Summer of Twelve - Chapter 6

In which Critter and me get fantastic tans, learn about bait-and-switch, have a play date with Spencer, and become professional models

Critter and me did chores for Grandpa every day for a week. We would go over in the morning after breakfast, and he would invite us to have a swim before we did any work. Who could turn that down? He loved to watch us skinny dipping while he sipped a mimosa in the shade of an umbrella. It wasn't a solid hour of wild physical play like the first day. About half the time we would lay in the sun near his lounge chair and listen to his stories from when he was our age. He would get misty sometimes and Critter and me learned to go jump in the water and play for a while so he could sort things out. He didn't like for us to see him that way.

After an hour or so, he would give us our chores assignments and we would get to work. Cleaning the pool had been a big chore, longer than the usual. Most days, if we worked hard, we could be done in about an hour. So we did work hard. Grandpa liked that also. He would try to pay us and we would tell him we were coming back for more chores before dinner, so he could pay us for both in the evening. He always seemed happy about that.

The main difference between morning chores and evening chores was we did our swimming after we did the chores instead of before. He would get another chance to watch us frolic and tell his stories. He was a good storyteller, and he had a lot of stories. Him and his brother and their gang of friends got up to some crazy stuff when they were kids. About half the time, they all ended up getting spankings, but that didn't seem to stop them.

He would pay us in the evening and he always paid well. Very well. After a week of that, Critter and me were rich. Well, kid rich. It was more money than we knew what to do with, but it was actually Grandpa that put a pause to it.

"Boys," he said, "This has been a wonderful week for me. You've got the place in ship shape, and you've let me relive some of the best days of my life."

"You're a good storyteller, Grandpa" Critter said.

"You boys are good listeners and hard workers." he replied. "I don't want to stoop to making busy-work for you just so I can bend your ears. Also, I don't want to monopolize your summer. You boys need to get up to some shenanigans so you'll have stories to tell when you get old."

"You've given us a few ideas, sir." I said, grinning.

"Well there we are!" He said "Check back with me in a couple of weeks. I'll probably have some more chores for you, and maybe you can brag about some hell raising by then. I promise to keep it in strict confidence."

In addition to getting kid rich from a week of chores, we also erased our tan lines from a week of skinny dipping twice a day. Our hair had sun highlights and our freckle sprays had spread from the bridges of our noses out to our cheekbones. That's what led to the pictures.

Bait and Switch

It was just a couple of days after we finished doing chores for Grandpa that another big sleepover happened. My mom was taking Mikey and Donny for the night so Ms. Martin could go on a date with Mr. Bernard. It looked like there were going to be six kids in the house that night, including Molly.

All us boys were wearing underwear, because we still hadn't let my mom in on how Molly had seen the water fight. It was a little frustrating, but it also felt fun to be getting away with something. It was a work night for my mom, so we expected her to go to bed pretty early again, so we could get up to some shenanigans after we were sure she was asleep.

"Truth or Dare again tonight, after Mom goes to bed?" Lisa said, conspiratorially.

The four of us older kids were playing crazy eights, sitting in a circle on Lisa's bed.

"Nah, let's cut to the chase and play spin the bottle." Molly said.

"What's that?" Critter asked.

The phone rang at that moment, but instead of pouncing on the extension in her room, Lisa let it ring so my mom would have to answer.

"We sit in a circle, like this," Molly said, "And we get an empty coke bottle and put it in the middle. We take turns spinning the bottle. On your turn, when you spin the bottle, you gotta kiss whoever it's pointing at."

"So I might have to kiss Lisa?" Critter said.

"Oh come on Critter!" Lisa said. "I swear I won't bite! Besides, you might get to kiss Chris also."

I got an instant boner from that. I had to reach into my briefs to make an adjustment so it could stand up comfortably.

"Well there's one yes vote." Molly said, grinning. "Boys are sort of like Pinocchio, there's some things they can't lie about."

I blushed, but grinned and nodded vigorously.

"Make that two." Lisa said, pointing to the tent in Critter's briefs.

Critter just smiled happily.

My mom came into the room then and made an announcement.

"Change of plans, boys." she said. "That was Ms. Martin on the phone. She has to show a commercial property tonight. In just about an hour. Because of the prowler, she doesn't want to leave the house empty after dark, so she wants you boys to spend the night over there instead. Put on some shorts and get over there as quick as you can." She left the room.

