Date: Fri, 6 Aug 1999 17:35:03 EDT From: Mlnscrm@aol.com Subject: Justin's Love 9 * Hey peeps. :) What's up? Well, here I am again. I know... waiting for me * to go away yet? lol Well, here is part 8... no wait 9. Had to check * there. :) I am glad it is getting up there. So, here are the little * sayings. Thanks to everyone. I have come to depend on some many people and * have made so many new friends because of this story it would be pointless * to name them all. Don't have that much time. So, if you are a * friend... Thanks. Thanks to David for being a cool guy all together and for * putting these stories up. That means a lot. Thanks to those who e-mail me * and those who have given me criticism.. THANKS!! I appreciate it. If you * think I can do better I would love for you to tell me how. And thanks to * all the readers who, talked to ya or not, are important to me. As for the * usual... this is not meant to imply anything about anyone that is * mentioned. This is all fiction, (no matter how we hope). And the legal * stuff... follow it. You know it. It is all over this site and pretty much * everywhere else ya turn today so... no need for me to waste time doing * it. Well... on we go. Recap of last chap.: "Well, we could all go to the roller coaster then. I don't mind riding it again and none of you have ridden it yet." Joey said not knowing he was the only one yet to know of mine and Justin's relationship. "NO!" Justin said instinctively. He stepped back after he said that receiving looks from everyone, including me. I wanted the guys to now, and I wanted everything out, and I wanted to show my love for Justin in front of the guys, but not like this. I didn't want them to find out like this. Not that it was all that big of a deal. JC and Lance already knew about us, and Justin didn't know it but Chris knew too. So, Joey was the only one finding out big news, but still. I knew this would be a problem. "What was that for?" Joey asked as he looked at Justin. "Ummm... maybe we should be alone..." Justin said pointing at Stephanie. She looked up and sighed. "I guess I will be over there." She said getting up. She didn't leave however, before kissing Lance on the cheek. JC had to turn his head away in disgust. That was a whole thing JC didn't want to deal with right now. "So, what's up?" Joey asked as they all huddled up together. "Well...." * Also, before I start... the format above where a new paragraph will be used from now on. I have gotten some e-mail about that and I should have started like this. Sorry to all those who have been putting up with my leaning how to write these stories. lol Now.. on with the story. Justin's Love Part 9 :It was the best of times, it was the worst of times. "Well..." Justin started as he tried to explain to the rest of the guys, well really just Joey, about himself and us. He knew this was going to happen. He had just told JC not an hour ago, that this was going to come out today when he said he wanted to spend time with just me. "Well. We have established the whole well thing. Next word please." Joey said impatiently. Chris and JC looked at him while Lance's head only popped up every once and awhile to hear what was going on. Justin looked at him frustrated and began again. "Well, I guess this all needed to come out. I want to go with Christopher now, because I... I want to be with him." Justin said very nervous. I knew that wasn't going to cut it for Joey who still looked puzzled. Before anyone could speak Chris stood up. "Listen Curly. If you are going to explain this then you will have to be clearer." Chris said a little to my surprise. That was not the supporting words I was expecting to hear from the guy that I had just spent all day explaining all I could. Justin sighed and Chris took that for what it was. A silent saying that said, `You say that like it was easy.' Chris soon followed. "And whatever it is... we are with you." Justin looked at him with sadness, and again Chris spoke up. "Whatever." Chris finally said hinting to Justin that he knew what was going on. He immediately turned to me and I nodded. The look I got was `Does he know?'. And I knew it might be a little easier for him to explain this if it was just Joey he had to worry about. He looked at me shocked and a, `We'll talk about this later.' look before he started again. "Well, then. I want to be with Christopher... because I am with him. Like together. In love." Justin said staring directly at Joey. He was waiting for what was sure to be a show. Joey just sat there with a dumbfounded look. "Don't tell me I need to make it clearer than that." Justin said trying to liven the mood with no success. I could tell this was hard and I couldn't take it any longer to let him be up there by himself. I stood up and went to his side. He looked at me and smiled. I was tempted to just hold him and tell him everything was OK, but I thought it best to at least wait for whatever Joey was going to do. I was by his side and that was all I could do for now. "You mean... you mean you are gay?" Joey asked more in a tone of I know what you are saying I am just shocked. "Listen, I