Aloha, Aloha, Aloha! It's Monday, you all should be thrilled. What I find odd is that nearly everyone dreads Monday and Tuesday, however, they are the only days I have off work. Which also means I get to write...WOOHOO!

Ok, I am going to make this quick. I would like to thank everyone for reading and sending me e-mail. E-mail is always I would like to give a special thank you to Jill. She gave me so much info on JC, I am a Lance person myself. Things change...

Also, I know this isn't exactly flowing with the way things actually happened with their tour. I am just writing as to how I want it to be. So their tour ended on a Saturday instead of Thursday.

Disclaimer: Dun Dun Dun... <18 Shame on you...>18 Enjoy :)

I have to pee. GRRR! Ok, I am back now... Funny Story, then I will get to the story. So I wake up this morning at ten. It's eleven right now. Anyway, my dad has a construction business and today he had this guy here that he just hired. I didn't know he was here, so I just walk out of my room in my boxers and a t-shirt. Yeah, so, this guy is pretty good looking, however, I need my time in the morning to be in my boxers and stuff, come on guys, everyone walks around in their underwear before getting dressed and stuff. Yeah so that was embarrassing. Yes, sad, I know, I live with my parents.

Just Around The River Bend

Chapter 6

Maybe in a Perfect World

"Because I never thought I would be able to wake up to your face, to your voice, to you. Now that I have, I never want to wake up without you." He said quietly. Oh boy. Did he realize what he just said? God, he made me melt right there. He was so sweet. So kind. I wasn't expecting what happened next. He kissed me. It wasn't like an open mouth kiss or anything. Just a peck. Figures though that I would be the one to pull away.

"Josh, what are you doing?" I asked him, as I pulled away from him. Come on boy, snap into reality. Welcome to earth.

"Oh God, I am so sorry Jeff. I didn't...I wasn't..." Josh said, with his right hand over his mouth. I think he was just as shocked as I was. He jumped out of bed and ran into the bathroom and slammed the door shut. As if I hadn't had enough drama for one twenty four hour period. I think I am really starting to miss my old boring life.

I just sat there on the floor for a few minutes. Stunned I believe is the word. He is a great guy, I will give him that. However, I don't want to start a relationship that won't work. I don't want to start a relationship period. Afraid of commitment? No. Afraid of getting burned yet again? Yes. I just went through my head what I should do and at eleven fifteen Josh decided to grace me with his presence. He stood there in the door way. Yup, he'd been crying. I made the boy cry. GRR!

"I...I...I just don't know what to say." He said. Well join the club. "I like you Jeff. I like you a lot. I can live with that. I can never have you. I think that's what makes it hard. Your straight and I'm gay. I shouldn't have let myself do this. I am really sorry for doing what I did, I couldn't help it. God Jeff, I am so sorry." Josh said. He had tears now running down his face. He wasn't sobbing, it was just a quiet cry. Time to take the plunge Jeff. I got up off the floor and walked to Josh. I pulled him into a hug cause it looked like he needed one. He hugged back.

"Josh." Oh boy, here I go. "I guess I should come clean. I think I am starting to like you a lot too."

"Wait." He said and broke the hug. "Are you..." I interrupted him.

"Yes, I'm gay. Jeffery Samuel Cooper is gay." I said. Josh looked confused. He just stood there and let it all sink in. Everything is just so unexpected.

"So what are you doing after the concert tonight?" He asked me, a smile appearing on his face. I believe this is the first time I saw a smile on his face since last night when we were exercising.

"I was planning on getting some well needed sleep. Why?" I asked. I know, I know. Seriously, I was not playing stupid, it's natural.

"Well, the guys are gonna go to some clubs, but, do you maybe want to grab a bite to eat somewhere?" He asked me. Was he asking me on a date?

"Are you asking me on a date?" I asked, I smiled.

"Yup." He said.

"Well, I accept." I said. Boy was this boy happy. He pulled me into a hug and squeezed quite hard. I always have to rain on the parade.

"Whoa, wait a minute." I said and got out of the hug.

"How can we go on a date, you're JC, you're N Sync, you're supposedly straight." I said, looking at him straight in the eyes.

"We are just two friends going out to have a good time, no one needs to know it's a date." He said. Ok, so he won.

"Alright babe, I'm game. So what time do you want me to meet you?" I asked. This was obviously going to be a late date. Seeing as though they had a concert tonight.

"How about I pick you up at 11:30?" He asked.

"That sounds fine to me. Then I can change and make myself look good for you." I said. Oh God, I was starting to get giddy.

