Date: Sat, 19 Nov 2005 18:38:16 -0500 From: S Subject: Tug of War I His heart pounding like a bass drum, Logan dashed up the stairs and rapped on the door. Who, his head howled, was the prick in Audrey's apartment? He paced briskly to the balustrade, sniffed violently at the black pickup, and returned to the white panel door. "I'm gonna pound this dork!" Logan said, rattling the doorknob. The door caved back, allowing the blanket of moonlight to light the foyer's stone floor. "I've been calling you all afternoon!" Logan boomed out. "I told you that I would be dating more than one guy," Audrey said in a thin, reedy voice. "You agreed to those terms." "Only `cause you forced me to!" Soft as a delicate brush, Audrey's light-brown hair rested over her pared shoulders. Its scent of strawberry shampoo tickled Logan's nostrils like a feather. "Who's the weasel in the apartment?" Logan said, shoving the door the rest of the way. "Stop this, right now!" Had the guy been a stranger, Logan wouldn't have felt as betrayed. But of all people, his rival had to be his shop partner from Automotive Technology class, the dude that Logan had informally tutored since summer semester began. Like a bull, Logan swaggered toward the long-haired blond. "So this is the thanks I get for helping you in class." "I didn't ask for your help--you volunteered!" Jake said, pointing accusingly as he ankled to his feet. "You're one deluded egomaniac." "Unlike you, who like showing off your big, bad muscles and boy-cute looks at your uncle's garage--to the delight of every other chick on campus." Logan froze like a cat in mid-hunt. "You little piece of shit," he spat, going for Jake's jugular. "Smack it off!" Audrey said, stepping in front of Logan and grabbing his arms as if catching a frisbee. "I'm gonna punch you!" Logan snarled at Jake. He squeezed two steps toward the guy. Jake, however, remained standing by the loveseat of tiger-print cushions and oak-wood armrests. Twenty odd feet into the loft, he continued to sparkle in the lamp-lit surroundings, just like the strips of the bamboo floor. "I swear I'll dump you for Jake if you don't quit this instant," Audrey said. As if snapping out of hypnosis, Logan stopped his body with a jolt. "That's better," Audrey said. She lowered Logan's forearms with the finesse of a ballerina and smoothed the sleeves of his light-green polo. "Both of you--in the kitchen." * * * * As the white fluorescent light switched on, Audrey erected her arms horizontally into a V, pointing toward two widely separated stools. Sucking his teeth, Jake climbed onto the stave-backed seat by the foyer. "Tonight's my turn to date you--not his! Can't you talk to him some other time?" Audrey stopped abruptly behind the upturned/reverse-L white counter. Startled, her eyes lifted toward Jake like a curtain rising to a breeze. "Believe me. I would rather have us be beyond this stage." "What are you getting at?" Jake said, fixing into place the circle-framed, black sunglasses that rested on his forehead. Audrey began to pace around the chopping table of stainless steel. "Increasing numbers of guys are dating the same girl and making no fuss about it." "You mean, those neo-hippie, wannabe-yuppie college guys we're hearing about in the news?" Audrey stopped strolling, and sappiness welled up in her blue, liquid eyes. "Those collegians are paving the way to a different future," she said sentimentally. "The kind of future where every guy's a fag?" Jake said sarcastically. Such disregard for a girl, Logan rumbled in his mind. What could a rich, Ivy League girl possibly see in a trash-talking stoner who--twice--had almost dropped out of community college? Not that Logan disagreed with Jake. But Jake's behavior was inexcusable, especially since Audrey seemed on the verge of tears. "You will shut your face, or I'm gonna break it," Logan said, stepping down from his stool. "Yeah?" Jake said, matching Logan's moves. "Let's go." "Quit it!" Audrey screamed, quaking in place. "Or I'll dump you both--right here!" Like a couple of high school students at detention, Jake and Logan returned to their seats. Silence fell on the kitchen like a diaphanous veil, and the indented lights' low hum on top of Audrey filled the vacuum of stillness. "Guys like you are becoming dinosaurs," Audrey half-whispered, breaking the quiet like a pebble a crystalline lake. "Alternative sexual experimentation among straight college men began in 2017, and sociologists predict that by the 2020s, as much as 20% of the population may identify as bisexual." Something about those words plucked a string inside Logan. Although his eyes were fixed on the counter, he sensed Jake experiencing the same--whatever it was. Such vulnerability and seriousness in Jake--a dude that goofed his way through life--ignited a strange feeling inside Logan. "My ex-boyfriend didn't understand the neo-hippie philosophy," Audrey resumed, her blurry arms akimbo. "He also was as insensitive as you two. But, at least, he was civilized about things." "Knowing we're not Ivy League material, why did you get involved with us?" Logan said, heaving his eyes in a scowl. Jake's eyebrows arched up in surprise, as Logan had never spoken so academically in class. "I wanted to experience something different," Audrey said, "... raw, callous guys with an average--or, in your case, below average--upbringing." "Why?" Logan said. "All my life, I have dated guys like Ethan. My parents loved his type. But as I've matured, I have discovered that those guys are too restrained. They're too worried about their money and reputation." Her angelic eyes waxed pensive. Jake puffed as if smoking marijuana. "Babe," he said, making false starts with his head. "It's not normal for guys to share girls with each other." "You call me babe again, and I'll force you to do something you might regret," Audrey said, crossing the 90 degrees between Logan's end of the counter and Jake's. She leaned her upper body toward Jake. "Maybe I ought to get mean with you." "Oooh! I like the sound of that," Jake said, smiling wickedly. "You wouldn't if I told you what I have in mind." Jake flicked his tongue across his upper lip. Such wanton disrespect for me, Logan grated. Something had to be done immediately! "Move your turkey face away from her," Logan said, hopping off his stool. "She's my girlfriend, doofus," Jake said, his knuckles a hairbreadth from hers. Audrey dragged her arms off the counter. "Back in your seat," she said, pointing peevishly. Sighing fretfully, Logan merely returned to his area. Audrey turned to Jake. "And you--be quiet." "What?" Jake said incredulously. Audrey began to pace around the checkered, black-and-white tiles. "You bozos have a simple choice. Either you resolve your mutual hostility among yourselves, or you can kiss goodbye to your hope of sleeping with me." She stopped in front of the