Date: Fri, 24 Sep 2004 15:04:20 -0700 From: Timothy Stillman Subject: y/f bi "Twatney Sue and the Joel Bleep Get Their Groove On" "Twatney Sue and the Joel Bleep Get Their Groove On" by Timothy Stillman Twatney Sue was a real humdinger. Real hummable too. Not to mention humble. Not that she was pretty by any means, and she had tried any means at her disposal to remedy that situation. For she was, alas, very plain, though she was a lass, and she could and did hum. Hummed like a sonofagun. Man, if her hums were horses they would crowd everybody else off the planet. Good thing hums aren't horses. For it would kill the whole meaning of "The Misfits." Among other things. She hummed when she tap danced, and she tap danced the hell out of her tap shoes. She had two dozen pair of them, all shiny and sparkly they were. Everywhere she went, she carried her little wooden board, which she would throw down to the ground or concrete or wherever at the drop of a god no not again, and just tap dance her little heart out on it. She always wore tap shoes, even to school, the tap shoes she wore, and the dancing board she carried. Who knew when math class would get so impossibly rancid with dullness that she might have to wake up the kids and the teacher to a good old hoof show routine? She was in love with two people. Sandra the sulky. And Joel the bleep. Sandra the sulky would not give Twatney Sue the time of day, which didn't really matter that much, because Twatney wore a Sylvester and Tweety watch with such a cute drawing on the yellow circle of frozen pursuit and pursued that the time mechanisms went round on. Joel the bleep did give her the time of day. Joel the bleep gave her other things as well. Like his little dickiepoo. Which is what Twatney Sue and Joel the bleep called it. Because these were the days of the Saturday morning humongous TV hit "H.R. Pufnstuf" and every boy under the age of 13 wanted to be with Jimmy, and show him things that damned dragon and witchiepoo never the hell heard of. At least that was how Joel the bleep looked at it. He could not find any other boys who followed his heart on that score. For Joel the bleep could not score. Not drugs. Not boys. Not a beer. Not the time of day. Only Twatney Sue would give him the time of day, though that didn't matter to Joel the bleep, because he had an Aquaman and Aqualad watch on which the dynamic waterlogged team swam perpetually on the blue circle with the time elements on it, swimming always and getting no where. Which was pretty much the territory that Joel the bleep was in--nowhere. Of course, Joel the bleep, in being so attracted to boys, especially Jack the Back Room Mama, and following, in order, Johnny and Spitmobile--so named because he could spit from one end of the school corridor to another, and it was a damned long corridor--though the teachers frowned on his spitting, especially when he zinged one at them occasionally, so he had to corral himself from early school morning to late school afternoon before he could relatively safely perform this prodigious feat; when the school day was before beginning, or the school day was ending. Which was more entertaining to the students at Rugville Middle School that Twatney Sue's tap dancing. They found her extremely annoying actually. Sandra the Sulky (who laughed and called Twatney Sue names and made sure Sandra's friends did likewise) didn't give a whip in hell about Twatney Sue because Twatney Sue was plain and conceited and the contests were rigged anyway, that was so painfully obvious--to Sandra, Twats looked like someone had once thrown a meringue pie at her face and it had congealed there, till you realized it was just her flesh--and Sandra the Sulky wouldn't be seen within twelve miles of her if school did not prevent that. Though Sandra the Sulky was a lesbian, she was very very pretty, with golden hair, as opposed to Twatney's streaming mane of not quite brown and not quite black hair--looked like a big glob of melted chocolate. Sandra the Sulky would crook her finger at a girl and the lucky lucky girl would come, in all senses of the word. Sandra the Sulky never crooked her finger at Twatney Sue, but Twatney came anyway. Soooo, Twatney Sue had to settle for Joel the bleep who was thin and mousy and looked like Troy Donahue had tumbled off a wedding cake in the fifties and had fallen off a great deal looking for that cake to climb back onto, and it seemed his face had melted wrong and he had stultified at age 13. In other words, he didn't look like Troy Donahue one bit. And he didn't mind Twatney Sue hummed. At least he pretended he