Date: Sun, 17 Dec 2000 19:49:47 -0500 From: musicfan Subject: Where Do We Go #2 Thanks David for putting the story up. Already had requests for the rest. I didn't want to inundate you with too much at once. But I'll send the next couple of chapters onwards. Disclaimer: The following story is the second installment in an on going series about Stephen Gately from Boyzone and what I imagine to be the story behind the beginning of his relationship with Eloy de Jong from Caught in the Act. I have no contact with either person, nor know any of the members of either group. That being said, please read on... "Thanks. It really means a lot to hear you say that. Lord knows you've heard me complain enough now and again. But sometimes I wish I had just left it last year when I moved out the first time, and that I didn't give into his pleading. It just seemed to make matters worse, instead of better." Eloy sighed and Stephen nodded in agreement. The silence stretched on for a moment as each of them got lost in their own thoughts, but it was one of those comfortable silences where neither one felt like they had to say anything at all. For Stephen, it was like sitting in the same room as his friend and he waited with his eyes closed. Out in the hall he could hear running and the giggles of a child. A tiny smile crept onto Stephen's face as he listened to the musical sounds of the little boy pleading to be allowed to stay up just a few more moments. "Hey E?" He asked softly, not really wanting to disturb Eloy's thoughts. "Ja?" "What are you doing in say... a week from now?" Stephen asked as he sat up and pulled the pillows out from under the covers and propped himself up against the headboard. "A week? I don't know... things are slow with the band as the record company can't make up their minds what the hell they want to do with this latest album. I don't know... probably doing what I'm doing right now. Any particular reason why you ask?" Eloy said, his voice reflecting how tired he was now that they had talked and he had been able to release some of the tension he had at telling his friend the news. "Yeah, maybe. We just got into town and are playing Wembley the next 4 nights, but after that I've got three days off. Thought maybe you'd like to get out of Amsterdam and either come to London or I could meet you someplace in between." As Stephen voiced the idea, he grew excited at the thought of getting away for a bit. This had been a breakneck pace, as all of their tours usually were. But this time Stephen was finding that he wasn't bouncing back as fast as he had in the past in terms of keeping upbeat while on tour. He'd always had the reputation of being the one who was always bouncy and happy. For most of this tour he really hadn't felt bouncy at all. It wasn't anything he could put his finger on, but a general unrest that he couldn't seem to get settled for any length of time. It had really been bothering him since he felt that he was in some way letting both the other guys and the fans down by not being what they expected him to be. "E? You still there?" "Ja, I'm here. Thinking.... You know, that's the best damn suggestion I've heard in a long time, Stephen. And I think that you're right. I need to get out of town, to clear my thoughts of all this baggage if nothing else. Only question is where." "Actually, anyplace other than London, now that I think of it," Stephen said, chewing his bottom lip thoughtfully as he rested his elbow on his knee and stared off into space. "But I'm fair game for anything else." "Fair game, are you? Well then, I have just the thing. Up for a mystery?" Eloy asked and Stephen smiled at the sound of mischief in his friend's voice. Something felt really right about his spur of the moment suggestion and he knew instinctively that this was the best thing he could have done for his friend. Having an adventure would be part of the fun, and he knew Eloy's penchant for mischief at times. "A mystery, hmmmm? Why do I find that a scary prospect?" Stephen laughed. "What the heck? Why not! What'd you come up with?" "Well, if wouldn't be a mystery, would it, if I told you. Right? What's your first day off? The gig starts tomorrow night? That would make Friday your first day off, right?" Eloy was speaking faster now, not letting Stephen even answer any of his questions as his idea gelled. "Think you could meet me Friday in Paris?" Stephen thought about it for a moment, trying to figure out where Eloy might be thinking of. "Yeah, that's right. Friday is my day off. Don't have to be back until Monday if I plan it right, and I can fly right into Edinburgh that afternoon. Would that be enough time for what you're thinking? "Ja, that's plenty of time. Want to make plans on your end for the trip or would you like for me to look into it?" Eloy asked, as excited at the prospect of a few days away as Stephen was. "No, let me ask around and see what I can come up with on this end. I'll give you a call back once I get my plans firmed up. How's that sound?" "Great. Ah Stephen, you're the best. I'm so glad I picked up the phone.... I almost didn't, because I didn't want to burden you with my troubles." "Eloy," Stephen said a bit sternly, all amusement from the past few moments leaving him. "You are never a burden, all right? What are friends for, but to lend an ear and a shoulder when you need