Date: Tue, 10 Jun 2003 23:08:14 -0500 From: B. Bliss Subject: Bliss Fever Part 1 This is a work of fantasy, i.e. fiction. It takes place in an alternate universe, in which the bliss fever is a bit stronger, inhibitions are a bit weaker, and beautiful boys tend to sleep naked. Nothing is meant to be taken as encouragement for any actions in the real world. If you don't understand the difference between fantasy and reality, or if you believe fantasy to be dangerous, especially fantasies in which teenage boys have sex with one another, you shouldn't read it. I can assure you that all the boys in this story are played by actors who are over 18 (documentation on file). If some of them look younger, well, that's just your imagination. In the spirit of the Internet this writing is offered as a gift. I ask that you receive the gift with respect and don't rip me off by copying or reposting it in whole or part without my permission. Naturally I am interested in your response. ** BLISS FEVER, Chapter One Later, when I was helping him clean up, his face still streaked with tears and snot, Matthias still wouldn't tell me what had happened. He had been naked when I found him among the other boys, and was still naked when I had carried him out of the bunk, his thin body trembling in my arms, holding on to me for dear life, his head buried in my shoulder, his legs wrapped around my hips, his warm crotch pressed against me. I don't know why I felt like I had held him before, had always been holding him. Maybe it was because, although I hadn't admitted it to myself, I had been longing to take him in my arms from the first time I saw him. And the longing was like a memory of the future, of what this moment was going to feel like. His hair caressing my cheek, his weight in my arms, his skin against my skin. An innocent moment. So why was my cock so hard, pressing against my jockeys in its bliss fever? I'm getting way ahead of myself. I do that. I like to tell stories, and the thing about a story is, at least the way I tell them, it's never a straight line from beginning to end. I guess that's because, life, the way it comes to me, is stories inside stories, and it's hard to tell one without telling another. Stories about sex are especially so, since I've noticed that where sex is concerned, everything is a little more complicated. Did I say a little? It's not like those stories I've read on the internet, a quick line from A to B with orgasms every paragraph, semen on the wallpaper, 9 inch cocks, insert tab A into fold B. Oh, there's orgasms in my story, and lots of cum too (I did say it's a story about boys, and sometimes I think most of the 66% water which composes our bodies is the white stuff). When I think back over the events I'm going to tell you about, I sometimes feel a warmth in my heart, and sometimes a heat in my groin, and usually both. Because it's a story about love and it's also a story about lust, the lust that happens between boys who are becoming men, and have the bodies of men, at least the cocks and the appetites of men, but still I guess the hearts of boys. And the boy's heart loves other boys, that's just the way it is. But where there is love and lust, things are never a straight line. So be a little patient. I'll get to the sex soon enough. It's just, if I leapt into it now, I would already have lost the feel of the way it really happened. Because in this story, every moment of pleasure I shared with the other boys was preceded by longing and anticipation which made the moments, when they came, last forever. That's the bliss fever. This all happened just a few years ago, but I know when I'm 90, if I live that long, I'll still be thinking about it. I'll still be thinking about Matthias' body and about Gil's body, and the way our bodies fit together, and when I think about that I'll already be half way back to the teenboycome (if I had my way there would be a single word for that) that never ends, that I hope never will end.. So I was telling you about cleaning up Matthias, and before that finding him naked. But really the story has to start before then, before summer. Just before I was 18, and I had planned for a year the way I was going to spend this summer, between high school and college where I was going to study creative writing. The plan: my girlfriend Cintra and I were going to hitchhike around France. We had been going out since partway through Grade 11, and we really cared for one another. There was a meeting of minds that brought us together, and I was hungry for it to be more than that. Although as I have promised this story is mostly about sex with boys, the fact is it starts with me trying desperately, for many months, to get into Cintra's pants. If I hadn't liked her so damn much I would for sure have given up. Two weeks before we were supposed to leave, I decided to make my stand, so to speak. I was tired of going home and rushing to my room for a solo tug on my hard and lonely cock. It was getting late, and Cintra and I were in her back yard, soaking in her parents' hot tub, when I announced I'd prefer to be doing so without my bathing suit, and promptly removed mine. I was hoping she'd follow suit but instead she got mad, and one