Date: Fri, 20 Feb 2009 13:14:00 -0800 (PST)
From: John Venn <johnvenn1945@yahoo.co.uk>
Subject: Angelus

Disclaimer:

This story contains scenes of a sexual nature between men and boys. If this
is not to your taste, or is illegal where you live, or you find it morally
offensive, then read no further and leave now!! The story is purely
imaginary and bears no resemblance to any living person or persons as far
as I know, much as you or I might wish!

Other stories of mine may be found under 'Prolific Authors' at Nifty.
Comments are always welcome at johnvenn1945@yahoo.co.uk

*******************************************************

Angelus
by
Alexander

Before I start my story properly, I need to explain that I am writing in a
language I was not born to speak. I was born in Britannia many seasons ago
but for most of my life have lived in Rome, or close by. The language I
speak and write now is called Latin, but there are some words I don't know
in this strange tongue and so I have no choice but use almost forgotten
words from my distant childhood sometimes. If I offend you by my ignorance,
then please forgive my lack of brains, the fault is mine.

My home, such as it was, where I was born was a poor farm in what we called
Dover but the Romans called Dubri: the last time I saw it was the day the
tax collector came to take our annual tribute. My father had nothing to
give as we'd eaten what little we grew and were still starving, living on
nuts and berries from the woods around us and the few rabbits we could
catch. My father and the tax gatherer argued for a long time with lots of
bad words exchanged, but it was no good. Suddenly I was grabbed around the
waist and thrown into a wagon alongside a dozen other boys and girls I knew
only by sight. The last thing I remember was my mother, sobbing bitterly,
looking from my father to me in terror.

After a long journey and dispiriting journey we came to Dover harbour where
a ship bigger than any house I have ever seen stood waiting for us. Meekly
we lined up to be counted on board.

"Nomen?" the man said as I stood before him when it was my turn, not even
bothering to look at me.

I remained silent. I knew what he meant - he wanted me to tell him my name,
but I didn't know it. At home I was always called 'boy' or 'you' or
'kid'. I couldn't remember being called anything else. Just at that moment
a falcon swept down from the sky and seized a rabbit from the field,
startling us. Shrugging his shoulders the man said, " Peregrinus.
Traveller." and wrote it down.  "Aetas? Age?" he asked.

Again, I had no idea other than that I was born in the spring after a cold
winter.

Without a pause, he lifted up my shirt and stared at my prick and bollocks
unashamedly.

"Decima," he began to write, then after another look he felt my balls and
said, "undecim." I watched as he wrote "11" down on his wax tablet.

The next thing I knew was that I, together with all the others in my
company, were taken deep inside the ship and manacled with iron chains

Fort the next two weeks I was in the depths of despair. I'd lost my mother
and father, my home and even my country. I was fed on the thinnest of gruel
and only saw the sun when allowed into the fresh air for a few minutes each
day. Even then I was afraid as the only thing I could see was water - not a
piece of land anywhere in sight and it scared me beyond belief.  My hair,
my clothes and even my skin became verminous, the lice and other pests
serving only to give me extra food when I could find and catch them.

One or two of the boys were released from their manacles once in a while
and taken away.  The stories they told when they came back some hours later
were difficult to believe. They said that they had been taken to where the
sailors sleep and made to do things that I had never heard of before: even
the cattle in the fields didn't do the things they said had happened to
them. I could tell they were telling the truth though because I saw the
marks and bruises between their legs and on their arses. They tried to take
me once or twice, but the big man who was guarding us wouldn't let them,
saying that I was too valuable to be taken just for their pleasure.

Time, thankfully, has erased most details of that sea voyage, the
privations and despondency I suffered long since consigned to the past. It
was at Ostia, the port of Rome that my new life really started.

I, together with the other boys on my ship followed the captain onto the
shore. We were so dispirited and disheartened that we couldn't care less
what he had in mind for us, even death would have been welcomed, such was
our state of mind.

Instead of meeting our maker though, we were led to a giant stone building
guarded and locked tight against intruders. Once inside we were forced to
stand together in a huddle whilst the captain and a big, greasy,
dark-skinned man stared at us and argued. After a while the captain was
given a bag of coins and left, without once looking back at us.

Then began the most degrading thing that had happened in my life. The man,
who I guessed to be our new master, signalled to his chief helper. Before
we knew what was happening, he'd torn off the few rags that protected our
modesty and left us standing as naked as the day we were born. Without
exception, we all put our hands down to hide our balls and pricks from
sight.

The men (thankfully there were no women or girls to observe our shame) all
laughed and pointed at us. The big guard man walked around, hitting us with
a whip until we were all stood with our hands behind our backs, leaving our
bodies open to be viewed by anyone who cared to look.

The two men then began to inspect us intimately. One by one we had our
eyes, ears, teeth and muscles looked at. Some of the boys were taken away
after being examined, others like me were left behind.

By the time they's finished there were just eight of us left, the biggest
about a season older than me, the youngest no more than six or seven
harvests old. We looked at each other uneasily, wondering why we'd been
kept back.

>From the far corner of the yard a big table was carried in by yet more
servants and placed in front of us. This wasn't for eating from though as
it had a big hole in the middle of it and leather straps all round it.

We watched nervously as the biggest boy amongst us was led to the table and
tied down on it with the straps, his arms and legs making a cross
shape. The servant man checked the ties and then suddenly tried to stick
his finger between the arse cheeks of the tied-down boy. The boy screamed
in agony as the finger tried to enter him through his private place. It
only stopped when the servant showed his master a bloodied finger and a
sign saying he was alright. Once this was done, the helper man pushed a
piece of wood and the table moved so it stood upright.

Now he was in a sort of standing position, but still tied to the table, the
only thing showing to us was his prick and balls, dangling limply through
the hole in the table. The man took the prick in his fingers and felt it
until it got hard and stood out through middle of the big hole.

I'd seen he-goats get like this at home and had even got like it myself
once or twice. The only thing it meant to me was that if it was put it
inside a she-goat you got new goats after a long time, and that it was the
same for everything with a prick, like me.

I'd also seen my father take a he-goat's prick in his fingers to make it
hard and then push it inside a she-goat to help them, but as I stared
around, I couldn't see a girl or woman for the boy anywhere, and yet the
man still held the boy's prick and stroked it faster and faster until the
boy shouted out, and something came out of his prick. It wasn't piss
because it was the wrong colour, and there wasn't much of it. After this,
the boy was taken away to go with the other boys.

Next was the boy two away from me, and they did just the same to him, but
no matter how hard the man tried, he couldn't make his prick shoot out the
stuff. He was untied and left to stay with us.

Before the next boy to me was taken, I saw that he was shaking and
shivering in fright, his prick already getting bigger.

As I watched, I worked out that they were only taking away the ones that
could make the stuff shoot out. I knew that I'd done it once or twice in my
sleep before and thought nothing too much of it except that I was growing
into a man. Now it seemed that it was important that I didn't make it come
when he stroked me.

I stared as the boy was played with, watching every move either of them
made. It didn't take very long for the boy to shoot out his seed. For some
reason, my own prick had got hard watching all this, and as the boy lost
his stuff, I felt that my own cock had made it as well, most of it shooting
out and falling on to the ground in front of me. I quickly covered it over
with sand to hide it in case the man saw it.

The finger, trying to get inside my shithole gave me a lot of pain, more
than I thought possible, but the man seemed happy with that. It was only
when he turned the table I got scared.

Since my seed had come just a few minutes ago, it took the man ages to make
me hard again, and when he did, I just didn't have any more left to shoot
out. With a sign to the fat man, I was untied and left to join the others.

For the next two weeks we were treated well on the whole, with clean
clothes, a hot bath every day and good food. As time went by, all the bite
marks and bruises on our bodies disappeared and we looked and felt
better. I also discovered that I had a gift for learning their language and
the man who was in charge of us taught me a few words, it was called Latin.
What he wouldn't, or couldn't, tell us though was why we were here and what
was to become of us.

As we got fitter and better looking we had visitors come to see us once in
a while who looked at us as if we were pieces of meat to be bought and
sold. Some of the older boys we'd been separated from were taken away in
exchange for money, to work in the market or on the farms we were told..

