Date: Tue, 03 Feb 2004 00:34:29 -0500
From: lgastvndve@yahoo.com
Subject: Ben and Johnathan reunion of love.

My name is Benjamen and I am have known I was gay since I was a freshman in
high school.  I tried to hide to the best of my abilities by dating a girl
here and there, and even sleeping with random girls from time to time, so
that I could brag about it like all the other guys would do.  Eventually I
just could not lie to myself or anyone else, I had to be my self now know
matter who liked it or not.  I was not afraid to come out to my parents
because I knew that they would accept me for who I was because my uncle was
gay and was living with his partner.  I was more afraid to come out to my
friends because I did not know how they would react.  I really did not want
to tell my best friend Johnathan I knew that I could not lose him, but I
also knew if we were to had a great lasting friendship he needed to know
the truth.  I first came out to my parents and they were very supportative
of me, and told me that know matter what they would always love me.  The
next thing I had to do was find to tell Johnathan.  I decided that it would
be best to tell him his house that way if he could not handle it, I would
be the one that could just up and leave, and he would not have to go
anywhere.  So I called him up and asked if I could come over because there
was something that I wanted to tell him and I could not wait.  He told me
to come on over.  I got in my BMW and drove the 10 minutes to his house,
all the while thinking how I was going to tell him that I was not the
person who he grew to love as a brother.  That I had been keeping something
from him for many many years.  When I got to his house I took a deep breath
and walked up the steps to the door.  I knocked and Johnathan let me in and
took me straight to his room.  He sat on the bed just like he normally did
when we were in his room, but istead of sitting next to sitting next to him
sat down in his computer chair.  He looked at me with a questioning look as
to why I was not sitting next to him.  He finally ask

"dude why are you sitting over there, and not next to me.  Is something
really wrong, you look a little weird tonight.

"Well I sat over here because I thought you would be more comfortable with
me over here after you hear what I have to tell you."

"Dude tell me whats wrong?  The way you are looking at me is frightnening
me a little. I don't know if I can stand without knowning anymore."

I took a deep breath and then started to tell him.

"Well Johnathan, there is something that I have not told you about my self
in all the years that we have known each other.  Something that I have
hidden from you and all my friends and family.  This is something that I
have been afraid to tell you becausre I did not know how you will react,
and I still am not sure if you will want to be friends with me after you
hear this."

"Ben I don't understand.  We have always told each other everything, you
said you would never lie to me, and I said I would never lie to you.  I
don't understand what could be so bad that you would have to keep it from
and and everyone else.  I always told you that I would be there for you
know matter. I thought that you could trust me to let me know about
everything."

I started to cry because I knew that I had hurt him already and he did not
even know what was going on with me.  I sat there looking at him with wide
eyes trying to decide if I just wanted to blurt out I am gay.

"Ben tell me what is going on in your head, Please."

I finally spoke.

"Johnathan I am sorry that I have to keep this from you, and I am sorry
that I have hurt you so much by not telling you, but I just didn't want
everyone to hate me.  So this is what I have to say to you right now."

Johnathan was looking at me with this scared look at me, trying to
understand what I was about to say.

"Johnathan I am Gay.  I have always been gay every since I was a little
kid.  I knew I like boys so much more than girls. When I got to high it
became more and more apparent that I was gay when all my friends were
starting to get turned on so much by girls. I was getting more turned on by
guys.  I did not think any one would want to be aroudn me after I told them
so I lied and started dating and sleeping around with girls just to know
one would suspect.  But is just got to hard for me and I could not do it
anymore, I had to finally be myself in order to keep from going insand.  So
that is what I needed to tell you"

Johnathat was sitting on his bed with this grin on his face and he started
to laugh.  I thought you thought was kidding with him

"Johnathan this is know joke I am telling you the truth. I really am gay"

Johnathan finally spoke up.

"Ben I am not laughing at you because I thougth you were kidding, I am
laughing because you felt you had to hide this from me, and because you
were so scared to tell me that you were gay"

"I think I have always known that you were gay.  I just knew you were not
ready to tell anyone especially me.  I figured one day you would finally
tell me because you would have to be true to your self and you would need
to start dating men instead of wonmen"

"Dude how did you know I was gay.  I said to him"

"Well you know how we sleep in the same bed when you sleep over.  And we
normally get undressed together?  Well a few time I caught you looking at
me in the mirror when was getting undresed and I could see this look of
pleasure in your face.  Also when we would sleep together in bed you would
lay so close to me, and I could feel you looking at me.  I could also see
you getting hard ons when we were naked together.  When we watched porn you
also seemed to be more interested in watching then men the you were with
the girls."

