Date: Mon, 18 Mar 2002 07:30:35 -0800
From: Rick Beck <bjwalkerjr@37.com>
Subject: Billie Joes Journal 13

Thanks to BP for editing assistance.

Billie Joe's Journal
By: Rick Beck

Chapter 13
Communion

	Hitch hiking down from Seattle had been an eye opener. Meeting
Raymond and then Sven and Ingmar was worth the discomfort and
difficulties. Working for a furniture mover for a week was interesting, but
making friends was down right good. Earl wasn't like anyone else. He was an
artist, he was gay, and so I guess that gave him a lot of room to be
different. I'd neither known an artist and damn few gays, so everything I
learned was pretty new and exciting.

	It only took a few hours for Earl and I to be touching each other
in more than a friendly way. This scared me. It was exciting, and I wasn't
scared of doing stuff, but I was scared this was the way it was going to
be. It hadn't been a few hours before Raymond and I were doing it my first
day on the road. Then it was only a few days after hooking up with Ingmar
and Sven that I wanted to be involved with Sven. I didn't want to be like
that. I wanted to find my love and stick with him, but I thought my only
real shot at that so far had been Carl, and eight days after we met, he
left for Japan for a year. Not exactly something I needed to help me get my
feet planted firmly under me.

	I wanted to believe that Carl would return to me but Japan was a
long way away and a year was a long time. Those eight days we spent
together paled in comparison to the time we must endure apart. My heart
told me that Carl was who I wanted but my brain was telling me that I
couldn't bank on that. The odds were against us and like with my family, I
needed an alternative.

	The decision was made to travel and to try to find some gay support
group or at least people I could depend on. Then I would return home and
come out to my family. If they threw me out on my ear, which I strongly
suspected they would, then I had a back-up plan. I'd read about kids being
tossed out on the street after coming out or after being found out.

	To top it all off my best friend had committed suicide rather than
live a gay life. Ralph feared he would be found out and rejected or worse
and instead of taking the risk, he took the easy way out. Easy for him
maybe, but for me it had left me doubting my life and everyone in it. My
curiosity and need to find myself were the other factors that had me on the
road. Earl lived in another world and I found myself in the middle of it.

	Earl told me his grand mother was related to Kaiser Wilhelm of
Germany. In fact he had royal blood flowing through his veins. All his
ancestor were artists and aristocrats and they had been welcome in the
courts of all Europe in the nineteenth century. He sounded very much like
this should be a very big deal to me, but it wasn't. He was a rather
ordinary if pretty boy.

	He showed me pictures and items he told me were from that
period. He had one picture with the Kaiser riding a pure white horse and he
had a helmet with large plumes of feathers coming out of the top. The horse
and the rider looked imperial. He showed me someone in the picture and said
it was his great grand father, cousin to the emperor. I must admit there
was a resemblance to Earl.

` From time to time while Earl took me back into his history, his hand
rubbed my leg and my arm as we looked at items he took the time to show
me. He seemed quite proud of his heritage. He also liked touching.

	Late in the afternoon we lie on the bed looking at each other and
he started asking me about my life. I told him everything I knew about my
relatives in three minutes. We'd been in Minnesota for four generations. My
father was the first college graduate in our family, and he'd been a real
success. I was expected to follow in his footsteps, but I had proved to be
a big disappointment in school. Hopes had started to wane that I might
amount to something.

	I told him about the bus trip to Seattle, meeting Carl, saying
good-bye to Carl and hitting the road. He understood my need to find out
what my life was about. He too had left home at a very early age. It hadn't
been the crapshoot of my departure, because he wasn't ever more than a few
hours from home. He described to me the feeling of emptiness inside, and
how the longing was sometimes stronger than his intellect.

	Even in the face of danger he many times had put himself into
situations he knew he should avoid. He thought I didn't have that tendency
to face off with danger, though he thought I lacked the proper fear for
doing what it was I was doing. He assured me that I could return there if
things went bad for me. He had no plans to go out to meet anyone, and he
was always home. I think he envied me but he no longer had the desire that
once had driven him to the city by the bay.

