Date: Fri, 6 Jul 2012 15:49:07 -0400 From: Johnny Smith Subject: Growing Pains Part 3 This story is completely fictional. Names, characters and incidents are a product of the author's imagination, and any resemblance to real people or incidents is completely coincidental. This story contains descriptions of sexual interactions. If you are uncomfortable reading such material, or are not permitted to do so legally, please leave this page immediately. Please read at your own risk. And always practice safe sex! *************************************************************************** The next morning I could hear Kirk downstairs, but I didn't want to see him. I felt embarrassed and uncomfortable, and my ass still hurt, so I just stayed in my room and got online. Sometimes I hung out on a gay teen board, and I logged on and posted that I just lost my virginity to a guy who said he was '95% straight'. I left out the details about him being 13 years older and my sister's semi-boyfriend. Within minutes my online friends started responding, some said 'congrats', others called me a 'slut', but most said that Kirk was probably gay and in the closet. I was also surprised to hear that a lot of other guys felt weird after their first times. It wasn't just me. It seems like there is a lot of build up to it, but when it happens it's just meh... So I tried to look at it like this, 'this was just a physical experience and it doesn't mean that Kirk likes me or he doesn't like me, and I'm better off for getting it over with'. But the questions kept going around and around in my head, and I wondered if everyone online was right and he really was gay. Even though I knew it was impossible for us to have a relationship, I didn't want it to just be a physical experience, I wanted it to mean more and I clung onto that hope. I stayed in my room until I heard Kirk leave and then I slipped out of the house and just drove around aimlessly. I ended up at my girl friend's house and stayed there until after dinner when I knew that Eve was back from Charlotte. It felt cold that night at home. I couldn't look Kirk in the eye and I think Eve was still mad at him. Everything was tense, so I just went to bed early. The weird thing is, in bed I cuddled up to my pillow and couldn't stop thinking about Kirk and the sensation of us having sex. I was hard again and laid on my back, reliving the taste and smell of him, the feeling of his hard, sweaty body rubbing up and down against mine as he made love to me, the feeling of his cock pelting my insides with his seed. I came on my chest and stomach and just left the thick coagulated blobs on my skin until they started to liquefy and drip down my sides. I rubbed it into my skin like it was lotion and tasted it off of my fingers. I imagined it was Kirk's cum and he told me he didn't want me to wash it off, and I was to leave it on as a reminder of him. My fantasy distracted me for a few minutes, but as the jizz dried on my chest I couldn't help but feel an overwhelming sadness, like there was a hole in my chest. Before I had been able to control my feelings by telling myself Kirk was straight and I knew that giving him a blowjob wasn't exactly love. But something changed after we had sex and I couldn't comprehend it, it had my whole body in knots. The next day it was clear that something had changed at the house. It wasn't fun and I longed for the days when Kirk and Eve and I had parties day after day, and spent so much time together. Kirk was still around, but I still couldn't look at him, I felt embarrassed even being in the same room with him. Eve locked herself away in her room, or went out shopping or to the library. After a few days of tension, I was eating cereal in the kitchen when Eve came in looking upset. I wondered what was wrong. "Are you OK?" "Oh, don't ask, I should have seen it coming." "Seen what coming?" "Kirk, just being himself.." She was spraying down the counters with 409 and started scrubbing like a lunatic. "What's happening to Kirk, did you guys get into another fight?" "Not really, he just said he's leaving tomorrow that's all. Something about his friends in Baja... You know, same old shit. Here today, gone tomorrow." "Leaving? Like for a week or for good?" "Who knows. It will probably be a year before I see him again, if ever ....I knew he was going to do this, I KNEW it.." My guts clenched up like I was falling. I wanted to say something else, but I couldn't. I couldn't think, my head was spinning and I couldn't figure out what was going on. I tried to eat, but the cereal just turned to mush in my mouth and I couldn't swallow it. After her announcement my sister stormed out, and I could hear the car pulling out of the driveway. I just sat on