didn't. For Twatney Sue, you may recall, was a humdinger. Both a hum. As well as a dinger. She hummed when she tap danced. She hummed when she sat in class. She hummed going to sleep. And she hummed when she played with Joel the bleep's dickiepoo. Sometimes, Twatney Sue, thinking all the while of Sandra the Sulky and her glorious bedroom eyes, let Joel the bleep get inside her, while Joel the bleep was thinking of Jack the Back Room Mama, and while in this odd human coupling, odder still that their brains were in an even odder coupling, Twatney Sue hummed. She hummed "Rule Britannia" and "Roll Out the Barrel" and she hummed songs from "H.R. Pufnstuf" to keep Joel the bleep amused. God, Jack Wild was hotttttttttt! Was Twatney Sue aware that she hummed all the time? During even the lurid act of intercourse? Who is to say? However, when she hummed, and Joel called out the name of Jack the Back Room Mama, and Twatney pretended that she was humming for Sandra the Sulky who had somehow grown a dickiepoo, such as it was, and was dickeying her round the room of pink in connubial bliss, they would each pretend each called out the other's names though of course it would have killed the whole thing dead with a stick if they had admitted they were not calling out Joel and Twatney, but the names of their dream lovers. Which was certainly not the case, at all. And yet-- Joel the bleep loved Twatney Sue. And Twatney Sue loved Joel the bleep. And it was all real messed up. In their fashion, they were a team. Sometimes Twatney Sue tap danced on her wood board for Joel the bleep. She danced naked of course, so her budding little titty muffins would bounce a bit up and down, and Joel the bleep pretended that she was Jack the Back Room Mama, and could almost imagine Twatney Sue had a penis there between her legs instead of a slit the shape of a little moon like you used to find on outhouse doors. And she was boyish looking if you wanted to know the truth. So she had that on her side, as far as Joel the bleep was concerned. And Joel the bleep was kind of girly looking with his delicate face and curvy body and long blond hair, (in your dreams, Bleepboy) if you just didn't look at the less than the run of the mill bland face that told you nothing and sent you not to the moon or the North pole or anywhere like it. His lips were too big too. So she pretended, not looking at his penis or his face, that he was Sandra the Sulky because Sandra the Sulky looked like the creamiest dishiest girl in the whole wide world or at least in this little fraction of a part of it. Sometimes Joel the bleep danced in Twatney Sue's tap shoes, red and shiny and glittery, his tiny feet fit, which made him oddly proud for some reason. He was naked, of course, and she would sit on her bed and watch him and he would get the cutest little hard on you ever saw and she would be delighted with it in spite of herself, clap her hands, as she would and giggle and hum louder than ever. He danced to all the "H.R. Pufnstuf" songs from the 45 record he had bought that had all of the songs on it. He pretended to sing in a British accent like Jack Wild and she couldn't hurt Joel the bleep's feelings and tell him he hadn't quite achieved the knack of it. He especially liked to sing "I'm a Mechanical Boy" and move stiff like a robot while she held on to his hoppy stiffy dickiepoo. But his little hips kinda bobbled instead of hopped when he danced like a clumsy calf trying to figure out the new day it had been born into, and was just so damned lost in it all that Twatney Sue was won over nevertheless; she being a top professional at it, after all. What a mercy hump she was. She was also an expert baton twirler and beauty queen--she made up for her lack of beauty, by winning them over with chutzpah and that BY DAMN I'M GREAT `tude and IF YOU DON'T BELIEVE IT I'LL FUCKIN' WELL RIP YOUR LUNGS OUT (the fear always of the judges and her critics that she just damn well might; tiny little girlie hands had done far far worse in history) and her sheer drive at the whole thing and playing on the underdog ( not the cartoon character of the same name, voiced by the great Wally Cox who has nothing to do with any of this) in that mock humble "take this you bastards" Oral Roberts style, HA-EAL--like nobody's business-- and just annoying the hell out of the judges who would crown her anything, in all meanings of the phrase, just to get the hell rid of her and that nasally screeching voice--she sang songs from "Lionel Bart's Oliver!" (dressed as Oliver Twist of course, the regulation workhouse clothes)--don't knock it--she was no Mark Lester, but truth to tell she did look kinda kicky--though don't ask how she raped killed and buried "Where Is Love?"