Date: Sat, 28 Apr 2001 22:30:29 -0700 (PDT) From: Zane Green Subject: FIRES Copyright Notice: the author copyrights this story and the author retains all rights. Expressly prohibited is placing this story at a for pay site. It is a fantasy, and is not about anyone real. It has minor characters, and is intended only for a mature audience. None of the characters are based on real people. They all grew up in my imagination. Comments are very welcome and appreciated at ZaneG7@excite.com Flames will go up in smoke. I want to thank T for his sage literary advice. Fires by Zane Hunter-Green I couldn't sleep. I had a bad feeling about the next fire. It was going to be a gray fire. I called them that when I felt that someone was going to die. I saw a gray haze and then a golden silver color in the flame. I had never seen that color before. "Hey fag, what are you looking at?" Growled a voice from the next cot. I thought that I was hearing things as I looked over, and saw that Jack had pulled down his covers, and he was lying naked. Some fireman, was my first thought? He would be adding time just to pull on his boxers. If he wasn't so antagonistic I would have laughed at the balding man lying next to me in the silent dorm practically waving his prick in my face." I swear that he was trying to provoke me by waving his profoundly large and juicy cock in my face. He was never going to admit that he was aroused because of me. The fact that his organ glistened from pre-cum made it obvious that whatever fantasy he had evoked in his mind included me doing something with his manhood. I could just guess what my role was. In his fantasy I hungered for him, and either slipped his well endowed prick in my mouth lubing it so he could prepare to slip it in my ass at which point he would shout out that I was assaulting him. Then of course I would lose my job, go to jail and not pass home. I had a dark feeling that was what had caused him such excitement. He wasn't the first to resent me for who I was, or the first to want to take advantage of my sexual preference while blaming it on me. Part of his hatred may have been the fact I opened him to his subconscious that yearned for the love of men. He shut that door pretty quickly. It was easier to make me the target. Sadly it seemed those who fought with themselves the most that wanted to victimize others. I had to sleep on a cot next to him. He also resented the fact that he was stuck at the firehouse during the summer because half of our crew had been drafted upstate to fight the never-ending forest fires. His job description was personnel's and instruction. For that reason he had access to the files. He guessed that I was gay as he knew I was single. I certainly wasn't going to confirm it, and make matters worse by telling him that I had a big enough cock of my own thank you very much bastard. It was the small petite cocketts that I fancied, for that reason sex was not part of my vocabulary. I wasn't going to tell him that I was the best damn firefighter this side of the Rockies because fire was my only life, I did not get my rocks off from the thought of him ramming into my anus. He whispered so only I could hear. "You're not a fireman, you're a flaming queen. I hope you're never in a situation where you need to depend on me because I'd let you burn." I wished that I had a tape recorder on. He was trying to get me into a fight since I wasn't reaching out for the cock he seemed to want me to blow or jack or try on for it's size, I wasn't interested in finding out. I wasn't that foolish. I knew he wanted me out on my ass, anyway he could arrange it. Last year I had received the metal that he thought he was entitled to. He was out for blood. I had been told by friends to watch out for him, but I never thought he would be so crude or obvious. I turned away ignoring him. As soon as I had drifted back to sleep the alarm ran. "SIRENS>>ER EN ER EN ER EN ER EN... We were already marking time. I pulled up pants dashed into boots and slid down the pole, this was an old firehouse. Jeff was already in the truck checking the hoses. Jack the jerk was scowling as we had been assigned the same truck. "Hey Shane, you driving?" Jeff made the statement into a question. "Yes, you run shotgun." I replied. It was a two-alarm fire in my own neighborhood. About two blocks away from the bungalow where I lived. An upscale neighborhood. I happened to own the smallest place. The house with the fire call was a fairly large home, there was nothing outstanding about it. I had passed it dozens of times on my bike, but had never stopped to really examine it. It had a large backyard, which would keep the fire from spreading to nearby houses. The fire looked as if it had started in the kitchen and spread quickly. It took us time to get it out. When we were able to enter the dwelling, unfortunately I discovered a body in the stairwell. It looked like a 30-year-old man. I got that clammy feeling again, a gray fire