it? That's what I'm here for and I'm glad I was here for you. And listen, if I ever find you not calling me because you think something like that, you know what I'd do? I'd... I'd..." Stephen stammered, trying to come up with something suitable. "You'd....." Eloy lead him on, a teasing note in his voice. "I'd...." Stephen growled menacingly. "Ah, I don't know what I'd do! But I'd do it. Whatever it is!" They both dissolved into laughter at Stephen's lame threat. "Boy, that should scare you!" "Oh, it does! It does! Can you hear me trembling here?" Eloy laughed, all seriousness gone now. Stephen delighted in making him laugh. Especially where he had been so down such a short while ago. "Damn, Stephen, but I got to go. My mom's going to be over any minute. I've kept you too long and I know how you're probably dying to take a shower." "Well, not that bad off!" Stephen protested with a laugh, but admitted to himself that it would be nice to go in and soak for a bit. "Lord knows I had enough of it out in the rain on the way in!" "Got that downpour they were predicting, huh? Well listen, you go relax and get yourself unpacked. If you just got in, I didn't give you any time to do any of that. Give me a call once you know what your plans are and I'll arrange to meet you at the airport in Paris. Just say the time and I'll be there. Okay?" "Sounds good, E. I'll probably know more some time tomorrow morning, and I'll give you a call then. Anyhow, have a good night and say hi to your mom for me, okay?" "Ja, I'll do that. You take care and rest up for the show. Wouldn't want to disappoint the fans tomorrow because you're too tired, right?" Eloy chuckled and Stephen yawned. Yes, he was pretty tired from the drive down. He really needed to learn to relax and knew he made things worse for himself by being so tense all the times. "Go down and have a drink with the lads. Knowing them, if you're not careful they'll drink the place dry before you get a chance to have a sip!" "Ah, they're not that bad. Not for another couple of weeks when we get to the end of the tour. THEN they start really drinking the place dry!" Stephen said, laughing. They really weren't that bad at all, but sometimes they'd egg each other on with the band members or the crew that were with them for the tour. Stephen remembered a few nights before any of them were of age to drink anywhere, but still getting themselves pissed while touring Ireland in their van when they first started. He closed his eyes and smiled at the thought. Sometimes when he remembered those nights, it seemed like it had happened to someone else, it was so long ago. A lifetime ago. He and Eloy said their goodnights and he hung up, dropping his mobile on the bed. He sat there for a moment, lost in thought. A few minutes later the phone on the nightstand rang, its odd "brinnnng, brinnnng" shrilly enough to knock Stephen out of his thoughts. He stretch stiffly, unaware of the amount of time that had passed while he had been thinking of the past, but his muscles seemed to be telling him it was more than just a few moments. He picked up the phone. "Hello?" "Steo?" Keith's voice shouted over a road of laughter that could be heard along with the tinkle of glasses and chatter nearby. "You coming down anytime soon? I'm fighting off people to save you the best seat in the house!" Stephen grinned affectionately. Keith was his big brother and protector on the road. "Yeah, just had to take a call. I'm going to hop in the shower and I'll be down in a minute. Don't drink the whole bar down, you hear? Leave me something, at least!" "Now would I do that to a friend?" Keith asked, a hurt tone in his voice. "What kind of host would I be if I didn't leave you a wee bit of a nip here? But you better hurry, because the dogs will be circling that last little bit if you don't get down here soon." Stephen laughed and told him he'd be down and hung up the phone. Hopping off the bed, he stripped out of his jeans and tossed them over a chair as he made his way to the bathroom. He had already seen the battered suitcase over in the closet area, so he knew he had something new to change into after his shower. Shucking his briefs as he crossed the threshold, he kicked them out into the room behind him. Starting the water running he looked at himself briefly in the mirror and grimaced. He looked a fright. With a sigh, he stuck his tongue out at the image in the mirror and stepped into the shower. He let the water run over him, the steam rising around him. God, but this felt good! All the tensions of the day melted from him as if washed away by the force of the water coming from the showerhead. He grabbed the soap and showered, then loaded a handful of shampoo on his head. Aware of the time passing, he didn't take as long as he wanted, but quickly rinsed off. Turning off the water, he had to stretch to reach the towel rack and nearly slipped in the tub. Swearing, he grabbed the wall and stopped himself from cracking his head. Great, he thought to himself. That's all I'd need is to end up in the hospital with nothing on! Another Marilyn Monroe, only uglier. His thoughts continued along that vein while he dried off and left the bathroom to go open up the suitcase and see what was the least wrinkled. He really couldn't understand what the fans saw in the pictures they held up to get signed. He