Love Thru Chat
By Billy Burrew

Disclaimer: This is a work of erotic fiction. It does not reflect on the sexual orientations or proclivities of the band members of NSYNC. If it is illegal to view erotic fan fiction in your area or you are under aged or whatever the reason may be, please move on, otherwise....Please read it and enjoy!

Previously on Love Thru Chat

"HEY!", Lance said with mock surprise, "Who's side are you taking here?"

"That's what I am attempting to find out. I wanna go to sleep in somebody's bed....and I need to know just exactly that."

Lance, JC, and Justin blushed and began to look at each other and giggle. A minute later, they shook with laughter as the humor of the situation finally overcame the uneasiness and tension between JC, Justin and Lance.

Bill smiled and then yawned and shook his head, "When you figure it out, have the person who has to share the bed just enter quietly. I'll be sleeping in the room I was in last night." Bill yawned a second time before leaving the three guys alone to talk out their issues. Bill walked into the bedroom he and JC had shared the previous night and fell down on the bed, immediately asleep.

Chapter 17: What Could Have Been And Never Was...

The next morning, Bill woke up slowly, stretching each muscle in his legs then in his arms. As he stretched out his arms away from his chest, both connected with a warm body. Bill's eyes immediately popped open to view a completely asleep Josh on one side and an unconscious Justin on the other side. Bill pulled the covers down and as quietly as possible, extricated himself from the bed covers and sheets, then went and used the bathroom, leaving the two sleeping boys undisturbed as he went down to the kitchen to make something for them all to eat for breakfast.

Bill smiled as he saw a package of sausage in the refrigerator. He opened up the kitchen cabinets and nodded as he found a large box of bisquick as well, Bill pulled the box on the counter and begian to mix up a batch of biscuits and sausage gravy.

About 50 minutes later, Bill had finished making the white gravy with the black pepper and the sausage bits just as his 2nd batch of biscuits emerged from the oven. Bill walked out into the dining room and set the table, bringing the gravy out in a chafing dish to keep it warm and the biscuits in a covered casserole.

Bill sat down and smiled to himself as he waited for the smell of food to wake his friends up. His wait was a short one as he heard a thump from the floor above and the sound of feet shuffling into the hallway. "Oh my God! Bill cooked breakfast again!", Joey's voice called out from the upstairs hallway and three seconds later the three bedroom doors flew open as the guys pushed and shoved each other in their hurry to get downstairs.

Bill looked up from his coffee and the newspaper and smiled as he saw the guys rush into the room and sit down at the table.

"Good morning y'all", Bill said as he sipped his coffee.

"What is this smells SO good!", Joey said as he lifted the top off the container of gravy and stirred it.

Lance and Justin looked at Joey and tutted, "Yankee! That's sausage gravy! You serve it over biscuits!"

Joey blushed and cast his eyes down as his two friends began to kid him playfully. Bill got up from where he sat and speared a few biscuits, arranging them on his plate, then took the serving spoon and dished up some gravy over each one.

Bill placed the dish in front of Joey and smiled, "Here ya go Joe. You eat it like that!"

Joey smiled and began to dig in on his food as the rest of the guys prepped their plates and began to spoon up the gravy one after another.

Bill smiled and walked into the kitchen, grabbing the pitchers of milk and orange juice from the refrigerator and bringing them out to the table. He set them down and then walked back over to his seat and began to quietly sip his coffee and page through the classifieds.

A few minutes later, without looking up, Bill asked, " is everything?"

A chorus of five groans met his ears and he smiled and finished reading the section he had been perusing. Bill looked up at the four men and grinned as he realized that they had completely devoured all the food he had cooked.

The five singers sat quietly in their seats, their stomachs totally full and their eyes slightly glazed, staring off into space as their bodies began the large task of digesting the huge breakfast.

Bill got up and took his empty coffee cup into the kitchen and put it into the dishwasher, then he walked up the stairs to the bedroom and took a shower.

After he finished showering, Bill stood in front of the steamed up mirror of the bathroom, shaving off the days growth of facial hair. Bill finished and rinsed his razor out, then proceeded to wash his face and get dressed in his underwear and undershirt. Bill walked out of the bathroom and finished getting dressed, then headed downstairs.

The guys were still sitting at the breakfast table where he had left them, though they had begun to talk more as they digested.

Bill walked in and smiled as Lance looked up and smiled, "Thanks for cooking for us again.", the guys said as one as Bill smiled at them.