know this might be a little hard to understand and I completely understand if you have a problem with it, but I am not going public or anything. This isn't going to like ruin the group or anything." Justin shot out quickly. Joey stood up and looked at him with utter disbelief. "You just told me you were gay and you think that I am worried about the group. I always thought we were better friends than that." Joey said as he sat back down and turned his head from Justin. We were all a little shocked by this statement as I even saw Lance's eyes avert from the ground, and JC, where they had remained most of the time. "So, this means you don't care?" Chris said breaking the silence. His responsible side taking over. I knew that I had been right before. Lance might have been the business head, and kept everyone on time and in the right place, but Chris kept everything in line. Joey looked up and turned to Justin. Well, really, he turned to us. He smiled as he shook his head. "No, it is a little weird. And will defiantly be strange at first, but if you are sure and you are happy, then it is not my place to approve or disapprove. Care or not care." He said finally turning to Chris. We all smiled at that. I think that was the first time I heard Justin breathe since he started talking. I wrapped my hands around his waist and smiled. He returned the hug and was about to kiss me on the fore head, (me being just an nice shorter) before he remembered we were in public. We turned to see all of them smiling at us. Even Lance and JC were allowing a little smile to comment on this moment. "Well, now that that is over. I guess we should be on are way." Justin said trying to get out of there as fast as he could. Even though things had gone well, it was still an uncomfortable situation for those who all this was referring. Which was not just me and Justin. I knew Lance and JC had to be thinking they should say something. Maybe not about what was going on between them but how they felt. Well, JC should of at least. Get it all out. Lance I might understand keeping quiet considering I don't think he knew what the hell he felt. However, they both stayed quiet. Chris on the other hand did not. "Justin. I think maybe there is something else." Chris said stopping us as we turned around. Justin got tense and I knew he was wondering what Chris was referring too. Everyone looked from Justin to Chris waiting for someone to answer. Justin turned to me with question in his eyes. "I... I think he means next week. As in what happens?" I said trying to hint to Justin with out getting looks from Joey. Justin looked at me, no more with confusion with surprise and a hint of anger too. "He knows that too!?!" Justin said throwing his arms in the air. He backed away and looked at me. I dropped my head and felt as if I had betrayed him or something. It was just so easy to talk to Chris. As Chris heard this he sat back down thinking it a mistake to have said something. "Yeah. I told him, because he asked what would happen next week. And we would of had to tell him anyway. Besides, he figured out on his own about us, so don't go implying I have been opening my mouth to everyone who went by." I said very defensive. I didn't see his problem. This needed to be addressed anyway. "Well, what about next week?" Joey asked feeling very left out. He had semi figured JC and Lance knew what was going on better than anyone because of their absolute quietness, and Chris seemed to have known everything from me, but Joey was just finding out. "Next week, when we go on tour... I want to bring..." Justin trailed off as he saw Joey get the point. "Christopher." Joey got nods from all of us as he nodded as well. "Oh." Joey said as he sighed. Justin and I both waited for something a little more from Joey but it never came. "So, you are OK with that?" Justin asked as he looked at everyone this time. "Whatever makes ya happy Justin." JC said looking at Lance briefly. "Ya know I'm with ya Baby J!" Chris said as he playfully punched Justin's arm. "I don't have a problem with it." Lance said as he caught JC's eyes on him before he returned to his view of the ground. "Like I said before, if you are sure and you are happy, I am with you too." Joey said getting everyone's vote. "I just don't know what management will say." Joey said as he took into an account I don't think either of us were prepared to deal with. "Hey, we will deal with that later. Now, all that matters is we are all cool, and we are all here to have some fun. So, just everyone go where ya want to. We have the whole week together and I am sure we can stand to not be together all day today. We have three months after this to spend quality time, or whatever shit we come up with. So, for now, I think we all just need to relax whatever we can." Chris said again showing his fatherly said to the group. There was little disagreement as we all nodded. Everyone started to separate once again finding out what ever one else was doing. "Hey JC. Me and Christopher are gonna head out and as much as I wanted to be alone, I don't want you stuck dealing with anything by yourself, and I don't