Date: Sun, 10 Sep 2000 20:18:40 EDT From: Bangoremail@aol.com Subject: Jamie's Romance - Ch 22 Greetings everyone, Here's Chapter 22. First off a belated congratulations to Brian Littrell in his marriage to Leigh Anne Wallace on September 2nd in Atlanta. I would've done it in the last chapter but didn't hear the official word until after I had posted it. A big prop to *NSync for their showing at the VMA's. They got best Pop video, best choreography and Viewers Choice. Plus their performance was the best one there, I thought. Justin had on the greatest leather pants! Great job guys! A thanks to Nino for helping me think through some of this chapter, and everyone that has given me a kind word about the story. As usual: This story is purely fiction and is not intended to imply anything about the true sexuality of 'N Sync or anyone associated with their organization. It is meant for those over the age of 18 only and those who wish to read stories with sexual content. ****** Jamie's Romance - Chapter Twenty-Two The circle of light surrounded him in the darkened room. Jamie groaned in his sleep. It was the dream again but this time only different. There were no footsteps, no chuckling. The feeling of being watched was still there. Jamie willed himself to be strong. He stepped toward the edge of the light and got nearer to it. As he reached the edge two paths materialized in front of him. Down one he could see a forest clearing. Sun shone through the trees and he could hear birds singing. Down the other he could make out Justin desperately holding onto a railing. It seemed he was in the middle of some sort of storm calling out Jamie's name although no sound came from him. "You must choose," the voice said startling Jamie. "This isn't real, I don't have to choose. This doesn't exist." "Choose," the voice insisted. "No!" Jamie turned his back and walked to the other end of the circle where he found the two choices waiting for him. "Choose." "I refuse to play your game anymore." Jamie went to the center of the circle and sat, putting his head in his hands. "This is your game, no one else's. Choose!" the voice insisted more forcefully. Jamie opened his eyes and saw that the circle was gone. All that remained was the one spot he sat in connected to the two choices on opposite sides of him. He looked toward the figure of Justin and thought of him. The dream wavered but remained. "Justin!" Jamie called to the figure but it did not hear him. "JUSTIN!" Jamie screamed waking himself up, knowing what the dream meant. He sat in the bed alone sweating and trembling. Justin burst into the room a few seconds later. "Jamie, are you ok?" he asked breathlessly as he hopped on the bed and pulled Jamie into his arms. "I'm fine. Where were you?" Jamie clutched at Justin tightly. "I just got back from a run and was stretching out in the driveway when I heard you scream. It was pretty loud, babe. I think I just about jumped up the entire flight of steps." Jamie noticed that Justin was wet with sweat. "I'm ok, or I will be." "It was the dream again, wasn't it?" "It was and it wasn't. It was different this time. It wanted me to choose." "Choose what?" Jamie let out a shuddering breath. "Choose a life of turmoil with you or a peaceful life without you." Justin sat back in shock. Was this how Jamie really felt? Or was this just the rambling of a bad nightmare? He hugged Jamie tightly. "It will be ok, Jamie. It was only a bad dream." Jamie looked up at Justin. "I know, but it's hard not let it affect me. It was so strong, so real." "We will beat it together." Jamie smiled at Justin. "Thank you." He took Justin's face in his hands and pulled him down for a kiss. Soon Justin's lips parted and Jamie reached out with his tongue to find Justin's. They finally stopped to catch a breath.. "Baby, nobody can kiss me like that," Justin panted into Jamie's ear. "And nobody should be," Jamie chuckled feeling better in Justin's arms. They both giggled together before Justin pulled away. "Why don't you hit the shower while I fix some breakfast. I'll shower after breakfast. We have about an hour before Josh gets here." Jamie nodded and Justin kissed his forehead. "Jamie, last night before we fell asleep you called me something that I haven't heard in a long while." Jamie blushed. "JuJu? I'm sorry, I must've read it somewhere and it just came out. I'm sorry." "No, please, I'd like you to call me that if you want," Justin smiled. "I like the way you say it," he added a little bashfully. "I love you, JuJu." Jamie kissed Justin one last time before heading to the shower. "And I love you too, sweet pea." ------ They spent the morning going from one ride to another. JC pulled the small group along like a little kid would his parents. No ride was ruled out and all four of them were laughing and having a great time. It was early in the season so the park was fairly empty and they stopped worrying about being mobbed and just had a good time. Jamie's favorite so far was the flume because everyone but him had gotten soaked. He was sitting between Joey and Justin and ducked so that they caught the brunt of the splash. Joey called a break to stop for something to eat. Just as they