	Earl gave me a lot to think about. By the time he fixed us a tuna
casserole for dinner, I felt pretty comfortable around him. The fact we had
made out all over the house by dinner time made it easier for me to see him
as a friend. He was fun and funny in an odd sort of way. I felt like I was
with someone my age, and I hadn't felt that way since Ralphie killed
himself the month before.

	There's something about losing your best friend that leaves you
more empty, more alone in the world. The fact he was gay and I didn't know
it, and I was gay and he didn't know it, that really sucked in an odd
way. I think they call it ironic but it was just a cruel joke to me. When I
talked my brother into inviting me out to Seattle, I knew it was to get
away from Ralphie or at least his memory.

	Earl did put on shorts to fix dinner, and I appreciated that. I'd
been turned on all afternoon, and I was starting to hurt from the tension
building in different body parts. Even in the tight shorts I found Earl too
attractive for words. He is the only person I've ever known that could get
away with being naked all the time. Clothes only covered the beauty. It
helped that we lived in a world without adults to stimulate our guilt.

	He proved to be a good cook, and he assured me the casserole was
his grand mother's recipe. He'd lived with her on and off and spent summers
with her when he wasn't living there. She taught him about her life, her
country, and introduced him to cooking, sewing, and doing laundry. He said
the things she taught him were the things he used most. Especial the music
he didn't appreciate until he got older.

	After we ate he took me back to the workroom and played several
piano pieces. His hands moved along the keys like they were part of the
piano. He said he failed as a concert pianist because of the size of his
hands. It hadn't been his destiny to play the piano professionally, but
that just turned his interest toward his painting. His grand mother left
him the trust to be sure he could continue to paint every day.

	I sat next to him and he showed me chopsticks. I imitated what he
showed me, but I didn't learn anything. We laughed and giggled and ended up
wrestling on the floor on a Persian rug, whatever that is. It wasn't much
of a wrestle. We rolled around with Earl unable to show any sign of muscle
or dominance. We ended up hugging and kissing beside the piano bench.

	"You still feel awkward, Billie Joe?" He asked, looking up at me
with those clear eyes.

	"No. I feel like you are closer to my age than anyone I've met out
here."

	"That's because I don't have any pressure on me. I do what I
want. I'm still a kid, but I don't have to be grown up. I've got everything
I need or want. Everything but love, Billie Joe."

	"You shouldn't have any trouble finding love. You are one of the
most attractive people I've ever known. You are beautiful you know."

	"It's not any fun, Billie Joe. Everyone wants to make it with you,
and no one wants you because everyone else does. I just want to settle in
with someone, but no one thinks I'll stay. I'm too pretty for my own
good. Too pretty to keep."

	I pressed his hair back off his forehead and kissed his fine
lips. They were pale, but a nice contrast for his skin. His nipples were
pale, almost a pastel. They were large considering he was small. When I
kissed him he rubbed his hands up and down my thighs stopping just at the
point he brushed up against my bulging shorts. I could feel him swelling up
under my leg.

	"I've got a special need, Billie Joe. If we sleep together, I need
something special from you."

	"What is it."

	"I've seen you looking at my rearend. I've seen the look a hundred
times. I know what it means."

	"What?"

	He reached further than he'd gone before and grasped me.

	"You're going to be big for me. I'm small in so many ways. I don't
want to scare you off, but I need to be prepared before I can take it the
way you want to give it to me."

	"How do you mean?"

	"I can't explain it. I'll show you when you are ready."

	"You've got the evidence. I can't hide it while you're holding
it. I've been ready since you kissed me in the doorway. I'd have thrown you
on the floor right then. I don't know why, but it's what I wanted to
do. I've never been like this. I mean I might jack off twice in a day, but
that was rare. Now, I meet someone, and an hour later I want to be doing it
with them."

