Date: Sat, 01 Oct 2005 22:34:32 -0700 From: fritz@nehalemtel.net Subject: I Love Corey, Chapter Sixty-seven I apologize for coming back. I know you are tired of these warnings but I need to write another chapter and that means another warning. So, I suppose I'd better start by warning you that the following story may be offensive to those who disapprove of sex acts between males. Why I should have to do that is beyond me because anyone at this site probably already knows that most of the stories are of the type that might contain such horrid things. For those that don't know that, leave before you are sorely offended. This is your only warning. Secondly, for those of you, who are under the age of eighteen, please leave before you get in trouble. I refuse to be responsible for your problems if you disregard this warning. Next, there are areas in which the reading of this, and similar stories, is against the law. Since it is not my intention to turn you into a criminal, leave before you are caught. If you choose not to leave, at least be very careful. I suggest hiding in the closet and reading it by the aid of a flashlight if you can't get your monitor in there with you. By the way, those LED flashlights will cut down on the battery cost. I suppose you could get one of those flashlights you shake, but that would probably leave your arm too tired for other things. You wouldn't want that, would you? The following story has no basis in reality. The characters do not exist and neither do the events depicted. The whole thing is the product of an over-active imagination. If you believe otherwise, I have a bridge I will sell you because you appear very gullible. Please respect my ownership of the story. Credit me for any quotes you use and don't post it elsewhere without my permission. It is posted on Nifty for your personal enjoyment and as long as it is not used in a commercial manner, you are free to read and enjoy it. If that requires printing it out, feel free to do so. My many thanks to Don for his proofreading. I just wish I could do a better job so he didn't have to work so hard. If you have any questions about the story, feel free to write and ask them. You are also free to make comments, offer objections, or just generally rant. Just send them to fritz@nehalemtel.net I try to answer all such emails. Be sure to put "I Love Corey" in the subject line so you are not deleted. You may also request to be placed on the chapter notification list. With all that said, I hope you enjoy the following chapter. Fritz ******************************************************************************** I Love Corey, Chapter sixty-seven I had no more than gotten into bed and was just leaning over to kiss Corey when my cell phone started chirping at me. Talk about startled, no one ever called at this time of night. I was almost afraid to pick it up. I needn't have worried though; it was Steve Marshall inviting us all to breakfast. He apologized for not doing it sooner, but with all the people milling around at the party, he had simply forgotten until after we had left. Then he couldn't call me until he got home and looked up my cell number. We chatted a couple of minutes and he suggested we show up about ten and we could have a late breakfast. Aaron wanted to cook breakfast for all of us. He assured me there was plenty of room for the pickup and trailer to be parked in front of their house and gave what sounded like easy directions to get there. Just before he hung up he said to show up anytime we wanted, but be sure to be there by ten if we wanted to eat. I assured him we would be there before ten and with that we said goodnight. I was somewhat surprised, but since it was a free breakfast, it sounded like a good idea to me. With that thought I snuggled with Corey and soon fell asleep. I could even sleep in. It's horrid to be such a creature of habit. Even though it had been late when I finally made it to bed, about the usual time I woke up. My bladder must have some kind of timer attached to it. Not so with the boys. They never even stirred while I fixed some coffee and took Dog for his morning walk. I managed to find a newspaper box and picked one up and staggered back to the trailer. Then I encountered another problem. There was no place to sit. Until some of the boys got up and we could put the beds away, all I could do was sit on the floor and read the paper. Dog was happy flaked out along side of me, at least I think he was. He groaned every time I reached out and scratched his belly and he made no effort to move away from me. Somehow I got a certain satisfaction out of scratching him. He was always happy to see us and just seemed to want to be loved. Dog made me wish I'd had a pet when I was growing up. He made no judgments; he just accepted and loved all of us. If people could be more like dogs I suspect the world would be a better place. Mark finally woke up and Corey wasn't far behind him. Since none of us had anyplace to sit, it was time to get the rest of the boys up. By now it was almost eight. You know, it's amazing what the knowledge that no food would be available until they were up and dressed can do to sleepy boys. I don't think I ever saw them so organized and moving that quickly before. I had told them about the call, well actually I'd just yelled from the bedroom after I got it, and they knew there would be nothing to eat until after the trailer was picked up, hooked up, and then driven up the road a few miles. Even Kyle was helping and normally he was slower than a three-toed sloth in the morning. In fact, they chased me out of the trailer so they could get everything put away. Dog acted nervous from all the activity and went with me. I did manage to rescue another cup of coffee on the way out. We were headed to the office to check out just before nine and I had even emptied the holding tanks. We were about a