were finishing lunch Jamie had trouble catching his breath and he knew something was wrong. "Justin, I think I need to go to the first aid station." Justin was immediately on alert. "What's wrong?" he asked with concern. "I think my allergies are acting up and it's making it hard for me to breath. I need to get some Sudafed or something." Justin relaxed only a little. "Did you bring your atomizer?" Jamie shook his head no. "Atomizer?" JC asked. "For my asthma, Josh. Although I haven't had an attack since high school, I still carry it with me just in case, but I left it back in my suitcase." "Ok, let's go find the nurse." Justin rose holding Jamie by the arm to lead him. Joey was way ahead of them. He was busy checking the map while they were talking. "It's right around that corner," he pointed. In a few minutes they found the station and went inside. After asking a bunch of questions, the nurse gave Jamie some over the counter allergy medicine and an aspirin, admonishing him to take it easy. The group was more subdued now but they didn't let this spoil the fun. They spent the next couple of hours doing some more relaxed things in and around the arcade and spent nearly an hour in the bumper cars. Jamie spotted something in one of the gift shop windows and stopped them. "Josh, does Lance still collect Tasmanian Devil stuff?" "He sure does, he's fanatic about it, almost as much as Joe is about Superman." "Hey, I resemble that remark," Joey kidded. They went in to help Jamie find something new for Lance to add to his collection. When it seemed that they weren't having any success Jamie went to a salesclerk. "Excuse me, but could you tell me what is the newest merchandise that has the Tasmanian Devil on it?" The teenage boy smiled. "Well, that's an easy question. It's the beach towels right over there, they just came in yesterday. We've never had them before." "Great, thanks!" Jamie called the other guys over as he went to pick out two towels, each with a different pose on them. As Jamie went to pay for the towels the others continued looking around then met him at the checkout. The clerk's eyes got real big when he saw who Jamie was with. "Oh my...." was all he could say as his mouth worked. Jamie laughed and looked at the name tag. "Hey, Jeff. I bet if you ask real nice they'll sign some autographs for you." Jeff suddenly smiled and went over to a poster bin. Pulling one out, he unrolled it and handed Justin a marker. Justin looked down at the faces of him and the others. "They sell these here too, huh?" he asked with a big smile at Jeff as he signed above his head. Joey and JC did the same as Jeff rang up the towels for Jamie. Finally Jeff found his tongue. "I really love you guys. Your music is the best." JC smiled at him. "Thanks, Jeff. Wait until you hear the next album. It should be out sometime in March." Jeff grinned. "Can't wait! Thanks for the autographs." "It was the least we could do for a fan," Joey said as he held out his hand and shook Jeff's. "Jeff, quick, write down your name and address and we'll send you backstage passes and tickets to the next concert here in Orlando," Justin offered. "Oh, sure, wow, my sister will freak!" He handed Justin the paper and waved goodbye. Jeff was beaming as they left the store. Jamie turned to Justin. "That was very nice of you to do, sweetie." "We do that on occasion when something nice is done for us," he replied pointing to the bag in Jamie's hand. Jamie smiled at him. "I like the guy fans, they don't get all crazy like the girls do," Joey noted. "You have alot of them too. You just made another young gay boy very happy," Jamie said. "You sure he was?" JC asked. Jamie nodded. "Positive. While you were signing you didn't catch the looks he was giving you, Josh." They laughed as JC blushed. Joey grabbed Justin's arm as they passed an ice cream parlor and pointed. "Justin and I will be back in a minute, you guys want anything?" JC and Jamie looked at each other. "I think we're all set," Jamie answered for them both. "We'll be right over there on that bench." Joey and Justin practically ran into the store. "So how are you really doing, Josh?" Jamie asked as they sat. "I'm ok now, last night was really tough. I know it's only a few days but I miss him." JC stopped with a big sigh. "I know, Josh. Believe me, I know. Can I tell you something?" JC nodded. "Lance loves you very much. It killed him to leave you out of his trip home, I could see it in his eyes. He really wanted you there with him, but he was pretty sure his parents would react badly to his news and he didn't want you to be in the line of fire. He was trying to protect you from that." JC smiled. "Thanks. I guess I knew that all along but it helps hearing someone else say it. Today has really helped. Thanks for doing this." "Josh, you're my friend too and I wanted to spend some time with you. Plus you needed some time to just relax." "So, how are you and Justin doing?" "Fine, I think." "Anything wrong? That didn't sound so confident." "We just need to sit and talk about some things. We agreed to do that tomorrow and just enjoy ourselves for now." "No bad stuff, I hope." "Not really, Josh. Just relationship stuff. You