after all. Neighbors said that he lived alone and they were unaware of any company. There weren't any strange vehicles around. He must have expired from smoke inhalation, as the body had not been in the section of the house that became an inferno. The body was wrapped, and we carried it out side to place on an ambulance. It would be autopsied to see if the man had died because of the fire, or was a crime victim. After he was tagged and removed we stayed around to seal off the house, and check for live embers. I heard rustling in the bushes in the back and sent Jack over to investigate. He scowled again and rambled over. It was more than clear that he didn't like taking commands from me. "It's nothing. Might have been a dog. Or you're seeing things fag." "Get a life Jack, you could be fired for calling me names." "Oh I'm so scared!" This wasn't the time to deck him although I was never so tempted. I wasn't going to give in to his moronic mentality. It seemed sad to me that some adults never outgrew the bully stage, where they thought they were right, and anything that questioned their small lease of reality became their enemy. I almost wanted to laugh at him if he wasn't so pathetic. I was thinking seriously about asking for a transfer. Jack was the son of a town politician so he didn't have to worry overly much. At least I would be off for two weeks starting tomorrow. I think Jack also resented the fact that I had been offered a vacation during the fire season. He had asked for one after mine had been approved, and I had heard that it had been denied. On the way home from the station I decided to stop by the burnt house out of curiosity, or perhaps to see what was left of it. It always made me sad and angry when a life was lost that I couldn't save. I still had my smoky, partial uniform on. I could have showered and changed at the station but I knew that Jack would have found a way to humiliate me in the shower. Hopefully he would be gone when I returned from vacation. Why I was letting the worm get to me was foolish on my part. He was chunky, balding, and besides his impressive prick, he wasn't anything to look at twice. I've been told that if we did a fireman's calendar I would be elected centerfold, and that was out of the mouth of a straight guy. I took care of myself. I worked out, and had the contrast of bright blue eyes with almost black hair that got me more attention than I often wanted. As I say I thought of myself as gay, but my ideal mate went from being a much older man to a youngster like I had been. When I was young I had been loved, and I wanted to do the same. I wanted to find someone young enough that I could change his life as mine had been long ago when I was a young boy. Sometimes it was challenging; cub scouts or school groups came to visit the firehouse and I would be surrounded by a circle of youth. I was usually asked to speak, as I was the one with patience for kids. I knew how to make them laugh as I used humor to tell them the seriousness of having escape plans and fire drills with their families at night. I would go over all of the other cautions that I was never tired of talking about. If I could just save one life, that's what it was all about, that's all it was about. Life is sacred, and my job wasn't really about property, it was about that beyond cost, a life. That, in fact is how I won my award. I did a lot of volunteer work with the kids. Occasionally I would see a pre-teen that reminded me of myself at that age, the same dreamy eyes and swagger, but I was always careful to keep a discreet distance. How Jack would loathe me even more if he knew that I pined for men much younger than both of us. I kept that very secret. Occasionally I would have a date with a man my age. It was fun, but I had a hard time with casual sex. I wanted a commitment first, and when I though of my ideal he was always like myself, when I first fell in love. A young untamed boy. I got out of my Pathfinder and walked back into the property of the destroyed home. The place was sealed off until the insurance company, and fire Marshall could judge the damages, and check for a likely cause. It smelled of burnt timber, but no gas. I instantly ruled out a gas leek. I wondered if this fire had been set deliberately or was an electrical problem. I couldn't really tell. With the fire department suit still on I was able to go behind the lines. The place had that eerie dark look with the burn smells some pleasant like a campfire others more the rotten rubber odor that burns at your nostril hairs. As I walked I heard that rustle again I walked to see what it might be, but what ever it was had become silent, maybe a cat or a family of rabbits I thought to myself. Then I noticed something that shouldn't have been there; it was an old rusty toy firetruck. I picked it up and examined it, and placed it in my pocket. It reminded me of one that I had when I was very young. How sadly ironic it seemed at the