By Martin Clement
Unless otherwise noted, this story is Copyright 2006 by Martin Clement for Clement & Boule Associates. All rights reserved. No part of this story may be reproduced, published, distributed, displayed, performed, copied or stored for public or private use in any information retrieval system, or transmitted in any form by any mechanical, photographic or electronic process, including electronically or digitally on the Internet or World Wide Web, or over any network, or local area network, without written permission of the author. No part of this story may be modified or changed or exploited in any way used for derivative works, or offered for sale, or used to construct any kind of database or mirrored at any other location without the express written permission of the author. Thank you for respecting the intellectual property rights protected by the copyright laws of Canada, the United States and International Copyright Treaty.
This story is a work of fiction. All the events and characters depicted in this story are parts of the imagination of the author only. Any similarity to real people, living or dead, or any event that might have occurred in reality should be considered as purely coincidental.
The Lost Magic
I didn't know what to think anymore. There on the front porch of the house stood Jerome looking like I could never have imagined one day I would see him. He looked shy. Or was it shame? All I knew was that I didn't like it. My heart instantly fell. Where had his self confident, even a bit cocky, attitude left to? The man with all this charisma, the man with all these pheromones sparkling all around him, the man who had told me to focus on him without flinching as I had let my soul penetrate his gaze when I was lying on the sidewalk seemed to have reverted to a little boy right in front of my eyes. He was a mess. It seemed as though he had forgotten to shave in the morning. His usually so extravagant spiky hair was now hidden under a baseball cap. Everything that seemed to make his charm had now lost its shine. Whatever had happened to him must have been awful. I flinched at the realization that I probably had something to do with that. He stood there with his hands in his pockets, looking at my feet like a little lost boy. I wanted to hug him, comfort him and tell him everything would be alright, but I was too afraid any of the action I would try might scare him. The way he had freaked the day before had been painful enough and I couldn't stand him being in pain.
"Jerome?" I think my voiced cracked on his name. I really didn't like seeing him like this. Hearing his name, he slowly lifted his head and his gaze found mine. All the magic that still was in his eyes the day before had vanished. The dark pools of his eyes had lost their heat. He seemed so lost, so far away from his own self it was terrifying. He was hurt I could tell, since I was too, witnessing him experiencing this horrible pain. I stepped to the side, leaving space so he could enter the house. "Do you want to come in?" I asked in a whispered voice.
"Who is it?" I heard the loud and cheerful voice of Janie who was coming our way. It startled Jerome who took one step back from the door. It took all of my will not to reach for him and pull him in an embrace, wishing for him to heal. "Oh!" Janie stopped in her track when she saw Jerome there on the porch.
"It's for me, Janie." I said calmly, hoping she wouldn't get any closer. I was afraid that if he felt as though he was too crowded he would disappear in a flash and never come back. I couldn't have it. As long as he was here in front of me, he was safe. Looking as terrible as he did, I was afraid anything might happen if he left the security of my sight. I would take care of him.
"Okay..." she barely said. "I'll... I'll go back to the kitchen. I'm sorry," she managed to articulate.
"You don't have to be sorry, Janie. It's your house," I said, my eyes not leaving Jerome's. "I think we'll just go and talk in my room."
"Okay... you do that. I'll be in the kitchen if you need anything."
Janie simply turned on her heels and went back to what she was doing before the doorbell had rung. I'd have to thank her again for that. Now I knew where Valerie had found her good manners with things that were not concerning her. I really was starting to like the woman, since she really had nothing in common with my father. Maybe Valerie had told her I was not to be mothered before she brought me there but I doubted it had been necessary since Janie didn't act in any superior way at all, even with her own daughter. She knew we were both adults and that probably was enough for her not to interfere with our privacy. She would be an incredible friend if she happened to want me as one. I'd sure try my best at it. As now she had lost a bit of her shine seeing the state Jerome was in, and probably kicking herself for intruding, I would have to make it up to her by making her smile again. She had an incredible smile. It would be a loss not being able to see it again.