half hour early for breakfast. The directions were perfect and Steve had been right about the parking. I could have parked several trailers in front of their house. The house set back from the road and had a great big horseshoe driveway. It was probably an old farmhouse from the 1920s or so. It was a two-story house with clapboard siding and had a big chimney, which was probably for a fireplace. It looked pretty impressive. In fact, knowing that property was so valuable in the area, I was surprised that they had a place like it. There were even a couple of big oaks for shade. All in all it looked like a comfortable place to live. Steve answered the door and almost drug us in. He had a big grin. Before I even really had a chance to say hello, he was busy thanking me for finding him and putting him in contact with his father. He went on so long with it, telling me how he had been so angry with his father and how he had vowed never to have anything to do with him that I was beginning to get a little uncomfortable. He even told me that he had almost refused to take a chance and come up to meet with his father but told me that something about the way I had talked with him, that first day, had finally convinced him to take a chance. The way he was bubbling over told me that he was happy he had. About the time Steve ran down it was Aaron's turn. I swear I don't understand sometimes. I didn't have anything to do with getting Aaron and his brother together. Yet to listen to Aaron you would think I planned the whole thing. I kept trying to point out that it was really just one of those fortunate co-incidences that sometimes happen. Sure, Rob had mentioned that he wished he knew where his brother was, but never in my wildest imagination had I thought about Aaron. At the time I really didn't really know either of them and Rob had never mentioned his brother again. Arranging a job for Rob had been one of those things that just seemed right. It helped several people and really didn't cost me much. Mr. and Mrs. Downie had needed more help and Rob had needed a job. It had even worked out to where Lee seemed happy and in the end, that was what was important. I kept trying to convince them of that but didn't seem to have much success. Finally we wandered back to the kitchen. After all, there were hungry boys to fill up, like seven of them. People always amaze me. Aaron was complaining that he couldn't make good hotcakes and he had a package of mix. I could have told him that was his problem but it didn't seem like the right thing to do. He very carefully measured things out and of course it made the type of batter that produced hotcakes I really dislike. You know the kind; the batter was so thick that the hotcakes would also be thick. That meant that the outside would be dry and tough and the inside stood a good chance of being undercooked and doughy. If you cooked the outside to a nice golden brown, the inside would be raw. If you got the inside done, the outside would be a real dark brown and tough. Add to that the odd flavor that always seems to accompany hotcake mixes and I was less than thrilled. Still they were trying to be nice and I figured we could survive on mix hotcakes. Then I noticed a container of a certain well-know syrup. I won't say the name but it has a female honorific in it. It certainly doesn't taste like maple syrup. About all I can say is it is sweet and, like the ads say, it is a little thicker than some of the other brands. I simply hate it, and I never have noticed any butter flavor in it either. The fact that Steve was nuking the bacon didn't help either. My experience had taught me that the microwave produced tough, dry bacon. Either that or it was limp and greasy. Steve seemed intent on producing the dry, tough kind. Ah well, I was sure I would survive the breakfast. By now we were talking about the party last night. I commented on how good the wine was and got some snickers from the various boys. The boys were finally forced to tell Steve that Derrick had smuggled them some of the wine. About then Corey started commenting on some of the properties of the Chianti we had been served. Then JJ and LT joined in. The three of them did a pretty good job of critiquing the wine. They made comments about raspberries, vanilla, oak, and balance along with some hints of flowers about the wine. Steve seemed more than a little surprised over that and I wondered if the discussions, held over the wines I served with the meals at home, were turning the boys into wine snobs. They certainly were getting good at picking up all the good and bad points of various wines. The boys were just getting warmed up. They started talking about dancing and how much fun they'd had. Kyle and Mark didn't say much but the rest of them were now chattering like a bunch of magpies. They didn't shut up until breakfast was served. It was six to four on the breakfast. Corey, JJ, LT, and I didn't really eat that much. The rest just gobbled it down. About all you could do with the bacon was break it into little chunks. You couldn't really chew it up. A little salt and pepper made the eggs good, but then there were the hotcakes. Not only were they tough on the outside, they were slightly doughy on the inside. I didn't eat many of them. I really hoped that Mrs. Sterrett would have a good dinner. Breakfast was over and Jamall and Trevor led the boys off somewhere. Aaron and Steve handed me a cup of coffee and we settled back to visit. I filled them in on Derrick's flirting with the boys and how they had enjoyed it. One thing led to another and before long I learned that the reason Aaron did the books for the restaurant was that he was an old friend of Kirk Chambers. They had met soon after Aaron had moved to the area. I also learned a lot about both Kirk and, his partner, Dick Thompson. One of the surprising things I learned was that the building