"No problem. The food was there and the recipe was simple." Bill grinned and walked off into the living room, taking a seat at the piano, and going through some warm-up exercises for his fingers.

Josh walked over and smiled, "You never told me you could play piano."

"I am full of surprises...aren't I? But actually....when push comes to shove, I suck.", Bill replied with a grin.

Lance and Justin walked over beside JC as Joey and Chris sat down on the sofa nearby and the five of them listened to Bill run through some basic warm up exercises. A few minutes later, when Lance asked if he knew any real songs to play Bill smiled at Lance and then cleared his throat a few times, "I'll humor you Lance. I just hope you all don't laugh from my terrible singing."

Josh and Justin and Lance stood quietly as Bill cracked his knuckles one last time before beginning to play the intro a song that sounded familiar, but that none of them could place.

In the shade of this oak tree
In the summer of my dreams
By the tall grass, by the wild rose
Where the trees dance as the wind blows
As the day goes oh so slowly
As the sun shines oh so holy
On the good and gracious green
In the summer of my dreams

Justin watched as JC and Lance both leaned forward on their elbows, both enraptured by the beautiful harmony and lyrics of the song. Justin smiled despite himself as he noticed the same dreamy look of love in both of their eyes as they leaned on the piano.

By the banks of this old stream
In the summer of my dreams
By the deep pool where the fish wait
For the old fool, with the wrong bait

There's a field of purple clover
There's a small cloud passing over
And then the rain comes washing clean
On the summer of my dreams

See the rain drops on the grass now
Just like diamonds lying there
By the old road where I pass now
There's a twilight in the air

And as the sun sets down before me
I see my true love waiting for me
Standing by the back porch screen
In the summer of my dreams

Justin looked away from Bill as he heard both Lance and JC sigh as he sang about his true love. Justin surpressed a giggle as he noticed how the two young men looked at Bill with the same rapt expression that each of them had seen in the eyes of their fans.

Justin smirked slightly and wondered if Bill realized that he held the undivided attention and affections of not one, but two of his new friends. Justin smiled widely as Bill caught the expression his face and winked at him just before starting the last refrain of his song.

In the shade of this old tree
In the summer of my dreams
By tall grass, by the wild rose
Where the trees dance As the beans grow

As the days go oh so slowly
As the sun shines oh so holy
On the good and gracious green
On the summer of my dreams

JC and Lance leaned as far forward onto the piano as they could, then sighed once more as Bill finished the last notes on the piano. As the sound faded, both young men sighed loudly and spoke in unison,

"Wow!" JC's neck turned his head to one side as he heard Lance's voice echo his sentiment as Lance's head quickly turned as well, and both boys caught their expressions mirrored in the other's face. Immediately the two boys began to blush as they realized that Bill's song had inspired them to think the same thoughts and exhibit the same feelings and emotions.

Justin stood and tried to hold back his laughter as Bill looked up and sighed, "How was that...I am sure Kathy Mattea's ears are just burning off what with the way I massacred her song like that."

Justin shook his head and smiled, "That was really beautiful. I could almost smell the fresh cut grass and feel the raindrops on my shoulders."

JC and Lance looked over at Justin and nodded together. "I think that someone is in the wrong business. You could make a fortune yourself in the music business.", JC said softly.

Bill guffawed loudly and shook his head.

"No...I think JC's right. With vocal lessons...I'd sign you up in a heartbeat with Freelance...", Lance said quickly.

"No", Bill said flatly, "No....I suck. End of statement. You need musically talented people. I don't fall under that umbrella."

Lance and JC both stood up to protest, but Bill put his hand up and blocked them.

" I am happy doing what I am doing." Bill smiled and began to play with another song, kicking around the melody as he tried to remember all the words.

"Whatcha playin'?", Justin asked as he sat down beside him.

"Justin...I believe I have just the song for you and JC, I think. Give me one minute and I'll have it all remembered and I'll play it for y'all."

Justin nodded and then looked up to see JC and Lance dragging chairs over beside the piano, smiling as he saw JC drag an extra one over for him.

Bill coughed and cleared his throat again, then looked at Justin, "Here it is."