time. I heard the noise again. I walked quietly to the bushes to see. Maybe the man had a cat or dog that had escaped the fire and was now terrified. I didn't want to scare it off. I figured if it was a pet, I could take it home with me, and then take it to the animal shelter in the morning. I had a leash and collar in my SUV. I could get it if it was needed. I thought that I saw a pair of large eyes peering at me. Now I was sure this had to be a fairly large dog from the size of the eyes I wondered if I should get a mussel as well. A dog that has gone through a fire could act wild while in shock. I felt that it was still watching me, but when I pulled the dense bushes back it was gone. I talked gently hoping it might come out. "Don't be afraid pet, I only want to help you. Come here sweet, if you're hurt I'll take care of you. Please, don't be scared. You can come out now, I'll help you." I crooned to the dog. It was no use, it wouldn't come out. I sighed and decided to drive home and return with some dog food later. I was in desperate need of cooling down, and getting away from the smoke. I turned away and drove the block or so home. I opened the latch of my backyard and was in such a hurry that I forgot to close it. When I thought about it I figured it could wait. I wanted only to strip off my grubby clothes and dive into the blue waters. I had a private view in the backyard where I had placed my in- ground pool. It was what they now call a diving pool. There were no bells and whistles, but it was a necessity luxury for me. I striped off my uniform, and did a shallow dive into the water; it was cold and cleansing after another helpless fire. It replaced the charred odors with chlorine. I dove under water and went the length of the pool. My prick hardened with agreement at its freedom. I felt like a man let out of the zoo for awhile. Restfully I lay and floated on my back watching the sun play games in the clouds. For once all was right with the world. My fingers crept downward and clasped my throbbing dick as the water kept me buoyant. I dreamed of my perfect lover as I massaged my now hungry cock and balls that never shriveled in the water, but seemed to grow more pedantic. As I imagined him I jacked, he would have hair the color of corn when it's popped, eyes soft and brown, he would be looking at me with love as I kissed his long lashes, his curved eyebrows, his deep pink lips. My hand jerked the harden skin of my tender rod, I was getting good I could almost see him. I jerked myself up from the water when I became aware that I did see him. He was standing at the side of the pool looking at me with his mouth open. I thought about where I left the nearest towel. He backed away and as my eyes focused better as I wiped the water away I saw immediately that he was in bad shape. His hair was so golden that it gleamed in the sunlight although flecks of black char riddled it like sad confetti. His clothes were in terrible shape. They were blackened and torn. I could see strips of red down a hairless arm where he must have been scratched. He smelled of smoke. I don't know what made me do it, but I leaped out of the pool. He stood numbly, and finally broke. He was a wreak of tears against my supporting body. Finally after the longest time I helped him take off his offensive rags. "Don't be scared, I'm going to take you into the pool with me, do you know how to swim?" He shook his head no "I won't let anything happen to you. I promise." He seemed to trust me. I walked with him in my arms down the steps into the shallow end. He clung to me like a very young child as his tears melted with the waters of the silent pool. Then I thought I was feeding the water as well. I knew that I was crying with him. Finally I realized that we were both naked. It wasn't right. "I'm sorry," I said softy, but if the truth were told it was one of the most beautiful moments of my life, to have this finite naked creature against me. With the soot out of his hair, and his face clean, he was gorgeous. I didn't know that they made boys like this. His arms and legs were scraped, but nothing looked serious. His state of mind was another thing altogether. I wondered if the man in the fire had been his father. "Did you come from the house that burnt down?" He responded mutely by simply nodding his head. His hair long as it was made him appear to be a merboy. I wished in a way he was. I wanted only to keep him. His heart beat next to mine as I comforted him. "Did you live there, or were you just watching the fire?" "Lived there." He said in a quiet whisper "I saw you, and followed you home." "What is you name?" I asked. "It's it's Noah, sir." He looked up at me with large milk chocolate eyes, filled with terror. "Did you live there, in that house with your father, Noah?" At that he started to cry again. " No, I lived with my Master," he said, "and he die, died in the fire didn't he?" This really scared the shit out of me because my older