that housed the restaurant was up for sale. Kirk and his partner were worried what would happen if and when it was sold. While the restaurant was doing pretty well, they had gone in debt to start it and were just now getting that debt paid down. They were both worried that if it sold, they might have to find a new place for their restaurant. Aaron didn't know all the details but there was more than just the restaurant building involved. The conversation drifted on to other things and I learned a little more about both Steve and Aaron. Steve sometimes gave organ lessons and both were active in various civic activities. I did learn that the reason they had the home they were living in was they had taken care of a gentleman who had passed away from AIDS, and he had left it to them. They didn't say all that much about him but what little they did say convinced me that they both loved him. However it didn't appear that they had been lovers or anything like that, more like they had been dear friends. I figured if they wanted me to know more, someday they would tell me. We swapped stories about raising boys and how said boys seemed to think they could pull the wool over our eyes. That produced a couple of interesting stories and some chuckling on our parts. The time just seemed to fly and soon we had to leave if we were going to make it back home in time to go to dinner. I managed to round the boys up and we all thanked Steve and Aaron for the breakfast. Then it was off for home. I got some real complaints about the breakfast from Corey and LT. JJ was a little more inclined to let it go but you could tell he hadn't been impressed with it. I did point out that it was the thought that mattered, rather than the quality of the food. Besides it wasn't that bad, just not very good. The conversation turned again to the party. Corey asked if I had known it was a party and I told him that I hadn't. I was as surprised as anyone when I found out that it was. The boys mentioned the other young people that Derrick had introduced them too and commented on how much fun it had been. I still wished I had been able to dance with Corey but even if I had really noticed what was going on, I'm not sure I would have. I was still in such a defensive mode when it came to him that I'm not sure I would have been able to do so, no matter how much I wanted to. Mark made some comments but Kyle seemed lost in thought. I really wondered what he thought of the whole weekend and hoped that one day he might feel comfortable enough to talk about such things with me, but he still seemed afraid to say anything. Steve and Aaron had suggested that we cut across country and hit Interstate 5 at Williams. The first part of the trip made me wonder if that was such a good idea. The road was very crooked and not real smooth. It went up at a pretty good grade and when we got to the top, down the same way. However the directions they had given seemed to be correct because I kept getting to the places they told me to turn at so I kept driving, although not very fast. Even though the road wasn't much, the scenery was nice. After a while I got to a better road and that was a big improvement. While it wasn't equal to an interstate highway, the scenery was better and there wasn't all that much traffic. I'd never had any reason to travel that way before and we even stopped and took a few pictures. Dog enjoyed such stops as he got to get out of the back of the pickup and sniff around. The canopy had a sliding window, and so did the pickup, plus I had gotten one of those things that went between them so he could stick his head through and see what we were doing. I'd even rigged up a bed for him on top of a box at the front of the bed. That put him almost as high as the windows so it was easy for him to let us know if he needed to stop. I even noticed that LT would sometimes reach through and pet him. We found a Burger King in Williams and the boys quit bitching about being hungry. I shared mine with Dog and he seemed happy. Then it was back on the road towards home. While I had enjoyed the weekend, home sure looked good. I got the trailer backed into the new shop and the boys started carrying their new clothes to the house. Dog was frisky, running around and checking all of his yard to see if there were any new smells. We finally got the trailer unloaded and everything in the house. I was in luck. There were no messages on the answering machine so apparently nothing important had come up while we were away. Dog was thrilled to be back where he had his door to run in and out and, for a while, that thing was busy clicking and clacking as he kept checking his territory out. Even the boys seemed happy to be home and be able to just collapse in their usual chairs. Still we didn't have all that much time to enjoy it until we had to leave for the Sterretts'. The dinner was good but I think Mrs. Sterrett was surprised at the amount the boys ate. Still, Cody ate as much as anyone did. I would guess it was a tie between Kyle and him. While Kyle was bigger and a little older, Cody more than held up his end of the eating. Mrs. Sterrett had fried a couple of chickens and accompanied them with mashed potatoes and gravy. By the time it was over, the chickens were history and there wasn't enough potatoes left to feed an ant. The boys all had a somewhat bemused and contented expression. Then it was time to find out what questions Cody had. Cody seemed a little hesitant about saying anything as long as Kyle and Mark were there, but not so with the other three. Corey, LT, and JJ started trying to find out what he wanted to talk about. I never even got a chance to stick my oar in. They started out by asking him how things were going and it just went on from there. In a short while they had asked him if he was making any friends and how he liked the teachers. By the time he got those and