Doriskos, the man who took care of us, seemed to take a liking to me and we
often sat in the shade, teaching each other a few words of our
languages. It seems he too was a slave who had been captured many seasons
before and had been sold to the man who owned us now.  Doriskos used to
like watching us take our daily baths, making sure we cleaned ourselves
properly, especially round our pricks and balls. When I was little, being
seen without any clothes on was the height of shame, but here in Rome, it
was an everyday thing and we often saw the other boys and men naked when
they were taking exercise or washing. It took me a long time, but
eventually I got used to it, especially when Doriskos used to stand me
naked between his legs and play with my prick until it got hard and stood
up for him. When he did it the first time and my seed came out, he looked
at me strangely and shook his head. I'd done something wrong, but he didn't
tell me what. It didn't stop him playing with me every day though, and he
never told anyone else about it.

He would tell me how beautiful I was, and how one day I would make somebody
very happy.  I didn't understand all he said, but it made me feel very
good, especially when he changed my name from Peregrinus Anglicus which
meant 'traveller from England' to Peregrinus Angelus, which meant
'travelling angel'.

I was quite happy living as I did and gave no thought to the future - as
far as I was concerned it would be like this for ever. One day, however,
Doriskos came in to tell us that we were not allowed to have any food for
two days. He didn't explain why, but he seemed to be very sad when he
played with me in the bath that day and made me spill my seed twice.. He'd
never done that before.

On the third day, I learned to my horror why we'd been starved. Doriskos
came into our chamber and with tears in his eyes explained that we were to
be gelded - castrated he called it.  I'd seen this done to the oxen and
pigs at home and knew exactly what he meant. My balls shrivelled up at the
thought and my mind went blank in fright.

When it was my turn I was dragged screaming and shouting into the shed
where I was to be cut. In a last, desperate plea I threw myself at the feet
of the men and sobbed for them to let me go. They laughed and grabbed me,
making me stare at the blood-covered table with its leather straps, and the
sharp knives as one of my friends was gelded.

The last thing I remember before I fainted as the knife cut off my balls
was Doriskos whispering to the man with the knife and slipping a coin into
his hand.

People say that the pain of childbirth is the worst pain ever, but it is
the way of the world that women are able to bear it. For me, the
excruciating agony I suffered will live with me for ever, only death will
erase it from my mind. Even now, at my advanced age, I still have
nightmares seeing the bright shiny knife slice into my balls just before I
pass out.

For days and days I lay in my cot drifting in and out of consciousness,
with no one except Doriskos to hold my hand or to make the pain go away. It
was he who carefully cleaned my wound for me and covered it with a
sweet-smelling paste twice a day, unlike the other boys who were tended by
a dirty old hag. Two boys actually got so poorly that they died under her
care, for which she was soundly beaten I was glad to hear.

As the pain gradually went away, I was able to put my hand down to my
crotch and cry as I felt my prick, without its accompanying balls. I wished
it'd ben me that had died.

It wasn't until Doriskos took me for my first bath that I was able to take
a look at myself and feel the place where my balls had been. I stared in
disbelief and began to cry again. Doriskos took me in his arms and hugged
me gently, letting me sob into his neck. Once I'd cried myself out, he
pushed me away from him and stood me between his legs as he used to.
Taking my prick in between his fingers, he rubbed it softly until once more
it got hard and stuck out, pointing at him like it used to.

This made him smile a lot, and grinning, told me how lucky I was. Lifting
his toga up, he showed me his prick and balls. Or at least his prick. He
had no balls either! That made me feel a lot better for some reason and I
managed to give him a little smile in return. Then he pointed to my hard
little prick and played with its hardness. At the same time, he rubbed his
own much bigger prick, but no matter how hard he tried, he couldn't get it
to stand up like mine. At last I understood why he was so happy for me,
although I couldn't understand it.  Much later on, I also learned that some
men were castrated so viciously that they even lost their prick as well and
had to carry a little silver tube with them all the time.

Anyway, Doriskos carried on rubbing and stroking my prick more and more
just like the men did on that awful table with the other boys until I began
to get a strange yet familiar tickly sort of feeling between my legs. I put
my hands on his shoulders to hold me up as I felt I was going to fall down,
but still he kept rubbing. Then, all of a sudden, I started to shake and
tremble all over and I pressed my prick into his hand before falling into
his arms. This made Doriskos even happier for some reason and he embraced
me tightly.

When we were alone, Doriskos explained to me that nearly everyone who was
gelded lost all feeling in their balls and prick and couldn't even make it
hard anymore. I was lucky, he said.  Not only could I get stiff, but I
could have all the feelings a proper man got, it was just that I couldn't
make any seed. "That will make your fortune," he laughed one day as he
stroked me until I got the feeling. When I asked him how and why, he just
shook his head, grinning, and wouldn't tell me.

I'd been in Rome for half a season when we were taken to be auctioned at
the market. For days before we went, we were given extra good food and
extra baths with scented oils in them. On the day we were to be sold, we
even had new clothes to wear.

The market place, or forum as they call it, was busy and crowded. The big
fat man stood all six of us boys on a platform raised high up so everyone
could see us. Then he took all our clothes off and made us walk around in
front of the people. I'd been called Angelus by Doriskos, and as I looked
round at the other boys with me, I realised, without any hubris, that I was
in fact better looking than any of them, which should mean I fetch a better
price and go to a better home. For one thing I was taller by about two
fingers, and my hair was a bright yellow colour. I could feel everyone look
at me, but I was so full of shame at my nakedness that I looked at the sky
and pretended they weren't there.

The first boy to be sold had a little limp and he went quickly for ten
denarii, the others were sold for 15 or 20. I was the last to be offered
for sale and watched as people bid for me. After a while there were only
two men left; one was a fat, ugly man who kept looking at me and licking
his lips. I hoped that he wouldn't win. The other man was tall and thin,
and seemed to be buying me for his wife who was hidden behind curtains in a
litter. At last, the tall man bought me for 35 denarii, nearly twice what
the last boy had got!

As Doriskos helped me dress, he gave me a hug and with tears in his eyes,
wished me luck.

My new owner was a gold and jewel merchant who lived in a big house with
lots of other servants and he'd bought me for his wife who wanted a pretty
page boy to show off to her friends.

Being young, and a eunuch as well, I was placed in the women's quarters to
live. It was they who taught me how to behave and how to look after
myself. We even took our baths together, the women not caring that they
were just as naked as me. It was the first time I'd ever seen a woman
without any clothes on, and it made me very nervous for some reason. They
treated me well though, almost like a pet, and whenever I wasn't out with
the lady of the house, delighted in stroking me and feeding me treats.

The man in charge of the servants was a eunuch too, but he was very fat and
was always eating sweets. I'd learned from Doriskos that some gelded men
got like this as they got older and that I should always take care of my
diet and exercise as much as I could. Rufus, for that was his name because
of his red hair, was a kind man though and took good care of me. He taught
me to read and write as well as speak properly too, explaining that the
language I'd learned from Doriskos and then others was only used by the
common people in the market places and so on. Well bred people used
different words, and if I was to do well for myself I had to learn the way
they spoke. Once again, I found it easy to learn and was soon able to read
and write simple words, learning a lot by listening to my mistress talk and
reading the shop signs and notices posted in the streets.

I'd been a part of the household for a full season when the next big thing
happened to me.  Sometimes, under the cover of the night, I would rub and
stroke my penis (that's the proper word!) Until it got hard and then keep
on doing it until I trembled and shook all over. I never made any seed come
out of course, but the feeling I got made me happy and warm.

One day I was in the bath with the women when one of them put her hand on
my penis and began to stroke it like Doriskos used to. As it got harder,
the girl looked at me with wide eyes and stared at it, surprised. All the
other girls were told about it and to my embarrassment, they all came and
touched it, giggling and covering their mouths. It didn't take long for me
to get the feeling again and I shivered violently as it overtook me.

Once the fit had passed, I opened my eyes to see Rufus staring at me,
stroking his chin and looking puzzled.

Later that night he came to my chamber and sat on my cot.

"Show me your membrum virilis, your penis," he said.

Reluctantly, I did as I was told. Not because I was embarrassed of course,
I'd long since got over that, I was afraid of what he wanted to do. Gently
he began to play with it, but this was different to the way Doriskos did
it. Somehow he made me feel better and happier than when Doriskos did it,
touching it in ways which excited me and made me feel good.. With hardly a
pause, Rufus lifted his toga and let me see his penis, standing up hard and
stiff. It was tiny though, not even as big as mine! Taking my hand, he
place it on his little member and got me to stroke it for him.

