Date: Sat, 13 May 2000 04:14:38 EDT From: SaetanSaDiablo@aol.com Subject: One More Try -- 4&5 Hey guys! It's me, as usual. I said I wasn't going to post an installment until after I figured out how to get Damien and Kevin together, well, I still don't have all the details, but I got a main idea. I'll work it all out in the future. I'd like to do some thank ya's fore I let y'all read. KB! Thanks for helping me. Lauren, Lydia, Khiem, Mica, and Terrie! Thanks for you guys as well. I enjoy talking with you guys and brainstorming. And I'd most importantly would like to thank Rich, Thanks for standing by me this summer. I needed you most then. Disclaimer: Everything herein is a figment of the author's imagination. Any material herein is not meant to imply the sexualities of any person real or living. (Including the 5 dancing queens) And here is: One More Try! ;) One More Try By Corrado Bottieri Chapter 4: The next morning was pretty uneventful. The only one that was up when I got up was AJ and he was sitting down eating some cereal. "What are you doing up?" I asked, smiling. "Nothing really, I just couldn't sleep." He replied softly. "Anything bothering you?" I asked, raising an eyebrow. "Nothing really, just a little confused about a few things." I pulled up a chair and sat next to him. "Anything you care to tell me about?" I asked softly, "It's okay man, you can trust me as you would a brother. I've never stirred anyone wrong. I mean, it's not like I run around telling everyone that Kelly lost her virginity in a bus on a tenth grade field trip." I glanced at his face and noticed the desired effect: A smile. "I'm just, confused about some things." He shrugged. "About why you've been so nice to us, mainly. I mean, Kevin and Brian show up at your door without you knowing. And then the rest of us just pop in and your world...and turn it upside down...and," He sighed, "And now you're trying to help me with one of my problems. I don't get you man." He smiled. "No one does. I'm just one of those people." I stood up and poured myself a cup of coffee. "So what's wrong?" He shook his head. "I'm so confused about...everything." "Namely?" I asked placing my cup of coffee down and sitting next to him again. "My sexuality." I froze and glanced at him. "What do you mean?" I asked, trying to make my voice as calm and reassuring as I could. "I'm...I mean," He pushed the cereal bowl away from him and rested his head in his hands. I thought I could see tears fall on the table and put an arm over his shoulder. He tensed up and then relaxed when he sensed no malicious intent. "I've had so many women. Oh so many women. But it's all fake, you know?" He looked up at me, and indeed, he had been crying. "I have...a hard time getting it up for a woman now." He sighed, "I don't even know why I'm telling you this. I mean, you're practically a stranger, but I trust you. And, I know you won't tell anyone unless I say its allright. And, I just...find men turning me on and more and more than women, you know what I mean?" Indeed, I did know what he meant. I had gone through the same thing in highschool. "Yes." I said softly, "Yes, AJ. I know what you mean. I went through the same thing in highschool. I didn't know what to do, you know? I started dating a cheerleader and I'd go to the football games but I'd end up watching the players instead of my girlfriend. I'd find myself lusting after the sweaty male then the female. You know what I mean?" He sniffled and nodded his understanding. "So don't worry about it. It took me months to figure out that I was gay, I mean, it took me months to actually sit there and figure out that men turned me on, not the bouncing boobs." He laughed at this. "So whatever you decide..." He sighed. "I don't know. That's the thing. I don't know whether or not I'm gay or bi or straight and just going through a phase. I'm...confused!" He sighed. I hugged him a second and glanced at the clock. I had to leave in five minutes. "Hey, I've got to go to class. We'll continue this at another time, unless you want me to call in sick?" He shook his head. "No, go to work. I'll figure it out and if I need your shoulder again, don't worry. Oh, and Damien?" I turned around and glanced at him. "Where's your family?" "My mother left me when I was a child. And I was stuck with my older brother and my father. My older brother left just before my father started to beat me." I shrugged, "I watched my mom leave. She kissed me and she was gone. Just like that." He nodded and smiled apologetically. "I'm sorry." He said simply. I smiled. "No problem. That was long ago." I said and walked out. ---- "Peter," I said pointing to one of my classmates. "Please come up to the board and conjugate the verb 'Faire' and tell us what it means. S'IL vous plait?" I watched as the fair-haired youth strolled up to the board and started to write. Jamie and Fred sat in the back as usual. And Brian wouldn't stop complaining about where I made them sit. "Mr. Falasino. Will you please keep quiet?" I asked sternly. Getting slightly irritated. He just looked up at