	"It's because you can. You never could before. It was too
risky. Now you are in the candy shop, and you're looking at all that candy
and you can have almost any you want, Billie Joe. You are every gay man's
dream. Most of them would love getting your tender young ass in their bed."

	"It's not what I'm talking about. I'm talking about you. I don't
care about people wanting me. It's not why I came out here. I came out here
to see what being gay meant. Every time I turn around I'm meeting someone,
and all I can think about is doing it with them. It's just different I
guess."

	"It's only eight. You would like to go to bed with me?"

	"I don't care what time it is. Yes, I would like."

	Earl lie on his back and pulled my shirt up on my shoulders so I
would take it off. He stared at my chest and ran his hands across it.

	"You got muscles."

	"Not much. I'm starting to grow. My pants are shorter on me. My
shirts are getting tighter."

	"You're getting a body. You're going to be fine, Billie Joe. You
are handsome, and going to have a hell of a body. You've got nice legs. All
of them. Let's go to my room."

	Earl dragged me by the hand, and I watched his ass as he strained
to pull me faster. He sat me down on the bed and went to a dresser and
started putting out different items including a condom. I saw the
lubricant, but didn't recognize the brightly colored plastic tube. There
were two long slender items, one looked like a phony penis. The other was a
straight cylinder type affair not as wide as the other. He then brought out
two pair of handcuffs. That really confused me.

	"You ready?"

	"Yeah, but what's all that stuff."

	"I'll show you."

	"I haven't done this in months, so I'm tight. I mean real
tight. You'll lubricate this small dildo, and real gently you'll put it
inside me. I mean real gentle. After using it on me a few minutes, then
you'll use the larger one. That ones not as wide as you, but almost. Then
when you get inside me, I'll be able to handle it."

	"The handcuffs?"

	"I like to be handcuffed when you do it. I don't want to touch any
of the items. It's more fun for me that way. Once you get in me you can do
what you want. I mean you can really do it hard if you like. I'll be ready
for it by then. These will make it better for you when you start. I'm told
I'm as tight as it gets when it comes to screwing boys. I'm told that most
people have never been in a tighter spot, and you're wider than many of
them."

	Earl handcuffed himself to one bed post, and handed me the
handcuffs to attach him to the other post so he was face down. I could see
just a trace of hair under each of his arms. I opened the plastic tube and
applied the liquid to the first cylinder. I rubbed it all over his hole
before placing the cylinder at the opening. He lie perfectly still letting
me do it on my own.

	The tip rested right at the spot and I tried to push it in without
doing it suddenly. I applied more lubricant twice and by the time I
finished the second application, Earl was starting to twist back on it a
little. I watched his body as I pushed the tip just past the muscle. I
watched it twitch and his legs bent up. His lower leg bent up and his upper
leg straighten out as he was mostly on his left side. He still didn't make
a sound. The cylinder was now an inch inside him, and as I watched his
manhood, I was astounded at it's increase in size as I slid the item in
further. It twitched and jumped and a clear liquid leaked onto his leg in a
steady stream. With less than half of it inside him, he was half again his
original size and the head was swollen tight and turned dark blue as the
fluid ran out of it. I slid the other three inches in using a single steady
motion, and he thrust his hips upward depositing the liquid onto the
sheet. His hips seemed to be on a pivot as he worked his ass on the
cylinder.

	"Take it out and use the big of the two now. I'm ready. You're
good. That's perfect so far. I'll be ready for you when you do it to me."

	I felt funny putting the liquid on what looked like the head of a
cock. It was half again as thick as the other one, and maybe a little
longer. I knew I was thicker, but something about this operation was
causing me to cream myself.

	"Come on, Billie Joe. I'm ready for it. Go ahead and put it in me."