There was someone I used to love
A long long time ago
He found someone before I had
A chance to let him know
And everytime I try to get
My heart to close that door
I'd think about what could have been
And only love him more

I told a friend how sad I was
That fate was so unfair
This perfect love that could have been
My heart would never share
And not til summer came and went
Did her advice ring true
Then I found out my heart was meant
To fall in love with you

We never know what could have been
But looking back we see
What could have been And never was
Was never meant to be

I saw the one I used to love
When I went out today
I said hello, I met his wife
And I was on my way
It may be luck, It may be fate
It may be God's design
I only know It's no mistake
I'm yours and you are mine

We never know what could have been
But looking back we see
What could have been and never was
Was never meant to be

As Bill finished the song, he looked up to see Justin's face covered in tears. Justin quickly got up and ran up the stairs to the bedroom. As Bill watched Justin disappear up the stairs, he sighed, hoping that Justin would understand the message of the song and get off his butt and talk with Josh.

A sniffling Josh quickly got up and ran up the stairs as well. Lance watched as JC ran up the stairs, hopefully to find Justin and have the talk that the two of them needed the most. As JC reached the top of the stairs, Lance looked over at Bill and inhaled sharply as he saw a single tear escape Bill's eyes and run down his cheeks. Sighing deeply, Bill got up from the piano and walked silently into the kitchen.

Joey and Chris stared wide eyed at Lance, wondering what the hell had just occurred in front of them. Lance raised his hand to explain, then lowered it and shook his head and replied, "Forget it. Its too long a story. Just suffice to say that everyone is miserable now, OK?" Joey and Chris sighed and then shook their heads and walked upstairs to check on their other friends as Lance walked into the kitchen to see about Bill.

Justin stared over at Josh and listened as Bill sang his song, unable to move despite himself. As Bill sang the final words of the song, Justin's heart broke and finally his body took flight up the stairs, running into his bedroom and falling onto the bed as he began weeping.

Josh watched as the tears started to flow from Justin's eyes. As Josh listened to Bill sing, he immediately realized why Bill had dedicated this particular song to them. Josh knew that Bill was completely aware of the tenuous situation between himself and Justin, of their feelings towards one another and sang the song in order to force Justin's and him into dealing with it by relating the sadness of what happens to people who never take the risk for romance. "What could have been and never was...was never meant to be."

Josh ran up the stairs after Justin, grimacing as he tried unsuccessfully to open the locked door, then running into the bathroom and getting into Justin's room via the door of the shared bathroom. Justin jumped as JC entered from the bathroom and he realized he had left one exit unlocked.

"JC..", Justin said uncertainly.

"Jus...", JC said quietly as he sat down on the bed beside him.

"I don't wanna think of what could have been between us when I am older. I don't wanna regret passing up an opportunity to love you.", Justin said sadly.

"Me either.", Josh said with a nod, "I couldn't live not knowing you, or taking a chance to experience what could be something beautiful between us."

Justin looked up, still crying, "But what about Bill?"

Josh shook his head, "Why do you think he sang that song? He knew...He made the decision to let me go and pursue you by singing that song. He gave me the out. I had no choice but to take it."

Justin grabbed JC into a hug as he realized the tough choice both Bill and Josh had just made, ending what was between them for the sake of Justin's happiness. JC pulled his arms around Justin and held him tight, rocking him back and forth until they both drifted off into a light emotionless slumber.

Lance walked into the kitchen and sighed as he saw Bill's hands shake as he poured a glass of water for himself.

"Well that sucked!", Lance said. Bill looked over to Lance and nodded, his face set in a deep, deep frown. "I am so sorry. That must have been so hard to do.", Lance said as his eyes welled up with tears.

"As you had most aptly and eloquently put it sucked...But it had to be done. Those two are meant to be", Bill replied flatly, then sat down on the tile floor and pulled his knees to his chest and sat quietly, breathing deeply and staring off into the distance.

Lance sat down beside Bill and began to think of a way to console his friend, settling for a awkward hug. Lance threw his arms around Bill's neck and pulled him into a comforting embrace just a second before Bill began to cry in earnest.

A moment later, Bill stiffened in Lance's arms and he stood up and wiped his face off and sniffled a little in a weak attempt to clear his nose. "Well...I am definitely not gonna get a job or an apartment looking like this. I look like the inside of a cat's ass here. I am gonna go wash my face."

Lance watched Bill walk out of the kitchen and then up the stairs to the bathroom by the master bedroom to wash up with some cold water, hoping to pull a little of the puffiness that his quick spat of crying had caused.

Well...that was kinda a sad note to end the chapter on. What will happen next. Only the Shadow knows...(well....actually...he doesn't even know since I have yet to write it all out.) <lol>
I'd like to thank country recording diva Kathy Mattea for providing the lyrics to the songs used in this chapter. Both songs are from her WONDERFUL album, "Time Passes By"

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-Billy Burrew