How it Changed
This is fiction. It's only true insofar as all decent fiction is true. That is to say, the characters are not real. They're made up. The situations never happened. The events never occurred. But, there's truth here. Remember, boys don't know about sex. Well, okay, maybe they do. But, they don't want to have sex. Well, okay, some do. But, they certainly wouldn't want sex with adults. Well, maybe some would. But, they definitely wouldn't enjoy it. And they most definitely wouldn't start it. Okay, forget all that. Maybe they would, but, if they did, they would most definitely be irreparably harmed for life by it....
Don't read this if you're not allowed. By your parents. Or your government. Or whoever. If you do anyway, it's your problem if you're caught. Not mine.
I might be only eleven, but I wasn't stupid.
I knew exactly what he was doing. But that wasn't the problem.
The problem was, as I sat there on his lap in front of the TV, I wasn't at all sure if I wanted him to do it.
Maybe that's not quite honest. The problem was really that I kind of did want him to do it. And I don't know why. I knew it was supposed to be wrong and horrible. Everybody said so. And that confused me. And scared me. A little bit.
These thoughts were going back and forth through my head as I felt, and watched, his hand on my bare leg. It continued to rub in slow circles, his left hand on my left leg, now several inches above my knee and continuing its slow journey northwards.
Like I said, I'm not stupid. That hand, and the lump I could feel underneath my butt, was pretty clear. That lump wasn't his car keys. Or his wallet.
I still didn't move. I was leaning back, reclined into his chest. My legs alongside his, one outside his left leg and the other between them. My left hand was resting on the couch, near my leg, near his roving hand. My right hand was resting on my right leg. His right hand was resting on my right arm, his hand wrapped comfortably and loosely around my wrist.
So there we were.
I wondered if he could feel my beating heart. I couldn't see how not. It was hammering so hard my chest was bouncing. And I could certainly feel his, which seemed to be hammering just as hard against my back.
The hand moved another inch higher, now just below the leg of my boxer shorts.
I wasn't hard, not quite. I was too excited, and scared, to be hard. But I could feel the tingling that meant it was close.
So, what to do?
I knew exactly what I should do. What my mom would have wanted me to do. I should jump up, tell him to leave me alone and not come near me. I should run outside with the phone and call Mom. Or the police. Or both. Then watch as they came and asked horrible uncomfortable questions and led him away in handcuffs and Mom cried and looked stricken.
But I wasn't going to do that. I knew that already. No matter what, I wasn't going to do that.
The movie ended. The credits began rolling up the screen. Neither of us moved, except for his circling hand.
I reached out, with my left hand, and picked up the remote control lying a few inches away from it. I hit 'stop', then without a word, went into the netflix menu and picked another movie and hit play.
I set the remote down, right where I picked it up from. I set my hand down, right where it had been too. The movie began to play. His left hand, which had stopped its movements during my button pushing, started its slow circles again. Good.
Not good. That's what I was supposed to think. To feel. I still didn't move though, just took a couple of deep breaths and relaxed further into his chest as I watched the movie do that thing at the beginning where they show the main characters doing weird things to show us what kind of characters they were.
I tried not to think about it. His hand. I really did. That was easier. All this thinking, all this confusion, wasn't much fun. And I'd been having so much fun.
That didn't work though.
His hand finally reached the bottom of my boxer shorts.
Took long enough. About time.
Damn it. There I go again.
I watched it curiously. My attention not on the movie anymore. From the angle of his head, I don't think his attention was on the movie either.
More circles. His hand was a bit sweaty. And warm. It felt electric.
His thumb moved barely underneath the hem of the left leg of my boxer shorts. I caught my breath.
My head was spinning. I didn't know what to think. What to do. His hand moved slightly further.
I moved my hand. My left hand. I lifted it, and placed it on top of his left hand, the roving hand. He stopped the circles immediately.
I gently, so gently I think it was almost imperceptible, pushed his hand. Down. Back towards my knee. I didn't think about it first. It's just what I did.
He moved his hand. All the way down to my knee, then slid it off my leg. My leg felt suddenly cold.
At the same time, I could feel him tense up. Like every muscle in him suddenly became taut.
The lump underneath my butt vanished.
He didn't say anything. I didn't say anything.
I turned my head. I looked at his face.
His eyes were locked on the TV. But they weren't moving. They were wide open. His face was drawn tight.
He looked scared.
I hadn't ever seen that before. Not on him. His face usually looked warm. Confident. Laughing. Understanding. Listening. Knowledgeable.
Not like that.
I didn't like it.
I didn't like it at all.