"Another fucking bait and switch!" Molly said. "I swear somebody upstairs wants me to die a virgin."

"We still got Mikey and Donny." Lisa said.

"But Chris and Critter are gonna go over there and make out like crazy as soon as Critter's mom leaves the house." Molly said, "And I don't even get to watch."

"I bet I can talk my mom into letting us give the little boys their bath tonight, since Chris is not gonna be here." Lisa said.

"Like actually wash them?" Molly said.

"All over. Every little part." Lisa said.

Molly heaved an exaggerated sigh, but betrayed herself with a wicked grin. "Well, I suppose it'll have to do..."

"Get a move on boys!" my mom called from down the hall.

Fifteen minutes later, Critter and me were rolling up the driveway at his house. Mr. Bernard's car was there.

"I guess Mr. B is gonna need to take a rain check tonight." I said "How often does your mom have to show a property after dark?"

"I can't remember it ever happening before." Critter said.

When we got inside, things were strangely calm. I expected Ms. M to be in the frantic stages of putting herself together to meet an important client, and Mr. B to be... Well, I didn't have any expectations there. I couldn't remember him ever seeming stressed.

But instead, both grownups were seated on the sofa. They were both dressed casually, not dressed up at all, like for either a date or for work. Mr. B was on the end, Ms. M was leaning against him from the center, her legs stretched out on the rest of the sofa. Both of them had a grownup drink within reach. Ms. M had her shoes off.

"Hello boys." she said. "Thanks for coming over on such short notice."

"Ms. Akter said you needed us right away 'cause you had to show a property tonight and didn't want to leave the house empty." Critter said.

"I'm sorry for the bait and switch, honey." she said. "But I did that so you and Chris could have an easy explanation for your younger siblings."

Critter and me both said "Hunh?" at about the same time.

"Tonight is really about you boys." Mr. B said. "The deception was so you can have a chance to be fully informed and make your decisions accordingly."

The phone rang.

"I'll get it." Critter said.

"Chris should answer this call." Ms. Martin said.

It was my mom. In a few sentences, she let me know that it was all planned. I had her permission to do anything Mr. B proposed, but I also had her permission to decline. I tried to get her to tell me what was going on, but she only said she wanted this choice about my future, for good or ill, to be wholly my own.

I went back to the living room, more baffled than before, only to find Critter bare naked.

"You should get comfortable." Ms. M said.

I shed my clothes and tossed them on Critter's pile, then sat down next to him on the floor, across the coffee table from the grownups on the couch.

"I am a professional photographer." Mr. B said. "My works have been displayed in art galleries around the world. I'm not exactly famous, but within select circles, my name is well known."

Critter and me both nodded, sitting criss-cross on the floor across from the grownups.

"My choice of photographic subjects is wide ranging, from still-life, to landscape, to abandoned architecture. I've won awards for all of them. But my passion is the human form." he said.

"So... people?" Critter asked.

"People of all ages." Mr. B said. "But young people, whose bodies are on the cusp of transformation, on whom adolescence will soon work its changes willy-nilly, those are the photos I most prize." He pointed to a thick photo album on the coffee table. "Please open that and peruse the photos. They are all my work."

Critter and me shuffled up to the coffee table, sitting on our heels. The book was upside down to us at first, so I turned it around, then opened the front cover. The very first page caught my imagination.

It was a boy, about my age, standing in surf over his ankles. He was turned three-quarters away from the camera, but his nakedness was undeniable. The photo was in black and white, making it high resolution and also timeless. We looked at it for several long moments.

"Wow!" I said. "This is a really good picture."

Critter nodded and turned the page. It was another picture of the same boy. Still on the beach but from a different angle, he was half in shadow and half in the light. He was facing the camera, but a rock formation hid his crotch.

I tried to think of something nice to say about each picture, but I ran out of words after the second one. Critter and me were mesmerized, just turning each page and spending a solid minute soaking it in.

After about six pictures, I found my voice again. "Who is this kid?" I said. "Is he a model or something?"

"That is my Spencer." Mr. B said. "But if you will turn the page, you will see that Spencer is a girl."

I turned the page, but this time there was a piece of paper slid under the plastic film that held the photo on the page. The paper screened the lower half of the kid's body. There was a small envelope taped to the covering also, with the word Papa written on the outside. Mr. B leaned forward and took the envelope. He read it and then smiled.