I'd never touched anyone there before, but I knew what it was like and how
good it could feel of course. At first it felt strange holding someone
else's penis, but I soon got used to it and decided it was alright,
especially if it made him feel as good as it did me.. We rubbed each other
for ages, smiling gently at each other until we both got the feeling, Rufus
shaking so much his wobbling fat belly made me giggle.

Rufus must've said something to the master the following day because I was
moved from the women's quarters and put in a chamber near Rufus. I never
saw the mistress again either.  Instead I became the master's page boy,
taking messages for him and going to the market. He even bought me a new
white toga with a red border, called a toga praetexta, which all boys wore
until they became grown men, which I would never do.

I had a visit every night from Rufus too, when we played with each other's
member for ages.  It was a little secret we shared between us, and one
which I was happy with.. For the first time in my Roman life, I had someone
who actually wanted me.

It wasn't long before we shared cots all night, sleeping together after
we'd pleasured ourselves. The only thing was that Rufus smelled bad. He
didn't bathe before he retired and he reeked of sweat and stale food. I
managed to avoid the worst of it by turning away, but one night I made a
bad mistake. After he'd made me all hard and stiff, he surprised me by
getting me to put my penis in his mouth. At first I thought he was going to
bite me, but instead he started to suck on me. Using his lips and tongue,
it wasn't long before he made me squirm with my orgasm like never before -
it felt wonderful.

The problem came when he made me do the same to him. As I put my head into
his crotch, I felt sick with the awful stench. Even after holding my
breath, I couldn't do it. This made him angry and he slapped me on the
face. Through my tears, I told him that he smelled so bad, I couldn't do
it, even though I wanted to. He slapped me again and kicked me out of bed,
cursing.

Early the following morning, Rufus came into my chamber and stared at the
bruises on my face, looking worried.

"I'm sorry," he said. "To mark a beauty like you is sure to anger the
gods. Will you forgive me?"

I nodded yes, feeling sorry for him in an odd sort of way. He managed a
little smile and slipped me a small gold pin for my toga.

"I'll tell the master you have an attach of stomach cramps," he said. "By
tomorrow the marks will have gone."

That night he took me to his bed again, but this time I was pleased to see
that he'd taken a bath and we enjoyed having each other's penis in our
mouths.

I don't know whether the master knew what Rufus and I did, although I think
he'd guessed because of the little presents Rufus gave me once in a while,
like gold rings and charm bracelets. He never said anything though.

It was in my second season in the house when I must have been 13 or 14
seasons old when things changed again. Business had been bad for ages
because the army and all the rich generals had gone to fight somewhere, and
nobody in Rome had any money to spend. One day, the master called me into
his business room and looked at me sadly. On the table were a brand new
toga and sash, of far better quality than I'd ever seen before.

"Put that on," he said without looking at me. I did, and after sneaking a
quick look at myself in the polished metal mirror, was pleased with how I
looked.

"Take this note to Tacitus, the diamond merchant," the master said. "And be
civil to him."

"Sir," I said, disturbed that he thought I might be uncivil to anyone, "I
have never been anything else as far as I know."

"No, no, you haven't," he said hastily, "But just make sure you are
particularly well behaved to Tacitus."

As I made my way to Tacitus' house, I opened the note to read it, but the
only words I could recognise were my name, Angelus, and a sum of money. The
other words I didn't know.

Tacitus was a big, bearded man who always smelled of cedarwood oil or
cinnamon.  Whenever he looked at me, there was always a strange gleam in
his eye, one which I'd seen before and distrusted.

Once he'd read the note he closed and barred the main door and showed me
into his back room as if I was expecting it.

What happened next I can hardly bear to recall, so great was the pain and
humiliation. First he stripped me until I was naked and lay me on his day
cot, face down. Then I heard him step up behind me. He didn't say anything
at all: he didn't even touch me except to force my arse cheeks apart and
hold me down as he did something indescribable to me.

After he'd finished, he gave me a silver coin and sent me home, without a
word. All the painful way back I couldn't get the picture of his bushy
black beard and smell of cedarwood out of my mind. The silver coin I gave
to a beggar as I felt a cold liquid ruin down my legs: whether it was blood
or seed, or both, I didn't know or care. I just managed to get home before
I vomited my heart out.

I was laying on my cot, wishing I was dead when Rufus crept in and held me
in his big arms.  Delicately he removed my blood-stained toga and cleaned
me up with rose-scented water, then he rubbed some white ointment on my
inflamed and torn fundament which made the pain almost go away.

>From that day onwards, I was sent to Tacitus twice a week. My master never
looked me in the eye again: I would have run away, but Rufus reminded me
that runaway slaves always had their ears cut off or noses split when they
were recaptured. Or worse.

Word got out that I was available, and it wasn't long before I was sent out
almost every afternoon. Some men were kind and tried not to hurt me too
much, or even encouraged me to try and enjoy myself. Others were harsh and
cruel. The master never took any notice of how ill used I'd been unless I
was marked in any way, and then all he would do was not send me there
again. One time when a dirty and smelly old man tried to make me do
something indescribable again, I hit him and ran home. When the master
heard about it, he beat me: not with the leaded whip he used on the others,
but with a leather belt which left no marks. The he sent me back to
apologise and do as I was told.

With the little money given to me by the kinder men, I used to buy a
measure or two of opium: this would ease the pain I had to endure from the
worst ones. The kinder and more tender men who hired me, I tried to please
as much as I could in gratitude - I had nothing else to offer.

On my travels about Rome, I learned that in a way I was lucky. The beggars
lived a pitiful life, surviving as best they could on scraps, and being
beaten, or worse, by anyone who felt like it. Boys like me who knew only
one way to earn a living thronged the arches under the Colosseum or in the
market place. It wasn't unusual to see three or four boys bent over with
their togas round their waists or kneeling in front of a man with their
faces in his crotch It didn't make me feel any better when I saw they were
all complete with pricks and balls. At least they has something to offer
which I never would have.

The masters business went from bad to worse. Even with the not
inconsiderable money I must have earned for him, the servants disappeared
one by one until at last there was only me, Rufus and the old kitchen maid
left. Rufus stayed because he was prepared to work for no wages other than
his bed and food, just like the kitchen skivvy. I was only kept on until I
could be sold for a good price.

Discretely I put the word out to the men I liked and were good to me, that
my services may not be available for very much longer. Most shrugged their
shoulders and wished me luck, after all, boys like me were to be had easily
and probably a lot cheaper too. I was dispensable and disposable.

My salvation came in the form of Julius. He was about 20 or 25 seasons old,
well built and quite good looking. He was also married, like many of the
men I visited, but his wife lived on their estate outside Rome and not in
the city. The fact that they didn't live together wasn't unusual; many
couples chose to live apart in those days, especially when the man's
interests lay in other directions, like Julius.

I was sold for 35 denarii, the same as the master paid for me. I thought
that I should have brought more as I could now read, write and knew how to
behave in society. I also had other talents which were worth money to some
men, but that wasn't mentioned.

Julius kept a small house in the city, only keeping an old crone to do the
cleaning and cooking, a boy who helped around the house and an ostler for
the horses.

My sleeping quarters were in an ante-chamber off Julius' bedchamber with a
small cot and a chest for my clothes. From there I could fulfill my new
duties which were to take care of my master in every way I could, from
helping him with his bath to running errands for him.

He was a kind man who took good care of me, even buying me a set of fine
clothes to wear.  It seemed that all the rich young men of Rome has their
page boy or 'puer' to accompany them when they were out, in fact they took
pride in making them look as handsome and attractive as possible. I was
fortunate enough to be one of the better-looking ones and won much
admiration. I suspect there was also a certain amount of jealousy too,
judging by the ribald comments I heard. Not surprisingly most of us pueri
shared our masters beds too, and it wasn't unknown for a particularly
gifted one to be loaned out to a special friend for a time in exchange for
a favour, but I'm glad to say that Julius always turned down such requests
for me.

My handsomeness caused me a few problems in the forum from time to
time. Most men I could cope with: a simple leer or obscene comment
whispered in my ear could be ignored easily. Even the occasional hand on
the toga could be dealt with by a twist of the body or a quick kick to the
shins. There was one time though that a ruffian managed to slip a hand
under my toga and take a firm and painful grip of my penis. I was so
shocked by this lewd behaviour that I made the mistake of not moving for a
second, and the man took this for a sign of assent and started to fondle
me. When I realised what was happening, I struck him hard in the groin with
my knee and ran home crying with shame.

