Date: Mon, 7 Jan 2002 10:11:07 -0800 (PST) From: AbSoLuTZaC Subject: Beach Party Part 4 Beach Party Part 4 "Zac Devlin! Wake up right now." "Huh?" I mumbled. "You are going to catch your death out here in this cold." "Mom? What are you doing here?" I said. I guess I fell asleep in the hot tub, and Ty? That must have been a dream. "Well, I tried calling you but you didn't answer the phone. So I just decided to stop by." She said. My mom is really cool. She has worked for the government like all her life. She is one of the top agents in her area. "What time is it?" I asked still sitting in the hot tub. "It is about a quarter to six. Do you still want to go jogging this morning?" She said eagerly. "Mom, I can't even move right now. Why don't you come back tomorrow, or even tonight and we can go jogging." "Ok, but get out of this hot tub, and get some clothes on and go to bed or whatever it is you do." "Mom, I am twenty-one years old. I don't need you telling me..." "I am not telling you, I am giving you an order." She pulled out her gun and aimed it at me. Something she did all the time. I knew she would never use it on me, but giving her the feeling that I was scared made her feel better." "Shit mom, put that thing away your going to shoot me someday and you are not going to like that at all one bit." I acted. "Then get the hell out of that tub and get some god damn clothes on!" "Yes ma'am." I got out of the hot tub, and let my ass face my mom. I grabbed a towel, and wrapped it around me. I walked into my bedroom and headed for the bathroom. I turned on the shower and washed myself up. "Hey, mind if I come in and take a piss?" Jacob asked. "Sure no prob, doors open. So how did you sleep last night?" I asked "Like a rock. That bed is really comfortable. I needed that. I have a long drive ahead of me today. I am going back to Texas." I turned the shower off, got out and wrapped up in a towel. "What? Why are you going back to Texas?" I said walking up to him. He was still over the toilet peeing. I put my arms around him and kissed his neck. "That is why I am leaving." He said as he shook it and put it away. "I came back here to find you to be with you. I have never loved anyone like I love you. You are everything to me. Now there is this obstacle, this little fucker Aaron from Seattle. What in the hell am I supposed to do? Sex with you is great. I can't do this. I don't know what to do." He said moving to sink to wash his hands. "Jacob, I am in the same situation. How do you think I feel right now? I am so confused. I don't know what I am supposed to do just as much as you are. You left me in a similar situation. What in the hell was I supposed to do? You were moving to Texas, and I was completely in love with you, and I have been since the sixth grade. After that night, in the morning when I was getting ready for school? You asked me to stay, and you told me you were still a little drunk. I wanted to so bad but I was afraid. I didn't know what I was feeling. I then realized how much I loved you. I wanted you back. But that was just one thing that I could not have. I tried dating, but the feeling for you was strong. Now six years later, I am finally over you. Then you come back, and I have learned to love another person. Fuck Holly. Fuck David. They didn't mean half as much. I love Aaron, and I love you. I don't know what to do right now." I looked at him with tears forming in my eyes, and I started yelling. "If you walk out that door, to go back to Texas and leave things unfinished, then life will feel extremely empty." I said turning my back. "I felt empty for a long time, please don't make me feel that way again. Please stay." I said walking out the bathroom door. I walked into my bedroom, and out onto the deck. I was in nothing but a towel and it was cold. I lit a cigarette, and sat down to smoke it. Why is this happening to me? How am I going to do this? Someone is going to get hurt. "Zacary Ryan Devlin! I am gonna kick your ass when I find you!" I heard Aaron scream. "What now?" Was the only thing I felt like mumbling. I didn't move. I just sat there and continued to smoke, and look out at the ocean. Looking at it like maybe it would give me some answers. The door that leads outside was pushed open rather hard. "I am gonna kick your ass." He said angrily. I flicked my cigarette at his feet. Looked at him, got up and walked down the stairs to the beach. "What the hell is your problem, Zac?" He said following me. I was now really angry. I spun around. "What in the hell is my problem? What in the hell is MY PROBLEM? My problem is I am being pulled two different ways. What is it that I have to do to make you people understand I DON'T KNOW WHAT IN THE FUCK IS GOING ON!" I screamed. He walked up to me and started to comfort me. "Why are you doing this to me Aaron? You were never like this in Seattle. I was the one always comforting you. I was the one to express my feelings. I have bled my feelings out to you some many times to get rejected. What do you want from me now, Aaron? Do you want me to drop to my knees and tell you how I feel once again? Do you want me to stop living my love life, and sit there and concentrate on nothing but you. I can't do that anymore. Now, Jacob is back and my feelings for him..." "Yes, Zac? What are your feelings for him?" He said backing away. "Does it really even matter? DOES IT? I have waited entirely too god damn long for you. I would pick you over Jacob in a heartbeat. All you have to do is say it Aaron. That is all you have to do." "Zac..." He said. He looked at me. I just looked at him, smiled and walked away. "Zac, come back here please." I just shook my head and kept walking. I went back into the house and headed for the living room. I turned on the radio, and just sat down on the couch. I think I fell asleep because I woke up to Aaron shaking me. "Jacob left. There is a note for you." He handed me the note. I closed my eyes. When I opened them tears just started flowing. I unfolded the note and read it: Zac, I am sorry that I came back into your life so abruptly. I could no longer deal with the feelings I had for you. I had to tell you. Not knowing what to expect, I set too many expectations. I love you, and now I can no longer hide my feelings. I am completely in love with you. My heart bleeds. I had to leave, I couldn't stand to be around, to see you and not hold you. Maybe things are meant to be this way. I am sorry. Love always, Jacob I crumbled the note up and threw it on the table. "How long ago did he leave Aaron?" I asked him standing. "I don't know, I think about ten minutes ago." He said moving closer to me. "You know I would never leave you..." He started to say. "Shut up Aaron." I said pushing him out of my way. I ran upstairs and threw on a hoodie. I grabbed my car keys and flew out the front door. Tears kept flowing down my face. I was driving to the pit. I know he would visit the pit before he left. That is where we always went to get away from people, and life. That is where we would hang out when we skipped school. I took the turn too fast. I didn't have time to break. I smashed into the tree. I didn't have my seatbelt on. I flew through the windshield, and landed on the hood. I remember turning my body around and looking up into the sky. I was still conscious. My head was bleeding, and I couldn't feel my left arm. I think it is broken. I can hear sirens in the distance. Oh, I am so cold. Did I remember to wear clothes? Of course I did. Then he appeared. It was Jacob. He was there. He was holding me. "Oh my god. Zac, hold on your gonna be ok." He said rubbing my face. I just looked at him and smiled. I knew I would be ok as long as Jacob was with me. He started crying. Blackness came over me. Please send comments to Absolutzac@yahoo.com I left it open...Should I keep more coming or end it....Let me know...