Date: Thu, 14 Oct 1999 15:03:31 -0700 (PDT) From: UK Delivery Man Subject: Gary The Uk Delivery Man - Chapter 3 GARY, THE UK DELIVERY MAN The Autobiography of the Gay Life of a Truly "Bi" Married Man Chapter 3 - Leaving London When Jackie and I decided to get married, we also decided that we wanted children and so it seemed sensible to move out of London. We bought a house on the south coast of England between Chichester and Portsmouth in the village where I was brought up and I stated my own business delivering wholesale groceries to small outlets like pubs, clubs, village shops and camp sites. I make a good living although it's very erratic, busy in the summer when the tourists are about and then quiet in the winter. Although it's busy, the summer is my favourite time of the year; I make lots of money and wherever you look it's wall to wall men in casual gear, shorts, swimwear and lots of exposed flesh. One of my regular deliveries is to a local camp site which is owned by a pillar of the local community, Mr Wilson, who's a real miserable bastard. I'd known him since I was a child, he ran the local scout troop, was a town councillor but was a sad, sad person. He was divorced a long time ago and his daughter, who I used to fantasise about when I was about 14, had gone with her. Mother to start a new life in another part of the country. Whenever I deliver to him there's always something wrong, he enjoys being difficult and at that time l felt that he loved making my life a misery, just as he did when I was in his scout troop and he's never wants to pay his account, so I'd agreed that I'd only supply him "cash on delivery". One morning during the first summer after I started the business, I made my usual delivery to the camp site around 7am before the site shop was open. He complained as usual while I stacked all the boxes and then told me that he's have to go back to his bungalow on site to get the cash. I was dressed in my usual delivery gear of light grey sweat pants, white T-shirt that was just a little too tight and trainers. I was having a gay day (see Gary 2) and was definitely in the mood for some action. I stood inside the shop and looked out through the blinds. Immediately adjoining the shop was the tent camping field and in the next field were caravans and campers. About 15 yards from the front of the shop was a small back-packers tent surrounded by larger family sized frame tents. As I watched, the zip on the small tent was pulled down and out came one of the most beautiful men I'd ever seen. He was about 5'9" and stocky, but it wasn't fat, it was all muscle. He had black curly hair and was wearing nothing but a tiny pair of green cotton shorts. His chest was covered in a thick mat of black hair, a little more than I usually went for, but so what! His legs were also hairy but I could see that they were well defined. His skin was olive and it was obvious that he came from a Mediterranean country. Those green shorts bulged invitingly showing what was probably a morning erection. He was gorgeous and he knew it! He stood where he knew that anyone that wanted to could see him and started to exercise, stretching and flexing his muscles. My cock had already started to uncoil and in the privacy of the empty shop with the blind down, I slipped my hand into my sweat pants and started to gently massage my cock. It was very quickly like iron and I started to fantasise about what I'd so to "Carlos" as I'd named him. I didn't hear Wilson come back into the shop until he spoke "He's quite a hunk our Spaniard, Juan-Antonio and I can see he's really turned you on". I pulled my hand our of my pants and said "I don't know what you mean Mr Wilson" "Crap!" he replied "look at the front of your trousers". Of course my dick was tenting out the fabric like a flag pole. "Well" he continued "I never had you down as swinging both ways Gary". I didn't know what to say. All I could think was "Fucking hell, of all people to find out it had to be him". I held my clip board in front of me to cover my still hard dick, and turned to look at him. Surprise, surprise he was smiling, this was a red-letter day! "Can you keep a secret?" he asked "I really don't have a lot of choice do I!" I replied "Well come over to the bungalow" he continued " and I'll show you something that'll blow your socks off!" I trailed behind him as he walked out of the back door of the shop and locked it. I know what was going to happen, he'd want me to suck him or fuck him or even worse he'd want to fuck me and I don't go in for anal sex. Not only does he have a nasty personality, he looks gross too. He's around 5'8" tall, about 18 stone (250lbs for my readers in the US - 115 kilos for those in continental Europe) with more rolls of fat than the Pillsbury Dough Boy (and even less cute), greasy, lank greying hair and I was going to be expected to have sex with it. I would have told him where to stick it, but he knew my wife and my parents and he would have told them for sure. I'd rather have sex with my granddad than him, I really would. We approached the bungalow which was part of a new central complex of the camp site which included the men's and women's toilets and showers and the laundry room. We went in through the back door and straight to him bedroom - I felt physically sick! The bedroom was a tip, he probably hadn't cleaned it for weeks, clothes all over the floor, dirty cups and plates and an overflowing ashtray on the bedside table. The bed was unmade and the sheets were a nasty shade of grey with various stains. Two walls were covered in floor to ceiling curtains and given the layout of the bungalow and the complex I couldn't work out why because I couldn't see how the room could be on a corner and so have two sets of windows. "Are you sure you can keep a secret?" he asked, still smiling "Yes, of course I can" I replied thinking that all I wanted to do was to get it over and done with and hoped that he wouldn't hold this against me for ever - I had visions of being at his beck-and-call for sex whenever he wanted it. He pulled the