Date: Fri, 30 Jun 2006 09:09:30 +0200
From: A.K. <andrej@andrejkoymasky.com>
Subject: Fabrizio's First "No!" - 1/8 (Adult Youth)

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FABRIZIO'S FIRST "NO!"
by Andrej Koymasky (C) 2006
Written on December 15, 1994
translated by the author
English text kindly revised
by Brian Zimbabwe

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USUAL DISCLAIMER

"FABRIZIO'S FIRST "NO!" " is a gay story, with some parts containing
graphic scenes of sex between males. So, if in your land, religion,
family, opinion and so on this is not good for you, it will be better
not to read this story. But if you really want, or because YOU don't
care, or because you think you really want to read it, please be my
welcomed guest.

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CHAPTER ONE

This is Fabrizio Serra's story, born in San Benigno Canavese on
September 13, 1960, son of Tommaso, druggist, and Natalina Ferrero,
regular primary state schoolteacher. Natalina was a passionate reader
and, as she loved the "Parma Charterhouse" book, when her first and only
child was born, she choose his name taking it from the character of
Fabrizio del Dongo.

Natalina was widowed when Fabrizio was four-years-old. She sold the
pharmacy and moved to Turin with her son where she got a teaching post.
She went to live in a downtown flat, at 24, Principe Amedeo Street,
second floor. When she was going to teach, she took Fabrizio to the
nursery and went to fetch him when she ended her lessons, regularly,
each day. She fixed lunch, they ate and, while the child was playing,
she revised her pupils' homework and prepared lessons for the following
day.

Fabrizio was a pretty child but, above all, he was good and obedient -
he always did anything his mother told him, without any problem, and his
mother was very proud of him. Also the nursery teachers, praised
Fabrizio for his sweet, docile character - he was the child that gave
them the least problems.

This doesn't mean that the child was a colourless baby, the kind who
stays where you put him - no, he liked playing, amusing himself, he was
always merry, ready for laughter; but he never quarreled with the other
children - if one took his toy, he let him do so without protesting; if
another proposed playing a game, he accepted without hesitation; if
someone asked him to do something, he willingly complied. He seemed to
be happy in making others happy.

This side of his character didn't change with the passing of years,
rather, seemed to strengthen and so, when he started to attend primary
school, he at once became the teacher's pet, with the further pride of
madam Natalina Ferrero widow Serra, regular teacher.

Fabrizio was also a curious and smart boy. He liked reading a lot,
learning, and understanding. He admired anyone very much, able to
explain to him a thousand things, anyone able to answer his questions.
His mother, first and foremost.

Madam Natalina, in fact, beside being well cultured, was always pleased
to explain, to teach, her son, and never evaded even the most demanding
questions. She always treated Fabrizio like an adult, in the sense that,
even when she presumed he wasn't yet able to understand everything, she
explained things in simple but correct terms and moreover she never
talked to her son with the classic vocabulary commonly used with small
children - for instance she didn't tell him it was time to go to
"bye-byes", but to go to sleep; if the child hurt himself, she didn't
say "you have ouch-ouch" but is that hurting; and she didn't say "willy"
but penis.

Thus Fabrizio, from childhood, spoke with a rich, correct vocabulary,
surprising the adults and making him seem as if he was older.

When eight years old, Fabrizio already knew how children are born, and
therefore also of sexual intercourse, what menstruations are and the
meaning of ejaculation, even though he hadn't yet experienced this. And
about love, his mother explained to him that this word is used with two
meanings - to really love or just to have sex; and she also explained
that the ideal situation is when these two aspects become one, but that
at times one exists without the other. And when madam Natalina found a
man she liked, she explained to her son that this man was to her more
than a friend - he was her lover.

"Mum, if you love each other, why then don't you marry and he comes to
live here with us?" Fabrizio asked.

"Because... you see, Fabrizio, he cannot marry."

"Is he already married?"

"Well, not exactly. He, you see, is... a priest." The woman said with
some hesitation, but decided not to lie to her son.

"But a priest... should not have sex, right mum?"

