Date: Sun, 25 May 2008 20:10:57 -0700 (PDT)
From: Tom Borden <tombor99@yahoo.com>
Subject: "Church of the Holy Seed"  Chapter 12

A note to readers: This story was intended originally to be only one
installment.  But I've continued it because of the great response I've
received, along with many requests to add additional chapters.  Unlike my
other stories on the Nifty Archive, "Holy Seed" is very much a flight of
fancy that barely skims the edges of reality.  It's meant to amuse,
entertain and, hopefully, aid and abet the sexual arousal of the readers to
some extent.  All long running stories eventually run their course and need
to end.  Moving a story forward with new and exciting episodes becomes
harder and harder to do.  Therefore, if readers have suggestions as to
additional plot twists and characters, I'd be glad to consider them.  They
must not be, however, "the same old thing."  Too much redundancy and
repetition eventually becomes boring.  Thanks to all of you readers who
have written me over the last several years with such great and encouraging
comments.  While writing the story provides a vicarious sexual experience
for me, I'm glad it does the same for others.


The Church of the Holy Seed

Chapter 12


Before Rob and I parted, we learned that our homes were only about a
twenty-minute drive apart.  I lived in the city proper, and his home was in
one of its suburbs.  Since his wife had little interest in sex with him,
and my wife had absolutely no interest in sex, we agreed we would find ways
to get together frequently.

It was late afternoon on Father's Day when I returned home.  My wife had
left for a month's visit with her mother about four hundred miles away.
Ricky was alone and met me at the door.  He suggested we sit out on the
pool deck and have beer and grocery store pizza, which he would put in the
oven when we were ready.  When I take a trip, I always bring back a present
for Ricky.  As we sat on the patio, he opened it.  It was a DVD of a
particularly exciting orgy among Catholic priests and young seminarians.
It had been recommended to me by Father Dick.

When we finished our pizza, Ricky gave me my Father's Day gift.  It was a
humongous two-headed vibrating dildo.  The penis heads were fully twice the
size of those on normal penises.  The shaft was approximately a foot long.

"Dad, I hope we can try this out tonight.  With this thing, we can fuck
each other at the same time."

"Where did you get it," I asked.  "You're not old enough to go into one of
those dirty book stores."

"I saw an ad on the Internet, and I asked Father Timothy if he could find
one for me to give you."

I was really excited to try it out, and took Ricky in my arms.  God, how I
loved my boy.  Even with all the hot fun I've had with other guys, it was
always Ricky I loved the most.

"Dad, tell me about any stuff you did at your meeting.  You always manage
to get in a lot of good sucking and fucking when you go off to your
meetings like that."

"Actually, Ricky, I saw some really hot looking guys there at the hotel.
There was one guy I really wanted to fuck his face.  Somehow, though, we
didn't connect.  But I did get together with the pilot of the plane I took
up there.  His name is Rob and he was so different from other guys I fuck
around with.  He's married, and he's got the same problem with his wife as
I've had with your mother.  She doesn't give him the amount of fucking he
wants.  Of course, I haven't fucked your mother since you were born.  And I
don't care anymore.  But he's still wanting to fuck his wife.  I think he's
starting to be a little like me a while back.  I think he's finding that
the emotional connection with males is bringing a satisfaction even greater
than he experienced with his wife.  So he's sort of in a middle ground now,
thinking he wants to fuck his wife, but at the same time finding that
fucking and sucking guys might be what he really wants.  There's a little
bit of a conflict going on there.  Kind of like what I went through before
I joined the Church of thee Holy Seed.  Now there's no doubt in my mind
what I want . . . and what I need."

"Dad, I don't know anything about fucking women, but Father Timothy told me
once that women are always more concerned about what they want, and not
really about what men want.  They really don't know what men really want.
Most of them never figure it out.  He said that two men together know what
each other wants.  And that makes everything so much better."