When I related this story to Julius, he gave me an embrace and wiped away
my tears, then inspected my penis to make sure it hadn't been
damaged. Later that day he gave me a small ornately carved knife which I
could secrete about my person when I went out..

Once in a while Julius had to visit his estate for business and to see his
wife. He never took me there, he told me, because his wife, although quite
prepared to accept that her husband kept a boy, wouldn't like it displayed
so openly to their friends. I didn't mind this as he was always more
attentive and caring when he came back.

As time went by, I settled down to a comfortable contented life with few
problems except for the kitchen boy, Philipus. He was a season or two
younger than me, darker skinned and curly haired. He was also mischievous,
in fact the ostler referred to him as 'diabolus' or the imp.

I could withstand his torments easily to begin with, and ignored
them. Unfortunately he mistook this for a weakness on my part, assuming
that being a eunuch also made me soft.  Gradually his torments got worse,
barely whispered obscenities escaping his lips every time we passed each
other, oil and fat spilt accidentally on my toga if I got in his way. I
would have brawled with him normally but my position in the household
didn't permit it, and neither could I tell Julius without it seeming petty
and childish.

Things came to a head one day when I was in the kitchen. As I had my head
turned, Philipus poured oil on the marble floor, causing me to fall badly,
twisting my leg painfully. Julius, seeing me limp asked what had happened
and so I said that I had fallen in the kitchen, not mentioning
Philipus. Someone though, probably the ostler, must've told Julius what has
really happened, and how much teasing and bullying I's taken in the past
without complaint.

The following morning I was taken to the stables where I was made to watch
as the ostler gave Philipus a sound beating with the horse whip. I believe
that he thought he was doing me a favour by thrashing him so badly, but by
the time he'd finished, I could barely hold back my own tears at the
savagery. Hurriedly I went back to my room and sobbed on Philipus' behalf.

The boy didn't appear for the rest of the day and I began to worry about
him. I'd had beatings in the past and knew how much they hurt, not only
physically but also in the mind. After our evening meal, I picked up a jar
of healing salve and asked Julius if I might go and tend to
Philipus. Giving me a smile, he allowed me to go.

Little Diabolus was still curled up on the straw where he'd been left,
sleeping fitfully. I put the oil lamp by his side and stared at the
bloodied red weals criss-crossing his back, buttocks and legs. Gently I
smoothed the ointment on his back, rubbing it in as delicately as I could.
Philipus moaned in his sleep, stretching out to allow me to reach all the
cuts.

I'd almost finished when he woke up and turned over to see who was taking
care of him. As soon as he saw who it was, he stared at me startled and not
a little scared..

Quietly, I told him not to worry as I was trying to make him feel
better. To confirm this, I kissed him, Roman style on the cheek and
embraced him, taking care not to touch his back.

Gradually he relaxed and he put his head in my lap as we talked in
whispers.. He told me that the old cook was his grandmother and that he was
an 'orbus'. After a few giggles and false guesses, I worked out that he
meant orphan in my language. He also said that he was sorry for the way
he'd treated me, but he had been jealous of my position in the household,
and frightened of me because of my size. That anyone could be envious of me
for being what I was had never occurred to me before and so I told him a
little of my history.

When I told him how I'd been castrated, his eyes flew wide open and his
hands went to cover his penis and eggs.

"Can I have a look?" he whispered. "I've never ..." he left the sentence
unfinished.

Smiling at him to give confidence, I raised my toga. I had no problems with
that as I'd been stared at many, many times before, and in any case I
wanted the boy for a friend, not an enemy.

He examined me closely, without touching except to run a delicate finger
along the scar.  Rolling onto his side, he compared himself with me.

Strangely enough, it was only then that I realised I'd never seen a full
set of genitals close up before, certainly not since I'd been gelded.

Having sought, and received, his approval I examined his just as closely as
he'd done me. I felt the eggs move in his sac under my fingers and felt
around where it joined his body. As I moved his penis out of the way to get
a better look, I felt it begin to harden. Instantly, I withdrew my hand,
embarrassed at the reaction I'd caused.

Looking at me with his deep black eyes, he put my hand back, the yearning
in his face.  Delicately I began to rub him as he wanted. With my other
hand, I encourage him to do the same to me.

This was something we both wanted to do; he because he was lonely and me
because I desired it. And it made us friends too.

As we fumbled together, I actually began to enjoy myself and concentrated
my mind not only on Philipus' small fingers working on my penis, but also
on his hard member in my hand. At the back of my mind, I was pleased that
he'd forgotten about his whipping for a few minutes, and in the knowledge
that we were pleasuring each other because we both wanted it.

When he orgasmed, I watched as his balls contracted into his groin and the
seed race through his tubes into my hand. Wee both trembled together, his
slight body shaking all over with ecstasy and mine with pure bliss. This
time we kissed lightly on the lips as I took my leave of him, promising to
return in the morning.

Julius was sat on his couch reading a scroll when I came back. He looked at
me with a sparkle in his eyes and drew me to him, sitting me on his lap as
he often did when we were alone.

"How is he? Feeling better now?" he asked.

"Yes. I gave him some salve and had a talk with him."

"And something else too, unless I am mistaken," Julius laughed.

I was shamed into silence and stared at the floor, fully expecting the
promise of a beating for my indiscretion.

"I'm sorry," I stammered, beginning to work out how to avoid the whip. "How
did you know?"

"You always have a lovely red glow about you afterwards," he grinned, "And
of course ......"  he took my hand and sniffed it loudly. "This can't be
yours can it?"

I felt ashamed at the way I'd abused his trust and blushed crimson.

"Don't fret," Julius said. "He needed a friend just now, and you were there
for him. You did right."

Relaxing with relief at hearing this, I made myself comfortable on his lap,
I put my arms round his neck and bowed my head in supplication.

Tenderly he stroked my face, leaning in to give me a light kiss on the
lips.. Then he kissed me deeply, his tongue entwining with mine. Under my
thighs, I felt his member harden, as did mine when he slipped his hand
under my toga.

"I don't suppose you have anything left for me?" he whispered in my ear.

In reply, I unfastened the sash of my togas and let it fall.

He stared at my nakedness for a while, his penis fully hardened and
pressing into my leg.

"Angelus, my Angelus," he sighed as he hugged me to him.

I hung on to his neck and wrapped my legs round his waist as he carried me
into his chamber.  Moments later we were embracing tightly, our bodies
melded urgently together as we kissed.

The only thing I have to offer anyone is my body, and over the years I had
learned how to use it to give pleasure and delight to the most weary of
men. I had a hundred little tricks and ploys to arouse even the most
reluctant of penises and stimulate the mind, but tonight I had absolutely
no need of them.

Julius was as excited as I had ever known him and as we cuddled, I could
feel his juices already seeping on to my body. I knew there was only one
way to satisfy him when he was in this mood and I looked into his eyes. He
had never forced himself on me in that way, for which I respected him
greatly. Whenever he, or I, felt it was the right thing to do, we would
gaze at each other in a way which could only one thing. Under Julius'
tender care, I'd learned how to take a man inside myself and had begun to
actually enjoy it - it gave us both great pleasure.

Moving onto my back, I lifted my legs for him. The need for any oil or
ointment had long since passed, and we both sighed deeply as he penetrated
me. A warm, delicious glow suffused me as I felt his member take me. This
was the whole reason for my living, the only thing I could offer, and the
only thing that made me feel truly wanted.

I clasped my legs behind his back and pulled him to me as hard as I could,
aware that tears of joy were already running down my cheeks. I don't know
how it feels for a woman when she is coupled with a man, but if it is only
one tenth of what I feel, then she is truly lucky.

Underneath Julius I wriggled and writhed in ecstasy as he moved in and out,
my eyes closed and breathing stopped. Each time he thrust down, he reached
that spot which sent bolts of lightning through me, and I bit my lips as I
groaned loud enough to wake the dead.

Being a eunuch, I didn't have the luxury of the feeling you get when your
balls have been emptied. I still had the orgasms though, and after only a
few minutes rest between them could have several before I became too
exhausted to carry on. Julius had learned how to control himself too, and
could often delay the spilling of his seed for ages. Tonight was one of
those nights, and so it was the early hours of the morning before he
finally let himself go and shoot inside of me.

As I nestled down to sleep, curled up in Julius' arms, the thought that
Philipus had somehow contributed to our passions crossed my mind.

