Hi again.
This is Chapter 8 of my story about a lonely boy who discovers that family can be where you find it. If you haven't read the previous chapters they are in my story archive here.
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"Your mother and I have made great progress, Fin."
"That's great, Dr. A!"
To me she was "Dr. A" only when we were in this office and "Mrs. A" everywhere else.
"Yes it is great," she said, smiling fondly at my Mom. "She's been extraordinarily open and honest in our sessions, and very dedicated to getting better. This is the only way I can help a person, so I hope you will be honest with me too when we begin our private sessions."
"I will, Dr. A," I solemnly said.
"Good. Now Fin, your Mom has a lot of guilt weighing her down, some of which is about you. It's important for her to get these things off her chest but it might not be easy for you to hear. Do you think you can handle it?"
"Will it help her get better?"
"I don't think she can get better without it."
"OK then," I said. "I'll do anything to help her."
Mom gave me an amazed and admiring look, then turned to Dr. A.
"See what I mean?" she asked, tears welling up. "After all the hell I've put him through he still wants to help me."
"We all want to help you, Kate," Dr. A said, "but Fin more than anyone. He loves you."
Mom blushed pink and looked down to her lap, where she picked at the side of her thumb like I'd seen her do a few times after bad arguments with Dad.
"I don't know if I can tell him," she said, barely audibly.
"You must," Dr. A calmly said. "We've discussed this. You need to for your own benefit, but more importantly Fin needs to hear the truth so he can begin processing it, and he needs to hear it from you. You owe it to him."
Mom still didn't look up. "I know," she said. "I need a minute. Can I have a minute?"
"OK," Dr. A said. "One minute, and I'm watching the clock."
I'd never seen my Mom this way. She seemed scared of me! I'd spent my whole life scared of her — not of hitting me or anything but just going off over any one of a thousand different triggers. It was like working for the Bomb Squad: one wrong move and BOOM! I couldn't imagine what she was working up the nerve to say.
"Kate?" Dr. A prompted when the one-minute reprieve expired.
"OK," Mom said. "I'll do it. Right now."
Ten seconds of silence.
"OK," she repeated, but this time she raised her head and looked at me. What I saw in her eyes was mainly regret.
"First," she began, "I honestly do love you, Fin. Maybe sometimes it doesn't seem like it but I really do. And I wanted to be a good mother and I tried really hard but..."
I recognized her getting revved up the way I'd seen too many times before. I usually ended up getting punished when this happened and so my own anxiety began to rise.
"I don't fail at things!" she blurted. "I was good at school, good at sports, guys liked me, I'm a star at work! I don't understand why I can't do this!"
She was getting more agitated as she went on.
"Oh, I could handle the easy stuff, the cooking and cleaning, buying you clothes and taking you to school and the dentist. What I couldn't seem to do was connect with you and really be your Mom!"
She began to pant, struggling to breathe.
"Cleansing breath, Kate," Dr. A said, and Mom immediately straightened in her chair, closed her eyes and pulled in a deep breath through her nose. She held it for several seconds and then let it out very slowly, her lips forming an "O" like that guy I saw once blowing smoke rings from a cigar. She emptied her lungs completely and then took a normal breath. It really seemed to calm her down.
"That's good, Kate," Dr. A said. "And now you can focus, yes?"
Mom smiled in embarrassment. "Yes, thank you, Doctor."
"Perhaps you should get to the real heart of the matter," Dr. A urged. "The sooner you tell him the better."
"Yes," Mom muttered. "I know."
She stalled another few seconds but finally looked me directly in the eye.
"There's a thing people talk about called the maternal instinct," she said. "Having a kid is supposed to fulfill you as a woman, and when you have one you automatically know how to care for him and love him and connect with him in a special, magical way that bonds you both together forever."
She fidgeted a second and Dr. A seemed about to prompt her again.
"The problem is I never really felt like that. When I was little I didn't play with dolls and pretend they were my babies. All the other girls talked about someday having husbands and kids and the whole world acted like that was the normal way to be. Deep down I was scared that there was something wrong with me because I didn't feel like that but I hoped that someday the instinct would kick in.
"When I found out I was pregnant I kind of talked myself into being happy about it even though I really wasn't. Your Dad didn't want to get married but he loved me and I convinced him that the baby — you, Fin — would make it perfect; that you'd be the glue that would hold together our happy little family. And so he married me."