me and spat. I watched the glob of spit fly from his mouth and fall on the desk. I narrowed my eyes. "Mr. Falasino, get down to the Office, now." He has been testing my patience all year. And we were two weeks behind schedule. Brian sighed and exited the classroom. "I swear, that kid." I shook my head. "Would anyone like to conjugate the verb? Please?" I raised an eyebrow and I know they've never seen me so pissed. I glanced at Darcy. "Conjugate it." was all I said, and put the chalk on her desk. I walked over to my side of the desk and sat down to write a note about Brian. "Done." Darcy announced. I glanced at her and back at the board. I nodded my acceptance and changed a few of the spellings. "You had the basic idea, but it's not spelled how it's sounded. There." I said as I changed a few of the spellings. "That's Faire. Which means what, class?" I asked raising an eyebrow. Only John answered that, "To do!" he said with a smug smile. "You're getting too obstinate in your ways, John." I said grinning. He wrinkled his nose at the word. "I am not. Besides, like Kelly says, I'm more mature than you are." I wondered how he knew what she had said. The day flew by rather quickly after that, with no interruptions in the regular schedule that I call my life. When I had gotten home around three o'clock, I noticed there were three cars in my driveway. None of which I recognized. When I opened my door, I saw three people sitting around the coffee table. I only recognized Kevin and Nick. The other one didn't look all that familiar. "Hey." I said softly. Hopefully loud enough so they could hear. "Hey yourself." Kevin said with a small smile. Nick stood up and walked me upstairs to my room. "Let's leave them alone." Nick suggested when we reached my door. "What's going on?" I asked, obviously worried. "I'm not sure. What do you frenchies say? Je ne sais pas? Right?" I nodded. "Je ne sais pas." I smiled at him, "That's how you say, 'I don't know.'" He nodded his agreement. Before I knew it, he leaned over and kissed me. I was a bit surprised at first and pushed him off me. "Wha...?" I said and he smiled. "I'm not wrong about you. I hope I'm not wrong about you. You're gay right?" He asked, before diving back into my lips. I blinked and pushed him off me again. "Nick, we can't do this..." I said, knowing full well what he wanted. He pushed me down on the bed and pressed his hard crotch into mine. I let out a low groan. Which was stifled by his lips being pressed against mine, and his hot, warm, tongue thrusting into my mouth. "Nick, we can't, I don't have a..." He tore a condom out of his pocket, "But Nick, I'm a..." He pressed his lips against mine and started to unbuckle my belt. He got my pants almost all the way off before he gasped when he saw my slight bulge. I blushed and started to protest again, about this. He wouldn't hear it, and threw himself on me again, kissing me and groping me everywhere. Soon, he started to unbuckle his own pants, and he wasn't wearing any underwear. Struggling with as much strength as I can, I pushed him off me. "No!" I said. He lay on the floor on his back staring up at me. I pulled up my pants and glared at him. Suddenly the phone rang and I reached over to pick it up. "Hello?" "Hello." A voice replied. I knew I should've recognized it. "What'cha need?" I asked softly. Trying to pinpoint that voice. "To talk to my son." I froze. "Mama?" I asked, unbelieving. "Yes, son," She said as if she cared, "Mama's back." I couldn't believe it. Suddenly, I heard voices in my darkness. The darkness that had cascaded around me as soon as I heard the voice. I heard the voices singing, and slowly, oh ever so slowly, did the voices disappear until only one was left. Singing to me. "Mother?" I asked again, as if I couldn't believe it. And trust me, I couldn't. "Yes, true son." She said softly, "yes." I dropped the phone and Nick must've regained his wits from being rejected, he picked up the phone and placed it in my hand. He snapped his fingers in front of my face a few times before I finally saw the light. "Mother." I said softly. I brought the phone to my ear. "Mother." I repeated. "Yes, true son." I heard her sigh. "Are you okay? How is everything?" I blinked. "Wait. You leave when I'm eight and you don't call for at least eighteen year?" I blinked. "What right do you have?" I asked rather calmly. Considering how upset I was. "You don't understand," she said softly, too softly. "It wasn't my fault, it was your father..." I interrupted her. "My father!" I was outraged now. "What does my father have to do with anything?" "Your father, Damien, was the one who wanted me to leave. Because I was too understanding." I blinked and sighed. "Why did you call me, mother?" I asked, the venom dripping from my voice. "I wanted to find out how you've made it, and to have dinner with you. I want to explain a few things about your father...and since he's dead, I don't have to worry about his corrupting you." "You needn't worry about that anyway. I didn't even know he fuckin' died." I sighed. "Let alone..." I