cord that operated the curtains on one wall and they slid back. FUCKING HELL, HOLY SHIT!!! I couldn't believe what lay before me. There were three 2' x 3' windows and each one looked into a different shower cubicle. He'd recently had them rebuilt and each large cubicle contained a wash basin which was in front of the window, a toilet and a French style shower which is part of the room and just has a drain in the floor. As the room is so big nothing gets wet so it doesn't need a shower curtain. Then I realised that the windows weren't windows at all - they were two-way mirrors! So Wilson was a voyeur, big style! At least now I'd seen this we'd got something on each other so there was no way that he could tell my little secret. "Not bad is it?" I nodded dumbly while my imagination ran riot thinking about what we'd see here. "Quickly Gary" he said with a note of urgency "he'll be here in a minute or two" and with that he started to pull his clothes off. That brought me back to earth with a jolt. My imagination had not been bad enough - he looked like a beached whale in his yellow stained underwear and when he finally took his pants off it was difficult not to laugh. His balls were tiny and pulled up so tightly to his body you could be forgiven for thinking he hadn't got any and his uncircumcised prick was so small, his foreskin was longer than his cock! "Come on, come on" he urged, with the usual nasty edge coming back into his voice. I sighed and took my T-shirt off. Wilson whistled through his teeth "Nice chest Gary" I didn't say a word but slipped off my sweat pants and stood there in my KC's. I was so turned off by the sight of this man there was every chance that my prick would have disappeared like his (figure of speech!) I pulled off the KC's. I needn't have worried, my 6" cock still hung down over my not insignificant balls. "What a cock" he gasped "it's lucky I didn't know you'd got that when you were in my scout troop or I might have got into trouble." "In your fucking dreams" I thought. My attention was drawn back as the door to the first shower room opened, I held my breath, would it be Juan-Antonio? No, it was an old man of about 70 from one of the caravans. He stripped to reveal a very skinny but tanned body. Lots of wrinkles, covered in grey hair, tiny shrivelled prick, not a pretty site. But it did something for Wilson though and his cock started to grow a little. A couple of minutes later the second door opened and there was Juan-Antonio, still gorgeous and still apparently sporting a hard-on. "He's been here for 5 days and comes in here every morning about this time" whispered Wilson "watch Gary, he always does the same thing" Juan-Antonio kicked off his trainers and then dropped his shorts. I was right on two counts: 1) he wasn't wearing any underwear and 2) he had a stiffy. His cock was a joy, only about 6" long, uncircumcised, but so thick - it was like a Coke can!! He pushed his dick down towards the toilet and waited to piss - he must have waited for around 45 seconds until if softened enough to allow him to do it. My cock had sprung up like a rock - this certainly was a great way to start the day. I looked over at Wilson, his cock was a real surprise packet. It got longer and longer and longer until it was about 6" long still pointing downwards and then it added another inch as it heaved itself up to the horizontal. It only goes to show that "you can't tell what you're going to get, until the alterations are done!" But having said all that Wilson still did nothing for me and I was silently praying that I wouldn't have to get to know his dick better. He must have read my mind. "Don't worry Gary. I'm a voyeur and I only have sex solo, its my thing. The worst I'll ever ask you to do is wank yourself off while I watch and do the same" I breathed a sigh of relief - that I could handle - I look good, and if someone else can get off on that then I take it as real flattery. I turned my attention to Juan-Antonio. He turned on the shower, adjusted the temperature and then took a bottle of shower gel from his wash bag. He walked under the jets and began to lather his body. He quickly washed his hair, face, neck and legs and then soaped his chest. He spent what seemed like an eternity soaping his nipples and they get bigger and darker as he teased them, giving each a pinch every so often. He was obviously extremely nipple sensitive as each time he nipped them, he gave a little gasp and his cock gave an involuntary twitch. He slowly soaped down his body carefully avoiding his cock, the head of which was by now dark purple in colour and looking as if it would burst. It wasn't a pretty dick, it was angry looking, gnarled, veiny, and I wanted it in my mouth right there and then. He lathered his inner thighs and then his balls whilst still playing with his nipples with the other hand; by this time he had thrown his head back, had his eyes closed and was panting gently. It was so erotic. I looked over at Wilson; he was beating his meat like his life depended on it and was so engrossed in what he was doing I could have dressed and walked away without him knowing. Of course I didn't, I wasn't going to miss this Spanish offering towards International relations. Juan-Antonio obviously couldn't wait any longer and started to jack off at about 90 miles an hour using a pressure of 100lbs per square inch and within about ten seconds he was close to the point of no return. Just then the tension of the moment was broken by Wilson coming off with a violence which was surprising for a man of his age. He was trying very hard not to make a noise (obviously there was no sound-proofing - must remember that when my turn comes) - and he caught spurt after spurt in his already stained underpants. It was horrible to see and I couldn't help wondering if he would put them on again when we'd finished - what a passion killer! I turned back to Juan-Antonio - his head was even further back and I could see the veins in his neck throb. He was about five feet from the mirror and yet the first spurt hit it full force, splattering