"You're right, Ricky.  Take it from me, you're right.  All the men I've met
at church feel the same way now.  In the end, we've found we can get so
much more sexual satisfaction with a man than we ever could with our wives
or other women.  Somehow, we understand each other, while a woman can never
fully understand the emotional and sexual needs of a man."

Ricky sat down on the patio between my legs and laid his head on my bulge.
The harder he pressed his head, the harder I got.  He unzipped me so my
cock could spring free.  He reached in and cupped his hand around my balls
as he slipped his sweet lips down over my shaft.  I ran my fingers through
his dark curly hair as I looked off to the west at a beautiful sunset.  As
I felt my orgasm building in my gut, I thought life is good.

After dark, we went inside and sat naked on the sofa while we watched
Ricky's new DVD.  It was truly one of the hottest videos I'd ever seen.
One can never be sure these were real priests and seminarians or just
actors.  But the effect was real since it was obviously filmed on the altar
of a real church.  The video started out with the priests slowly stripping
the young seminarians, one piece of clothing at a time, as they ran their
tongues and hands over their naked skin.  Then the naked seminarians slowly
stripped off the robes of the priests.  Following that came an orgy of
sucking and fucking and cum showers like I'd never seen.  In a way, it put
to shame our confirmation ceremonies on the altar of the Church of the Holy
Seed.  Ricky decided to take the DVD to Father John, and perhaps it would
inspire him to ratchet up own ceremonies to a higher level.

When the video was over, Ricky and I went to bed with our new two-headed
vibrating dildo.  We laid on our backs with our legs up and our asses a few
inches apart.  We each took one end of the dildo and pushed into our
asshole.  Because it was so large, we both had some trouble getting them
pushed past the rims of our assholes.  We both managed, though.  I'd never
felt so full of cock in my life.  But it pressed so hard on our prostates
that the feeling was like no other we'd ever experienced.  We had a little
difficulty moving our hips, but as our sphincter muscles relaxed more and
more, my ass cheeks were soon pressing against Ricky's and we had the full
length of the dildo inside of us.  The vibration of the dildo brought us
both to orgasm quickly.  Rarely had I cum without touching my cock.  The
vibration against the prostate is what did it.

I told Ricky about the sham marriage counseling we did for Hank and Betty
Cockstone, and that we might expect Hank to come to our house for a regular
injection of our sperm.  But over the next week, I didn't hear from him.  I
did, however, hear from my airline pilot friend, Rob.  He wouldn't be
flying again for about five days and was now at home.  He'd just arrived,
and was rather hoping his wife would welcome him home with a good fuck.
But she had other plans with some activity or other and went out.  He was
sitting there naked as he always did when he was alone.  He told me he
wanted me to see him again naked and would like to come over if it was all
right.  I told him to come right over.

In about twenty minutes he was at the door.  After I took him in my arms
and we kissed, I introduced him to Ricky.  Both Ricky and I greeted Rob
dressed only in our jockey shorts.  I invited him upstairs to our bedroom,
where he quickly removed his clothes and lay spread-eagle on the bed, his
arms splayed high above his head and his legs spread wide apart.  I hadn't
forgotten the eroticism I'd felt when I first saw his naked body in his
hotel room.  Ricky and I both slipped out of our underwear and lay down
beside him.  As we both began to run our hands over his body, Rob closed
his eyes and moaned like a thirsty man who had just been given a tall glass
of water.

As I lowered my head and ran my tongue and lips over his stomach and
thighs, he didn't move and continued to moan quietly.

I said, "You like this, don't you?"

"Oh, yes," he said in almost a whisper.  "I want you to take my body and do
anything you want with it.  Anything, Roger.  My body is yours.  I want you
to love me in every way you wish.  In every way you possibly can.  Whatever
you want to do with me.  I need you to use my body in every way that will
give you pleasure.  Please.  I crave to give myself totally to you."

I looked into Rob's face and could see the longing in his eyes.  I wondered
if anyone had ever given him all he wanted and needed, and if anyone really
loved him.  I was sure his wife loved him, but perhaps she took his love
for granted and had no understanding of the special kind of sexual
attention he needed and yearned for.  It was as though he was now ready to
give himself and his body up for the pleasure of anyone who would have him,
especially another man.  He made no mention of wanting to go out and find
another woman to fuck.

