Chapter 4

"That's one cold motherfucker man..." Craving stated.

It was the next day after the second test. Passion had an ice pack on my head from where I was hit over the head. Craving was talking about Urge. He was eating a cold deli meat sandwich in the dormitory. Urge on the other side of the room alone as usual. He was working out. It was strange to see because his leg was probably still injured but he was still managing to do crunches as if 8 abs were enough.

"I can't believe he just killed Sensuality."

I still remembered it. I still remembered how Urge had stepped behind Sensuality and just snapped his neck. He just snapped his neck like it was nothing. It made me wonder even more who Urge was before this. It made me wonder how he could be so cold.

"He was attacked first," Passion defended him, "It's not like we have a choice here. This is who we have to become..."

"Right...still though..."

"Sensuality would have died anyway. You saw how quick they killed Carnal for failing."

She was right. Craving and I both knew that Passion was right. As soon as Urge and I passed that finishing line the Moderators went over to Carnal and put three bullets in his head. They hadn't even given him a chance to say any final words or beg for his life.

"It's different. The moderators are all brainwashed," I stated shaking my head, "We should still be human. You know. We shouldn't do whatever to survive. He could have knocked Sensuality out or something."

Craving was nodding with me. I knew he understood what I meant. He took a deep bite of his sandwich.

Passion wasn't having it though, "Those sound like the words of a dead man."

She was still probably right. That's the fucked up part of it. I wondered if I could do it. I wondered if I could kill. I knew that I would have to. That is why I was here, but I wondered how it felt. I wondered what Urge was going through. He hadn't stopped working out since he came back. It was almost as though he was more focused now then ever. It was almost like having come so close to losing had made him more desperate then ever.

Passion had walked away. She was heading for the bathroom. I didn't mind not being around her. She was getting colder. I knew I wasn't the only one who was beginning to notice the chance in her personality. Craving was still staring over at Urge.

"Do you feel it bro?" he asked me.

"Feel what?"

I had an idea what he meant but for some reason I still asked.

"How Passion is changing? How everyone is changing," Craving stated shaking his head, "Man I'm not trying to turn into a monster. You know. I'm like religious. I don't want to kill no one. I'm not about that life."

I nodded. Craving definitely didn't seem like he was.

"This is our life now."

"I was drafted into the NFL before I was kidnapped. I had it made man. You know how many teams wanted me? It's fucking ridiculous," Craving started shaking turning around, "One day I went out with a bunch of groupies. You know who was in the group. Lust. I thought was she was so fucking attractive. Then I wake up here...I can't even say my fucking name man..."

"This is our life now..."

"Is that all you're going to say Desire?"

I laid back down. I didn't know what he expected me to say. Maybe it was just easier. Maybe it would have just been easier to be like Urge. Maybe Passion had started to figure it out. Not caring was so much easier than caring.

It was a month before our next training began. In the meantime we had been doing reading. I noticed how hard everyone was studying this time as compared to the first time we were handed books. This time we studied the books as though our lives depended on it. The truth was our lives probably did. It was good having Passion and Craving still around. Ardor was even a good study partner when he wasn't busy with Craving. I knew from the contents of the books what we would be learning almost immediately.

"Welcome to the 3rd Rank," Lust said to us, "There are 8 of you now. Half of you will make it. The other half will not. The next part of training will be the most intensive. Hand-to-hand, weapon handling, pain suppression, poisons, bomb techniques and others will be covered. Unlike the past training this one will be scored daily. Each of you will be assigned a moderator who will study you and score you based on your progression. A cumulative average of your scores will decide how who will be moving on."

The books we had been given were on all these different combat techniques.

In the morning we would do cardio, then we would do weights.

Then the eight of us were taken to a gym where we would practice hand-to-hand. There was a bigger emphasis put on that than anything.

By midday there was lunch.

In the late afternoon more weights.

Every day in the evening there was a different specialty.

On Mondays we did the assault rifle and sniping rifles. On Tuesdays we practiced the standard pistols as well as other ones.. On Wednesdays we did knives. On Thursdays we bomb techniques, poisons and other specialty. On Friday there were specialty things like breathing techniques, chameleon techniques and varied forms of secrecy. The weekend was somewhat downtime but really it was used for just getting in shape.

It was the third week of lessons. It was a Monday when Lust brought us in. Almost every day we had been dealing with hand to hand combat.

