Date: Tue, 31 Oct 2000 17:34:12 EST
From: Faradhi269@aol.com
Subject: For-Justin's-Love-11

*This story is a work of fiction.  It is not meant to imply the sexuality of
anyone in the story, although one can always dream.  You know the drill*

	I looked down to see the tent in my boxers and realized that I needed to
make some decisions in my life: and very soon.  I knew NSync would be coming
back from their tour soon for a very short break before continuing with it, and
I hadn't been to a biology class yet.  I also hadn't had any job offers yet, to
my extreme disappointment.  I figured that I needed to think for a while, and
that would probably affect my "problem."  So again, I sat down in front of my
computer and began to type.  This time, it was just me randomly going through
thoughts in my head.  Justin, Nick, Aaron, my life, my dream, all of it.  I was
getting a little tired of all the confusion that I felt.
	My problem lay in the fact that I knew what I wanted to do, but I was
uncertain if it was something I could do.  So far, none of my interviews down
here in Orlando had gone very well, and although Nick was really cool, and so
was his family, I hadn't had much to show for it.  My agent in St. Louis was
livid that I'd been gone so long, even though she'd e-mailed me all the things
I'd need for my competition in NYC.  I sat back, realizing that the Biology
course would never happen.  What I needed now was some decent dance instruction,
more voice lessons, and some good exercise to stay in shape for school.  As I
couldn't (and can't) dance worth a crap, I figured it may become important for
me to make it as an actor on Broadway.  I remembered when I met the young Mr.
Mistoffolees from Cats.  He'd said he'd been a dancer for seven years before
making his Broadway debut, so I knew I had to do some catching up.  Now, as for
the relationship.
	I sat pondering the inevitable-breaking up, feeling the pain and suffering
of loneliness again, and worst (at that time) the lack of sex after getting used
to it!  As soon as that thought struck, I laughed ruefully.  There I went,
thinking with my dick again.  When was I ever gonna learn?  Looking over at the
clock, it read 8:03.  For a weekend, I was up awfully early.  Hell for a
weekday, I was up early!  Just after I started typing again, I heard the shower
start and poked my head into the bathroom to see who it was.  Aaron, of course.
Nick was obviously still asleep, and as Aaron would be busy, I figured
stretching would be a good way to start.  I knew what I had to do, but how to
tell Nick would be difficult.  I decided to do it the good old-fashioned way:
blunt and direct, but let's have some fun first.
	With a shit-eating grin on my face, I ran into Nick's room and jumped on
his prone form, crying "POUNCEE!!!" as I did so.  He flinched violently at the
sound, eyes opening and his breath wooshed from his body as I landed squarely on
the center of his chest.  "Mornin' sunshine," I grinned at him.  "What'cha got
planned for the day?"
	He groaned and tried to swat me aside with his pillow.  "I WAS planning on
sleeping," he informed me pointedly.  I smiled even wider.
	"Were!  Great!  Let's go to the beach!"
	He frowned at me.  "The beach?  It's not even that close to town, man!"
	"Aw, c'mon," I begged, dragging him out of bed comically.  "It'll be fun!"
	He eyed me suspiciously, but after I poked and prodded him for a few
minutes, he finally agreed, getting up and getting dressed.  "You owe me," he
maliciously added as I left his room.  I went downstairs to the kitchen to get
some breakfast and set up a picnic lunch.  Looking at the bright sunshine
streaming through the windows, I was glad I chose today.  It was perfect!
	I grabbed everything I thought we'd need, and put it into a cooler.  Nick
came down after a few more minutes, still wiping the sleep from his eyes, but
seeing me ready to go, he acquiesced.  In the car, he looked over at me
curiously.  "Why the sudden rush to go to the beach, Ry?  I thought you said you
never really liked the beach."
	"Well," I hedged, "I like going once or twice.  I just don't like going
all day, every day."  I leaned into him suggestively.  "Unless I'm with a cute
guy in a small suit, of course," I added, leering.
	He stared at me in absolute shock, cheeks flaming, while I began to
chuckle.  "Not funny," he insisted, embarrassed.  Changing the track on the CD
to something a little faster, Nick sped up.
