Date: Thu, 25 Jan 2001 22:56:01 -0800 (PST)
From: Red <redfirewitch@yahoo.com>
Subject: Hide In Plain Sight: Chapter 18 - Guilty

Title: Hide In Plain Sight 18/20

Author: Red (redfirewitch@yahoo.com)

Dedication: To all my authors at Slashy Goodness. You
guys are incredible people! Thanks for letting me host
your stories but more than that, thanks for putting up
with my crazy e-mails!

*******************
Chapter 18: Guilty
*******************

Joey sat on the stairs, with his hands clasped
together under his chin. He looked over the living
room of the Harliss residence. It resembled a wake at
the best.

Chris was standing near the window and looking out.
His fingers moved against his mouth as he
systematically bit off his nails. He continually
shifted from foot to foot.

Lance sat crossed legged on the recliner. He looked
paler than usual, his hand massaging his forehead as
he talked on his cell phone to someone. Joey concluded
that it was one of his family members.

Then there was Justin. He was stretched out on the
couch, with his head on his mom's lap. Lynn ran her
hands over her son's forehead. She had long given up
talking to Justin because he never responded. Ever
since finding out that Matt was involved in the whole
fiasco, Justin had lapsed into silence. It worried all
of them but they understood. If anything happened to
JC, Justin was going to blame himself. And it might
not just stop there.

"They are here." Chris announced suddenly.

Justin sat up abruptly. Lynn stood up, headed to the
door and opened it. Karen, Roy, Heather and Tyler
Chasez stood there, looking tired and distraught.
Karen had tears streaks on her face and the moment she
saw Lynn, she broke down again. Lynn embraced her
friend and invited them all in.

The next few minutes were spent with everyone hugging
everyone else to offer support and comfort. They all
then settled down in the living room. Karen noticed
Justin sitting motionlessly and silently. She knew
from having spoken to Lynn earlier that Justin
wouldn't talk to anyone. So she sat beside him and
patted his hand in comfort. Justin slowly took her
hand in his but didn't say a word.

"Have the police been informed?" Roy Chasez asked.

"Yes. They are keeping this quiet." Chris answered.

"Why? If it's in the news, then maybe someone who has
seen him would come forward." Tyler said.

"Elli said that that's a risk. He's got another plan.
He'll be here soon to explain to us what is going to
happen."

"I still don't understand what happened." Heather said
softly, her blue eyes swimming with tears.

"You said something about...er... Justin's boyfriend..."
All eyes fell on Justin momentarily. "...being involved
in this?" Roy asked.

Lance nodded.
"Matt Vance, He's been linked to the first letter and
we think he's behind all the letters and the phone
call."

"But why? What did JC do to him?" Tyler asked, anger
coloring his voice.

Lance looked at Justin who hadn't looked up once.
"We are not sure." It wasn't a lie. Lance could guess
why but he wasn't sure of it.

"So there is no Phillip? This was all Matt Vance from
the word go?" Roy asked.

"It's possible." Lance replied. "But we don't know how
he would have known about Phillip and Liam and all the
details."

"Phillip. Liam. This is like a nightmare." Karen
whispered. In the silent room, her words echoed. She
looked at everyone. "I keep thinking that this is just
some sick joke. Or maybe this is some other Josh
involved in this. Not my son"

Lynn shook her head.
"He's still the same Josh, Karen. He's just a
frightened boy."

"How can you say that? Is he my son? My son has been
hiding from me! For six years? All the things that
happened and he never told me! Not one thing! Not that
he was gay! Not about Liam. Not about shooting
someone!" Karen shook her head. "I...I don't
understand? Was I such a horrible mother that he
couldn't tell me anything? Did I make him feel that
way? For six years, all he showed me was a happy face.
He lied to his family! I thought he was happy! But he
was hiding such a horrible secret! Oh god!" Karen
covered her mouth with her hands and sobbed.

"He was just afraid that if you knew that he was gay,
you wouldn't love him." Lynn said.

"Justin told you, Lynn. He trusted you enough to tell
you! Why didn't my son trust me?" Karen said.