"What is Ninjitsu?"

I wondered if it was a trick question. We had been doing it for about three weeks now. Everyday was the same thing. Kick like this. No...not like that. Put your arms like this. Circular motion. Now punch. Now kick.

I had to admit that I was getting bored with the repetition. Repetition was so big here. The Assembly seemed to want to drill something into you until you got so tired of doing it that you did it second nature. We were in a gym when Lust asked us. The moderators were all around us in the gym. They had their pens and paper out. They weren't always around but every time they were we were on our best behavior. We all believed we were getting scored. It had been almost half a year that I had been with the Assembly now. It had been almost half a year that I had known what to expect.

The eight of us were sitting Indian style in the gym. I wasn't the worst at the hand-to-hand but I definitely wasn't the best.

It was Allure who raised her hand, "Ninjitsu is a systematized Japanese martial art used for the specific purpose of espionage."

Allure was a pretty girl with curly hair. She was Russian. She had a thick accent, with brown hair that fell to her shoulders. She looked innocent but I had seen how fierce she could really be just from watching her train at things. She was one of the top in the class for damn sure. There weren't many that were bad though. Ardor was probably one of the weakest but for the most part it seemed like the Assembly had chopped off the extra fat from the group. Everyone seemed good at one thing or another.

"Good. Today you'll be sparring with one another. Practice makes perfect. I want you guys to take advantage of this training time. The moderators will be watching as normal looking out for technique."

Lust walked away. A moderator walked over to her and whispered something. Just at that moment Lust stopped.

"Oh. There's one more thing," Lust stated.

One more thing was usually bad when it came to Lust.

"You'll be sparring naked. In oil..."

My mouth dropped. The gym was huge.

I looked around wondering who I would spar with. Passion had matched up with Allure. Craving had matched up with Ardor. That left Romance, Urge and Glamour.

Romance, Glamour and Allure all usually hung with one another. They were three girls that were somewhat inseparable. A lot of the times it seemed like it was my group against their group. Urge was always in the middle with no group to belong to. For some reason it just seemed like it would be my friends in the final four or them. There was this sense of competition that was going on.

I was making my way towards Romance. She was a talk black chick. She had short hair that was shaved. Craving constantly joked that she was some sort of Amazon or something.

"You want some Desire?" she stated.

"You know I do gorgeous," I said.

There was light flirting going on between me and her honestly. I was attracted to girls to be honest but Romance was no where near my type. She was way too big. It was nice flirting with her though. She blew me kiss and then made a fist as I approached.

Just as I was about to approach her though I noticed Glamour step up. Glamour was the most basic looking out of all of us. She had gotten into an accident in one of the training classes and broke her nose. Sometimes it made me wonder if they need to reconstruct her face again. They didn't however. Maybe they were waiting to see if she was worth it.

Glamour grabbed her friend before I could get to her and pulled her away, "No way I'm sparring with Urge."

Romance shrugged her shoulders, "Sorry Desire."

I turned over to see Urge. There was a reason that no one paired with him. Urge had a way of...embarrassing people in the last three weeks. He wasn't like Allure who answered all the questions during all the classes or anything like that. He was more action than words.

Urge was on the other side of the room. His eyes immediately connected onto me. I walked over toward him and tried to smile. I knew he wasn't going to return the smile but I tried anyway. He didn't even look back at me. He had on that serious Urge face that honestly scared the fuck out of me. I had a feeling I was in for a world full of pain.

"Everyone's scared of you."

"Stop talking and get undressed," he told me being really short, "You don't stand a chance against me anyway..."

"Don't get so cocky. We are all beginners anyway. Three weeks isn't that long to be doing this..."

Urge didn't seem interested in what I had to say. He was already undressing. I couldn't help but to watch him taking off his gray scrubs. He took of his shirt first. That body was on 100%. I mean within the last few months my body was on point as well. It had to be. I didn't know any of us who had more than a tiny bit of fat on them. Craving was probably the heaviest but he wanted to be that way and he was far from fat just husky. The rest of us were lean and strong. Urge was probably the king of it however. His body looked chiseled like he was designed in a workshop somewhere.

I was immediately intimidated as he started to rub oil on his naked body.

The oil went all over his thick legs. He rubbed it on his chest. He rubbed it all over his neck and face.

