Date: Mon, 03 Jul 2000 10:43:10 EDT From: Frnces O'Rtg Subject: Rude Awakening Final Rude Awakening Final Copyright 2000 By Francis O'Ratigan. All rights reserved. With the exceptions of short excerpts for critical reviews, no part of this work may be reproduced in any manner whatsoever without permission in writing from the Author. This story is complete fiction. This story in no way implies the ACTUAL sexual orientation or beliefs of Actual living people. In other words FICTION!! Any comments are welcome. Good or bad. Feel free to e-mail me at frnceso@hotmail.com Rude Awakening Chapter 23 "Now take it easy Jason, it is only your first day home from the hospital," Kevin said as he helped Jason into the house. Three weeks had passed since Jason was admitted into the hospital. And poor Kevin was going around like he was nuts making sure that all was in order for Jason's home coming. Justin and Johnny had tried to help but Kevin insisted that he do it all alone. You see when Justin decided to help put the party streamers up Johnny decided to mummy wrap poor Justin. Than he mummy wrapped Scrappy too. Kevin of course acted mad but inside he was laughing his head off. So he threw them out of the house early that morning to the mall to buy Jason a gift. (And about fifty dollars to keep Johnny occupied for a few hours.) "I'm fine Baby," Jason scolded Kevin as he swatted Kevin's hands away. "You heard the Doctor. The cancer is gone. The Chemo worked. Now all I want to do is get my old life back." Kevin looked at his lover and was pleased to see the old Jason back. He still had his hair missing but the Doctor said that would return in about a month. They still had to be careful about sex because it had only been a few days since the last dose of chemo. Jason's appetite was back and there was no stopping him. They walked into the living room to find it dark. "Who covered up the windows?" Jason asked as he reached for the light switch. "SURPRISE!!!" came a huge shout. The light was switched on and Jason let out a shout. "Well you didn't really expect us not to throw you a birthday party did you?" laughed Nick as he pulled Jason in a hug. "But my birthday is still months away!" exclaimed Jason. "That is where you are wrong Baby," said Kevin smiling down at Jason. "This is the first day of the rest of your life." Jason sat down in the first chair he got too. He looked around the room and saw all the gang from Nsync and the Backstreet Boys. Johnny was hiding behind Justin playing shy. He still wasn't used to having so many celebraties around. Even Scrappy was sitting at his feet with his paw in his lap. Tears came to his eyes and he grabbed Kevin's hand and kissed his hand. "Thank you Kevin," he sobbed out. Kevin leaned down and pulled him in a hug. "I am just so thankful to have you alive and well!" Kevin beamed. "Come on everyone let's eat!" exclaimed Johnny. Every one busted up laughing at Johnny's outburst. He just shrugged his shoulders and headed out to the back deck. Jason stood up and reached for Kevin's hand and allowed Kevin to lead him out. Once out there he was shocked again to see the spread of food and drink laid out on tables. It was catered so the guys didn't have to wait on them selves. Jason sat down in the chair that Kevin held out for him. "Let me get you something to drink while you are waiting on your dinner," Kevin said as he kissed Jason and took off in search of a drink for Jason. Jason leaned back in the lounge chair and closed his eyes. He could still remember the morning of his last Chemotherapy treatment. Flash back. "Morning sweetie," Kevin said with a grin on his face. Jason glared up at him. "What is so good about it?" he grumbled. "It is just another day in hell." Kevin looked hurt, "sorry Kevin," he mumbled looking down at his hands. The door opened and he looked up at the lab tech. He knew what was coming. They would spend the next 45 minutes to an hour trying to find a vein. He sighed and handed over his arm to the vampire. Kevin took a hold of his other hand. Jason smiled at Kevin. He winced as the needle pierced his skin. He could feel the needle hit the vein. He breathed a sigh of relief when he saw the back wash of blood in the IV needle. A minute later the IV was started with no problems. He took a deep breath in and only at that time did he realize that he had been holding his breath. "That was easy," commented Kevin as he gently cleaned the blood from Jason's arm. Jason nodded silently as he mentally prepared him self for the nausea and vomiting that he knew was following. He closed his eyes to get as much sleep as possible. He had learned long ago to sleep through these treatments. Kevin gathered him in his arms and held him until the Chemotherapy was done. Three hours later Jason woke up to a room full of people. Johnny was there looking worried as always. Justin was there too. He looked around for Kevin. "Where is Kevin?" he croaked out. Justin poured him some water but Jason shook his head no. He knew that it wouldn't stay down. "I'm here Babe," said a soft and deep voice. He looked over at the door to see Kevin walk through. The Doctor