I turned my head back to the TV. Not knowing what else to do. What was I supposed to do? What was I supposed to say? "Sorry for stopping you from feeling my dick?"
I don't think so.
Especially since I don't know why I stopped him. Especially since my dick kind of seemed a bit mad at me. Because it was cold and empty. Like me.
He shifted. Then he moved me off his lap and stood up. He looked at me for a half a second. His face still tense.
He turned and went into the kitchen. I could hear him get a glass out of the cupboard and fill it with water from the tap. I could hear him drink it down, all in one big gulp.
Then I couldn't hear anything for a minute. I wonder what he was doing.
Then he was back in the living room, standing in front of me. His face was more relaxed now. Almost like it usually was.
"It's late, Donny. Time for bed I think," he said.
I looked up and nodded, "Okay, Mike." I stood and stretched, aware of his eyes on me. I didn't care. In fact, that's what I wanted. That's why I always stretched the way I did. Pushing my pelvis out like that while I reached my hands to the ceiling.
I padded upstairs to brush my teeth. I could feel his eyes on me as I ascended the stairs.
Lying in bed five minutes later, I couldn't help thinking. I couldn't help wondering.
Why did I stop him? Why did I not stop him sooner?
I didn't know.
I just knew I wanted him to do it again.
I knew that for sure, now.
I waited for him to come and say goodnight. Like he always did.
I could hear him on the stairs.
He opened my door. He didn't come in though. That was weird.
He was supposed to come in, sit down on my bed beside me, rub my hair with one hand, talk to me, and laugh, and smile. Then he was supposed to kiss the top of my head lightly, say goodnight, and leave.
That's what he always did when he put me to bed.
Not tonight, though.
Tonight, he stuck his head into the doorway, smiled at me and said, "Goodnight, Donny. Sleep well."
Then he was gone. Just like that.
I felt cold. And alone.
I lay there looking at the ceiling. My thoughts swirling.
Ten minutes. Maybe fifteen. I was still laying there. Still thinking. Still looking at the ceiling.
Then I heard Mike on the stairs again. I wonder if he was going to bed too.
But he didn't head to his room. Instead, he headed to mine. I could hear him stop, just outside my door. Then he knocked softly. I think he was worried he'd wake me if I was asleep already.
No chance of that.
In a soft voice, I said, "Come in."
I had no idea what to expect.
He came in.
He walked over to my bed and sat on it, beside me, the way he usually did. He rubbed his hand on the top of my head, also the way he usually did. He smiled at me.
Then, he moved his hand off my head. The smile vanished. It was replaced by another look. One I couldn't really identify.
"I couldn't leave it like this, Donny," he said. "I was hoping you'd still be awake."
I looked at him and nodded. But I didn't answer.
"I owe you....an apology. And an explanation, I think. I was going to just ignore it. Pretend it didn't happen.
"But I couldn't. It wouldn't have been right.
"So, if you will, let me say what I need to say. Then I'll answer any questions. Anything. Then, you can decide...." He stopped talking.
I just looked at him.
He took a deep breath. "I'm sorry, Donny. I shouldn't have done that. Rubbed your leg like that. Moved my hand up to your boxers like that. It wasn't right." He was looking straight at me, his eyes intense, and honest. Much more like the eyes I knew and loved.
"I did it because I wasn't thinking." He stopped again and took another two breaths. He seemed to be thinking hard about something.
"No. I promised myself I'd be honest. You deserve that. And more." More breaths. "Donny, I did that because I wanted to. Because I find you almost irresistible. Because I was...." He paused for a long beat. "....horny."
His eyes moved away from mine guiltily. Then back again. "That means turned on. Sexy. You know..."
I spoke for the first time, interrupting him, "I know what it means," I said.
He looked at me and nodded, "Yeah, I thought you might," he said.
"That's not an excuse. That's an explanation. I don't have an excuse." Again a pause. "You know when you get mad? At your mom? Or me? For whatever?"
"Well, it's like that. When you get mad, you're allowed to be mad. You're allowed to feel however you feel. But we're not allowed to act however we feel like acting. When you're really mad, you might want to yell and swear and scream. But you have to control that. To do something different."
I nodded again. I knew that. Mom and him and told me often enough.
"Well, this is the same exact thing. I was horny. But that didn't give me the right to hold you on my lap like that, with an erection that I know you could feel. And to rub your leg like that. We both know where that was going. Before you stopped me. I'm really glad you did."
That's why I loved Mike. No matter what, and completely unlike almost every other adult I knew, he was honest. He didn't treat me like some idiot kid. Like I couldn't figure anything out. He treated me with, well, with respect.