The following morning after Julius and I had bathed, I sought the boy
out. He was still curled up on the straw, the pain of his whipping now
eased, to be replaced with an ache that ran through his whole body. The
salve I'd rubbed into him the evening before had done its work and the ugly
marks were already healing. Using some warm water I tried to clean it off,
but it had set hard on the skin, held in place by the fine downy hair of
his skin. Wrapping a drying cloth round to cover his modesty, I supported
him as we went to the bathroom.

As he lay back in the warm water, I carefully scraped off the caked
ointment and gently used a fine pumice stone to cleanse him. Like most of
his class, he rarely bathed, a swill with cold water usually sufficing, and
as the pumice did its work, the water became so dirty that it had to be
changed. Once his body was as clean as I could make it, I sat on the edge
of the bath and used a sharp knife and comb to tease out the tangles and
knots in his curly black hair.

Tending to the boy I found very satisfying and as I worked we talked about
all manner of unimportant things. Like me, he had no one to talk to of his
own age and we found it pleasant to converse. I also had the personal
delight of feasting my eyes on his smooth olive-skinned body, my gaze
eventually settling on the treasure between his legs. Beneath my coarse
work- toga, my penis began to arise, which made Philipus smile and his own
member harden in companionship.

We were so busy with ourselves that neither of us heard Julius enter the
room. Immediately Philipus saw him, he blushed and covered his erection
with his hands - not before Julius saw it though. For my part, I blushed
hotly, not because of what I was doing, but for the libidinous thoughts in
my head.

My master smiled, perfectly aware of why I was feeling a little ashamed of
myself. Sitting alongside me, he stroked my hair and rested his arm on my
shoulder to let us know that he thought nothing of it. He stayed to talk
with us for a while, his eyes straying to Philipus often, admiring his body
as I had done.

"I am going to the forum," Julius said to me. "I was going to ask you to
accompany me, but perhaps you should stay here and look after your friend."

I stood up and bowed my head to him. "As you wish," I replied.

As I lowered my eyes, I noticed a definite rising in his toga. I looked at
his face and again at his groin: he stood up, smiled and whispered in my
ear, "Perhaps I'll wait for a few minutes!"  After he embraced me, he left
us alone once more.

By now the water had cooled considerably and I helped Philipus out of the
bath and handed him the drying cloth. With a very slight smile, he offered
me the cloth back and lowered his eyes. Willingly I took up the offer and
dried him tenderly from head to toe.. Because of the cool air, his ova had
shrunk back into his groin and his penis shrivelled up. Using my hands I
held them softly, warming them up until they were once more their proper
size and beauty.

Because of the difference in our positions in the house, it was not
possible for him to approach me in the way he wanted without breaching an
unwritten law, for which he could receive another beating. What I saw down
below though told me all I needed to know.

"Come," I said. "Let me find you some better clothes."

Taking him by the hand I led him into my chamber and drew the screen across
the door so we wouldn't be disturbed. Sitting him on my cot, I took his
hands in mine and looked at him, longingly. In return he gaze at me as a
supplicant in a temple.

What had happened between us yesterday could have been put down to
temptation or lust and was never to be repeated, much less spoken
about. Now though I had a choice.. If I took him to my cot, it would join
us together something like the way such as Julius and I were, although not
as strongly of course, but we could offer each other a little comfort and
company. Alternatively I could give him the toga and take things no
further, hoping we would still remain friends.

I did the natural thing and removed my dress, allowing him to behold my
total nakedness. He let his eyes wander down my body, taking in every mark
and blemish as well as the thing he was most interested in. Nervously he
lifted a hand as if to touch me, but let it drop. To encourage him I lay on
the cot and stretched out in front of him. Taking his hands I placed them
on my chest, pulling him down beside me.

Together we explored each other, tenderly and softly, getting to know our
bodies as intimately as we could. For my part it was the first time that
I'd had the privilege of being given this amount of freedom with someone
anywhere near my own age and I found it to be exhilarating. As for
Philipus, not only was it his first time but it was also the first time
since he'd lost his parents that anyone had taken a real interest in him as
a person and not just a worthless slave.

There were many things I would have liked to do with him: to teach him the
ways of love, to show him how much pleasure we could give each other, but
he wasn't ready yet. That would come in time and with desire. For the
present I satisfied him by giving him a kiss, not only on the lips but also
on all the hidden and secret places that we are blessed with.

Everyone has their special places, which when teased properly, takes them
to an ever- increasing height of pleasure. I shan't tell you where they all
are: either you already know them, or it would spoil your fun in the future
trying to find them! What I will tell you is that one of mine is on the
inside of my thighs, and Philipus' has one around his nipples.  Whenever I
touched them, or even better, licked and teased them with my tongue, he
went wild with passion, his arms and legs flailing around uncontrollably.

This amused me immensely and I teased him without mercy until he begged me
to stop, beads of perspiration covering his forehead and penis
throbbing. Aware that Julius may return at any moment, I set to work on him
properly. Ignoring his pleas, my tongue and teeth suckled and tormented him
until his body froze for an instant and then bucked violently as he shot
out his seed like an arrow from a bow, all the while his membrum remaining
untouched!

I dressed myself as Philipus regained his senses, only pausing to clean up
the residue of our fun.

The toga I gave him fitted well, the hem, falling just below his knees as
it aught. To complete his dress, and to confirm his new status, I also
presented him with a small silver ring which some grateful man had given me
once. There was only one more thing I wanted to do for him, and I explained
what that was as we sat chastely on my cot.

It is usual in the Roman way of things to share secret names between
special friends, names known only to them. Doriskos had hinted at this when
he called me 'Angelus' instead of Peregrinus. Julius and I had out private
names of course, but it wouldn't be correct or polite of me to tell you
what they are.

For Philipus I chose 'Catulus', which means 'young animal' - a name which
fitted him perfectly and pleased him well. For me he chose 'Amicus', or
friend, a name I was proud to accept.

As I tidied Julius' wardrobe a little later on, it occurred to me that
although I had given Catulus a token of out friendship, I hd never even
thought of getting one for the most important person in my life.

Looking through my jewel box, I selected a few trinkets which had been
given to me inn the past by men, most of whom I couldn't even remember the
names of. Wrapping them carefully, I tied them round my waist under my toga
and went out.

Not too far away was the workshop of a jeweller I used to be sent to
occasionally in the old days, a man who treated me well and never did me
any harm. It took a few moments for him to recognise me, but once he did
was anxious to hear what news I had. Without giving away any confidences, I
told him how things had changed for me and how much better cared for I
was. Then I explained that I wanted to exchange some of the gold and silver
things I'd brought to him for as good a gold ring as I could afford. He
sorted the trinkets into two piles: the smaller one he returned to me,
saying that they were all base metal and worth almost nothing. Among them
was an ornate ring which I had been told was of the best quality, given to
me by a man who taken me viciously and hurt me badly in his haste. I pulled
a face as I thought of the pain and indignity he'd caused, and all for a
worthless bauble.

In exchange for all the other stuff I purchased a nice green onyx ring set
in gold. On the stone was carved the head of a beautiful young boy, which
was just what I wanted. I was even better pleased when I was told that it
represented the Roman god Cupid, or the Greek likeness called Eros. Tying
it with a leather thong round my neck, for safe keeping, I set off for
home, well pleased with my purchase.

As I walked along the banks of the Tiber, I hurled the offending worthless
gift into the water.  At least it couldn't cause any more hurt
there. Passing by the Colosseum on my way home, I ventured into the area
where boys could be found, my hand firmly on my knife.

Luckily there were only a few men about, and they were too busy taking
their pleasures to worry about me. One man though caught my eye. He was
holding a young boy who was less than half my age, with the obvious
intention of sodomising him. The boy's eyes were opened wide in terror as
he stared at the man's penis. It was huge, one of the biggest I'd ever
seen. If he used that on the lad, it would surely kill him. Without a
second thought I drew my knife and approached him, all the pain and anger
I'd suffered in exactly the same way that the boy was about to suffer
suddenly boiling to the surface. Standing by the man's side, I showed him
my knife and pressed the point firmly into his groin. Using the foulest
language I knew, I told him to leave. He paused for a second and looked at
me. That second was one too many and I pricked him hard enough to draw
blood to show I meant business. That was enough - the proximity of the
sharp blade uncomfortably close to his manhood was sufficient to make him
change his mind. He turned and hurried away as quickly as possible without
even a backward glance. So quietly had this happened that there were no
witnesses, even the little boy had taken his chance and ran when he could.