She turned to Dr. A and asked, "May I have a bottle of water? My mouth is so dry."
"Are you stalling again, Kate?"
She hesitated. "Maybe. OK, never mind the water." She turned back to me and fixed me with pain in her eyes.
"But that's not how it worked, Fin. The maternal instinct isn't real, at least not for me. We got married and you came along and all I felt was scared and angry. I was going to have a big career and a glamorous life in the world of art. Being a Mom ruined all that and I got very depressed."
She paused and looked to Dr. A, who smiled and nodded encouragement. Mom turned back to me.
"Fin, the fact is I never really wanted children. Getting pregnant was a mistake, a drunken mistake, and every time I changed your diaper or fed you strained peas it reminded me of how stupid I was and how I threw my life away. I hated you just for being born and I hated your Dad for getting me pregnant and then I hated myself for being so irrational about it. I've been miserable for ten years and I've treated you horribly, as if it was your fault somehow, and that made me feel incredibly guilty. I cannot go on like this Fin, or I'll go crazy!"
Dr. A gave her a mildly reproachful look.
"I know, I know!" Mom backpedaled. "We don't say crazy. Or nuts or bonkers or whacko. But that's what I'll be, Fin, and if I keep on this way I'll make you just as crazy as I am. I need to fix this for both of us!"
It was a lot to take in but it actually meshed perfectly with how I had perceived my mother since I'd been old enough to understand. I had known for a long time that my Dad wished I'd never been born but somehow, despite the evidence of my own eyes, I'd always assumed that my Mom actually wanted me. Moms want their babies, right?
I guess I fell for the myth of maternal instinct too. My eyes were misty but somehow I didn't cry.
"So how do we fix it, Mom?"
She visibly winced when I said the word "Mom." She looked down at her lap again and when it became clear she wasn't going to answer Dr. A jumped in.
"Fin, your Mom and I have made remarkable progress in a short time but I think we've gone as far as one-to-one talk therapy can go. She needs to advance to a more intensive phase of her treatment, which is best done in a residential facility."
"Residential?" I warily asked. "You mean she's going to live there?"
"Only for a while," Dr. A said. "She'll be staying in a lovely spa, like a cabin in the woods, with a number of other patients who need to figure some things out. It's a place without distractions where she can learn from the experiences of other women who are dealing with similar issues. It's called group therapy."
I timidly looked at Mom. "When are you coming back?"
"It's a six-week program, Fin," Dr. A answered for her. "With luck and hard work she'll come back home with a new attitude and a clearer idea of how the two of you can move forward."
I could hardly get out my next words.
"Where will I go?"
"You'll stay here, Fin," Dr. A continued with a fond smile. "Your Mom and Dad have both agreed to give Mr. A and myself temporary guardianship. A judge has to approve, which she will because she happens to be an old friend of mine, then we will be your legal guardians while your Mom's away."
"You mean you'll be my parents?"
"Guardians, but yes," she said. "We'll have full legal authority to act on behalf of your parents. The law calls it in loco parentis."
"Because your parents are loco," Mom threw in, but she gave a wry smile to show that she was joking and somehow it made me feel better.
Because I would live with the Arvidssons for the entire rest of the summer Mrs. A decided that instead of having three boys crowded in together I should have my own bedroom. To "ease the transition" they took all the furniture out of their guest room and moved over every single thing from my room at home. My bed, my desk, my dresser, my TV... everything was set up exactly as it had been at our house except I no longer had a private bathroom. I have to admit it was very comforting to have my sanctuary again, though without my parents around I didn't really need a place to hide.
Ronnie was just as happy as I was because they took out her youth bed and replaced it with the king-size that had been in the guest room, so that when Mr. A's parents came to visit from Sweden they could use her room in comfort. For those two weeks Ronnie would move in with Hawley and Veed would share my room.
Which sounded pretty darn good to me.
Ronnie rolled around on her big new bed, naked of course, and ended up on her back spread-eagle. She caught my eye with a naughty glint.
"There's plenty of room for visitors Fin, any time you want."
I was getting used to her innuendo and I just smiled.
Two days later Mom left for her retreat. She said they called it a "retreat" because it sounded better than "loony bin." Mrs. A didn't like that joke very much but she explained how Mom uses dark humor to disguise her profound feelings of failure, and again I felt sorry for her.
