From: rick.wagner@mansco.com (Rick Wagner)
Subject: %%% Secrets (M/M)
Date: Thu, 26 Jun 1997 21:45:27 GMT
Organization: MANSCO

SECRETS 
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  Jeff reached over and laid his hand across the taut musculature of
Steve's tanned ass, cupping the mounds in his hand and massaging them with
the tenderness a monk would show the very Grail.  As Steve stirred lightly
in his sleep, wriggling his ass slightly under Jeff's touch, Jeff moved his
attention down into the moist, warm crack between the mounds, moving the
tips of his fingers from the small of Steve's back, down through the forest
of stiff blond hairs which protected the approach to Steve's ass-hole and,
finally, over the hole itself.  He smoothed out the tangled hairs and began
to slowly massage the very center of this wonderland.

  As he prodded the pucker, he felt Steve stir once again even as his own
iron-hard dick began to throb ever harder.  No longer satisfied with
keeping passion at arm's length, Jeff was excited to see Steve's legs part
now, so that, sleeping or not, he could use his hips to force his dick into
the warm tangle of sheets which lay beneath him.  Jeff moved his body
between the thrusting legs, and pushed his tongue down into the pink hole.
At first, he was content to lick at the scent of Steve's body, but as the
ass-hole became thoroughly wetted, Jeff began using his tongue more like a
cock - ramming it deeper and deeper into the hole itself to liberate more
and more of Steve's unique scent.  As Jeff grew still hotter, Steve's
pelvic thrusts grew still more abandoned, and he began to moan softly each
time Jeff's tongue entered him.  Unable to resist the pounding inside his
dick any longer, Jeff straddled his sleeping friend and lay his cock up
against his own private doorway of excitement.

  Jeff lay atop Steve , feeling more and more excited by the thrusting of
Steve's hips.  He ran his right hand gently over the undulant flank below
him, using only his left hand and toes to keep himself from crushing down
and stopping the wild thrusting.  Jeff kissed the back of Steve's neck,
gently at first and then, to prevent the shock of entry from being too
abrupt, he lightly bit at the neck as he slipped his throbbing cock home
inside Steve's moistened and waiting ass.  As he was entered, the blond kid
moaned once and began an almost frantic thrusting against the twisted
sheets below him.  Jeff pushed his hands under Steve's massive chest and
squeezed the stud's nipples between his thumb and fingers.  This was all he
was able to do, other than hang on to avoid being bucked off by the
mindless violence of Steve's thrusting receptivity.  Within moments, Jeff
felt his balls draw themselves up to squeeze his come into the tight ass
pounding beneath him, as he heard a growl come from the prone body entering
orgasmic convulsions.  This animal noise, combined with the pressure along
the entire length of his dick and the amok pounding of flesh against his
hairy body, was simply too much.  Jeff felt himself lose control over his
fate and exploded, pumping home gusher after gusher of grade-A American
cum.  The blasts of cum continued even after Jeff's dick was jerked free of
its sheath, and cum flew all over the bed.  Soon, he was covered with cum
and was finally satisfied.

  At least Jeff was satisfied until he awoke to find his phantom Steve
vanished, his bed torn up, and cum everywhere - even dripping from the
headboard.  Then in rapid succession, he was confused disappointed, and
more frustrated than he had ever been before.  He was confused at first
because he hadn't had a wet dream since he was about thirteen.  He was
disappointed because the events in his dream hadn't really happened, and ,
because they weren't likely to occur in real life, he grew more frustrated.

  Jeff went in for yet another long cold shower.  As he soaped his mass of
crisply curled black hair, he reminisced.  He and Steve had known each
other well since their undergraduate days and had roomed together up until
Steve's marriage six months before.  In the beginning, Jeff had hoped he
could work up the guts to let Steve know how he felt about him - that
whenever Steve was around, he could think of nothing and no one else: and
whenever Steve was gone, Jeff could think of nothing but his return. Once
in a while, when they got horny because their girlfriends wouldn't put out,
they would like on their beds and have jerk-off contest.  Jeff had arranged
the bureau between their two beds so that he could lie there and watch
Steve pull off his thick dick with practiced strokes without Steve's being
aware of his buddy's interest in his cock.  Jeff stroked along with Steve
and the instant Steve started to groan and shoot his jism, Jeff would go
off like a rocket.