stainless-steel refrigerator. "You can't be serious," Jake said. "You weasels agreed to let me date both of you." "Only `cause you forced us to!" Jake wailed like a kid protesting a bad grade. "You made a free choice. Now, you have to live with the consequences of your decision." "How do you suggest we work out our differences?" Logan said, his wrath ready to explode. "Obviously, you won't talk it out," Audrey said, her annoyance dissipating as if under some inner command. Looking at the floor, she resumed pacing. "I think you both need to blow off some steam. I think I know the perfect place where you can do that." "Where?" Logan almost barked. A subtle grin materialized across her oval, peach-colored face. * * * * Descending the spiral staircase, Logan felt his heart scrambling like an eggbeater, for he remembered Audrey's telling him that she hosted aerobics classes in her townhouse. Although he had never seen the ground floor, Logan knew what Audrey had in mind. Of course, he didn't understand how a girl who wanted to keep two guys would want to unleash them against each other. Alas! The intricacies of female logic. The glass double doors parted like a transparent elevator, and white fluorescent light flooded the mini-gymnasium. "First, you will not harm each other," Audrey said, gliding like a ghost into the aerobics room. "If I catch either of you punching, kicking, or strangling the other, I'll stop dating whoever of you does that. If both of you are guilty, then you might as well date each other because I won't have anything to do with you." Halting, she cast each of them a side-glance that bordered between girlishness and classiness. "Is that clear?" "Clear as your eyes," Jake said, standing by her right arm. Logan nodded grumpily from her other side. Audrey took three dainty steps and turned. "Second, you are to freestyle wrestle, given that God knows you sophomores have acquired enough horseplay experience since elementary school." Jake showed his ivory-colored teeth as he grinned like a hyena. "This ought to get interesting." "Shut up, rat face!" Audrey continued, "Third, the winner gets to spend the night with me, and the loser does not." "All right!" Jake cheered. "Yeah, for me--the winner!" Logan countered. Giving them her silk-covered back, Audrey resumed stepping toward the middle of the room. "You will struggle on this mat." Side by side, Jake and Logan tagged along. "How long do you want us to wrestle?" Logan said. Turning, Audrey scratched her head. "Until one of you pins the other down for 10 seconds. Whoever of you does that is the winner." "Come on," Jake said. "You gotta raise the stakes a little." "What do you mean?" Audrey hummed, fixing a shoulder strap of her white blouse. "I was thinking along the lines of making the loser do something real embarassing." "You were actually thinking?" Logan chimed in. "Yeah," Jake said, serious as a whistle. "Something embarrassing like--" His hazel eyes lit up like a couple of Christmas tree lights. "How about the loser having to suck the winner's dick for a whole minute?" Audrey's eyes showed mild amusement. "I wasn't thinking along those lines." "If you're gonna propose that we fight like dogs, you gotta make things a little down `n dirty," Jake said, his voice fresh to the last. "I agree," Logan said, his hands resting below his waist. "Jake needs to be taught a lesson. Doing what he proposes is the best way to put him in his place." "You wish." "Guys!" Audrey intoned, her brittle, small feet bare on the waxed wooden floor. Smiling mildly in disbelief, she shook her head. "You guys are really intent on pissing off each other. Is that a turn-on for you?" "The idea of putting this jerk in his place is, believe me, the biggest turn-on a guy could have." "Yeah?" Jake said and pulled off his henley. "Yeah!" Logan echoed louder and peeled off his polo. Jake's toned chest almost mirrored Logan's cross of muscle peaks and valleys, which stretched from Logan's pecs to his abs. Likewise, Jake's height of 5' 9" roughly equaled Logan's, and the cretin's golden hair closely matched Logan's hair color. To be sure, Jake exhibited some differences: his lighter skin, his straight hair cascading to the base of his ribcage, and his thick-lipped eyelids. Nonetheless, Jake's physical similarities enraged Logan in an almost Faustian way. Squatting, Jake unzipped his black running shoes, causing them to wail like a baby. Bending as though about to start a vertical somersault, Logan untied his white basketball sneakers and kicked them off. "Aren't you going to remove your pants?" Audrey said, strolling toward them. Dipping his forehead, Logan tipped his eyes at her and arched his eyebrows. "Don't look at me that way," she said. "If you want to get `down `n dirty,' then you might as well bare yourselves. After all, isn't that how pigs live and die?" Logan glimpsed at Jake's burgundy sweatpants. Compared to Logan's black jeans, Jake's roomy slacks placed the rug rat at a distinct advantage on the mat. Logan, of course, could not allow that. But to initiate and repel wrestling moves with a nearly naked guy seemed too gay for Logan's comfort. "Don't you have shorts for us?" "No," Audrey said, stopping like a boxing referee between Jake and Logan. "You sophomores will fight in your underwear." How her eyes glittered with incitement, probably at the notion of turning the boys' bravado on its head. Fear turned to fright inside Logan. He glanced at the rectangular glass windows that circled the top of the room under its high ceiling. The darkness seeping in from beyond sealed Logan's determination to kick his opponent to kingdom come. "If either of you tell anyone about this, I swear I'll strangle that person," Logan said and undid his jeans. "I'll be in the corner," Audrey said, sloughing her shoulder straps. The sensuality with which she bared her shoulders brought a twitch to Logan's member. "Let's not get too formal about this," Audrey crooned, her voice receding into the distance. "Simply start when you're ready. I'll call stop when the loser's suck minute is up." Logan pushed his jeans down, stepped out of them, and marched to the mat. He turned, lifted each leg, and pulled off his white, cotton socks. Jake tossed his sunglasses aside, duplicated the leg-sock shebang, and sashayed toward him. Like Logan, Jake was sporting white, cotton briefs. This was another resemblance that magnified Logan's sense of competition. The threat had to be exterminated! Logan slipped his cedar beads off his left wrist, dropped them onto the area beyond the blue mat, and planted himself like a linebacker. Jake hurled himself at Logan. Logan shook like the seat of an airplane in mid-collision. He pressed his body against Jake and locked his foot under the cretin's left leg. Jake pulled Logan's trimmed, short hair. Logan yawped! Jake pushed. Logan counterpushed. And