	There was a plea in his voice. I placed the firm head at his
opening and he was helping me this time. By the time I'd worked the tip
into the hole, he slid the entire head in with one firm wiggling
motion. The flesh colored shaft looked quite realistic. I watched his grow
as he elevated his hips and worked his ass on the new phony dick. I found
myself continuing to issue liquid into my shorts I inserted the new entry
up into him.

	His dickhead grew to an amazing plumpness when compared to its
appearance at rest. The color and size excited me in a purely lustful way,
and the intensity of what this activity was doing to his body made me as
hot as I'd ever been. I used the shaft like I would my own, and I pushed
and pulled it three or four inches in and out. He moaned his approval and
his arms stretched against the handcuffs.

	His ass resembled a tiny mouth consuming everything within its
reach. I felt myself twitching and pulsing and I realized that this
activity might ruin me before I was ready. I deserted the dildo and my hand
shook as I tried to roll on the sheath of pleasure. I watched my own shaft
swelling from my excitement, my touch, and the warm hugging latex. I might
have finished right then if not for a sudden need to please Earl.

	As quick as I got past the ring I was sliding inside. I'd never
felt anything so tight, so warm, so exciting. It was like his hole was
fitted for me. I slid in until my black hairs mingled with the white crack
of his ass. It was then I, had to lean against him to keep from passing out
or worse. My head got all squirrelly from the thought of it, and once again
I became afraid that I might pull one of my instant orgasm scenes. I fought
off the urge to let it go while thinking about my teacher's wart. It always
worked for me.

	I reached around him to feel his steaming appendage throbbing to my
touch. I was forced to halt all motion to swallow hard and regroup once I
was buried in him.

	His one word plea awoke me, "Hard!" He whispered.

	I knew he had expectations that I had to fulfill if I were to move
to the next level. I wasn't sure what that was but I was sure the only way
to get to it was with Earl's approval. I shifted my hips into gear while
pushing out all ideas that I was already ready to lose control.

	Within a minute I was sweating from the hard fucking I was giving
this fragile boy. I was rather proud that I hadn't lost my load and now I
was in control of the situation, at least until he spoke of grander things.

	"Do it as hard as you can. I'm ready now. Fuck me hard, Billie
Joe."

	Fuck him hard? Where's this kid been? This refrain angered me to no
end. I was giving as good as I knew how, and he wanted harder? I'd give him
harder. I lost track of the sweat and the heat and even the feel of him
under me. It became that hole and my shaft and there were no restraints. I
gave myself up for speed and raw power. I'd give it to him hard if that's
what he required. He'd know he'd been to a fucking when I got done.  My
hips drove, the sweat flew, and I drove on to a slapping sound that created
its own music. Then, with a few more words he disarmed me.

	"You okay, Billie Joe," the sweet tones inquired as I slowed to
listen.

	"Yeah. I'm just trying to calm down here. You are tight for sure."

	"You're great. You know how to fuck. You can jack me off if you
want. I liked it while you were doing that. Do it while you're fucking
me. Like you were doing was most excellent."

	As I panted and reached around under him I seized his cock in an
effort to satisfy his desire.

	"Jesus, Earl. You feed this thing fertilizer. It's twice the size
it was before. It's huge."

	"It does than when I get fucked proper. I guess it's what turns me
on best. Most guys can't stay with it long enough to get it up. It's extra
large when I find someone like you. Sometimes it gets so big I think it
might burst. Oh! Yeah! That's it Billie Joe. Just stroke it easy. We don't
want to finish up too soon. Go ahead with what you were doing. I can handle
it."

	It didn't take long for me to get rolling. Earl made it an
experience I wouldn't forget. My hand was filled with sticky liquid and I
used it to rub back into him. The more I slid in and out and jerked him
off, the more intense he got. He moaned loud and wiggled and twisted using
the handcuffs for leverage to force himself back hard on me.