I had said my goodbyes already because Mom didn't want an emotional scene in the driveway, so now I watched from my new bedroom window. Residents weren't allowed to have cars at Transcendence so Mrs. A was driving Mom there. A tear or two ran down my cheeks as I watched them pull away.
"Don't worry, Fin," Veed said and put an arm around my naked shoulder. His touch was warm and comforting. "She'll be all right."
Yeah, I thought. But will I?
"Hey," Ronnie piped in, "I know what will cheer you up. Let's go play in the backyard — naked!"
"Oh boy!" Hawley cried and hurried down the stairs followed by Ronnie more slowly. Veed grinned.
"You're going to love being out there with the warm sun and the breeze on your body," he said. "Papa walked all around, even up by the highway, and he says nobody can see because of the trees and the fence."
I sheepishly smiled. "It sounds great," I said, "but I'm a little scared."
"It's OK, Fin," he said. "Once you get out there and start playing in five minutes you'll forget that you're naked." He gave me a playful look and added, "But I won't forget that you're naked. Va-va-voom!"
I burst out with a guffaw. "Va-va-voom? What does that mean?"
"Some guy said it about a sexy girl in an old movie," Veed laughed along with me. Then he put his lips to my ear and whispered, "It means you give me a boner!"
I looked down and, sure enough, there it was.
"Va-va-voom!" I said and we laughed again.
Veed pushed open the kitchen door to the backyard. There was Ronnie turning a perfect naked cartwheel. Beyond her Hawley ran across the lawn waving his arms and yelling like a lunatic just for fun. He turned and ran back toward us and I watched his sweet little cock and balls jauntily bounce. Both kids seemed as happy as I'd ever seen them.
Veed stepped out into the sun, the bright light bringing that wonderful radiance to his flawless skin. He sensed that I was not following and turned back.
"What's the matter, Fin?"
My eyes fixed on his burgeoning erection, pinkish-alabaster in the full sunshine and casting a stark shadow across his thigh like a sundial.
Looked like about two o'clock.
"C'mon Fin," he urged. "It's really fun, you'll see."
I hesitated. "I've got a better idea. Why don't we go upstairs first and play in my bed for the first time? Wouldn't that be cool?"
Veed smiled. "Yeah, that would be cool," he said, "but there's lots of time for that and we're already out here! Come on and feel this glorious sun!"
I nervously licked my lips and scanned the treeline for Peeping Toms.
"There's nobody there," Veed insisted. "Papa said it was OK."
Still I hesitated.
"Look, we forgot to put sunscreen on so we can't stay out very long anyway. Let's just play for fifteen minutes and then we'll go upstairs and play for like an hour!"
"Well..." I stalled but Veed grabbed my hand and yanked me out the door. I panicked slightly and would have ducked back inside except Mr. A was blocking the door, and this giant man could have blocked two doors and a window.
"We must not leave the door open, boys," he said in the Dad-voice every kid knows. "The inside is not for flies and air conditioning is not for the backyard!" He firmly closed it and I was outdoors for real.
Naked.
Veed still held my hand and I found it somewhat reassuring. He pulled me out into the yard where Ronnie was practicing ballet movements like I had sometimes seen people do on TV. Hawley was squirming in the grass like a Golden Retriever with an itchy back. Veed dropped my hand and began stretching exercises like the athlete he was.
Unexpectedly Ronnie grabbed her right heel with her right hand and extended her muscular leg straight up over her head, her toes pointed skyward and both legs straight as a steel bar. It was like she was doing the splits standing up! I couldn't believe she could hold herself that way and balance so solidly on one foot. Although I wasn't really focused on it I did notice that this move opened her hairless pussy just like when she showed it to me in her bedroom. She saw me looking and grinned.
"You're gettin' to like it, aren't ya?" she said. "I knew you would someday."
My first impulse was to deny it but after all I was looking, wasn't I? I still wasn't really interested but if it was going to be right out there what was the harm of looking at it?
Veed suggested we throw a Frisbee and dispatched Hawley to the garage to fetch one. I took my place in one corner of the yard, noting how cool and tickly the grass felt under my feet. Of course I had walked barefoot in grass many times before but it was a whole new experience to also be bare-everything-else. I had an impulse to cover up but I didn't.
"Fin!" Veed shouted and launched the disc my way. It came pretty much straight to me and I managed to catch it with barely a bobble.