Take me, take me, he said.  Oh my God, how I came to love him during our
first meeting.  I would take him and give him anything he needs and yearns
for.  I looked at him, and knew he was mine to love, and I would love him
in every way I could.  But as I continued to look into his eyes and his
body stretched out before me, his legs spread wide and his arms splayed up
over his head, I wondered if it wasn't really love he was after.  The kind
of love that Ricky and I had.  It was more of a craving he had to be
observed as his body was used for the sexual pleasure of others, and thus
giving him the sexual excitement he needed.

Ricky had also been gently caressing Rob's body, but soon got up.  "I have
to go to the bathroom, Dad.  I'll be back in a minute."

Rob looked at me and said, "He's your son?  I've never been with a boy."

"It's all right, Rob.  He can make you happy.  Trust me."

Ricky returned and lay his head between Rob's legs.  He licked Rob's ball
sack and pulled on the delicate loose skin between his tight lips.  He ran
his tongue up over the gorge blood vessel along the underside of Rob's
steel hard penis.  He lifted Rob's legs high in the air, exposing this
handsome pilot's beautiful brownish red asshole.  I could see the rim of
that asshole pulsating and pushing outward as though it were begging for my
son's tongue to enter.

Rob closed his eyes and let out a long sigh as though he were surrendering
to anybody and to anywhere fate would take him.  I don't think I had ever
experienced as hot a rush of adrenaline through my body as I did at that
moment while taking in the sight of this gorgeous body that had been
literally turned over to us for our pleasure.  Not only could I not take my
eyes off of his extraordinary body, but I craved to breath in the smell of
his body and to taste the moistness of his skin.  His legs, his arms, his
torso, and to have my face buried in the dark warm depths of his crotch.  I
longed to take his cock down into my throat and let his hot, thick cum rush
across my tongue and down my gullet.  I yearned for him to fill my bowels
with his seed.

I felt an insanity come over me as I threw my body on his and satisfied my
longings with my tongue and lips all over his muscled body.  As I had done
in the hotel, I held his arms down over his head as I plunged my burning
hot cock up his waiting asshole.  As I pounded him, Ricky stood over his
head and lowered his sweet teenage ass over Rob's face.  Watching Rob's
tongue lashing over Ricky's balls and asshole brought me suddenly to
orgasm.  I felt surge after surge of my cum shooting into Rob's rectum as
the rim of his asshole snapped at my throbbing cock.  Just then, Rob's cock
began to bounce, and heavy streams of his own cum shot out onto Ricky's
stomach, and then oozing down over Ricky's cock and balls and onto Rob's
face.

My orgasm seemed to go on, clutching at my gut far longer than I ever
remembered it.

Ricky then got up and knelt beside Rob.  He jacked his own cock off and let
volley after volley of his young thick cum splatter all over Rob's face, as
I continued to hold his arms tightly against the bed.  Rob lay there in
total abandonment, as though he had completely succumbed and yielded to a
power greater than himself.  Here was a man, I thought, who craved sex with
his wife, but had just had an intensely erotic experience that he could
never have with her or any other woman.

As I lay collapsed on his body, with all three of us still gasping for air,
I thought about the times when I had fucked my own wife.  She had given me
nothing but her cunt.  To her, I was merely a mechanical man with a cock
that massaged her clit to orgasm.  To her, my own orgasm was utterly
immaterial.  She had little idea of the sexual frenzy that a man yearns
for, such as that we three had just experienced together.

I wanted to talk more with Rob, this gorgeously handsome airline pilot, now
lying naked and covered with our cum.  I invited them to come downstairs
and I would get us something to drink.  Before we let Rob up, Ricky and I
cleaned all the cum off of his body with our tongues.  I mused as to
whether or not all airline pilots' cum was as rich and sweet.