"Justin told me because I asked him. Sure, I would
like to think that he would have told me even if I
hadn't had a clue but I don't know that. They are two
different people, Karen. Josh has always been serious
and reserved. He would rather keep the bad things to
himself than to make people around him miserable. He
always tries to protect everyone else. He may have
thought that he was sparing you from some
unhappiness."

"But he didn't give me the choice!" Karen cried out,
tears streaming down her cheeks. Realizing that she
shouting, she calmed down visibly. She closed her eyes
and took a shaky breath. "I don't care if he is gay,
Lynn. I just want my baby boy back." Karen ended in
whimper.

Lynn, with her eyes tearing up, embraced her friend
while Lance consoled Heather who had started to cry
too. The other men wished they could hit something.
They hated feeling so helpless.

Suddenly, Justin stood up and headed up the stairs.
Everyone looked at him in shock.

"Justin? Where are you going?" Joey asked.

Justin didn't say a word. Chris and Joey exchanged a
worried look.
"We'll talk to him." They told the rest and hurried
after him.

Justin went into his room and started pulling out
drawers. He took out an album and began to pull out
the pictures. He began to tear them up. Chris and Joey
saw that they were pictures of him and Matt. One by
one were torn up and thrown to the floor. Tears were
streaming down Justin's face as pieces of photographs
floated to the floor.

"Should we do something?" Joey asked Chris, anxiously.

Chris shook his head without taking his eyes off the
blond who was methodically working his way through the
album.

Justin lunged at his dresser and pulled open the
drawer. He took out a gold necklace and ran to the
window. Opening the window, he threw it out. He
returned to the drawer and took out some letters. He
began to tear them too. Soon the room was a mess with
torn paper and photos littering the floor. Justin
stopped. For a minute. Breathing hard. Then his face
crumbled and he ran out of the room with Chris and
Joey tailing him. By now, everyone else was also
outside his room watching Justin's outburst. Justin
pushed past them and ran into the bathroom slamming
the door shut.

"Shit!" Lance cursed.

Joey tried to open the door, but it was locked.

Everyone stared at each other. Lynn's eyes were wide
with fear. She knew that Justin wasn't in stable frame
of mind and she feared what he might do. She pushed
pass Joey and Chris and stated to bang on the door.
"Justin! Open the door!" Lynn cried.

They heard the sound of water and crying.

"Justin! Please, open the door!" Lynn cried, banging
on the door frantically.

Joey and Chris held Lynn back.
"We'll break down the door."

Karen and Heather held Lynn and pulled her away from
the door. Chris, Joey and Lance positioned themselves
to shoulder slam the door.

"Ready?" Chris said and the other two nodded.

Bang.

Bang.

Bang.

On the third attempt, the lock gave way and the door
slammed open. Everyone rushed into the bathroom and
was met with the saddest sight they had ever seen.

Justin sat on the shower floor, against the wall,
fully clothed, with the shower running. The water had
soaked through his clothes and his hair was a lank mop
of wet curls. His fingers were pulling at his hair and
he repeatedly hit the back of his head against the
wall. Justin kept muttering the same words.

"My fault. My fault. My fault."

**

It had taken them a few minutes to get Justin out of
the shower. Tyler and Lance helped Justin change out
of his wet clothes, as the blonde was too lost in his
guilt to be even aware of his surroundings. Then they
put him to bed. Justin slowly slipped into
unconsciousness, still muttering to himself. Lynn came
into the room and watched her son sleep. She ran her
hand over her son's hair and stifled a sob. Lance
patted her shoulder. The three of them left the room
and walked down to the kitchen.

Everyone was quiet in the kitchen. Karen had made a
plate of sandwich for everyone but no one was in the
mood to eat. Everyone was lost in his or her own
worried thoughts. They looked up as Lynn, Lance and
Tyler entered the kitchen.

"How is he?" Roy asked.

"He's sleeping. He kept saying that it was his fault
until he fell asleep." Tyler replied.

Karen shook her head.
"I can't believe he blames himself. No one blames him
for what his boyfriend did."

Lynn sighed.
"No one but him. He blames himself because he thinks
he's the reason why Matt did what he did."

"What do you mean?" Heather asked.