"Even though you cannot see for yourself just yet, her actions here are quite feminine." he said. "My Spencer wishes to be coy with the two of you."

"Coy?" Critter said.

"She's playing hard to get." Ms. M said.

"But... with us?" I said. "Me and Critter?"

"I have told her about you boys." he said. "About your beauty, your carefree nature, your love for each other."

"Boys can't be beautiful." Critter said.

"They most certainly can be." Mr. B. said. "And you most certainly are. The quality of beauty is not something that is reserved for women. It is not in conflict with your sex, but enhances it instead."

Critter and me were blushing like crazy.

"He's not calling you sissies." Ms. M said. "He's just saying you're very good looking. Like Spencer."

We finished looking through the book. Not all of the pictures were nudes, but most were. Often there was some prop or the pose itself that concealed the juncture of Spencer's legs, but there was no care taken to hide her chest. It was easy to believe that she was a boy, except that about a fourth of the pictures were masked. Spencer had gone to considerable trouble to go through the thick book in detail to preserve her modesty.

"These photos are in several private collections with a very select group of my patrons." Mr. B said. "They share my passion for the human form prior to the workings of adolescence. And that is the problem."

"Problem?" I said.

"My Spencer may not look it to your eyes, but her days as a tomboy are numbered." he said. "Adolescence will soon reshape her body into its womanly form. She will always be beautiful in my eyes, but for my select patrons, they will no longer be interested in photos of her."

"You want to take pictures of Chris and me?" Critter said.

"You are a very perceptive boy." Mr. B said.

"That's my Critter." Ms. M said.

"A model is paid a sitting fee for their time in front of the camera." Mr. B said. "And a commercial model may receive royalties based on the distribution of their likeness." Mr. B had a sip from his drink.

"But I won't bore you boys with financials details." he said. "I've worked those out with your mothers already. Let it suffice to say that Spencer never lacks for spending money, and she has a substantial start on her college fund, all of it from her modelling."

"So this is what my mom meant about my future." I said. "When she called a little while ago."

"I also want to assure you boys that any photos I might take of you will be handled with utmost discretion." Mr. B said. "While non of these photos are technically illegal, they could cause a scandal for my select patrons. So they are distributed through... diplomatic channels. They will be handled as if they were state secrets."

"You wanna do it?" I said to Critter.

He nodded. "I'll do it if you do it."

Our first photo shoot

They were ready for us right away. Ms. M led us back to the guest room. It had been rearranged to an impromptu studio. There were bed sheets thumb tacked to two walls and bright lights on stands in the corners. The furniture was all moved out in the hall, except for the bed, which was covered by the bed sheets. Even the floor had sheets laid on it so the carpeting was covered.

Critter and me were clueless but Mr. B was a good instructor. He explained this first session was more about helping us feel natural in front of the camera than it was about getting any good shots. He went through six rolls of film in the next hour or so.

We posed together and separately; facing the camera, facing off the camera, and facing each other. We posed with props hiding our boy bits, with our poses hiding them, and with nothing hiding them at all.

After an hour, Ms. M called for a break.

"Claude and I will go and make ourselves another drink." she said. "When we come back, you boys should both have erections."

"You mean boners?" I said

"A coarse yet playful word." Mr. B said. "So like a boy."

After they left, Critter looked at me. "Since we didn't get to play spin the bottle tonight, can I just have a kiss?"

It was another Critter moment so I had to hug him right away. We were still kissing five minutes later when the grownups came back. We had fulfilled the requirement to both have boners.

"They are such a cute couple." Ms. M said.

"Literally made for each other." Mr. B said.

Mr. B went through another three rolls of film in the next hour. He posed us more carefully, taking care to keep our pictures legal. He said he knew the laws in detail. It was weird at first, posing with a coat hook sticking out in front of me. It must have been weirder for Critter, since his mom was watching, but he stayed hard the whole time. But boners are contagious and him and me kept each other hard the whole time.

"That will do nicely." Mr. B finally said. "Christopher, Critter, I want to thank you both. You take instruction well and are quick students."

"Thank you, sir." I said.

Critter just nodded and smiled. He moved beside me and hung on my shoulder in a side hug. I loved it when he did that.

"Let's get this little studio broken down." Ms. M said. "You boys are sleeping in here tonight so you can have some privacy."