Jake . . . lost his balance. At last, Logan had the weasel where he wanted. "One ... two ... three ..." Jake struck with his knee, rolled over Logan, and grabbed Logan's crotch. "What the hell?" "You like that, don't you?" Jake heaved, rubbing his pale hand over Logan's bulging cock. "Get your filthy hands off me!" Logan whooped in a mix of panic and sexual excitement. His adolescent face an inch from Logan's more preppy face, Jake whispered, "Make me." Logan pulled Jake's hair as if removing a spider web--the kind that Jake had tattooed in black on the upper side of his left arm. Jake wailed like a 13-year-old boy! Logan rolled Jake away, mounted the moist dough of Italian bread from the rear, and interlocked his legs with the dork's. Not since his last bar fight had Logan subdued a guy with the same intensity of muscles that he had. Now, the feel of his pecs pressing Jake's back like a warm iron infused his hard-on, and the feel of his cock nestled against Jake's butt crack added fuel to the fire in his loins. Disgust gripped Logan like a mother shaking her unruly kid. What would his uncle--with whom he lived--say if he caught Logan enjoying his pecker as a result of his position? How would Logan answer to him? Jake struggled to move his buttocks from side to side. Such defiance! Logan had to teach Jake a lesson, regardless of the consequences to Logan's straight identity. His fury igniting like hay in a wildfire, Logan pressed his wiener against Jake's rump slit. Jake moaned in disapproval. Logan pressed harder. "We must be at five ... six ... seven ... " Jake groaned louder. "... eight ... nine ... " Jake elbowed him. Logan fell aside. "One," Jake grated, climbing on top of him. Logan struggled underneath. "... two ... three ... four ... " Jake slithered up, sat on Logan's saddle abs, and pinned Logan's arms. Logan winced at the tent pole of Jake's briefs. "I'm gonna get you, asshole!" "... six ... seven ... eight ... " With his knees, Jake enclosed Logan's legs from the outside. "... nine ... ten." Looking triumphantly into Logan, Jake grinned mischievously. The smile was the kind that accompanied school pranks. Logan's stomach turned as if to an addled egg. Jake turned to Logan's left, jerked up his chin at Audrey, and said, "Are you ready to see what straight, neo-hippie, wannabe yuppies do in their dorms?" "God! Am I ready," Audrey fluted orgasmically. Logan twisted his head back. To his shock, Audrey had lowered her strap blouse halfway and had slipped her mini-skirt a third of the way down. Logan kept eyeing her tooth-white, silk panties and her pearl-white, satin brassier. Jake loosened his grip on Logan's biceps and triceps. "Are you ready to lather up my dick for your girlfriend's pussy?" Now, she's my girlfriend? Logan thought. What was Jake trying to do? Piss him off more? Logan straightened his head--something that teachers berated him for not doing in class. "Up yours!" "Yeah?" Jake zigzagged further up, shucked his briefs, and held his dick an inch from Logan's lips. The shaft hovered above the New England hills of Logan's chest, swollen like the belly of a super-jumbo airliner and ready to fly over the pipeline of Logan's nose bridge. Logan could have tackled, punched, and fucked the guy for trying to humiliate him like this in front of the girl of his dreams. That, however, would have cost Logan the chance to be with her in the future--and Audrey was one angel he couldn't afford to lose. Reluctantly, Logan closed his eyes and parted his lips. The wiener entered Logan's mouth like a salmon re-diving into the ocean. Logan tried to breath shallowly. But the smell of pubes and the taste of tuna was too much to shut out. Like it or not, Logan had to accept the unembraceable. Grasping Logan's hair as if it were spaghetti, Jake pulled his dick out and rammed it back inside. Logan scrunched his face in pain. "This ought to put you in your place," Jake said venomously. He sank his cock deeper, drilling through ice. Logan's tongue licked the leather-skinned invader. Quickly, Logan reasoned that the monster shaft was inescapable in a limited mouth. "Holy moly," Jake said, nothing escaping him. As if fucking a girl, he thrusted with the rhythm of advancing and retreating surf foam. The mat emitted the crunching sounds of a thick trash bag, and the tongue-cock interaction in Logan's mouth dispersed the sound of a puppy lapping water from a bowl. Who, Logan thought, would have imagined that his mouth would become a fuck hole? He flicked the approaching meat. "Alright," Jake heaved enthusiastically, pulling Logan's hair. Logan's eyes flung open! What the hell are you clawing my hair for? his navy blues slung at Jake. Jake's dark marbles stared back at Logan--with boldness, horniness, and vulgarity rolled into them. Logan shut his eyes, and the tip of his tongue scraped Jake's piss slit. "Fuckin' A," Jake said, his fingers towel-wrenching the forward- flowing rapids of Logan's hair. Not only was Logan--campus jock and part-time mechanic--starting to enjoy cock. Jake's dirty talk was giving Logan psychological pleasure, as well. This simply didn't compute with Logan's heterosexual libido and with his tough-guy image. The incongruity confused him. The cockhead's warm, musky taste, however, sharpened Logan's hunger. Upon the overgrown thumb's reentry into his mouth, Logan licked the piss slit again. Jake pulled out of Logan's mouth. What? Logan bawled, his eyes parting faster than lightning. "That's all folks," Jake said, releasing Logan's hair and dismounting him. But the minute isn't up! Logan brayed, peeved by this sudden departure from the rules. Kneeling on the mat, Jake leaned over to Logan. "My bleeding heart has taken mercy on you," Jake whispered in his ear. The tickle of Jake's hair strands on Logan's chest confirmed Logan's suspicion that Jake was teasing him. "You must be joking." Jake sat back and pushed himself off his heels. "Be grateful; count your blessings; and get out of here." II What the hell had happened last Tuesday? How, Logan wondered, had a simple visit to his girlfriend's turned into a gay-leaning escapade? More important, how could a straight guy like him have found himself falling for gay stuff? Logan passed his hand through his khaki-blond hair. Why, he agonized, had Jake pulled out early from his mouth? To tease him? To impress Audrey? To show mercy? Fellowship? "Dude, my man!" Logan turned right. Jake slapped his arm onto Logan's shoulder. "Are you following me?" Logan said defensively. Jake hopped onto the bar stool, swept his sunglasses off his head, and chucked them onto the counter. "I thought I'd come here for a beer. What brand are you having?" Stupefied, Logan looked at his half-empty glass. "Cooler's Brew," he muttered. "Excellent," Jake said. He pointed at Logan's glass for the bartender and skimmed the sun-streaked surroundings. "Summer