	I let it go, seeing his jaw clenched.  -Did I go too far-I wondered.  -You
know he likes you.-  Still the ride wasn't as awkward as it began, and after a
few more minutes of the strange silence, we began to chat with each other like
I'd always hoped we would.  I don't even know how long the trip to the beach
took, but it didn't seem long.  Getting there, we disembarked from the car and
strolled down to find a nice spot.  I laid down a huge towel and took off my
shirt, already enjoying the heat of the mid morning sun.  Nick quickly did the
same.  Setting the cooler down on the edge of the two towels, I looked around
the beach.  On our right, maybe two hundred yards away, I saw a group of
young people standing in a circle.  It looked like they were doing cartwheels
and handstands in the center.  I strolled over to take a look, beckoning Nick
after me.
	"What's up," he asked.
	"There're some people up ahead I wanna check out.  You wanna come?"
	"I guess so.  You'll protect me if they mob me again, right," he asked
jokingly.  I smiled.  "I don't have my sai with me today, but I'll do my best,"
I replied.
	"Then let's go!"
	Walking over to the group, I saw about twelve young men and women-most of
them seemed to be between fifteen and twenty-one-wearing baggy shorts and (in
the case of the women) tank tops.  Off to one side stood an older man I hadn't
seen before, dressed in a similar manner.  He was holding a weird, fishing pole
looking object, and was striking the line, making a rhythmic sound.  On beat,
two of the young men (they were both cute) entered the center of the circle in a
different way-one cartwheeled, the other performed a back handspring-and began
to "dance."
	"Capoeira," I exclaimed, surprised.  What luck!  I've been meaning to
learn more intricate capoeira for a long time.  My basic stuff wasn't all that
great.
	Nick looked at me, confused for a second.  "What?"
	"Just watch."
	The two of them began to do spinning heal kicks in rapid succession,
getting closer and closer to each other every time until one seemed just about
to strike the other.
	Instead, the apparent victim did a one-handed back handspring and his foot
knocked the other boy's foot out of the way.  Then they stepped in and clasped
hands.  Everyone in the circle clapped, and so did Nick and I.
	"How do they do that," Nick asked.
	"Hold still and I'll show you," I instructed.  Nick looked uncertain.  "I
won't hit you," I promised.  He still looked nervous.  "Fine. Wait there and
I'll show you."  I placed my left foot forward and leaned my right foot back
behind me in a sweeping motion.  Then I followed with my left foot performing
the same motion.  But as my right foot came forward in a slight shuffle, I
lowered my head to the sand and brought my left foot swinging around at head
height.  When it came back down, I was standing up with my right side facing
forward.  "That is more or less the kick.  At least, that's how I learned it," I
said.
	"Can you show me?"
	"Sure."  I moved to position Nick's legs the right way.  I was
concentrating on his feet (he had such cute feet) that when I looked up to see
his face, my nose-large as it is-bumped into his crotch.  I blushed.  "Oops.
Sorry 'bout that."
	"No problem."  He didn't mention a thing about it.  After about fifteen
tries or so, he finally managed to straighten his leg and get it the right
height, but fell over.  He kept going at it, but kept falling.
	"Nick," I wondered after he landed on his back for the eighth time, "how
is it that you're such a great dancer, but can't do a simple kick worth a shit?"
He laughed from his back, and as I helped him up, one of the boys from the
circle came over.  "Hey, we just saw what you were doing.  Do you practice
capoeira?"  He looked fairly young, perhaps thirteen or fourteen with sun-
darkened skin and muddy brown hair that was just a ragged mop on the top of his
head.
	"Not very well," I admitted.  "But I really want to learn to be better.
Is that your maestre," I asked, pointing at the older man.
The young guy nodded.  "Yes.  And he's asked me to invite you to dance."
	"Me?"
	He nodded again.  I looked over at Nick, who shrugged even as he brushed
the sand off his bare back.  I smiled, saying, "Why not?"
We walked into the center of the circle, knelt at the edge and clasped
hands.
"Got the rhythm," he asked me impishly.
	"Yeah, why?"