"You just going to stare at me all day or are you going to get ready?" Urge said.

He wasn't even looking up but he seemed to know that I was staring at him. Hell I was always staring at him. It had to be common knowledge to just about everyone including Urge by now that I was infatuated with him. He paid me no mind as usual however. He acted like I didn't even exist.

Urge had one goal and one goal only.

He wanted to be the best.

"Yeah I...uh...yeah..."

I undressed and started to oil myself up from the oil the moderators supplied. I was nervous doing so. I could already hear some of the others beginning their sparring matches as the moderators watched from a distance. All you heard was all these crazy screams, moans and war cries across the room.

I had practiced though. I was ready.

"Urge! TODAY!" I heard Lust scream from across the room.

I hadn't even noticed that she was watching us. She was so far away.

Urge took that almost literally.

He ran towards me. I hadn't even seen him coming. I saw him immediately come for me sweeping me off the ground. I fell backwards and was about to land on my ass but somehow luckily caught my balance.

"Good balance," he said.

"Thanks."

"You want to show me what you got now?" he asked.

There were only a few things that I knew. I walked over to him probably slower than I should have. Jujitsu was something that I learned in the first week. As I approached him I attempted to grab him. I didn't know how the fuck I managed to be so clumsy with the oil though. I slipped and he disengaged my grapple.

Immediately he turned me around. His body was pressed up against mine. I had to admit it was sexy feeling his manhood pressed up against me. His dick only inches away from my ass covered with nothing but oil. I don't know why I was thinking like this. His dick could probably slide right in if I had bent over a little bit.

"You got to be joking me with that move," Urge said in my ear. His breath was against my cheek. I felt so fucking turned on by him.

"No I meant to do that. I just wanted to grind on you."

He pushed me off all of a sudden away from him as if he was disgusted. I looked at Urge amazed that I had been wrapped up in his arms even if it was in the midst of fighting practice.

Urge looked annoyed by my light flirting, "See and this is why you'll never be able to beat me. Your mind is always in the gutter. You don't know how to focus. That name that they gave you was perfect."

"Desire."

"Yeah. That's all that you're about."

I shrugged my shoulders, "Whatever man. I'm human."

"Human's die. That's your problem. You shouldn't be human anymore. You should be a weapon."

It sounded robotic when he said it. It was almost something like a moderator would say or something. He ran over to me while I was in the midst of replying. I was mid sentence and again I didn't expect it. He grappled me. He put me into a hold. Then he tossed me onto the ground.

I attempted to get up but he pinned me to the ground. He held me there pinning me with his knees. He was sitting on me. His ass was resting on my chest. With his knees pinning me I was useless.

"OK...this is really turning me on. Maybe we should stop," I stated.

I had made it sound like a joke but I was dead serious. My dick was getting hard. It was getting extremely hard feeling Urge on top of me like this. This dude could blink his eyes and it would turn me on. He was that sexy.

He didn't move even when I tried to struggle, "You do realize you're losing points right? The moderators are watching..."

"It's worth it."

"I'm worth dying for?"

"Maybe. I don't know yet."

He seemed confused when I said that as though not getting me. I used that opportunity to lift my legs up at that moment and grapple him with my feet. I used my thighs to pull him down. All the leg weights I had been doing on a daily basis were paying off. I managed to hold him down with my legs even if for a second or two. He disengaged the grapple I had on him and slithered away.

"That was better."

"G'dam your quick," I replied.

I had put all my energy into that and only managed to hold him for a second. The oil made it harder to keep someone in a hold. My legs had slipped and Urge was already on his feet. He had a smile on his face.

"Instead of trying to pin, go for the strangle."

"Are you helping me?"

"Are you listening?" he asked.

I was confused. Urge didn't help people. He was all about himself. I had seen him in classes. He only cared about being number one. He didn't stick around to have conversation or to actually help other people get better. The fact that he was helping me now seemed strange. I felt suspicious almost as suspicious as he was the day I saved him on the trail.

"Yes."

"I'm going to come for you. Instead of trying to pin me go for the strangle. Strangling panics people. Instead of just trying to break a hold they are trying to fight for their lives. They forget about the basics. So strangle me? OK. You only got one shot. I'll make you look good. I promise..."

He came at me at that moment.