looked at them and winced, always seeing something he didn't like. Once a fan tried to explain why she thought he was beautiful. He shook his head in bemusement. Well, his mam always said that beauty was in the eye of the beholder. But for the life of him, he really couldn't agree. He was always yearning for something else... to be taller, to have better muscle definition. To be self confident! With a sigh he reached for the bag that held all of his bathroom stuff and ran a hand over his chin, feeling the stubble that he cropped up since the morning. God, to be blonde like Ro so he didn't have to shave as often! Half the time he felt like a convicted felon when he looked in the mirror later on in the day. Some people had a 5 o'clock shadow, but he always felt like his was more like 1 o'clock --- and that was another thing! Too damn hairy! He mentally continued his list of faults as he threw the bag back on top of his things and decided that for once, he was going to look grubby because he didn't feel like shaving. The hell with it! It was a lost cause! Just toss some clothes on, try to dry his unruly hair in some semblance of order and get down to the bar. ### A half hour later he stepped into the dim bar and followed the sound of laughter to the back of the room. Most of the patrons in the bar were young professionals having a night out on their way home from work, but as he walked past them, they stopped to watch. Stephen resolutely thought of one of the tenets of the book he had been reading earlier in the day and fought the urge to duck down his head and keep his eyes on the floor. Sometimes he could be painfully shy and it was something he had fought for years. One of the worst had been when he went to a school where he was one of the only boys. He had been tongue-tied for weeks! The teachers had despaired of ever getting him to talk and had been constantly on the phone to his mother about it. She couldn't understand what they were saying since usually he'd be a chatterbox once he had gotten home and was in the safety of the kitchen with a cocoa in his hand. Eventually it had gotten better, but he often thought of those times with pain. It was like a wall came up that he couldn't scale, and once again he felt like he was about 5 years old trying to climb the fence his brother had just crawled up on, taunting him to follow. Mark hadn't meant anything by it, he was only teasing, but it was a vivid image that came back to him whenever he felt frustrated by something he didn't have any control over. Walking in public by himself was one of those things. He had tried to explain it to a friend once and couldn't. They had suggested that he pretend he was up on stage since then he had no problems, but he just couldn't make himself do that. By the time he had passed the crowd, hearing faint whispers as one woman leaned toward her friend and passed on a comment, he was almost trembling. It was a relief to see his mates holding reign over the back corner of the room and he waved to everyone as he slipped behind them and into relative anonymity. As promised, there was a stool next to Keith and Stephen climbed onto it, sitting down with a sigh. Mikey nodded from across the table and pushed a pint over to Stephen's side of the table. He smiled in thanks and thankfully took a long pull from the glass. Leaning on the table he looked around, content to let the conversation wash over him. One thing he enjoyed about being on tour and being in the group -- there was no need to be "on" with his friends. He could sit back and enjoy it. He smiled at a joke that Ro told as the others cracked up with laughter. It was times like this when he knew he was doing the right thing with his life. Something felt so right about being with these people. They clicked in such a way that often conversation wasn't even needed. Just a glance, just an expression between any of them could convey so much. He couldn't imagine life anywhere else. The rest of the night passed by quickly, in the company of good friends and a few drinks. After they had closed out the bar, they went to their rooms and crashed for the night. They didn't have to be up until mid-morning, then it was off to a record store for a signing before heading out to Wembley for the show that night. The shows that week were great. Stephen felt a renewed sense of energy at the idea of having a bit of a break and had already arranged with the tour people to get a flight out on Friday morning. Every night the boyz all goofed off, their antics inciting the crowd to even more cheers in between songs. He had to admit a certain amount of curiosity as to what his friend planned, and the anticipation of the surprise he had coming built until he felt like a little just before Christmas morning. By Thursday night he was all but bouncing off the walls and the rest of the lads noticed it. "Sheesh, Stephen, you'd think you were sick of us, so eager to get away you are," Keith grumbled as they got ready in the dressing room. Stephen just smiled and shrugged it off, eager for the show to begin. He went around backstage giving hugs to everyone he saw and leaving them all with silly grins on their faces in response to his enthusiasm. The concert that night was one of the best they'd had in a long time. Sometimes everything went off just perfectly. This was one of those nights. The