sure is coming early this month." "What is that supposed to mean?" Logan said, contorting his face with petulance. "Look around you." For early afternoon, the pub had more people than usual. Still, it was Thursday, Logan reasoned, and the heat of summer had little to do with the number of people around him. Jake sipped from his dewy glass. "Listen," he said, refreshed by the ice-cold beverage. "I hope you're not mad at me." "Not mad at you?" Logan grated, ready to slug him. "You fucking grab my dick in the middle of a wrestling match--unannounced! You pull my hair. You break the rules. Then, you sleep with my girlfriend." "I did pull out of your mouth early." "Why did you do that?" Logan said, not giving a damn about the guy who was sitting around the left end of the wooden counter. Jake slurped, then smacked his lips. "I wanted to make a friendship gesture." "Putting your dick in my mouth? Gee! That makes sense." "I figured you might've been uncomfortable, with Audrey watching and all. So I pulled out." "If you truly wanted to make a `friendship gesture,' you would've ended the wrestling match upon the count of ten." Logan sniffed violently at him, deeply inhaling the place's beery smell. "That wasn't so bad," Jake said. "Besides, I noticed how you licked my shaft and head." He grinned in a smart-alecky way. "You liked it. Admit it." "You really are full of shit," Logan said, stepping down from his stool. "You want me to say yes so you can give Audrey the news, get her to dump me for being a faggot, and have her all to yourself. Well, I hate to disappoint you." He finished by shoving him gently. "I'll suck your cock if that'll make you feel better," Jake said casually. "What?" Logan said, lost beyond comprehension. "If we're to date the same girl, we might as well try to get along." Logan's head spun like a spindle. "So you are the white trash that Audrey dumped me for." Logan turned to the voice coming from his left. The young man had trimmed, forward-combed hair, short as the fur of a squirrel and with large curls in front. His glittering, dark eyes exuded pompousness, injury, and egocentrism. Unlike the rest of the patrons, he wore a tie and jacket. "I should have known that your arrangement was what she was looking for," he said, bitterness, rage, and vengefulness in his gentleman's voice. "What could Audrey possibly see in queer vermin like you?" "Watch your mouth!" Logan said, stepping toward him. "Or else?" Audrey's ex-boyfriend nearly fell as he stepped down from his stool. "Don't let him press your buttons," Jake said, holding Logan back. "Yeah, listen to your fairy lover." Logan hawked phlegm meant for Audrey's ex. "Come with me," Jake said, gently turning Logan toward the bar's dim entrance. He dropped some dough on the counter, re-laid his hands on Logan's shoulders, and pushed Logan toward the door. "That's right! Run away!" the guy said in a drunken voice. "Because I'm gonna tell Audrey's parents about you. They have some heavy connections!" III Standing by Jake in front of Audrey's door, Logan felt specks of himself eroding like sand grains blowing off the surface of a beach. Part of him wanted to fight off the morally decadent urges stirring in his heart. Part of him did not. Was Audrey involved with the bisexual liberation movement that was sweeping the country? As for Jake, Logan mused, how could the turnip look so cool regarding what was about to occur? Was Jake secretly bisexual? Was he in on Audrey's plan to lure the guys away from straightness? Jake pressed the round, black button at the top-center of the door. "This is twisted," Logan said, turning away from the entrance. "Yo!" Jake hooted. Why did the sky have to glow with such crystal-clear blueness, unbroken by a single cloud? This was too perfect--especially for early June--and from experience, Logan knew that no good news could follow. By the balustrade, Logan rotated toward Jake. "I don't think I can go through with this." "I'm willing to suck your cock to even the score for you," Jake said with the usual vulgarity in his eyes. "But I'm not gonna do it without a girl present. Now, you either come with me, or you can see Audrey alone tomorrow." Logan leaned backward on the railing. His hair shaking over his back like strings of yarn, Jake turned and re-pressed the doorbell. "Good afternoon, guys," Audrey rippled, opening the panel door of oak wood. Her diaphanous house gown eroded any remaining objections that Logan might have had. When Jake pressed his body against Audrey's for a smooch, Logan glided toward them like a kid chasing candy. Kissing Audrey, Logan tasted her peppermint breath. It, however, was diluted by Jake's leftover taste of saliva. How could Jake have dared to spoil Logan's feeding off her mouth? His eyes growling sideways at Jake, Logan swore to give it to him. * * * * The threesome knelt on the cinnamon sheets, basking in the stripes of sunlight beaming through the Venetian blinds. Surrounded by the skin-of-kiwi color of the walls, the trio breathed the room's scent of wood shavings. The white orchids by the corner, in turn, brought a unique blend to the air. Inch by inch, Audrey peeled off her white gown. Cheek by jowl, Jake and Logan sighed like 13-year-old males seeing a bared female body for the first time. Their hands trembling, they unbuttoned their polos and pulled them off. Audrey slowly removed her white, satin brassier. Her plump, orange-pink breasts drew air from the guys' mouths. Audrey bent forward from the bed's wooden headboard and tugged down Jake's yellow balloon pants of seersucker. Reluctantly, Logan marveled at Jake's white briefs of cotton. On the one hand, they made Logan feel connected to the guy. On the other hand, Jake's sporting of Logan's same hue and style of underwear made Logan feel threatened. Audrey unbuttoned and unzipped Logan's blue jeans, then kneeled back up. Jesus Christ of Nazareth! Logan echoed in his mind. How could nature have placed before him the most awesome tits in the universe? Logan shucked his pants down, exposing his sausage-in-tortilla. Always ahead of the curve, Jake slipped his briefs down. His banana dangle foreboded almost seven inches at full mast. Logan curled his upper lip, for Jake's sizeable endowment and lack of circumcision reflected the qualities of Logan's dick. Logan's competitor had to be subdued--immediately! Logan sloughed his briefs down, revealing his pinkish cock. "So, big shot," he said, turning left. "Aren't you gonna butter my hot dog for penetration?" Jake huffed a laugh. "What kind of question is that?" he said, jerking up his chin at him. "We're buddies, and buddies do things for each other." With that, he scooted around Logan and dropped his round chin toward the hanging rope. Will he really do it? Logan wondered. Jake's plum-cheeked face hung at a mere half-yard away from Logan's face. With his lips