Date: Tue, 12 Oct 1999 17:37:43 +1000 From: Jason Subject: " Finding Love" Part 6 By: Jinray Okay. Heres the next part. Thanks to everyone who reads my story, Luv ya! Reminder: This story is completely from my imagination and in no way implies that anyone mentioned is gay. So, lighten up. "Finding Love" Part6 By: Jinray All through the ride to the beach I just stared out the window. The cab driver tried to start a conversation, but I really wasn't in the mood for talking. All I could think about was how Brian broke my heart. I thought he was this kind, gentle, sincere person whom I could trust and love. Instead, he ended up to be someone I never want to see again. I know Brian wasn't in his right mind when he violated me but it still hurt me inside. " Sir, were here..." "Sir..Sir!" " Huh?...Oh, i'm sorry..h...how much will that be?" I said taking out my wallet. " It's on the house. You look like you could use a break." The driver smiled. " Really...Thanks" I quickly shook his hand thanked him again. The beach was really crowded, and I didn't feel up to being around a lot of people. So I just walked a long ways on the sand until there was less and less people. Then, there was no one in sight. I heard some people talking, but where was it coming from? Walking around a giant rock, I found my answer. There were cameras set up everywhere, all snapping away at these five gorgeous men. The one with bright red hair saw me and asked out loud, " Who's that?" As he pointed to me and everyone turned to look, I ran back around the rock and slowly walked back. I felt like someone was watching me the whole time so I turned. This gorgeous guy was standing on top of the rock was watching me walk. Then, his gorgeous light blue eyes sparkled from the sunlight. I quickly turned back around and walked faster, thinking that I was in trouble for intruding on their photo shoot. I decided on walking back to the apartment, I didn't care how long it would take. While crossing the street something caught my eye. It was the cafe or something, and music was coming out every time someone opened the doors. Curiosity got the best of me and I was soon inside sitting at a table in the darkest section of the room. People just sat and talked and every once in a while someone would get up and sing. I thought that this place was amazing. I must have stayed for about three hours just listening to the music, before deciding on leaving. Upon leaving I noticed this brightly colored paper on the table. I picked it up and read it: HELP WANTED: Singer who could perform three times a week. $50 a night. Auditions start tomorrow at 8 AM. Wow. I could do this. I don't really like singing in front of people, but something told me that it would be good for me. I thought about it more and decided on auditioning tomorrow. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- -------------------------- The Next Day ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- -------------------------- I awoke, took a shower, and got dressed quickly. I was so nervous that I couldn't control myself. I had to keep moving around. A lot of people might be auditioning, so I left to get there early. Boy was I surprised. No one was there. 'Maybe I missed the audition or maybe they found who they wanted already?' I kept thinking to myself. As an excuse for the fear and nervousness of singing in front of people, I turned around to walk back to the apartment. When someone tapped my shoulder. " Are you here for the audition?" " Y..Yes." I said kicking myself for not walking faster. " Good. Come on in." The man motioned me to follow him. " So, let's get down to business. My name is Joseph, but please call me Joe. And you are..." Joe extended his hand out to me. " Jason. Nice to meet you Joe." I said while shaking his hand. I looked around the empty room and asked, " Where is everyone else? Am I the only one auditioning?" " Yup. Is that a problem?" " No, it's just that a lot of people performed last night...so I figured..." " Oh, last night was free performance night. If anyone wanted to sing, they were welcomed to get up and rock the house." Joe smiled " Oh. So, what do I do first?" I asked nervously. " Well, since your the only one auditioning, I'll see you at eight tonight. I'll decide if you get the job after your performance." " Okay, so I'll see you at eight then." With that, I left and walked back to the apartment. ' Boy, all this walking is going to make me look good.', I laughed to myself. Upon reaching my door, someone yelled my name, " Jay!" I turned to see Nick running towards me. Before I could say anything he gave me one of his death hugs. " Nick. Nice to see you. How'd you know where I was staying?" " Kev told me. Listen Jay, I'm so sorry for what happened with Brian." " That's ok Nick, let's go inside huh. The neighbors might here." I motioned nick in. " So, hungry?" " You bet. What are you going to make?" Nick asked with excitement. " Pleease. You aint special enough to eat my cookin'. Were going out to eat, my treat." I said, which earned me a playful punch and a smile from Nick. " Are you sure? I mean I could pay for it..." Nick said. " If you don't let me treat you, then i'm going to show the world that little accident that happened back in North carolina...remember mayonnaise, honey, tape, AJ screaming.." I laughed. " And how are you going to do that?" I walked into the room and came out. " With this." Nicks jaw dropped. " Yes, Kev and I taped the whoooole