"You already look good." He said and was about to kiss me. I wanted to kiss him so much. Maybe it's good though that we didn't. However, Lance has really bad timing.

"Are you two alive?" Lance asked through the door as he knocked. I got up and opened the door.

"Yeah Yeah, we're fine. Just talking." I said to Lance.

"Alright. Well we have to get going at one and it's quarter to noon right now." Lance said to the both of us. I think he was totally oblivious to the fact that he had interrupted something.

"Thank you Lance." Josh monotonously said to Lance.

"No Problem." Lance said. He smiled and walked back to his room. I had to get my briefcase before I met Karen and I also wanted to brush my teeth and freshen up a little.

"Well Josh, I have to meet Karen at noon. I will see you at 11:30." I said to Josh and started walking out the door.

"Actually, you will see me soon. Karen, you, me and the rest of the guys all ride together in the limo." Josh said. He had this smile that would not go away.

"Awesome. So I'll see you in a bit." I said this and walked out the door.

"I'll save you a seat." Josh yelled from inside the room. How cute was that. I had to call Jill. I tell her everything. After going into my room and freshening up I found my cell phone and dialed Jill's number. I knew she wouldn't be home right now. She was helping the old people or something like that. Sorry, it's the elderly, my bad. It rang four times and then I got her answering machine.

"It's Jill. I am not here right now. Leave me a message and I'll get back to you when I get around to it. Love ya bunches! BEEP." I heard Jill's recorded message say to me.

"Hey hun, it's Jeff. Oh my God, I have so much stuff to tell you. I have a date tonight after I finish the concert. I have a date! This is so exciting. I am incredibly giddy right now. Don't tell anyone though. I will call you with the details later on. Bye.!" I said and then pressed end. I had three minutes to get to the elevators. My last free moments for the rest of the day. This was gonna be long day, I thought as I walked down the hall towards the elevators.

Chapter 7

Nothing's What it Seems

I made it to the elevators and who was there waiting for me, a woman I would presume to be Karen. She had glasses and shoulder length hair. Monica Lewinski style hair, only hers was blonde. She was maybe 5'8". Before I could even get out one word she extended her hand and spoke to me.

"Jeffery Cooper I presume." She said as we shook hands.

"Jeff, please. You must be Karen Mills." I said as our hands parted.

"Karen, yes." She said with a business smile on her face.

"It's a pleasure to meet you." I said as she pushed the down button for the elevator.

"Pleasure is all mine." She said. There was a moment of silence.

"So, what is the game plan for today?" I asked.

"I like that, ready to jump right in, shows good workmanship." She said as we entered the elevator. She pressed the button for the lobby.

"Thank you." I said. She didn't seem all that mean.

"Well today we have to get you set up in your office, if you will. It's just a small desk with a lap top on the guys bus. You will ride with them and I ride with the body guards. After that we will go to the Gardens for a rehearsal. That will be followed by at four with a meet and greet that lasts to five. A meet and greet is basically when we give the fans a chance to meet the guys and ask questions and get autographs. At five we will have a dinner break till seven. The guys must be back to the venue at seven, that's your responsibility. Keep an eye on them. If they get mobbed, you need to be the impolite one so they can keep their pleasant reputation. The show is on from eight till ten. After that the night is yours." She said to me. While she did her speech we got off the elevator, saw a mob of screaming girls and found their bus which was parked behind the building.

"Well it sounds like we have an action packed day." I said.

"We do. Trust me. Don't feel overwhelmed. You get use to it." She said and smiled as she fumbled through her keys.

"What do I do during the show?" I asked.

"You stand on the side of the stage and watch. Any problems you will get a call through your headset to go and do what you have to do. You lead them back to the dressing room when they have costume changes and you make sure they make it on stage in the right amount of time." She said. I think she had a little too much coffee that morning.

"Well I think I will be able to do my job and do it well." I said as She finally found the key to open the bus. She lead the way on. Jill would spaz if she was here right now. This is like where they spent a lot of their time. How fun.

" I am sure you will. Johnny wouldn't have picked you if he wasn't sure of you." She said. I just smiled. "This is your desk." She said as she pointed to the extended dashboard right at the door. It confused me until she pointed out everything. She closed the door and pulled out a chair that was hidden in a cupboard next to the steps. Pretty cool. The laptop was sitting on the "desk".

"Pretty neat." I said as she motioned for me to sit in it.