  Jeff's obsession grew over the years until, by the time Steve moved out
to marry Ann, he nearly slavered whenever Steve was around.  Finally, Jeff
gave up all hope of working up the guts to tell Steve how much he loved him
- and probably lose even his friendship: he figured that Steve's marriage
might be a good thing. At least they wouldn't constantly be thrown together
by circumstance.  If anything, however, the obsession became absolute.

  Both Steve and Jeff were starting their second year of law school and
Jeff rapidly discovered that he couldn't concentrate on anything but images
of Ann's spindly legs hooked around Steve's firm, delicious ass.  Even
though Jeff had tried girls himself, he wanted to bar whenever he thought
of Steve and Ann in the sack.  These thoughts came often enough immediately
after the marriage but when, as often happens, Steve's time was taken up
more and more with Ann and her friends, and Jeff saw less and less of him,
his flights of fancy became even more oppressive.  He hadn't seen Steve
outside of class in three weeks now, and Jeff was afraid he was going off
his chump altogether.

  He had taken to wacking off at least three times a day, dreaming back on
the years they had shared.  They began as simple roomates and progressed by
stages through being drinking buddies, confidants, and ultimately, through
the accumulation of shared secrets and experiences, to something very near
brothers.  The one secret he hadn't shared with Steve over the years was
the most important, and now even the wacking off wasn't helping.  Jeff was
seriously considering seeing a shrink: he had to do something or he would
end up a vegetable - and a horny vegetable at that.  Just as he was
deciding that the shower was, to coin a phrase, a washout, the phone rang.

  "Howdy, Slick. How've you been? I haven't seen you in weeks?"

  "Oh! How's it going, Steve ?  I was just thinking about you.  How's
married life treating you?" As he talked, he looked down at his cock,
watching it grow hard and thick with every word Steve said.

  "What are you doing tonight? How's you like to go out for some beers?
Maybe a cruise up the beach?"

  Jeff began to move his fist up and down around his stiff dick.  "Thanks,
I'd like to but I should stay in and catch up on those damn Henderson's
torts.  If I fuck up one more time, he'll have me clerking for the village
idiot come graduation!  Maybe we could do something over the weekend?"

  "Well, that might be OK.  Actually, Jeff , there's something I'd like to
talk to you about though, It's kind of important.  Henderson isn't until
Thursday - maybe you could catch up tomorrow night?  I could send you my
notes and you could plow through the cases in no time."

  Jeff quickened the pace of his hand movement.  "What do you need to talk
about?  I'd really ..." By this time, of course, Jeff had given up trying
to put it off any longer.  He's been afraid that seeing Steve alone would
fuck him up severely: but, then he decided that he was about as fucked up
as he could get, so he had nothing to lose.  Besides, maybe seeing the
bastard in the flesh would ease th tension a little: "Sure, what the fuck -
why don't we meet at Moose's about eight.  We can decide where to go from
there."

  "Sounds good - I'll see you there.  And thanks."

  With Steve's last words still in his ears, Jeff shot a thick load of cum
and watched it run slowly down his hard gut into his belly button



  When Jeff got to the old hangout about ten till eight, Steve was already
waiting.  He motioned Jeff over to a booth and proceeded to talk about
classes, married life, Central America, and a thousand other things without
really saying anything.  After about an hour and three pitchers, Steve was
still in amazingly good shape.  He suggested that they get in the car and
head north for a drive along 101 to a beach they used to go to for
all-night binges.  Jeff really wasn't much in the mood for a night's revel,
but it was pretty obvious that something big was bothering Steve . He
suspected that his buddy was finally feeling married - and needed to escape
for a while from the domestic ties to prove to himself that he hadn't lost
his identity. Or maybe he'd had a fight with the spindly-legged bitch, and
just needed to get away.  In either event, Jeff was enjoying the evening's
echoes of the old days and his misspent youth, so he decided to go along
with Steve and the drive.

  They piled into Steve's MG and stopped on the way out of town to buy a
case of beer. Jeff was more or less already blind, but Steve seemed to be
still sober.  On the way up the coast, they watched the moon go down and,
by the time they got to their destination, the wind had come up.  Steve
pulled a blanket out of his trunk, and Jeff carried the remains of the case
as they traipsed through the sand.  After they'd arranged the blanket with
the case between them, Steve just kicked back and looked at the stars and
the ocean.  After a few minutes, Jeff said, "OK, Slick, what is this all
about - let's have it," but Steve just shook his head and turned away
toward the stars again.