Trade must've been bad that day as many of the boys stood about in groups
talking or sharing a measure of opium. Not only that, but several boys, in
desperation, had tied their togas round their waists and were unashamedly
showing off their wares to the passers-by.. Feeling discomfitted at this, I
approached the nearest of them and pressed my purse of unwanted trinkets in
his hand and walked away as fast as I could.

When Julius came home, he was in a good mood. I think he'd had a goblet or
two of wine with his friends: he wasn't drunk though, neither of us liked
wine that much.

I sat on his knee and embraced him as was our custom and exchanged news of
the day. He seemed very interested in how Philipus was and so I told him
how he was healing well, but it might be a day more before he was able to
work. This saddened him a little and he said that he hadn't intended for
him to get such a severe whipping, but once it had started was unable to
stop it. Things were better after I told Julius that Philipus and I had
become good friends.

"I saw that," he smiled, "That's why I left you alone. Did everything go
alright between you?"

We both knew what he meant and I nodded at him, blushing. He could have
been angered by the acknowledgement of what we'd done, after all I was his
boy, bought and paid for. In the eyes of Roman law, I had no rights at all.

"Good," he replied. "I am pleased for you, just as long as you don't become
too distracted by him. We all need friends of our own station in life."

I accepted his comments with thanks, and heeded his warning not to get too
amoured of him.  Feeling obliged to Julius for being so understanding, I
went on to tell him of the names we'd chosen for each other, although not
what they were of course. He would have to be told if he asked, I realised,
but he chose not to. It was when I told him about the little ring I'd
gifted to Philipus that I remembered about the gold and onyx one I'd bought
for him. I had been planning to give it to him when we were in our cot
together, but now seemed a better time.

Untying it from around my neck, I put it in his hand and watched carefully
as he gazed at it.  A cloud passed over his face as he turned to me.

"It's very beautiful," he whispered. "But where did you get all the money
to pay for such a thing?"

I told him about my treasure box and how I'd exchanged some of the
things. He smiled grimly when I told him that a few of them turned out to
be quite valueless - he understood what I'd been through to earn them.

"Where are they now?" he asked.

"I gave them away to some beggar boys in the street," I answered. "They
reminded me too much of things in my life I would rather forget."

Deliberately, I didn't tell him about the fake gold ring, or the incident
with the ruffian at the Colosseum. Instead I picked up the ring I'd given
to him and made to put it on his finger.

It is a Roman custom for married men and women to wear a wedding band on
the middle finger of their left hand as that is the one where the blood
runs straight to the heart. Rings from family and friends are worn on the
middle finger of the right hand, and this is the one I intended to put my
ring on. Julius presented his little finger to me.

I was devasted. This was the only gift I'd ever bought him and had cost a
large part of my savings. To be insulted in this way hurt me very badly, so
much so that I was almost in tears.

Julius gave me a hug and kissed me on the cheeks and reminded me that much
as he loved me, the ring had to fit on the little finger. "In any case, it
is too small to fit on the middle one," he added, kissing me properly.

For the remainder of the evening we conversed about many things, Julius
taking good care to make me feel happier about my mistake. We also spoke of
Philipus of course. Agreeing that once he'd been cleaned up, he was a
handsome and presentable boy who deserved a better station in life than the
one he had.

By the time were ready to retire, both Julius and I had regained our good
spirits and were looking forward to our cot. As I undressed him and put his
clothes away, I sensed that Julius was feeling particularly amorous that
night, which pleased me greatly.

Once in the privacy of our cot though, he seemed to become distracted in
some way. We kissed and cuddled one another as always, but when I tried to
divine what he wanted me to do beyond that, I failed each time. It appears
he didn't want me to use my hands or mouth to please him, nor even my
fundament. Being at a loss as to what to do next, I kissed him deeply and
looked into his eyes.

"Can I tell you something of my past?" Julius asked. "I think you may need
to know."

It was understood of course that any conversations held in the privacy of
our chamber were for our ears alone. Many people say things in the heat of
passion that are best not repeated, or even remembered. For example, I have
lost count of the number of times that I've heard someone tell me that they
love me and can't live without me. But come the reality of the world, it is
conveniently forgotten about.

"I would like to hear it," I replied quietly. "If you wish to tell me."

Julius began his story hesitantly, as if trying to remember things from a
distant past.

"I was younger than you when I began to realise that I enjoyed the
companionship of boys more than that of girls. That was not a problem of
course. It is expected of Roman boys that they indulge in the delights of
Eros in their youth, and even older."

Here, I need to explain the peculiar attitude the Romans had to the love
between men.  Among boys of a similar age, there is no restriction on what
they do between themselves at all. The problem comes when they change from
puberty to adolescence and then to adults.  This is usually taken as being
when hairs begin to appear, seed can be produced and an interest in females
surfaces, when the toga praetexta is exchanged for the toga virilis. From
that time onwards, the younger may not approach the older male for favours
unless the elder agrees to the liaison, and even then it is not thought
strictly proper. It is definitely not allowed for men above the age of
adolescence to court with each other. It happens, of course, but being
discovered means complete social disgrace and perhaps worse.

"When I was about 15 summers old," Julius went on, "My father bought a
slave called Marcus. He was about five years older than me and very
beautiful to my eyes.. The idea of anything happening between us was
impossible of course, but I couldn't get him out of my mind and I began to
follow him everywhere he went. It didn't take him long to know what I
wanted from him, and he went to great lengths to avoid me. I could tell
that he desired me, the way that any man can, but if he satisfied his
desire and was discovered, his fate was hanging. After castration of
course.

Much to my shame I was relentless and eventually forced myself on him,
after all I was the son of the master and he was a slave. At first we
contented ourselves using only our hands and mouths, but it is in the way
of things that we went beyond this, and used each other as if we were
women. Somehow my father found out and gave me the worst beating of my life
and put the slave in irons. I felt guilty for Marcus and my father too. Not
only was my family's good name in disgrace, but Marcus could be
executed. And all because of me."

Julius took a deep breath as he remembered what must have been a very
painful memory.

"I begged and pleaded with my father to find a way out of our difficulty,
if only for Marcus' sake. Eventually we reached an agreement which
satisfied us both. Marcus was to be sold, with his good name intact and I
was to marry as soon as possible and produce a child.

This was done quickly; a bride was found for me and I even managed to
produce a baby girl, much as I was disgusted by the act of copulation. Once
the baby was known to be healthy, we all agreed that it would be best for
everyone if I left the family home and lived here in Rome."

That explained a great deal to me, and I began to understand more about the
man who owned me - and the man who I loved dearly. In some ways his life
was harder than mine. At least everyone knew what I was, and I had no
choice in the matter. Julius was in a far more difficult position than I
was. He could never be as open as me, nor be accepted in society in the
same way if his true preferences became general knowledge.

Doing the only thing possible, I clung to him tightly and tried to let him
know how much I cared. Using the words I so much wanted to was out of the
question, after all he was still the master and I the servant.

"Thank you," I whispered in his ear as truly as I could.

To lighten the atmosphere, I tried everything I knew to cheer him up and
within a few minutes had him smiling, and much to my delight, as hard as
ever. It helped me a lot knowing now that he was a true boy lover and not
just one of those men who used boys to satisfy their needs when their wives
weren't available. Lifting my legs up, I offered my body to him, happily
and willingly.

He was about to enter me when he paused and looked deep into my eyes. It
took me a moment, an unbelieving moment, to realise that he was pleading
with me some something, but for what I couldn't fathom..

The answer came when he lowered my legs and took my place on the cot, legs
raised.

This was unheard of. I was the eunuch, the catamite, whose role in life was
to be submissive and take what I was given whether I wanted to or not. Now
my master was offering himself to me in a way which was beyond belief. I
could partly understand why: He'd been taken this way many years before by
Marcus and maybe others, and must've enjoyed it, welcomed it even. In
relating his story to me, he'd reminded himself of it and perhaps wished to
recapture some of his youth.

He continued pleading with his eyes alone. I knew that he was unable to put
it into words, that would be impossibly demeaning.

"I've never done this before," I whispered. "I'm not sure I even can."

"Try," Julius said very quietly.

My member refused to stay hard enough for the first few tries. I was far
too much in awe for it to remain so. But then, realising that this was for
my masters pleasure and not mine alone I managed to stiffen it
sufficiently.

I entered him more easily than I thought I would; he'd probably remembered
what to do from his past experiences; he was also aroused and very desirous
to be taken which also helped.