want you stuck with Lance and his new air head." Justin tried to comfort his friend as we prepared to head out. "J, I will be fine. It is no big deal. Now, go. Catch up to your man before he things you are cheating on him or something." JC said smiling. Justin quickly shook the thought of cheating out of his mind and made his way towards me. "Hey, Chris. I am going to go ride the coaster again. You wanna come with me?" Joey asked as he saw Chris not really finding someone to go off with. "Yeah, I guess. Sure. Let's go do it!" Chris said as he thought about what he had just witnessed. I guess even through his thoughts being true didn't really help him deal with the fact that it was true. It was a pretty weird thing to have to get used to. Especially if I came along for the tour. The next year was going to be tough. They had to tour for the next three to four months, and then they got a little Christmas break. Chris could already tell that things were going to get difficult. Not to mention that thing that still lingered about JC and Lance. After what just happened, Chris's thoughts were headed, (on the correct path) to what was going on about JC and Lance. He prayed that was wrong. He shook this thoughts as he saw JC sitting by himself. He knew that Justin and I wanted to be alone, and he knew that JC didn't want to go with Lance. Well, he didn't want to go with Stephanie. I am sure Lance would have suited him just fine. "Hey JC. Me and Joey are heading to the roller coaster. Why don't ya hang with us?" Chris said as he approached JC. JC finally looked up from the ground and thought about what he said. "Nah, thanks Chris, but I think I am gonna just walk around and check things out for awhile." JC said wanting to think to himself. Chris didn't take that for an answer. He seated himself next to JC as Joey ran to get something to drink real quick. "JC, what is troubling you man?" Chris asked but stopped JC from answering as he continued to talk. "And don't tell me you are fine. I know there is something going on between you and Lance. I am not sure what, but it must be major considering that you want even look at each other, and Christopher can tell me everything that has gone on with him and Curly, but want go near what you and Lance are going through." Chris said kinda of surprising JC. "And I'm willing to bet that you have a problem not far from Justin and Chris's." Chris said to a stunned JC. Chris was so blunt about everything that JC couldn't help but start to tear up as he thought of everything that Chris had just said. Chris saw this and put his arm around JC. "Dude, I am sorry. I didn't mean to say it all like that. I just want to help you bro. I am here." Chris said getting on to himself inside for being so forward. He was just trying to help. JC smiled as he pushed back the tears. "Thanks Chris. I think I really needed to hear that. I just don't know if now is the best time..." JC said as he saw Chris waving his hands. "Say no more. Whenever you wanna talk or you need me, I am here." Chris said as he and JC hugged. "But until then, I really think that you should come with me and Joey." Chris said more as a, `you are coming no matter what,' than a `you should reconsider and come with us.' JC smiled and nodded his head. "All right. You talked me into it. Let's head out." JC stood and briefly saw Lance looking at him as he turned and started walking to Joey. `I don't even wanna deal with that today.' He thought to himself as he felt the urge that Lance wanted to talk to him. `Damn it. He saw me wanting to talk with him. He just walked away. I guess I can't blame him. I mean after all, there is...' Lance's thoughts were interrupted by Stephanie yelling for him. "Lance. Come on. You have had your little pow-wow. I am ready to get inside somewhere. This heat is bad for my hair." Stephanie complained as she remained with her bottled water where she had been since she was asked to leave while the guys talked. Lance sighed as he turned to her and started to walk over. "Well, what do you want to do now?" Lance asked as he could fell himself hollowing his last bit of dignity as he chose to remain with Stephanie and let JC walk away. "So, what do you think of the whole Christopher and Justin thing?" Joey asked as Chris, JC, and himself had started out towards the roller coaster. "What do you mean?" Chris said hoping that Joey wasn't just putting on a show for Justin and myself. He would have hater the thought of a member having a problem with whatever the other was doing to make himself happy. "I just mean, this is all weird. Justin is gay dude. Think about just the irony of that. Not to mention the fact that he wants to bring this Christopher guy along on tour with us. How do we know that this guy is for real. I know I don't wanna deal with Justin after he gets out of his first relationship with a guy who was using him." Joey said surpassing both JC and Chris. They knew, disguised in that little statement with the I don't really care attitude, was a guy worried about his friend. Chris smiled as he thought about how this may even bring the guys closer, having to deal