  Jeff opened another beer and leaned back to wait.  He looked at the ocean
for a few minutes - but that got old real quick.  There was just enough
glow from the stars and an occasional passing car on the highway for him to
see the outline of Steve's body, so he amused himself by just looking at
his friend.  He couldn't see the light blue eyes or the cleft in his chin.
He couldn't make out the dimples - but then Steve didn't seem to be doing a
lot of smiling tonight, anyway.  He could see the stars being reflected by
Steve's surfer-blond hair.  The cute little nose and massive jaw were
clearly outlined against the star-lit sand.  Married life might have added
a few pounds to the frame, but he'd already noticed that Steve had kept his
flat gut and the ass seemed as firm as ever.  He progressed in memory to
the massive tanned chest and the cut seven- incher that he'd seen so often
but was afraid to go after.  He began to loose himself in more thoughts of
that beautiful tight ass, when he saw that down that path lay sure madness:
"Hey, Steve, do you still have the towels and stuff in the trunk?"

  "Sure, but you're not going swimming in this wind?"

  "Why not, it sounds good - I need to wake up and work off some of this
beer or I'll pass out!" Jeff ran up to the car, got the towel, dropped his
clothes on the way past the blanket , and took a long, careful swim,
staying just beyond the surf, but banishing Eros entirely.  By the time he
got back to the blanket, he felt like one of those mastodons Eskimos always
seem to be finding in glaciers, but his dick had shrivelled to nothing and
his outlook on the world had brightened considerably.  He carefully dried
himself, dressed, and wrapped himself in the blanket next to the beer case
to watch the sea and stars.

  Before long, he felt better still just because he felt a less important
part of the cosmic order.  His problems could be solved, somehow. He did
notice, however, that Steve wasn't the happy drunk tonight.  Usually, the
blinder he got, the louder he grew.  Tonight, he just lay there pouring
down beers.  Every other can or so, he'd get up to pee, sigh a couple of
times, and stretch back out on the blanket.  Once again, Jeff had asked
what it was all about, only to be told that steve wasn't drunk enough yet
to talk about it.

  Soon, however, the case was almost history and Steve finally seemed more
or less ready to spill his proverbial guts - "I fucked up bad, Jeff . I've
already told Ann all about this, and I think she's leaving me.  I need
advice about what to do but I want you to promise me something.  I want you
to promise me that you'll keep anything I tell you to yourself."

  "Have you ever known me not to?"

  "Shit, I don't know what to do.  Telling you all about this is worse than
Annie.  I know you like me well enough, but what do you really think of
me?"

  "As of a man faithful and honourable."

  "No, Plonius, I don't think I'm either.  That's my problem.  I want you
to promise me one more thing.  I value your friendship more than anything
else in the world.  I want you to promise me that even if you can't respect
me as a person after I tell you what I've done, that you'll give me what
advice you can, and then not hold anything I say against me afterwards."

  "OK, forchrissake! What did you do, waste Judge Crater?"

  Steve popped open the last can in the case, sighed, and turned away form
Jeff so he could look out at the ocean as he talked.  "You asked me on the
phone how married life agreed with me - it doesn't.  It's not Annie's
fault.  She's been great, especially considering all the problems we've
had.  It's me - I never should have married her."

  "What's the problem? Are you impotent? Have herpes? What's the problem,
for heaven's sake?"

  "You are.  You know I've always liked you.  Even when you're being a
bastard for one reason or another.  During our senior year, you.  At first
- no, let me tell this - then you can do what you want.  At first, I
thought they were just something that would go away.  Then last year, even
with the work law school dumps in your lap, it got worse.  Finally, I
figured I was just horny and since I saw more of you then anyone else, I
was using you as a fantasy figure.  That's why I started off with Ann.  At
first, things went OK.  The first couple of times we screwed, I was on top
of the world.  So I asked her to marry me, and figured that would make
everything OK.