know, things to work out before we can move forward from here." JC nodded. "I know all about that. I like you alot Jamie. I think you are a great guy and just the person Justin needs." Jamie blushed. "Thanks, Josh." JC patted his shoulder as he continued. "Justin is my best friend, has been for a long time now, and I tend to be a little protective of him. When Justin met you I could tell that he was head over heels for you from that first day." Jamie nodded, showing he knew this. "Well, since then he's been a different Justin. Jamie, Justin is so in love with you, I don't think he even knows how much." "I feel the same way but sometimes I wonder if this can really work." JC nodded to Jamie with a sad smile. "Let me tell you something if it will help but I'll deny I ever said it if Justin finds out." Jamie nodded. "My lips are sealed." JC stood and paced a little in front of the bench. "Sorry, but it helps me think." Jamie smiled and waited for him. "Jamie, Justin and I talked alot last week. He cried most of the time because he missed you so much. Sure I've seen him cry before, but never like this. He would do anything for you. If he had to he would quit everything and live in a cardboard box just to be with you." Jamie started to protest but JC cut him off. "No, don't worry, he wouldn't do anything like that. We wouldn't let him and I know you wouldn't either. You two are more alike than you know. I've seen it in your eyes when you play your guitar, it's the same look Justin gets on stage or in the studio. It would kill either of you to give that up." JC stopped pacing, sat and looked Jamie straight in the eye. "But more important than that, he's willing to move heaven and earth to make sure you are happy and that you two are together. It seems he needs you on some level that I don't quite understand. I think Lance does so you might ask him when he gets back." Jamie sat still as stone at Josh's words staring out over the courtyard they were sitting in yet not seeing anything. 'Could it be true?' he thought. JC just said the words that had been the center of his concerns about his relationship. JC's words: '...he needs you...' rang through his head. He returned his attention to JC who didn't catch his momentary slip of attention. "All of us really like you Jamie and we will support you and Justin. We had a meeting a few days ago while Justin was talking to Greg, our counselor. The four of us, and Johnny too, will do anything we can to help you guys out." "Geez, Josh, I don't know what to say." "You don't have to say anything. We all love you Jamie. You're now our brother too." Jamie got weepy and pulled JC into a hug. "Josh, you're so sweet." "Just holding up the image," he kidded. "I'm -supposed- to be the nice, sensitive one." "And you do a great job of it too." "Um, what's up with this. I go get some ice cream and you're moving in on my man, Josh?" Justin kidded as he sat on the other side of Jamie. Jamie pulled away from Josh and leaned against Justin's shoulder. Joey sat on the other side of JC eating his ice cream. "So what was the heavy conversation about?" he asked in between licks. "Boyfriend talk," Jamie answered cryptically. Justin raised an eyebrow at him. "Jamie and I helped each other work through some things," JC explained. "He made me realize what Lance was doing and that he was only thinking of me." JC winked at Jamie. "Well, I'm done here for the day," Justin stood stretching and was met with agreeing nods from the others. "You want to finish this for me, sweet pea?" he asked handing Jamie the cone. "Sure, would love to." "Sweet Pea?" JC asked making a gagging sound. "I like it, it's cute," Joey said slapping the back of JC's head. ------ Justin and Jamie followed JC's jeep in Justin's roadster. The top was down and Jamie enjoyed the air blowing through his hair. He glanced at Justin and winked at him as he reached over and undid a couple of buttons of Justin's tear away pants and slipped his hand in to feel the silky skin of his thigh. Justin smiled back then sighed happily as Jamie played with the hair on the inside of his leg. "You're such a tease, you know?" Justin kidded. "I can stop if you want?" Justin just grinned broadly and shook his head no. Jamie withdrew his hand and did up the buttons as they pulled into the driveway of Justin's house. They both sat in the car for a minute before they looked at each other and laughed. "Who's more scared here, anyway?" Jamie asked. He noticed the slightly haunted expression on Justin's face. "Babe, you're thinking of telling her aren't you?" Justin nodded. "I don't know if I can or will, but I'm seriously thinking about it. I don't want to hide you from her and I can't lie to her either." "I understand. I've got your back whatever you decide. And you know Joey and Josh do too." They were suddenly startled by a screaming face appearing over Justin's door. "Chris! Goddamn it, you nearly gave me a heart attack," Justin yelled as he smacked Chris' shoulder. "Jamie!" Chris yelled as he ran around the car to hug Jamie as he got out. "Hey there, Papa. How's it going?" "Going good. Here, I want you to meet, Dani." Chris took Jamie's arm and turned him to