Date: Sun, 29 Aug 1999 17:48:27 PDT From: Jason Clarke Subject: Loving Nick - Part 5 This story involves members of the bands Backstreet Boys and N'SYNC. I am in no way implying anything about the sexuality of any of their members. This is purely a fictional story. Enjoy! This is my first attempt at writing a story like this so please bear with me. Please send any comments and/or suggestions to jaclarke@hotmail.com * * * * * * * * * * * * Loving Nick - Part 5 Brian finally joined the rest of the guys in the lobby. The Backstreet Boys were riding in one limo while N'SYNC was in another. The ride to the rehearsal venue was tense and awkward as everyone rode in silence. Several times, Kevin and AJ glanced towards Nick, but each time they wanted to say something, they would change their mind at the last second, not knowing how to break the tension. Brian also looked at Nick every few minutes, but he did not even attempt to start a conversation after the encounter at the hotel. As for Nick, he spent the entire ride staring out the window. Thoughts were racing through his head. For one thing, he dreaded the coming rehearsals and concerts, not knowing how he can continue working with the group after the recent developments. Every so often, his thoughts would drift to Lance. Did he really have feelings for Lance or was he just using Lance to get over the hurt and anger that he was feeling? Nick was confused, and no matter how much he thought about these things, there appeared to be no answer to his questions. The rehearsal was tiring for everyone. This was the final rehearsal before the Montreal concert in which the Backstreet Boys would perform together with N'SYNC. Montreal was the first stop on the Canadian tour, and the thought made Nick feel depressed as he realized the many tour stops in the days ahead. Not a word was said between Nick and the rest of the guys during rehearsal. Despite nailing all of the dance moves, Nick's heart was not in the dancing. When the group was practicing "Everybody Backstreet's Back," images of happier times flashed before Nick. By the middle of the song, the emotions were flooding Nick's mind and he could not carry on with the song. Nick ran off the stage and headed to the washroom. Lance saw this and ran off after Nick. When Lance opened the door to the washroom, he saw Nick crying by the sink, totally unaware that he was not alone in the room. Lance quietly walked up to Nick and put his hands on Nick's shoulders. "I'm so sorry, Nick. This must be so difficult for you," he said softly. Nick looked into the mirror and realized that it was Lance. He wiped his tears from his eyes and attempted a smile. "Thanks for everything, Lance. I'll be alright." Lance blushed a bit but managed to say, "No problem, Nick." Both of them slowly walked back to the stage area. "Is everything alright, Nick?" Fatima asked with genuine concern. "You need to take a break?" "No, it's okay. I'm fine. Thanks for the offer, though," Nick replied. Kevin began to walk over to Nick to see if he was okay, but Nick just walked back to his position and told Fatima that he was ready to continue the rehearsal. Kevin looked at AJ and Brian and sighed, knowing that it would be very difficult to repair the damage that has been inflicted on Nick. * * * * * * * * * * * * * The concert concluded without a hitch. The dancing was great and the singing was amazing as usual. Both groups sang and danced their hearts out and the fans were truly appreciative. At the end of the concert, Nick stunned everyone by thanking all of the fans for their support in very fluent French. Kevin, AJ, Howie, and Brian just stared in shock while Lance listened to Nick in awe. As he watched Nick on stage, he found his adoration and admiration of Nick growing ever stronger. At the same time, however, he also noticed Brian's listening attentively to Nick. Thoughts began to creep into his mind that perhaps he would eventually lose Nick to Brian. Once they were back at the hotel, everyone was totally tired from the performance. Chris, Joey, AJ, and Howie still wanted to go clubbing but everyone else decided to get some sleep. As Nick reached his room, he took out his key to open the door. Lance said goodnight to Nick and was about to head to his room when Nick asked him if he wanted to chat for a while. A smile formed on Lance's face and he walked with Nick into his room. The two guys sat on Nick's bed and talked about everything and anything that came to mind. Both of them were surprised at how much they have in common. After a while though, Nick's fatigue started to kick in and he fell asleep on the bed. Lance looked at Nick sleeping peacefully and smiled. "He looks so cute when he is sleeping," Lance thought to himself. He gently moved Nick into a better sleeping position, careful not to wake him up. After cleaning up the room a little, he was about to head back to his room when Nick suddenly yelled out, "NO!!! Don't leave me!!" Nick's arms were flinging wildly and he was sweating. Lance ran over to Nick and held him in his arms. "It's