As I moved in and out of him, I forgot to my shame that he was the master
and concentrated on giving as much satisfaction as I could, delighting
myself at the same time with my new- found ability. I also realised the
attraction that particular part of me held for some men as I absorbed the
heat from Julius' body and felt his muscles holding me in.

With each drive forwards, I watched Julius' smile broaden, his eyes now
full of joy and not sadness. As I rubbed against the spot deep inside, he
gasped in ecstasy, his penis pulsating hypnotically between us. The he
erupted magnificently, his seed shooting out in one long rope, accompanied
by a deep moan of exhilaration. Once I knew he was satisfied, I allowed
myself to reach my own dry orgasm in a few short strokes and withdrew,
feeling more pleased with myself than I had in a long time.

Embracing each other, we relaxed in contentment. Julius leaned over and
kissed me deeply and passionately, his eyes saying all that was necessary
for me.

Unexpectedly, Julius removed my ring from his little finger and put it in
my hand. Somewhat confused, I stared at it until I saw he was pointing his
middle finger at me. With my eyes brimming with moisture, I slipped it on.

The following morning I was contemplating the incredible events of the
night before as I prepared his bath. Having taken him the way I did was one
thing, but accepting what he'd done with the ring afterwards was something
else. Sadly, I realised that it had been done in the heat of passion and
would be regretted in the full light of day.

As I dressed him afterwards, I replaced his wedding band and picked up my
gift to him.  Lifting his right hand, I tried to put it on the little
finger, but he wouldn't let me. Instead, he insisted it went on the middle
one.

"We must talk," he said seriously.

After we'd broken our fast, he explained to me that it was his intention to
adopt me and make me part of his family. To my surprise, this was very
easily done and was common practice in Rome, especially when it was
desirous of uniting two families without the formality of any marriages, or
the promotion of a well-liked slave into the citizenry of Rome. I doubt
that there were very many like ours.

Firstly though, I had to be given my freedom: all that this required was a
document signed by myself and Julius in the presence of a magister. The
second problem was my doubtful gender.  Roman women were very much second
class citizens and had so very few rights that there was little or no
advantage of a female taking on Roman citizenship. Julius assured me that
this would be no problem at all: one had only to take a look at me to see
that I was all boy, he joked. That, at least I knew was true! If everything
went well, I would be created a Roman Citizen, second class, which was a
group reserved for foreigners and eunuchs who chose Rome as their home,
with all rights except that of voting.

On the third day, Julius presented me with a little parcel. Inside it was a
new toga, edged not only in red but also with a thin green line, his family
colour. This told the world that I was a member of his family and not a
servant or slave. Also in the parcel were copies of the documents which
confirmed my new status.

Gleefully, I pushed Julius onto a couch, jumped on his knee and kissed him
all over his face, tears flowing freely down my cheeks. After I'd calmed
down, we kissed properly and lovingly.

"What do I call you?" I asked as we embraced.

Julius thought for a moment and said, "Father won't do. I'm too young and
you're too old.  Brother won't do as everyone knows I don't have one. It'll
have to be cousin. I have any number of those."

"Cousin Julius. Cousin Julius." I rolled the name round my tongue and
decided I liked it.

"Cousin Angelus," Julius grinned. "I suppose I could get used to it
eventually!"

"Oh," he said suddenly, "I almost forgot."

He put his hand inside his toga and extracted a small rosewood box.

"Open it," he said as I stared at it.

Inside was a beautifully carved onyx and gold ring, an exact copy of the
one I'd given him. It was perfect.

"Middle finger, right hand," he smiled.

I presented it to him and he slipped it on for me.

After admiring it, I kissed him on the cheeks, as Romans do, and whispered,
"Julius." It was the first time I'd use his name.

We were in danger of becoming too sentimental after the emotions of the
past few minutes and so Julius changed the subject.

"We need a houseboy," Julius said. "The last one seems to have
disappeared."

Giggling with happiness, I agreed with him.

"Have you any ideas?" he added.

There was only one answer of course, but I played along anyway.

"Well, there is this one boy I know who might be suitable. If you agree of
course. He is accustomed to our house and knows where everything is. He
also may have one or two other talents which may be of use to us," I added
cheekily.

"And do I know him? What's his name?"

"He's called Philipus. You may know him, he's the kitchen boy."

"Excellent. Go bring him and let us talk," Julius said, "But first dress in
your new toga.."

It was the work of moments to change and then I hurried off to find
Philipus. He was sat, as usual, in the kitchen, helping to prepare the next
meal. His mouth fell open as he stared at my new outfit, complete with
green band.

"Come on," I stammered out, "We want to talk to you."

His look of surprise turned to one of terror, his face contorting to show
his fear.

"Sorry!" I said, "You're not in any trouble. We just need to talk to you."

Taking him by the hand, I led the trembling boy into the day
chamber. Placing him in front of Julius I went to stand in my usual place
behind him. Discretely, Julius took my hand and sat me down beside him,
giving me a wink as he did so.

Understandably, Philipus was completely baffled by this sudden change in
affairs and stared at us unblinking.

In a few words, Julius explained that I was now a part of his family and
was to be treated as such henceforward, and also we were looking for a new
houseboy.

At last, Philipus began to understand, his trembling stopped and he
listened carefully as Julius explained what duties were expected of him.

"Do you think you can manage all that?" Julius asked when he'd finished.

Philipus nodded quickly.

"Good," Julius smiled and turned to me. "Have you got anything to say?"

Adopting the most serious face I could, I looked directly at Philipus and
said, "You and I have secret names for each other, haven't we?"

He nodded, blushing fiercely at the same time.

"Why?"

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Julius staring intently at the floor,
only just managing not to laugh. I was asking the questions which he
couldn't, but I could. Philipus was trying to work out how to reply.

"Because we do ....." Because we do secret things together," he stumbled
out, his blush deepening if that were possible.

"Good," I said grinning at him. "The point I am making is that there are
some other things that you might see or hear that are just as secret. Do
you understand?"

Slowly he began to comprehend what I'd said. He knew of course of the
relationship between Julius and me, as well as then one he and I
shared. Keeping them private had been no problem until now, and I knew that
he would be able to keep it so.

This time he found his voice, "Of course."

Julius, now in control of himself, looked up and said, "Where do you
sleep?"

"In the stable with the horses," he replied.

"Why?" I asked: I hadn't realised this, thinking he slept in the kitchen.

He looked at me and grinned, "My grandmother snores and the ostler smells!"

"At least you're honest," Julius laughed. "There is a small cell on the
roof you can have for your own."

"Now," he went on. "I need to speak with your grandmother and the ostler to
explain to them, and then I am going out. Angelus will help you sort things
out."

After he'd gone, Philipus and I looked at each other awkwardly.

"Are you pleased?" I said putting an arm on his shoulder

"Yes," he whispered. "Burt can I ask you a question?"

"Of course."

"Are we still friends? I mean can we .....?"

"What's my name. My special name?"

"Amicus," he mouthed.

"And you are Catulus," I said quietly. "That means we are friends for
ever. Or at least until we stop using our special names."

This pleased him greatly and we embraced lightly, kissing each other
quickly.

It only took a few minutes to move him into his new chamber, he had no
possessions other than a spare toga and some very worn sandals. Going
through my belongings I presented him with two of my old togas, some new
sandals and a few other things I could easily replace.

"Now," I said. "I think I need a bath."

His face lit up and he hopped from one foot to the other until he calmed
down.

The bath was quickly filled and I allowed him to remove my toga, conscious
that he was staring at me all the time with that innocent, open-faced look
of his. I stepped into the warm water, holding his hand as I did so.

No sooner was I settled than he gazed at me with a look that meant just one
thing. I grinned at him, opened my legs slightly and nodded.

Nimbly, he stripped off, stepped into the water and knelt between my legs,
staring up at me. I handed him the pumice and soap and smiled. He coughed
slightly and held them out to me, then invitation obvious.

Sighing loudly, I sat him between my legs with his back to me.

Cleaning him didn't take as long as last time and soon he was leaning back
into me, his hard penis in my hand and my own member resting stiffly on his
back. I thought he'd drifted off to sleep until he wriggled and giggled as
I stroked a nipple. Suddenly he rolled over so we were chest to
chest. Carefully he placed my penis between his thighs and gripped it
tightly. His own prick he lay along my stomach.

Slowly he started to slide our bodies together, his penis being rubbed
between us. Leaning down, he placed his lips on mine and kissed me, purring
like a cat. Forcing my hand between us, I grasped a nipple and played with
it gently. He yelped through his kiss and began to rub against me
urgently. When he orgasmed, his lithe little body pressed down hard and I
felt his seed shoot out, long and massively.