"He is presumed not, but at times it's not so easy, mainly when one is
in love."

"Therefore, you cannot live together either."

"That's so, sure."

"But can he not stop being a priest? So at least you can marry, can't
you?"

"To him it's important to continue, he believes in his mission. I cannot
ask him such a thing, as I love him, do you understand?"

"Why priests cannot marry?"

"Because the pope so decided. It has always been so in Catholic Church.
If he were an orthodox priest, or a protestant minister, he could marry.
A catholic priest cannot."

"But then, why doesn't he become an orthodox or a protestant, if he
loves you and would like to live with you?"

"One cannot change his faith only because it is convenient, it wouldn't
be honest. He believes in the teachings of the Catholic Church."

"But the Catholic Church doesn't want him to have sex."

"You see, he has but three options - to obey the pope and not have sex;
become orthodox or protestant; or do as he does, loving me, hiding from
everybody. None of these three solutions is good, none is totally right.
He chose the one that seemed to him the least wrong, even though the
less easy. It's not always simple making a choice, Fabri, but the
important thing is to choose following his own conscience. If one cannot
choose the most correct, he has to choose the least wrong, or the one he
feels to be the least wrong."

Fabrizio met father Carlo and liked him; mainly because he could see
that the priest really loved his mother. He was younger that Natalina, a
handsome man, really likable and good hearted. And, above all, he was
able to explain many things to Fabrizio.

Fabrizio started to attend middle school. He was growing up nicely; he
was a really handsome kid. The big mane of light brown hair, the green
eyes, a healthy complexion, a slender but strong body and his always
smiling face made of him a boy appreciated and well-liked by everyone.

Father Carlo persuaded Natalina to enroll Fabrizio in the boy-scouts of
his parish church. The boy was really happy, because there also, he soon
discovered, through games he was learning a lot of things that one
cannot find in books.

He was put in the "lions" patrol. The patrol-leader (the "PL" as he was
called) was Daniele, a sixteen-year-old boy. Fabrizio had a great
admiration for his PL, who knew so many things and was able to explain
them nicely, who was an athletic and strong boy and who was admired and
esteemed by everybody in the troop.

When Fabrizio was ready for his promise, the ceremony was organized.
Following the troop ritual, on a Friday afternoon he left with his PL
and a two-man ridge tent. They had to reach the troop who was camping
elsewhere on the Sunday morning, walking in the wilds and crossing a
forest where they would spend two nights. Then the PL would accompany
him in front of the altar, in the center of the assembled troop and,
before the Mass, Fabrizio would make his promise with the troop-leader
and the priest as witnesses.

Fabrizio was excited and happy. Daniele and he left the town. They got
off the train and started their march, climbing towards the mountain
pasture. At each stop, his PL explained an article of the boy-scouts'
law to him. Fabrizio listened to him attentively and at times asked
questions to which Daniele answered with competence. The boy was
fascinated by the self-assurance of his PL, just four years older than
him, and yet so adult, who seemed to know everything.

That evening they put up the tent in a forest clearing, then started the
fire to cook their supper. Daniele explained to him how to make a safe
fire, without the risk of setting fire to the forest, how to choose the
right branches to burn without making smoke, how to cook the meal. Then
they ate, sitting near the fire.

"I never felt so good!" Fabrizio said while they were washing pans and
mess-tins in the nearby stream.

"Yes, the night is sweet, now. But later it will chill - look, we can
see all the stars."

"It's fine being here in the forest."

"Aren't you scared?"

"No, I'm with you. Besides, there aren't any dangerous animals here."

"This is your first night in a tent..."

"Yes. You, on the contrary, who knows how many times you slept in a
tent, right?"

"Yes, a lot. I can't count them any more."

"Next year, you'll pass to the rovers' novitiate, won't you?"

"Yes, during summer camp."

"I'm sorry you'll not be my PL anymore. Who'll the new PL be? Do you
know?"

"No, I don't know, the troop leaders will choose him. Possibly Marco,
but I don't know."

"Not Roby? He's your deputy PL, isn't he?"