We sat in the living room, all three of us naked.  Rob talked more about
his need for sex and his desires and frustrations.  I could tell it was
something that nagged at him, something he needed to talk about to others
who understood.  Unlike any other man I'd been with, Rob talked openly and
freely about the sexual conflicts and longings he was dealing with.  His
willingness to have me know of all his secret passions caused me to open up
also.  At last I had someone, also, to whom I could reveal my own secret
feelings of conflict and need.

We talked for a long time as we exposed our innermost feelings to each
other.  I began to look at Rob as a friend like no one else I'd ever known.
I felt so close to him, as though we were meant for each other.  We were
more than brothers.  We were soul-mates.  No, it was as though we shared
one soul, as though we were one person.

After a long while, I said, "Rob, do you ever turn to religion?  Do you
belong to a church?"

"No.  Not really.  I've never been particularly religious."

"Ricky and I belong to a church that has helped us a great deal with our
sexual needs.  It's called the Church of the Holy Seed.  We worship sperm,
the sacred fluid given to us by God."

"Sperm?" Rob asked.  "What do you mean?"

"As I say, we worship it.  The act of taking the holy sperm into our
bodies, as well as giving it to others is a way of praising God for his
wonderful gifts."

"Huh?"  It was all Rob could think to say.

"All the men and boys who belong to the church exchange their sperm with
one another and with the priests of the church.  All the dads and their
sons go through a beautiful confirmation ceremony where they put their
sperm into one another's bodies."

Rob's eyes began to widen, and I could see his prick hardening.

"I'm not sure I understand," Rob said.

"Well, Rob, let me put it into layman's terms.  In order to share our sperm
with one another, we do it by fucking and sucking each other.  And it's a
special tribute to God when we give each other cum baths.  And God rewards
us with intensely sacred orgasms."

"Oh, my God," Rob said, as the head of his cock seemed to swell and become
red.

"I think you'd enjoy becoming a member of our church.  You'd find it is the
ultimate way to praise God and achieve the highest level of sexual
satisfaction.  Why don't we go over and talk to Father John, who is the
rector of the church.  And you can meet some of the priests, also.  They're
all very understanding and eager to assist any parishioner during his time
of need.  Would you like to do that?"

"Fuck yes," Rob said.  "When can we go?"

"How about tomorrow afternoon?  By the way, the church also offers marriage
counseling, if you think that would help you."

"Marriage counseling?  Aw, shit.  My wife wouldn't have anything to do with
that.  She doesn't think anything's wrong with our marriage, so long as I
always do what she says.  I'm afraid she's the dominant one in that
marriage, and it's always what she says that goes.  When she's not ready to
fuck, we don't fuck.  And when I'm ready to fuck, we still don't fuck.
We're together a lot and we enjoy being out on the golf course together.
But when we come home, I'm ready for a good hot fuck.  But it doesn't
happen."

Ricky shook his head.  "Dad, don't you think you should tell Rob the truth?
You know.  About what that church really is."

"You're right, Ricky," I said.  "Rob, that church is really a sham.  We
worship cum, alright, but not for the love of God.  It's really just a cum
factory for all of us who like to fuck and suck and eat cum.  It's a place,
Rob, where you can satisfy all your wildest sex dreams."

Rob's face brightened.  "Wow.  Really?  I'm ready for that."

"Okay, tomorrow afternoon it is," I said as I ran my hand over the soft
hair on Rob's thigh.  "But first, that luscious hard piece of meat of yours
looks like it's calling out to be sucked.  I think I'm in need of some of
your holy sperm in my stomach."

Rob eagerly lay back with his body stretched out on the sofa.  I knelt on
the floor and ran my tongue over the full length of his hard rod.  As I
sucked, he and Ricky kissed deeply, each slashing his tongue through the
other's mouth.  Ricky's full lips were particularly soft, and I hoped Rod
enjoyed kissing them.  Rod ran his hands over the soft skin of Ricky's thin
arms, and then pinched the boy's nipples.  I had the feeling that Rod had
not done much touching like this of another male's body, but it seemed he
was enjoying it.  He loved his own body and wanted others to enjoy it.  But
he seemed a little reluctant to sample the beauty of other men's bodies.

