Date: Wed, 26 Jul 2000 12:58:50 -0700 From: Denzil Cuddy Subject: Story of my Love installment 4 Part Four!! I am sure you have all been anxiously awaiting this!! (Not really, but I have been looking forward to getting it out and everything!) I am amazed that I have gotten up to four, but here is the proof! Thanks for reading everyone, and keep sending those e-mails....if you hate it, love it, or see a way for it to be better I want to hear about it! LOL Thanks again. If you should not be reading this, DON'T...use the political system and change stupid laws! I do not know Nsync, I would love to meet them, but I would only be disappointed as they would not be anything like my characters. Well, I would also recommend to everyone the following stories "Brian and Me" "My Surprise Romance" by the talented Gabriela "Superman Can't Fly" which is absolutely wonderful!! "Lance in Shining Armor" Which is sad and perfect, LOL Well, on with the show. I woke up snuggled to a pillow. I was shocked for a moment and wondered where Lance had gone. The small clock on the night stand said it was only 9:30!! I groan at the sunlight streaming through the window and pull the covers up over my head. Why would anyone get up so early! Argh...that is the curse of being on tour though, you get used to waking up early and can not help it. I sigh as I throw the blanket back stand up and stretch. My back pops like always and I walk to the bathroom. I open the door and there stands Lance. I smile as he jumps a little at the intrusion, and almost drops his toothbrush. I just lean against the door and smile at him a little bigger. "Good morning!! Did you sleep well?" I ask as he finishes up with his dental hygiene. "Yeah, thanks for staying. I didn't wake you up did I?? You were sleeping so peacefully I tried to be quiet as I got out of bed." "Nah, I woke up all on my own, snuggled to a pillow that smells wonderfully like my new boyfriend." I stop as I realize what I have just called Lance. I blush furiously and wait for his reply. The moment of silence is drawing out into an eternity...and I feel trapped. He finally smiles. I sigh in relief and hug him. "JC, I never knew you cared." He chuckles as I punch him gently in the arm. He starts to walk back into the bedroom and turns to see if I'm coming. "I uh have to do my morning rounds." I smile as he blushes and I close the bathroom door. I emerge a moment or two later with a much emptier bladder and a happier perspective on life. Lance is sitting on the foot of the bed in a pale green t-shirt and a pair of shorts. He is so cute with the light from the window framing him. I walk over and pick up my t-shirt and pants off the floor and pull them on. He looks at me a little sad and I can not help but smile. "What did you think I was going to walk around in nothing but my boxer briefs all day??" He blushes a little as I say this. I laugh and muss his hair. He glares for a moment before the smile breaks free. "No, I knew you would get dressed at some point in time, I was just hoping it would be a little later. I was enjoying the view." He blushes at his own statement and I can not keep my heart from melting. I sit next to him on the bed and pull him into a kiss. It lasts several minutes and we roll all over the recently made bed. We are both out of breath when we are finished. "I've have to go to my room to shower and change." He frowns a little as I say this. "Well, we'll probably all meet in Chris's room in a little while, so I probably won't see you until then. I'll miss you." He hugs me and I hug him back. It is touching really cause' I will miss him too. "Are you going to tell the others? I'm not rushing you or anything but we have to be careful in public, I don't want to have to be all sneaky in the hotels, and on the bus. Do you think you are ready, I will be there for you all the way." He looks down at the floor. I can almost hear him thinking. It is an intense moment, and I am beginning to wonder if I should have said anything. He finally looks up with a bland serene face. "Yes, I want to tell them this morning. I want to be with you and love you , and get to know you. The only way for that to happen is for me to tell them. Plus that way I will be able to kiss you on the bus and at breakfast." The smile on his face is contagious and we both laugh as I make my way out of his room after several more kisses. I get into my room without incident and then the phone rings. "Hello?" "Hey, JC, it's Justin. I was wondering if we are still going shopping today?" "Sure Justin, looking forward to it. I am sure Lance will be with us, is that cool?" I feel a little apprehension toward the three of us being together. I think of the chat Justin and I had yesterday and I smile at my paranoia. Justin is cool with me, and everything will be fine. "O.k. that is cool, by the way we are meeting in Chris's room in about ten minutes