face his girlfriend. "Good to meet you, I'm Jamie," he extended his hand. "I'm Danielle, but you can call me Dani," she replied shaking his hand gently. "It's good to meet the guy that stole old goofy's heart." "Hey!" Justin protested as he gave Dani a hug. Jamie looked to Chris and back to Dani. "Um... Thanks." Dani noticed the uncertainty on Jamie's face. "Hey, I'm cool with it, they told me awhile ago. Now I have someone outside the group to trade war stories with, I hope we can become good friends." She grinned at Jamie trying to put him at ease. Jamie smiled at Justin then at Dani. "I think that would be great. They tend to get a little overwhelming at times and it seems we're attached to the two biggest trouble makers." Dani nodded in agreement and took Jamie's arm as he led her to the front door. "They can be such a handful!" Jamie grunted in agreement. Chris looked at Justin puzzled. "What just happened here?" "I don't know, Chris, but I don't think we're gonna like it." Shaking their heads they led the way into the house. Dinner was ready and they went immediately to the table. Justin quickly introduced Jamie to his mother. "Oh, you're the boy who's in the picture with Justin, right?" Justin shot his mother a look that she didn't catch, the alarm painfully obvious on his face. "Yes, ma'am." "Please, call me Lynn, all the boys do. It's very nice to meet you. Are you enjoying your stay?" "Yes, ma... um, Lynn. It's quite a change from New York this time of year." She laughed freely and agreed. "I'll say it is. Ok, everything's ready so take your seats everyone. Joseph, would you help me get the food on the table?" Joey obediently followed her into the kitchen. Although Justin didn't look happy about it Jamie thought it best if they didn't sit next to each other. He chose a chair between JC and Chris directly across from Justin so that, at least, they could still look at each other. "You're mother seems very nice, Just." Justin nodded smiling. "She is, Jamie," JC replied, "she's been like a second mother to all of us. Without her we would've probably all been basket cases." Jamie noticed Justin staring down at his plate. He reached with his foot and rubbed his ankle to comfort him. Justin looked up with a smile and a nod. The food arrived and they ate while making small talk. It was a pleasant, relaxed meal. Whenever Jamie would catch Justin sinking into himself he would tap his ankle and smile. When they had finished, Lynn grabbed Chris to help clear the table and bring out the shortcake they were having for dessert. "I see your mom has no trouble getting help for the meals," Jamie observed. Justin smiled. "We'll all have a turn. You're safe because your a guest here for the first time but don''t expect to get the same if you come again. I'll be safe for this meal because I'm expected to be your 'host.' Josh and Dani will probably get hit next putting the dishes away from the washer." Jamie shook his head in bewilderment. "It has something to do with southern hospitality. I've been down here for years and still haven't figured it all out yet," JC confided. They laughed as Chris carried in a tray of dessert dishes filled with strawberry shortcake. Just as everyone took their first bite the phone rang. Lynn excused herself to answer it. After a few minutes she returned, an unreadable expression on her face. "Dani, Chris and Joe, why don't you take your dessert to the deck and enjoy the sun before it sets. I'd like to talk with Josh and Justin for a minute in the living room and Jamie you might as well join us." Not waiting for a response she went into the living room. They did as she requested all knowing he meaning of her tone. It meant business. Joey and Chris patted the other three on the shoulder before leaving. Justin shot JC a look but JC just shrugged with a resigned look. The three of them went into the living room and took seats waiting for Lynn to speak. "There were actually two phone calls. One beeped through while I was on the first. First, Johnny called, Justin, and he asked me to tell you and Jamie that he'd like you to meet him for lunch tomorrow at the compound at noon. And the rest of the group should join them around 2 for a meeting." That was directed to JC who simply nodded. "Thanks, mom," Justin said quietly. "The second call was from Diane Bass." Three heads snapped in her direction in shock. If Lance's mother had called Lynn it wasn't good news. "What did Diane say, Lynn?" JC asked with a pained tone. "Well, I barely understood every other word she said she was so upset. It seems Lance left there a few hours ago and they have no idea where he went." The boys exchanged nervous glances at this news. "I assured her Lance was just out somewhere thinking and he'd be back. She's sitting tight waiting for him." After an uncomfortable silence she continued. "Let's see if we can clear the air around here. Since yesterday some things have puzzled me. So I'll tell you what I've seen and then you can fill me in on the rest, ok?" She wasn't expecting an answer and the resigned looks on JC and Justin's faces and the very uncomfortable look on Jamie's was all she needed to continue. "Yesterday morning, Joshua, you