--she had won fifteen beauty pageants with this routine, and true, her signature closure (hail glory) version of "Consider Yourself" (or else BUSTER CHERRY!!!) when twirling a baton on fire at both ends just bitch slapped the judges silly. Though it did not have that effect on the pretty girls who lost. Mostly they wanted to kill her. Including Sandra the Sulky. To which, all the while, loving her, Twatney Sue thought stick it in your shorts and puff on it, as she time and again won the huge trophy of plated silver and gold that almost made her keel over backwards carrying the damn thing off the stage in all that gilded tattery of child beauty pageants that were always so cheap and tawdry looking, local, regional, national, kind of made her want to barf. But as the killing eyes of the losers masticated her in their pupils, especially Sandra the Sulky's eyes, she flipped her long chocolate mousse hair back over her shoulder, smiled her pearly whites hugely, waved at the audience and those precious judges, and trundled off with the trophy a few feet taller than she, and she at the time, walking on air. How she wanted to celebrate with Sandra the Sulky the win the win the win. But of course that was impossible because Sandra the Sulky just hated her more and more each time and was now actively plotting to kill her. There was a definite self-destructive quality to Twatney Sue. And sometimes she took it out on Joel the bleep. Twatney Sue's parents were rich and stupid, and let Joel the bleep stay for hours, unmolested (hehe), in Twatney Sue's bedroom of pink and blue and huge blow up photos of flash in the pan movie hunks, glued on the walls, and the satin Pooh dolls on the bed, and the Raggedy Anns and Andys, and the Barbie Dolls and the whole mish mash and pink pillows that had images of Leif Garrett's snuggled in sleepy time pink and fuzzy wuzzy face before he grew too old to be dreamed about and his mouth grew so big it looked like it was trying to eat said face, the usual girl room schmeer, because they could not not indulge their daughter in whatever she wanted. Mom was a stage mother. Mom was a failed glam girl who had never been a glam and was no longer a girl. Mom had been entering her daughter in beauty pageants since Twatney was a baby. For all the tired old reasons. Right now, though, Joel the bleep was entering Twatney Sue, and was thinking of Jack the Back Room Mama who looked like Jack Wild who reminded Joel the bleep of Mark Lester who was even prettier than Jack Wild ( to reiterate--both these boys from "Lionel Bart's Oliver!"--Dodger and Oliver Twist, respectively), so sometimes in mid hum of "Who Will Buy?" she reserved for only when Joel the bleep fucked her, (how nice, Mom and Dad thought, hearing her singing to her oh so cute little boy friend, which made them smile, while Dad read the paper in the living room, and Mom baked brownies in the kitchen) which of course gave him much impetus to fuck her, which just made Joel the bleep go like a piston steam engine and super tickle her vagina like a cherry had been put on Sandra the Sulky's tongue tip and it was be bop time in girl tongue in twatville all the way, with Joel the Bleep himself a million miles away. Shhh...secret And Twatney Sue a billion miles away. Shh....secret. Twatney Sue was something of a drudge inside. She was not particularly imaginative. She was in ways a war-horse like her failed stage struck mother before her. She knew Joel was a boy and was not Sandra the Sulky. She tried her best to forget that he was a boy, to become as lost in her dream world, as was Joel the bleep in his. But she failed more and more. And she knew without doubt that she would be stuck with Joel the bleep, and she would not be able to get one girl thought out of her about him, would not be able to paste the pasties and remove the dick from him in her mind. He would hold her as she sang "As Long as He Needs Me" and he would cry on her little boy tits that were becoming girl tits. She tried to Joel her way to greatness. Some of her somehow was being deposited in Joel the Bleep for some reason, she was beginning to sense, though it made no sense. She tried to see in her world something that was better than Twatney Sue, because there was the rub. Twatney Sue loved Twatney Sue and Twatney Sue could not figure out why Sandra the Sulky did not love Twatney Sue too. She knew why Joel the bleep loved her, because--in addition to how could he not?