thing led to another, things were said which couldn't be taken back. I had a raging hard-on when the argument started and it was like my hard-on was doing the talking and it didn't give a damn about Cintra's feelings. I left her crying and our planned trip in tatters. I figured I would call her in the morning, but in the morning I felt resolute that it was up to her to make a move, and she didn't and we didn't talk. I consoled myself with my latest method of jerking off, which consisted of positioning myself in front of the full-length mirror on my closet door, and doing a slow striptease. Did I mention that I'm a swimmer? It's given me a body I'm proud of, long and lean and firm. I don't think I'm any more narcissistic than the next guy, it's just the amazing thing of noticing something different about your body every time you look in the mirror. I felt like I was mutating from a kid never fully at home in his body, to the shape of a man which just seemed more like me, at last. My mom has this coconut skin cream, just the smell of it makes me think of the beach. Well actually, by now, the smell of it makes me think of sex, at least with myself. I had been using so much of it I finally bought my own bottle to keep her from getting suspicious. Now, stripped down to my underwear, I spread the cream across my chest and began to swirl my hand across the skin. As I tugged on my nipples, I could see them hardening in the mirror, and my cock was growing under my other hand, until it was reaching out of the band of my jockies. Finally in one move I pull down the underwear, and God it feels great to be free of all clothes, and to see my cock in the mirror. In its size, shape, everything, it embodies this mysterious now country of manhood I have yet to begin taking for granted. I feast my eyes on it. Now. My cock is going to be an important player in this story, though I can assure you that there is no point at which it will not remain attached to my body, even though there will be times when the tail might be wagging the dog. I will try to describe what I see when I look at it, and I'll do the same for my friends, because I know their cocks are as important to them (and for that matter to me) as mine is to me (and them, I hope). But there is one word I won't use and that is "inches." For one thing, I'm Canadian, and we use the metric system. I could, then, use centimeters, which would have the benefit of yielding an even higher number. But my objection is to measurement. Every time I read someone's porn where so and so does such and such with his XX inches, I have the image of dudes with rulers sticking out from the crotches. Just doesn't turn me on. (For that matter, it seems like most porn is written by someone in too much of a hurry to come. But you didn't come to me for literary criticism so I'll shut up about that now and get back to my cock.) My cock. At the moment, I am daubing, with a few fingers, some of the Skin Trip (the coconut stuff) along the underside of the shaft. I am putting off as long as possible the moment where I really start to pull on it, because for whatever reason I am more turned on than usual looking at my swimmer's body in the mirror, and it really does seem like my cock has grown bigger. The hell with the light touch. I apply a good squirt of the lotion directly, and wrap my hand around. My cock is a two hander, and I have pretty big hands. Though if I use one of my hands to cup my balls, which I'm doing now, I can watch my cock thrusting through the one hand (I didn't say I didn't care about size, just about measurement.) After that, I think you know how it goes. If you're going to be auto-erotic, go all the way I say, and while my cock has its way with my hands (because there's no doubt what part of my anatomy is calling the shots at this point) my eyes do their best to take the whole thing in. And I feel a bit of what I will later come to know as the fever, as this feedback loop thing happens between my raging cock and my watching eyes and all the muscles in my body which seem to be throbbing as a gush of come hits the mirror obscuring my face. While I'm cleaning the come off the mirror, I should probably say a bit about my face. It isn't a matter of bragging. Like sex, good looks are more complicated than your average porn fantasy suggests. When I look in the mirror I just see my face, but I've noticed that when I look at other people, they have a reaction, and eyes tend to stay on me. I see black hair, blue eyes, full lips. Psychologists say beauty is just a culturally specific thing, we like well-balanced features, I don't know. I just know that some people act a bit strange around me. In fact this got me into trouble once when I was younger, but I'll save that story for a little later. As the fever receded in the shower afterwards, I thought about what I was now going to do for my summer. I would have just gone to France myself, except for the embarrassing fact that Cintra had paid for the tickets. Her family is loaded, whereas I just live with my mom and we don't have much, and my own savings were just going to be enough for expenses over there. I probably could have spent my whole summer vacation thinking of new ways to apply