Critter and me went wide eyed then.

She tousled our hair. "You're lovers." she said. "Don't imagine it's a secret anymore. And don't be ashamed, you two are literally peas in a pod. Being lovers should be as natural as breathing for you. You're so adorable when you're blushing."

The studio breakdown took only a few minutes. Critter and me helped as much as we could, but shuttling the photography stuff out to Mr. B's car was something we couldn't help with because we were naked.

But fifteen minutes later, we were done.

"Claude and I are going to bed." Ms. M said. "Unless the house catches fire, we do not wish to be disturbed."

"Yes ma'am" Critter said.

"I'm taking the day off tomorrow, so I know you boys will be up and about before we grownups awaken." she said. "You boys should feel free to get about your day's adventures. The only request I have is that you make a pot of coffee for us before you leave the house."

"I can do that, ma'am" I said.

"I will pay you your babysitting wage if you will do that one thing." Ms. M said.

"I won't take money for babysitting Critter anymore." I said. "He's my brother."

Critter squeezed me double tight just then. Apparently, I could do Critter moments also.

"We can work out the details later." she said, "You boys have a good night together."

A few minutes later, the grownups had closed the door to Ms. M's bedroom. Critter and me were standing in the guest room, the furniture still just pushed inside the door, but the bed sheets had all been taken down. We were both still boned.

"I think we just got permission to make love." I said.

"Who the fuck needs permission?" he said, imitating Molly's voice. "Forgiveness is easier."

We shared three orgasms in the next thirty minutes, by our preferred method of frottage. The first was frantic and desperate, the rest were patient and luxurious. We fell asleep in each other's arms.

The play date

A couple days later, Mr. B was at my house. Lisa was having a sleepover at Molly's house. Mikey and Donny were at Critter's house. Critter was by my side. Mr. B and my mom were going out that night, but before they left, we all sat down and looked at the half-dozen pictures that came out of the photo shoot that Mr. B deemed suitable to send to his patrons to see if his two new models suited their sensibilities.

There were one each of me and Critter solo, the rest were the two of us posing together. In one of those, our erections were visible. Not the focus of the picture, just in it.

"I would not normally expect to get this many quality photos from a first session with not one, but two new models." Mr. B said. "The camera loves both of you."

"These are amazing photos, Claude." my mother said. "Yuka's Critter and my Chris are good looking boys, no doubt, but you've worked some magic here and made them works of art."

"Photography is my craft." Mr. B said. "Also, I have a capable assistant in the dark room. My Spencer helps me to be able to focus on artistic merit and not technical details."

"Spencer helped you develop these?" Critter said.

"Not just these, but all nine rolls." he said. "I hope that does not bother you. After all, you viewed many pictures of her a few nights ago."

"She got to cover her girl parts before we saw them." I said.

"Girls have the privilege of mystery, but boys should not be modest." my mom said.

"Yes ma'am."

"My Spencer would like to have a play date with you boys next Saturday." Mr. B said. "She has a particular form and place she would like to set as a precondition."

"What does that mean, sir?" Critter said.

"If I have not mentioned this before, I apologize." Mr. B said. "But my Spencer is a ferocious tomboy. She wishes to meet you boys as a boy. She wants to be able to spend some hours masquerading as a boy, in the company of two boys with whom she feels comfortable. She wants to do this in a public place where, at least during daylight hours, unaccompanied children of your ages do not merit a second thought."

Right after breakfast the next Saturday morning, Critter and me rode our bikes the several miles to get to the big park that was about midway between our neighborhood and wherever Spencer lived. My mom had put us both in the car and driven us the route ahead of time. She wasn't worried about how long we would be gone or anything like that, she just wanted to make sure we didn't need to ride our bicycles on main roads, and could cross them where there was a traffic light and a crosswalk.

We rolled up to the agreed upon picnic table, and no surprise, Spencer was already there. I knew his face immediately, from all the photos I had viewed. What did surprise me was how perfectly boy she looked. Spencer had been to a barber recently, so his/her hair was far more in compliance to the 'boy haircut' standard. Critter and me looked almost shaggy next to them.

"Hi!" Spencer said, even before Critter and me had quite got off our bikes. "I'm Spence. You guys gotta be Critter and Chris."