into a blob about 3" in diameter. Wilson returned to type "Dirty bastard, I'll have to go in and clean that mirror again now!" There's no pleasing some people. Although I didn't want to I stopped jacking - Juan-Antonio had cum, Wilson had cum and somehow it seemed rude to carry on. Reluctantly I started to pull on my KC's. "No Gary" hissed Wilson "wait .. if it's like the other days, he hasn't finished yet" "Sorry? You mean he's going to do it again?" "Yeah and it'll be better, I promise" Gratefully, off came the KC's for a second time and I lazily worked myself off while I watched. Juan-Antonio's cock had gone down a bit but was but no means soft. He went over to the toilet and pissed again. Golden showers does nothing for me, but it must have been one of Wilson's favourites because his cock shot up like it was jet propelled. Jean-Antonio gave it a good shake and came to the basin to shave. Wilson and I stood close to the mirror; It was really odd to think that we were no more than 18" away from this beautiful, naked, God of a man and he knew nothing about it. I could get used to this if only I could be watching with someone I fancied rather than the old misery. Juan-Antonio admired himself in the mirror - he obviously loved himself, big-time! As he shaved, he looked at himself from more angles than were necessary and as he looked at himself his cock started to rise again. He was so near to me and yet so far, without the mirror I could have reached out and helped him out with his problem. He moved so that his hard cock was resting on the top of the basin and slowly moved backward and forwards as he completed his shave. Each move forwards revealed his huge thick purple head, as he moved back the skin covered it over again. Pre- cum was beginning to ooze from his slit yet again. Wilson and I were enthralled! I grabbed my prick and started to "beat the bishop" in earnest. "Slow down Gary" said Wilson "here comes the best bit" "What best bit?" "Watch!!" Juan-Antonio finished his shave, put away his razor and shaving gel, took out his toothbrush, squirted some toothpaste on it and began to clean his teeth. "What's to special about him cleaning his teeth?" "For Chrissake will you just wait!!!" As he cleaned his teeth with his left hand he grabbed his dick and began another leisurely wank stopping only to cup some water in his hands to swill out his mouth. He washed his toothbrush, then bent over and shoved the handle straight up his arse!!! In and in it went until there was only the bristles and about an inch of handle showing - he stood up and held it in place presumably by muscle power alone. This obviously "hit the spot" because his breathing became very laboured and his cock seemed to get even thicker as he jacked faster and faster. His pre-cum was almost a stream and had been dropping onto the floor but now he cupped one hand under his slit and, having collected a small puddle, put it to his mouth and began to lick it off. By now I was so carried away if I couldn't have stopped if my life depended on it. I matched my jerks with Juan-Antonio's and we came off together. Unfortunately, all seven of my spurts hit the mirror and I immediately knew that Wilson would make me clean it off before I left. Juan Antonio on the other hand was more careful and directed his into the basin where he thoughtfully turned the tap on and washed it away. He removed the toothbrush, washed the handle, dried himself and put on a fresh pair of shorts; combed his hair, packed up his things and left and I'm sure that as he left he still had a hard-on. I turned away from Wilson and dressed, when I turned back he was dressed too so I never did get to see if he had put on clean underwear, but I like to think that he did. That day was the beginning of an exciting diversion which still goes on today! I have seen some amazing sights but thought that you might be interested in a few statistics which Bernard (I'm allowed to call Wilson by his first name now) and I have put together. I feel privileged to have seen so many cocks both soft and hard belonging to straight as well as gay men - few people (even doctors or nurses) get this opportunity. So here goes The average cock is between 5" and 8" in length so stories where everyone has 10" or even 12" dicks is greatly exaggerated and almost all fantasy - I've only seen one that size (but that's another story which I'll tell you at a later date). It doesn't matter how big or small they are when soft - they all puff up to a similar size. Width does vary a lot, from the Coke can to the pencil! Cocks that are big when soft don't seem to get quite as hard as those that are like a tiny spring. Don't ask me why, it's just what I've seen. At least 50% of all men under the age of 60 that go for a shower have a wank too! How they wank varies too - some use the whole hand method, some put four fingers underneath and just the thumb on top, some roll it between their hands, some pull the skin down tight and massage under the tip with just one finger. Although I'm not really into teenagers, a 15 year old whose body is still that of a child but whose cock is that of a man is very horny. The best wankers are young married men with children; they stay in tents so sex is probably banned in case the kids hear, so by the time they come for a shower they are Rampant with a capital 'R'. They're usually in their mid-20's to mid-30's so their bodies are still in good shape (in most cases) and of course as they think they can't be seen by anyone they're very uninhibited - if they only knew that a gay voyeur and a bi sex maniac were watching, I hate to think what would happen. So, if you're camping between Chichester and Portsmouth and the showers have large mirrors over the basins - put on a good display, Bernard and I could well be watching - but don't come over the mirror!!!! By the way, don't go looking for a site run by Bernard Wilson - the name has been changed to protect the guilty. If you enjoyed this and my other chapters, e-mail me and let me about it. Flames will of course, be ignored.