okay, Nick, it's only a nightmare," Lance whispered in Nick's ears. After a couple of minutes, Nick's eyes opened as he realized that it was only a dream. Nick held Lance tightly, hoping to find security in him. "Lance, can you please stay with me tonight?" Lance brushed Nick's blond hair softly. "Of course, Nick, anything for you." Very soon, Nick fell asleep again and Lance began to feel very tired too. Although he wanted to snuggle up to Nick and hold him tight through the night, he didn't want to appear to take advantage of Nick at this point in time. He walked over to the sofa and soon, he too fell asleep. * * * * * * * * * * * * * Lance woke up at about 7:30 the next morning. At first, he looked around the room and did not realize that he had stayed in Nick's room all night. After a while, his mind cleared as he remembered the events from last night. He realized that he was sleeping on Nick's bed and not on the sofa from the night before. He glanced over and did not see Nick anywhere. In a second, he jumped off the bed and started looking for Nick. He looked through the entire room and could not find Nick anywhere. By this time, Lance was in a panic. He got dressed quickly and was about to head out to find Nick when he saw a note on the night table. "Dearest Lance, By the time you read this note, I will probably be somewhere far away from you. I am so sorry that I left without saying goodbye but I really cannot stay here much longer. I tried so hard to pretend nothing has happened but the fact is that I cannot. Every time I see the guys, all I can remember are the things they said and the things that they did. Perhaps I am making too big of a deal out of this but I can no longer face them. Please, Lance, forgive me. You have been a true friend and I will be forever grateful. I know that I am being totally unfair to you for leaving you without telling you, and you have every right to be angry with me. My feelings for you have not changed, you will always be very special to me. Don't worry about me, Lance, I will be fine. I just need some time alone to sort out this mess. I really hope that you can find it in you to forgive me. I'm so sorry. Your friend always, Nick" Lance's tears fell onto the note that Nick wrote. "Why Nick? Why did you have to be so hard on yourself? Why didn't you let me help you through this?" he thought to himself. Lance ran out of the room and headed for Kevin's room. He pounded the door in desperation. Kevin ran to the door and saw a distraught Lance standing in front of him. "What's wrong Lance?" Kevin asked, not knowing what is causing Lance's distress. "What happened?" "It's Nick..." Lance managed to say between his sobs. "Nick? What's wrong with Nick?" Kevin asked. His facial expression showed that he was very worried now. "Nick..." Lance stammered, "Nick left!!" "Nick what???" Kevin yelled. "What do you mean he left?" By now, the others on the floor were coming out of their rooms to see what was going on. They all headed towards Kevin's room. Lance handed the note that Nick left to Kevin. After reading it, Kevin's face turned white as a ghost. "What's the matter, Kev?" AJ inquired. "Nick left," was all Kevin managed to say. Everyone gathered in Kevin's room to deal with the situation. No one knew where Nick went and they had no idea of what to do. Meanwhile, the television in Kevin's room was still on. Suddenly, Justin yelled, "Everyone, look!!" as he pointed to the television. "A bombshell from the world of music this morning," the news anchor announced, "the Backstreet Boys, currently on their Canadian tour with N'SYNC, will have difficulty completing their tour after Nick Carter of the group announced his temporary departure from the group this morning. In a statement issued by Mr. Carter this morning, the singer said that he was temporarily leaving the tour and the group to deal with some personal problems. He firmly insisted that this was NOT the result of conflicts within the group and that he wishes the rest of the group success in the remainder of their tour. Mr. Carter deeply regrets his sudden departure and apologizes to all the fans for this." Everyone in the room was silent. Brian began to weep softly. Kevin walked over to him and hugged his cousin. "He even thought of an explanation for us," AJ finally said. "Even after all the things that we did to him." "Nick's grown up a lot," JC finally said. Howie shook his head and sighed. "How could we have been so blind? We, not Nick, are the immature ones." The rest of the day seemed to drag on very slowly. The rehearsal was a disaster as everyone's mind was on Nick and no one paid attention to their dance moves. After the dreadful rehearsal, everyone packed up their things and headed back to the hotel. As Lance was getting his things ready, his cell phone rang. "Hello?" Lance answered. "Hi," a soft voice spoke. "It's Nick." ...to be continued.... Where is Nick? Will Nick and Lance's relationship continue to develop? Will Nick ever rejoin the group? Please send any comments and/or suggestions to jaclarke@hotmail.com