I just stared at him in amazement while he continued speaking.

"I just don't understand why you felt you had to lie to me about this.  I
don't understand why you would think that I would hate you for this."

"Well I guess I just figured most people don't always except gay people and
I thought maybe you would be one of them too."

"Well I guess you now know that is not true.  I am not going to stop being
your best friend because you like men more than you like women, and would
rather fuck them then fuck a women.  So now that I know I hope you won't
keep lies from me anymore."

"Oh johnathan I promise I will not lie to you anymore, I will always tell
you the truth from now on.  I am also glad that you do not hate me for this
and will want to be my friends .  I do understand if somethings may change
because of this.  Like us sleeping in the same bed and you being naked in
front of me."

Johnathan just started laughing at that.

"Nothing is going to change between use.  I know you would never try
anything with me, and who cares if you look at me at least someone is at
sometime."

I just started to laugh.  I knew that I was not the only one who looked at
Johnathan because I could see every women that walked by him look at
him. He was very handsome. He had dark brown hair and chocolate puppy dog
eyes.  He was tall and very muscular.  Every time I looked at him I lost my
breath for a few seconds because he was so handsome. I am not unattractive
but I will say this man is more attractive than I would ever be.  I am not
saying that I didn't get the looks too, for I did because I was
attractive. I am 5'9 with blonde hair and green eyes, and I was 165 lbs
most of it muscle for working out.  But Johnathan was just more attractive
then I was in my opinion.

"Well then I will keep looking at you if you don't mind cause I think you
are fucking hot. I decided I would tell him that just to make him happy."

After I told Johnathan I ended up going home and thinking how lucky I was
to have a friend like Johnathan and for my whole family.  I then started to
think about Johnathan again and started to get totally aroused by
everything I was thinking about.  I started to think about his nice tone
muscles and his firm ass, and large cock.  I was starting to get so hard
that I had to do something about it. So I lay down on my bed and stuck my
hands in my pants and start to rub up and down on my cock while thinking of
Johnathan.  That night I came like never before.  I then went to bed and
had the best dreams of Johnathan ever.

The rest of my coming out went okay for the most part, most of my friends
were okay with it, some werent but I had everyone I need in my life
anyways.  The rest of my senior year when by fast.  I spend a lot of time
applying to college and studying to keep my grades high.  I finally heard
from the college I wanted to go to that I had gotten in.  I had gotten in
to Yale I was so excited I just couldn't wait to tell Johnathan.  When I
finally told him he was so happy yet so sad.

"Hey buddy why are you so sad."

"I am happy for you Ben but I am sad because I am going to go to Uva and I
will miss you so much.  We have never been this far about before I just
don't know how I will cope with out you.

"Oh Johnathan we will still be friends even though you are far away.  We
can make it work. I thought this was true but in my heart I guess I knew it
would never work."

Johnathan and I spend so much time together before we each headed off to
our colleges for four years.  I did not want to live in the dorms, so I
decided to get an apartment, and my parents said that they would help me
pay for some of the rent as long as I maintained my grades.  A month before
I was to head out to Yale my parents were in a bad car accident and they
both died.  I was devastated and did not think that I could go to school,
but Johnathan had convinced me that I needed to go that it was what my
parents would want. I knew he was right. You probably think that how was
the young kid going to pay for Yale.  Well I had two trustfund basically.
One was set up by my grandmother and the other was sat up by my parents. I
was to get this money when I turned 18 to what ever I wanted with it.  My
parents had also put aside money for my college and there was enough in
there to pay for everything that I needed for school, including my living
expensives.  So all in all I have a few million dollars to my name,
although I would have tried everything for the lives of my parents.  But I
finally did head to yale for the freshman year saying could bye to
Johnathan.  It was hard to say good bye because he was pretty much the only
family I had, and I knew I may never see him again because I planned to
stay in Conneticut for good.

Johnathan and I remained close for a few months but then we just go so busy
that we never got to write or call each other.  Eventually we just kind of
forgot about each other.  I made new friends at school, and even dated a
few guys.  One guy I thought was really going to last but it didn't.  He
hurt my feelings so much so I decided after him I was going to stop dating
for a while.  I did but I also slept around with a few people never getting
attached to anyone because I did not want to get hurt at all.