He tried to strike me or at least I thought he was trying to strike me but he was much slower than he normally was. I grabbed his arm, twisted it around him and pulled him to the ground. I was about to pin him but then I remembered what he told me. He told me to go for the strangle. I wrapped his arm around his neck and used his own arm to begin to strangle him.

He struggled for a bit to break free but slowly I took hi down to the ground. He started to tap at that moment.

Lust had walked over. It seemed like she was surveying people as well.

"Good work, Desire," she commented before moving on to Romance and Glamour.

I didn't know what this meant. I hoped it meant something that Urge was being nice to me but who knew. He could have just been in a good mood. I couldn't help but continue to look at him even when he was out of my hold. I think it was at that moment seeing him but naked in oil that I knew that there was nothing else in this world I desired more than him. Nothing. Not even my freedom.

I didn't admit my feelings to everyone else. They already knew that I liked Urge. They didn't need to know how much I liked him. I couldn't get him off my mind either. Wasn't that stupid? I was here training to be an assassin and the only thing that I could think about was this boy. I felt like a fucking idiot.

"Damn you suck..." Craving said.

We were at a shooting range when he said it. It was the 8 of us. Passion didn't seem to hang around Craving and I as much. I wasn't sure why. She seemed to be getting focused. Hell everyone was getting focused except me. The only thing I was focused on was Urge. It had been weeks now that I had been practicing with a gun and I wasn't getting any better at it.

"Can you say that any louder?" I stated shaking my head, "The Moderators didn't hear you...."

Craving sighed, "Sorry to be the bearer of bad news but um...they notice. It's only 8 of us. You didn't make a single shot. Why you acting like you scared of the gun or something?"

"Because I am scared of the gun..."

I had always been scared of guns. I hated the things. I had even protested in high school against guns. I had held a whole entire FUCKING protest against guns.

"All guns though? What about the pistol. You're the worst at them out of all of us..."

"I know...

"This is really going to bring down your score..."

"Craving...I know..."

He wasn't helping. I rarely hit my target with the rifles or the pistols or the revolvers. Tom was definitely wasting his ammunition on me. The moderators if they had expressions would definitely not be amused by this kind of shit. Luckily Lust didn't usually attend most of the gun lessons.

I wasn't so lucky at the fact that others were noticing. I noticed Glamour, Romance and Allure laughing their asses off. I wasn't 100 percent sure they were laughing at me but I had an idea that it had to be about me. Even Ardor was better at me then shooting the gun.

"Maybe you should ask Allure for help. She barely misses. And you know there is always Urge too. He's good at everything though. Fucking bastard."

As much as I hated to admit it Craving was right. Urge was good at everything he put his mind to. The guy was a fucking killer already. I wondered if he had been a fucking Hit man or something before he was kidnapped. It would make sense. How else was this guy so fucking good at this shit. It was almost like he had been doing this for a lifetime.

"I'm not begging for help. There are other things I'm good at."

"Like what?"

"Poisons," I answered, "I made the poisons the fastest."

"Times up. Back to the dorms," a moderator stated.

At that moment Passion started walking past us. It had been a while since she had serious conversations with us. I had noticed her staring at me when I was missing the target.

"Hey Passion, can you tell your friend about himself? He thinks being an expert at poisons is going to get him by..."

"I don't bother with the weak."

I was shocked when she said it. I wasn't the only one. Craving had raised an eyebrow. I heard him about to go say something to her but I pulled him back. It was pointless.

"Leave it alone," I told him.

"Do you believe her?" he stated, "All of a sudden she is too good for us? We all started this shit together. Now that she's skated her way to the middle she's too good to fuck with us?"

He was pissed. I could tell. I wasn't though. I had seen signs of it coming from a mile away. Passion was distancing herself from us. I watched as she went over to Glamour, Romance and Allure. She was starting to be around them. Allure was the number one marksman. Romance was great with hand-to-hand combat. Glamour was an all around threat with almost everything. She could learn from them. What did we have? Craving was strong as hell but that wasn't really a skill that could be learned. Then there was me. I was good at ... poisons...

"Fuck it. Fuck her," I stated, shaking my head and turning to Craving, "Look I'm going to take a gun with me to the dorms."

"What?"

"I just need to get comfortable around them."

"I'm pretty sure that is against the rules Desire."

"They never said that."

"I'm pretty sure it is implied that we can't go around taking guns whenever we want to..."