-- Joel the bleep desperately wanted not to be gay, and really wasn't, for she had changed him--how could she not?-- hocus pocus, and he was just ashamed and shy around her, so he was hiding in a fantasy that had nothing to do with himself at all. And of course everything to do with her. If the show biz thing fell through--silly idea--she planned on being a psychologist and getting paid to say such fucked up things like this. And listen to idiots in the audience, helped along by the sweetener machine, applaud and laugh wildly at the supreme every day simple and profound why didn't I think of that? insight. Had Joel the bleep heard this, or figured it out, he would have told her she was full of beans. And what the hell you talkin' about, Willis? Twatney Sue knew she just sent Joel the Bleep to walking on air, (oh how unselfish she was, oh how giving she was) dreaming his dream, and his dream was the outfit she wore, the torn denim shirt, the torn dungarees, the bare feet, the waif of it all, the sweet high sad voice, the tender eyes directed heavenward--oh god don't let me be lonely a minute more--oh how he had wanted to rub his dickiepoo on her shirt (and later on, miracle of miracles, did) when she was wearing it and pretend that she was Jack the Back Room Mama who was Jack Wild who was Mark Lester who was Leif Garrett who was Bjorn Andresson who was Tommy Rettig who was Jon Provost who was the little boy in "Walkabout" who had such a dick on him that Joel the Bleep almost fell down to his knees in the theatre and worshipped him......and in this he was lost. He was the Carnation Cow on the sides of the milk container holding a container of Carnation Milk, looking into the picture on it of the Carnation Cow holding a Carnation Milk container, looking into it, and so forth. Twatney Sue held to the bumpy bone back of Joel the Bleep which was not bonny at all, and scrunched her fingers into his already too scrunchy butt, as she sang and sang and hummed and hummed--the humming in truth was getting to Joel the bleep a little more than ever and he wished she would kind of can it--her singing voice just got him wiggling all over the place however--pretend enough and it is so--and he pressed into her and pretended that he was pressing into all the boys he would never have; most of whom would envy him that he was getting any at all, he just knew that he knew, even if it was with old Lemon Meringue face. So anyway he came in her and she oohed and aahed and pretended like mad she was looking not into the dull blue eyes of Joel the bleep but into the smoky bar room mirror gray eyes of Sandra the Sulky, but the eyes of Joel the bleep kept staring right at her--just didn't seem to have a brain back there in his shoe box head, and his eyes were crossed at the moment of sex happy boy. they lay there and sweated. There is not much to be said for sweating. It was kind of like, Twatney Sue thought, sex glue. And she forgot faking an orgasm, so immediately remedied that with whispery groans of delight and holding her legs tightly round the still trembling boy. She had never had an orgasm in her little sexual years. She did not want one. It would have been a sign of weakness. Her mother warned her against it. It meant having fun. That's something I forgot to mention before. Twatney Sue was taught never to ever have fun. Cause if you have even a little bit of fun, God's gonna getcha. Her mother, a sanguine, bitter woman who was married to a Jew ("get a Jew husband, you'll be set monetarily for life, and when he goes out and gets someone on the side, you'll be double blessed, free of that eternal stink of matzo balls in the bedroom, during and after the three seconds of pure flight to the moon on gossamer wings, before he turns over, farts, and starts snoring--anyway, here, I've got new taps on your shoes, let's try them out now. Oh yeah, fake the orgasm, so you can lord it over him and he'll never know though of course he will know and it will work on him and it will corkscrew his guts out a little at a time because his ego is as big as all outdoors and it will put him in an early grave.") Did I say bitter? Master of understatement. Mom and her daughter were still counting on the early grave theory, so they could spend all the jewelry store chain (Daddy was OF COURSE RICH) money the way they wanted--new clothes, new house, new lives, new personalities, face lifts all, tummy tucks, etc. As if they couldn't already. Dad however, being a momser, still was hanging on. But by a very slender thread. If there was ever a candidate for a heart attack, he would be at the top of the list. Anyway there was Joel