As I sucked the full length of Rod's hard penis into my throat, I ran my
hands over the soft hair on his legs.  I loved to feel the shape of them in
my hands.  So erotic.  I wished sometime he'd do the same for me.

Suddenly Rod began bucking his hips and thrusting hard into my mouth.  And
then came the copious flow of his hot, thick cum, filling my mouth and
throat.  When it was over, I held his slightly wilting penis between my
lips for a while.  I knew the priests of the Church of the Holy Seed were
going to love this.


When we arrived at the church the next afternoon, we found a young man with
his pants down and leaning over as he stood next to the receptionist.  The
receptionist had his face buried in between the young man's ass cheeks.  He
pulled his face out when he heard us come in.

"Hi, Mr. Thompson.  Father Bruce just filled up his ass with a nice load of
cum.  I love Father Bruce's cum, and I'm just sucking out as much as I can.
It's so good."

"Go ahead," I said.  "Get it all.  We'll wait."

I looked down at Rod's crotch and, sure enough, he had a huge bulge as he
observed what was happening.  The receptionist finally finished, and the
young man pulled up his pants and left.  The receptionist's face was wet,
and he licked his lips.

"What can I do for you, Mr. Thompson?"

"We'd like to see Father John.  My friend, here, would like to talk to him
about joining the church."

"He's alone in his office at the moment, so just go on in."

We walked through the sanctuary to get to Father John's office.  Rod
stopped and stared at the enormous cock and balls sculpture on the wall
behind the altar.  As we got closer, we noticed at one side of the altar, a
priest was energetically fucking a young boy as his father stood nearby
jacking off onto his son's face.

"The priests at this church," I said, "are always ready, you see, to assist
any of the parishioners in their time of need."

As we passed the confessional, at the door of which was a small line of men
and boys waiting, we heard a loud groan coming from within and someone
growling, "Aw, Fuck!"  I explained to Rod that that was merely some man who
was doing penitence for his sins.

Rod and I entered Father John's chamber and found him lying naked on his
side on his couch.  He was jacking off.  Sticking out of his ass was just
the very end of a huge black dildo.

When he saw us, he said, "Hurry over here, Roger.  I'm about to blast off.
Please take my holy sperm."

I rushed over and knelt beside him.  I took his cock in my mouth just in
time to receive a flood of the holy father's sacred cream.

"Oh, that was wonderful, Roger," Father John gasped as he pulled out the
dildo and sat up.  "I'm glad you appeared when you did.  I hate to see my
holy seed wasted."  He looked at Rob.  "And who is this handsome young
man?"

Rob laughed and said, "I'm not young.  I'm fifty-seven."

"A perfect age.  What can I do for you, Roger?"

"This is Rob, Father John.  I wanted to bring him around so you could talk
to him about membership in the church.  I think he has special needs that
would be greatly satisfied by the worship of sperm."

"How delightful to meet you, Rob," Father John said.  "Please sit down here
next to me and we'll talk."

Father John, still naked, lifted the dildo to his nose.  "Ah, lovely.  I
can still smell Father Dick's cum up there from earlier this morning."

Father John put the dildo in his mouth and sucked on it for a few moments.
Then he put his hand on Rob's thigh and explained how the worship of sperm
worked.  How the men and boys of the church ingested the sperm of others
through both their assholes and their mouths, after which they could feel
the grace of God surging through them.  Rob looked intensely interested.

"If you would like to join the church, you would need to go through a
confirmation ceremony in the presence of the Bishop.  Do you have any
sons?"

"Yes," Rob replied.  "I have one adult son."

"Do you think he might be interested in becoming a member also?  We find it
very important that fathers and sons give each other their sperm."

"I will tell you frankly, Father John, that my son would sooner disown me
than do what you suggested.  In fact, he would do more than disown me if he
knew I was involved in such a church."