relaxed like a hammock, Jake angled his eyeballs up. Uneasy, Logan shifted his eyes down. Like Logan, Jake exhibited muscles rippling softly but clearly across his generally fat-free chest. Jake, however, was a tinge pudgy around the pecs. Moreover, Jake's skin tone put the nitwit at a disadvantage, for compared to Logan's orange-peach chest, Jake's chest was pale-cream. Clearly, Jake had to be the guy to give head. Logan whipped his dark-blue eyes up toward Jake. Jake winked at Logan. Logan lifted his chest of chiseled marble, bringing his hands to rest below his waist like a bully blocking the road. Like the branch of a candelabra cactus, Jake's curved wiener kept growing toward the sunlight. Logan's frankfurter started pointing toward the ceiling fan. His bare butt facing Audrey, Jake stooped toward Logan and flicked the frenulum of Logan's uncut cock. A tuft of air escaped Logan's lungs. Jake licked the shaft, sucked the head, and flicked the sides. Tiny bubbles sizzled inside Logan's nuts. His hands slithering up Logan's hip abductors, Jake circled his pink tongue around the foreskin. "Holy mackerel!" Logan shot into the ceiling. Jake swallowed the wiener--all six and half inches--and sucked with the sprightliness of a Dachshund. How in the world could a straight dude suck so well? The question pummeled Logan's stomach. Pissed by this, Logan snatched Jake's hair where it dangled like the strings of a harp. Jake strummed his vocal chords approvingly under his breath. The synthesizer vibrations zipped from Jake's o-wrapped lips to the base of Logan's cock, from there to the dick's tip, and down to Logan's pubes, bladder, and pubic bone. Logan hissed as if Jake had applied disinfectant on him. "Fuckin' hussy!" Jake slapped Logan's butt for that. Reaching forward, Logan smacked Jake's rump harder. "You like this kinky stuff, don't you?" Jake mmm-hmmed a sustained C and G note in brass, moving his head to and fro. "Yeah? Then, take my wiener!" Logan humped into Jake as if slugging a punching bag with his member. His hips bucked so hard that he nearly flip-knocked the cockhound onto his back. Jake hummed with the pitch of a piccolo. Logan pulled out and drove his spear back into Jake. Logan didn't look at Audrey lest her angelic purity might instill guilt in him about his ignoring the female gender. Jake, however, clasped his lips onto the penis and tongue-scrubbed the dick inside his geyser-warm mouth. "Fuckin' horndog!" Logan said, throwing his head back. Making the sound of a guy cracking his knuckles, Jake started to rub himself in circles. Such loss of control! Like so many college men of their generation, Jake and Logan were messing with nature by misusing their God-given cocks. How could America not expect divine retribution for allowing itself to cave into the temptations of the bisexual movement? Pensive with this question, Logan guiltily scraped his eyes over Audrey's orbs, almost asking her forgiveness for his behavior. Logan awoke to the ham-like feel of Jake's tongue on his balls. "Fuckin' A!" Logan wailed. He brusquely twisted his torso toward the panel window. Jake took one, then the other nut into his mouth. "Unfucking believable!" Logan heaved, pulling Jake's hair as though it were a ragged doll. A sardine couldn't have been slicker than Jake's tongue. No way this guy hadn't sucked nut before. Jake slurped as if devouring kenepas. "Holy shit!" Logan said, his pubes as excited as the leafy woods outside his left. Jake spit noisily onto his hand, retook the macadamias into his mouth, and seized Logan's thick cucumber. Logan looked down in shock. A girl would've never done that, he mused. The thought incited him in a scrumptiously delicious way, as Jake's act proved that Logan's pig appetite was shared by another pig. Never again would Jake and Logan go hungry for sex whenever a girl was not "in the mood." That same thought terrified Logan, but he let himself bask in his discovery. Jake's slippery hands began to mold Logan's cock as though it were clay spinning on a potter's wheel. "Oh, man," Logan said, for a moment not caring that Jake was about to churn out his seed. Jake kept pumping Logan's foreskin as if it were an iridescent spiral-spring, the kind that Logan played with as a child. "Hey!" Logan shot, snatching Jake's hand. "You're not gonna jerk me off! I'm gonna cum in her today--not in the air--and you better get your mouth ready for the future." Thank heavens that Logan had come to his senses. What, Logan yowled, had he been thinking? "To think I was about to let you have Audrey all to yourself--again!" Shaking his head like a wagging foxtail, Jake squinted sarcastically at Logan. Audrey spoke softly. "I told you chimps that fellatio wasn't a good idea. But last Tuesday, Jake had to insist that `the loser suck the winner's dick.' When that happens between straight guys, you can rest assured that the loser won't stay down for long." Shyly, Logan raised his eyes. To his relief, Audrey was staring at Jake. "Now that you're even, however, you might want to intensify that equality." "Come again?" Jake said, quickly kneeling up and scooting toward his original position. Audrey's orbs of pearl shifted toward Logan. "You dodos have no problem wrestling each other in briefs," she said. "You have no problem forcing each other's members down the other's throat. You have no problem talking dirty to each other. Therefore, you shouldn't have any problem, say, kissing." "No way," Jake said, stressing things with his hands. "If you want our relationship to work, then you have to get comfortable with each other," Audrey pressed. "Our relationship?" Jake said, flabbergasted by Audrey's twisting of words. "We don't have a `relationship' with each other. Only with you." "But you do," Audrey crooned. "Your relationship is one of enemies--or, in your case, jerks--trying to prove who's more macho than the other." She paused, her thin lips of honey as moist as the rest of her body. "You're each heavily invested in what the other thinks. I merely suggest that you change those emotions into something ... utterly ... positive." She abruptly rubbed her fingers over her panties and stopped. "Lord have mercy," Jake said. His dragon-fire exhale extinguished in the air space between him and her. "Are you up to the challenge?" Audrey whispered seductively, lingering her butter fingers over her crotch. Logan turned left. Jake's eyeballs met Logan's. Never had Jake's pupils been so dilated, and never had the yellow furry comb around his iris glowed with such intensity. Although coated with their usual horniness, smartness, and vulgarity, Jake's orbs exuded a third-rail mixture of suaveness and desperation. We gotta do this if we wanna excite her, Jake said, breaking the ice. I know, Logan grumbled. I just wish Audrey would be content with our cock sucking. That sure would make our lives