"Marco is more disciplined. Roby is a really good deputy, but Marco is
more mature."

"So, then, why didn't you choose Marco as your deputy?"

"Just because I fit better with Roby. Anyway it'll not be my decision. I
wasn't a deputy, when I was chosen as a PL either. Well, let's hit the
sack, now. You enter the tent first. Put your shoes there, under the
double roof, so..."

Daniele also entered the small ridge tent; he lit the lantern, and then
unrolled his sleeping bag.

"Tonight it'll be cold. We'd be better to both sleep in my sleeping bag
and put yours around mine. We'll be somewhat cramped but warmer. Pull
off all your clothes, fold them neatly and put them there..." Daniele
said, starting to undress. They stripped to their briefs. Daniele
slipped inside the sleeping bag and keeping the opening wide, told
Fabrizio, "Slip inside too, now, come..."

Fast and nimble the boy slipped in and Daniele switched off the lamp and
closed the zipper. Their bodies were barely brushing and the reciprocal
warmth was most agreeable.

"Are you comfortable?" Daniele asked.

"Yes."

"We are a little tight, but this way we'll not feel the cold."

"Sure."

For a while they kept silent. Fabrizio could hear the light and regular
breathing of his PL. Then he felt a hand brushing his chest.

"Don't you feel cold?" Daniele asked.

"No, I feel fine." The boy answered enjoying that light touch.

Daniele, who was lying on his side facing him, moved himself closer
against Fabrizio's body. "Lay on your side also, facing me, so we will
feel more comfortable." He said, and helped him turn. Then Daniele's
legs crossed Fabrizio's, and his hands caressed his back. "Aren't you
feeling better, this way?" he asked.

"Yes, it's true." The boy answered, gratefully enjoying the warmth of
his elder friend.

Now Daniele was caressing his buttocks and his hands, gradually, made
his briefs slip down.

"You know, Fabrizio, that I like you?" he whispered.

"I too like you." The boy answered, without any implicit meaning, just
thinking he really admired him a lot.

"Caress me, then." The PL suggested.

Fabrizio complied without needing to be told twice and felt that he
liked brushing that sound and beautiful body that he couldn't see but
whose shape he could guess with his hands. Daniele pushed even closer,
clung to him and now Fabrizio could feel Daniele's erection pushing
against his groin, through the fabric of the PL's tented briefs.

Daniele drew his lips close, and kissed him. Even though that was the
first erotic kiss in his life, Fabrizio on instinct opened his lips and
received his PL's tongue - it was odd but also agreeable. Daniele,
became more daring because of the total lack of resistance of the boy,
lowered his own briefs and guided the boy's hand onto his palpitating
member. Fabrizio lightly caressed it, astounded for the firmness and the
size of that hot, quivering flesh pole. He also liked feeling his PL's
hands roaming on his body.

"Do you like?" Daniele asked in a whisper.

"Yes, it's great."

"You never made love?"

"No... How is it done?

"This is how to begin." Daniele said continuing to caress him lightly
but with growing pleasure and desire.

"And then?" Fabrizio asked, made curious.

"Do you want me to teach you?" the PL murmured, with an excited voice.

"Yes, please."

"Then we have to get out of the sleeping bag, to be more comfortable."

"Will we not feel cold?"

"No. Do you mind if I switch on the lamp?"

"No."

Daniele pulled away his briefs and those of the boy. They sat, crossed
legs, one facing the other. Fabrizio admired the beautiful naked body of
Daniele. They caressed each other.

Then Daniele said, "You have a nice little ass. I'd like putting it
inside."

"Alright." The boy answered with simplicity.

"You will really let me take your nice ass?" Daniele asked, almost in
amazement.

"If you like doing it..." Fabrizio answered quietly.

"So then... we must prepare it."

"How?"

"To allow it to slip smoothly inside your hole, without hurting, you
should first lick, suck, lube it with your saliva."

"Oh, yes, I understand." Fabrizio said and, without needing to be asked,
he lent over his PL's lap, took his member with a hand and started to
lick it.

"Do you like?" Daniele asked, a little bit worried.