the bleep lying atop Twatney Sue and she was rippling with O's that sounded a little like laughter, and this disturbed Joel the bleep one great mighty deal because he thought he was being at his most romantic, because that was what Joel the bleep thought of himself-- --really romantic, really sexy though only Twatney Sue saw that side of him yet, but someday someday Jack the Back Room Mama would have his tongue hanging out, be down on his knees, saying Joel the bleep, let me suck you please. But why kid a kidder? Joel the bleep would have to stay with Twatney Sue the rest of the blue moon life of the boy, because he did love her. In his fashion. She loved him in her fashion. A very weird series of Butternut pattern cuts made these bizarre fashions. That probably would never go out of fashion. `Cause none of this really when you get down to it is that unusual. Blame the celestial sewing machine's odd sense of humor for it, I guess. Though why she wanted him to be straight, she had no idea. Her little popinjay head ached when she thought about that. But now he rolled off of Twatney Sue and she immediately grabbed onto his dickiepoo and tried to ameliorate her laughter inside--he wasn't that stupid--he could pick up on more than she maybe thought..then thought, oh come on, get real now. She bopped to her bedside table, got the new Teen Beat mags, settled back on her soggy bed with the still hard boy, curled up next to him in a pretty sexy pose actually, and helped him jack off to those pics, and, in her secret self (one of many she had not known of before and thought if those secret selves don't stop, they'll dig a hole to China for me to fall into) in the process of that, was as of late, discovering she honestly did like to lie naked with him, while he played with her tits and cunt, he had very active and artistic fingers she was discovering, and stroke his dickiepoo which, since boys have one, unless they are in there somewhere among the ranks known as "God's special children," and if you at least got to go to bed with what was technically a boy, goy he may be, who was just starting to be ruled by his hormones and was just goofy as hell anyway, then this was a nice looking little penis to hold and kiss and sometimes-oh please please please Twatney Sue--suck on; in short-ahem- you could find worse little lolly sticks than that proud little member of the Joel the bleep club. It was foreskin challenged. She liked that the best. It was a kind of rebellion for her. From what little she knew about it. And in the process of doing that, she found her thoughts would not turn even one whit to Sandra the Sulky, not even the common fancy of hers, as best she could devise it, of Sandra the Sulky being with them and making love to Joel the bleep, while Twatney Sue supervised as she made love to Sandra the Sulky and Joel the bleep taught them both how to suck cock-- --but there had come into the tap dancing fool's reverie something known as jealousy, and though that was a long way down to the glittering jewelry pike known as love (in a beginning roundabout odd way), still she had gotten to love more than oh well bring the old dish rag in, because he's the only one who will give me the time of day; Joel, love, as in miss him when he wasn't around; love, as more than a play love; more than an invented little game to while away time and use him to thumb her hairless little twat at her parents who were so dumb she didn't even have to lock her bedroom door, especially when she had her little cupcake friend, Joel the bleep, over; they would not ever venture in her space to see what the two little brainless sexless moppets were up to, without there little superstar lambkins' permission, dumdedumdum. Oh the sperm and cut juice that was spent on their daughter's bed, and when Mommykins' maid washed the sheets and there were these tell tale signs on the Percale, well, she knew to keep her mouth shut, knowing what side of the check her bread was buttered on. And now Joel the bleep was sulking even as Twatney Sue rubbed his dickiepoo, even as she told him she had a dream last night that he was sucking Mark Lester, and Leif Garrett ran off crying because he was so in love with Joel the bleep who would not give him the time of day, not that it mattered because in those years Leif had lots of money, and could buy all the time of day he wanted with all that money, or at least his mom and his agent did; later Leif would wear a bandanna on his head so no one would guess he was losing his hair, would have that massively over grown mouth, and would admit he had a drug problem, but