"Hawley!" I called and sent it in his general direction. He had to run a few steps but he caught it and grinned at me, seeming to enjoy the extra effort I made him put in. He flew the Frisbee to Ronnie who used the momentum of reaching for it to spin around once and flip it toward Veed in one fluid motion. She made the whole catch-and-throw move look graceful as hell.
It was the first chance I'd had to see Ronnie's agility and athleticism on display and I saw how she'd make a fine dancer. I might not have been horny for her but I sure was impressed.
As Veed predicted within a few minutes al fresco nudity was no longer an issue for me. Frisbee was the most fun it had ever been, possibly due to the sweet scenery that accompanied it. I was disappointed when Mr. A came striding toward us across the lawn, his long thick dick swinging all the way.
"Children!" he called. "You have forgotten your sunscreen and your shoulders are becoming pink. Now you must come inside."
"Aw!" Hawley complained. "I want to play out here!"
"If you apply sunscreen you may come back outside if you wish," Mr. A said. "I do not want you to be burned."
"It's OK Hawley," Ronnie said, ushering him toward the back door. "I'll help you with the sunscreen." Then to me she said, "It's hard to get everyplace on yourself so we help each other."
Walking with Veed back to the house I asked him, "Do you put sunscreen on your dick?"
"Of course," he said, "and my balls too. They're made of skin, right? And it really hurts if you forget because that part of you doesn't get much sun."
"What about your butthole? That's pretty sensitive too."
"Near it, but not right in it," Ronnie offered. "Same with my pussy. The sun doesn't really get in there unless you sunbathe in a really weird position!"
We laughed and trooped inside.
Ronnie helped Hawley and spent a long time slathering the stuff on his dick, resulting in a raging stiff boner. This reminded Veed and me of our earlier deal, of fifteen minutes outside and then an hour inside, so with Ronnie similarly slathered she and Hawley went out alone and Veed and I went upstairs.
We took a shower together, which was both needed and appreciated after working up a sweat playing Frisbee. It went a little faster than previous times, anxious as we were to inaugurate my bed. Just like me before I met Veed, my bed had known only masturbation.
"Pretty comfy," Veed said as he stretched out his long form, propped up on one elbow with his ankles crossed. It was an incredibly sexy pose. "I think it's bigger than my bed."
I climbed in beside him. "It's what they call full-size. I read the signs in the furniture department at the store. It goes youth — like yours — twin, full, queen and king. There's another one called California King but I don't know if you can get it in Minnesota."
Veed wasn't interested in beds from a thousand miles away. He locked his big blue eyes on mine and they drew me in like magnets. I drifted closer until we met in a quick nip of a kiss. We melted together and deeply kissed, wrapping each other in our arms and legs until we had mashed together as much skin as we possibly could. It felt like his heart was burrowing into mine straight through our chests. My dick throbbed against his stomach and I really needed to get things started but I hated to break our magic embrace.
I loved Veed so much at that moment that everything else simply went away. Insane Moms and runaway Dads didn't matter if I had him.
"I need to fuck you, Fin," he breathed. "I need to fuck you deep and hard and make you my boy forever. Can I do that, Fin? Can I fuck you harder than you've ever been fucked before?"
"I've only been fucked once before but that was pretty deep and hard."
"Not like this," Veed said with a twinkle. "My friend Anton in Sweden did me this way once and it's the deepest anybody ever got into me."
"Did you like it?"
"Yeah, man!" Veed grinned. "Anton was twelve and I was only nine but his dick wasn't too big yet and it felt great. For a long time it was the best I'd ever been fucked."
"What's the best now?"
Veed gave a sly smile. "When you did it the other day."
I melted into him again and we kissed for a long time. Finally I pulled an inch away and whispered, "Do it, Veed. Fuck me deep and hard!"
He rolled away and grabbed the pillow, placing it in the middle of the bed.
"Lie face down with the pillow under your hips," he said, "like you're going to rub off on the pillow."
We had never discussed the position but I knew what he meant. I had humped my pillow a dozen times alone in my room and it was fun, but something told me this would be a lot better.
I took the position, arranging my stone-hard boner comfortably under me. It occurred to me that we wouldn't be able to kiss and make out in this position and I was sure I would miss it. In a few seconds Veed's fingers spread my cheeks open and he began applying cool Astroglide to my welcoming hole.