followed him and he was wearing a huge mile on his face. "What is going on?" Jason asked getting a little worried. "The Doctor wants to talk to you for a second," Kevin said with tears in his eyes. But Jason knew that they were happy tears. "What's going on Uncle Justin?" asked Johnny tugging on Justin's arm. Justin held his finger to his lips to signal to Johnny to be quiet. The Doctor sat down next to Jason. "I'll get straight to the point Jason," the Doctor said. "This was your last Chemotherapy session. The Cancer is gone and as far as we can tell you are cured!" Jason looked up at Kevin to see tears streaming down his face. He reached up and wiped them off. "Thank God," Jason breathed as he pulled Kevin down so that he could hug him. "Jason?" asked Kevin. Jason looked up and saw his lover standing over him with a drink in his hand. He reached up and took it and drank from it. He patted the seat beside him and Kevin sat down next to him. "Where were you sweetie?" asked Kevin. "Three days ago, when I got the news," Jason said taking another drink. Kevin snatched it from him and swiped a drink too. "I just can't believe that it is over." "Well the important thing is that you get your strength back. I've already scheduled you for a membership at the health club in town," Kevin said handing the drink back. "I hope you didn't mind." "No Babe, I just want to get back to my old self as quick as possible," Jason smiled up at him. "But the question I have for you, is what is being done about Johnny?" Kevin cringed as Jason asked that. "Keviiin," Jason said in a scolding voice. "What is going on?" "I wanted to wait until you were stronger," Kevin said stalling. "Tell me!" Jason ordered. Kevin sighed and stood up and took his hand and led Jason to their quiet spot. They stepped onto the gazebo and sat on the porch swing. "Are you comfortable?" Kevin asked pulling Jason to him so that he was holding him. "Yes I am fine, now quit stalling and tell me what is going on!" Jason demanded. "They are suing for custody," Kevin mumbled. Jason took a sudden breath in. "Our lawyers say we have a better than average chance of retaining custody," Kevin said trying to sooth Jason. "I don't want you worry about it Babe, I want you to concentrate on getting strong," Kevin said as he kissed Jason's neck. "I just can't believe that they are putting that poor child through this," Jason said in a angry voice. "That child has been through enough! He deserves to be happy!" Jason was getting agitated and that worried Kevin. "Jason you need to calm down," Kevin scolded quietly. Jason stopped ranting and just sulked for a few moments in Kevin's arms. "We will get through this Jas," Kevin tried to assure Jason. Jason nodded and than his stomach decided to growl. Kevin laughed as he helped Jason to his feet. "Come on Sweetie, let's get you fed." The two lovers made their way back to the party. Jason watched in amusement as Johnny pushed Justin in the pool. He of course had to jump in after him. Even Scrappy had made his way into the water and was barking and carrying on. Justin had grabbed Johnny and had him over his shoulder and was threatening to dump him in the pool. Johnny was squealing with laughter. Kevin decided to come to Johnny's rescue and dived in and tackled Justin bringing all three of them under water. Jason decided that he wanted a swim too so he went into the house and changed into the pair of swim trunks and joined them in the pool. It was refreshing to be in the pool and once Kevin spotted him he swam over to him and wrapped his arms around him and kissed him on the lips. "Hi Sexy!" exclaimed Jason. Kevin blushed and guided them to the edge of the pool where the table was set up. Kevin helped Jason out of the water and sat down next to him and started eating. The rest of the meal was pleasant and everyone enjoyed each other's company. Jason was happy to be able to eat a meal without worrying about throwing it up. He ate until he could eat no more. And Johnny and Justin amused every one by a new dance routine that they had worked out. Johnny was good dancer something that Kevin and Jason would encourage. Scrappy was going from person to person begging hand outs. Jason noticed that he was getting a little fat and would have to go on a diet. Later that night. South Fork was quiet for the night. Not the type of quiet that had plagued the mansion all those months ago. This quiet was a peaceful quiet, the kind of quiet that settles over a home where almost everything is in its proper place. Johnny and Justin were upstairs playing. Justin had taken his duties as an adopted uncle very seriously. And Johnny loved the idea of having Justin for an Uncle. He had even developed a new crush. This one was Rich of LFO. Justin found it amusing that he could be replaced so easily but he had fun finding Johnny all the posters and magazines with pictures of Johnny's new crush. He had to admit it Rich was a hottie. Kevin and the rest of the Backstreet Boys were meeting in Jason's study to discus plans now that Jason was in remission. Kevin had a lot of thinking to do. He wanted to be back on stage doing what