glanced at Nick who suddenly blushed and walked out of my room. I didn't feel like putting up with him at the moment. I glanced at the doorway where he walked out and shut the door. I sat down listening to my mother's explanation about why she left. "Your father couldn't take the truth, so he blamed me. You always were my favorite...you always were my true son, not Christopher. You. You were my true son and I called you that for years. Your father always called you Little Man, how I hated that name." She sighed softly and continued. "Your father found something out, and totally blamed me for it. It wasn't fair, but I left you with him. You and Christopher. And, Christopher wasn't my true son. Oh, I loved him like he was, but he was adopted. Your father knew that too. The doctor said I couldn't have babies, your father blamed that on me as well. So we adopted Christopher...and you, and you came along. I got pregnant with you. You were a quick labor, and I remember every second." I sighed as I let her remember my birth and everything that came along with it. "And HE wanted me to leave so he could make you straight." She snorted. "As if anyone could make you straight." Make me straight? How did they know I was gay in the first place? "Mama, can we talk about this over dinner?" I asked, hoping she'd say yes. "Yes." She said softly, confidently. "Of course we can." I sighed and took down her number and address. "Just remember, son, that if I had known he would beat you, I would have taken you with me. I swear it." She said, almost in tears. "We'll talk about this later, allright?" She asked and I sighed. "Allright." I agreed. ---- Chapter 5: The next day I didn't go to any of my classes for I was called down to the office. A rare occurrence for me. "Mr. Jones." The secretary smiled and nodded her head. "That way." She pointed down a short corridor about six feet long. And at the end was a door. "Thank you, Stella." I said, flashing a quick smile. She blushed and busied herself with work. I walked down the hallway and knocked on the door. A muffled 'come in' was heard and I cracked the door. "Come in, come in." Mr. Deskins, the school principal called. I walked into the office and stood in front of his desk. "Have a seat." He mumbled and I very much obliged. "First let me start, do you know why you are in here?" "I must confess, Mr. Deskins, that I have no idea whatsoever." I answered in total truth. "Well it seems we have had a complaint." I braced myself, "From a certain mother of a child of yours. A Brian...Falasino, I believe." I groaned inwardly. "I'm sorry, Mr. Deskins. But that kid an unruly, undisciplined whelk!" I shouted and immediately regretted it. "I apologize for my anger, but he has been testing me since the beginning on the year. And I've tried, countless times to teach him, but he just refuses to learn." I sighed. Mr. Deskins was about to say something but I stopped him, "You can't teach a kid if he doesn't want to be taught. Mr. Deskins, with all due respect, I would like to have him taken out of my French class." I stood up and Mr. Deskins shook his head. "If he is taken out of your French class, you must have probably reason." "Isn't disrupting the education of students enough?" I asked rhetorically. "He constantly makes snotty remarks, he doesn't know when to shut up. I've given him countless chances. His grades are poor because he doesn't do the work." I was getting slightly irritated. "Perhaps you can show a bit of...leniency. He comes from a well-to-do back--" "I don't give a shit whether he's the son of the president. That kid is not going to learn in my classroom, or any other! He does NOT deserve to be taught in my classroom. I have some VERY intelligent kids in my class, and some average students. But to show him a leniency and give him a high grade on a test because he comes from a 'well-to-do' background? I'm sorry, but he's getting the same treatment as John DaVisani! And we all know John's background. He never did so well in any class until mine." "Maybe that's because of an outside influence on you..." I glared at him. "If I must, Mr. Deskins, I will get his file and SHOW you his work. He's a smart kid with a B average." I narrowed my eyes. "I'm having a VERY hard time and I come to work for this shit? I'm sorry Mr. Deskins, I'm gone." And I walked out of the office. "Damien! Mr. Jones! We need you." I snorted and walked out of the Main Office and into my classroom to pick up my stuff. "I'm sorry, class. You won't have class today unless the principal can find a substitute." A bunch of kids asked why and I shook my head. "Just a lot of stuff that's going on. Finally, something happened that caused me to quit." I glanced at the smirking Brian. "I doubt I'll be coming back." John looked hurt and upset and I promised him I'd talk to him about everything later. Everyone else seemed sympathetic and tried to make light. After I got everything packed and I explained that I doubt they'd ever see me again, I left. I made it home in about twenty minutes when AJ and Kelly were on the couch