I had a question though. And I found the courage to ask it. He was being so honest with me, he deserved the same. "How come, though?" I asked. "I mean, why were you so horny? We were just watching a movie. Like we always do when Mom's out and you're watching me. There wasn't anybody else there. Why would you be horny?"
He laughed. "Oh, Donny," he said. "I didn't need anybody else, or anything else. That was enough."
I blinked and nodded, thinking about his answer.
"Anyway, I'm going to say goodnight now. And go downstairs. But if you want to say anything, I promise to listen. If you want to ask me anything, I promise I'll answer fully. And then you will have a decision to make. One I forced you in to. Which is why what I did is so wrong, here and now. You'll have to decide what to do. Who to talk to. What comes next. And you should. Talk to whoever you need to, I mean." He looked tense again. But still determined.
Like I said, I might be only eleven, but I'm not stupid. I knew that if I told anyone, there would be questions. And people would get involved. I would be grilled by strangers. Mom would completely freak out. He would probably be in bad, bad trouble. Maybe even get locked up.
And yet, there he was. Sitting there like nothing. Telling me that I should do exactly that. If I wanted to. Or needed to.
How could I not love him.
"What if I only want...need...to talk to you?" I asked.
He hesitated. "I....don't know," he said. "Maybe we'll need to figure this out. We'll need to make sure that's the right thing to do for you."
See what I mean? He always does that. Most adults, when you ask them something they don't know, they don't say, "I don't know." They make up some bullshit. They tell you half what they know and half something they made up on the spur of the moment. Or they tell you to go look it up yourself, acting all smug, like they know and you don't. Even when it's obvious.
I was getting tired of how tense he looked. "Mike," I said, a bit of exasperation in my voice. Intentionally. "You making a big deal out of it. You didn't even touch my....me. You didn't do anything. Except rub my leg. What is there to ask? Or say?"
"Donny. Are you being completely honest right now?"
I blushed a bit, though I don't think he could see it in the dark room. "No," I answered.
He smiled. "Okay, then. Answer your own question."
"Because...because I guess it kind of is a big deal. Because you were going to....touch me....touch my...." I was having a hard time, but I figured I might as well say it. "...my dick. We both knew it. We're not supposed to pretend we don't. It's not good to pretend things like that. You always say."
He nodded. He was smiling proudly. I liked that. But he looked sad too.
"Yeah. I was. Then you stopped me. That's why it's a big deal. That's why we're talking now. So...before I go downstairs...anything you need to say? Any questions?"
"So what happens now?"
He looked serious. "That's up to you, Donny. But no matter what, you didn't do anything wrong. I'm just a horny old perv who almost got carried away, and who had to get an eleven year old with more control than me to stop him. No matter what, you're a perfect kid, just like you are, and you can't make a wrong decision here. No matter what."
I knew he wasn't being quite honest now. Not that he was lying. He wasn't. It's just that he was talking totally about me. Not him. When he said the bit about not making a wrong decision. That wasn't true. I kept that thought to myself though.
"No, I don't have any more questions. Not tonight."
He smiled. "Okay, Donny. I'm downstairs if you change your mind." He reached into his jeans pocket and pulled out his phone. He set it on my bedside table. He didn't say anything, but he made sure I saw him do it.
I knew why. He didn't want me to feel scared. To feel trapped. Like I didn't have any choices.
He kissed the top of my head like he always does, gave me a brief hug, then got up and left my room.
He was walking different though. I could see that. Without his usual spring.
I put my head back down on my pillow and resumed staring at the ceiling. Now I had even more to think about.
I thought about his hand on my leg. Rubbing, circling, gently moving ever closer to my groin.
My penis became erect.
I slid my hand into my boxers. I encircled my penis with my thumb and two fingers. I began masturbating. Stroking. Slowly. Up, over the head of my penis to the tip, then down to the base, pulling my foreskin down with it. Then up again.
Usually when I did this, I was thinking about Joey. From school. Or Nick. Not that I'd ever tell them of course. But I often thought of them, when I'd rub it. I'd seen them naked often enough. When swimming, or at sleepovers. Not hard though. That part I'd imagine.
Or, I'd think of the pictures I'd seen on the internet. From those web sites. The ones I wasn't supposed to go to. The ones with men having all kinds of sex in all kinds of ways.
Not tonight though.
Tonight, I was thinking about Mike. And his hand. And the lump under my butt.
I had learned how to jack off a year ago. From school.
And some people say kids don't learn much in school. Some people say sex-ed is a bad thing.
I was in grade five. We were taking the sex-ed class. We got to the part about masturbation.
Mr. Cooper explained what it was. James Robertson raised his hand to ask a question.
"But why?" he asked. "Why do people do that?"