he loved most in the world, singing. But he realized that he had other duties. He wanted a chance to be a father to Johnny and a good and loyal husband to Jason. "So Kevin the ball is in your court," said Brian as he took a drink of some of Jason's brandy. "When are you and most importantly do you want to perform again? Management has been throwing the idea around that maybe we should replace you." "Jason is in remission Kevin," spoke up AJ. "We miss you buddy, and most importantly the fans miss you. We are a group of five not four." "I do want to perform again guys, but--," started Kevin. "Oh boy here we go again," grumbled Nick. This got a smack to the back of the head from AJ. "Well it's true!" whined Nick. "He always has some excuse to postpone his return! And frankly I'm tired of it!" There was silence in the room as the four singers gave Kevin a few moments to comprehend. "So what is the excuse now!" Nick insisted. Kevin glared at him for a few moments and than got up and poured himself some brandy to. "I can't leave South Fork right now," he said bluntly. "I have Johnny to think about. He loves us and we love him and if we don't fight for him he is going back to his parents. The same ones the left him on the doorstep of the hospital almost 9 years ago!" The other singers nodded quietly understanding with the exception of Nick. "Johnny ! Johnny! It is always about that little brat!" he shouted at Kevin. Kevin jumped up and went to grab Nick but was restrained by Brian. "Take is easy Cousin!" ordered Brian. "Nick doesn't know what he is saying." Brian said glaring at Nick. "Johnny is depending on us. I will not abandon him!" Kevin said glaring daggers at Nick. "But Kevin," Brian said softly. "Management is going to want to replace you." "Than let them!" Kevin shouted. "I will not leave Johnny to the dogs!" Kevin stormed out of the room slamming the study door. He stormed out onto the porch and plopped down on one of the chairs. He looked out over the front lawn of the estate. The summer gardens were in full bloom now. The Honey Suckle season has long since died out. It had just rained a short time ago so the air was full of the fresh clean smell after a shower. Kevin took a deep breath of the fresh night air. The crickets were chirping in the night air. Kevin wanted to scream at the whole world but the peace and quiet that surrounded him seemed too sacred to disturb. "So they ganged up on you," said a voice startling Kevin. He looked across the porch to see Jason sitting in a porch swing. He patted the seat beside him. "Come on over and keep me company," he grinned as he scooted over to make room for Kevin. Kevin smiled and made his way over to his lover. Once seated beside him Jason pulled him in his arms and rested his head on Kevin's shoulder. "Want to tell me about it?" "Nick is being a child," Kevin said glaring up at the sky. "I mean he wants me to drop everything and go back on the road." "Why don't you?" Jason asked. Kevin jerked himself away from Jason but Jason pulled him back down. "I'm being the devil's advocate here Kevin, play along." "Johnny," Kevin said bluntly. "We are in a middle of a court battle for custody of him. I can't leave now. Plus there is you, you are barely on your feet. I want to be with you during your recovery." "Baby, what do you want to with the rest of your life?" asked Jason as he kissed Kevin's neck. "First I want to be a good life partner to you, second a good father to Johnny, and lastly I want to be in the music entertainment business," Kevin said returning the kiss Jason gave him. "But I will not sacrifice Johnny's or your happiness for the my career! God I am so fucking confused!!" He shouted as he bureied his head into his hands. Jason scooted forward and wrapped his arms around Kevin's shoulders. "Oh Baby I know that you are confused. Your being pulled into two directions at once. But know this, I love you very much and will support you in whatever decision that you make," Jason said. "If you choose your new family than Nick and the rest of the guys will just have to understand that your family comes first! And if they don't I'll beat them up for you," giggled Jason. Kevin laughed at the thought of Jason taking on the entire group. "Hey don't laugh! Give me a few months and I will be as good as new." "I'm sorry sweetie," giggled Kevin. "It's just when I picture you beating up the guys it just struck me as funny." Jason stuck out his lip in a pout and Kevin caught it and kissed him. "MMM I could get used to this," Jason said grinning as he rested his head on Kevin's forehead. He reached over and started playing with Kevin's buttons on his shirt. Soon he had Kevin's buttons all undone. Kevin grinned down at his lover. "Umm Jas?" he asked. "Hush!" scolded Jason as he kissed Kevin's chest. "I am busy!" Kevin laughed and pulled Jason up and caught Jason's pouty lips in a kiss. He slid his tongue into Jason's mouth. Jason let out a moan and slid his tongue into Kevin's mouth. After a few moments of kissing Kevin broke away. "Why did you stop?" Jason asked. "Are you all right with this?" Kevin asked concerned. "I mean you just