"The bus is equipped with wireless internet access. Let me show you the rest of the bus." She said and started walking toward the back of the bus. "This is the kitchen/eating area. These are the only windows on the bus that are not totally blacked out from the outside. They are just tinted." She said. I was just taking this in. She continued through a door and there was a hallway with a room on each side. "To the right is the bathroom. To the left is a closet." Pretty self explanatory I think. We continued and entered the bunking area. "These are where the guys sleep. There are six bunks and cupboards for luggage." She said as she pointed out the spaces where 2 more bunks would fit and were instead large cupboards with each guys name on it. Dude, my name was on one. "I assume they got bored on the way here or something." She said as she noticed my name. We continued to the very back of the bus. "This is the game room. TV, games, whatever. It's where they usually relax." She said. It was a nice room with a large couch in the shape of a U.

"This is really nice." I said. I had traveled by bus before. It was a miserable experience as far as I am concerned. This bus would make traveling fun.

"Yeah it is." She said as we walked back up to the front of the bus. "You are the lucky one." She said. I didn't get it.

"What do you mean?" I asked curiously.

"We start the European tour a week from today. Since it costs so much to fly four buses over seas they are just flying this one and then they are going to load us all onto a 45 passenger deluxe motor coach. The guys and you however, stay in this bus." She said.

"How long are we in Europe?" I asked. We sat down and she took two bottles of water out of the refrigerator and gave me one.

"We will be there for about four weeks." She said as she took a sip of water.

"That's so cool. Where in Europe are we going?" I asked. Yeah, I know, so, I'm curious.

"The bus fly's into Paris. We have four shows in London, back to back, then we have two days off and fly to Paris. There are two shows in Paris. We then drive overnight to Brussels and have a show there and then it's off to Berlin for two shows. We have a day off in Berlin and then a day and night drive to Munich. We have a day off in Munich and then two shows. We stay in Munich for five days for rest. We continue to Rome for two shows and then drive to Madrid where we close off the European tour and come home." She said. She didn't seem to thrilled.

"That sounds like so much fun. I love Europe." I said in excitement.

"I was with BSB in Europe a little while back. It was pure hell. The paparazzi and tabloids are absolutely horrible. It's non-stop once we get there." She said and then glanced down at her watch.

"It's ten to one. We have to get going." She said and got up. We walked off the bus and back into the hotel. We went up to the floor and the guys were waiting for the elevator. When the door opened I was not expecting the family like bond they had with Karen.

"Oooooh look, it's Karieanne." Chris screeched.

"You ever call me that again and I will smack you." Karen said in mock anger. Everyone laughed and we all loaded onto the elevator. Once the doors closed I immediately smelled a rank smell. Someone had gas. Right as I noticed this I heard everyone except Joey yell in unison.


"Hey, come on, a guys gotta do what a guys gotta do." Joey said trying to defend himself.

"God man, it smells like something died and crawled up your ass." I said trying to fit in. My comment was welcomed whole heatedly by five laughing people. Well five, Joey didn't like it too much, but he laughed anyway. We heard the ding that we had landed.

"This is your first taste of the fun, enjoy it Jeffy." Justin said and punched me in the arm playfully. I didn't quite understand it then but I did as soon was we made our way through the Lobby. All I heard was screaming. There were eight big men waiting for us at the doors. One of them gave me a headset with a receiver and a transmitter.

"Hi, I am Mike. Put this on." He said. I listened and put it on and turned the contraption on. Karen already had hers on.

"Thank you." I said to mike. As soon as I turned it on I heard Karen start talking.

"Alright everyone, this is it. Mike already did the check off. Tom, is everyone in your van?" Karen spoke very professionally.

"All present and accounted for." Tom said.

"Good. Lisa, everyone with you?" Karen asked another van driver.

"I'm good to go." Lisa said.

"Casey, everyone with you?" Karen asked.

"As soon as I get the guards we are ready." Casey said. Casey is a guy.

"Ok. We are ready. Here we come." Karen said. She moved the mouth piece away and a looked at me.

"What do I do?" I asked. I was clueless.

"Take up the rear. I'll lead, you make sure we don't leave anyone behind." She said to me.

"It's not as bad as it looks, it'll be ok." I heard Josh say to me as he squeezed my hand really quick.

