Date: Wed, 12 Apr 2000 01:52:00 -0700 (PDT) From: Wesley Cook Subject: Past Reflections 3 Author's Note: Hey you guys and gals, sorry for keeping you so long on this installment. I have had some bad times lately but everything is good now. Now in the songs I have in the story I have changed a word or two to help with the context. DO NOT TRY AND COPY THESE SONGS AND REDO THEM they belong to the BSB and they are copyrighted. I did this so I can do this installment. This will be the one and only time I will change the words of a song. Now that is taken care of I want you guys to know that NIFTY has soul right at posting this material and that if you want to post this story any where else you MUST get permission from me. It's just good manners. Now on to the thank you's. I want to thank Dennis he has been there when I was down and just helped me out a lot. Also I want to than Rod H. he has been there every time I needed him. I know you are a good ways from me but man thanks you helped me keep going. Also Aspire man where have you been I miss you. And all of you that have sent responses to me on the story. Legal Stuff: Okay you guys and gals know that this is just a fantasy which means it is not real. This story doesn't imply that any of the BSB are gay mainly Kevin. So if you are not old enough to read sexually explicit material then leave. Also if you have a prob. reading about homosexuality then leave. Also a reminder about the songs don't do something with them that could someone in trouble. Now I like to get e-mail so please let me know what you guys and gals think. You can reach me at wesleym2@yahoo.com. Now on with the story. Past Reflections 3 I awoke to an empty bed. Where was Kevin? I sat up and looked around and there was no note. I got up and walked around the room but couldn't hear anything. He may have gone to work out this morning. I gathered some clothes and headed for the shower. I took care of the morning duties and showered. I got dressed and ordered breakfast for two. I thought Kevin would be back in a bit. I waited and the food arrived but no Kevin. I sat down and waited for another hour still no Kevin. I decided to eat. I ate a little bit hoping Kevin would come in and we would share breakfast. I sat there for another hour and still Kevin never showed. I got up and called his cell phone. "Hello Kevin speaking?" It was Kevin. "Kevin where are you?" "Who is this?" "Kevin it's me Mark?" "Oh hi, how you doing?" "Okay, I'm waiting for you to get here to have breakfast with me." "Oh I won't be there." "Why Kevin?" "Because I'm on the bus headed to Chicago." This hit me really hard. "Wh.why are you there and why am I not on the bus with you?" "Look I don't have time to go through this right now I call you later. Bye." I was hurt and shocked by that. I looked up the airports number and called to get the earliest flight back to my home in Texarkana, AR. They had one that would leave in a few hours. So I grabbed it. I packed my things and left. Tears were running down my face. But after that I don't remember much other than Dennis picking me up at the airport and taking me home and putting me to bed. I slept restless sleep. The conversation between me and Kevin kept going through my mind. I was brought out of my sleep with the phone ringing. "Hello, is Mark there?" It was Kevin. "This is he how can I help you?" I said coldly. But also with tears forming in my eyes again. "I'm sorry, I." I spoke up. "Can it, you had something going for you but you let it get away from you. You just brushed me off and left with out even a note telling me what or where you were doing and going. And then I call and you just push me off to get off the phone. I don't work like that Mr. Richardson. So as of now I don't want you calling me ever again. You do and you will be sued for phone harassment. Good Bye Mr. Richardson." I slammed the phone down. And then I hit the floor crying uncontrollably. Eventually I fell asleep. **Chicago** "What have I done?" Kevin said as he hung up the phone. The rest of the guys were in the room with Kevin. "Kevin, it may be that it wasn't meant to be." Howie said. "Howie it was and I screwed up. I put my Job before him and brushed him off. I promised I would never do that. But then I turn around and do it." Howie and Brian were starting to see how much Mark meant to Kevin. Of course Steve had been fired."I gotta go." Kevin said suddenly. He grabbed a bag and put some clothes in it and called the airport to get the earliest flight out to Texarkana, AR. "Kevin you can't leave now we have a concert in two days" Howie said. But Brian broke in before Kevin could say a word. "No Kevin is going and so am I. I can't see Kevin like this." And with that Brian left and got some clothes put together and ready to leave after calling to get a plane seat reserved. **Texarkana** I was awaken by a knock at the door. I got up and answered it. "Flower delivery for Mark from Boo." A shrill voice said. "I'm Mark." I said "Okay sign here please." I did and the young man waved his hand and several guys began to bring flowers in. There must have been about 20 or 30 dozen red roses when they finally finished. They left and I closed the door. I knew who they were from and that's why I passed out. I was too exhausted to do anything. I awoke sometime later and found myself in bed with a pair of arms wrapped around me. I managed to roll over and saw Kevin with a smile on his face. He was awake watching me. We were both dressed still. I just turned back over and began to cry. "Babe, please I'm sorry." He said crying now. I heard some music playing . I listened and heard Kevin begin to sing. It's not that I can't live without you It's just that I don't even want to try Every night I dream about you Ever since the day we said goodbye If I wasn't such a fool Right now I'd be holding you There's nothin' that I wouldn't do Baby if I only knew The words to say The road to take To find a way back to your heart What can I do To get to you And find a way back to your heart I don't know how it got so crazy But I'll do anything to set things right 'Cause your love is so amazing Baby you're the best thing in my life Let me prove my love is real And made you feel the way I feel I promise I would give the world If only you would tell me boy The words to say The road to take To find a way back to your heart What can I do To get to you And find a way back to your heart Give me one more chance, To give my love to you (give you my love, give you my love) 'Cause no one on this earth loves you like I do, Tell me The words to say The road to take To find a way back to your heart What can I do To get to you And find a way back to your heart I turn back time To make you mine And find a way back to your heart I beg and plead Fall to my knees To find a way back to your heart The words to say The road to take To find a