the bar stool and stared into my cereal as the flakes floated around the milk like rotten leaves. I climbed off the stool and sort of wondered the house in circles, building up the courage to go upstairs and talk to Kirk. When I finally made it upstairs I found him at the desk in the guest room, working on his laptop. I could see pictures of surfers on the screen. "Is that Mexico?" I mumbled. "Oh, hey. Yeah, pretty awesome isn't it. Here take a look." I sat on the bed so I could see the computer and he started talking, but I wasn't listening. When he finished, I opened my jaw and started blubbering, not even sure what I was saying. "I just want to say I'm sorry." "What?" "I know it was stupid of me and I'm really, really sorry." "Sorry for what?" "I don't know, I just feel like everything is so fucked up right now." I would never start crying in front of my parents, but it was Kirk and the tears just started flowing out. "I just feel like if I didn't ask you to do what we did, then things would be ok between you and Eve, and she wouldn't be upset and you wouldn't be leaving. And I feel terrible about it, really, really terrible. And guilty about it. And I feel like if I could control myself I would, but I can't. I can't stop thinking about you, even for one minute, and I'm happy about the things we did, the happiest I've every felt in my life, and I feel bad for being happy. And maybe it was all a mistake. I don't know... Its like I can't be happy without being sad. It's fucked. But I know I really don't want you to leave. Please don't leave. Please, please don't leave. Just stay another week. I'll leave you alone if you stay. " Kirk got up and sat next to me on the bed. "Bo, I'm not sure what's going on here. I liked what we did together too. You're sister and I have been friends for a long time and whatever happens between us doesn't have anything to do with you. You're a good guy and I'm sorry, maybe we shouldn't have taken it as far as we did." "No, it's the best thing that's happened to me." I pleaded. "I'm glad we did it. I really am... I know I've been acting weird, I'm sorry. I'm just trying to figure out some things and it's been really hard... It took a while but now I know what my problem is." "What's that?" He said curiously. "It's just that... I'm in love with you." Kirk breathed a deep sighed. "I know you don't love me back. You don't have to say anything. I wasn't going to tell you. It just came out, but it's true." He wasn't reacting but I needed to feel something from him and I leaned into him, pressing my wet cheek against his chest. "See why I want you to stay. We both do." "I know you do, but I was never planning on staying the whole summer. Something came up and I need to jump on it. It's a great opportunity." I wrapped both my arms around him and just held onto him. He reached an arm around me and gently rubbed my back. "I don't know what I'm going to do when you leave. I don't want to be alone again." "You are going to go back to hanging out with your friends and going to parties and start hooking up with other guys. You're going to forget all about me." He didn't know how badly this comment stung me; he was just trying to be nice. I wanted to protest, but I had already spilled my guts and there was nothing left to say. You can't argue someone into feeling for you. If he felt something for me he would have said it, but I knew he didn't. We stayed holding onto each other for a long time, my eyes closed and soggy from the tears. When I opened them I could see his bare neck not far from me. I leaned in and kissed it gently, and Kirk didn't resist. I kissed it again, a little longer this time, holding my lips against his soft skin, tasting him. The confusing thoughts that had been swirling around in my head had stopped for the first time in days. They were replaced with something clear and unambiguous; sex. My cock started growing down my pants leg, recharged, and I sat up on one leg so I was facing Kirk and kissed his neck some more, he turned his face to me and I kissed his cheeks, his chin, his forehead, and finally his lips. When our lips met our mouths opened and he came to life, muscling his tongue into my mouth with the force of a hurricane. His grip had tightened on my back and he held me steady as our tongues fought back in forth, and he pressed into me, the tiny sharp edges of his beard, slashing open the tender skin on my chin. I reached between his legs and a firm bulge was already growing in his jeans. With our mouths still enmeshed I worked my fingers around the top of his pants. The button fly popped apart with little effort and I reached down the front of them and found his shaft, as hot and hard as a blacksmith's iron. I squeezed him through