Mr. Cooper laughed. "Because it feels so good. And it's fun," he said. Then he changed the subject, moved onto something about sperm and ejaculation.
I already knew about it of course. Kids hear things. We talk. And joke. But I had never really tried it.
I did that night.
Mr. Cooper was right.
It did feel good. And it was fun.
So I knew about sex. I knew about masturbation. I knew about orgasms.
And I'm a curious kid. And we have the internet.
So, pretty quickly I knew about ejaculating, and sperm, and sucking.
And I knew what I liked thinking about, and looking at, when I did it. I wasn't really sure I was gay. I wasn't thinking that far ahead. I just knew what I liked. So that's what I thought about.
But tonight, for the first time, I thought about Mike.
Up. Down, I stroked.
I tried to keep my hand from going too fast. I wanted this to last. It felt so nice.
So incredibly nice.
I thought of his hand.
I thought of how it moved closer and closer to my boxers. To my dick.
I imagined it moving underneath the leg of my boxers. Me not stopping him this time.
I imagined how nice it felt. His warm hand. Rubbing. The anticipation.
I thought about the hard lump under my butt.
I imagined his fingertip touching my dick.
I stopped stroking. I just held my penis. It was so, so, hard. Even just holding it felt nice. I could feel it throbbing ever so slightly with my pulse.
I thought about what he said. I thought about how he came up here, and told me what was going on. So completely straightforward.
I liked that. A lot.
So, I made a decision. Just like that.
I threw my covers back and stood up.
My hard dick was sticking straight out through the fly in my boxers. I looked at it and grinned, then maneuvered it back inside and did up the button on the fly.
I went downstairs.
"Mike?" I asked, standing in the living room doorway.
I startled him. He must not have heard me come down.
He jumped a bit, half lying and half sitting on the couch, then turned his head to look at me.
"Yeah, kiddo?" he asked.
"I have more questions." I said, walking towards him.
"Okay, Donny. Let's talk."
I climbed up on his lap. Exactly where I had been before. Exactly the same.
The movie was still playing on the TV. Mike hit the mute button on the remote.
"Why does everyone say it's wrong?" I asked.
At the exact same time, I picked up his left hand with my own, and placed it on my leg. Halfway between my knee and the bottom of my boxers. I kept my hand on top of his, so he wouldn't take his hand away.
It felt nice.
"Sex?" he asked. I think before he really thought about it.
I could feel him tense up behind me. As well as his hand on my leg, though he didn't try and pull it away.
"Yeah. Well, kinda. I know sex isn't always wrong," I said.
He breathed out noisily. I could feel him relax a bit as he thought of his answer.
"You're right. Sex isn't wrong. But how and when and who it's with can be wrong."
I frowned. "What do you mean?" I asked.
At the same time, I began to push his hand in little circles on my leg. Hoping he'd get the idea.
"Well, it's complicat....No. Sorry. You deserve better than that." He thought about it. His hand started doing its circles on my thigh, now without me having to push it.
That's what I wanted. It was nice.
"Lots of things can be wrong if they're done in the wrong way, or the wrong place, or with the wrong people. But they can be right otherwise."
"Like what?" I asked, watching his hand doing its circles. It felt so nice.
"Well, say like eating. Eating isn't wrong. In fact, it's necessary. But if all you eat is junk food, then that's wrong. 'Cause you'd be sick. Or eating in math class. That's wrong. But eating in the lunch room. That's okay. Or, eating with your mouth open. That's wrong, 'cause it's disgusting."
"But sex isn't like eating."
His hand slowed down as he tried to think of his answer. I made sure he knew how I felt about that when I put my hand on his and started pushing it in circles again. I nudged it a bit higher.
"Well, no. Sex is wrong when someone is forced into it, or tricked into it, or doesn't understand what they're getting into, or when it's used as a way to try and control or manipulate someone. Or when it's selfish."
His hand stopped again. I didn't like that. I firmly grabbed it and moved it in circles before letting go again. He resisted for a half-second. But then started rubbing again.
That was better.
"Okay, I know that. Like rape and stuff," I said. "But why does everyone get so freaked out about stuff like what we talked about? Adults? And kids?"
My dick was hard now. I couldn't help it. His hand felt so nice. It was pretty obviously tenting my boxer shorts.
I could see him looking down at it. Then I could feel the lump grow under my butt.
I liked that.
"Because kids are still growing up. Because sex is real strong. Real powerful feelings. Kids haven't learned how to deal with those. Because adults have power over kids, so it's almost impossible for it to be equal. Sex should be equal."
I could see his eyes utterly locked on the front of my boxers. I don't think he could look away if he tried. I smiled to myself. I think I knew what he meant.