for breakfast." I hear a little disappointment in Justin's voice, and I am a little shocked. He and Lance have always gotten along rather well, being close in age and all. I thought he would be happy that Lance was coming along. I hear a bit of a sigh on the phone, and wonder what is going through Justin's mind. "O.k. Curly, I'll see you there." I hang up and run to the bathroom. I quickly shower and change clothes. I don't bother combing my hair, and just run my fingers through it as I walk down the hall. I knock on the door and Chris says to come in. I am the first one there. I smile as I sit on the bed next to the headboard. "Good morning sunshine!!" Chris yells as I rub my eyes and lean back on the bed. "No sleeping in my room unless you are me!" I chuckle at his mirth and overbearing humor. He laughs heartily at his own joke. "Good morning Chris, so what did you and Justin do yesterday?" "We went and saw The Phantom of the Opera, and then to McDonalds. It was a blast man. You should have come along. You never seem to do anything with us anymore. I'm glad you and Justin are going out today, maybe you two can get back to your old selves." Chris sighs a little wistfully here, and I wonder what all he and Justin have talked about. "Then last night we went to a couple of new clubs and a couple of old ones. Again, not quite the same without you, you're the only one who can keep up with me in the drinking contests! No hangover, though, thanks to Joey and his watching of our alcohol consumption. He's a good man our Joey, I just want to kill him some of the time." "Chris, Justin isn't old enough to drink anyway, you shouldn't buy him alcohol." I frown at him. Now that Justin and I are friends again I feel a little protective. "It's cool though as long as you watch out for him, and it's not like I've never done it. So, anyway, I can't believe I am the first one here." We both chuckle at my fabled lateness, and sit quietly for a moment. Neither of us are early risers by nature. Before Chris or I can say anything else there comes a knock on the door. Chris yells to come in and in walks Lance. He smiles when he sees me and I know I have a goofy grin on my face too. He jumps on the bed, bouncing around like an elementary school kid. I laugh and bounce around a little starting to get in the mood. "Ha! No jumping on my bed!" Chris says as he laughs at the over enthusiastic Lance. Lance looks hurt and Chris seems happy about this. The pillow crashes into Chris's head and Lance hoots in laughter, holding his sides and rolling on the bed. Chris jumps up pillow in hand and a big goofy grin on his face. "Pillow Fight!!" He screams as he whacks me with the pillow, I would have had time to dodge had I not been so caught up in watching Lance. I roll on the bed laughing trying to fend off the pillow. Suddenly Lance is pummeling Chris with the other pillow from the bed and I roll free. I grab a cushion off the chair and head back to the fray. There is a knock at the door and we all three look quietly at one another. "Come in" Chris yells and Justin walks in. He looks at all of for a moment and then laughs. We attack and he falls under the barrage of pillows. Justin is begging fore mercy and we are just about ready to stop when the door opens. We all laugh as Joey just walks in and stares. He must have sensed what was coming as he turns and runs back out the door, we give chase. We run down the hall as Joey disappears into his room he emerges a few moments later with two pillows and throws one to Justin who has been walking warily behind us. We all laugh and yell as we pummel one another with goose down softness. It is wonderful, and I feel like everything is finally back to normal. Finally we all wind up in a big pile in the middle of the hallway laughing and joking. It is amazing. The bell rings for the elevator. We all watch as the bell boy brings out the cart and smiles at all of us. Joey gives him a twenty dollar tip and a wink. We all laugh as we push the cart of food into the room and close the door behind us. We tear into the food and make big pigs of ourselves. "So, what is everyone doing today?" Joey finally asks between bits of his blueberry muffin. "Well, I think Lance Justin and I are going to go spend a lot of money. I know Justin has not bought any new sneakers in a while, so he's way passed due." We all laugh as I say this, Justin's love of sneakers becoming as infamous within the group as without. "I'm going to go to the pool, and maybe catch a sauna. A movie tonight would be great! Does anyone want to go with?" "I'll go to the movie if I'm back!" Justin says excited at the offer of a free movie. "Well, I think I am going to the pool too, sounds fun. I'll tag along to that movie tonight if that's cool with you two?" Joey says as he looks at Chris and Justin who nod their approval at the plan. Lance stands up and clears his throat. We