Jerome still was there on the porch, and his eyes had drifted from my eyes and resumed staring at my feet. He hadn't moved yet, possibly startled by the intrusion that never came. Now I had to get him to accept coming into my room, which could be a hard task, considering it had all started there. I took a few steps back, thinking that maybe he was afraid I would touch him. That simple thought hurt me. I knew he was scared. I could feel it. I was too.
"Are you coming in?" I asked, my voice barely higher than a whisper. "I promise I won't do anything stupid."
His eyes never left the ground and he stayed motionless for a couple more seconds. He sighed so deeply that if his shoulders hadn't already been down, they would definitely have slumped. When he finally walked through the open door, I securely closed it after him. I was glad all the heat from the house hadn't left by the open door. Jerome silently sat down on a chair and slowly took his coat and boots off. Relief probably was radiating from my face as I exhaled a whole breath of air. He was finally here in the safety of the house. He had done the first step. Now my job consisted in giving him all the comfort he might have needed and try to fulfill the promise I had made to myself not to freak him out again.
I went through the open door to my room and sure enough, Jerome followed me a couple of steps behind, looking everywhere as if something could jump and attack him anytime. I was walking on eggshells there. Any movement from me that he would have interpreted the wrong way might have meant his departure. And I would have beaten myself to death had it happened again.
I was there in the corner of the room about to close the door when I felt Jerome approaching me cautiously. Careful for not doing any movement that would be too abrupt for him, I turned around until I faced him. He took another step closer, so I didn't move, just letting him come to me. I didn't know what was about to happen but whatever it was, I would let it happen. Even if it killed me. He came so close I could feel his heat through the thick fabric of his sweatshirt and his smooth mixed breath of vanilla and mint on my face. He was shaking so much I was afraid he would fall apart right in front of me. He didn't stop until his chest touched mine and once it was done, his trembling arms tentatively found their own way around my shoulders. It seemed as though he had held his breath all through his approach, afraid I might have rejected him as when he engulfed me in a shaking hug, his arms holding tightly around my shoulders and his face buried in the crook of my neck, I felt what seemed to be years of pressure and sadness leaving his lungs in a long breath. As his body was freeing itself from that exceeding distress that was now too heavy for him to carry alone anymore, it felt as if he were getting smaller in my arms even though he still was much bigger than I was. He had taken me by surprise and my head needed time to register what exactly was happening. I had been hurt also, even though I was the only responsible of my own pain. But when I heard him sniff and felt moisture on my skin, I blinked once and felt silent tears burning my cheeks. My heart instantly dropped lower than the wooden floor and shattered into pieces. His own heart was beating so fast in his ribcage I was afraid It might explode. My whole body and soul listened to his heartbeat and I could finally set myself free from my frozen state. When I moved my arm so I could close the door to protect our privacy and get rid of my cane, he tightened his grip on me, afraid maybe that I would try to break the hold. I heard him sobbing softly in my ear and it felt as if millions of needles had pierced their way right through my heart. I managed to close the door while I circled his waist with one of my arms just so he knew I was going nowhere. When it was done, I carefully slid my free hand up between his shoulder blades for comfort. Then I simply stood there and let him cry on my shoulder in the middle of my room while rubbing his back with my soothing hands. He was so smooth it hurt. I wanted him so bad it was painful keeping him in my arms. I knew I would get burned if I kept on shredding my heart to pieces like that. I had to break the hug if I wanted to protect my sanity. But I couldn't do so. He felt so good there in my arms... that my pain could wait. Me holding him while he cried seemed to be what Jerome needed and as painful as it was just being there for him and forgetting my own emotions, I couldn't say anything as it was no time for words. Communication had started by Jerome's initiative and I would leave it up to him to change our mode of communication when he felt it was time. I just stood there even though my back was starting to hurt, since the hurt I was feeling pouring from Jerome's body and into mine seemed almost unbearable. And I didn't know what exactly was the source of his pain. I knew it had something to do with me at some point but I was still ignorant about the width of my responsibility into it. So I just stood there and let him cry, trying my best to let him know I was there for him.