his cotton briefs a few times before reaching into the elastic waistband. The first thing I felt was his thick curly bush, and I glided through it and found the firm sweaty base of his cock. I followed its length about halfway and then lifted it up so it was sticking up out of underwear. I was stroking it up and down as we continued to kiss. The synapses in my brain were firing all at once, all the built up fear, anger and confusion that I'd been feeling roiled through me and burst through my fingers, lips, cock and ass in a release of frenetic energy. My body was consumed as if by a demon and I gripped on to Kirk for salvation. I was leaning down to take his cock in my mouth when Kirk said, "Take off your shorts." I stood up, slithered out of my shorts and pulled off my t-shirt. Kirk was still sitting on the edge of the bed, but he had pushed his jeans down to around his ankles and his cock was standing straight up and his balls were hanging down between his open legs. He motioned for me to stand right in front of him and from somewhere he produced a small container of lube and began squirting some into his hand. "Turn around and spread your legs." he told me. As I spread my legs apart and bent over I could feel him cover my ass with the slippery lube. He didn't just focus on my hole, but spread it up and down my crack, quickly coating my entire backside, working his way to my balls, which he fondled and pulled on with slippery fingers. He dropped my nut sack and I felt the pressure of his finger swirling around my hole, then with little warning he pushed it all the way inside. I hadn't fingered myself since we had sex and I was tight again, but the pain was welcomed and I willed myself to relax and open up as his finger darted in and out of me. After loosening me up and getting me wet, he turned me back around and I watched as he started working the lube up and down the length of his shaft. He was breathing low as his rough hand slowly slid over the tip, pulling up his foreskin with it, only to pull it back again as his hand moved down, exposing the red, oversized head. He did this several times, relishing the pleasure of his own hand, and I held my own dick in imitation, watching it. Then he looked up at me. "Climb up here." he said pushing himself back so he was firmly on the bed. He was sitting up and I climbed onto him and placed a knee on either side of his hips, straddling him. He held his cock so it pointed straight up under me, and my legs were spread apart, all I had to do was lower myself and he'd slip inside. But I hesitated. I remembered how much it hurt the first time and although everything in me wanted to push down, I was scared. We were face to face and I just leaned in and kissed him. As we kissed I reached down and took his cock from him, which he freely gave to me. I held it firm and slowly lowered myself until I could feel it pressing into my body. I had to break free from our kiss, as I moved my body around to where I could feel his cock pressing directly against my wet, clenched sphincter. I sighed when these two most sensitive parts of our body touched, and Kirk could feel it too. He grabbed my hips and started pulling me down on him and I could feel my asshole being spread apart. I put my hands on his to slow him down, but he rested only a moment before pulling me down further, forcing my anus open with his cock head. The painful, stretched open feeling was there like before, but it wasn't nearly as intense as the first time. I watched Kirk's face as he pulled me down further. In one steady movement he pulled me down onto him, feeding his cock inch by inch up into me, not stopping until the full length of him was wrapped in the warm, deep sleeve between my legs. I rested there, feeling the pressure of him spreading me open, giving my body time to get used to being penetrated again. After a minute I kissed him and began to lift up from him, using my hips to make circular motions. The pain inside me eased off, and I once again wanted to be filled by him and lowered back down to the wide base of his rod. I lifted up higher this time and pushed down trying to swallow his entire penis, pressing my ass against his bushy pubic hair and tightening my anus around him. Then up again before I was back down all the way, forcing the air out of my lungs in a gasp. Kirk reached behind me and clutched an ass check in each of his hard, calloused hands, digging his nails into me. He spread them apart and started lifting me up and then pushing me down again. His fingers were cutting into my skin and as I picked up speed riding up and down the whole length of him. He lifted me up then pulled me down with his strong arms, while I used my legs to support the rest of my