Lynn, Chris, Lance and Joey exchanged glances. Lynn
made the decision.

"JC was in love with Justin."

"What!" Karen, Roy, Heather and Tyler exclaimed at the
same time.

"They told us yesterday. Matt might have known this."

"JC was in love with Justin? So this Matt might be
doing this out of jealousy? But why? Is Justin in love
with JC?"

"Only Justin can answer that."

"So can I." Lance said.

Everyone looked at him.

"Yesterday when we found out that JC had gone after
Phillip, I talked to Justin. He said he loved JC too
but hadn't told JC."

"Oh my god! So Matt knew that Justin's in love with JC
and...oh my god!" Karen exclaimed.

Just then the doorbell rang. Joey went to see who it
was.

"I don't get it. So Matt was sending these letter but
why? What was he trying to do to JC?" Roy asked.

"Probably harass JC emotionally." Chris said.

"Then where did JC go? Did he go after Matt?" Roy
asked.

"I don't think so. JC was convinced that Phillip was
alive and coming after him." Lance said.

"But it was Matt all along. We don't know if this
Phillip really is alive." Tyler stated.

"Yes we do."

Elli Field entered the kitchen with Joey and another
man. Joey quickly introduced everyone.

"This is Detective Pasco. He's taking over the
investigation." Elli said.

"You said that you know if Phillip is alive?" Chris
asked.

"Yes. Once we found out that Vance was involved in
this, we began to investigate all his calls and trips
in the past year. He's been to Maryland to investigate
Liam's death. He even took a trip to Mexico, where our
sources say that he's been asking about Phillip. We
then received this footage from the airport security
in Washington. It shows Matt and Phillip together.
Phillip is alive. He's wanted on drugs, homicide and
immigration charges."

"So Phillip and Matt are in this together?" Lynn said
in a hushed whisper.

"I'm afraid so, mam. What worries me is that if JC
really does know where to find Phillip then he's in
danger because..."

"Because I told Matt that JC was going after Phillip."
Justin said entering the kitchen. His eyes were red
and his face was emotionless.

"Justin? Honey, you shouldn't be up." Lynn said and
moved to her son's side.

"I'm ok, mom. Mr. Fields, did you trace the references
in the letters?" Justin asked. Chris exchanged a
worried glance with Lance and Joey. Justin was too
calm. A complete 180 from just a few minutes ago. That
didn't speak well of his state of mind.

"That's what I wanted to talk to you all about. Maybe
you should take seat."

With worry stark on the faces, everyone sat down.
Justin refused and just stood there, waiting for Elli
to speak.

"The letters mentioned a lot of places but none of
them led to anything significant. Except for the
reference to Marty's. It's near the docks and just a
mile away from where we found JC's jeep." Elli said.

Detective Pasco continued.
"Within minutes we found out that a guy matching
Phillip's description has indeed been seen there. And
when we showed JC's photo, they positively identified
him, saying that he was there just the night before,
looking for Phillip. We started a search of the area
and found Phillip's apartment."

Everyone looked at him, anxiously

"The apartment was empty but we found signs that there
had been a struggle. There was a wrench with blood on
it. We sent it to the lab and it matched with JC's."

"Oh god!" Karen sobbed.

"But we don't think anything happened to him, mam,"
the detective rushed to confirm. "There were wires
found which we thing were used to tie JC up and a
chloroform soaked cloth. He was still alive when he
was removed from the apartment."

"He was removed from the apartment?!" Roy exclaimed.
"Where? Do you know?"

Elli shook his head.
"No. That's where we reached a dead-end. Witnesses
said that they saw a white van parked in front of the
building but they couldn't give us anything else."

"What now then?" Joey asked.

"Maybe we should inform the media!" Heather suggested,
looking like she was struggling not to break down.

"I have another idea." Elli said and looked at Justin.
"But Justin, only you can do this."

Lynn looked slightly alarmed.
"What do you want him to do?"

Justin placed his hands on his mom's shoulder.
"Whatever it is, I'll do it." Justin said, his
resolved evident on his face and in his tone.

Elli nodded and went on to explain.

**

tbc...Chapter 19: The Rescue (tentative title)