"Don't tell me he's asleep!" came Valerie's voice from the hall. I had totally forgotten about her. It seemed as though hearing her voice hadn't bothered Jerome at all, still engulfed in my arms.
"I don't think so. He's talking with a friend of his," came a whispered voice that I recognized as Janie. Jerome went stiff hearing her talking about a friend of mine, knowing she was talking about him. At least, he had stopped crying at this point. He didn't let go of me.
"A friend of his? Talking?" That was Valerie. "What are they talking about?"
"You'll know Valerie Gauthier that I'm not a spy!" Janie said in mock indignation then snorted.
"Who's that friend?" Valerie asked.
"Now who's the curious one?" Janie replied. I heard a stifled laugh coming from the head on my shoulder. It was good to hear Jerome laugh again, even though it was still very sad. "Now why don't you present me to your friend?"
"Oh yes! Mom, this my friend Damian. Damian, this is the witch of the house."
Damian seemed to find the witch joke quite funny as I heard him laugh. But I could also feel Jerome tense in our embrace. His arms reluctantly disentangled from my shoulders and he stood in front of me. I had been afraid all along this special moment between him and I that a rise in my pants would happen and destroy the comfort we'd been sharing. I was glad though I'd been too nervous for it to occur. His eyes were cast down to my chest close to his and hidden by his cap. I couldn't bear not to see his eyes. The noise from the hall slowly vanished as Janie, Valerie and Damian went further into the house.
"Jerome..." I whispered but received no answer. "I need to sit down."
Jerome's head lifted up until his eyes reached my mouth and he nodded. He gave me his arm for support and led the way through my room. Still the gentleman... He sat down on the bed, so I decided it would be best if I sat on the chair, facing him. I really didn't want to freak him up as the day before. But when I was about to take my seat, I found his tired eyes staring into mine and he lightly tapped the space beside him on the bed with his hand, inviting me to sit beside him.
"Jerome..." I mumbled. He tapped the bed some more. "Are you sure?" I asked.
I slowly sat by his side.
I don't know how things may have gone so fast but I was not even comfortably seated when I felt one of Jerome's arms on my back, his other hand sliding to my neck and through my hair and his lips pressing softly against mine. He had lost his cap in the process and his magnificent eyes were closed, hidden behind a curtain of dark lashes.
It was not what you could call a perfect kiss as I was a novice at kissing. It was far from perfect as we knocked teeth and I almost poked my nose into his eye once. It was nothing like you read in those fairytales Valerie liked so much.
It was my kiss though.
It was ours.
It was my first kiss and I would never forget it.
So I invested all of myself in that kiss...
Everything I was...
All I wanted to say while our lips were locked together and my tongue was intertwined with his...
We were both shaking so much I was afraid the bed wouldn't be strong enough and would crumble under our weight. I knew this might have been our first and last kiss. The pain of knowing that fact made my stomach churn and my heart tighten as if it was being squashed by an invisible hand.
But this kiss was all I really wanted...
It was all I needed from this magic and tender moment...
It was our new mode of communication and I would not have interrupted this exchange for anything in the whole world.
Not even the distance that separated our two worlds would have been enough to make me break contact...
Even the differences between our social status couldn't have separated our lips...
I would enjoy and suffer, suffer and enjoy that magic moment from the gods and demons as long as my stranger would let me...
I would live and die for that kiss...
I would climb mountains for it...
I would fly...
Fly away with that kiss from my stranger...
Fly on the wings of the time...
If I could slow down the course of time...
Just so I could feel this ecstasy...
Just so I could feel this ecstasy forever...
I would try and feel this ecstasy forever here in Jerome's arms...
If time couldn't be slowed down...
Then I'd invest all of my being...
I'd make anything possible...
So I could come back to that very moment...
Without breaking the kiss nor the embrace, Jerome gently laid me on the bed and came to lie partly over my body. I remembered the day before when he freaked out so I let go of my grip on him in case he'd want to break free. His lips let go of mine a moment and he opened up his eyes so they would reach mine. The pain was still there. But there was something more now in his gaze.
He wanted me.
I could feel his erection pressing on my thigh...