There was no fear this time, only anticipation and longing. I loved Veed and I loved his cock and I wanted every single bit of it inside me.
He climbed astride my butt and hips, his knees to the outside and holding himself off of my back with his hands on the bed. One hand came to his dick to aim himself and I felt that hot, stiff poker zero in on my bullseye. His wide head stretched my elastic ring just as it had the first time but instead of having to push through resistance I simply opened myself and my lover's cockhead slipped inside.
Oh, I had missed that feeling! I had been pretty sore right after the first time but that only lasted a day or two and I was very ready to have that delicious fullness again. Veed sighed in pleasure and I moaned my appreciation.
"You OK?" he asked.
"Really good, Veed," I said and moaned again. "Oh God!"
"Arch your back a little," he said. "Angle your butt up toward me more."
I pushed my belly down to the bed and scooted my knees an inch forward. Immediately I could feel the better alignment and I knew it was time.
Veed sank his shaft into me. I felt my hole stretch and was gratified to note that it didn't hurt. In fact the stretch was a welcome feeling. I was letting my lover in to do with me as he pleased.
Veed paused and let out another sigh. I guessed he was about halfway in.
"Ready for more?" he asked.
I nodded my head, then realizing he might not see it I gasped "Yes! Give it to me, Veed!"
He sank more and more of that wonderful hard cock into me and I was astounded that there was so much more to take. I felt more and more full and the pressure inside my dick built and built until finally Veed's balls nestled against my perineum and he was all the way in.
"Auuggh!" I moaned as he pinned me to the bed with all his weight focused on my ass.
"Is it good, Finny?" he asked, inventing a nickname I wasn't sure I liked. "Is it filling you up nice and deep?"
"Oh yeah!" I managed to moan. "God I feel so full!"
"You're so tight!" he groaned. "Even more than the first time."
"And you feel bigger than the first time!" I gasped. "Oh man!"
Veed waited for several seconds and then I felt him adjusting his position. In a moment his belly and chest came down against my back. His hands moved from the bed to my shoulders with his forearms tight beside his torso against my back. His legs squirmed onto the backs of mine and then he was lying fully on top of me. We had full-body contact like when we first got into bed but this time his iron-hard four and a half inches was deeply, fully inside.
It was absolute Heaven.
Every ounce of his weight pushed me into the bed and I loved it. He felt like such a man to me even though he was only a boy. I loved his chest rising and falling against my back as he breathed and I fancied I could even feel his heartbeat. His mouth was next to my ear and I gloried in the sound of his breath and his small, soft murmurs of pleasure. I could have lain that way forever, pinned beneath my lover.
Then Veed started to move. His knees pushed into the backs of my thighs and his elbows into my back as he raised his hips. His cock pulled a couple of inches out of me but I didn't have time to register the loss because he immediately plunged it back in to the very bottom.
He wasn't starting slowly this time. Veed was going for it.
He withdrew to that same point and jammed it back in even harder. After a one-second pause he did it again, and again, not pausing in between. His pumps gained a rhythm and little guttural grunts came out of me every time he bottomed.
"Oh yeah, Fin," he gasped as he thrust. "You love my cock, don't you, baby?"
"Yes Veed!" I cried, overcome with the sensations and the emotions. "I love your beautiful hard cock!"
His breath in my ear got louder as he worked until he was huffing and puffing but his strong young body showed no sign of slowing. His thrusts got longer and once again I heard the exciting slap slap slap of skin on skin. My boyfriend pounded his sturdy tool into me fast, deep and hard and I could not have loved him more.
My cum erupted suddenly, without warning. One second I was loose and open, allowing full access to the deepest part of me, and the next instant my asshole clenched and my guts heaved. I came as hard as I ever had and squeezed Veed's cock with strength I never knew before. He thrust harder, never slowing even against my strong sphincter and still bottoming inside me once every second.
I was scarcely aware of my own high, continuous moan as my body wracked and contorted and my wonderful Veed slammed himself into me, reaching for his own climax. Somehow mine lasted until his began and we squeezed and thrust and grunted our way to hugely satisfying mutual completion.
It was the perfect fuck.
Thanks for reading Chapter 8 of Seeing More of the Neighbors. Chapter 9 is coming soon.
If you like my stuff have a look at my story archive here on my Prolific Authors page.
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