simpler, Jake said, his dark marbles nodding in agreement. I wish I could tell you otherwise, but her intentions are crystal clear. If we want pussy, we better comply. Kissing won't make us gay, will it? Bi-curious maybe, but not gay. Jake and Logan faced each other the rest of the way. Like docking space capsules, they inched closer ... and closer ... and closer. At last, they brought their lips together. The electricity ripped them apart! But like bi-planes diving to earth after pulling out of enemy fire, Jake and Logan descended back onto their mouths. Jake's face smelled of soaped scallions; his lips tasted of unsalted hot dogs; and his cock felt like the tail of a dingo. The combination drove Logan insane with lust. He wanted to sniff more, to taste more, and to touch more. Yet, he couldn't get enough. Paradoxically, Logan's senses sharpened faster than quicksand, and at one point, he thought that he smelled the metal of Jake's nose ring. Sucking like horny teenagers, Jake and Logan reached their arms around their waists and grabbed each other's buttocks. What had possessed them? The words reeled in Logan's head like butterflies lost in blustering winds. Jake hummed in excruciating pain, his face scrunched up like crumpled paper. Logan let his eyelids drop halfway. Never had he felt so close to another male. As far as Logan knew, Jake was feeling the same thing, thinking the same thoughts, and no longer caring about the shattering of his straight identity. All that mattered was getting the girl's pussy wet. Jake and Logan's heterosexual agenda, however, had not only let the queer genie out of the bottle. The dudes' close-up view had made each of them larger than life: Jake's heart-shaped face distorting into a giant peach, his picaresque eyes looming like billiard balls twisted awry in a convex mirror, and his nose ring looking like a huge ball bearing. Logan's diamond-shaped face must have impressed Jake as much. Instinctively, Logan knew that their magnified perspective would leave a long-lasting impression on them. It was just too intense not too--like kissing a girl for the first time. Moreover, Jake must have been further ahead on this road of same-sex exploration, as unlike Logan at the gym, Jake had eyed Logan's genitals while sucking him. What was that sight like for Jake? Part of Logan swore to even the score in this area. If only the fellows had known that their heterosexuality would unleash their sophomoric urges away from the world's pack mentality. Jake slapped Logan and drew him closer. Opening his half-shut eyes, Logan cuffed him back--and felt the sting on Jake's rump. "Umph!" Jake snorted up his nose, sucking wildly. Logan's appetite for palm pain sharpened like an ax, and he slapped Jake again. Jake smacked Logan's other muscle ball. Was this what gay foreplay was all about? Logan wondered. The smarting pain on Logan's buttocks boosted his hard-on, and the feel of the wieners dueling in trapped body heat incited Logan even more. The cocks poked the guys' quadriceps, sandpapered the dudes' pubes, and rubbed past each other like pastry sticks. "Humph!" Logan squealed from the throat, nibbling Jake's lower lip. This was too much! Jake and Logan stroked each other's lips as if dipping clothes in and out of a washtub. Their dog pants steamed up their supple faces and heated up their lukewarm lips. Logan allowed himself to relish partnering with Jake in this fashion. Something about unleashing lust with a straight dude in a manner unbecoming of hetero buddies excited Logan in wickedly thrilling ways. What would his dead mother say if she caught Logan like this? Jake kneaded Logan's back muscles as if they were pizza dough. Logan returned the favor. Never did the sophomores stop smooching! Rather, they twisted their heads, flicked their tongues, and distorted their noses. The more they French-kissed, the more they wanted to lock their lips. "All right," Audrey heaved, audibly pleased. Jake and Logan unpasted and ahed as if finishing a cold, refreshing drink. "Now," Audrey continued. "Remove your knee-crunched pants and briefs the rest of the way." "You remove your panties first," Jake said. "Better still, let us do it." * * * * Stretched like ferrets on the queen-sized bed, Jake and Logan massaged the shaved, V-shaped bush of Audrey's cunt. The pubes' smell of herring brine dispersed like the aroma of broiling fish. Salivating like hounds, Jake and Logan descended onto the pussy and licked its cherry-red folds. "Yes," Audrey lullabied, caressing their hair as she lay on the bed. Like Martian rovers, Jake and Logan's tongues roamed along opposite sides of a hill valley. The snaky muscles scooped up slabs of the trout juices. The nutrients invigorated the chaps' tongues like sugar drinks a couple of marathon runners. The erect mouth sponges plunged into the tonsil skin of Audrey's vaginal wall and almost sparked in the moist, airy heat. Jake and Logan pulled back, gasping as though coming off blowing a balloon. Glancing sideways at each other, they arched their eyebrows so as to say: Bisexual foreplay ain't so bad. The sophomores re-dove into the treasure trove. With hunger pangs in their gonads, they licked the oily fluids, tasted the fish-salty juices, and felt the girl's body temperature on the tip of their tongues. The cunt's sprinkle of pepper, however, tickled Logan beyond his range of endurance. Logan shogged back like an animal who couldn't take more of a poisonous plant. Still, he continued to feel the sting of Audrey's diet on his tongue, in his throat, and up his nose. Sliding into Logan's spot, Jake kept licking like there was no tomorrow. Suddenly, he stopped. "What's wrong?" Jake said, bending his back into a bowl as he propped up his torso like a seal. Kneeling to Jake's left, Logan hung his head. "Nothing," he whispered, a lump in his throat. "You're about to fuck the girl of your dreams," Jake said with pizzazz. "Why the sudden change of mood?" "I'm fine," Logan muttered, his peter overhanging the sheets like the branch of a coconut palm. Audrey sat up and took Logan's hand. "It's alright," she said, her tone soft as a silk dress. "Most straight guys start off afraid. You're not alone." "I've fucked girls before," Logan said, yanking his hand away. "But you've never shared them with a guy." "Let's just forget this," Logan said, his voice strained like an ultra-tight guitar string. A brittle silence dropped into the room like a huge cheesecloth. "As your pal, I won't let you deny our girlfriend," Jake said, lying across like a lizard. Have you flipped your wig? Logan's eyes slung at him. "We're in this together," Jake said, "for better or for worse." "Yeah?" Logan said. He, however, couldn't make a move toward the junior girl. Like the leaf of a rose stem, Audrey hung below Logan. Slowly, she kneeled toward his neck, and like a deer suckling a raspberry