with something like this. He knew, though, he had to reassure Joey's feelings about me. "Well, I will admit it is a little weird that Justin is gay. With the majority of the girls throwing themselves at him and leaving us with the scraps, it is ironic that he is the gay one of the punch. But hey, whatever makes him happy right. As for Christopher..." Chris said seeing Joey waiting to hear if he was siding with him or not. "I think he is a nice guy. Justin likes him so that says something right there. Justin and Christopher were friends before anything and we all know how picky Justin is with his friends. So, he is a decent guy. And I talked with him for a couple hours today and he told me pretty much everything that had happened, and it was Justin's idea for him to go on tour. He is still a little uneasy about it, so I don't think he is using anyone." Chris finally finished up leaving Joey happy that he was wrong. "Well, I am just glad that it is all out. I hate the thought of all of us keeping secrets from each other. Just because I really don't like all y'all, doesn't mean I don't love ya." Joey said playing around, but hurting JC inside. He had felt the urge to say something when Justin had his thing going, but it was just too difficult. That and the fact that he wasn't sure where he and Lance were, it was best if just kept quiet for awhile. He just didn't know how long awhile was going to be. They were about to head off on tour and that means you are around each other 24-7. It would be hard to keep something like this. Especially with Justin's secret out and Christopher possibly coming on tour. This was going to be difficult. "You know, I love you." I said as Justin and I walked around. We were going to head to a ride or something, but we juts couldn't spend all that time apart. We had to be careful while we were in public, but we had some freedom. Being in a line would have taken out that last little bit of freedom, and we weren't ready to give that up. "Well, I love you to. And I am glad that everyone is cool. I don't know if I could have handled them having a problem and this not happening." Justin said smiling at me as we walked over to a bench under some trees. It overlooked a river that was an outlet for the Jaws ride. "Well, you know, that it could still not happen. I hate to be the negative one here, but management could still say no. The guys could change their minds... you could change your mind." I said asking more than stating. He looked at me and just sat still. I felt odd as we sat there in silence. `What if he was changing his mind?' "What are you thinking?" I asked wondering if I had triggered something to make him doubt his decision to ask me to come along. I know that he had told me that he loved me, and he would never doubt that, and we would always be together, and I believed him. But just like the first time I asked him if he had doubts about us, I still felt like this was all a dream and I was going to wake up and everything would be the same. "I am thinking..." Justin said looking serious all of a sudden. "How I am going to keep in touch with you if someone does change their minds." He said smiling at me and draping one arm around me. I smiled as I got closer. I knew I had fallen in love. I had come to that realization a lot of times this past week that me and him have been together. Even though I knew we were together, and I was in love with him, certain moments made that feeling just come back like I realized I was in love for the first time. We were in an out of the way place, and we didn't draw to much attention to ourselves, so we decided to just be together. Like any two people in love. And there we sat looking out over the river, together. "Well, I have to say that was a pretty cool ride." JC said as he, Chris, and Joey stepped off the roller coaster. "See, I told ya. That is what you get for not believing in me." Joey said joking with the guys earlier comments. "Of course we trust ya Joey." Chris said right before turning to JC. "About as far as we could throw ya." He whispered as he got a smile out of JC. "So, what next? We only have three more hours before we need to head back and all." JC said looking at his watch. "I dunno. It is up to y'all." Chris decided on just going with the flow so to speak. "By the way, where are you all staying?" "Well, I was going to hang over at Justin's for a couple of nights, but seeing how Christopher is here, I guess I'll be camping back at home for the rest of the week." JC said as he thought about another week at home. He loved his parents, but to them, he was still a little kid. "What about you tow?" "Well, I am going to stay at my place like always with Chris." Joey said as he looked over at Chris. JC smiled as the irony came to him. Chris and Joey were the only two straight guys in NSYNC, (JC going on the assumption that Lance was gay) and yet they were the only two who lived with guys. "Yeah, I guess I am going to be staying home too." Chris sighed heavily. Joey looked at him as Chris smiled. They loved to tease each other. "But what about Lance? Is he staying with that... girl?" Chris sounded