	It took a few minutes for me to get to the peak, but I knew it had
come too quick. He said to tell him when I was ready, and when I started
moaning he knew. He forced his smooth ass all the way down on me and I held
his waist and pressed into him. The harder I went the more intense it
became until I couldn't breath. I shuddered a few times and then just held
him against my over heated body.

	"You can pull out now," he said.

	I slipped down on my knees and withdrew.

	"Put the rubber on me, Billie Joe."
	"It's used up Earl. I filled that sucker up."

	"Just do as I say. Put it on me now. Hurry while it's still hot."

	I slid the rubber off real careful so I wouldn't spill the load of
juice I left in it. I leaned against him and slid it up over his swollen
penis. As I slid it up he moaned real loud and his entire body tightened.

	"That's it. Jack me off. Get behind me and jack me off. Hurry. I
can't hold it for much longer."

	It squeezed and squished and he moaned and groaned and swell all up
even more, and in less than a minute his body jerked hard and pitching and
pulling against those handcuffs. I could feel the hot liquid pumping into
the over full condom.

	"That's hot. Your cum was still hot. I could feel your hot juice on
me. Oh that was the best, Billie Joe. You know how to show a guy a good
time," excited boy huffed and puffed as he told me how good it was for him.

	"That's about the strangest thing I ever done," I said.

	"It turned you off?"

	"No, it didn't turn me off. It was hot. You're hot. I just can't
believe I did what you said. I can't believe how much I liked it all. It's
so, so, sexual and nothing but."

	"That's what sex is about. Doing it in a way you really like. You
can undo the cuffs."

	I took the keys he set out and set him free. He immediately wrapped
himself up around me.

	"Sex is about setting each other free. As long as you aren't
hurting anyone it's fine to explore the fringes. I wasn't sure you'd go
with me."

	"We didn't make love. We didn't really have sex together. I made
love to your ass maybe. I worried I would hurt you, Earl, but not enough to
stop."

	"You gave it to me pretty good," he said, panting in my ear as our
sweat mingled.

	"I can't stop once I get started. I mean I'm more interested in
getting off than anything else once I start getting turned on like that."

	"Did you get off?"

	"You know I filled that thing up."

	"I know you did. That made it hotter for me. Sometimes it's nice to
have control or to give up control. It adds a dimension to the sex. Didn't
you find it stimulating?"

	"You call it stimulating. I call it going nutso. I get to a point
where I'm wild to get it."

	"I know. That's what made it so good for me. I almost couldn't hold
it until you put the condom on me. Then, Wow, it just rolled through me
like a big wave. It was one of the keepers."

	"If you want me to sleep with you let's put this stuff away. One
time doing it this way is okay, but I don't want to get in the habit of
using stuff to get off."

	I watched Earl put the things back in his dresser after cleaning
them up in the bathroom. He finally removed the condom and made a ceremony
of putting our combined juices upon his stomach so it would run down to his
equipment. He took delight in matting down his light blond cock hair with
the ooze. His sagging manhood stood back out as he worked some into the
head. The shaft maintained a thin unimposing look with its pale pink tint,
but the head once more ballooned out somewhat.

	In a minute he was heaving and pitching against the dresser, and a
spurt of cum shot out into the middle of the floor. His knees buckled and
he pumped frantically to get two more long streams shoot out and then a
steady dripping. I got cotton in my mouth watching him excite himself to
climax with my cum. His manhood immediately sagged over and the head
reduced in size almost immediately.

	"Time for a shower. I'll be back in a minute. I always need to do
that to calm down. We'll get a good nights sleep now. I won't need to
bother you."

	We did get a good night's sleep. Earl curled up inside my arms. I
noticed my body seemed to be large compared to his. His shoulders fit
inside my arms and leaned back against my chest. My arms easily enveloped
him. Either he was smaller than I thought, or I was growing. It was the
first time I ever felt larger than someone older than me. This made me feel
good, like I was growing up and able to protect someone.