Skin Trip to myself, but there was another problem, which was that my mother was taking off with some friends and she had arranged to sublet the apartment. In short: I needed to get out of town, and I needed a summer job. I've always loved being in the water. I've swum competitively through high school. The summer before I had worked on the waterfront staff at Camp Terrapin, an aquatics camp in Northern Ontario. I made a few calls and discovered they had had a staff member drop out and needed a counselor. So a few days before I had expected to be taking off for France, I was bussing my way to a lake in the wilderness. Matthias. I noticed him first on the bus. Most of the kids as you can imagine were pretty into socializing, even the new kids. Matthias obviously was new, sitting by himself, but he seemed content just to stare out the window and daydream. Something about him caught me. He was 14, I found out later, though he looked younger, more like 12. His blonde hair so pale it was almost white. He was leaning against the window, his head leaning on a slender arm, only a bit of his gently freckled face visible. For some reason, I wanted to take a picture of him. It was just a moment. But it's stuck in my mind like a sliver. As counselor, I was responsible for a group of 8 14 year-olds. I guess I wasn't surprised that Matthias was among them. He was the only new kid; which can be hard. And I could see right away that in his case, it was going to be. Part of it for sure was Jeremy. Jeremy was well known to the counselors. If you had Jeremy in your cabin, your main task was going to be figuring out how to tame the beast. He had that inexplicable charisma that some kids have, kids who grow up to be politicians or psychopaths, I guess. Natural-born leaders, you could say, except in Jeremy's case, as with so many, there was a decidedly twisted quality to his leadership. He wasn't disobedient as a camper, he was far too confident in his own power to get what he wanted, and his ability to use his peers to that end. Jeremy had the good looks and handsome wardrobe of a rich preppie, which is what he was. I was surprised to notice on the first day that he had brought with him a digital camcorder, one which, while small, was more on the order of a professional model. But he was a kid with parents who wanted him to have the "best", which invariably meant more than he could use or appreciate. (Which probably has something to do with why he appreciated nothing and wanted to use everyone.) He noticed me looking at it and assured me he had just brought it to tape some of his practices, and that he would keep it put away at other times. Early on, I said something to Jeremy about Matthias - make the new kid comfortable, that kind of thing. He nodded and assured me he would. And indeed it looked like he had taken Matthias under his wing. I didn't think any more about the camcorder until the events of the second night of camp. There was an evening activity going on, and part-way through I realized that half of my campers weren't there: Jeremy, Matthias, and two others, Trent and Shel. Trent and Shel were twins, and Jeremy's most loyal slaves. I decided to head back to the cabin and see if I could find them. I remember pausing as I was about to open the door. For some reason, I felt a kind of dread. I entered as soundlessly as I could. I saw right away that blankets had been hung around two of the bunk beds, cordoning off the area between them. From inside, I could hear Jeremy issuing orders. "Like that. That's right." His words rose out of a bunch of tangled sounds which sounded like...sex. Panting, grunting, slurping, with a few muttered comments. The cabin was dark but there was a light behind the blankets, and I could see silhouettes moving. I moved through the dim cabin quietly. "Yeah, good. Ohhh." That was Shel. "More. Take it." Jeremy. Suddenly, I tripped over someone's trunk, making a loud noise. The response from behind the blankets was immediate. The light went off, whispered commands, rustling of clothes. I quickly turned on the cabin lights and yanked back the blanket. The twins were pulling clothes back on. Jeremy had his video camera in his hands. On the floor was Matthias, stark naked, his pale flesh and skinny swimmer's body looking terribly vulnerable. He turned away from me, covering his genitals with one hand and his face with the other, apparently in shame. "It's okay, Terran," Jeremy quickly assured me, putting away his camcorder. "Just a game. No one hurt, right guys?" Trent and Shel, avoiding eye contact, murmured agreement. As Jeremy started to turn away from me I grabbed the camera. "Hold on a second," I said. "I want the three of you to go outside and wait for me there." Jeremy started to protest - for a moment his polite veneer slipped and I saw something scary in there -- but he quickly realized that any resistance would compound the situation. I shoved the camcorder in its case and slung it over my shoulder while turning my attention to Matthias, kneeling beside him. He was crying. I pulled a blanket over him. "You okay?" I asked. "Get me out of here," he pleaded. There was nothing to do but scoop him up into my arms. Which is how I came to be