uneasy about that. "What is up with the... `that girl' thing? You don't like her?" Joey asked as he picked up on the sound of Chris' voice. Chris looked up at him and then at JC. He saw the sadness in JC's eyes and truthfully, didn't care too much for her if she had something to do with JC and Lance's conflict. "Nah, it is not that, I don't know her. I just think it is weird she is a part of the picture now." Chris couldn't look at JC as he said that. He had a very strong feeling what JC's feelings were towards her. "Well, I think it is good for Lance. I don't mind the gay thing, and I am totally cool with it, but it is nice to now some of us our still straight." Joey joked as they found themselves in line for Back to the Future. That is when it hit JC. He had never really taken in the thought of Lance and Stephanie together meaning he was straight. Maybe he didn't want to see it or maybe he thought it was just a thing, but it was becoming more self evident that this was it. Lance had been wrong. JC had been wrong. Everything was all wrong. At least to JC. "Yeah, I guess Lance will be with her, or her with him. Whatever, I think it is safe to say they will be together." Chris said watching JC carefully for any signs of anything. Hey found them too as he watched a single tear fall from JC's cheek. He knew then he had been right, JC was in love. Or wanted to be anyway with Lance. And same thing with Lance. But he looked more like he wanted to be in love with Stephanie. "Well, enough of all this seriousness stuff. Let's P-A-R-T-Y!" Joey yelled as the finished the very short line that ran through the large Back to the Future building. Justin and I had been sitting at the bench together for what seemed like forever as we heard approaching sounds behind us. "I thought I saw two people back here when we went on the Jaws ride." We both turned to see Chris with a bunch of souvenirs in his hands. "Yeah, it was just us." Justin said backing away from me. Even though the guys knew, I think it would be some time before Justin felt really comfortable with me with him in front of them. "Jeez, Chris! Every time we go to some park you get tons of pure crap. You have tons of souvenirs. What possessed you to think you needed more?" Justin asked standing, trying to get attention off of us I am sure. Chris looked at me as Justin walked towards him and I remained on the bench and I just shrugged my shoulders. I knew this was going to take time, us being together. I was willing to wait. "Well, you know me J. Anything to get you to bitch and moan." Chris playfully punched Justin's left shoulder. "So, I hope I didn't interrupt anything?" Chris said hinting pretty heavily he was waiting to hear he did. "I hate to disappoint ya Chris, but no show today." I said getting us and walking over to Justin. Justin looked shocked that I said that, however Chris just burst out laughing. "Darn, and I really wanted to see it too." We all laughed and started back towards the little opening to the bench we were at. "Anyway, all of us are going out tonight. Are you two joining us or.... will you be busy?" Chris said smiling a us with a evil grin. We both laughed at his constant insinuations that we were having sex every chance we got. "Nah, we will be there. But tomorrow we are going to busy." Justin said and I looked at him. The word busy had grown to mean sex within the last five minutes, so I wasn't sure what it was we would be busy doing. I had my hopes of course. Justin laughed at the stares he got from both me and Chris and started to explain. "I mean... that mean and Christopher are going to go talked to Andrew." Justin said a little uneasy towards the end of the statement. Chris immediately looked up with worry. "Oh, going to talk to management. You want us there to..." Chris said trying to be a good friend and be there for Justin and I. Justin looked at him and shook his head. "Nah, that's all right. I think it will go a little smoother if they don't know I have already come to you guys about it." Justin was trying to reassure himself more than anybody. He knew I had been right when I said that me and him on tour could still not happen. And that scared both of us to death. "Well, we will all be here if you need us. Both of you." Chris leaned forward as we walked at looked at me. "Thanks." I smiled. We met up with all the guys (and Stephanie) and we all went home for half an hour before we all went to eat. Well some of us went to eat. Lance called and said he and Stephanie were going to go on their on, JC called and said he would be eating at home, (me and Justin both knew he didn't want to deal with the reality of Lance being there... and the it would have ripped him apart to know that Lance wasn't there.), so it was just Joey, Chris, Justin, and myself. We had fun despite the missing people, and Chris and Joey, surprising, got to know us better. Us, as in me and Justin as a couple. "So, dating a guy. What is it like?" Joey asked as we came to the end of our dinner. "JOEY!" Chris said as Justin and I laughed at the question. "No, no, no. I wasn't trying to be rude or gross or anything... I am