Critter and me laughed and grinned. When Spence stood, I could see he was taller than me, almost as tall as Molly, though a bit more slender. It was a strange meeting, we all three had seen each other naked even though we'd never met in person. We ended up trading awkward handshakes

"First thing I wanna do is lose the shirts." Spence said. "It's gonna be a hot and shweddy day anyway, let's skip the line." It was so easy and natural, peeling off our shirts and tucking them into the waistband of our cutoffs. Spencer was as flat-chested as Critter and me.

The park was huge, a big square about a half mile on a side. None of us had really spent much time at that park, so it was full of new places to explore. The city had been improving the park for about 50 years, so it felt like we were Lewis and Clark. Since it was Saturday, there were a lot of families there, and most of them had kids along. We fit right in.

Lunch found us at a mom and pop taco shop across the street from the park. A taco stand was kind of novelty dining fare, but all three of us boys were open to new things. We were having a fun/stupid argument about if you should lay your head down sideways to bite the taco, so it wouldn't spill, or if spillage was part of the taco experience. We were sitting at the outside tables, because "no shirt no shoes no service." So long as we placed our order at the walk-up window and never set foot in the lobby, we could skip the shirts.

A teenage boy rode up on a motorcycle. He was wearing a white, button-up shirt, like a dress shirt, but he had torn the sleeves off. His pants were kind of short on him, like he needed to turn them into cut offs. "Hey, sorry to bug you, but do any of you live around here?" he said.

"Not exactly around here," I said, "but maybe I can help."

"Great!" he said. "I'm from out of town and I think I got my directions confused." He named the specific address he was looking for.

"Yeah, you're kinda lost." I said, "but that's my neighborhood. I can literally draw you a map if you've got something to write on."

He shut off his engine and got off the motorcycle. He dug into his pocket and produced a stubby pencil and a give-away menu from La Migliore Pizza in Città! that was all folded up. He handed them to me where I sat.

"Did you eat here?" I said. I unfolded the menu and turned it over to the blank back side "They make great pizza and their delivery boy is a girl."

"That doesn't make any sense at all." Critter said, giggling.

"Why can't a girl deliver pizza?" Spence said.

"Her name is Sofia and she has a motorcycle just like that." Critter said, pointing to the motorcycle the boy had been riding. "And she does deliver pizza."

"No reason a girl can't deliver pizza." I said, starting to sketch out the map. "I was just a little surprised when I opened the door is all."

Critter giggled like a fiend. I blushed and forced myself to concentrate on drawing a good map.

"There's gotta be a story there." Spence said.

"Yeah, but you'll need to get Chris to tell you himself. If I make him blush any more than he is, his face will start bleeding."

While I was drawing the map, the kid introduced himself.

"My name's Daffy." he said, extending a hand. "And no, I'm not named after the duck. Daffyd is the Welsh version of David. Daffy is just like Davy, only with different letters in the middle."

"I'm Spence. Short for Spencer."

"I'm Critter. My real name is Chris, but since it's confusing with two of us, I have a nickname."

A few minutes later, I had finished the map. I stood and handed it to him. He was half a head taller than me but he seemed kind of skinny. As I explained the map to him, I noticed he had a little bit of body odor. I didn't say anything about it though, I didn't want to embarrass him. He seemed to understand the map really well. I wasn't sure if it was because I was that good at drawing maps or if he just had a good head for directions.

"You said you live in this neighborhood?" Daffy said, pointing at the map.

"Yeah, on that same street." I said, just a few doors down from the address you're looking for."

"That explains everything." he said. "Thanks for the map!"

He said goodbye, started his motorcycle and road off in the direction of my neighborhood.

A couple hours later, we were standing on the outside of the chain link fence that surrounded the municipal swimming pool at the park. Spence sighed. "My dad says by the end of the summer I won't be flat chested anymore."

"Do you wish you could turn into a boy?" Critter asked.

"No." Spencer said. "I like my body, I like my parts." She turned away from the fence and started walking back toward the last place we had chained up our bikes. "What I don't like is how people expect you to act. You gotta act one way if you're a boy and a different way if you're a girl."

"So you just want to be treated like a boy, not actually be one?" I said.

"I'm not exactly keen on how boys are treated either," she said, "but if I had to choose one or the other, I'd go with boy."

"What if you didn't have to choose just one or the other?" Critter said. "What if you just tell people how you want to be treated and act the way you want to."

It was a Critter moment and Spencer stopped and gave him a big squeeze. I had to join in, of course.