were up before me and offered to help without even having to be asked. That's so unlike you," she said with a warm smile. "Justin came down for his breakfast and gaive me the 'your the best mom in the world' speech." Justin started to protest but Lynn silenced him with a look. "Honey, it was sweet and I really appreciated it but it's something you only do when you either want me to agree to something or are trying to hide something. Let's see, then Lance. He came to the house looking like he hadn't slept in a week and was more quiet than usual the whole party. Justin moped most of the time and you, Josh, I couldn't scratch an itch without you there to help." She stopped to catch her breath as the boys hung on her words. Justin and JC now looked to her like they wished they were anywhere else, but Jamie had a very considering look on his face. She knew this look well. She wore it many times herself. "Lance obviously went home this weekend to tell his parents something very important and you guys know what. Anybody care to tell me?" Justin took a breath to speak but JC spoke first. "I think that Lance should be the one to tell you that, Lynn." She nodded. "Fair enough. Josh, Diane wants you to give her a call tonight. She wouldn't say why, just that she wanted to talk to you." "I'll be sure to do that." "Justin and Jamie, I've told you all this because you've been staying at Lance's. If he shows up there, Diane wants someone to call her." Both Justin and Jamie nodded in agreement. Lynn looked JC squarely in the eye. "I take it you're involved in whatever's going on with Lance, then?" JC nodded silently. "Josh, why don't you go join the others. I'll not pester you until Lance gets back, but I will want to know what's going on here." "Yes, Lynn," JC said as he stood and walked from the room. On his way by he gave Justin a 'hang tight' look. "That takes care of Josh and Lance for now." Lynn looked squarely at her son. "Are you gonna tell me what's wrong?" Justin paled as she spoke. "You've been depressed and sad sounding for a few months now and you've lost weight. Yesterday you weren't enjoying yourself like you usually do at a party and then today it's like Justin came back." She sat watching her son. He didn't know what to say and was clearly uncomfortable. Looking toward Jamie she noticed that his whole attention was on Justin. A suspicion that she had long since denied and forgotten came back into her mind. 'Please Lord, give me the strength to do what is right,' she prayed to herself. "Mom, I'm..." Justin cleared his throat and fought back the tears. "Mom, I've come to realize some things in the last few months. I... I..." The tears did fall then as Justin choked on his words. Jamie reached out and held his hand. Lynn closed her eyes. "Mom, promise me that you won't hate me. That you could never hate me," Justin cried. Justin's words stung Lynn to the heart. "Justin, whatever it is you can tell me. You are my son and I love you and nothing can ever change that. There is no way that I could ever hate you." Justin took courage at that but the tears continued to pour from his eyes. "Mom, I'm g-g-gay." The floodgates opened at that time and Justin started sobbing uncontrollably. He slumped down so that his head was in Jamie's lap. Without thinking Jamie comforted Justin and ran his hands through his curls, sympathetic tears staining his cheeks. Lynn took a deep breath and sighed putting her fingers to her temples as if soothing a headache. When Justin was more in control she continued. "Justin, I know it must be hard to tell me that. Believe me it's hard hearing it." Lynn rubbed her forehead. "It's not something that I would have hoped for you but I have to be honest and tell you that I had my suspicions." Justin blinked at her. "You don't hate me? You don't think I'm abnormal?" "No, honey. You are who you are, my son. I might not wholly agree with that lifestyle, that's something I have to deal with, but I could never stop loving you." Justin sat up from his place in Jamie's lap and leaned against him, his sobs settling down to sniffles. Jamie put his arms around Justin's shoulders quietly letting him know he was there and supporting him. "Mom, there's more." Lynn nodded tiredly. "I can see you are together." She paused gauging her words. "Do you love each other?" "Very much, Lynn," Jamie replied. Justin smiled in agreement through his tears. Lynn nodded. Not the answer she wanted to hear, it only made what she had to do that much harder. "Justin, could I have a moment alone with Jamie. I'd like to speak with him in private." Justin looked a little uncertain but he was never one to go against his mother's word. He gave Jamie a hug and peck on the cheek before going out to the kitchen. "Look, Lynn, I know what you might be thinking, but I didn't do this to Justin. Actually he's the one that came for me," Jamie said kindly. "Oh, no, Jamie, don't worry. I don't think that. Like I've said, I had my thoughts about Justin for awhile now. But it seems meeting you may have prompted him to come know himself, so to speak." Jamie nodded. Now he had no idea what she wanted. He figured she would play the 'you turned my son