"Yes, I do... and you?"

"Also. Now take it all inside your mouth. So... yes... good. Don't touch
it with your teeth... move your tongue... clasp your lips... So... and
now move your head, in this way." Daniele said taking his head between
the hands, and making him move it up and down in rhythm.

Fabrizio liked it. Mainly because he could feel he was making his PL
happy.

In fact Daniele was encouraging him, "Yes, good, so... Oh how great...
you're good at it... Go on, yes, go on... suck, Fabrizio, go on..."

Fabrizio was getting down on it and felt him shudder. Daniele was
caressing the nape of his neck, back, and chest - it was agreeable.

After a while, Daniele had him stop, "Here, now kneel here, so... spread
a little your knees... put your chest down on the bag, so... Now I'll
lube your little hole with my spit, then I'll push all it inside you..."

Fabrizio meekly let Daniele put him in position and waited. He felt his
friend's determined hands spread his small, tender but firm cheeks, then
felt the tongue searching for his little hole, lick it, insalivate it -
it was a weird sensation, but really agreeable. Meanwhile Daniele was
caressing his already turgid genitals. Then he felt his PL leaning on
him and felt the tip of his member settling on the well-lubed hole.

"Now relax... I'll enter you, alright?"

"Yes."

Daniele started to push - Fabrizio relaxed. He felt the member pushing,
his sphincter broadening, the member starting to invade him. He felt a
little pain and moaned.

Daniele stopped, "It hurts?"

"A little bit, but I don't care."

"Do you want me to stop?"

"As you like, Dani..."

"I want to put it inside.." Daniele said, hesitantly.

"It's alright, then, go on..." the boy murmured. The scout law says "A
boy-scout smiles and sings also in difficulties", therefore...

"Relax, it will hurt you less." The PL said, resuming his push.

Fabrizio felt him gradually sink in: Daniele's breath was becoming
slightly ragged. The pain was bearable; the feeling of being penetrated
was weird, but not unpleasant. His friend's hands on his body were
pleasurable. And finally he felt it was all inside him, to the hilt.
Daniele stopped for a while, staying deeply embedded in him. Then he
started to slowly withdraw. Fabrizio thought he was pulling it out, but
when only the tip of the friend's member was still inside, Daniele
started to push again and to sink into him - and this time the new
penetration was almost agreeable. When he was totally inside, he again
withdrew, and then slowly sank in again. Yes, it-felt good, the boy
thought, even though he was still feeling a light annoyance.

"God... I like you, Fabri..." Daniele murmured, excited.

"Thank you." The boy answered happily.

Little by little Daniele started to move in and out in a faster and more
resolute rhythm. Fabrizio could feel his vigor and was happily aware
that his friend was drawing an increasing pleasure making love to him.
The brushing of that firm flesh pole inside him, was giving him also
more and more intense and agreeable sensations.

He felt him quiver, tremble, stiffen, then felt he was pushing all
inside and, darting, unloading inside him while his friend emitted low
moans of pleasure. Then he felt him relax, still embedded inside him,
lightly panting.

Daniele slipped out of him, "Let's go back in the sleeping bag, now, or
we'll freeze." He said. They settled, Daniele switched off the lamp and
closed the bag. Their bodies were again one against the other.

"It has been good, hasn't it?" Fabrizio asked, enjoying the warmth of
his friend's body.

"Yes... Was it really your first time?"

"Sure... You, on the contrary..."

"Not my first time, sure."

"You did it with all the patrol members?"

"What? No. You're the first one. No, the second, to tell the truth. But
you're the first who never did it before."

"Who's the other one?"

"Such things are not to be said. I won't tell the others about you. And
you must not tell anybody, promise?"

"Yes, alright."

"If you swear that you'll tell nobody, we can do it again."

"Making love? You and I? Really?"

"Yes, sure. I like you."

"And I like you, a lot."

"So then, you can be my boyfriend. But you have to promise that nobody
will know. It has to be our secret, alright?"

"Yes, Daniele, I promise. But then we will always be sleeping in the big
tent with all the others and we cannot be alone, you and I, can we? How
can we do this?"