it all would work out okay, because his mother would be quoted in a newspaper article that her son was on the straight and narrow and was keeping clean, hanging round with friends like Marilyn Manson who helped him stay out of trouble (honest--Twatney Sue's mother could take lessons) and none of that for sure made up for the money and the drugs and the girls of the glory years. Joel the Bleep came a little in her mouth. She swirled the cum in her mouth, liked the taste, and happily swallowed it. And they held each other for a time. But Joel the bleep was sulking a little. Twatney Sue wanted to ask if he would like to dress up as Oliver Twist and she could play the Dodger, and she could pickpocket his penis while he tried not to notice, for that was a game he had always liked. Or would he dress up like her as a girl and he could have a little surprise waiting for her unsuspecting eyes, inside his pastel ruffled panties? No go to both those suggestions. And Twatney Sue had a momentary pang in her brain that showed her a certain species of disappointment if she could pull down Sandra the Sulky's panties and find no cock therein. Not just any cock. Joel the bleep's cock. Well, they never tell you how complicated life is, even for children. What the hell is wrong with me? What was wrong with her was Joel the bleep. What was wrong with both of them was life is one big fuckin' practical joke and you gotta know when to laugh and when to fake like it all makes sense. Especially to fake it to the point where you think faking it means it's real, and real means it's not, or something. Such is the nature of what we laughingly call reality. And you wonder why psychiatrists take nose dives out of their office windows on top floors? Though for my money, not nearly enough do this. Joel the bleep, however, still and all, very much wanted to snuggle up against all the boys in question, far more than he wanted to snuggle up to Twatney Sue, and he would have been very perturbed if any boy in question did not have a dick for him to play with. And yet, Joel the bleep had grown accustomed to Twatney Sue, somewhat like his parents had grown accustomed to each other, and like Twatney Sue's parents had grown accustomed to each other--in other words, a grudge match just waiting to happen, but still it gives you something to come home to. Unlike their parents, Joel the bleep and Twatney Sue still liked each other--and who knows about tomorrow?-- it's a card game, cut and deal and cheat if you have to, but live with it mostly-- --well, that word love is twirled around like a baton on fire at both ends; most get burned by it, and it's stupid, and doesn't mean a lot, except in TV bubble babble, and unless you're an idiot you know damn well what you are walking into, but we just pretend we can this time escape the burn part, and "it's love land for me and my gal." Notice how often the word "pretend" crops up in this sad little chronicle? You got the goods next to you. And you're still pretending like you are alone. Go figure. `Cause when you come right down to us, all of us are really really stupid about things like this. Burning bright candles have more mercy for moths than love for us. For moths, one phffftt and it's over at least. So Joel the bleep sulked. Even as Twatney Sue started sucking him again (god was this kid hard ALL THE TIME?) and he pretended it was Jack Wild playing his dickiepoo like Freddie the Flute, and finally Joel the bleep got into the swing of it, or his rioting hormonal body did, and boy and girl still pretending they were other than what was there and now happening, coaxed some fun out of it. After a while, Twatney Sue tap danced a little more for him. Naked. And he clumsily bare foot tap danced a little for her. Naked. They each saw whoever they saw in each other. And the whole thing, even silly as it was, was frighteningly normal. If you go by what you see around you. Thank god for the movies, Teen Beat, and the other teen mags before they started chickening out, wall posters, and imagination and utter desperation, coupled with a supreme ability not to laugh at the silliness of it all. And little boys and little girls who lie on beds of pink and cum and cunt juice and Pooh bears and Raggedy Ann and Andy dolls, who hold each other tightly, try to figure out what skin is for, and attempt to keep each other company, safe and secure, in this sad big bad lonely world known as Earth that just keeps floating around like it is there for a reason and means something. It just has to, after all. Doesn't it? the livin' end Timothy Stillman comewinter@earthlink.net