Date: Mon, 09 Oct 2000 20:02:09 GMT From: Elly Iles Subject: Little White Lies - 9 Chapter 9 Kevin looked over to Nick and stopped himself from sighing loudly. Had it only been a few hours ago since they had woken up side by side? The magic of last night had now almost completely faded for Kevin. True, it had been like nothing else, and Nick was everything he had hoped for, more than he had hoped for. But as Kevin lay awake afterwards thinking about it, he was suddenly struck with the seriousness of what he had done. He had taken away Nick's virginity through a web of deceit that he was no longer in control of, and what's more, he felt like crap about it. This morning had been awful. He had barely said two words to Nick, and Kevin had driven him back to his house in silence. Nick had been confused, naturally, but didn't question it. He would just occasionally look at Kevin with the most terrible look of anguish in his eyes, and Kevin knew, without a doubt, that the young man regretted it. Now they were flying out to California to do some promotion for a couple of days, and Kevin knew he was against this even more than the European tour. Nick looked so isolated, so lost, that Kevin just wanted to hug him, tell him everything would be okay. But he knew he couldn't, it wouldn't feel right anymore. He'd rather die than mess with Nick's innocence again. *** "Nick?" Brian caught Nick's arm as they walked up the hotel corridor. "Can we share?" "I don't think so." Nick's voice sounded choked with tears. "Oh shit, Nick, please? I'm so sorry about that phone-call, I felt like such crap afterwards." "It wasn't your fault." Nick carried on walking, refusing to look into Brian's eyes. "You're right, I do need to grow up." "No, you don't. If anything I do." Brian caught Nick's eye pleadingly. "Please, Frack?" "Oh, now you're gonna use that nickname that you know I can't resist." Nick managed a smile. "So is that a yes?" "I guess." Nick nodded. Brian smiled with happiness. He was going to get over himself on this trip. And hopefully, get over Nick too. *** Kevin looked round his hotel room. "Alone again." He sighed inwardly. It was going to be the title of his autobiography, he was sure of it. *** "AJ?" Howie sat down on his bed. AJ grunted in response. "Do you think something's up with Nicky and Brian?" "Like what?" AJ sat on his bed, facing Howie. "Well, I've got this kind of crazy notion which isn't actually all that crazy, in my opinion." "What the hell?" AJ asked, confused. "I've noticed something between the two of them. Or rather, from one of them." "Okay, D, spit it out, cos you're starting to give me a headache." "Brian, in my opinion, is in love with Nicky." "And you think this because...?" "Powers of deduction." Howie exclaimed. "I have a talent for things like this." He gave into AJ's questioning stare. "Well, okay, I overheard him and Kevin talking about it." AJ nodded, suddenly seeing Howie's mistake. "No, you've got it wrong. Kevin's in love with Nick, not Brian." "Huh?" It was Howie's turn to look confused. "No, it was definitely Brian." "But that's not possible." AJ shook his head. "Kevin told me himself he'd fallen for Nick." "It was defiantly Brian." Howie repeated. "They were talking in the hotel room, I overheard. Kevin asked Brian if he was gay, and Brian said something like 'I only realised it after I fell in love with Nick.' I'm not wrong about this, AJ." "Shit." AJ realised the seriousness of the matter. "Did Kevin tell Brian he was in love with Nick as well?" "Well, I didn't stick around." "Why the hell not?" "They were having a private conversation. Listening in would have been a total invasion of that." "Sometimes Howie, your morals make me feel sick." "At least I have some." "Shame you can't forget about them when you need to." "Okay, okay." Howie shook his head. "Arguing about this is stupid. All we know is both Brian and Kevin are in love with our youngest, and most vulnerable band member." "Well I know that Kevin would never hurt him. He loves him way too much." "Love can cloud rational judgement." Howie informed him. "We need to stop them before Nick gets hurt." "They wouldn't do anything to him. Hell, I know I can be a bastard sometimes, but not even I could ever hurt Nicky." "So what do you think we should do?" "Nothing." AJ told him. "Nick doesn't swing that way, so he can't get romantically involved with either of them." "I guess." Howie sighed. "But what if he does?" "We intervene. Until then we should just wait." *** This was a mistake, Brian told himself. I shouldn't have asked him to share rooms. How am I meant to get over him when I know he's