watching TV. I mumbled a greeting to them both and ran for the kitchen. "That son of a bitch!" I heard Kelly yell as she ran for the kitchen. "I'm going to kill him. Did he fire you?" I shook my head. "I quit." I said simply. "I quit, plain and simple." I yawned softly and sighed. "Mr. Deskins tried to say that I had an outside force corrupting me. He insinuated that someone was paying me to fail Brian Falasino and pass John." I sighed and shook my head. "That bastard. That's okay, though. I don't care." I stretched. "More time to work on my book." I nodded. Kelly laughed and shook her head. "You're something else." She said smiling. "Am I? Really?" I chuckled and glanced at AJ, he looked sullen. I pushed Kelly out of the house and told her to pick up some pizza and something for lunch. She agreed and I sit next to AJ. "Any luck, my man?" I asked, raising an eyebrow. He sighed. "No, I'm just...incredibly confused." He mumbled something and I didn't hear him. "What was that?" I asked, trying to clarify things. "I said, and Nick isn't helping any either." When that finally registered I groaned. "That slut." I spit out. He looked at me, surprised. "You don't like him?" He asked, raising an eyebrow. "Let's just say, he and I don't get along all that well." I said nodding. Trying to keep the story between Nick and I as discreet as possible. I glanced at AJ. "Did you and Nick...fool around?" He shook his head. "No, he tried but I told him no." He shrugged. "It was only a matter of time, anyway." Only a matter of time? I wanted to know about that, but I didn't ask. I just sat there and comforted my friend. Well, I put my arms around him and let him use me as a shoulder to cry on. For once, I got to be the rock. It felt good to help someone, rather than be helped. Soon, AJ wiped his eyes and shifted his weight in my arms. I hugged him close a second, relishing in the warmth of his body next to mine, and nudged him. "I should get cleaned up." He said as soon as he calmed down a bit. I smiled. "You should get cleaned up. C'mon." I dragged him to the bathroom and grabbed some tissues. After I wiped his face clean, I left him to get some clothes and let him take a shower. By the time he was done with his shower, I had clothes and a towel laid out for him on the bed. I was down in the kitchen talking to Kelly over a cup of coffee and explained to her what happened. She agreed to help me look for a job, maybe even help me get my dream set up: To become a Creative Writing professor for a college. AJ came down and smiled at the two of us sitting there. The evidence of his excursion was gone and he seemed just as uppity. We had a refreshing conversation about entertainment when Kevin and the rest of the geeks arrived. "Back so soon?" AJ said, fluttering his eyelashes. Howie rolled his eyes and grinned. "Only because we missed your sorry face." I glanced at Howie and noticed he was staring at AJ rather intently. Possibly even checking him out. I forced that thought out of my mind, AJ didn't need anything like that. He was having some problems. Nick glanced at me and I quickly turned away. Kevin noticed this and dragged me into the bedroom. "What's going on with you and Nick?" He asked. "Nothing." I said, innocently I might add. "Don't lie to me, every time someone said your name, he'd flinch. Now, we get here after our meeting with management, Nick glances at you, and you turn away. Now what the hell is going on?" He was mad. I glanced at him and looked away. I sighed. I honestly didn't want to tell him. I honestly didn't. But I did. After I finished telling him, he was fuming. He glanced at me, then at the doorway. Before I had a chance to react, he was out that door and down in the kitchen. I followed closely behind. "You did WHAT?" Kevin narrowed his eyes at Nick and growled. Something I've never seen him do before, and I don't think the others have either. "I can't believe...you, and you knew! You KNEW! Why did you do it?" Kevin was fuming. I picked up a paper clip and started to chew on it softly. "Because I was fuckin' jealous, allright? That's why! I was jealous!" Nick replied. Everyone else was just as clueless as I was. Well, I had a small idea forming in the back of my head. "I was fucking jealous!" Nick said softly, "You always get what I want. Always. I'm only sorry I didn't go any further!" He screamed and stormed out of the house. "Pansy." I muttered. Kevin blinked at me and Kelly chuckled softly. Everyone else just sighed and turned to look toward me. "What?" I asked innocently. They all shook their head and Kevin pulled me up the stairs and into my room. "We need to talk." Kevin said softly. I blinked at him and raised an eyebrow. "What's up?" I asked, sitting on the couch. I chewed on the paper clip a little more and Kevin glanced at me. "You should take that out of your mouth." He said, noticing my paper clip. I shook my head. "Nasty habit. So tell me already." I pleaded. He chuckled but then looked sullen. "Damien, I'm...gay." I looked at him and did the worst thing I could've done at the moment: I choked.