weight and began to move with the steady pace of a machine. I closed my eyes and I could feel his hard shaft, as solid and straight as a pipe spreading me open, exploring the depth of me. I'd sit up high and balanced on top of it, almost to the point when it would come out, but then lower myself, consuming it again inside. I wanted his cum and I worked him up and down as fast as I could trying to get him off. My own cock was starting to tingle as it rubbed up against Kirk's chest with every up and down motion and even though I didn't touch it, I knew that if I kept doing this my orgasm would build without any help from my hand. I asked Kirk if it felt good to him and all he could say was to not stop doing what I was doing. I was hot and starting to pour sweat as I continued to ride Kirk's cock up and down with a fury. The nerves inside me were getting hit and I could feel the pressure building up inside me. I wrapped my arms around Kirk's shoulders and pulled him close to me as I kept up riding him. Our wet bodies pressed together and my legs were spread open, pushing my dick and balls against his hard sweaty stomach, as I continued the up and down motion. My butt was landing hard against his lap now and I couldn't help but cry out a girlish moan every time his cock pushed up into the furthest depths of me. I couldn't take it any longer and squeezed his cock with the grip of my ass and felt a surge of pressure shoot through the shaft of my cock as my cum was flung out and splattered against Kirk's chest. There was a fire in every part of me as I clung to him, holding on for dear life as my hips bucked forwarded projecting my cum out while at the same time, pulling his cock deeper in. I buried my face into his neck and tried to catch my breath. Kirk wrapped his arms around me in a way more tender than he ever done before. And I tightened my grip on him, knowing that my time with him was running short. But although I had spent a lot of energy, I was fully aware that his thick cock was still penetrating me and our session wasn't over yet. I adjusted my legs and lifted off of him again and slowly began to work him up and down again, but Kirk stopped me. He told me to hold on to him and then without pulling himself out of me, he stood up and turned around and laid me on the bed on my back. He bent over me with his feet firmly planted on the ground and his dick firmly buried up my ass. My cock had softened and in a way I was glad. I didn't want it to distract Kirk or me, so I gathered up my dick and balls in my hand, and pulled them up toward my chest, keeping them covered, and spread my legs further apart. I wanted to show Kirk that I was ready for him and that I wanted to keep going. I wanted him to know that the pleasure I felt coming was nothing compared to the pleasure I felt when he was inside me. He understood me very clearly. He pushed my legs up and back so my hole was facing up to him, then, with both feet on the ground, he started to push in until his bush was flat against me. My ass was soft and open and there was no resistance as Kirk began a slow rhythmic motion. He was pulling his cock back far, making long strokes, then pushing in, with just a light kiss against my ass before beginning the cycle again. After I had come the urgency that forced me to ride Kirk's cock like someone possessed had passed and I fell back into a lazy sort of trance. Less focused on trying to get off, or get Kirk off, I just allowed the sensations to wash over me. Kirk was a man with lots of experience and he was in no hurry to rush through what was almost certainly our last fuck. He was taking his time, savoring every motion, taking in every pulse of electricity that was generated from his broad cock head as it slid through the delicate warmth that enveloped it. He savored the thud when his cock reached its limit and the ring of my anus tightened around the hairy base of his manhood and his balls were pressed against my hard, muscled backside. He liked it when I squirmed, as his cock reached to that part of me that was tightest and most tender. I laid on my back, receiving him for a long time, but with time the cadence began to increase. It was still controlled, steady, but he was moving in and out more quickly and he was hitting me harder and harder. He leaned over me and kissed me forcefully while keeping up the motion with his hips. He was now hitting me with such force that I was being pushed back on the bed. I gripped the sheets, but they just came off the bed with me. Kirk was pounding harder against me now and with each hard fuck all I could do was cry, "Uh, Uh, Uh." Kirk had crawled onto the bed and on top of me now, as he fucked me hard and steady. I hooked my feet around his back to