"We will find a way. But now let's sleep."

Fabrizio quietly fell asleep, enjoying the warmth of his Daniele's
strong body.

The following morning they woke up, washed in the stream, dressed and
folded the tent. They resumed their path.

"Daniele, am I really your boyfriend, now?"

"Sure, as long as you keep the secret."

"The other one, is he your boyfriend too?"

"No, he's the boyfriend of someone else."

"One of our troop?"

"No, he's the boyfriend of a married man. He doesn't do it with me any
more, since he stays with the other man. He says they are in love. But
in my opinion, that man just wants to fuck his ass. Even though he gives
him presents."

"Is it beautiful being in love?"

"I don't know. It never happened to me. Possibly because I'm too young,
I don't know."

"But he... isn't he younger than you?"

"Well... more or less... You're trying to guess who he is, aren't you?"

"No. If you won't tell me, it's all right. But you said he is in love
with that man, and if he is still in our troop, he cannot be older than
you. But I really don't care to know who he is."

"He says he's in love with that man... I just enjoyed having sex with
him."

"Was he better than me?"

"More skilled, you mean? No. I love also your little ass, so very
tight... and also, you are good at sucking, it really doesn't seem like
your first time."

Fabrizio was glad about these compliments. He was happy having satisfied
his PL.

They spent all Saturday proceeding in their march and Fabrizio felt
happy. In the evening they were tired. They erected the tent and went
in, in the same sleeping bag like the previous night, without even
wearing their briefs. Daniele embraced him tightly and kissed him, but
they fell asleep in a short time, without doing or saying anything. The
following morning Fabrizio woke up first and felt that Daniele was once
again aroused. Therefore, slowly uncovering the naked body of his
friend, he first admired it, then leant to his beautiful member and
started to lick and suck it.

Daniele woke up, "Oh, Fabri, doing that you make me want to fuck you
again." He murmured in a happy tone, caressing the head of his
patroller. The boy doubled his zeal to give him pleasure, until Daniele,
standing up said, "Go, take the position, I'll now slip it all inside
you. So... good. I like your little ass, Fabri." Then, starting to push
it inside him, he added, "Yeah.. I really like it!"

The boy was still feeling some pain, but endured in silence because he
wanted Daniele to be happy with him. Meanwhile he was happily thinking,
"I'll never forget it - on the same day of my promise I discovered how
to make love, thanks to Daniele, my PL, the best of all PL's! And he
chose me to make love, amongst all the patrollers. This is our secret."

Daniele liked the boy's submissiveness, the readiness with which he gave
himself to him, the simplicity and naturalness with which he was
enjoying the fuck.

After Daniele reached his orgasm (Fabrizio didn't yet come, even though
he was feeling an intense pleasure), they tidied themselves and dressed,
folded the tent and resumed their path. Fabrizio was happy, Daniele
satisfied. They reached the place where the troop was waiting for them
and Fabrizio pronounced his solemn promise.

After that day, they were looking for occasions to have sex together
again. It wasn't so easy - both had always somebody at home and it
wasn't simple to find a place were to do it undisturbed, without the
danger of being caught. Fabrizio understood, without needing many
speeches, that what he was doing with Daniele wasn't something you can
talk about, neither with adults nor with friends, even though he was
continuing to ask himself why - after all it was a very beautiful and
good thing and gradually less annoying and more pleasurable.

All that year long they only succeeded to have sex about ten times. It
would have been hard to tell which of them wanted it more. But then,
after the summer camp, Daniele was admitted to the novitiate and it
became even more difficult for them to meet.

One of the last times they made love, Fabrizio for the first time
reached a real and true orgasm and had his first ejaculation - he felt
really proud, and at once also more adult.

His desire to make love caused a change in the boy - now, he became
aware, he was looking at males with different eyes; he tried to imagine
what they were hiding under their trousers fly and how it would be
having sex with them. He also became aware that males attracted him more
and more, mainly if young, and when he saw one with tight trousers,
letting better guess the size of his "tools! (as he called them in his
mind) often got hard.