"I guess I have no choice but to try." Spencer said, "I'll let you know how it goes."

When we got to the bikes, Spencer said "Please come back to my house. We can go for a swim in my pool."

"We didn't bring swimsuits." I said.

"No need. My dad wants to get a bunch of candid shots of the three of us in and around the pool, so we'll all be naked anyway."

"Sounds great!" Critter said.

"We should find a pay phone on the way," I said, "so we can call the moms and let 'em know where we are."

"Don't worry about that either, your moms are already there." Spencer said.

The second photo shoot

Ms. M's car was in the driveway when we got to Spencer's house. We parked our bikes in the garage then went in through the utility room.

"I'm home dad." Spencer yelled. "I brought the Critter and the Chris back like you said."

The moms and Mr. B were sitting at the kitchen table with some paperwork laid out in front of them. The moms each had part of a glass of white wine in front of them.

"Excellent!" Mr. B said, "Boys, I hope you do not mind doing another photo shoot so soon."

"Where's Lisa and Mikey and Donny?" I said.

"Lisa and Molly are babysitting Donny and Mikey at my house." Ms. M said.

"They seemed eager." My mom added. "I guess they saw how much money you boys were earning doing chores and they wanted a piece of the action."

A few minutes later, out by the pool, Mr. B was explaining his plans for the shoot.

"For candid shots," he said, "you will do best to consider me invisible. It may seem unnatural at first, but after a while you should be able to mentally erase me and just go about swimming and playing as if you were alone at the pool."

"Yes sir." Critter and me said. Spencer just nodded.

"I would like to get some shots of you disrobing," he said "so as strange as it may seem, please put your shirts back on before we get started. Oh, and Spencer, please go get a key and a shoelace to put around your neck as the boys are wearing theirs."

Spencer went inside to take care of that.

"I don't understand about the keys." my mom said. "With them snugged up so close under your chin, how do you use them. I would think you'd need some slack in the shoelace to either get it over your head or get the key into the lock."

"This isn't even our key." I said, giving the key at my throat a little flick. "This key is Critter's."

"And this is Chris's" Critter said.

"They're wearing each other's rings." Ms. M said. "Isn't it adorable?"

Just then Spencer came back and we helped her get her key tied up close like ours. Mr. B got his camera loaded and adjusted for shooting in daylight. He looked up and nodded to Spencer.

"Last one in is a rotten egg!" Spencer said and she began stripping her clothes as fast as she could.

It caught Critter and me by surprise, so she had a head start. We were all wearing the same thing. Shorts and a t-shirt, shoes and tall tube socks, and plain white cotton briefs. Spencer hit the water first with Critter and me not far behind, tied for second so there was no rotten egg.

I held back a little at first, wanting to let Spencer take the lead. I had spent the whole morning with the boy "Spence" but now that we were all naked, I was a little nervous. I didn't know quite how to act and Spencer was definitely a girl, even if she was still (barely) at an age where I had to look right between her legs to be sure.

Holding back was a mistake. Mr. B had not been exaggerating when he described his Spencer as a "ferocious tomboy." Things got rowdy, fast! We were every bit as wild as that first skinny dipping session at Grandpa Winchester's pool, only there were three of us this time. Spencer had an inch of height and ten pounds of weight on me and she was not afraid to use it. There was no girly-ness in Spencer's roughhousing. I had to fight back hard to keep from being dominated. It was glorious!

Spencer did hold back a little with Critter, basically the same way I did. No condescension, but made him earn every victory.

A half hour of that and we were winded. The three of us climbed out and sprawled on the bare concrete, chests heaving. At some point, one of the moms tossed us some towels and we spread those under us, sharing two beach towels among our three young bodies.

Ten minutes of rest and we were ready to go at it again, albeit a bit more reserved in terms of total wildness.

Round two was more playful and less competitive. I put my hands on Critter's boy bits and of course he did mine also. But we also both put our hands between Spencer's legs, feeling for the parts that weren't there, according to our boyish understanding. Spencer was a good sport about it, letting Critter and me explore for several minutes before she led the dash back to the water. Critter and me both had boners.

"That's a wrap!" Mr. B said. "Thanks so much vous les enfantés for your gracious participation. You are free to entertain each other as you please for the rest of the afternoon. We grownups will try to manage a ménage à trois, we do not wish to be disturbed unless the house catches fire.