friend and lover had been killed in a fire too. I had been a homeless kid and he took care of me. No one knew that we were not related. No one had too. If a kid is well taken care of and no one questions. Who cares? Especially in the poorer, transit parts of LA. He had finally had false records made in case I ever got ill and had to be hospitalized, but no one ever knew that I wasn't related to my friend, and that we were lovers. I grew increasingly uncomfortable however with his use of the word Master. He looked at me as if he had something difficult to say; finally it came out "Will, um will you be my new Master?" He looked into my eyes and then quickly down like a beggar. Listen Noah I am going to give you just one command." "Yes master." He said like he was trying the word on. "You are never to call me Master again. My name is Shane." We need to go into the house to find some clothes for you to wear and so I can get dressed as well. I put him on the side of the pool and pointed to the towels. "Would you hand me one Noah?" "Yes Mas, I mean Shane." He walked over a held up a towel so I easily could take it from him. He tailed me into my screened porch, which led into bedroom through sliding glass doors. As soon as we were inside I felt a smooth hand touch the globe of one buttock. "Noah, what are you doing?" I knew damn well what he was doing. "I think that you're very beautiful Shane. I want you to be my new mast, ah friend." He was a quick learner, and I was quickly coming undone! "Noah, I need to get dressed." "Can I watch you?" "Ahhh, it won't take a minute. Here wait in this chair". I pointed to a white leather chair by my bed. Here read this. I tossed him a magazine and then realized I had thrown him a copy of "Stud Fucks" Shit I said to myself. Well at least it seemed to absorb his interest as he was studying the magazine with his large expressive eyes. I went into my walk-in closet to dress and dig up something that he could wear. When I came out he was spawned on my bed with his eyes closed so I could examine him I suppose. He was a slip of a beautiful boy. His body was creamy and lean, I got a quick look a tiny mushroom head, pale brown on it's short stubby stem, two marshmallow size boy balls, as I quickly threw a blanket over him. I had seen enough to know that he was perfect, that's why I had to get him out of my house as soon as possible. He sat up, and the blanket drifted to the floor. I handed it back to him. "Wrap yourself Indian fashion. We have to have a talk." "Yes Shane, what ever you command me." "Noah, how long did you live in the house that burnt down early this morning?" "A few months ahh Shane." "Do you have a family?" "I have a brother." "Where is he?" "I don't know anymore." "Is he older or younger?" "He's older than me. He's eighteen" "You don't have anyone else, not Grandparents or Aunts and Uncles?" "No just my Master, but he was going to get rid of me tomorrow. There was a man who came to look at me he was really mean, and he told me some of what he would do with me. He said that my brother owed him money. Before I thought that at least Adam knew where I was, he would come back and find me. Then when I heard how Adam was using drugs again and owed them a lot of money I knew it was hopeless. I was Adam's collateral, I think that's the word. So, I started the fire. I crept downstairs when he, my Master was asleep and put oil in the pans, then I turned all the burners on. Then I went upstairs to join him. I was going to sleep through it too because then I knew that Adam would never find me, that he was gone for good." I listened in amazement to his story. I was half in awe with how much he said, and disgusted by his story, but in my life I had seen things too that should never be. It did not shock me that this boy had been through so much. "Dear God, so you started the fire yourself? Is what I managed to say? "Yes, I'm so sorry." He started to sob. Damn if this wasn't getting more complicated. This kid would be mincemeat in the system. He would be booked as a juvenile for starting a fire that killed a man. Even if he had just cause. It was a mess. This boy was bringing me a nest of killer bees, and I had to find a way to contain them. I put my arms around him and pulled him close. When he finally stopped crying I asked him what I couldn't figure out. "How did you get involved with the man you called your Master?" "My bro., bro., brother. He was turning tricks in Hollywood. We had to eat." "What happened to your parents?" "They never came back, Adam said that they were dead." "How long ago?" "Two years, now." "So for two years your brother took care of you both." "Yesssss" "Will you let me stay here with you Shane?" "Noah, I can't promise and break my word to you. I will keep you here tonight, and play tomorrow as it comes." "Will you think about it?" He asked like a stray that had to beg for a home. "Oh yes, I'm thinking" I told him. That was how Noah came into my life.