thing. So the way I see it, I have you in the palm of my hand." " Alright...Alright You got me. So where are we going?" Nick submitted. " Hmmm. I feel like pizza." I said knowing that it was Nick's favorite. We hopped into Nick's car and drove to the mall. Nick said that there was a great pizza parlor there. As Nick was parking my cell rang. " Hello?" I answered " Jay! How are you man?" " Hey Kevin! I'm doing better." " You know, you should give Nick a call, instead of sitting at home doin' nothing. I'm s......." " Actually Kev Nick and I are at the mall right now. Were going to grab a bite to eat." I smiled at Nick. " Oh. Cool. I've gotta go. See you when I get back." " Okay, Bye Kev." I flipped the phone shut and turned to Nick who was staring at me. " What?" " Nothing. I was just thinking of how you seem to rub off on Kev and I. Especially Kev, he really cares for you." Nick looked at me and smiled. " Okay. That was really sweet n' stuff but I haven't eaten anything since lunch yesterday, so let's go already." I laughed as I jumped out of the car. Nick and I had a very pleasant lunch and walked around the mall talking. Expecting it to happen sooner or later, we ended up in a game room. We played every single game in the entire room, and Nick kicked my ass in everyone. " Oh Shit!" I yelled " What..what's wrong" " I have a show tonight. I'll explain later..can you take me there?" " Sure let's go." We got their five minutes before eight. I asked Nick to come in for support, which he gladly did. I was nervous as hell. My palms were sweaty and my whole body was shaking violently. Joe pushed me up on the stage. The lights dimmed and the spotlight was on me. I looked out to the crowd, it wasn't nearly as crowded as the night before; but I didn't care. I was going to give these people a good show. I whispered my selection to the band and the music started. All the nervousness left me and I just closed my eyes and sang... An old man turned ninety- eight He won the lottery and died the next day It's a black fly in your Chardonnay It's a death row pardon two minutes too late Isn't it Ironic......don't you think It's like rain on your wedding day It's a free ride when your already paid It's the good advice that you just didn't take And Who would've thought .....it figures Mr. Play It Safe was afraid to fly He packed his suitcase and kissed his kids good bye He waited his whole damn life to take that flight And as the plane crashed down he thought " Well isn't this nice...." And isn't it ironic.....don't you think Chorus A traffic jam when you're already late A no- smoking sign on your cigarette break It's like ten thousand spoons when all you need is a knife It's meeting the man of your dreams And then meeting his beautiful wife And isn't it ironic.....don't you think A little too ironic....and yeah I really do think... Chorus As I ended the song, I slowly opened my eyes. To my surprise the room was now completely crowded and everyone was on their feet clapping and whistling at me. 'Wow' was all I could think. Nick ran over to me and congratulated him. I noticed that he had a cap on as well as shades. " Jason...Jason..you are so hired. I have never seen so many people before go nuts over anybody's performance. Congratulations. You will be performing Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays." Joe said with a huge grin on his face. " Wanna get outta here?" Nick asked. " Yeah. Let's go." On the way back to my apartment Nick kept telling me how much he loved my performance. I was so happy and excited that I kept laughing, smiling, and talking with Nick. My mouth just couldn't shut. We pulled up to my apartment. Nick and I said our good byes and then Nick left. That night I slept so good, I felt good. I felt good about myself. I really needed that performance, it was a way of expressing how I feel inside. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- -------------------------- A week later. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- -------------------------- The lights went out and the spot light was on me once again. I've actually grown quite comfortable performing in front of people. I wanted tonight's performance to be a happy one, instead of the sad, dark songs I usually do, because Kevin, Nick, Howie, and AJ all came to see me. The band and I started to perform Tina Turner's version of Prod Mary... Looking for a job in the city........................ ...................... ..................... .................. ...................... Rolling! Rolling! Rolling on a River! Just then Brian walked in with another guy. They sat down. I could tell they were dating, cause from where I was standing I could see them playing footsie under the table. I stopped singing and motioned the band to stop. The crowd who was clapping and singing along fell silent. Joe looked over with concern, as did Kev and the others. I looked Brian dead in the eyes. He just smiled and waved at me. I gathered myself and spoke to the audience.... "I'm sorry for stopping the song but...If you don't mind i'd like to sing another song to portray how i'm feeling towards someone in the room tonight." I walked over to the band and told them which song to play. I grabbed a stool to sit on and sang..... How do you cool your lips After a summers kiss How do you rid the sweat After the body bliss How do you turn your eyes >From a romantic glare How do you block the sound Of a voice you'd know anywhere Oh I really should have known By the time you drove me home By the vagueness in your eyes Your casual good-byes By the chill in your embrace The expression of your face That told me Maybe you might have some advice to give On how to be insensitive How do you numb your skin After the warmest touch How do you slow your blood After the body rush How do you free your soul After you've found a friend How do you teach your heart It's a crime to love again Oh you probably won't remember me It's probably ancient history I'm one of the chosen few Who went ahead and fell for you I'm out of vogue I'm out of touch I fell too fast I feel too much I thought that you might have Some advice to give on how to be INSENSITIVE!!!!!