off a bush, she sucked his Adam's apple. Logan leaned his neck back and lay his hand on a shoulder of Audrey's. Strings of pre-cum oozed up Logan's penis, and his balls churned like milk being whipped slowly into butter. "Fuck!" Logan yowled. He grabbed her stringy hair, pulled her away from his neck, and kissed her. Audrey sucked back! Logan groped Audrey's buns of cinnamon. Audrey griped Logan's rumps of beef. Kissing thirstily, the two gyrated their bodies like spinning toy trompes. Logan might have been three inches taller than Audrey. But who knew what Jake was up to, and Logan couldn't afford to wait any longer. Awkward or not, then and there Logan slipped a hand away from Audrey's butt, grabbed his cock, and shoved it into her. "Uuhhh!" Audrey cried, her rabbit scream coming from below her high bosom. Logan dove onto the honeycomb of her tits. Thrusting up, he sucked an engorged nipple and kneaded the other breast as gently as he could. Madness, however, was bubbling inside his burning physique, and the breath of Jake was upon his back--warm like the scruff of a cat. Logan backhanded Jake's thigh. "Oooh!" Jake crowed, his cracking voice closing in like the buzz of a bee. "You really want pussy all to yourself, don't you?" Logan's ear lobes vibrated like tiny bells. How he wanted to put the jerk in his place. As his face warmed up to his lung heat, Logan unglued his lips from Audrey's casabas, halted his humping, and turned right. "You truly are a pain in the butt." "You wish," Jake said seductively. With his eyes, he brushed a long, gentle stroke down Logan's back and landed on Logan's slightly shrinked, sliced-in-half soccer balls. Jake's globes burned with naked lust, and his pupils held larger than typed Os. "What are you doing?" Logan said, fear lancing into his heart. "Pondering what could become my main course for today," Jake said, running his fingers above Logan's rumps. "If you make me pull out, I swear you'll get a real pain in your butt." Jake's face froze in a patch of eagerness and mild hurt. "You would fail to trust your bum to your buddy?" "Without hesitation," Logan said, turned front, and resumed his in-and-out rhythm. "After all I've done for you," Jake muttered, his voice laced with stunned bitterness. A nerve plucked in Logan, and he stopped thrusting. Puffing in discombobulation, he turned to Jake. "Why can't you let me enjoy my girlfriend?" "I am letting you enjoy her," Jake said. "All I want is to get a piece of your ass in the process. What the hell is wrong with that?" "Did I ask for a piece of your ass when you were fucking Audrey?" Logan rumbled, louder than the thunder of a Florida summer. "Let Logan enjoy me, tiger," Audrey chimed in. "You've had your chance." Jake lowered his chin with disillusionment. "Besides," Audrey said. "Logan isn't ready for that sort of thing, although I can get him to loosen up when the time's right." "You think you can manipulate guys into doing whatever you want," Logan spattered, facing her. "It's a turn-on for them," Audrey said casually. "They just hate to admit it." Logan impaled her pussy, jolting the bed. "Aaahh!" Audrey wailed. "So you want Jaky boy to fuck my butt," Logan said, keeping his gun in her holster. "Uh-huh!" "Does the thought of my machete in Jake's rear end excite you as much?" "Mmm-hmm!" she said, her eyelashes fluttering half-shut. Audrey's scent of salt-sprinkled watermelon infiltrated Logan's nostrils like mild perfume from an atomizer. Drenched with lust, Logan writhed his pelvis deep inside her. Pressing moistly, Audrey gyrated back. "Fucking hussy," Logan said, his cream of coconuts stirring like a toddy inside his balls. He slapped her high, tight rump. "You're wilder than Jaky dude." "Uh-huh! Uh-huh!" Audrey said, more to Logan's genital massage. Logan kneaded her buns. Audrey dough-pressed his. As their pubes scorched with friction, they started thrusting savagely against each other. "Argh!" Logan brayed, his gonads ready to explode. Logan suddenly pulled out. His head kept spinning. "Your turn, buddy," he said, unsure where the choppy waters of his emotions were leading. Jake's beady eyes changed from wounded eagerness to hesitation. "You wanna fuck my butt." "What would make you think that?" Logan said, lowering his butt onto his sock-clad heels. Logan's innocent tone must have given Jake the jeebees, for Jake started to zigzag his eyes in rushed pensiveness. The rug rat landed his orbs on the middle note of a funk song. "Nah," Jake croaked, lifting his eyes. "You go ahead. I shouldn't have interrupted." "Too late," Logan said. Jake sank his eyes, sorting more things in his head. "We can double-fuck her pussy," he said, his globes suddenly agog. Logan tried to picture the V of top bodies on the plane of the lying body. Instantly, he felt Jake's cock spraying warm goo alongside his buttery stick inside Audrey's swimmy pussy. "Bravo," Logan said, clapping. "I truly admire your attempt to deflect my wrath in the usual direction." He stopped applauding. "Maybe next time, as today, I'm gonna put you in your place." Jake's eyes glittered with a toned-down gloating. "Crap," Jake said, swinging his head as if snapping his fingers. "Fuck me before I change my mind." Like a car having stopped way ahead at a red light, Logan slithered back on his knees. Jake bumped forward, dragging his doorknob-fronted dick between his legs. "On your back," he said, pushing Audrey onto the sandalwood-scented crumple of sheets. Audrey's medium breasts flopped upon the landing. "Here, tiger," she said, throwing Logan a bottle of something. Logan caught it in the style of a baseball player. He unscrewed the plastic tube of blue, sniffed the o aperture, and felt an olfactory tingle. His drooping cock hardened to the scent of jasmine in coconut oil. "Bro," Jake said, pushing into Audrey. "Your pre-cum feels exquisite." "You haven't felt anything, yet," Logan said, watching from the side. "Wait till I inject some real cum into you." Pushing in and out, Jake's frankfurter sounded like a Chihuahua licking the pads of its paw. Swiftly, Logan upended the bottle, squeezed onto his palm, and rubbed the white cream onto his wiener. The mild coldness edged his hunger for the warmth of Jake's bowels. Quickly, Logan kneeled around him. Jake stopped thrusting and led Audrey's calves toward his shoulders. "That's it," he whispered. "Surrender to your papa." "Yes, pumpkin," Audrey purred. Jake buried himself deeper and rocked his hips from side to side. On the fluffy pillow, Audrey twisted her neck back and squinnied her eyes in rollicking pain. Holding the upturned bottle atop Jake's butt crack, Logan squeezed and rubbed the slipping ointment into Jake's slit. "Uuh!" Jake grunted. Logan dug a finger into the antelope-warm butt, squeezed past the sphincter muscle, and turned his finger as though it were a screwdriver. "Fuck!" Jake