I had the best roommates ever who took care of me when I went through my
break up.  The four years at yale went by slow. There was so much work to
be done that I rarely had time to do anything else.  When graduation came I
was sad because my parents would not be there, but I knew they were with me
in spirit.  After graduation I headed to BU to go to law school.  I moved
in with some guys I had met a few times through my old roommates.  The knew
I was moving to the city and told me I could move in with the when there
old roommate moved out.  I was happy that I did not have to look for a new
apartment that took some of the stress of me.  The first few months at law
school went by pretty quick with the work and the job I had interning for a
judge.  I did not have much time to make a lot of friends, I did not have a
boyfriend nor did I have a real desire to find one since I still did not
want to get hurt.  I did have a few friends aside from my roommates here,
so those are the ones that I spent a lot of time with.  They were all
pretty open to me being gay, and did not seem to really care that I was.
Most of them tried to hook me up with others they knew to be gay but I told
them not to do that, I was not ready yet.

Christmas was slowly approaching and for the first time in four years I was
going to have plans.  The years after my parents had died I decided I did
not want to celebrate it just hurt to much.  This year my friends decided
that we were going to have our own christmas since they could not fly home
to their families.  We decided that we were going to all hang out at their
apartment and cook dinner, and watch some movies open presents and all the
good stuff.  That is what we did.  The night went by pretty well, and I
decided I was going to crash at their place for a week or so, since I did
not want to be at my apartment for the new years.

I went to work the day after christmas and it was pretty slow since it was
still the holiday.  When I got back to my friends I was told they were have
another friend over that night, and friend that had just moved to the city
from virginia.  He was going to be coming over sometime after dinner.  We
all got the apartment ready since it was a mess from the partying we had
done the day before.  When we finished the door bell rang, and my friends
went to open it.  As the man walked in I turned to look at him to introduce
myself.  When I turned around I could hardly believe my eyes.  The man
walking in was Johnathan. He had aged a llittle, and was a little more
built then he had been the day we left for school, but I was sure it was
him.  My friend walked him in and introduced.

"Johnathan this is..."

"Benjamine."

"Johnathan is that really you?  I cant believe this it has been so long."

My two friend just stared at us wondering how we new each other.

"Benjamine this is so fucking unbelieveable.  Never in a million years
would I have guessed I would run into you here.  Last I knew you were
living in Conneticut I guess you must have move."

"yeah I moved here to go to law school.  What the hell are you doing here
John?"

"well I moved here to work.  I got offered a great job and could not pass
up the chance to move out here.  I meet these guys at work , and they
invited me over to watch some movies and hang out."

"Well I am so glad you are here."

I told him about my last four years and he told me about his.  Things just
went back to the way they were when we were best friends I just could not
believe this at all.  I was so happy this was my best friend, and also the
guy I had been in love with since I could remember even though he never new
it.  Johnathan I had just come from shopping and he was showing us some of
the things that he had bought.  He showed us the new movies, and the boxers
he had bought.  The boxers are what caught my intention the most.  He had a
green and red pair, and a black silk pair .  I started to imagine him
wearing the black pairs and I started to smile.  I must have had a huge
grin on my face because Johnathan look at me and started to laugh, and my
other friends just wink at me.

"Dude do you like what I bought?" Johnathan ask.

"Yeah I think everything is pretty cool."

"why don't we go watch a movie now I said to change the subject."

I sat down on the cough and so did markand Tom.  Johnathan put the movie
into the dvd and then walked over to the couch and ask if he coujdl sit
down next to me.  I said sure but wasn't sure why he didn't just sit in the
chair.  I wasn't going to really complain because I loved being this close
to him.  I had never felt so much electricity with anyone beforel, but I
knew I nothing was ever going to happen between us, but I was still going
to enjoy this moment.

During the movie I keep feeling Johnathan rub my leg but I thought he was
doing it by accident so I didn't think much of it.  Later on he started to
move as close as possible to me putting his arm around me, now I knew this
wasn't a mistake but I wasn't sure what to make of it.  He then start to
pull me into him, and I looked up at him wondeirng what was going on. He
just smiled and wink at me. I knew that he was doing this for a reason and
that he was enjoying this very much.  He then started to rub his other hand
up and down my leg making me shudder with extasy.  He then asked if I want
a massage.  I said yeah that would be really nice to I sat in front of him.
He started rubbing my shoulders, and my back for a while, then stopped and
pulled me towards him, and wrapped his arms around my neck making sure I
wasn't going to leave that position. I leaned into him and relaxed a
little.  He keep breathing heavy, so I thought I was hurting him and kept
trying to move away from him, but he would just pull me more into
him. Later on I learned he was smiling my hear.  After awhile he knew I
wasn't going to leave so he let go and started to rub my chest, and legs.
And held my hands.  I could feel is erection starting to grow and new that
he was getting turned on by all of this. I just sat the wondering how this
could be happened.  He then leaned down and kissed my neck and whispered in
my ear.