	"Then GO!"  He spun in a cartwheel into the dead center of the circle, and
I quickly followed suit.  Coming to our feet, he spun immediately into a
spinning-heel kick like I was trying to show Nick a few moments before.  I spun
to the right and as his left foot went by my head, I whirled around to bring my
right foot around in the same way in front of his face.  We spun circles and
counter-circles, staying with the rhythm of the strange instrument.  As he
changed the dance and performed a low spinning kick, I jumped and performed a
hurricane-bringing my left foot around in the air after my right.  I landed and
imitated his spin sweep.  To my surprise and amazement, he did a complete back
flip and landed right back in the rhythm.  As he went low again, I tried to do
the same thing.  I was in the air when I realized that I was only about halfway
through the maneuver.  "Oh SHIT," I cried as I slammed ungracefully into the
soft sand with a plop.  The music stopped and everyone laughed.  My opponent
held out his hand to help me up, even though he was nearly doubled over
laughing.  While he was off balance that way, I graciously accepted his hand but
pulled him into the sand next to me.  Everyone laughed again and I rolled over
onto my back.  Bringing my feet up to my head, I kicked out, propelling myself
off the sand to land standing on my feet.  I then held out my hand to my fallen
opponent.  He accepted it and I helped him up.  "Nice dance," I told him.
	"Nice dance," he replied.  "But it's not over yet."  I looked at him
curiously and the maestre began to play the same rhythm again.  "We need to
finish and leave the circle," he informed me.
	DOH!  I nodded and cartwheeled back into the circle of waiting people.  He
performed a back handspring into the circle as well, and the next two people
lined up and tumbled their way into the center.  I bowed my thanks to the
maestre and shook hands with the kid.  "Thanks for the dance.  It was fun."
	"Yes it was.  Thanks for joining.  Do you want to stay?"
	I looked over to see Nick standing there waiting.  "No thank you.  My
friend is waiting for me, and I shouldn't really be leaving him alone."
	"OK.  Later."
	"Bye," I called as I headed back to the sex-symbol who'd been waiting for
me.
	"So, did you have fun," he asked me, somewhat bitterly.
	"Sure did.  How 'bout you," I joked.  He didn't look amused.  "Ok, well, I
just did something I wanted to do.  What do you want to do then?"
	He smiled then, finally.  "Let's go swimming!"  I shrugged and he ran
towards the surf.
	Looking at him, he formed an image that I've never quite forgotten.  The
sun was shining brightly and the sky was a brilliant blue.  The water was a
blue-green that positively glowed in the sunlight, and Nick's golden-blonde hair
and tanned skin flowed into the sand of the beach as he took off and dove into
the water.  I shook my head ruefully.  This was not going to be easy, especially
after such an amazing view.
	I was woken from my reverie by my cell phone ringing.  "Hello?"
	"Ryan?  This is Justin."
	"Hey, Justin!  How's it goin'?"
	"All right.  Look, I can't talk long, 'cause I'm about to go to rehearsal,
but our management changed the schedule on us and I won't be able to make it for
a while.  I'm really sorry."
	"Ok.  So, how long are we talking about?"
	"July."
	"July!?  That's some change!"
	"Yeah, I know.  I'm really sorry, Ry.  I really wanted to make it there,
but, you know, it's my job.  I can't do anything about it."
	"I understand, J.  I just suppose I'll have to make do here.  On the
beach.  In the sun.  With pools and tropical drinks."
	"Hey, stop tryin' to give me a fake guilt trip, ok?  I feel lousy enough
as it is!"
	"OK, I promise.  I still haven't gotten word on jobs down here, so I'm
gonna need to find some summer work or go home.  Give me a call soon, and I'll
let you know what's going on if you want to know."
	"I do.  I'll keep in touch.  Good luck with the job hunting."
	"Thanks.  Break a leg onstange."
	"Thanks.  Later."
	"Yeah, later."
	He hung up and I realized that I'd said the truth to Justin.  I needed
work.  I had to get ready for my new school, even if it didn't start until
October, and I DID have that convention coming up in New York City, so I had
work to do getting back in shape.  I frowned.  I didn't really want it to be
like this.
	Nick, coming in from the water to pull me into it, saw my frown and came
over to ask me, "What's up, Ry?  Everything OK?"
	"I guess so," I replied.  "I'm just feeling a little tired.  You wanna
stay a lot longer?"
	He looked at me strangely.  This was as down as he'd ever seen me before.
"After everything you did to get me here, you want to leave after only like a
half-hour?  I mean, are you sure you're all right?"
	"I'm fine, Nick.  I think I'll just lay down and get some sun.  Have fun.
Enjoy the water."
	"Hey!  YOU'RE the one who wanted to come to the beach!  I don't know why I
even bother..." he broke off, looking at a young man in a speedo who walked by
us... "to come drive all the time.  You seem to change your mind too often!"