way back to your heart What can I do To get to you And find a way back to your heart I fought back tears. Kevin had hurt me deeply by doing what he did. I refused to be made a fool. So I let him know what he did. "Kevin, you hurt me. And then you come to me with flowers and everything is going to be like it was before? Well it don't work that way." I felt his arms leave me. "Mark I'll leave if that is what you want." "Yes." With that I heard him leave the room. I didn't expect him to do it but he did. When he left I knew then that he would do anything to make me happy. The truth was I didn't want him to leave so Ijumped up and ran into the living room just as him and Brian was going through the door. I went over there and spun Kevin around and gave him a kiss. He dropped his bag and wrapped his arms around me and pulled me tight against him. "I'm sorry Mark I really am." He said after we broke the kiss. "Kevin I'm not going to say it is okay because it isn't but I'm willing to work through it if you are and that means no running from it." "I am to." I kissed him again and pulled him back in the house. I finally noticed Brian with him. "I'm sorry Brian I didn't know your were here." "It's okay Mark, I wanted to come and apologize to you for treating you like I have." I watched his eyes and saw nothing there but pure sincerity. "Your forgiven Brian." "Mark you don't realize how I felt when I saw Kevin on that bus with out you. He just stared out the window and wouldn't speak to anyone. That was only for a few hours but I wander what he would be like that if you and him were separated for a longer period of time." "Lets not talk like that, when do you have to be in Chicago?" I knew they had a show in a couple of days. "Tomorrow." Brian said. I pulled Kevin back in the house and Brian followed and shut the door. I pulled away from Kevin so I could arrange for us three to be flying back to Chicago a.s.a.p. "Okay we leave tonight at 7:00 so that means we have to leave now. I haven't unpack my things so lets go." I went to my room grabbed my stuff and we climbed into the rental they had gotten from the airport. Not long after we got to the Airport we were loaded on to the plane and headed for Chicago. **Chicago Airport** I had Kevin call the guys and let them know to meet us at the air port. So as we got off the plane we saw Nick, A.J., and Howie waiting on us. We grabbed our gear from the return luggage place and put it in the limo and headed for the hotel. I sat next to Kevin in the limo and Brian next to him. Nick was across from me and then A.J. and then Howie. Every one was quiet so I broke the ice. "Howie, I know about your plan I hope you have decided against it because I don't think you want the consequences of that plan." Howie was surprised but stayed cool. "I won't do anything to you or Kevin that could cause problems." He said honestly. "Okay what about the tour manager is he still around?" Nick spoke up this time. "We had him removed because of the way he handled things and management was wandering if you would take up the job as tour manager and have an assistant to do most of the work." "Okay that will work but let me choose the person I want to work with. I have a few people in mind but have to talk to them first." He shook his head in agreement and that was the end of our conversation as we had arrived at the hotel. The guys were the first ones out and were heading inside before I got to the outer doors. I started in and was held back by two guards. "I'm sorry sir but you are allowed in here you have to wait over there with the other fans." "I'm not a fan I work for the Backstreet Boys and I am sponsoring this tour so if you don't let me in you will be looking for a new job in less than a few hours." He looked at me and began laughing at me. That wasn't a very smart move on his behalf. I pulled out my cell phone and dialed the hotel management and explained the situation. After I hung up the head manager came out and escorted me in along with the guard. "I'm very sorry Mr. Cook It seems that our security needs to learn some manners. I had checked with the records and it shows that you are staying here with the BSB. What I don't know is why the person here," he said pointing to the guard, "didn't check with the front desk first." "That's fine I just want to go upstairs and get some rest. So if you will excuse me I will be going." With that I headed to the elevators and saw Kevin standing there waiting on me. "What took so long babe?" "The guard didn't believe me so I had to call the hotel management to straighten things out." He just smiled and shook his head. We stepped into the elevator and we headed upstairs. The doors opened and we headed to his room which was to become our room. We walked in and Kevin went to the stereo and pushed a CD in and pushed pause. "Babe listen to this song and know that no body comes close to you and that I love you with all my heart." When we turn out the lights The two of us alone together Something's just not right But girl you know that I would never Ever let anothers touch, come between the two of us 'Cause no one else will ever take your place No one else comes close to you No one makes me feel the way you do You're so special girl to me And you'll always be eternally Every time I hold you near You always say the words I love to hear Girl with just a touch you can do so much No one else comes close And when I wake up to The touch of your head on my shoulder You're my dream come true, oh yeah Girl you know I'll always treasure Every kiss and everyday I'll love you girl in every way And I always will, 'cause in my eyes Oh baby No one else comes close to you No one makes me feel the way you do You're so special girl to me And you'll always be eternally Every time I hold you near You always say the words I love to hear Girl with just a touch you can do so much Girl, can't you see No one else comes close to you No one makes me feel the way you do You're so special girl to me And you'll always be eternally Every time I hold you near You always say the words I love to hear Girl with just a touch you can do so much Girl, can't you see No one else comes close Damn I was being held by Kevin as the song ended. Some how Kevin knew when and what to say or do that would make my love for him grow more. **Back To Present** "You know Kevin, that through all the trials we went through I thinks that one was one of the hardest ones. It killed me to have to tell you what I did." I said to Kevin as I began to cry. To this day it hurt still knowing that I almost lost the one thing that meant the most to me. "I know babe but if I remember correctly though it was in Chicago that we ..." TBC... Don't you just hate that. I wander what is going to happen or did happen in Chicago. You never know so I guess you will just have to wait and see huh. Well bye for now.