sleeping in a bed right next to mine? His question remained unanswered as he listened to Nick's soft breathing. The others were all out exploring the nightlife California had to offer, and Brian was painfully aware that it was just the two of them. Stop it, he scolded himself. Stop thinking about him. He's your best friend, nothing else. A force that flung both him and Nick out of their beds suddenly interrupted his thoughts. "What was that?" Nick asked, his eyes wide. "It was a tremor, I think." Brian looked confused. "It must have been." "Pretty strong tremor." Nick rubbed his head. "Man, I hate earthquakes." "Did you hurt your head?" Brian stood up shakily and walked round to Nick. Nick shook his head, and then winced. "I just hit it on the floor. It's okay." "Are you sure?" Brian crouched down beside him. He could see Nick was about to say something, but didn't finish, as a second earthquake hit them. They watched with horror as the ceiling started to crumble, and then, as if in a dodgy disaster movie, but ten times more realistic, a major crack formed down the middle of the room. *** "WE HAVE TO FIND THEM!" Kevin shouted at the top of his voice as AJ and Howie held him back. The trio had been in a club at the time of the earthquake and had escaped unhurt. Kevin had proceeded to run back to the hotel with AJ and Howie hot on his trail. Now they were outside, and it fast became apparent that Nick and Brian were in a lot of trouble if they were still inside. "Kevin, you can't go in there." AJ told him desperately. "It's falling apart. You'll never make it to them." "I can't leave him." Kevin sobbed. "I can't let him die." "He won't. Nick's gonna be fine, so is Brian." AJ tried to soothe him. "I don't fucking care about Brian." Kevin wiped some tears away from his eyes uselessly. "He can die for all I care." He saw Howie and AJ looking at him in horror, but he no longer cared. Right now, his words were painfully true. "Take that back." Howie told him, his voice alarmingly quiet. "No." "TAKE IT BACK GODAMN YOU!" Howie screamed. "THAT'S YOUR FUCKING COUSIN YOU'RE TALKING ABOUT!" "I wish he was dead." Kevin told him, resigned. He slumped to the floor and let the tears flow freely. *** "Nick?" Brian whispered, then wondered why he was whispering. "Nick?" He called out, louder. "Mmm?" Nick stirred beside him. It was pitch black, and Brian could only just make out the boy. "Nicky, you okay?" "I wanna sleep." Nick moaned. Brian shook his head. That was not good. Nick was drifting in and out of consciousness, and if he fell asleep, there was a danger he wouldn't wake up. "You're not gonna do that, Nicky." Brian did his best to pull him up. Nick slumped against his shoulder. "Please Bri." Nick said sleepily. Okay, that was a good sign at least. He knew who he was with. "Nick, you have to stay awake. Stay awake for me, please." "It's too hard." "Nick, if you go to sleep you're not ever gonna wake up." Brian told him. "And you can't leave me, Nicky, you can't. I wouldn't be able to live without you." "I'll come back." Nick whispered. "Come on Frack." Brian shook him. "Stay alive for me." "Okay Frick." Nick sat up, trying to support himself. "I'll stay up." "Thank you." Brian choked out his words. "You think we're gonna get out of here alive?" "Yes." Brian told him. "We have to." He wiped away some tears. "And I don't care what you're going to say to me when I tell you what I'm about to tell you." He whispered. "But it's killing me not to, so I have to." "Huh?" Nick asked, his voice now a whisper. "Nick, I love you." "I love you too." "No, I don't mean like that. I don't mean as a friend, or a brother. I'm in love with you, Nick. Love in the sense that I want to be with you." "Me too." "I don't think you understand." "I do, Brian, believe me. I've been in love with you for so long now it hurts." "You mean you love me back?" "You're the only one I ever wanted to be with, Bri." "Oh God." Brian laughed through his tears. "I can't believe this is actually happening." "Brian, don't talk. Just hold me." Nick whispered. Brian wrapped his arms around his first and only love. "We're gonna be together forever, I promise." Brian whispered in his ear. For now, neither of them doubted it. Aw, I know, I'm a bitch leaving it like that. So sue me, I like to keep my readers on their toes. Oh, can I just say something to the guy sending me an e-mail asking why I couldn't spell basic words such as mom. I'M ENGLISH, WISE GUY!!! I'm sorry, that was a bit snappy, but jeez, I thought it was obvious. So to everyone else who has sometimes wondered about that, now you know. Phew, am I glad I got that off my chest!