	I laughed at the way he could just stop in the middle of a discussion and
act as though he never did.  Useful talent, that.  "I'm sorry.  It's just..."
	"Just what?"
	"Justin called and said they can't make it down here until July.  I
haven't gotten called back for any of the jobs I auditioned for, and I just
don't know what I'm going to do, where I'm going to stay, that sort of thing.
It all hit me at once and got me kinda down.  I'm sorry."
	He looked at me in sympathy.  "It's all right.  I understand, really.
When we get home we'll give JP a call and see if he's got anything set up for
you.  Something may come up still!  C'mon, let's go."
	I nodded, relieved that he was so understanding and picked up our towels
and shirts.  He grabbed the rest of our gear and we legged it back to the car.
"You think Mr. Stein can help," I asked as we walked.
	Nick shrugged.  "Sure.  It's just bad luck is all.  You're talented enough
to get those jobs.  I saw you perform.  You're great.  So don't worry, you'll
get it."
	We began loading our stuff in the car.  "Thanks Nick.  You don't know how
much I appreciate that.  Especially coming from you."
	"What do you mean?"
	I smiled.  "Nothing."  Closing my eyes, I fell asleep a few moments later.

	I awoke to see a smiling face looking down on me.  "You MUST've been
tired, man," Nick joked.  "We passed a bunch of guys in speedos and you didn't
blink!"
	I yawned.  "Why would I blink," I asked.
	He looked a little perplexed.  "What do you mean?"
	I smiled a little.  "Well, if I wanted to see a bunch of hot guys in
speedos, why in the name of sanity would I blink?  Wouldn't that just cut down
on the few seconds I'd have had to look at them?"
	"Er..."
	"So, what's this about blinking," I asked, trying to give him a generous
way out.
	"Nothing."
	"OK.  Just makin' sure."
	He mock-glared at me and I laughed heartily.  I hadn't really realized how
good being around Nick could make me feel.  I got out of the car and we
approached the front door.  To my surprise, a large number of suitcases were
lining the entrance hall around the door.  "What's this," I asked, my complete
confusion obvious.
	"I dunno.  MOM," he shouted, "WHAT'S GOING ON?"
	A muffled reply came down from upstairs, and Nick repeated his question,
more loudly the second time.
	"I SAID, WE'RE GOING BACK TO L.A. TOMORROW!  I TOLD YOU THAT DAYS AGO!"
	I looked, stricken, at Nick.  "What does she mean," I wanted to know.  My
options as to leaving were beginning to dissipate rapidly, and I was not yet
ready to go home.
	"I forgot," Nick replied.  "She and the kids are going back home.  I
didn't realize that so much time had passed!"
	"What do you mean, going back home?"
	"Well, actually, this is my house.  I bought a house in Cali for the
family, 'cause I wanted to be able to get away from mom for a while," he
confessed.  "Aaron had some business up here.  I think he was doing something
with Nickelodeon and mom just decided to take a couple days off to relax."
	That made sense.  Then something clicked.  "And your dad?  Why isn't he
here?"
	"I don't know, but I figured something was up when Mom had all the kids
with her.  Usually, she just travels with Aaron and Dad would watch the others,
but Mom hasn't said anything about it yet."
	"So, you moved all of your stuff into the other room instead of making
your mom sleep there?"
	He smiled sheepishly.  "Actually, I did it as a favor to Aaron.  I knew he
wouldn't want to share a bathroom with Mom.  I didn't mind, 'cause I knew it
wouldn't be for too long."
	"Oh.  And now they're leaving?"
	"Yep," he replied happily.
	"Nice.  Well," I sighed, "I guess I'd better call JP Stein now, shouldn't
I?"
	"If you want to.  But don't forget, even he has to take some time."
	"Yeah, I know.  But as much as I like hanging out with you, I really need
to get out and do something.  Swimming is helping me keep in shape, but I need a
good workout routine or a steady job.  One of the two."
	"I understand.  Just be patient."
	"Patient," I responded flatly.
	"Yes, patient," he laughed.  "Now you're getting cranky!"
	"Like you, you mean?"
	"What!?  I'm gonna get you for that one," he joked.
	I smiled grimly.  More grimly and seriously than I'd actually intended.
"Bring it on."
	He looked startled, and then to my surprise, his eyes took on a look of
pain and he walked silently away...