crowd was at a peak, they danced along to every number, doing the hand movements to each of the songs. No one forgot the words to any of the songs, and the band had set the right mood from the beginning. It was with a sense of triumph that they ran off the stage after the last encore and back into their dressing room. "Wooooooooooooooooooooooooo!" Ro shouted, jumping to slap his hands on the doorframe as he ran in. "Was that not absolutely fantastic?" Everyone nodded and Keith and Shane gave each other high fives as they came in too, shedding clothes onto the floor and grabbing their robes. Mikey was out in the hall in a deep discussion with one of the guitarists, talking about one of the later numbers they had done. Quickly they were escorted out of the stadium. As they walked through the crowd of well wishers and backstage groupies, they could feel the vibrations of the crowd stomping their feet and asking for more. What a night! Stephen thought to himself as he smiled and waved to people on their way through the security. This was the kind of thing he lived for. The sound of the crowd shaking the house down. He couldn't get enough of it, in fact. The security was quick to get them out into the bus and on the road before the fans could clog the road. They went back to their hotel to crash and everyone had plans for their weekend off. By this point in the tour they usually went their separate ways to get some space for a day or so. Keith and Mikey were headed home to see their kids, Shane was off on some adventure with a couple of friends and Ro was off to meet up with his girl. He wasn't saying where, but then he was trying to keep the whole thing secret. So far the press hadn't gotten a whiff of the story, but once they did, he and Eve wouldn't have a moments peace. Ro kept on asking the other guys what they thought of her and whether he should take the plunge and marry her. Stephen didn't think he would just now, but perhaps sometime in the future, maybe. He thought back to earlier in the week when Ro had been asking advice. Ro was waffling back and forth over what to do, with Keith giving his advice. At one point Ronan had turned to Stephen and asked him. "Steo, what would you do?" Stephen had looked at him solemnly and had told him "Ro, if it were me, and I thought I cared that much for someone, I'd let nothing stop me." Ro had just looked at him a moment and nodded thoughtfully. Of course Keith broke the moment by saying something snarky and it had gone on from there. But Stephen really envied each of the lads their chances at having a relationship with someone special. Sometimes he got wistful, wondering when he'd meet the right person. He knew they were out there, somewhere. It was just a matter of when. They reached the hotel and stopped to smile for fans who had beat them back from the gig. They were dead tired now that the run of shows was over and none of them bothered to hang out in the bar that night. Everyone had their thoughts focused on getting away until they had to be back for the shows in Edinburgh. That night, Stephen dropped into his bed and fell asleep straight away. He hadn't thought he would, with the excitement of his adventure coming up the next day, but he hadn't counted on being so tired after the show. It was a chore to actually get up in the morning and Ben had to call to wake him up in time to get his flight. He felt the flutter of anticipation as they went to the airport and he got on his flight to Paris. He had no clue what Eloy had planned, and was really looking forward to getting together again. It had to have been at least 6 or 8 months since the last time they had seen each other. It was one of the problems with their constant touring and promotion. Months would go by before you realized how much you had missed. He had friends who would complain about it, but usually they weren't in the business. With someone like Eloy who knew what it was like, so much didn't have to get explained. Often when they met up again, it was like they had never been apart. They just picked up from where they left off and it was something that Stephen cherished, since it made things so much easier in terms of effort. He never had to apologise for having to break plans at the spur of the moment when he had to. But he was glad that this time he hadn't had to, because he really needed this break. His flight left on time and came into Paris a short time later. It was a short hop from London and Stephen had the row to himself. As always, he was the darling of all the flight attendants and they all made a point of coming and saying hi to him. He only had an overnight bag with him, so it was easy to grab out of the overhead compartment and take with him. Passing through customs, he exited into the main hall of the airport and looked around. One good thing about having a friend like Eloy, who at 1.98 meters tall wasn't hard to miss. With another glance around the crowd, he finally saw him leaning against a post off to the edge and he started to head towards him. Eloy pushed off from the wall and sauntered in Stephen's direction, a big grin on his face. What a great suggestion this had been! He was so glad that Stephen had made it, because he had been looking forward to this with anticipation since the week before. "Hey there, how was the flight?" He asked as he reached