all turn and look at him, and he blushes slightly under our collective gaze. I smile my encouragement at him. I know how hard this can be. "I have something I need to share with everyone." Lance slowly says. We all sit and wait in silence. There is a bit of tension in the air. Lance does not usually stand up and give speeches in the middle of breakfast. I can see worry on the faces around me. I also notice a bit of apprehension on Justin's face. "Well, get on with it Lansten!" Chris says and he and Justin laugh at Lance's apparent discomfort. "It's o.k. Lance, take your time." Joey says from the floor by the bed. We all wait. Finally Lance speaks. "I have been thinking about some things lately and I just need to share them with you all. First of all let me say that I love each of you and would never do anything to endanger our friendship or our careers. You guys are my family now, and I love you all so much. Let me also say that I did not come to this conclusion lightly. I have given it much thought, and have just come to the conclusion that it is the way it is." We all smile and tell Lance how much he means to us. He blushes under our praise. I fall even more for him now that I can see his courage. He stands there with determination all over his face and I can see his hands shaking a little. He shoves his hands into his pockets, and I can not help but smile. "Well, I suppose there is no easy way to say this so I'm just gonna do it quick like a band-aid. I'm gay." Lance blushes deeply and looks down at the floor intently. I stand up and put my arm around him. He is shaking and my heart breaks for him. Silence fills the room. I notice how is southern accent is much stronger now when his emotions are high and he doesn't have time to control it. Joey stands up. "Is that all Scoop, you had me worried there for a moment. I love ya man, no matter what. You are a great friend, and an even better brother. It's cool with me." He hugs Lance and stands beside him. Joey and I look at Chris and Justin sitting in silence. Chris jumps up. "Well, cool, works for me. One less person trying to pick up the hotties at the club if you ask me. Besides now JC and Lance can talk about all the cute guys they see." Chris pulls us both into a hug. Lance is crying and I feel like I am about ready to. We all look at Justin. He sits there for a moment longer. He then stands up and looks intently at me and then at Lance. His face is blank and I can't recognize the look in his eyes. He looks at Chris and Joey as if they have grown a second head. I see a bit of a smirk spread across his face. "Well, if figures! You two can go shopping by your frickin' selves. I can't believe this, first my best friend in the world tells me this shit, and now another one!! No way man, y'all can just shove off and stay out of my face! I need you for the band, and to avoid publicity, but I will be damned if I associate with you outside of that! I can NOT believe this! Jesus, is any one else in here a FAG?? Or do we have to wait several months between announcements?" I am shocked by the word "fag". I can not believe that Justin is acting like this. My heart hurts, and I feel sorry for my once friend. My heart hurts, and I just want to shake Justin and ask him why. To show him how badly he has hurt his friends with his thoughtlessness. I feel Lance shudder at the words and I hear the little sob he tries to hide. Something inside me snaps and I am across the room before I know it. I hit Justin as hard as I can, and he falls to the floor. I go to pummel him and I feel Joey pulling me away. Justin jumps up and is charging at me when Chris grabs him and holds him back. I am screaming at him. I want him to hurt as badly as I do, as badly as he has hurt Lance. Lance is by my side, telling me it is going to be all right. He rubs my back and Joey pulls me out of the room. Lance comes along, and the door clicks shut behind us. I can still hear Justin screaming, and suddenly my anger is gone. I am crying and in Lances arms. He is holding me and rubbing my back. I can not stop the torrent that has finally found release. We stumble into Joey's room and sit on the bed. Joey is pacing back and forth, his expression looks as dark as mine. I feel lost, only Lance is holding me to reality. His arms are around me and I sob onto his shoulder as he sobs onto mine. "SHIT!! I can not believe that little prick!" Joey finally says as he drops into one of the chairs. "I am glad that you nailed him JC! He had no right to react that way." I smile a little as I pull away from Lance, and look over to see that Lance has a bit of a smile starting too. "I don't know, something just snapped. I mean for him to hurt me when I came out is one thing, but to hurt my Lance! Hell no, I won't just sit back and take that." I reach over and hug Lance. "By the way Joe, JC and I are dating. Only two days now, but we really like