I gave him a few minutes to collect himself and then smiled. "We must
hurry.. Julius may be back soon."

We stepped out of the bath and dried ourselves. I picked up my toga and put
it on. Before Philipus could attend to his own, I stopped him.

"You may as well leave your off until you've cleaned the bath," I said. "In
any case, I wouldn't mind betting that Julius will want a bath when he
returns."

He looked at me and a wide smile broke across his face.

I laughed at him, gave him a kiss and a gentle squeeze of his testicles
before leaving him to get on with his work.

Going out and about together with Julius was hard work for us the first few
weeks. Most of his friends accepted the new situation well, and once the
initial bawdy humour has passed, I was accepted as part of the group. Two
of his friends took against me however, and just as Philipus had done,
treated me badly when they knew they wouldn't be found out. To begin with,
I thought it might have been some sort of teasing to see if I could take
the ribbing and so I said nothing to Julius, after all they were friends of
his and had known him longer than me.

One day I had my hands full carrying two jugs of wine to our table when one
of them, a little too much the worse for drink, put his hand into my toga
and squeezed my penis very painfully. In shock, I dropped the wine and
froze. The man wasn't quick enough to move his hand and everyone saw the
reason for my upset. Julius jumped to his feet instantly, his face a mask
of anger, and drew his knife. Before he could act upon his impulse and do
something he would regret, his best friend removed the weapon and began to
calm him down.. At the same time another of our party approached the
offender and gripped his testicles as he had mine, this time giving them a
vicious twist. As the man writhed in agony, something was whispered to him
in his ear which made him turn crimson with embarrassment. Shortly after
this, he left with his friend and we rarely saw them after that. It was a
long time later that Julius told me that the man had been banned from all
the boy brothels in the area because of the way he'd abused them, and now
the only place he could go were the forum or Colosseum.. I smiled wryly: I
knew the type too well and felt sorry for any boy that was unlucky enough
to meet him, and wished in a way that Julius had not been stopped from
hurting him with the knife.

One of the small pleasures that Julius and I enjoyed was visiting some of
the many diversions that Rome had to offer. Places such as the Colosseum
where gladiator contests were held, the Circus Maximus for the horse and
chariot races, the gymnasia for athletics and even some of the theatres: I
found the Colosseum was too blood thirsty for me and the horse and chariot
racing too boring.

We both visited the gymnasia regularly to watch the athletes display their
talents. I had mostly overcome my feeling of shame at seeing naked men;
apart from anything else there were hundreds of statues in Rome of naked
young men throwing spears or discii or just standing looking proudly around
them. What took more getting used to was the sight of athletes performing
completely in the nude in font of an audience. For this reason women and
girls were forbidden entry to the gymnasia at all times. What I did find
most disturbing was the absolute lack of decency among the
spectators. Naturally I found my penis hardening from time to time at the
sight of a particularly handsome youth, but it always embarrassed me and I
took to wearing a tight loin cloth when I went there. Other men were not so
modest, some going so far as to openly fondle themselves as they
watched. The worst thing though was the lewd way some men fondled their
page boys in public, and the boys fondle them back - and they were not
always covered. It was Julius who told me, with great delight, that one
particular gymnasium had the biggest and most expensive boy brothel in Rome
attached to it, where even the sons of the rich and famous went to earn a
few extra denarii and enjoy themselves at the same time.

I began to look forward to our visits to the gymnasia however because more
often than not, both Julius and I would be so aroused that we would hurry
home and satisfy ourselves hungrily and lustfully. Philipus had enough
common sense not to interrupt us whenever we returned home after such a
visit, and in any case we always put a screen across the chamber door as a
sign that we were to be left alone.

Unfortunately we were in such haste this time that the screen was forgotten
about. Julius and I were pleasuring ourselves with our mouths when the door
opened and in walked Philipus with our clean bedding. For a few moments we
stared at each other in some discomfort, no one sure what to do
next. Philipus had seen us in bed together before of course, but never
actually doing anything.

Dropping his eyes to the floor, he put the clothes on the table and turned
to leave, his whole body glowing with confusion.

"Philipus," Julius called softly.

He stopped and turned to face us.

"Come here a moment."

Hesitantly, eyes still cast down, he stood by Julius' head, which at that
time was at the foot of the bed.

"Do you remember that promise you made to Angelus?"

He nodded silently.

"Very well, thank you."

Julius was about to dismiss him when I whispered in Julius' ear. He glanced
at Philipus toga and saw what I meant. Then another quick
consultation. Julius' eyes lit up and he smiled at me.

"Cat," I whispered, using the shortened more familiar form of his secret
name.

At this he looked up and fixed his eyes on me, his face expressionless.

"Are you busy?"

He judged the import of my question instantly and just the slightest trace
of a smile crossed his face.

"No, Sir."

"Would you like to, err, talk with us for a while?"

"If you wish, Sir."

"No," I said. "For once it is your choice. You may leave now, or remain. No
one is commanding you. If you are staying, could you put the screen in
place?"

Philipus almost ran to the door, slid the screen across and scampered
back. I nudged Julius to let him know it was now his turn. Very slowly,
Julius unfastened the cord holding his toga in place and let it slip to the
floor. We both gazed at him for a moment, revelling in his beauty, his
erect penis pointing upwards in its excitement.

"Come," Julius said quietly, taking his hands.

We re-arranged ourselves so our guest was between us, heads together at the
top of the bed.  Julius welcomed him with a chaste kiss on his cheeks, and
much less chaste one on his waiting lips.

It took a considerable amount of time for Philipus to loose his nervousness
with us, but once he'd settled down, he took part with real delight. For my
part, I'd never been in this situation before either, and I found it to be
stunningly erotic. For once, my ability to make seed was in my favour as I
orgasmed twice within a few minutes, only Julius noticing. Philipus was far
too excited, Rome could have fallen for all he would have noticed.

The cot was a seething mass of arms and legs as we moved around, teasing
and caressing each other, lips and tongues exploring every crevice. Somehow
we found ourselves with Philipus straddling Julius, his penis being suckled
and me with Julius between my lips. Suddenly Julius raised his legs on
either side of me, looking into my eyes.

Philipus, noticing the change in postures turned round to see me buried
deep in Julius, my hips moving urgently. His eyes sparkled and he gave me a
broad cheerful grin. He and I had never done this, but at the back of my
mind I knew it wouldn't be long before he wanted to try it.

It was Julius who shot his seed first as far as I know. I'd had at least
four orgasms and was pretty much exhausted, much as Julius must have been
too. Philipus was still excited though, despite the fact that he penis was
now soft and limp.

Reluctantly we disentangled ourselves and lay back, breathing heavily,
grinning happily at each other as we regained our strength.

Unfortunately, because of the unexpectedness of the afternoon, the hot
water for the bath hadn't been prepared. That would take at least an hour,
and so Julius decided to go out to the public baths. Because of my
incompleteness, I wasn't made welcome there and so had to satisfy myself
with a cold wash-down with Philipus.

The passion Julius and I felt for each other grew steadily over the next
months and as a mark of this we actually shared the same bed every
night. My own chamber was converted into a bureau where I took care of the
accounts and other business.

Philipus joined us in our cot only rarely, partly because Julius and I were
happiest when alone and partly because he was too tiring! That isn't to say
he missed out on very much though.  He and I still took pleasure with each
other regularly, and I think he and Julius had a few good times too. I
never asked of course and was never told officially, but I knew Philipus
well enough to know what particular glint in his eye meant, just as Julius
knew what that red glow on my skin was!

All in all we were perfectly content with ourselves and had a life which
was far more satisfying than many. Philipus moved on eventually, succeeding
in obtaining a post as companion to a rich nobleman's son which would fix
him up for life if he was good, which both Julius and I knew he was -
whatever way you look at it! Julius and I grew older together, still very
much in love with one another. Luckily, or unluckily, depending on how you
look at it, his wife was found to have taken a lover of her own which
resulted in the birth of a child.  This meant of course that she was cast
out of her home leaving Julius the whole of his estate unfettered by a
wife. Much to my surprise, it was also half mine!

We each took a boy of our own as body servants and companions, not because
we needed them, but it was expected of people in our station in life. We
took our pleasures with them of course, but we still reserve our love and
real tenderness for each other - something which I thought would never
happen to me. I am a very lucky person.  The End