	Earl had a different apron for cooking. It was a green and white
with white ties and a pink duck in the corner. He moved around cracking
eggs and preparing flour and stuff. He poured me coffee, and supplied ample
amounts of real cream and sugar. We ended up with ham and cheese omelets
and fresh biscuits. Earl saw how much I enjoyed biscuits the morning
before.

	He served me like I was a prince or something and wouldn't allow me
to do anything but eat. He was meticulous and cleaned up each item as he
used it. Many times he dirtied and cleaned the same item several
times. Everything seemed to be in easy reach of where he worked. He waited
to eat until everything was put away except the dish and silverware he
used.

	I still kept my hands in my lap to hide my nakedness. From time to
time he held one or both. It is both exciting and scary to be naked. My
mind is not prepared to accept so many new things. The dress code did save
us a lot of time once we decided to roll around on the floor making out on
that plush Persian rug. They were languid days spent pampering all of our
senses.

	By noon I was back in Earl's bed submitting to a message he
insisted I have. This is another first save the times my coach had rubbed
smelly ointment on a sore spot in my leg. Earl takes the time to burn
incense and to heat the oil. My track coach missed those lessons at massage
school.

	His hands are the perfect temperature and have the perfect feel as
he leans over me rubbing my neck and shoulders and kissing my lips as his
erection tempted mine. The oil is another experience I am ready to have. I
suspect the way he uses his hands is meant to keep me more excited than
relaxed. While he works and massages every muscle, he takes the most time
on my stomach and in my thick black hair that surround my now perpetual
erection.

	He never once touched me there, and worked the inside of my thighs
using his fingers to brush my low hanging balls. The same sticky juice he
leaks constantly while touching me is now freely flowing from the slit of
my own penis. It drips down the top and puddles in my raven hairs at the
thick base of my cock. I looked at myself as he did my thighs. Mine was
dark in color. There were several dominant veins. The more I am massaged
the harder it gets and I know there is only one thing that will take the
wind from my sails.

	When he had me roll over onto my stomach the evidence of my
complicity disappeared but in this case out of sight out of mine didn't
follow. Earl rubbed himself in my crack as he did my shoulders. He leaned
hard against me there. The stickiness ran down across my hole and between
my legs. It was a hot liquid now. His hands pressed firm on my muscles and
made me squirm.

	This constant contact had my insides steaming but it stayed at one
level and never progressed into the heated exchange I now desired. His
hands work their way down my back and into the crack of my ass. His fingers
trace and touched every part of me. The oil is soothing and thrilling as he
uses it to insert his finger into me after kneeling quietly between my
knees for awhile.

	I decide not to resist as I'm pulsing and jerking from the thrill
of the long awaited escalation. I watched him go to the dresser and bring
back the small cylinder he'd used the day before.

	"I don't think I want that inside me, Earl."

	"Trust me. This will get you where you want to go. You're body is
begging for relief. In a few minutes you are going to have an orgasm that
will take you into the heavens. I'll stop if you want me."

	He ran the cylinder up and down the crack and puts the hot oil on
it to warm it. I feel it at my opening and I feel his finger pressing and
opening me. Then the hard feel of the tube is obvious. He eases it into the
ring and there is a sharp pain at my hole. There is a tingling pressure
inside my penis that had it throbbing even more vigorously than before and
it was an incredible source of pleasure.

	He slides the tube in slow and steady. My brain ran into a fog as
he manipulated the object. The pain that came from where my hole was
tightening on the intruder is directly connected to the pleasure in my
cock. I didn't know how it worked but at the time I really didn't care. I
thought I was going to lose it if I so much as touch myself. I remembered
the night I watched Raymond sliding up and down on Sven's pole and how he
exploded without anyone touching his thing.

	"Roll over," Earl said.

	"With it in my ass?"

	"It's all the way in. Roll over. You'll be glad you did."

