and sobbing silently. Days had passed. Jeremy moped continuously. Mica couldn't cheer him up no matter how much she tried, he just shied away from her. Honestly, she was worried about him. She couldn't get him to eat anything. She was watching her best friend waste away before her eyes. She wouldn't admit it, but she cried herself to sleep every night after she made sure that Jeremy was asleep. She had taken it upon herself to watch over him. She'd moved her things into his house and became his 24-hour nurse. Her own saving grace were the calls from Brian. He would call and check up on both of them. This allowed Mica to get her worries out in the open. She found herself falling hopelessly in love with Brian but would dismiss the thought as quickly as it came. The phone rang through the house. Mica wasn't home to pick it up so he had to. "Hello?" "Jay? It's Nick. How's it going?" Jeremy sighed and hung up the phone. He didn't want to speak to any of them. No one associated with Kevin. The name alone made him burst into tears. He stared down at himself. He was so thin. His boxers practically slid off his hips. He swallowed around the lump in his throat when he would look at his calves. So many cuts. He was disgusted with himself. The little pocketknife had become his best friend. He wiped away the tears that were building in the corner of his eyes as the phone rang for a second time. Jeremy pulled his legs to his chest. He fumbled around and killed the ringer. He fell against the pillows on his bed and pulled the blankets tightly around his fragile and sickly form. Never again would he let himself fall in love. "Never again," he repeated aloud. Nick watched as everything fell apart around him. He was deeply worried that the brutal break up between his best friends would break up the group but more importantly, would break up their friendship. He didn't want to have to choose sides between AJ and Kevin. Of course he thought what Kevin did was wrong and disgusting, but he was only human, right? Kevin was only human. He still felt anger toward the older band member though. Killing AJ's hopes of having a wedding and hurting Jeremy. There was a light knock on his door. "Come in." Brian stuck his head in. "Hey Nicky, how you holding up?" Nick shrugged. "I dunno. I'm worried about AJ and Jeremy." "Yeah, Howie and I just checked on him. He's not doing to well. Jeremy's not doing good either. Mica said he hasn't been eating anything." "Fuck." "You can say that again." "This is so screwed up Bri. AJ and Kev can barely be in the same room with each other, especially when we're on the bus and we're all stuck with deciding who we wanna be 'loyal' to. This is so damn fucked up!" the teen hollered. "I know. I know." Mica fed Atchika who gratefully licked her hand before devouring her meal. "At least someone in this house is eating," she grumbled before walked up the stairs to Jeremy's room. "Jay? You awake?" no answer. She sighed and walked back down to the living room. She didn't know what to do. She felt so helpless. She walked into a small room near the deck. A piano was the only item in the room along with a stool. She sat down and let her fingers glide along the keys. Her voice carried through the room. Why was everything falling apart? A tear slid down her cheek as she played. "I told you you should've been a singer," Jeremy's voice called out to her. She stopped and looked up. He was clad in pajama pants and a tee shirt. His eyes were so sad, so empty, so lonely. "Yeah, but I couldn't leave you behind." He grinned and sat down next to her on the bench. "Sing for me, please?" She sighed and started to play again. Close your eyes, Make a wish, And remember my kiss, Say good-bye and sweet dreams, Things aren't what they seem. You have to say good-bye, Sometimes in this life, Sometimes it'll last for a long or short while, But just remember, Good-bye's can never last forever. Take my hand, Hold it tight, And remember this night, Sit by me, Under this tree, And we'll make a memory. You have to say good-bye, Sometimes in this life, Sometimes it'll last for a long or short while, But just remember, Good-bye's can never last forever. (Words and music by: Becca Calabrese. Dedicated to the memory of Gabriel.) Mica looked down at Jeremy who was leaning against her shoulder with tears streaming down his pale cheeks. "I miss him, Mica," he croaked. She stroked his hair, letting it fall between her fingers. "I know you do, Jay." He sighed. "How can I fall for someone so quickly?" "Could he have been a rebound off of Chad?" she asked. He cringed. "Maybe. I still miss him though. Both of them," he whispered. She sighed, kissed the top of his head, and kept stroking his hair. "It'll get easier, honey. I promise. Someday, you're gonna find the perfect man for you. Someone who'll bend over backwards for you, no pun intended, someone who'll wait up until you come home at night, someone who you can have children with, someone who'll cook." Jeremy grinned. "Heaven knows I need someone who can cook." The two giggled. "Come on, I'll make you some hot cocoa." I know, this one is very....blah, I guess you could say. Don't worry, 9 will be coming soon and is more interesting and longer too. I hope to hear from you : chords4@yahoo.com