"You mean because kids will start to have power over adults," I said, thinking about how his eyes couldn't seem to look anywhere else.
He laughed then, and finally looked up into my eyes. "No. Well, yes, I suppose. But that's not what I meant. I meant that adults have power over kids. Almost always. And they almost always know more. So it's easy for them to trick or manipulate them into doing things."
His eyes went back to the front of my boxers. "And sex is strong. It can mess with your head. Kids aren't usually ready for those feelings yet."
"Oh," I said. Then I thought of something. "So, then, if kids aren't ready for those feelings, then they shouldn't have them? They should avoid them?"
"Yeah..." he said. Hesitantly. He knew he was walking into a trap of some kind.
"So, then, kids probably shouldn't be allowed to get angry then. 'Cause they often yell or tantrum. Or throw things. And kids probably shouldn't be allowed to get too excited. Because they can't sit still and then smile and giggle too much. And I guess they shouldn't be allowed to...."
"Nice try, Donny," he said, interrupting. "Not quite though. That's different. Kids need to learn how to control themselves."
I felt triumphant. He walked right into it. "So, then, this shouldn't be any different. Just like when I get mad. Like you said. I need to learn what to do with it. Learn from it, and don't let it control me. Make a good, conscious decision."
At the exact same time I said the last sentence, I pushed his left hand. Hard. Right up over my boxers. Onto my very stiff dick. I kept my hand hard on top of his, not letting him pull it away. I could feel him tense. Then slowly relax. Leaving it there, but not moving it otherwise.
"Donny...." he said, with exasperation.
I turned my head and looked into his eyes. I grinned cheekily. "Yeah?" I asked.
"You're entirely too smart for your own good, you know that?"
I wiggled my eyebrows at him.
"But that's not quite right. See. Even if everything you just said was true, and it isn't, in our culture, in this time, it's considered wrong. Very wrong. One of the most wrong things there is."
"So?" I asked.
"So, we live in this culture. You already know this part. We've talked about it. Some laws are stupid, or worse. But, we go along with them. Because otherwise we wouldn't have society."
"But you also say that some laws should be fought against. And that some laws should be ignored."
He wasn't giving up. Fortunately, he didn't try and take his hand off my dick either. Though he wasn't rubbing. I'd have to do something about that.
"Maybe, but I also have told you, again and again, we have to very carefully pick our battles. This isn't one that's winnable. It's very, very dangerous to even play."
I used my hand, still on top of his, to gently push it up and down. He didn't really resist. But he still didn't start moving his hand on his own either.
That wasn't what I wanted. So I did it harder, firmly pushing his hand. Up. Down.
He finally got the idea. Or rather, he finally relented. I already knew he had the idea. He began slowly moving his hand.
His hand was open, palm down. The palm was resting on my dick, which was very stiff, and lying flat, up towards my belly button.
He pushed, with just the right amount of pressure, and moved his hand.
I shivered. It felt so nice. I sighed. I felt the lump under my butt twitch.
I wiggled my butt a bit, just to see.
The lump flexed and twitched more. That was nice.
He stopped moving his hand, and started talking again. "Donny," he said, "we can't do this. It's not right. It's too dangerous. And I don't want to do anything to hurt you."
I liked the hand. And the lump. But I was getting a bit tired of the talking. So I tried to figure out a way to stop it. And I came up with a crazy way.
I turned my head, bent it towards his, and planted my lips right on his.
I didn't pull back either. Instead, I just moved my lips around.
I surprised him. I know I did. I could feel it.
But again, he didn't stop me. He didn't pull back. He even started to kiss back. I could feel his lips move against mine. Then, I could feel something else.
His tongue. Pushing against my lips.
I opened my mouth. His tongue came in. And pushed against mine.
He suddenly tensed, and pulled back.
"Dammit, Donny. No. We can't!"
Fuck! I was so horny now. I wasn't about to let him stop. He couldn't! It wouldn't be fair! I wiggled around some more, making sure the lump was right between my butt cheeks. Then I flexed them, squeezing the lump as best I could. I was staring right into his eyes when I did this.
He sighed. "I should stop you. I know I should. I need to." He hesitated. "But, I'm not man enough to do it." He leaned forward.
Our lips met again. This time, I was ready. My mouth was already open. Our tongues mashed together, twisting against each other.
No wonder kissing was so popular. Wow.
He was wrong anyway. He was man enough. He was more manly than any man I knew. Anywhere. I kissed harder, to prove it. I wiggled my butt again, and was rewarded with more twitching. And a definite little push! He was almost humping me.