down and pulled Stephen's overnight bag away and slung it over his shoulder. "Not bad. Good. Hey, its great to see you, E." Stephen looked up at his friend and smiled. It WAS good to see him. He only hoped that the weekend didn't go by so fast that he missed it all in the rush. Sometimes time had a way of doing that to him, and he wanted to enjoy himself this time. Take it slow and easy and relax. Though there was this little itch in him that couldn't relax as he wondered what Eloy had up his sleeve. He followed as Eloy indicated the way out the door to the parking lot and to the rental car parked there. Eloy opened the trunk and tossed the bag in with his own and then opened the door for Stephen. Stephen smiled in thanks and started to get in, but stopped at Eloy's soft "Hey." He looked up, a little blinded by the sun reflected off the airport terminal behind Eloy. "Yeah?" "Just wanted to say hi, " Eloy said and gave him a quick hug before stepping back. "Well hi right back atcha!" Stephen said with a grin and squeezed Eloy's arm as he got into the car. "Now get and show me this mystery. You don't know how its been killing me, wondering what you had in mind!" Eloy laughed and closed the car door and quickly walked around to the driver side and got in, folding his long length into the driving compartment. It was a tiny sports car, barely long enough to squeeze him in and drive. Stephen shook his head and grinned. Boys and their toys. Eloy was another of those ones who liked cars. Stephen couldn't fathom it. They didn't do a thing for him, but the rest of the lads were mad over them. "So, are you going to leave me in suspense?" "Yup," Eloy said with a grin and pulled his shades off the dash and onto his face. Stephen gave a sigh of frustration at not even getting a hint and pouted, which made Eloy laugh. "Didn't your mother ever tell you that patience is a virtue?" He asked, starting the car and shifting the gears into reverse. He pulled some cash off the top of the driver's side visor and paid the parking lot cashier. Glancing past Stephen, he pulled the car into traffic and got on the highway. "Yeah, me mam said a lot of things I never really wanted to pay attention to!" Stephen said with a laugh and sat back in his seat, forcing himself to be patient since clearly Eloy wasn't going to be of much help. Stephen wasn't really paying attention to the signs, since he couldn't read French anyway. He was always amazed at his friend's multi language ability. Sometimes he felt he barely got by with just one! And the Gaelic that the schools in Dublin tried to teach the kids was something of a dead language to him and he never bothered to learn more than the swear words heard out back behind the building. Definitely not something that he could have gotten a good grade on! So he contented himself with watching the driver, trying to get a hint of what Eloy had planned for them. Stephen noticed that his hair was a little bit longer than the last time they'd seen each other. One longish brown lock kept on getting in his way and he'd occasionally rake his hand back over his head. With the sunglasses on, Stephen really couldn't see his eyes, but then, Eloy needed to concentrate on the road, so he wasn't looking around anyhow. With a quick glance to the side, Eloy shifted gears and hit the gas. They flew down the highway and out of the city proper. "Any ideas yet?" He asked and reached for the pack of cigarettes on the dashboard beween them. "E, would you mind?" Stephen asked, putting his hand in the way of Eloy's questing fingers and covering the box. "I hate that stuff, remember?" "Oh, sorry. I know it's a bad habit, but really, I don't even think about it, most of the time" Eloy said, and patted Stephen's hand affectionately, giving it a slight squeeze before putting his hand back on the wheel. "Then don't think about it right now, and you won't miss it, hmmm?" Stephen said, pushing the box down in between the seats. He really hated the smell of the stuff, but Eloy had grown up in an area where everyone had smoked and had picked up the habit. Occasionally he had mentioned he should really quit, if only so it wouldn't affect his singing, but he never really made the effort. Stephen reached up and turned the radio on, searching for a decent station. They listened in companionable silence as they drove along the stretch of highway. Eventually Eloy signalled for the exit and they got off onto a country road. It was beautiful winery country, and they passed rows of grapevines for a long time as they went up and down gently rolling hills. Stephen grew more curious since they seemed to be heading out in the middle of nowhere. He really didn't have a clue what Eloy had planned. Then they reached a stretch of road that was more developed and Eloy turned down that. A few moments later the answer became rather obvious and Eloy looked over to see the most incredible smile on Stephen's face. "Well?" he asked, waiting for a response. If anything, Stephen's grin grew larger. "Oh, you're a genius! This is perfect, Eloy... just perfect." Stephen looked over at Eloy and continued grinning. "Have I mentioned lately that I love you? Eloy threw back his head and laughed. It was a delicious sound and quite infectious, so Stephen joined in as they drove through the gates of Euro Disney and Eloy pulled up to the hotel.