one another." Lance says as he walks to the bathroom to get some tissue. "Cool, congratulations JC. You too Lance, you guys are both great and deserve happiness. I have to admit to you though, I am a little crazy myself. I'm not saying I'm bi or gay or anything, I believe the proper way to describe me is a hedonist. If I enjoy it I will give it a try. So, I'm glad you guys are finally being honest, honesty is the first step on the road to happiness." Lance and I stare at Joey for a moment. It was wonderful what he said. I feel closer to Joey then than I ever have. I stand up and go over and give him a hug, Lance joins in. That's when we hear the faint knocking at the door. Joey grimaces and walks over to the door. "Who is it?" He asks in a gruff voice. I am amazed, I have never heard him sound so threatening, I would never have imagined that it was possible. I smile at his protectiveness. "It's Chris, can I come in?" Joey opens the door and lets Chris squeeze through into the room. The door is immediately shut and locked behind him. Chris looks a bit startled when he sees Lance and I in the room. I smile a bit as I pull Lance closer to me on the bed and leave my arm around his shoulders. Chris drops into the chair closest to the door. "I'm so sorry guys, I don't know what Justin was thinking. I hope we can all work this out." There was sincerity on Chris's voice, and I knew that he was going to try and play the roll of peacemaker. "I know what he was thinking. He was being his bigoted self, and inflecting pain on those around him. He hurt Lance and I on purpose, and with malicious intent. We can and will work this out when he comes to us with a sincere apology." I say this a little too heatedly and can feel the blood rushing to my face. I clench my fist and feel Lance's arms around me. I smile and relax against him. "JC and I are together by the way." Lance says as he places a small kiss on my cheek. I see a look of surprise on Chris's face, but he seems cool with it. He finally smiles. "Well, the good news is everyone in the group is good with one another with the exception of Justin. Don't worry guys I will work on him. Hey, guys, lets give Justin and y'all some time to cool down and we can meet in my room and try to have a discussion. If not tonight, then tomorrow?" Chris stands and walks over to Lance and I and pulls us into a hug. He then walks over and hugs Joey, before saying his goodbyes. "So, do you two feel like going to the mall, I know shopping always helps me to relax." I chuckle a bit and look over to Lance. He has a small smile on his face, but he nods at me. "Sure, Joe, give us say an hour to get back to normal looking, and we'll meet you downstairs at the limo." Joey agrees and Lance and I go to our separate rooms to shower and change. Even though I had showered just a few minutes ago I needed another one. The emotions had left a residual feeling of dirtiness behind. I hated that I had to hit Justin. I hated it more than anything, but I could not let him get away with what he had said to Lance. I sigh as I slip on comfortable white long sleeve shirt and some loose jeans. I pull on my favorite pair of old sneakers, my trusty ball cap, and a pair of Oakley sunglasses. I open the door to find Justin standing there ready to knock. I stop in shock, my eyes growing wide behind my glasses. Justin tries to smile, but falters before he has even begun. A small frown forms instead. I feel my anger returning, and I go to move past him pulling the door shut behind me. "JC, wait, I need to talk." He says grabbing my arm as I try to walk away. "Justin, we will all sit down and talk in the morning, in Chris's room. I can't and won't talk to you right now. Unless you want two black eyes I suggest you let go of me right now!" I say to him trying to control my anger. Trying not to snap and beat that little frown off of my former friends face. His hand falls off my arm. "I'm so sorry JC, I don't know what I was thinking. Please tell Lance I'm sorry!" I look behind me and see that he is on his knees with tears streaming down his face. My anger falters as I see this. My stubbornness wins out though, and I turn and walk away. I reach Lance's door and knock. I am waiting for the door to open as I feel a weight drop on my back. I fall to the floor and flip around to see who it is. I am startled to see Justin sitting above me, and his fist suddenly collides with my nose. I must have blacked out for a moment but as I come to, Lance is standing over me yelling at Justin who is sprawled on the floor across the hall. Joey comes running down the hall, and stops win he sees this tableau. Justin stands and walks down the hall. "Get the hell away form my room you skinny little prick!!" Lance screams as Justin limps away. I can not help but laugh. Lance looks down at me and immediately is back to his normal caring self. He reaches down his hand and