"No one will no. The moderators aren't even paying attention."

I grabbed one of the pistols. I had to get better at them. I knew that it was probably a dumb move but I had to get better. I was going to die anyway if I didn't figure out a combat that I was good in.

Passion had moved her bed over to Allure and her Allure's sidekicks. The four girls gossiped back and forth. I was pretty sure I may have been brought up a time or two. Allure was pretty much the ringleader over there. She was bragging I was sure about her ability to shoot a gun and not be able to miss a thing. Allure seemed to have the ability to keep people really engaged in that way. I couldn't take it.

"Hey, you guys, I'm going to the lockers..." I told Ardor and Craving.

They weren't even listening to me. They were kissing. It was the usual between them.

I had to admit that they made a cute couple and I was fucking jealous of it. I had never met two people that were so into each other as Ardor and Craving. It was weird that they were able to find each other in circumstances like this. They seemed stuck in their own world. Nothing mattered to them. All that mattered was one another. All they cared about was being around each other. They loved one another and even in this hell they had found hope.

As I walked past Allure and the others I saw them staring. Then there was the little girl laughter that I was slowly becoming accustomed to. I can't believe that I was becoming the laughing stock here.

I made my way to the back where there was the gun that I had.

"You don't need it..."

"What?"

Urge was in the locker room. I hadn't even heard him walking up to me. He was quiet. He was extremely quiet.

"You don't need the gun."

I hadn't even taken it out of my gym bag that had all my dirty gray scrubs in it. The moderators usually came to pick up the old scrubs every Sunday in the gym bag and brought us some fresh ones every Tuesday.

"Why do you say that?" I ask.

"You are more comfortable with knives. I see the way you hold them. You've been focusing so much on the gun that you haven't focused on the knives. What were you before this?"

"I was about to go to cooking school."

Urge nodded.

"Exactly. The knives."

"Craving says I need to be good with the guns. Because of the scoring..."

Urge shook his head, "No offense, but your friend is an idiot. Every one needs a major and a minor. One offensive and one skill like hacking, bombs or poison. You are good with poison already. I noticed. So you need one offensive. The offensive should be something like knives. Something you are comfortable with. You should put everything into your knife skills and you'll be fine."

He was helping me again.

"Urge."

"Yes?"

"How do you know this?" I asked.

He turned back to me. He was such an odd guy. He knew way too much. How the fuck did he know how the moderators were scoring us? He wasn't guessing either. He knew for sure. I could hear the confidence in his voice. There was something there that seemed to say it all. I didn't understand it.

"This isn't my first time training."

That didn't make sense.

"What? How is that possible?"

He crossed his arms.

"I am a ... special case. The only one there will ever be here," he explained., "God why am I telling you this. I can't believe I am telling you this..."

I was nervous to know what he was talking.

"You promise not to tell anyone?" he asked me, "If people find out who I am...it's an issue..."

"Yes."

"Promise..."

"I promise."

Just as he was about to tell me we heard bells. What the fuck was Lust doing here at this time of night? I turned over to him. Urge seemed to snap out of this sharing moment all of a sudden. He seemed like he was back in his own mind state.

We walked over to the front and joined the others who were already lined up. Lust were there and she had three moderators with her. The moderators weren't the only ones there though. There were gentlemen...bigger gentlemen. I was sure they were assassins maybe from another team or something that the moderators had called. What the fuck was this about?

"There was an audit of the guns," Lust stated, "One of them is missing. Which one of you took them?"

I was an idiot. Why wouldn't I think they audited the guns? Why wouldn't I think these robotic ass fucking people would take daily audits of everything?

I was about to step forward but I felt a hand on my shoulder. I looked to my side to notice it was Urge. What the fuck was he doing? Before I was about to step forward he grabbed me and he stepped forward for me.

"You are going to kill the person who took the gun without consent aren't you?" he asked her.

Lust nodded, "Yes. Tom has strict rules about this."

"Then it was me..."

Lust nodded.

"No...no wait!" I screamed.

It was useless though because of Craving. Craving had put his hand over my mouth and was pulling me back towards the back of the dormitory.

All I saw was them taking him. The men started hitting him all of a sudden and when he was limp underneath them they started to drag his body. Urge didn't even fight back. All I saw was them taking Urge. Why had he done it? Why had he sacrificed himself for me!

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