	I rolled over and my penis stood larger and thicker than ever. The
clear liquid ran from the tip and in places it had dried in streams. The
feel of the item in my ass was a stimulation I couldn't imagine. I watched
myself as Earl rubbed my thighs and between my legs and put oil down on my
balls and back between my legs.  His hands were stronger and more forceful
as he worked up beside my cock. Both his hands rubbed me hard and at the
same time they grasped me and started to stroke me in slow motion while he
squeezed hard.

	"Don't fight it. Let it go. It's time to let it go."

	I watched myself but it didn't seem like that was my penis at
all. Mine had never swelled that large or turned that dark or felt that
hard. His hands worked it firmly and I could feel the hot sperm boiling up
inside me as he squeezed the shaft hard as he stroked in one long firm
motion until his fist collided with my balls. The white liquid leaped out
of me and into the air in slow motion, landing on my chest, scalding my
skin as I gasped for air.

	He stroked faster as I shot another spurt into the air. My muscles
grabbed hard at the item in my ass and a hot thrilling flash ran through
me, and I hit my chest and stomach with more liquid when Earl pulls the
cylinder free of my ass in one liberating move. When my ass hole slammed
shut it ignited a round that splattered me in the face.

	I felt like I was floating and falling at the same time while the
bed was spinning around like a bucking bronco. Before I'm able to breathe
Earl is on top of me pressing his body into my mess. He uses it to slide up
and down until he is shaking and vibrating and making his own deposit in
our bank of love. His weight is nothing on top of me. I hold him as I try
to catch my breath in spite of the added weight.

	We lie there together for several minutes. Our skin cooled down
some.

	"You're a gold mine of thrills, Billie Joe. You're like an empty
book just waiting to be filled."

	He sat down beside my leg and scooped up the liquid in his hand and
over his fingers. He grasped himself messaging it in to his penis and into
his cock hair. He scooped up more of the puddle and worked it into his
balls. In a minute he was pumping and jerking in spasms that announced
another orgasm. His own hand gave him immense pleasure when combined with
my cum. I watched the liquid shoot out of him and onto the floor as the
pumping slowed and then stopped.

	He fell back across my legs once it was over.

	"That was the best," he whispered.

	We hit the shower soaping each other up until we were squeaky
clean. He used a clear soap he told me was German. His grand mother had
cases of it in the basement. He didn't use any chemicals or anything that
wasn't natural on his skin. He used a powder when he dried off. It gave his
skin a white tint until it disappeared into his skin. He smelled wonderful
once he had finished.

	It took us two hours to sleep off our hard work. He sat on top of
me shaking me awake as he giggled.

	"We are going to the Ocean. I need to see the Ocean today."

	"The Pacific?"

	"Yes. I didn't know there was another. Tell me you're joking."

	"Several others."

	"No matter. This is the important one. This is mine. I have a
special place."

	"You're going to share your ocean with me," I joked.

	"You have earned a right to anything I have. You are my hero."

	"Why's that."

	"Because you are with me. You interrupt the silence in a most
charming way. I am forever in your debt."

	"I'm glad you like me. I like you, too."

	"Then you shall stay with me. Go to school just up the
street. We'll keep house and make love and visit my ocean often."

	"I can't."

	"I thought not," he said. "If you ever have the need, you will
remember I am here for you."

	"I will," I said, feeling oddly like I wouldn't.

	The ocean was different than I expected. There were pieces of land
I could see out in the water. This wasn't the end to all land as I thought
it would be. The shore was ragged with rocks and there was no beach to
speak of. Earl knew a place where we could walk for a hundred yards before
it all ran back into the sea. The beach was bordered by the endless
impenetrable rocks and they were pounded by the relentless surf, forming a
barrier to anyone wishing to pass.

	The water was cool and not so very inviting. He told me only a few
hours a day was the beach exposed. Most of the time the water ate against
the rocky shore. The water seemed to rise and fall in swells. The surf was
small. The air was fresh and clean if a bit stiff.

We held hands when we walked or sat. It wasn't anything like at the
house. We were simply friends out together for a stroll.

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