  "A few weeks after the wedding, thought, things started to go wrong.  For
one thing, once the pressure was off, I didn't really need her much.  Once
a week was usually enough to keep my head clear, but she was after me all
the time.  If I just went to bed and slept, she'd cry herself to sleep
because I didn't love her, didn't find her exciting, or some such shit.  So
- I would screw her nearly every night.  The problem was that the only way
I could get it up was to pretend that she was you.  I'd pretend that it was
your lips on my dick, that it was your tits I was sucking.  Finally, it got
where even this wouldn't work all the time Then the other night, just as I
was ready to dump my load, I yelled your name.  I guess you know she was
upset! I can't say I blame her, but that's the story.  I've thought it over
and only see three ways out.  No, don't say anything until I'm finished or
I'll mess this up more than I already have.  I'm almost done.

  "I suggested that Ann and I should go see a shrink or marriage counselor.
Maybe they could get me fixed up, though I really don't see what they could
do about it.  I've seriously considered just blowing my brains out.  That
would solve the problem right away. Ann came up with another alternative,
which is why I'm dumping all this in you lap.  She suggested that I ask you
to fuck me or something, and maybe that would get you out of my
system. That way, I could see that reality doesn't live up to my fantasy
and I could forget about you as 'just a sex object.'  Or, if the experience
does measure up to my fantasy, at least then I'll know for sure.  If you
actually want to thing about something like this ... I want you to take
your time.  I've wrestled with this problem for years and a while longer
isn't going to make much difference.  I can tell the way you're laying
there that the idea grosses you out completely.

  "I'm sorry, just forget the whole thing.  It was Annie's idea.  I'd never
have brought it up myself - I've been trying to get drunk enough not to
mind all night, but I'm still cold sober.  No matter how freaked out you
are, I hope you'll remember that I can't help how I feel about you, and
that I'm the same person I always was, even if you didn't know the whole
story."

  By this time, Jeff couldn't hold back any longer.  His wildest dreams had
just become possible and the poor sap was torturing himself with guilt.
The irony was just too much for anyone with as much beer in him as Jeff
had.  He began to giggle at the absurdity of their situation and said,
"Look, shithead ... " Even more afraid than before, Steve stopped him,
"Don't tell me what you think till morning.  Let's not try to drive back to
town now - we're both too looped for that.  Just go to sleep and tell me
what you think in the morning."

  Jeff started to reach over to Steve to prove what he thought but Steve
shrank back, "No, Forchrissake, I don't need pity! Just please think it
over. Don't give me your answer until morning - please!"

  Jeff threw the empty case off the blanket and moved over next to Steve ,
covering both of them with the blanket.  Soon the warmth they shared,
started to send them to their long-delayed sleep.  Just before he slipped
off, Jeff asked, "Suppose I agree to fuck you, then what! Assuming you
aren't turned off, what about Ann?"

  "I don't think Ann's possible anyway.  I shouldn't ever have married her!
I'm sorry for her - but there isn't much I can do about that now but get
out of her life.  I don't know what happens to me either way.  I guess that
would depend on yo.  I don't know. Let's talk about this in the
morning. Now that I've finally unloaded all this, the beer's caught up with
me."

  Before long, both of them had fallen asleep together under the blanket.
They slept until the tide came in the next morning to wake them. At Jeff's
suggestion, they started back for his apartment.  Neither said much on the
way back down the coast - Steve , half hoping Jeff had been too drunk to
remember his confession, was too ashamed to talk about the situation, and
Jeff was just too fucking excited ... and afraid that Steve might have been
too drunk the night before to remember what he had said.

  As Steve was getting a beer out of the refrigerator to help prepare
himself for the hard discussion to follow. Jeff went into the john, peed,
and brushed his teeth.  He stripped and examined his tight body in the
mirror.  Satisfied, he went back into the living room to find Steve on the
couch, waiting their talk.  Steve's eyes popped open with surprise when he
saw Jeff naked ... and with a superb hardon swinging in front of him as he
approached the couch.  Jeff grabbed Steve by the hand, led him into the
bedroom and pushed him down on the bed.  He threw himself down beside
Steve, smoothing back his friend's windblown blond hair as Steve trembled
slightly, not knowing what else was coming. Jeff looked down into Steve's
cornflower-blue eyes as his hand moved down across Steve's thick neck and
thence down his side, feeling the tiny blond hairs snap back as his hand
progressed.  Jeff leaned over and ,gently at first, began to kiss his
sweetheart on the neck and then on the mouth.  Before either of them knew
what was happening, the two were entwined, with Jeff lying on top, grinding
his entire body against Steve's while driving his tongue down into the
other's mouth.  Jeff moved off Steve and, moving slowly to appreciate the
experience to the maximum, began to unbutton Steve's shirt to reveal the
tanned, almost hairless chest crowned by his two fabulous, rock-hard
nipples.  Jeff leaned over and began to flick the tip of his tongue against
a nipple while Steve could only throw back his head and moan.  Sucking the
nipple into the mouth to savour it, Jeff moved his hand down across the
firm, flat belly to Steve's belt, undoing the clasp and zipper with the
slow relish acquired during the past five years. Steve had kicked off his
shoes, so it took Jeff only a second to leave the by-now tooth-marked
nipple to shuck off Steve's clothes so that nothing would separate them any
longer.