"Ben I am so glad I am here with you, I missed you so much, and I have
wanted to be with you like this for years now."

I couldn't believe this was happening.  When did he become gay or realize
he was gay.  I just sat there smiling and leaning into him.  After the
movie was done mark and tom retreated to their bedrooms leaving me in the
living room with Johnathan.

"Johnathan how long have you been gay."

"well I guess always but just recently started to really believe it myself,
then when I walked into this apartment and saw you I knew in a instant that
I really was gay because my whole body felt something for you.  I cant say
when but it just did."

I sat there in his arms still just amazed at the nights events. I then move
and sat next to him and he turned to face me, and I looked into his eyes
and was so glad that he was here.  I leaned iin to kiss him, and he opened
his mouth for m, and I slid my tongue in and out of his mouth a few
minutes.  We explored each others mouths for a while.  Then I broke the
kiss.  I realized that I need to go to my place before anything could
happen. I just could do anything here at my friends. I wrote and not and
told Ben that we were going to my apartment.

We walked through the city and found my apartment, and went in.  As we got
in John just grabbed me, and kissed me with so much passionate I just
melted into his arms.  We stayed like that for minutes.  I didn't want to
let go of him but I knew I had to.  We walked nto the bedroom.  He then
again kissed me and started to undress me. I stopped him.

"Johnathan I cant do this with you right now.  I really want to but it is
just to fast for me right now.  I still need to process somethings."

"Well Ben I guess I will go now."

"No please don't go I need you here I have missed you so much.  Stay and
lay with me, sleep in my bed. I need to feel you with me.  This is
somehting I have always wanted baby.  I have loved you forever but was
never able to tell you that."

"You have what Ben?"

I knew that I had said something that might have scared him, but I couldn't
take it back.

"I have loved you forever more then just friends."

"Oh Ben my honey I love you too, and I realize that I always have.  It
feels so nice to here it from you."

"So does that mean you will stay here with me Johnathan?"

"Yes Ben I will sleep next to you if that is all you want right now."

"Thank you baby for this I think that is what I want more than anything
right now."

Johnathan and I got into bed and just laid there.  I wanted so bad to touch
but didn't think it was wise.  It felt like this night was goingh to go on
forever.  I then moved to my side and saw Johnathan looking at me smiling
and I leaned in to kiss him, and knew right then I wanted more.  SO I moved
him over and got on top of him.  And started to kiss his neck, and his
chest moving down to his stomach.  I then reached his cock and wrap my
mouth around it.  Johnathan let out a moan, and said "ph Ben I have wanted
this so much it feels so good."  I kept this up for a while till I sensed
him reaching orgasm.  Then He let go and shot his load down my throat while
I sucked every last drop of his cum.

"Oh Ben that felt so good it was the most amazing thing that has ever been
done to me."

He then got up and pull me into him and kissed me, and then pushed me down
on the bed.  Kissing me all over.  "Ben I want to feel you in me tonight.
I wanted to be connected to you in so many ways.  Will you do that for me.
Will you make love to tonight.

"Oh Johnathan if that is what you I will love to make love to you."

I reached over the night stand and grab some lube and a condom.  I then
started to lick Johns crack sticking my tongue in his hole, and then I lbe
one finger and stuck that in first, then two, Then I lube is whole some
more and put the condom on.  Then I positioned myself so my cock was
pushing against his whole I went slow letting him get use to the feel, then
pushed more in and more till I was in all the way.  Then I started to
slowly pump in and out.  John start to moan, and scream. I was pounding
away at him, and he was getting hard again, and I was just pounding away, I
could feel my orgasm coming and I pounded harder and harder.  I then let go
and felt my cock release its juices into the condom and then John came with
out even being touchs.  I stayed n top of himn for a while till I sliped
out, and took the condom off and kissed John.

"That was so good baby.  I love you so much."

"I love you too more than you can ever know."

I then lay down next to him and held him to me as we fell asleep. I knew
this was the perfect thing ever. I just could not imagine anything better.

To be continued I think.  If you want more let me know I will do it faster.