helps me up. "Are you o.k.?" Lance asks as he pulls me into a hug. My nose is bleeding and I have my hand up to catch the blood before it falls on him. I nod my head as he pulls me into his open door and back to his bathroom. He pulls out a handful of tissue and holds it to my nose. I smile and take them from him. Joey pokes his head in the door. "So, Scoop, what happened?" He has a bit of a smile on his face. "Someone knocked on my door and when I came out, I saw Justin on top of JC. Before I could do anything, Justin slugged him! I just kind of snapped and kicked his ass! No one does that to someone I care about! Geesh I just snapped when I say him hit my baby." I grab Lance and pull him into a hug. "Go, Lansten, I never knew you had it in you!" Joey has this lopsided grin on his face. I think he is genuinely proud of Lance. I hug my boy a little tighter. Lance blushes under this scrutiny. "Well, I guess all that time at the gym finally paid off. Yeah, I'm bad." We all three laugh as Lance says this. He is adorable. "So, do you two still want to go shopping, I feel like spending obscene amounts of money! Come on!" Joey says pulling on Lance's arm. "I want to, come on baby lets go." I say to Lance. "O.k. but you have to watch my back! I can't always be there to save you." He smiles to let me know he is joking. I grab his butt. "Don't worry, I always watch your back." This causes a good healthy blush from Lance, and a rolling laugh from Joey. I smile wickedly as I pull the tissue from my face now that the bleeding has stopped. "Lets go!" Joey says as he runs out the door. Lance and I smile and follow a little more slowly behind our energetic friend. The elevator dings and we walk into the waiting elevator. ----------------Justin------------------ Justin stumbles down the hall holding his side. He finally reaches Chris's door and knocks loudly. He waits for a moment and was just about to walk on down to his room, when the door opened. Chris looks at his friend for a moment, and then pull him into a hug. "What happened Curly?" "I slugged JC, and then Lance beat the hell out of me. I don't guess hitting him in front of Lance's door wasn't the best idea." Justin chuckles a little at his on stupidity. "No, definitely not the best idea. Hitting someone in front of their boyfriends door." Chris stops as he realizes he has just told Justin that JC and Lance are dating. "What, they're dating!! Oh, man that is great!" Chris stares at Justin for a moment, and just gets more confused as he thinks about it. "Justin, you hit JC, Lance kicked the shit out of you, and you called the two of them fags. Now you are happy that they are together. What the hell is going through your mind?" Chris can not help but laugh at the apparent contradictory nature of his friend. "I don't know how to explain Chris. When JC first told us I told my mom and she convinced me about how wrong it was to be gay. I still care for JC, it's just that he hit me with this out of the blue. It shocked the hell out of me. I turned away from him, and he turned away from me. I missed him but I found you, but he was alone. Then, today, we were supposed to get together and hang. Then Lance was coming along, and then Lance told us his secret. I just snapped too much information. I struck out, and I couldn't stop myself. Do you think we can work through this?" "Sure we will find a way. Don't expect to be best friends with JC again, but I think we can all be friends still." Chris smiles and pats Justin's arm. "Then I just wanted to talk to JC after he hit me. I went to his room a little while ago, and he just wouldn't talk to me at all. He ignored me!" Justin wipes a few tears from his face and babbles on. "I don't know why but it just made me snap. I decided I would get even, and that's when Lance stepped in." Justin grimaces as Chris rubs his shoulders. "I'm so stupid sometimes!!" Chris smiles at his friends demeanor. It is easy to forget how young Justin is sometimes, but then he does something like he did today, and you remember. It is something that only the unpredictable nature of youth can come close to excusing. Chris loses his smile as he thinks of all the damage he and the guys are going to have to repair. "You want to go with me to the liquor store?" "Why are we going to a liquor store?" Justin asks. "Well if we are all going to sit down in my room tonight and talk, we are going to need something to help us work through it. To lose our inhibitions and numb the pain. Come on, let's go." With that Chris and Justin stand and walk out of the room down the hall to the elevator. It is going to be along night. Well, there it is part 4!! Wow...let me know what you think, help me out. I like my story, but let me know what you all think. I want this to be fun for all of us. LOL So write me with Criticism and help me out. byby Please send your thoughts and ideas for the story to me!! DC