gay' card. It had been played on him once long ago. "Jamie, do your parents know that you're gay?" "Yes. I told them when I was in High School. Actually, I was forced into it by circumstances but that has nothing to do with this." "And you are a professional musician as well?" "I do studio work in New York, gig an occasional weekend and have some students as well." "Impressive for someone just out of college. You must be good indeed." Jamie blushed. "I can hold my own, I guess." "So you understand as well as anyone what something like this can do to a career." Jamie nodded still not seeing where she was leading. Her tone was not unkind, but certainly was insistent. "Far be it for me to make accusations. But a relationship with Justin could do much to further your own career. God knows, it's done Britney wonders on just the rumor alone." Jamie made negating gestures with his hands. "I assure you, that there's..." Lynn cut him off. "Oh, no, I'm not saying that's what you are doing. I was only making an observation. You are both so young and have such promising careers ahead of you. Justin's could be completely ruined if this got out, you both know that. You would have some rough times, of course, but come out of it no worse for wear." Lynn stood and walked over to him. Jamie's eyes widened. 'So this was her train of thought.' The fame card. "I'm sorry, Jamie, but you must understand that it's for the best for both of you to just let Justin go and him the same. Your relationship can only cause problems for him and the others too. I don't want to be mean about this but I have to look out for my son's livelihood and those of the other boys." Jamie stood on shaky legs. His conversation with JC earlier in the day totally shredded by Lynn's arguments. What was he thinking? Was he so blinded that he couldn't see that he could be the cause for the destruction of 'NSync. "I hope you see it my way and just walk away from this. You're a handsome, smart boy, I know you'll find someone else. I just cannot allow your relationship with my son to continue." Jamie's happy little world he had created for himself shattered at that point and he lost control. "I'm sorry to intrude in your home, Lynn," he said in a quivering voice. He wanted to yell and scream but knew that wouldn't make it any better. His dream popped into his head suddenly. 'Choose' the ghostly voice had said. He needed to leave, get out and think. "But I think I should be going now." Wiping the tears from his eyes he ran from the room sobbing. He went out the front door, slamming it as he went. Justin ran into the room at the sound of the door slamming. The others were right behind him. "Mom, where's Jamie?" Lynn put her hands on Justin's shoulders. "Justin, listen. I think this is for the best. I told him that your relationship could never work. It would never fit with the band and only bring you and the others harm." JC, Chris and Dani sucked in a breath as Joey swore quietly. "You WHAT!!" Justin screamed. "Justin don't raise your voice to me!" Lynn threatened her voice going up a little. "I can't believe you did that! How dare you interfere with my life that way. Don't you think that who I love should be my decision?" He shrugged off his mothers hands from his shoulders and drew himself up to his full height. Lynn shook her head sadly. "Justin, I'm just thinking about you and your future." "To hell with my future, Jamie is my life! Do you remember what it felt like when you fell in love with Dad? With Paul? That's how -I- feel right now. I poured my heart out to you and introduced you to the person I want to spend the rest of my life with and you try to break us up?" Justin was sobbing in between his words. "I don't know you anymore. You say you love me, but then you go and deliberately break my heart!" "Justin, I was just trying to save you the pain of what Randall and I went through." Lynn was crying now too. "Oh?" Justin questioned evilly. "And if Grandma came to you when you fell in love with Dad and told him to go away and said it was for your own good, what would you say?" Lynn looked away in shame. Little did Justin know her mother had tried that very trick and it went about as well as right now. She turned her attention back on Justin, he wasn't finished yet. "I know that Jamie and I may not work in the long haul. There's no guarantees. But I want to try because I think he's the one and I love him and that is enough for me." Lynn stared at Justin her mouth working. She didn't realize the extent of the maturity of her son and had badly underestimated him. "That's right. Think about that. I'm going out to find him and I may or may not ever be back. But I swear this, if anything happens to him, I'll never forgive you." Justin ran for the door. "Never!" he screamed one last time the slamming door marking his exit. Lynn fell rather than sat into a chair. "Boys, Dani, I've made a terrible mistake. Go help him, please?" JC, Joey, Chris and Dani silently ran after Justin leaving Lynn Harliss weeping in her living room. `What have I done,' she repeated over and over to herself. tbc... There's the latest. Comments and suggestions are always welcome! Jim bangoremail@aol.com