( I screamed causing everyone to wipe their eyes and jump from being surprised- THEN the band immediately played the chorus to "You Oughtta Know"- which took everyone by surprise because we went from a slow emotional song to an anger-raged one.) Well i'm here to remind you Of the mess you left when you went away It's not fair to deny me Of the cross I bear that you gave to me You, You, You Oughtta KNOW!!!!!!!!!!!! We ended the song. My eyes were closed as the tears ran down my cheeks. I slowly opened my eyes. Everyone was on their feet staring at me with awe. Then they all started going wild and crazy, clapping, whistling, and screaming my name. I looked up to the ceiling, sighed, laughed at myself, and took my bow. As I was looking around I noticed that Brian and his date were gone. Then I looked to the way corner and saw it again. Those sparkling light blue eyes. I couldn't see the face though, the figure clapped, smiled, and left. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- -------------------------- In Nicks car ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- -------------------------- " Damn Jason. You make us look bad." AJ said from the back seat. " Yeah and you didn't even have to do any dance steps to work the crowd. You didn't even make eye contact the entire show." Nick said driving. " Why do you do that? I mean we close our eyes when singing too, but not through the entire song." Kevin asked " Well, when I close my eyes when I perform, its as if i'm in my own world. I don't worry about anything or anyone. I just bring my feelings out when I sing...i..i..I can't explain it." I explained " All I know is that you are an excellent performer." AJ said as he patted my back. " Thanks. But seriously stop it your making me blush." We all laughed. " Oh yeah Jay...before I forget...were leaving tomorrow to perform at some benefit concert. So you'll be all by your lonesome." Kevin informed me " Finally Peace and Quuuiiieett." " Very funny." Aj laughed out " Hey Jay...ww.was..that song you sang for Brian?" Howie asked. " It was at first, but then I realized that I needed to do it to release the pain, anger, and heartache. It was really good for me. I've been doing that since I was little. Every time I get upset, I would run to my room and sing it out." I started to wipe the tears forming at the corners of my eyes. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- -------------------------- The Next Day ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- -------------------------- After I saw the guys off- not including Brian cuz I ignored him the whole time- I decided on treating myself to some fun today. Kevin lent me his truck, so I was going to take advantage of it. " Where to go, Where to go?" I kept asking myself as I pulled out of the airport. Guess where I ended up. DISNEY WORLD!!!!! I've always wanted to go. I was kind of bummed that I had to go there alone, but I promised myself to have some fun. I gasped at the sight of Disney World when I saw it. I have never seen anything so beautiful, so magical. Excitement filled within me and soon my inner child was bursting out. I ran all over the place, rode the tea cups, got pictures with Goofy and Donald, rode every ride time would allow. It was getting dark and I was kind of upset, because I didn't get to go on all the rides. BUT I had to ride the tea cups just one more time. I got quite a lot of stares from people. Come on, an 18 year old riding the tea cups-quite a hilarious sit I imagine. As I was getting off my tea cup, I felt a little lightheaded. " That's enough fun for one day." I said while walking like a drunker to a drink stand. BANG!!!! I walked straight into another person who was running. " Owww!" I groaned laying on the ground. " Ditto." The person I ran into said. I picked myself up and dusted myself off, then I turned around to see the goof that ran into me. " I KNOW YOU!" We both said at the same time, which caused a smile from both our faces. " Your that guy that performs at the coffee shop right? I love your performance." He exclaimed. " And your the guy that was at that photo shoot a few weeks back, and i've seen you in the coffee shop a few times too." I explained. " Yup that's me. Oh where are my manners. My name is Josh." " Nice to meet you Josh, I'm Jason" As our hands touched a jolt of electricity stung both of us, but we gave each other a firm handshake anyways. Josh's eyes sparkled again. He just stared into my eyes, as I stared into his. 'Why does this guy look so familiar' I thought as I got lost in his gorgeous eyes. TBC......................................................................... .................................. There ya go! Hope you enjoyed the story. Responses....e-mail me at... sheragem@ite.net