I was sure he could feel mine too.
His quivering lips were slightly parted and I could feel his breath on my lips. He frowned. I thought our magic moment had been broken for a split second, but when I felt his hand touch mine, his fingers intertwining with mine, burning my hand with his touch... when I saw his eyes close again and his mouth fall back on my lips... I finally understood the meaning of the communication from his eyes. I closed mine...
We resumed our kiss.
He had reassured me.
My free hand found its way to the base of his neck and my fingers drew trails in his hair, our lips never breaking contact. We kissed for a long time before Jerome laid his head on me, finding comfort on my shoulder.
Soon, I realized by the slowing rate of his breathing and the faint snoring close to my ear that Jerome had fallen asleep in my arms. All these emotions that we had shared for the last hour or so had drained him. Hearing the beat of his heart connecting with mine, I slowly continued stroking his head through his hair a little more.
Tatum... Tatum... This heartbeat was so precious...
Tatum... Tatum... A whole life was contained in that sound...
Tatum... Tatum... No soul could survive without that rhythm...
Tatum... Tatum... And without its soul, a body would be an empty shell...
Tatum...Tatum... With no interest at all...
Tatum...Tatum... Jerome was sleeping in my arms...
Tatum...Tatum... Trusting in me...
Tatum...Tatum... Leaving his heart under my care...
Tatum...Tatum... There was no more fabulous gift on earth for me...
Tatum...Tatum... Than being chosen to become the guardian of his heart.
I tighten my grip around his body, this complex machine keeping his incredible soul alive. I embraced his heart, thanking it for every single one of its beating.
I stayed in that position for an eternity, which probably was not much more than fifteen minutes, trying to register what had just happened here in that room. I felt the urge to pinch myself but the presence of that sleeping body so close to mine was enough to tell me I hadn't been dreaming.
I was scared though.
I was terrified at the simple idea it might have been the only kiss we'd ever share.
I was afraid that he would wake up and freak out like he had done the day before, finding himself entangled with me on the bed.
I didn't want to leave him, but I had to if I wanted Jerome not to feel weird when he woke up.
I slowly freed myself from his grasp. It was a painful task since I had to twist my back a little so I wouldn't wake him up. It was even more painful as I wanted, I needed to stay there in his arms. When I was finally able to stand up, I saw Jerome's body curl into a ball, looking more like a small child who lost his teddy bear than the man he really was. He seemed so alone it hurt. I wanted nothing more than go back to bed and hold him some more. I unfolded a thick comforter that was sated on the arm of the chair near the bed and tucked him in it before I made my way to the door. There I retrieved my cane and reached for the handle. I inhaled deeply and exhaled before I exited the room, closing the door silently behind me without looking back, and made my way to the kitchen.
"Howdy young man!" I heard Damian's cheerful voice say as soon as I entered the room.
"Where's your friend?" Valerie asked, looking at my tangled hair. I rapidly brushed it with my fingers.
"Will he be staying for dinner?" Janie said from her cauldron. "Damian is staying and there's still enough for a small army in there."
"He... He's not feeling well..." I mumbled.
"Is everything alright?"
"I guess so. He's sleeping right now so..."
"Well I'll save a part of everything for him so you could bring him a plate later on." Janie looked at me with caring eyes. I smiled my gratitude and nodded. She gave me a faint smile and I understood everything would be alright.
"Who is it?" Valerie asked.
"What?" I asked, as if it would make the question mark in Valerie's face disappear.
"Who's your friend? Do I know him?"
"Can we just drop this subject?" I said while pointing my stare at Damian who seemed to have fun peeling potatoes. "It was a bit straining and I'd like to vent a bit of the pressure." I think Valerie took my hint as her eyes popped and her mouth hung slightly open. She quickly looked at Damian and then back at me.
"Okay," she finally said.