heaved, breathing hard. "I think I'm gonna shit." "Good try," Logan said. Not sure how else to stretch the rug rat's behind, he kneeled into place, grabbed his upward-curved dick, and fed it into Jake's end hole. Jake gnashed his teeth. Logan kept pushing. Never had Logan done anything this naughty before. The thought and feel of his act sent Logan's mind twirling with youthful energy. The future looked brighter than ever; Logan's emotions soared in restless optimism; and his body rippled with electricity. Such insanity! Dropping the bottle as though it were a straw, Logan laid his palm on the light-cream butt as a cushion, then pressed further into Jake. "Ughh!" Jake moaned in a high, whining tone. "You're a man, aren't you?" Logan said. "Yaw!" Jake wailed, throwing his head back like the drummer of a rock band. "Man," Logan said, sinking his hot dog into the raw, basted turkey. "You're tighter than a nut in a nutcracker." "Your cock is what's making things tight back there," Jake grouched, twisting his head left. "God!" Pushing slow and hard, Logan felt Jake's rectum squeezing--so that Jake seemed to be evacuating through Logan, with Logan's wiener Jake's long, wide stool. This was vulgarity to the extreme--Jake having corrupted Logan's less coarse persona. To this, Logan's cock bulged even more. "Stop!" Jake whined, his propped-up arms flanking Audrey's sides like poplars. "You wanted to fuck my girl, didn't you?" Logan said, his jelly-dabbed pubes of amber a ray from Jake's fleshy rumps. "Aaahh!" Jake snorted. "Then, take my cock!" Jake's body quaked like a ferry vrooming back from a dock. "That's it," Logan whispered, the curly, blond hairs on his legs caressing Jake's pancake-smooth hamstrings and calves. He wrapped his feet around Jake's--and relished the moist, rough feel of his white, cotton socks rubbing against Jake's black, cotton socks. "Nuh!" Jake babbled. Logan began to pump in and out. "Holy Mother of God!" Jake bellowed into the white ceiling. "Impregnate me," Audrey said, wrapping a hand under the cascading hair around Jake's nape. Jake rolled his head down and slid his arms forward as if they were a couple of door floor bars. "My sweet buttercup," he half-whispered. "Give me ... just ... a moment." With great strain, he re-started his copulative rhythm. The bed began to creak under the sturdy mattress. Sucking, gulping, and licking sounds came from in front of Logan, and they quickly filled the still bedroom. Leaning forward, Logan kissed a sole of Audrey's. Its balmy temperature and its smell of salted apricots drove him insane with lust. Again, he wanted to fuck the girl. Jake, however, dismounted Audrey's legs from his shoulders and pushed her hamstrings back along her flat, tight abdomen. "Asshole!" Logan said, his blood turning pink with anger. He tore open Jake's sleek hair and bit the rear of Jake's shoulder. "Fuckin' horndog!" Jake bawled, turning back and shaking to a standstill. Logan licked the wound before Logan knew what he was doing. To hell with it! Logan protested and licked harder. "I'm gonna get back at your entire rear side!" Jake brayed, erecting his back. "You'll see." Logan sniffed the cheese-smelling skin, caressing Jake's thighs. "So you like my dirty butt," Jake said, trying to get a reaction. Logan continued to snuff the pig-warm skin. Turning forward, Jake resumed his thrusts. He, however, stayed up. With Jake's L position, Logan couldn't maneuver as freely as before. The experience became like reclining on a board that had been staked loosely into the soil. In revenge, Logan slapped Jake's rump, kneaded it, and jolted the force of his entire physique into Jake through his cock. "Awww!" Jake wailed, his back bubbling with moistness. Logan pulled out. Jake leaned forward. Logan slammed in. "Uh!" Audrey crooned like a little girl. "Look at what you're making me go through back there," Jake said. He sucked her lips as if devouring a strawberry. Logan pistoned with the force of a turbo-fan engine. Jake passed the jolting energy to Audrey. The bed squeaked louder and faster; the guys' grunts and groans sucked more air from the room; and Audrey's moans topped the dudes' sounds at the end of each round. "I'm getting close!" Logan yelped. "All right," Jake said with teenage sauciness. "Mr. Toughguy's about to become a confirmed homo." "Yeah?" Logan said, his pecker spritzing like a popping can of soda. "Yeah!" Jake crowed louder than Logan. "Fucking whoreslut!" "Uh-huh! Uh-huh!" Jake panted, gyrating his pelvis like a cobra. "Honeycomb! I can't believe I'm about to ... cum in ... your sweet ... pussy!" Logan humped deeper, harder, and faster. "Oh, yeah! Oh, yeah!" "Fuck my butt!" Jake grated, turning back. "Uuhhh!" Logan heaved. "That's it! Shoot your seed into me." "Here it comes! Here it comes!" Logan gasped, horrified and ecstatic at the prospect. "I'm gonna rip!" Gushing up, the hot cream scorched Logan's urethra and sprayed into Jake's poop chute. Jake tightened his sphincter. "Fuckin' A!" Logan said, bending his back into a reversed C. His cock kept sprinkling into Jake. "Argh! Argh! Urgh!" Jake yawped. "Uuhhh! Uuhhh! Uuhhh!" Audrey whooped. Logan continued to squirt into Jake--two, four, eight more times! His balls and heart sizzled and melted like butter on a high fire. Jake kept tightening and relaxing his pooper. "Lord Have Mercy!" he said, slapping his forehead onto Audrey's chest. At last, Logan collapsed on Jake's back. * * * * The smell of lecithin overtook the wood-scented air; the formerly cool room itched with a mildly sticky warmth; and silence fell upon the place like a wedding veil. Eyes closed, Logan smiled placidly. Lusciously, he felt his flaccid, creamy dick inside Jake's butt. "That was the best fuck I've ever had." "Tell me about it," Jake said, resting on Audrey. "I had to take double the torture." "We have to do this again," Logan mumbled, gently stroking Jake's hips. "Only if we all agree to be a threesome," Audrey said. "That sure will be a challenge in this day and age," Logan said, relishing the vibration of his cheek upon Jake's back. "We have a growing bunch of wild college dudes on our side," Jake hummed down his spine. "That's true," Logan said languidly. He slowly opened his eyes. "Remember," Audrey said. "You're heteroromantic guys, and I don't expect you to fall romantically for each other. Just because you're straight in the romantic sense, however, doesn't mean that you can't be bisexual. That's what the neo-hippie movement is all about--straight college guys who're proud, open bisexuals. If you're good buddies, you'll be able to handle sharing your girlfriend." "I'm getting hard just hearing about this," Jake said. "Good," Audrey said. "But first, you must promise to be good to each other--and to share me without going berserk." "I agree," Logan said. "Ditto," Jake mumbled. "Alright," Audrey said.