"Oh, I'm sorry to hear that," Father John said as he moved his hand up over
Rod's considerable bulge.  "Now as a preliminary to accepting you for
confirmation, it is customary that I make certain determinations.  We do
have our standards."

"I quite understand," Rob said.

"Now if you will stand and drop your pants.  I need to inspect your cock
and bal . . . I mean your penis and testicles.  They must be in good shape
in order to produce the amount of sperm we require in our worship
ceremonies."

Rod eagerly got out of his pants, as well as his shirt, and stood there
completely naked.  "I hope you don't mind, Father John.  I love to be
naked."

"I don't mind at all, my son."  Father John's eyes swept over Rod's
beautiful body as his own cock sprang to full bloom.  He gently cupped
Rod's lovely ball sack in one hand as he wrapped his fingers around Rod's
throbbing penis.

Father John began to purr.  "Mmmm.  Lovely.  I shall now take your sperm
into my body as our first preliminary step in determining your
qualification for membership."

Father John slipped his lips gently over the head of Ron's penis and then
brought the whole length of it into his throat.  Rob closed his eyes and
appeared to be drifting into a state of absolute euphoria.  For the first
time in my life, I felt a slight surge of jealousy.  I had the oddest
feeling that Rob was mine.  He was my property.  He was part of me.  What
right did anyone else have to his body?  But I quickly realized Rob was a
man who needed more.  All the wonderful things the priests in this church
could give him would be his.  He'd told me earlier that as long as he was
married, he belonged to no one.

As Father Johns head busily bobbed up and down on Rob's gorged penis,
Father Bruce and Father Dick entered the office.  They had several
magazines in their hands.

"I'm sorry to interrupt you," Father Bruce said.  "But Father Dick and I
were just in the library selecting some suitable instructional material for
our Junior Worship class on Friday night.  And we wanted you to approved
them."

"Junior Worship?" I asked.

"Yes, it's only for the twelve to fourteen age group.  We instruct them on
the importance of sperm in a Godly life, as well as the various methods of
producing sperm and the ways of sharing it with others."

"Remarkable," I said.

Father Bruce stepped close to Rob and looked down at him.  "I don't believe
I've seen this beautiful creature before.  It looks like you're giving him
the preliminaries to membership, Father John."

Father John nodded as he continued to suck.

Fathers Bruce and Dick and I stood around close as we watched Rob's
sensuous body begin to writhe as though he'd abandoned himself completely
to the pleasure he was receiving.  Father Dick reached down and ran his
hand over Rob's beautiful thigh.  Rod opened his eyes slightly, and then
smiled as though having us look at his naked body was an added sexual
thrill to him.  I was learning more and more about what Rob was really
after----what he really craved.

Suddenly Rob bucked his hips and arched his back.  I could tell his orgasm
had hit him hard, and I could only imagine the great gusher of cum flooding
Father John's mouth, so much, in fact, that it was running out of his mouth
and down his chin.  Soon Rob collapsed flat on the couch, looking as out of
it as though he'd been hit by a baseball bat.

Father John stood and looked down at Rob as he licked his lips.  "He is
going to make a wonderful member of our church.  One of the best."

Remembering Ricky's and my encounter with Rob at our house, I knew that Rob
wanted more.  "Father John, I think we should perform one other
preliminary.  I think we should try him out on the Cum-Bath test."

"Oh, but that doesn't come until the actual confirmation ceremony," Father
John said.

"I know," I said, "but I think it's important that we find out now whether
or not it is something he can take well."

"I agree," Father Bruce and Father Dick said in unison."

Father John agreed, and the four of us gathered our naked bodies around
Rob's head.  We began stroking with our cocks pointed at his face.  Rod
looked up at us with a sort of pleading look in his eyes.  He knew what was
about to happen, and I think I actually saw some tears of joy fill his
eyes.  I love a man who is not afraid of tears.

Rob reached up and cupped Father Bruce's low-hanging ball sack in his hand.
With the other hand, he cupped Father Dick's balls.  His face was wreathed
in expectancy, waiting for the flood of cum to swamp his face.