Dinner was excellent and the two bottles of Chateau Medoc didn't last very long. It was the first time I was sharing a real dinner with people without anybody watching the news on the tube. I finally could understand the usual adage saying that kitchen was the center of the house in Quebec province. I had a good time with Valerie and these other people I was starting to consider as friends. Too bad Jerome missed it though since I was sure had the situation been different, he would have entertained us as much as we did to each other around the table. Janie never tried to impose her family albums with stupid and embarrassing naked baby pictures of Valerie. Actually, she did nothing to embarrass her in any way. She was just being a friend, making her best so thoughts about any unwanted kind of hierarchy in this house had vanished into thin air before they even appeared. The mother wasn't at our table and as you could feel that incredible bond between mother and daughter Valerie and Janie were sharing, you would have thought they simply were very good friends. Which they actually were. I was sure there was no hypocrisy in their relationship as I had seen in so many families before with children wanting to hit their parents whenever they met, but who plastered fake smiles on their faces hoping for the torture to be over soon... and finding any reason to leave early.
"I'll clean the table," I said as I stood after the incredible meal and good wine while enjoying each other's company. We had been sitting there for almost two hours and I felt like moving.
"I'll help you!" came Damian's voice.
"Not at all!" came Janie's voice. "You're very sweet, both of you. But Damian, you are a guest. I'll never accept for a guest to clean anything in my house. Valerie, why don't you bring this gentleman to the living room and prepare us some of your famous Grasshoppers*?" she winked at her.
"I think I can do that," Valerie replied, leading the way to the living room.
When I started cleaning the table, Janie stopped me.
"You'll do it when your back gets better. I appreciate the offer though. Why don't you go and check up on your friend?" Janie asked with smiley eyes. "I'm sure he must be hungry. I'll do the cleaning. There's not much to do anyway. I have a dishwasher, you know! Go see how your friend's doing. And as if you didn't already know... you are home here. So it means you don't have to ask for anything, you understand?"
I nodded and smiled. Janie took a tray with a plate and a glass of wine and followed me to my room. Careful not to break into Jerome's privacy, she left the tray on the nightstand and left not even looking his way. As soon as the door had closed behind Janie, Jerome started to wake up, stirring his body like a cat. I turned a small office lamp on so he wouldn't be startled by the bright ceiling light.
"Hi..." he said, yawning, his eyes finding mine and a shy smile appearing on his lips. His voice was raspy.
"Hi..." I said tentatively. "I brought you something to eat."
"What time is it?" he asked, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes.
"You tell Valerie's mother I'm sorry..."
"There's no problem, okay?" I said. He nodded and looked me in the eyes. "You even could stay the night if you wanted." I wanted to kiss him so bad... But I didn't want him to freak. I wanted him to know that everything that counted for me was his well being.
Jerome sat by the bed rest and scooted a bit then motioned for me to sit by his side. So I obliged.
"Hum... Yannick... You know... what happened tonight..." he sighed.
"Oh no... Here it comes..."
I felt all the pain I had pushed back from my memory come back to me like a brick wall smashing into my face. My chest suddenly felt tight. I crossed my arms over it, covering my broken heart, closing myself from the world, trying to regain my dignity but the hurt was so horrible that I couldn't contain the cry coming out from my whole body. I started to stand up. I wanted to go and bury myself where nobody would be able to see me when I felt his hand touch my arm. I shrugged it off. But as I was seated on the side of the bed trying to stand up, I felt Jerome's hand grab my arm, stopping me.
"Hey..." he said. "Please, Yannick, stay with me."
"I'm sorry, Jerome. I just can't..." I whispered.
"Yannick..." he sighed. "Look at me."
"I should have known..."
"What are you talking about?"
I turned around to face him. I didn't want him to see my tears... but I had to make him understand that this game was too much for me. I had comforted him for hours and held him while he cried on my shoulder. Then he had kissed me. He had fallen asleep in my arms and made me the guardian of his heart for a brief moment. I already knew then that the possibility of it being the only kiss we would share in this life was higher than the one of having a chance with Jerome.
My hands were white from their grips on my arms and my eyes were tightly closed in a way to shut the world out. He knew I liked him. He knew it and he had still kissed me. Far away in my head, I had known this kiss didn't mean the same thing for him than it did for me. But still, I had wished the fairytale could be mine once upon my life... My hands went to my face to hide the tears that were leaking from my eyes. I must have been an awful sight.