got out of the hospital and all and I don't --," started Kevin only to be interupted by Jason's lips as the pressed against Kevin's. He broke away and took Kevin's hand and helped him to his feet. "This night is all about my love for you," Jason said as his eyes traveled down Kevin's body. Kevin blushed and followed Jason up the stairs. ************************* Jason woke the next morning. He swung out of bed and noticed the tendorness. Kevin was a little rough on him. He smiled at the memory of last night's love making. Kevin was gentle and rough at the same time. It was understandable due to the fact that they hadn't been intimate for over a month. Jason made his way slowly down the stairs and into the living room. He spotted Nick sitting on the couch drinking a cup of coffee. "Morning Nick," Jason said with a small wave of the hand. Nick grumbled something back. Jason picked up on his rotten attitude right away. Jason sighed and sat next to him. Nick started to stand up but Jason grabbed his arm and pulled him back down. "Not so fast mister!" Jason said firmly. "You and I are going to have a talk!" Nick sighed and sat back down. "You and Johnny are holding Kevin back!" he said bluntly. Jason stared at him for a few moments. "Let's be honest Nick. Are we holding Kevin back or are we holding you back?" Jason asked back just as bluntly. "Kevin wants a family in the worst way possible. You and the group are going to have accept that." Nick stood up and walked to the window glaring out it. He spun around and stomped over to Jason and grabbed him and pulled him up. "I want you to break things off with Kevin," he demanded. Jason shoved him off and walked over to the same window. "No!" shouted Jason. "God Nick I can't believe you just asked me to do that! I love Kevin and he loves me and Johnny. He wants a life with us!" ************************************* Kevin woke the next morning to find that Jason was gone. He got up any way and made his way down stairs. On his way he ran into Johnny as he came charging down the hall. Kevin jumped back to avoid getting hurt. Kevin had long ago given up trying to make the eight year old walk in the house. "He is always on the go isn't he?" asked Justin as he came up behind Kevin. "Yea well he is a growing boy and full of energy," Kevin commented. As they headed down stairs he heard Nick's voice yelling. Kevin rounded the corner to see Johnny paused at the doorway. Kevin put his hand on Johnny's shoulder and Johnny looked up with tears in his eyes. Kevin soon discovered the reason for them. "I don't care about that Jason!" Nick shouted. "I wish that you and that little brat hadn't of stepped into Kevin's life. You two is going to be the cause of the Backstreet Boys ruin!" Johnny turned and ran upstairs. Kevin went to follow him but Justin stopped him. "Let me go," Justin said. "You go take care of Nick!" Justin turned and ran up stairs. Kevin sighed heavily as he opened the door of the living room and stepped in. Jason had Nick by the shirt collar pushed up against the wall and he had his hand drew back as if he was going to hit Nick. "What the hell is going on!" shouted Kevin. Nick wrenched him self away from Jason and straightened out his shirt. "I want you to know that Johnny just heard every thing you said Nick." "Great Nick!" Jason shouted. "Now what are you going to do? Are you going to step on his heart too?" Nick glared at Jason and sat down. ******** Justin stood outside the door and knocked. "Johnny?" he asked softly. "Can I come in?" The door slowly opened and Justin stepped in. Johnny made his way back to the bed and sat down on it. "Nick hates me doesn't he?" he whimpered out looking up at Justin. Justin sat next to him and pulled the small child in his arms. "Nick is just scared is all Johnny," Justin said as he kissed to the top of Johnny's head. Johnny snuggled closer to Justin and wrapped his arms around his neck. "I don't want to leave!" Johnny sobbed out. "Is Dad going to make me leave?" "Kevin and Jason loves you very much," Justin said as he wiped the tears from Johnny's face. "Kevin is not going to make you leave." "But what about the court stuff?" Johnny asked scrunching up his nose. "What if the judge says I have to go with them?" "We just have to pray that the Judge sees that you are happy with Kevin and Jason. You should tell the judge what you want," Justin said. "But I am scared," Johnny said. "We all are Johnny," said Justin in a quiet voice. "But we are doing everything in our power to keep with us." He heard a knock on the door. "Can I come in?" asked Kevin. Justin patted Johnny on the head and left the room. Kevin sat down next to Johnny and Johnny wrapped his arms around Kevin's neck. "Nick is so sorry for what he said about you," Kevin said pulling Johnny closer. "You know what today is?" Johnny nodded and sniffled. "It's the day the judge tells me who I am going to live with," he mumbled. "You know that whatever happens that Jason and I will always love you," Kevin said softly. Johnny nodded. "Let's get ready so we are not late." The two got up and left the bedroom and headed down stairs. Once they