carrying a naked young Matthias out of the cabin. As we passed the others I ordered them into the cabin and told them they were to stay there until further notice. Trent and Shel looked truly desperate, but they were taking their cue from Jeremy and for the moment he was compliant. I guess it was the good thing I had the blanket over Matthias. It would not have been good for them to see the warmth inside, see how my hands tingled where they touched him, see that I had the hardest hard-on I had ever felt. Somehow my t-shirt had ridden up and I could feel Matthias genitals, pressed against my stomach. "They were making me do things," is all he said. I took him to the infirmary, where he could have his own room for the night. Washed his face off. He didn't want me to leave. Looked up at me through lashes like moth wings. Spontaneously I kissed him on the forehead, and he closed his eyes. I made sure the rest of my campers made it back to the cabin, and after lights out I went to the staff rec room to have a snack. I was feeling confused and disturbed. It's not that I've never felt anything for a boy. I've known I was bisexual since I first heard the word. It's just I'd never felt anything quite like this, period. And I wasn't sure it was a good thing to be feeling. I knew what it felt like to be sexually exploited, for reasons which are bound to come out eventually in this story but which I don't quite feel ready to get into. I had evidently rescued Matthias from a really cruel situation, so why had my own response been a desire to throw him on the ground and ravish him myself? I would have to deal with Jeremy and the twins tomorrow, possible even see that they were sent home. But I guess I wondered how much better I was to feel this way, because now I could only think about one thing: what had been going on behind those blankets? Soon I was alone in the rec room - my introspective mood hadn't made me very interesting company. And there was the camcorder beside me. I was going to have to hand it in to the director in the morning, when I told him the story. It wasn't until my hands were already taking the camcorder out of its case that I actually had the thought that whatever had happened behind those blankets, was recorded on the tape still in the camcorder. I was the counselor. Matthias hadn't been able to tell me what had happened, and I wasn't about to trust Jeremy's version of events. The camera, however, doesn't lie. I pressed rewind, and when the tape got to the beginning, I pressed play. BLISS FEVER CHAPTER TWO: Here's what I saw, sitting along in the rec room and watching the pixel display on that camcorder: Shel, Trent and Matthias sitting there, all clothed. Jeremy holding the camera, giving them directions as, I assume, he glances between the viewscreen and them. (I can tell this from their looks towards him.) All three look a bit nervous. The sound is a bit garbled, and I don't want to play it loud in this space, where someone could walk in any minute, so I can't actually hear what's being said. I can only watch. There is a fumbling nervousness to it all, these are 14 year olds. But Jeremy, evidently a budding pornographer, manages amazingly to keep control. Shel and Trent are nice enough to look at, but it's Matthias your eyes are drawn towards. As he strips his clothes off, with hesitant, heartbreakingly vulnerable looks to the others, the light bounces off his white skin so that it almost burns out in the wide open auto-shutter. His nipples are small reddish brown islands on the white expanse of his slender chest. After some more words from Jeremy, Matthias lifts his ass up to slide off his pants. The camera tilts down to get a good look as Matthias' boxer shorts slide off. His penis is already a man's penis above a boy's testicles, and only a tiny bit of blond pubic hair above. The camera isn't that interested. It sweeps up now and Shel and Trent, lying beside Matthias, have pulled down their pants, and have their hard cocks in hand. Shel and Trent are identical twins: but there is one part of their bodies that are not identical. I'd like to tell you exactly what their cocks looked like, their chests, their nipples, balls...but the truth is it was only Matthias I was really looking at. The three boys have their cocks in hand. It seems it's to be a race to see who can come first - only, Matthias is playing by a different set of rules. While Shel and Trent yank their pricks with a rough kind of indifference, looking nowhere in particular, Matthias caresses himself with long, languid strokes, gazing dreamily at his swollen member as if it were his best friend. In short time, Trent and then Shel spurt their orgasms with a few short grunts. Satisfied, they look at Jeremy for more instructions. Well, Matthias clearly lost, and now come the consequences; he starts orally servicing the twins. At first, everyone seems to be having a good time. Matthias has Trent's hardening cock in his mouth, and clearly it's not the first one he's had there, since he worships it with proficiency. Shel's cock is getting hard as he watches, and soon Matthias is working on both cocks. But Jeremy isn't satisfied with this. On his command, Shel pins Matthias' hands