just curious as to what... what it is like. I never really been around anything like that." Joey said sincerely. "Oh come on. That is not true. What about the guy who song our song on Say What Karoke? They guy had a little crush on Joey." I said remembering that day that Justin had sang to me. "What?!? No he didn't. You are full of it." He said getting embarrassed. "No he is not. They guy was a little infatuated. `Joey's name should be atomic because he is DA bomb!" Justin said quoting the guy from the show. We all laughed and had fun that night. We pretty much all just goofed around the night. After dinner we went back to Justin's house, his mom being out of town on business, and we stayed up, talking, and catching up on some movies. Joey and Chris decided to leave around one and after that we hit the hay. "WOW! What a day huh?" Justin said as we walked into his room. "Yeah, it has been. But a good day at least." I walked up behind him and put my arms around his waist as we swayed back and forth. "So, when is your mom supposed to be back." I said breaking the silence. "She should be back tomorrow. I am not sure on what time. Why?" He walked towards his bed and turned back the covers. "Because... maybe we should sleep in separate rooms tonight. I mean, I would hate to think of your mom walking in on her baby boy in bed with little old' me." I said trying to make a joke out of something hard for me. I hadn't slept alone this whole week. Now, when everyone was being OK with us, and us going to management and asking them about the whole tour thing tomorrow, I had to be apart from him. He looked at me and sighed. "No, I don't think she will be in that early. And besides, I don't want you to." He pulled away from the bed and placed his arms back around. "I want to too. But, just for tonight, or until we get out of your mother's house, I think it would be best. I will be OK. I am a big boy." I said smiling at him. "Well, I suppose one night isn't going to kill us." Justin kissed me and them pulled away. "You are sure about this right?" He said half jokingly. I nodded, not too convincingly, as he finished the kiss. "I guess if you got to say good night, that is they way to do it." I said pulling way after about five minutes. "So, where are you shifting me to now?" I played around trying not to sound to disappointed that we would be apart. "Come on. It is this way. And don't even start that." He put his finger up and as I grabbed it he pulled me to the room next to his. "This is where JC usually stays, but I suppose you will have to do." "Ha ha ha. You are just a whole bucket of funny aren't ya?" I said as I began pulling back the bed this time. "You know me, I try." He said and then got a lot closer and more serious. "Things are going to work out, right? I mean, management will not have a big problem, all the guys are going to be cool, hell, maybe I even tell my mom." He said trying to convince himself more than me. I put my arms around his body and just held him. This was the best way I could comfort him. Tell him that yeah, everything would be fine. I just hoped as much as he did that we were right. Not to long of holding him, he had passed out and was sleeping right next to me. I wanted to just stay there, and hold him the rest of the night, well the rest of the early morning anyway. But I knew that things would get difficult if we were caught. I definitely didn't want to get off on the wrong foot with Justin's mom. I slowly untangled my arms from around his body, covered him up and went to go sleep on the couch down stairs. I still had my clothes on and didn't really need pillows, and this wasn't my house, so I decided to just crash out on the couch. That would have to do for tonight. "Well, I know I am sure glad to be home. How about you Jonathan? I bet your brother is home by now." Lynn said as she pushed open the doors to her home with piles of papers trying to be balanced. "Justin, Justin, Justin." Jonathan ran around screaming before he went upstairs. I slowly awakened with all the commotion coming from around the down stairs. As I stood up I noticed a female figure standing right at the door not moving. As my eyes came into focus I saw it was Justin's mom. "Oh, hi. You must be Mrs. Harliss. I am..." My voice was drown out by a scream. "Who are you? What are you doing in my house?" She yelled as she dropped her stuff down. `Oh, boy!' I thought as I waited for her to calm. TBC * OK, for one, sorry this is so short and late. I have been on vacation, I * still am, and right now I am writing this missing out of wave runners so * you all need to appreciate it. lol * Well, school starts for me next week, so from now on I will have a pretty * regular schedule on the stories. And they will all be longer. So, until * next time, send me your thoughts, and if ya just wanna chat my screen * name on AOL is mlnscrm for mail and Ims, and my ICQ number is.... well, I * don't have it on this computer so I don't really know. It is in one of * these others stories, so you can find it if ya want. Well, thanks to all * of you and thanks for your support. C-ya next time. And thanks Gary!