"Yannick, please, don't cry," Jerome said, his voice barely higher than a whisper. "Let me tell you that I like you... You're a great person, Yannick. I really like you."
"I know what you'll say, Jerome, so save it!" I snapped through my sobs. "I like you, Yannick, but... It's the greatest classic!" I exclaimed, laughing sadly.
There was an awkward moment of silence between us. It was uncomfortable. Humiliating. I suddenly felt naked crying there. I felt like a bright red flashing light had found residence over my head.
"What do you think you know?" he finally asked.
"You'll probably say you only kissed me because you wanted to make me feel good? That you didn't mean to go this far? Well let me tell you that I don't actually feel good at all!"
"You didn't like it?" He made a pause, waiting for an answer that wouldn't come since we both knew the question was a stupid one. "I thought that you felt good... It felt good to me..."
"You obviously don't know how it made me feel..." I turned my head so he could see my teary eyes. "It felt good kissing you, Jerome. It felt really good. But I knew deep inside that you probably didn't feel it as much as I did."
"That's not true, Yannick. I liked it... I like you..." he said, his eyes dropping to his lap, "but even if I do... Yannick... I live in Florida..."
"And I live here..."
"Isn't it a good enough reason?"
He seemed startled by this simple answer and his eyes met mine.
"No." I took a deep breath that I exhaled slowly, trying to regain my temper. It seemed to work as there were no more sobs in my voice when I spoke. "We barely know each other, I know that. You're still so mysterious to me... We have a lot of things going on in our lives by now. We won't die tomorrow, Jerome. We still have time. When you leave next week-end, it doesn't mean we just have to forget all this happened. We wouldn't... if you only wanted to consider it." I stood. "But obviously you don't."
"What do you want from me, Yannick?"
"I don't want anything from you that you don't want to share."
"So you think it could work? How?"
"I don't know, Jerome. Not yet. But I want to get to know you more. I want to know where this could lead us to. I want to be able to make the right decisions about my life. I'm tired of being obliged to fail at every attempt at being happy I make just because everybody keeps on telling me that I can't get what I want, that it's not worth the try. I'm sick about that. I don't know how it could work. I honestly don't know. But I don't want to believe that it can't when I hadn't tried my best for it to work. If I accept that I had failed without trying, then, I'm just a coward."
"So you think I'm a coward then?" Jerome asked in a mild irritated tone.
"If you say so."
"Well thank you!" he said, getting angry.
"You're welcome." I sighed. "Jerome... it's not being a coward telling me you don't like me the way I do to you. You know, I didn't ask you to kiss me. I was about to sit on the chair but you wanted me to sit with you on the bed. I didn't instigate that kiss. It was you. I like you, Jerome. And you knew that before you kissed me. And now you hurt me. I didn't think you'd do that to me. I thought I could trust you."
"You don't trust me?"
"How can I? The only things you let me know about you are what you want to show me. Now it looks as though you came to Montreal on vacation and I'm being the entertainment that you'll cherish in a photo album."
"You're not a vacation souvenir, Yannick."
"Then prove it! If you like me, then help me here! Be on the same team as me! Fight for me! Because now I'm confused."
"We don't live in a fairytale, Yannick!"
"Thank you for reminding me."
"You don't really know me."
"Then tell me who the hell you are!" I yelled, turning back so I could face him in the eyes. "The two worlds we are living in are just in our heads! It's just physical, Jerome! It's superficial!" I calmed down. "You know, I was thinking the same thing before. I thought these two worlds really existed. But let me tell you that today, when I felt your heart beating against mine, when I felt you crying on my shoulder, when we kissed..." I had to catch my breath before I fell into another fit of tears. "When we kissed, I felt that this barrier only was some kind of obstacle that was waiting for us to break. And when I felt you falling asleep in my arms, I thought it was where I belonged. I know I don't really know you, Jerome, but if we don't give it a try, then I'll never know if it was or was not worth it."
"You're talking like my brother."
"Well you should listen to him sometimes."