His hand wasn't still anymore. In fact, it was moving up. Above the elastic waistband of my boxers, then pushing in, underneath.
He was going to do it. He was going to touch my dick.
My penis throbbed. I could feel the heat from his hand, creeping closer.
Contact! His fingertips touched the side of my shaft. Oh, wow. It was so nice. But he didn't stop there. His hand kept moving, then his fingers circled around my shaft. He began stroking it slowly.
It was so much nicer than when I did it. The feelings were indescribable. My dick was so, so sensitive.
I shifted, over to one side. Still kissing him, I reached down with a hand, placing it directly on his penis. I could feel it, hard and hot, sitting kind of sideways and cramped up in his jeans.
He seemed to like that.
I knew that because he said, in the middle of the kiss, "Oh, Donny. That feels so nice."
It pulsed a bit. I felt sorry for him. It seemed so confined in his jeans.
I figured I should do something about that.
I reached up my hand, and pulled on his button, expecting him to stop me.
He didn't. The button popped open. I reached for his fly.
His hand was moving downwards now, rubbing my balls. First he rolled the left one around in his finger, very gently. Then the right one. Then he used his palm to rub them both at the same time, the upper part of his hand rubbing the shaft of my dick.
His fingers curled a bit, touching underneath my balls, the skin right below my balls between my butthole and my sack.
I hadn't realized that spot was so sensitive. It felt wonderful.
I got his fly down. I pulled it wide, seeing the lump pushing his boxers out. I put my hand directly on it, now just a thin bit of cloth between my hand and Mike's dick.
I was almost touching Mike's dick! And it was hot. And hard. And he was rubbing mine.
I couldn't believe it.
I shifted again, pulling on the sides of his jeans.
Not only didn't he resist, this time he helped me. The lifted his butt a bit and helped me pull them down. Together, we got them down to his knees, where he then pushed them off the rest of the way. He was only wearing a thin t-shirt now, and his boxers.
I rubbed his dick. He moaned, and gasped a bit, then leaned in for another kiss.
I kissed him. And then moved my hand inside his boxers.
Now I was actually doing it.
I was actually touching his dick.
It was hot. And hard. And smooth. And wonderful.
I put my hand around it. My fingers barely met on the other side. It was so much bigger than my own. I moved my hand up and down. The way I did to myself. The way he was doing to me.
He seemed to like it just as much as I did. He shuddered a bit.
I pulled my hand out and onto the side of his boxers, now trying to pull them down.
Again he helped. We got them down too. And off.
Now he was naked. Except for his t-shirt.
I could see it all. His big hard cock. His big balls, a bit hairy and so sexy looking. The hair above his dick, all curly and sexy.
I took hold of his dick again and began stroking.
Now he pushed my boxers down. And I helped. A few seconds later I was naked too.
He looked down at me.
"Oh, Donny. You're incredible. So incredible," he said.
I smiled at him. That made me feel so nice. I continued stroking his big penis. I was watching myself do it now, enjoying the feel of his hands once again. One rubbing my dick, the other rubbing in sensuous circles all over my butt.
I looked at his dick, a few inches from my face, my hand on it, rubbing. I wondered if he'd let me. I wanted to do it. I'd thought about it for a long time, ever since I first saw those pictures.
I wasn't sure though.
I knew he wouldn't be mad. Mike just wasn't like that. The worst he would do would be to stop me and then explain why. So I figured I'd try it.
I moved my head. This time towards his penis.
I opened my mouth.
I heard him gasp.
I felt my lips touch his cockhead. And my tongue. I moved it experimentally. It didn't taste bad.
It tasted good. At least I thought so. It tasted like Mike smelled. Strong and manly. And sexy.
I pushed my mouth deeper on his dick and rubbed my tongue all over. I didn't want to nick him with my teeth, I figured that would hurt, so I was careful.
"Oh, Donny. I can't believe this. I can't believe you're doing that."
I could. It was blowing my mind though.
I was having sex! With Mike! Wow.
I was really, really doing it.
His fingers were still working on me. They moved a bit lower now. Right on my butthole.
I shuddered a bit. It felt so intense.
He quickly moved his hand away. I think he was worried. He must have thought my reaction was something else.
I grabbed his hand, with my mouth still on his dick, and shoved his hand right back where it was. Right back on my butt. Right back on my hole.
He got the message.
He rubbed it gently.
It was wild.
My lips and tongue were getting a bit tired, but I wasn't about to stop. I was having way too much fun.
His finger tried to push in a bit.
I thought of something.
I stood up suddenly. He looked a bit scared for a second, but I just grinned cheekily at him. "Be right back," I said.
I ran upstairs. He watched me, looking curious.