We stroked our cocks hard and fast and, as Father Dick leaned closer, the
sweat beads on his forehead splattered on Rob's face.  I knew that every
one of we four were overwhelmed as we looked down at Rob's intensely carnal
body.  Our lascivious and wanton thoughts played on our most lecherous and
animalistic nature.  The lascivious looks on our faces left no doubt we
were bent on drowning this man with our hot cum.  And we could tell from
the lust in his eyes, he wanted it and needed it passionately.

Father Bruce was the first to growl loudly, signaling that his cum was
about to stream out of his cock onto Rob's face.  As the first volley hit
Rob's cheek, my orgasm took hold of me and I let go of shot after shot of
cum, landing on Rob's mouth and nose.  This was followed by a flood of
sperm flying through the air out of Father Dick's and Father John's cocks.

Rob's face was completely obliterated by thick white cum.  He opened his
mouth and licked his tongue out as far as he could and took some of the cum
into his mouth.  He lay there as though he'd been transported to another
world, oblivious of everything else around him.  He had his eyes closed and
rocked his head slightly from side to side as though he were floating on
air.

I could tell Rob wanted this ethereal moment never to end.  He rose one
hand and slowly smeared the cum around on his face and into his mouth.  He
soon raised both hands in the air toward us, as though he were weakly
begging for more.  As I looked down at this dear, beautiful man, I was
beginning to understand him more and more.  To understand the sexual
domination he craved.  It wasn't a masochistic treatment he wanted.  What
he craved was for others to use his body for their sexual pleasure.

I looked at Rob and noticed that he had gone to sleep.  His mouth was
slightly open and cum from his cheeks was running into it.  I leaned over
and licked the area around his mouth clean.  I didn't want all that cum to
run into his throat and choke him while he slept.

The four of us went and sat in chairs around Father John's desk.  I
explained to the others about Rob's needs and his cravings as I saw them.

Father Bruce couldn't resist.  He got up and walked over to Rob and knelt
down.  With his tongue, he licked the soft skin on Rob's scrotum and took
the soft penis into his mouth.

As Father Bruce ran his hands gently over Rob's sensuous legs, he said,
"Now that I know what he wants, let me be in charge of his confirmation
ceremony.  I think he should have a special ceremony with no one else being
confirmed.  I will devise a ceremony he will never forget.  And it will be
before a full house of parishioners."  Father Bruce stood up and looked
down at Rob.  "This man is going to be mine.  He will think he's died and
gone to Heaven when I'm through with him."


Several days later, Rob and I met at a local coffee shop for breakfast.  He
would be on another flight that night.

"Thank you, Roger, for being my friend.  I have no secrets from you.  I'm
so frustrated at home, I've needed someone like you to share all my
feelings with.  I'm glad you like me and like looking at my body."

"Well, Rob, looking at your body and admiring it and caressing it is one of
the most erotically exciting things I can remember ever doing.  I'll bet
you were the darling of your family when you were growing up."

Rob gave a silent chuckle and waved his hand in front of his face.  "Well,
Roger, I think you'd lose the bet.  My mother never recognized me as
anything special, no matter how I tried to please her.  She was not a very
nice woman.  And my father, who was nice enough, spent most of his time
being subservient to her and obedient to her whims.  I just kind of grew up
on my own.  Kind of like a nobody in a way."

I wanted to talk to Rob about that, but I wasn't sure if it was my place to
say anything or make any judgments.  But we'd talked openly with each other
since we met, and I prayed he wouldn't think me out of order.

"Rob," I said, "as I've told you before, I was once a practicing
psychiatrist before I left for other endeavors.  Would you mind if I made a
professional observation?  I may be very wrong, but I hope you will at
least think about what I have to say."

"You know you can say anything, Roger.  Anything at all."

"Rob . . . we all crave validation.  But it seems to me you've received
very little if any validation from your parents, and you've been unable to
internalize validation completely on your own."