help keep us joined and held on to him. He was starting to sweat a lot and the hopsy essence of his body was pouring off of him and onto me. It was like the smell of the other boys after a track meet, a mix of dirt and sweat and adrenaline that hung over us as we jumped and hugged on each other after defeating our rivals. It was in his hair, his shoulders, his lips and his breath. Flowing out of him and onto me. He locked each others' eyes, his were wide and dark and deep. Eyes that held mysterious of a life I knew nothing about, and yet they belonged to a man that I yearned for with the deepest and most intimate atom of my being. A man I wanted to whisper all my secrets to, to share everything with. Had he asked me to quit school and go to Mexico I wouldn't have hesitated. He was studying me too and I was conscious that my face winced and contorted as he was forcing himself hard into me, but I didn't know how else I was supposed to look. "Are you doing ok?" He whispered. "Yeah, I like it." "Good I like it too." But as he spoke he paused and lifted himself off of me. As he sat up his firm, thick cock was pulled out of me, and my ass closed up behind it. I instinctively reached in between my legs and touched my asshole. It was tender and swollen, but still supple. Kirk was kneeling between my legs now. His wet cock pointing at me accusingly, the big red head jutting out from the foreskin like an vulgar nose. "Can we try something else?" He asked with eager eyes. "Yeah, I want to do whatever you want." "Awesome, get up on your hands and knees." I obliged and crawled up on all fours like he asked. He pushed my head down and I arched my back up so my asshole was pointing directly at him. There was something impersonal about this position and at first I was reluctant to do it, but I wanted to make him happy. He may not have loved me, but I knew he enjoyed fucking me, and although I could have laid beneath him, staring into his eyes forever, my heart knew that all Kirk wanted was to blow his load, and I decided I would give into his desire, whatever it was. He spit on my asshole and fingered it in, then spit on his own cock so the tip was wet. I could feel it push against me and as the head spread me apart it still stung. He fed his long cock into me, opening up my insides, then he pulled back gripped my hips and started a fast rhythmic motion. It wasn't long before he was hitting me hard again, like the time in the living room when I lost my virginity. I called out his name, "Kirk, uh, Kirk, oh God Kirk." And lost myself in the sensation of being penetrated. He was merciless and it reminded me of the rough masculinity that attracted me to him in the first place. I knew what he was like, what he always had been like. He was raw and uninhibited. He fucked me like he fucked my sister, like he had fucked the girls in Mexico and Costa Rica and high school, like he fucked the boys, the one he was attracted to and the one he wasn't and God knows how many others. I was another one of his victories, even if just an easy one. He told me himself, I was a cock fiend, a pretty boy with a girlish disposition, and I could see now that he had encouraged me. He knew I was awake that first day by the pool when he jerked off outside. It was an advertisement, and I had bought the whole thing. I wanted him to fuck me hard now and told him so, "Fuck me hard Kirk, Fuck me harder." My butt was like jelly and he slammed himself as hard as he could against me, his entire body tensing and jerking, working in one motion. My cock was stiff as a rod again but I ignored it, all I could think about was Kirk, Kirk and his cock. "Fuck me Kirk! Come in me. I want to feel your cum in me." It was all I could think or say. He moved his hand up to my shoulders and kept pounding down on me. I could feel him on the backs of my legs, on the cheeks on my ass, and inside me. The pressure pushed me down and I couldn't hold my ass up any more, my knees gave out and I collapsed on my stomach. Kirk climbed on top of me and rested his weight on my back and continued to use his hips to glide his cock up and back in me. He was fucking me shallow now, just darting a few inches into me with his cockhead, quickly, than pulling back, like a frantic little animal. He pulled back too far and it slipped out, but he pushed it back into me with easy thrust of his hips and he repeated this many times, retracting his cock so that my ass would close up then pushing back in just a few inches. It was like I was feeling the first penetration over and over again and the intensity was different than anything I had felt so far. He pushed deep and pressed his weight onto me and sputtered, "I'm gonna come in you Bo." A wave of ecstasy passed over me