behind his back, and Trent takes control of Matthias' mouth, ramming his now fully erect cock in to its hilt, holding the boy's hair tightly in his hand. Matthias is being orally raped. Suddenly some idiot bumps into a trunk off-screen, the camera pov starts to whip around, and that's it. Sitting there, I know two things. One, Matthias started off as willing a participant in what happened as the others - though why and how a 14 year old boy could be such a proficient cocksucker is a questions which raises the spectre of other moments when he might not have been so willing. Or am I just projecting my own history? Two: I am hornier than I have ever been in my life, if such a thing is possible. I want to push rewind and watch the tape again, but I know if I do I will have my cock out and be jerking off here in the staff lounge, which is not a good idea. Plus, the fact that I am turned on in spite of the cruel direction things took, is a little disturbing. So I stow the camera and head for a shower to clear my head. The hot water felt good. I tried to let it wash away the images in my mind. But that thought brought the images more vividly to mind, and there was no denying that they were turning me on all over again. Two boys cocks. Matthias face. Matthias boxers sliding down, revealing a cock as beautiful as a young bird. Supporting myself against the wall, I reached around my throbbing cock and began to stroke myself. It was pretty late and odds were no one else would come into the shower, but the truth is I was beyond caring. I closed my eyes and saw Matthias naked body as the camera saw it, only in my mind the image kept going, and the twins cocks spurted come in gushing quantities onto Matthias pale face. I gasped as my own come shot out of my body against the wall. A moment later, I stepped out of the shower, and almost had a heart attack. Matthias himself was sitting there staring out me. "What are you doing here," I demanded. "You're supposed to be in the infirmary." "I couldn't sleep," was his simple reply. "And I feel like I need a shower." A little spooked, I shrugged. "Okay, but then to bed right after." He grabbed my hand. "Please don't leave. I don't feel, you know, I don't feel safe alone." He had the longest eyelashes I've ever seen, and I couldn't resist the pleading look. My towel still wrapped around me, I nodded and sat down. "Thank you. I won't be long." Matthias quickly pulled his clothes off. Although he'd been in my hands naked not an hour earlier, I hadn't really had a good look at him in person, and on the tape he had been more ghost than flesh. I couldn't help taking him in with my eyes now. He had a boy's body which has just began to sprout into a man. His skin was pale, a dusting of freckles across his shoulders, just beginning to broaden. His legs as he slid down his pants were hairless, but like his torso, showed that slender muscularity of a dedicated swimmer. As he yanked down his underwear, his penis bobbed up. With just a little blond moustache above, it had the slender hairless contour of a boy's penis, but the size of a man's, made more striking by his small, bare testicles. I took this in at a glance, then looked up to his face, to see him looking back at me. I quickly looked away, and I'm sure flushed, as it seemed not only that he knew I had been checking him out, but he was deliberately displaying himself. He smiled, then turned and headed for the shower. "I hope there's some hot water left." As he moved I quickly realized that his unconcealed prick was erect, and getting harder. In the shower, Matthias luxuriated in the water. He ran his hands over his body, soaping himself up. His attention moved quickly to his genitals. Soaping himself up luxuriously, he put both hands on his cock and began to work it. I couldn't quite believe what I was seeing, and wanted to run away, except that it was the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen. I realized that I was hard again, and I let the towel fall away and leaned back so that my prick could stand free. I had only taken my eyes away from Matthias for a moment but when I looked back I was startled to see him, staring straight back at me. In fact he was facing me completely now, the water shooting against his skinny, hairless body and spraying away, both his hands working his cock; actually, his hands were steady and his slender hips were thrusting sinuously back and forth. It's hard to do justice to the moment. It sounds like a typical pornographic fantasy. Except there was nothing pornographic about his face. Matthias face had a simple look of pure happiness. He seemed to be saying, "here I am. This is the body I have been given, and I love it. I offer it to your eyes with that love." Without taking my eyes off his, I brought my hands onto my cock and began to work it. Joined at the eyes, I couldn't tell whose hands were roaming over whose body any more. I saw myself in the shower, with him, the water hitting us both. He puts his hands on my shoulders and pushes me down. He turns his body slightly to let the water wash the soap off him. My mouth hungrily mauls his chest, biting onto his small nipples, hard as buttons, as one of my strong hands takes him from the