I was sitting on my computer tonight when I thought of this story. Remembered it actually. I wrote it a few months ago and hadn't given it a thought it a while till now. Only a few people have read it, so I hope you guys think it's alright. It's a VERY SMALL 4 parter. So I'm just sending them all at once. I hope you guys like it. If you do, please send feedback to nsyncforever@ureach.com thanks :)

**This is fiction and doesn't imply anything about anyone involved. If this is illegal to view, leave, like ya havn't heard that already.**

~ Searching So Hard To Find ~

~ Part 1 ~

Justin sat alone in the bus, gazing out the window dreamily. He was in pain, he was hurting more than he ever had in his life that day. All he could think about was love and how much he wanted to have someone to love, cherish and adore. Someone to be there for him when he needed it, someone to hold him throughout the night. Someone to spend the rest of his life with.

He looked outside and saw Lance and Sarah sitting on a picnic table talking and laughing.  They said they were only friends, but Justin could tell it was more, the way they smiled when they talked and the little whispers they passed. They were in love. It seemed to Justin that he was the only one in the world that didn't have anyone to love him. Well yeah, plenty of people loved him, the guys loved him, his family loved him, the fans loved him, but not the way he wished to be loved.

He heard giggles coming from the back of the bus, JC and his girlfriend Valerie. They were an excellent couple, they seemed just right for each other, they complimented each other perfectly, Justin had never seen JC happier with a woman in his life. Justin thought of Chris and how much he envied him. Chris and Dani had announced their engagement a few months prior. They had been engaged about a month before they announced it publicly, worried it would hurt their career as it had with the Backstreet Boys. They were all shocked to find most of the fans were happy for him. Congratulations cards were pouring in and whenever they had a meet n greet, everyone would tell Chris how happy they were he was getting married. He'd heard plenty of people tell him it was about time.

Justin felt a tear fall down his cheek as he thought about the love he didn't have. The love that was the only thing that was left to make him complete.


Justin slouched as he walked the streets of the sea side town they had stopped at. There was no show that night, and everyone was too busy with their girls to hang out with Justin. Finally after sitting in the bus alone for a few hours he became ansy to get out. As he walked the street he shivered as the cool ocean air glided through his body.

As Justin walked he saw people pass him by and not even give him a second glance. "I'm never gonna find love." he thought to himself as he stopped in front of a bar. Glad he was finally 21, he stepped into the bar and sat down at a booth in a dark corner. The bartender came over and asked what he wanted to drink. Justin grabbed his wallet and pulled out the first bill his fingers landed on. He looked to see it was a 50. He handed it to the bartender and told him to keep them coming until the money ran out or he left.

Drink after drink he swallowed his sorrow. His head in his hands he realized what this was doing to him. It was hurting him so bad not to have anyone and he realized it was slowly dragging him into a depression.

He knew he had had way too many drinks as he stumbled out of the bar. He attempted to walk back to the bus, but his drunken stupor was making it difficult on him. As he stumbled into a park, he plopped himself down on a bench, only to pass out a moment later.