"What do you mean?" he asked. "If you're talking about that infatuation he has for your friend..." I couldn't hear what he was about to say, so I cut him up.
"You really think it's infatuation? Then he's a very good comedian. We were together the whole afternoon, me and him. We went shopping together. He was constantly talking about Valerie and I could tell it was not only infatuation he had for her when he told me he liked her."
"He told you that?"
"And you trusted him?"
"I don't trust in appearances, if that's what you think about. It was not only his words but his soul talking. Your brother is not as superficial as you'd like him to be."
"And you're always right, I presume?"
I couldn't hear anymore of that, so I grabbed my cane and walked to the door.
"Yannick!" I could feel Jerome starting to panic. "Wait!" I stopped, the handle in my hand.
"Eat. It will get cold."
"But where are you going?"
"Where do you think? I think you've been clear enough."
"But it's your room!"
"Keep it for tonight. I surely can find a way to go up that stair. Anyway... now I have to make sure Valerie is safe."
"Well... since you've finally convinced me that Damian was no good for her, I have to go and tell her to be cautious. I wouldn't want him to break her heart the way you're breaking mine."
"Please, Yannick, come back here. I'm sorry, okay?" He was on the verge of tears. "I didn't mean what I said... and you're right, Damian probably does like Valerie."
"I know that. Don't bother... I was not going to interfere between you and your brother. And I'm not enough of a jerk to tell Damian that you're here either. I'm not the kind of guy to create family messes. You can do it all by yourselves, and it's none of my business. My own experience with family told me that much."
"Don't leave me, please..." Now he was crying. I had to fight the urge to run to the bed and hold him in my arms. It was hard just to keep my composure. But I couldn't just forget that he had made me feel like a toy.
"Why? So you can play with me and leave me heartbroken when you go back to your world and forget all about me? If you want that kind of adventure, there are plenty of night clubs full of superficial guys who are just waiting for one night stands. You're gorgeous. You shouldn't have any problem finding one. But sorry, with me you've got the wrong number. I'm just not that kind of guy. Me, I'll wait for the real thing."
"I don't want them either!" He yelled through his tears. "I want you!"
"Then fuckin' prove it!" I screamed.
I lost my balance and was thrown to the wall then tumbled down to the floor as the door to the room swung opened and Damian ran inside, closely followed by a worried Janie and a very apologizing Valerie. The impact sent jolts of pain through my back and I couldn't breathe anymore. Damian rushed down to me.
"Yannick, are you al..." he stopped dead in the middle of his sentence as his eyes drifted to the bed. "Jerome?"
To be continued...
* Grasshopper: Night cap made of green mint cream, white cocoa liquor and milk, shaken on ice and served foamy, with or without the ice in a balloon glass. The appellation comes from the color association between the drink and the animal of the same name. See The New York Bartender's Guide by Sally Ann Burk for more details and other recipes. Perfect guide for beginners at bartending.
Note from the author
This story is treating about friendship, romance, betrayal, forgiveness, acceptance, pain and healing. There might be some intense scenes of passion but you won't find any explicit scene. I don't have anything against eroticism in itself as I have read a lot of very nice erotic stories on Nifty and elsewhere. As the main characters will try and survive their pain, trying to lead their lives into a world full of resentment, I rather give them the peace and privacy of a closed door than failing at the attempt at explaining a theory of their sexual intercourses. That way, as this story will be told at the first person, if you feel as immersing yourself inside the head of the characters, you'll be able to forge your own version and images of their sexuality without me interfering with my own generic ideas about eroticism.
Feedbacks are the fuel of my writing and the pay check I don't get for sharing my stories for free with my readers. If you like the story, send me an e-mail at the address that you'll find at the bottom of the page. Constructive comments always are appreciated. Please write the title of the story in the Object case so I don't accidentally delete your messages with the Spam I receive.
If you don't like this story, please feel free to leave and read something else that will suit your desires, because I won't take any flame while sharing something as precious for me as my talent to write stories. We are millions of writers and I'm sure you'll find something that will spark your interest.
Read my other story: Hate