Rob looked hard into my eyes and the smile left his face.  "Is that what
you think?  You think I'm some kind of nut case?"

"Of course not.  I think nothing of the sort, Rob.  I know you've achieved
a great deal in your life.  You're a college graduate, you've achieved high
military rank in the Air Force, you were a fine jet fighter pilot and a
test pilot, and you went on to be a captain with one of the world's great
airlines.  At home, you've done such things as working hard to improve your
golf game so you can be a threat on the course, you've taken up painting
and are proud that others admire your artistic work."

I could tell I was upsetting Rob, and he was confused at what I was getting
at.

"Rob, what I'm saying is that you've worked hard all these years to bring
validation to yourself, to prove your self-worth."

"That's silly."

"Rob, wanting to be naked whenever you can, even when you are alone, and
offering your naked body for other men to see and use is a manifestation of
your desire for validation."

Seeing the look on Rob's face, I knew I was ruining everything.  I knew I
had no right to say these things.

Rob looked as though he was going to rise from his chair.  "Is this the
kind of stuff you shrinks tell your crazy patients?  How can you say I have
poor self-esteem?  Is this what you've thought of me all along?

"I did not say you had poor self-esteem.  Those are your words."

"But that's what you think," Rob said.  "Saying I desire validation is just
another way of saying I've got self-esteem problems."  You think I'm some
pitiful neurotic?  Some pathetic paranoid?"

"I didn't say that and I didn't mean that.  Sit down, Rob.  Please sit
down.  I'm just trying to help you understand yourself."  Again, I wished I
hadn't said that.

"By telling me all those things, that's suppose to help me understand what
a nut I am?"

"I just want you to think about it.  I'm sorry if I upset you.  I guess I
had no right to give you my opinion."

"You have a right to say anything you want, Roger.  But it doesn't apply to
me."


We parted very shortly after that.  He would be flying the next three days
and would be back in town on the weekend.  I went home and told Ricky what
I had done.  Being the wise teenager he was, he agreed that there was no
purpose in my giving Rob my psychiatric opinions about his life.  He'd not
asked for my opinions or my help, and I was presumptuous to think he would
accept it.

Ricky and I had no sex for the next three nights.  We just slept in each
other's arms.  I was convinced I'd destroyed the most wonderful friendship
I'd ever had because of my fucking, no-it-all remarks.  What kind of ego I
must have, I thought, that I would be so reckless.

On the day Rob was to return to town, I didn't hear from him.  That night,
I finally went to bed around midnight.

I was suddenly awakened by something.  It was my cell phone.  I looked at
the clock.  It was a little after 2:30 a.m.

"Hello."

"Roger, it's Rob."

"Oh, Rob.  Where are you?"

"I just got home.  The wife is asleep.  I have to see you."

"Well, sure, Rob.  How about meeting for lunch later?"

"No.  I mean now.  Can I come over now?"

"Of course you can, Rob.  Rob?  I'm sorry about everything.  I didn't mean
. . . ."

"No, Roger.  It's all right.  I've missed you.  And . . . I love you."

When I signed off, I let my head drop back on the pillow and I stared into
the darkness above me.  It was the first time Rob had spoken the words, "I
love you."  I knew he loved his wife, and I wondered how hard it was for
him to say those words to me---another man.

I jumped up and quietly put on a robe over my naked body.  I didn't want to
wake Ricky.  I went downstairs and put on some lights, as well as the porch
light.  I stood out on the porch waiting for his car to drive up.  It
wasn't long before I saw his headlights coming around the corner and his
car pulling up into the driveway.  He was still in his captain's uniform.
As he came up the steps toward me, I could see in the porch light his eyes
were red and watery.  We wrapped our arms around each other, with our
cheeks pressed together.  We said nothing as we walked inside and up the
stairs.


My thanks again to all who have written me in response to this ongoing
story.  This chapter is based very loosely on an experience of my own and
is thus dedicated to a very special person.

Tom Borden
tombor99@yahoo.com