"Thanks." I said. The line was single file. Karen, Joey, Justin, Lance, Chris, Josh, and me. The screaming was enough to deafen someone. We all made it into the limo and we left relatively quickly. I sat down next to Josh. Besides for him saving it for me, it was the only open seat. I didn't do anything but sit there the whole way to the venue. They talked and so did I. It was mostly small talk or details about tonight and they mentioned HBO a couple times. We got there and went in the back so we didn't have to get mobbed. The rehearsal was kinda boring. Supposedly Josh was showing a big improvement from yesterday, or so the director guy said. After rehearsal they did their meet and greet which was really a bunch of girls asking the guys to marry them. I had the honor of ending it which I did gladly. The girls were sad, a few cried because "Justin touched me" or "JC knew my name". JC knew your name dear because you have a name tag on. I wanted to say that to her but I am not a totally heartless bastard. Dinner followed the meet and greet. It was chicken something or other. Really good. I was invited to sit with the guys and I did. We talked and I got to know them all a little better. They were all going to spend the week off at home. Karen informed me that I had a plane to catch Wednesday afternoon. Great. She also informed me that I got to help load a cargo plane with all the junk they needed for the performances. The guys went into their dressing room to change and Karen and I discussed what I had to do during the show. My headset thing was on my head again at 7:45. I got to lead them to the stage and I squeezed Josh's hand before he got hoisted up. He smiled at me. The show went good as expected. I missed most of it because this stage girl kept talking to me. It didn't concern me too much though, I would be doing this for a while. Hopefully. After the show there was a short press conference and then we were all back in the limo headed for the Hotel. It was 10:45 when we left.

"Halleluiah, a week off." Lance said as he leaned his head back on the seat.

"Yeah Lance, a week off and then hell in Europe." Chris said, not all that enthusiastically.

"Yeah, Chris is right." Karen said. They all mumbled.

"So who wants to go clubbin?" Justin asked. Everyone was immediately revitalized by that word.

"I do." Joey said.

"I'll go." Lance said.

"Count me in." Chris said.

"I am just gonna stay back." Josh said. He got a lot of questioning looks from everyone. "I just don't feel like doing much tonight." He said which they all believed.

"I will go. I need to have some fun." Karen said. Everything was quiet and then eveyone looked at me.

"What?" I asked.

"Well?" Justin asked.

"Well what?" I asked.

"Well are you going with us?" Justin asked.

"I didn't know I was invited." I said.

"Of you're invited. You're part of the family now." Chris said, they all nodded.

"As tempting as it sounds, I need some sleep. Next time ok?" I said.

"Come on! It'll be fun." Lance said.

"Yeah, we'll show you a good time." Joey added.

"Thank you, honestly though. I am just not in a clubbing mood right now." I said.

"Alright, but if you change your mind..."Lance said.

"Thanks, I'll keep that in mind." I said. The rest of the ride was spent in silence. I was starting to get the butterflies. I hadn't dated in a long time. I don't really know what I was expecting from this, it's just a date. When we got to the hotel we dealt with the mob again and went up to our rooms. It was five after eleven. Justin said something about meeting at the elevators in fifteen minutes. Everyone went to their respectable rooms. I showered and got ready for my date. I brushed my teeth for like five minutes. I am like a major teeth freak. At 11:27 there was a knock on my door. A date that's actually on time. One point for Josh.

Chapter 8

Nothing's Perfect

"Hello beautiful" he said. He pulled a dozen roses from behind his back. How did he manage to get these?

"Aww, thank you." I said. I gave him a kiss on the cheek. "Let me put these in something and then we can go ok?" I said.

"Sounds good to me." he said and stood in the doorway. There was a vase with fake flowers sitting on the night stand. I took the fakes out and filled it with water and put my flowers in it. Josh just stood there and watched my every move. I could tell he was happy. He just stood there and smiled.

"Alright, I am ready." I said as I walked towards the door. He just smiled and kept looking at me. "What, is my zipper down or something?" I asked.

"Nope, just watching you." he said.

"Oooh. Someone is trying to score some points with me." I said as we walked out the door. "Keep it up, it's working." I said. He laughed and we left the hotel. The mob of screaming girls vanished. There were a few police outside the hotel. I put two and two together.

"Is it alright if we take a cab?" He asked me.

"Sure." I said. "Sounds good to me." We both stood there in silence as he hailed a cab. We got in and he told the driver where to go. Some cafe on Broadway. We didn't talk to each other in the cab because we had an old smelly woman driving the cab that recognized him. So it was a long boring car ride. He signed something for her daughter and we got out and I paid the driver before he got the chance.

"I made us reservations earlier. We should have some privacy. Brit told me about this place." He said as we walked in. It was dimly lit. The people there were all in private conversations. It was an expensive place. He walked up to the host.

"Do you have a reservation?" The old man asked us.

"Yes, for Chasez." Josh said.