reached to the bottom of the stairs they ran into Nick. Nick had tears running down his cheeks. He knelt down beside Johnny. "Johnny, I want to apologies for what I said this morning. I really care about you and don't want you to ever leave," Nick said softly. "Forgive me?" Johnny wrapped his arms around his neck and hugged him for a few moments. ************************************* "So how do you think it is going to go?" asked Jason as he slid his arm around Kevin's waste. Kevin shrugged his shoulders. Jason understood why Kevin was so quiet. He was about to either loose his son or gain his son. Jason was scared for the three of them. "The Warren County Domestic Court is now in session. The Honorable Judge Warrant persiding. All rise!" bellowed the Bailer. Jason stood with his husband and looked down at Johnny. He was trying so hard to be brave. The Judge took his seat and rapped the bench with his gavel. "I'll get right to the point," Honorable Warrant said. "The question before this court is simply, should Custody of young Johnny Nicholson be granted to his biological Parents or should he remain in the Custody of Kevin and Jason Richardson? My Judgement is that Johnathan Nicholson will be placed in the custody of Mr. & Mrs. Johnathan Nicholson. No visitation rights is to be granted to either Kevin or Jason Richardson." The gavel slammed down on final time and the judge stood and left the room. Johnny was grabbed screaming from Kevin's arms by the bailer and led out of the court room. Kevin collasped in the chair with his hands buried in his hands. Jason reached out to his husband only to be pushed away as he got up and left the courtroom. Justin came up behind Jason and wrapped his arms around Jason. Jason sat silently for almost an hour before finally getting up and leaving the court room. Once outside the Court house he looked for Kevin. There was no sign of him. He climbed into the waiting car and instructed the driver to take him home. ********* At South Fork. Jason stepped into the house and called out Kevin's name. When he got no response he made his way upstairs and into the bed room. He found a note attatched to the pillow that Kevin had used. My Dearest Jason, This is going to hurt me so much to say what I must. I am leaving. I need time to gather my thoughts. I need time to decide what I am going to do with my life. I thought that Johnny was going to be a part of that life but it just wasn't in the cards. But what about us? I know that is the question on your mind. I don't know about us. I love you so much that it hurts. I need time Jas. I do love you and I want you to be a part of my life. Just not right now. Please understand that I love you. Kevin PS Watch for me at the Front Gate. >From Jason's point of view. I stood there staring at the letter. For some strange reason there were no tears. Only me standing in the room alone with a letter that Kevin had written. I heard the sound of a car driving off. I walked to the window and looked out. It was Kevin's car. I watched in silence as the car approached the gates and drove through them. For the rest of the evening I sat at the bedroom window. The house was empty now. And for some reason it seemed right. Scrappy was laying at my feet. "Come on boy, let's go get some dinner," I said as I stood up and walked out of the room. And with that June 28, 2000 came to a close. The End E-mail me what you think frnceso@hotmail.com (Preview of Begin Anew) September 28, 2003 "Driver pull over please?" I asked as I looked at the gate. I climbed out of the car and walked to the gates. I reached into my pocket and pulled out a remote I hadn't used it in over three years. I looked at it longingly. I was sure that the batteries had long since died. With a trembling hand I pushed the power button and to my shock the gates slid back to allow access to the grounds. I looked back at the car. "You can head back to the air port. I will walk from here." I started up the long driveway. The asphalt was cracked in some places. It was obvious that it wasn't used much. I looked up at the house. It was just as I remembered it. Except that the paint was peeling around the windows. There was a loneliness about the house. The front door was closed and the porch chairs were turned with the backs facing the driveway. I also noticed that the gardens were long gone. Replaced by simple grass. It too was turning brown as the fall weather was fast approaching. I stepped onto the front porch and reached for the door handle. The Front door swung open and from the sound of the hinge it needed oiling. "Johnny?" said a haunting voice from my past. "Is that you?" I was confused. Who was Johnny? Oh God did he replace me? "If that is you remember that we need to go to the gate in a few minutes." I heard him cross over to the entrance way and heard him take a sudden breath in. "Kevin?" He asked. I looked up at him and tears came to my eyes. God he was so beautiful. It was like time stood still for him. "Yea," I mumbled out looking down at my feet. "It's me." That is all you get. Do I have you tastebudds going? Frances O'Ratigan. Let me know what you think.