He imagined then being able to open the youth's fly, to pull out his
member, to kneel in front of him to greedily suck him, and then he
imagined offering himself to the youth for a long and enjoyable
penetration. But Fabrizio was asking himself how to understand who would
have liked doing such things with him. He was not able to find an
answer. So he contented himself to daydream on such occasions.

He could meet Daniele more and more seldom, until he told him he became
the boyfriend of a young man and that, therefore, he was no more
interested in doing it with Fabrizio. The boy was disappointed but, as
he had no option, he resigned himself.

But, now that he knew he had no more chances with Daniele, not being
able to make love was becoming a burden. His fantasies multiplied and
now, when he was masturbating alone, he dreamed to be with one of the
men who had aroused his fantasies during the day.

Fabrizio enrolled in the fine arts high school - his mother, in fact,
having seen he had a talent for drawing, was already thinking to make an
artist of him. The boy would have loved best to attend the classical
studies high school, but he didn't oppose his mothers' decision at all -
he wanted above all that she was happy with him.

His good character, his availability, his natural merriness and
luminosity soon made of him the favourite of both his teachers and
schoolmates. Gradually Fabrizio no longer regretted missing classical
studies - all in all he felt at ease in that school and he liked the
subjects. Moreover he was becoming more and more skilled at drawing.

When he started to learn anatomical drawing, at home, secretly, he
started to draw scenes with naked males engaged in sex. At first not all
were satisfying therefore he threw them into the toilet after tearing
them into small pieces; he collected the others in a folder he kept
hidden on top of the closet of his bedroom. He gradually was becoming
skilled in drawing.

His works were surely very erotic but absolutely not pornographic - they
were in fact all suffused with sweetness and brightness, with a kind of
tenderness making them particularly agreeable to behold. They were
fantasy scenes, some set in open air, in nature, others on a bed, or in
the most different settings, all drawn with pastels, with meticulous
care for details, so that he became able to represent them with a really
astounding realism.

At times the boy got inspiration from classical paintings, at times from
pictures, but in his drawings everything was transformed so that nothing
pointed to the source of his inspiration.

Fabrizio was satisfied with his drawings, but he had a secret worry -
after he had had no more encounters with Daniele, he had them with
nobody else and this was weighing and saddening him, even though he
tried not to show it. The possibility to draw was but a meager outlet to
his compulsions that, as he was maturing, were becoming stronger and
stronger.

The boy was now fifteen years old - for two years he had had no more
sexual encounters. He was physically developing nicely and was becoming
more and more attractive. He had many friends, mainly amongst his
schoolmates and the boy- scouts, but his clean and naive face avoided
him approaches from those of his mates who already knew and loved, or at
least didn't disdain, the joys of a sexual mating with people of their
same sex. And Fabrizio for sure was not the guy who took the initiative,
notwithstanding his desire was becoming stronger with the passing of
time.

Moreover his mates never talked openly about homosexual relations if not
in terms of scorn, especially those who had gay sex, so that, at least
according their speeches, all seemed to be out-and-out heterosexuals, or
at least so they seemed to Fabrizio. Therefore the boy was feeling more
and more lonely and, in a way, unique.

He even came to believe that the only, or almost only, people sharing
his tastes about sex were Daniele, Daniele's friend and their respective
lovers.

And yet, he was reflecting, if his mates, even though with scorn, talked
about "faggots", they had to exist, and not even so few. But who were
they? Where were they? How did they manage to recognize each other? How
could they meet, understand each other? There had to be a way.

Some kid of secret language, perhaps? Something like recognizing
gestures? But how did one learn them? Who taught them? All seemed to him
wrapped in a tight, impenetrable mystery.

He asked himself if he would ever be able to find somebody to explain,
teach him, and help him understand. He could possibly look for Daniele
and ask him...

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CONTINUES IN CHAPTER TWO

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In my home page I've put some more of my stories. If someone wants to
read them, the URL is

http://andrejkoymasky.com

If you want to send me feed-back (really appreciated, be it positive or
negative), please e-mail at

andrej@andrejkoymasky.com

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