"Right this way." The old man said as he picked up two menu's and took us to a somewhat secluded corner booth.

"Thank you." I said as he seated us. He left and we were finally alone, well as alone as possible. There was a silence. I wouldn't call it uncomfortable, but it wasn't comfortable. We were looking at the menu's. I had made my decision, cappuccino.

"Brit says they have really good muffins here." Josh said. He was trying so hard.

"Josh...You don't." I was interrupted by the damned waitress.

"Hi, my name is Candy, I will be your server today, can I get you two anything?" She said with a smile a mile long on her face. Whenever I hear the name Candy I think stripper or prostitute. Not like there is much different between the two anyway.

"Can we have a couple minutes please?" Josh asked. Damn him, I need my coffee.

"Certainly sir." Candy said and then walked away.

"What were you going to say?" Josh asked me. He seemed like he really wanted to know.

"I was just going to say that you don't have to try so hard. Just be comfortable, I won't bite. It's just a date. Not as though your life depends on it." I said to him softly.

"Sorry. I am just a little nervous. Dating isn't really my thing." He said, forcing a smile.

"Don't apologize. It's sweet. Now what will you be having?" I asked.

"I was going to get a Cappuccino. How about you?" He asked me.

"The same, but I want a croissant too. My mom always made homemade croissants when I was growing up. Nothing beats her cooking." I said, at first I was smiling but then my smile diminished when I thought of my mom disowning me.

"You should try Lance's mom's cooking. She makes like really good food." He paused and looked at me. "What's wrong?" he asked me.

"Sorry." I said snapping out of it. "It's nothing, just been a long day." I lied.

"Yeah, I know the feeling." He said.

"So do you have any more family besides a mom?" He asked me. Of course or Stripper/Prostitute/Waitress Candy came back.

"Have you two decided what you'd like to order?" She asked.

"Two cappuccinos and two croissants please." Josh said.

"Alrighty, I'll get that for you." Candy said. She took our menu's and left again.

"Yeah, I do. I have two older sisters, Karen and Eva, they are 24 year old twins. I have two younger brothers, Scott is 18, and Kevin is 16. I also have my dad. How about you?" I asked.

"Yeah, I have my parents and a brother and sister. Heather is 22 and Tyler is 19." He said.

"That's cool." I said.

"Ok, I feel dumb asking this, but where are you from?" Josh asked sheepishly.

"It's ok." I said laughing a little. "I don't know where you are from either, I am from Augusta, Maine. Where are you from?" I asked.

"I am from Washington D.C." he said. "Are you gonna go visit while you are up here?" He asked me.

"No." I said. "Right now I think it would be best if I kept my distance from them."

"Why?" he asked. Candy is such a flake I swear.

"Here is your cappuccinos and croissants." She said as she sent them down on the table.

"Thank you." I said.

"Thanks." Josh said. Candy felt that she was unwelcome and left.

"Because right now the only one that doesn't hate me is my sister Karen." I said to him. I wasn't going to hide this.

"I am so sorry. Why do they hate you?" He asked.

"Because I came out to them about a month ago and they didn't like it. My parents disowned me." I said and started to cry. Josh saw how upset this was making me. Before I came out me and my parents never had any problems. We had the perfect family. They were ultra conservative though.

"Do you want to get out of here?" Josh asked. I nodded. He threw a twenty down on the table and we left. He didn't make any contact with me until we got outside. He pulled me into a hug and I started sobbing in his shoulder.

"I am so sorry I am doing this. It just hurts so much." I said.

"It's ok babe." He kissed me on the head. "I understand." It felt so good to hear him say those words. He hailed a passing cab and we both got in. It was well after 12:30 and we had a non English speaking cab driver so we were relatively safe. I made my way all the way to the other side.

"Thank you Josh." I said to him, still crying.

"Why are you sitting way over there?" He asked me.

"Because I don't want to make a scene." I said

"Don't worry about it." He said and pulled me over to him. He wrapped his arm around me and pulled me in close. It was so comfortable to lay my head on his chest.

"This feels so good Josh. Thank you." I said. The tears were subsiding.

"Thank you, for making me happy again." He said smiling. I smiled back at him and right as we were about to kiss I saw the headlights and then felt the cab suddenly fly across the intersection into the oncoming traffic...


Will Josh Live? Will Jeff Survive? Will batman save the day? hehe...Stay tuned...

Hope you enjoyed. Have A Great day. E-mails always welcomed ... ... sorry it's late, I had to move and I just got it out when I could.