when he said my name. "I want it." And I arched my back, pushing up my butt to receive him. Kirk slowed and clenched his teeth together and groaned a deep and menacing growl. His cock swelled to it's fullest as the roar of semen passed from deep in his body, down the length of his cock and out of the head, splattering against the lining of my rectum. His balls tightened against his body and he gripped me tight as his body launched a rapid succession of load after load of the warm sticky liquid into me. Now it was Kirk's turn to be powerless against the demands of his body. All he could do was hold onto me until the spasms stopped and his balls were empty which seemed to take a long time. When the orgasm finally did stop Kirk was a limp body, almost asleep on top of me. I rested there on my stomach as Kirk lazily tried to catch his breathe, leaving his cock in me, intent to stay there for a while. My ass felt full, but it wasn't from the unforgiving stiffness of his cock, it was the thick, creamy jizz that Kirk had expelled into my body. I didn't want him to leave. I knew it was the last time and I wanted it to last forever. When he started to pull away I stopped him. "Please don't move. Just stay like this a little while longer." He didn't move, but I could feel that his cock was no longer reaching deep into me and wasn't stiff. But he did stay there. He let me savor it until boredom or discomfort forced him to climb off of me, pulling his soft, little penis out of me too. His cum had dissipated into the deep corners of my body and I sat up, now feeling empty. We sat on the bed together, naked, just looking at each other. I leaned in and kissed him. I loved him in a way that almost hurt, but I knew that it was a pain that I'd have to deal with on my own. Maybe he had set me up, and I was just another fuck to him, but he had brought me so much happiness that I couldn't be mad at him. I spread out on the bed and rested my head on his lap. I could smell the mixture of his body odor, the spit, lube, cum and my ass coming up from his dick and balls, but I didn't mind. It was crude and animalistic, but so was the sex we just had. I wanted to ask him to stay again, I wanted to tell him I loved him again, I wanted to plead and beg and physically hold him down if I could, but I knew it was useless and so I was silent. Our time was short and it was coming to an end. It was Kirk who finally said we needed to shower and get dressed before Eve came home. I knew it was time and I went to my own bathroom, locked the door, turned the shower on high, and sat on the floor and cried. I cried harder then I had in years. Not since my hamster died when I was 8, and I was convinced it was because I had forgotten to feed it. I purged myself of all the feelings that had built up since he came to my house 6 weeks ago, and there was a lot there. I poured myself out onto the cold tile floor and when I was done I slept. I slept there naked on the floor with the water running. When I woke up, Eve was banging on the door. "Bo! What are you doing in there? Are you alright?" "Sorry. Don't come in, I just fell asleep." "Then turn off the shower, you've used up all the hot water." "Sorry, I don't know what happened, I think I was really tired." "Just come down stairs, dinner will be ready soon." I turned off the water, which had turned cool and got dressed for dinner. The shower would just have to wait. At dinner, Kirk made desperate jokes and small talk, but no one was in the mood. I watched Eve, feeling closer to her now then I had ever felt. Now I knew what their relationship was like, but I could never tell her. I had betrayed her. So I just ate without saying a word. Late that night after some TV, I hugged Kirk tight and told him 'Goodbye'. He was leaving at 5 the next morning and I wouldn't see him again. In my room I wrote a note and snuck into Kirk's room and put it in his bag. It read: "Dearest Kirk, if there is one thing for certain, you have changed my life. It has been a mixture of pleasure and pain, but I am a more mature person for it. I don't know what I mean to you, but you will always mean a great deal to me, and there is a special place in my heart that will always belong to you. Please think of me as I will always be thinking of you. Forever yours, Bo. xoxo" I still haven't heard back from him, but I didn't expect to. It's just something that I wanted to say and so I did. It still hurts to think about him, but I'm getting over it and hopefully some day I'll find someone my own age and we will live happily ever after. At least that is the plan. But now I know that there are more things to come my way that I have not even yet imagined, and in a way, the not knowing is more exciting than anything.