  Jeff pulled the covers over them as he lay back down.  Then, his arms
holding Steven as he molded his body to his love's, he told him of the
years of lust and hidden love, of the secret hidden first from himself and
then from Steven.  As they once more shared their warmth, he finished his
little speech by saying that he could not know whether Steve would be
"disenchanted" or no - but that he was Steve's for as long as Steve wanted
him.

  As proof, Jeff began once again to kiss Steven, first on the mouth.  Then
he moved to run his tongue in and out of the cleft in Steven's chin - which
had always held a special fascination for him. Jeff slowly worked his way
back down to the nipples, the belly, and, finally, to the thick rod rising
from tufts of golden hair.  Jeff was surprised at the size of the head.
Dwarfing the shaft, it seemed to glow red, pulsating in time with Steve's
heart.  Jeff had intended to begin with a few slow strokes of the tongue to
wet the surface.  Instead, he swallowed the entire head, filling the inside
of his mouth in the process.  The monster was so large that he couldn't do
justice to it except by pushing it deep down against the moist, tender
entrance to this throat.

 Though the head was much to large to go any further. Jeff was able to get
at the underside, whipping his tongue wildly along the tender ridge at the
bottom.  He didn't even notice Steve's howls of pleasure or the thrusting
of Steve's hips as he tried, again and again, to ram the head further into
Jeff's throat.

  Locked together through their bond of discovered pleasure, time seemed to
stop for them.  Suddenly, however, what seemed like gallons of fluid was
shot deep down into Jeff's guts as Steven could hold back no longer.
Keeping his throat open and tongue busy, Jeff took every drop there was and
then carefully licked up the remains before he moved once again out from
under the covers to face his friend.  As he lay beside Steve, Jeff saw
Steve's face streaming tears, his chest racked with spasms.  Reacting to
Jeff's look for concern. Steve tried a smile and said simply "I'd never
believed it could be so beautiful!  I'll remember this forever - it was
fantastic.  You wore me to a fucking frazzle "

  Exhausted, but not finished, Steve told him that his dick still had one
last gasp left, but before they went any further, he wanted Jeff to fulfill
a long-cherished fantasy.  He wanted Jeff to fuck him senseless. Not one to
argue, Jeff threw off the covers and reached down to grab Steve's angles.
He pushed them up over his head and threw his face down into Steve's tight
ass.  He licked and probed in a delightful deja vu and then pushed himself
into Steve in a quick thrust.  Looking down into those blue eyes and that
mouth parted in ecstasy as he rammed his cock into Steve's asshole was the
highlight of his life, just as Steve, looking up at the doe-eyed young hunk
pronging him relentlessly, had never been so happy.  The deeper he thrust,
the more Steve's eyes seem to sparkle.  Steven began using his hand on
himself to make Jeffrey's fuck even more perfect.  Jeff was just thinking
how the shock of golden hair which had fallen across Steve's brown set off
his gleaming teeth, when he felt a shudder come from the depths of his
soul.

  Rising relentlessly, not to be turned back at last, Jeffrey's insides
emptied themselves deep into Steve's ready ass as Steve's handiwork
revealed itself on his belly and chest.  Again and again, the two pounded
together, completely out of control, screaming like those possessed, while
all that had come before became meaningless and all that was to come opened
up before them.

  Almost too exhausted to breathe, Jeffrey finally pulled himself free and
collapsed on top of Steven, letting their love juices merge even as had
their souls.  Neither one doubted that the future had anything but delight
in store for them as they drifted off to a well-deserved sleep in mutual
embrace.

  Later, Jeff reached over and slid his hand across the taut musculature of
Steve's tanned ass, cupping the mounds in his hand and massaging them...

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