front, cupping under his balls and lifting against the shaft of his prick, the other reaching behind, my finger sliding between the hairless cheeks of his ass and gently into his anus. As I drop down all the way to my knees, my hand guides his prick into my mouth. I swallow his boycock whole, it seems so large for the size of his body yet I could fit it whole into my mouth. It is electric, like a living thing unto itself, a whole universe filling my mouth and I want to keep it there. Matthias moans and began to thrust, for I am too overwhelmed by the sensation of it, the silken layer of skin over throbbing muscle to make any movement at all. But as his cock slides in and out of my mouth, my lips map its contours, my tongue pressing along the underside and swirling around it, and my head begins to work with his movement. As his hips press towards me and my mouth presses down to the root of his shaft, my lip was tickled by the down blond hair on his pubes, the only hair anywhere on his body beside his head. My hand in front is wrapped gently around his balls and his thrusting hips have somehow worked my finger up inside him. I feel, although my mouth is surrounding a billion of his nerve ends, like my senses are somewhere inside him, a salty sweet place in which tongue and saliva and semen and cock and ass and fingers and sweat are all one. He groans, and I feel his hands holding onto my head, as he fucks my mouth, his thighs tensing with every thrust, his anus squeezing my finger, every part of him it seems throbbing. "Oh, oh, oh, Terran," Matthias gasps, and I feel a hot spurt of boy come pumping itself into me, streaming down my throat in a thick gob. Suddenly his knees wobble and give, and I hold him with my hands, and my mouth, refusing yet to release his boyhood. I lower him down onto the floor of the shower, allowing my finger to slide out of the asshole that had closed around it like a lover, the water still cascading over us. Matthias sprawls back, his arms flopping over his head, almost exactly as I had discovered him in the cabin. I feel the incredibly electrical energy that has been zapping out of his cock recede in waves, moving back into his body, and reluctantly and oh so slowly, caressing his balls between my fingers, I allow his cock, now so much smaller, to slide out of my mouth. I lean back on my haunches and look at what lies before me, resting my hands on Matthias' thighs. A freckled blond boy, his slender arms thrown over his eyes. I run my hands over his body, astonished by his perfection. My own cock looks, before him, like a satyr's cock, not just a man's cock above this boy's body, but a raging, hungry monster, fully half the size of his whole body (well, it looks that way, I don't really claim such extraordinary proportions!). Maybe it was my lust that is so magnified. If I could tear my cock off my body and ravish Matthias with it, ravish myself with it, I would have. Indeed it is standing up so hard it seems to want to crawl right inside my own body. Around this hungry beast a slender boy's hand wraps itself. Matthias eyes are still closed but he obviously isn't asleep. His hand touches me delicately, experimentally. The fingers prod along my shaft and caress my balls. The touch is feather light, maddeningly so. I put my hand around his and began to use it to jerk myself off with the force I need. His other hand reaches up and tickles my balls. He is half sitting up now, and smiling, I look down at him and see his little prick is getting hard again, again growing from something the size of my index finger to more than twice that size. I tilt myself forward and press my cock right against his, and pressing against him began to thrust against it. It would be more accurate to say my cock is doing the thrusting, not I, I am being dragged gloriously along behind it. The two cocks want to go their own directions, like seals slipping over one another, and it is his hands that keep them from parting, while my hands hold against his hips. He lies there and receives my thrusts, groaning with each stroke. Each time my cock slides slowly against his I feel a whole landscape traversed, head against shaft, head against head, shaft against shaft, shaft against head, and feel a churning volcano at the base of my body and his, a single volcano which needs both our bodies and which we are bringing to the point of eruption. I suddenly tilt forward, supporting myself with my hands, and drop my face to his. As our lips and tongues join, I accelerate my thrusting. Our cocks now throb against one another with a single beat as the rhythm of their movement accelerates. I feel myself fall inside his mouth and, then the volcano explodes, molten come gushing out of to cover his stomach, while below me I also feel him tremble feel his balls squeeze up and his cock jerk as it too erupts. Then I blink and I am back where I had been all along, sitting on the bench, watching him shower, our eyes locked, as, looking at one another, we both came. Matthias, still standing alone in the shower, let out a little moan as he ejaculated, and when he looked at me it was like a deer in the headlights. Without saying anything he grabbed his towel and fled the bathroom.