Or maybe he was just watching my butt.
I tried to wiggle it a bit just in case, while climbing the stairs.
I ran into my mom's room and opened her drawer. There it was. Right where it always was. I should know, I had borrowed it often enough while trying things. Things I had learned from the internet.
I grabbed the tube of KY and ran back downstairs. Holding it out in front of me to show Mike. I grinned like it was the grand prize at the carnival.
He looked shocked. Then he laughed.
"I underestimated you, kiddo. I should know better by now."
I climbed back onto him and opened the tube. I grabbed his hand and squeezed a bit of the clear jelly onto his fingers. Then I pushed his hand back where I wanted it. Right onto my hole.
Once he had it where I wanted it, he started gently pushing and twisting. I spread my legs a bit wider. To make it easier.
Then I put his dick back in my mouth.
He pushed his slick finger inside me now. Right up my butt. He was moving it around. In and out, and back and forth. Still being real gentle.
I moaned a bit. He touched that thing up inside me that I liked. It was so much better than when I did it.
His other hand moved back onto my dick. It was slimy now too. He must have got some KY on it. That felt good.
"If you don't stop sucking I'm going to cum," he said.
I didn't want that. Not yet. So I stopped. I looked up at him and smiled proudly. I was happy. I made him feel so nice.
He chuckled at my proud grin. I kissed him again. His tongue immediately entered my mouth. I let it.
A tiny part of me was wondering about all of this. About everything he said, what we talked about. I wondered if he was thinking the same way.
I guessed that he was.
But I pushed those thoughts down. This was just way too hot. Way too much fun. I'd think about all that later.
Right now I wanted more of this.
I had never imagined in all of my wildest dreams that I would be doing this tonight. Especially not with Mike.
He pushed me down on my back and moved around. I watched him. I knew where this was going. His head moved down over my groin.
He held my dick straight up, right at the hairless base, between his fingers.
Then he moved his mouth down. Right onto it.
It was warm. It was wet. It was wonderful. His tongue glided around my cockhead and down the shaft. His lips rubbed and sucked.
It was heaven.
His other hand wasn't idle either.
He had removed his finger and applied more KY. Now it was back. This time, after one was in nicely, I could feel him press in. With two.
I tried to keep my hole relaxed. His sucking mouth on my dick wasn't hurting either.
The finger entered. Now he was twisting and pushing in and out with two. His mouth was rubbing and sucking, sometimes down on my balls, then back on my dick.
It was amazing. I would have never believed it. I couldn't imagine it could be this awesome.
I felt so loved, so much the center of attention. Like I was the only thing that mattered.
I felt the feeling come on me fast. His fingers brushed over that spot again. Inside me. Then it happened.
I had one of those things. Orgasms.
It was the hardest one ever. The biggest one of my life.
I grunted and moaned. "Oh...oh, oh," I said.
I could feel my dick pump and flex, though of course nothing came out. I knew something would come out of his though. When he came.
I was getting a real nice idea about where I wanted that to happen.
I was going to try. I knew I probably would never get another chance. It was probably only circumstances that led things to go this far. I doubt he'd ever let it happen again. So I had to take advantage.
I knew it would hurt though. My mom's vibrator was proof enough of that. I didn't care. I wanted to try it. And I wanted it to happen with someone I liked. With someone I trusted.
With someone I loved.
I felt around with my hand until I found the tube of KY. I squirted a whole bunch on my fingers and hand, then reached around again. For his penis.
He had stopped sucking me. I think he knew my dick was real sensitive now. His fingers were still up my butt though. Still working themselves in and out.
As soon as he felt my KY covered hands he gasped and shuddered.
"Donny..." he said.
I knew what he was thinking.
He knew what I was thinking.
I moved around quickly. I turned over. Onto my front. Kind of propped onto my knees and elbows. My butt facing his dick. He was lying sideways. I was still holding his dick. I pulled it gently. Towards my ass. His slick KY covered dick slid through my hands.
I interrupted him though, "Because. Because I want to. Because I love you."
"But you..." he said.
I interrupted again, "And because you love me."
I said it matter of factly. Like it was obvious. Because it was obvious. Even though he had never said those words to me before.
I still knew it was true.
"Yes, Donny. Yes. I do love you."
I knew it! I felt a surge of elation.
And I felt him move around, behind me.
He was going to do it.
Oh my god. He was.
He was going to fuck me.
I could feel him move closer behind me. His fingers came out of my butt. I turned my head around to look. He was applying more KY to his cock.
Then he moved forwards.
His dick touched me. Right there.
Right on my hole.
I tried to relax. I tried hard. I really wanted this. I didn't want to blow it by getting all tense so he couldn't get it in.
I knew it would hurt. At first. But I knew it would go in. I had learned. From my experimenting.
I was determined to not let him know that. If it hurt. When it hurt.
He pushed. Slightly.
I knew that wouldn't do it. He'd have to push a lot harder than that.
I pushed back.
He got the idea. He pushed harder. I kept relaxed, and pushed out a bit, like I had learned worked with my toys.
I felt it start to spread my hole. I felt the tip start to penetrate.
He kept pushing.
I kept pushing back.
Then it happened.
Almost too suddenly.
The head of his cock popped in. behind my ring.
I tried not to. I really did. But I couldn't help it.
It hurt, dammit.
I felt him try and pull back.
I grabbed him from behind. And held tight.
"Don't you dare," I said.
He wanted to answer. I know he did. But I pushed back against him first. Before he could. Even though it still hurt.
His dick moved inside slightly more.
I was sweating now. And breathing really fast. I worked hard to stay relaxed.
He waited. Absolutely still. But at least he didn't try and pull it out.
After a minute I started to relax a bit. I nodded slightly. And pushed back again.
He got the idea.
He pushed in. Just a bit. Then back out. Then in a bit more.
His dick was deep enough now. His head rubbed me. Against the spot.
I think that turned him on. He pushed harder.
It was a bit easier now. It still hurt though. But the feeling was good too. The feeling from his dick rubbing against the spot. It overwhelmed the hurt.
And the hurt was going away.
He kept pushing. Pumping now.
I pushed back. Soon I felt his hairs on my butt. Then skin.
He was in.
All the way.
Holy shit. Mike's cock was all the way up my butt. He was fucking my ass. Right here. Right now. Mike was fucking me.
What a mind blower.
"Are you okay, buddy?" he asked.
I grunted, then said, "Fuck me, Mike. Just do it."
I think he liked that.
He fucked me.
Gently at first. Kind of slowly. Then, with my urging, faster. And harder.
We had a nice rhythm going. I felt the feeling start. My dick was limp though. It didn't matter. The feeling came, and it came fast.
I started grunting. And moaning. "Oh, Mike," I said. "Oh!.....oh, oh, oh."
I had another orgasm.
And I thought the first one was good.
It was nothing compared to this.
I saw stars. I heard white noise. My heart hammered. I felt the pulsing. Deep inside me this time. Deep where Mike's cock was making me feel so full. So wonderful.
He must have felt it happen. He was really pumping now.
"Oh, Donny. Oh, I can't believe this. Oh, Donny!" he yelled. He pumped in real hard. One last time. His pubic bone right up hard against my butt. He held me there while I could feel his cock jump. I could feel it. He was cumming.
He was spurting his stuff right up inside me.
My favorite uncle had his dick up my ass. And he was cumming. Hard. Right into my butt. His sperm was spurting right into me.
I felt him push one last time. Then I could feel him relax slightly.
We both caught our breath.
He then slowly, carefully, pulled his softening cock out.
I felt empty.
Cum dripped out. I farted, and more dripped out.
I had no idea it was so messy. Not like the internet stuff I'd seen.
I didn't care though. Except I didn't want to get more on the couch, so I grabbed my boxers and wiped up what was there, then held them to my ass.
Mike had a funny look on his face.
I didn't want him to get all weird on me though. So before he could start the big talk again, I leaned in to stop it. By kissing him.
It worked. Again.
I moved my lips back and grinned at him. "You fucked me," I said.
I saw his shocked look turn into a grin. "Yes, Donny. Yes. I don't believe it. But I fucked you."
I kissed him again.
Then, feeling the need, and still holding the dirty boxers against my ass, I ran to the bathroom. It needed to come out, and I needed to clean up.
I came out a few minutes later.
I walked back into the living room, and grinned at Mike.
I was really sore. But I was so proud of myself.
But Mike was looking a bit weird still.
So, I sat down. On his lap. Still naked.
And I kissed him.
And I kissed and kissed and kissed.
Finally, he pulled back.
"You know, Donny," he said. "That was amazing. Incredible. You're incredible. The most incredible boy ever. And I love you. More than I can say.
"But. You know. We can't do that again. We just can't. Though it won't change anything. Don't worry. I won't let it."
I just nodded. I knew he was going to say that. I had thought about it while I was still in the bathroom.
I answered, "I know. I understand." I kissed him. "We won't do it again." I kissed him again.
"Until tomorrow." And I leaned in for a really long, hard kiss. Cutting off any possible response.
I felt him laugh right in the middle of the kiss. But he kept kissing back.
I felt the lump below my naked butt get a bit bigger again.
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