other questions answered, he seemed to have gotten over some of his shyness. He did do a lot of blushing when they asked him about some of his classmates. They could have been a little more discrete but I suppose asking if he thought this one and that one were hot or had a cute butt ended up relaxing him. They also threw in such things as he might enjoy looking at this one and that one, but it wouldn't do him any good because they were straight. Finally the whole reason we came for the dinner finally came up. Cody wanted to know how to tell when someone was gay. His real problem was that he thought one boy was cute and wondered what to do about it. Then everyone turned to me as if I could answer the question. Jeez, I was expected to answer a question like that and I had to be one of the most Gaydar challenged people in the world. "I don't really know what to tell you Cody. I have no idea of Kenny's sexuality. I don't even know how to tell you to find out. I mean I wouldn't just go up and say something like I think you're cute and I'd like to jump your bones." That got a bunch of giggles out of them. I also noticed that Kyle seemed to be hanging on every word I said. "I suppose you need to figure out some way to find out if he is gay, or at least doesn't hate gays. The problem is that all the ways I can think of require being his friend first. If you were good friends with him, you could probably get an idea of how he might react." About that time JJ and LT stuck their two cents worth in. They explained that they had been friends for a long time and how JJ had used the magazines I had gotten for him to breach the subject. When JJ started to tell about some of the pictures in those magazines, I about died of embarrassment. I mean the Sterretts were sitting there listening to everything said. The fact that I would get, what would probably be considered pornographic magazines, for someone as young as JJ made me want to sneak off and hide. He certainly didn't need to be quite so graphic in his descriptions. When JJ said he finally felt like he could take a chance because LT liked the picture that had the guy with the big dick, I about suffered a heart attack. He said that LT kept going back to the picture and it was the only one in the magazine that showed much of the guy. All the rest had concentrated on the gals and only showed the guys' backs. It got even worse when LT giggled and said how big it looked. I wasn't the only one about to suffer a meltdown. The Sterretts looked about like I felt. However, the boys didn't seem to pay any attention to us. I knew that my boys were getting pretty comfortable around me but had no idea they were that comfortable. I was left with the thought that perhaps all those conversations with them had finally convinced them that they were just like other people and needn't be ashamed of who or what they were. The last few weeks they had been more than willing to talk about anything when we were eating dinner or in the hot tub, and had started treating me more like one of their classmates rather than their guardian. Tonight they just seemed to ignore the fact that any adults were present and went blithely on, telling Cody what they thought might work. What had started out to be a theoretical conversation had turned into something entirely different. They were also throwing in things like going to the Castro district and some of the things said at the party last night. I knew the boys all thought that Derrick was cute but had no idea he had influenced them that much. Apparently Derrick and his friends had told them a lot of things at the party. Still, I was stunned that they would be so open with me and the Sterretts listening in. I was embarrassed to tears yet proud that they were becoming comfortable enough to talk about things like their sexuality. I wanted to say many things but was afraid the Sterretts might take some of them wrong. Instead I was just frozen, wondering if my world was about to end. All I could hope for was that the Sterretts would not learn of Corey's and my relationship. I was afraid to interrupt the boys and afraid of what they might say. When the conversation got around to some of the boys who had a big packages, I thought I was going to black out. About that time there was a gasp from Mrs. Sterrett. Suddenly, it was like my boys finally realized there were other people in the room. They turned bright red and looked to me to bail them out. Fat chance, I was still in meltdown. I know I looked like some kind of fish that had been pulled from the water and was trying to get some water over its gills. My mouth was opening and closing and no words were coming out. Mr. Sterrett started to giggle. He pointed at me and the giggling got louder. I just wanted to die. I had never realized how badly kids could embarrass you. All I could do was hope I had never done anything like that to my parents. The other thought that raced through my mind was a wonder that more parents didn't kill their children. If I hadn't been so proud of them for trying to help Cody, I would have cheerfully strangled JJ, LT, and Corey. At least Kyle and Mark had kept their mouths shut. The giggling turned into some snorts and then some coughs. About then Mrs. Sterrett started to join him. All I could do was hang my head and try to sink into the chair. Unfortunately the chair wasn't co-operating so I just sat there with my head down. I thought that having the Sterretts' laugh was bad enough, but when Corey joined them, I could almost feel his scrawny little neck in my hands. The chair was still not willing to help me sink out of sight. After a period of giggling and laughing Mrs. Sterrett inquired if some more coffee would help. Bless her heart. At least it would give me a few more seconds to try to get myself back under control. However she ruined the whole thing by giggling some more when she re-filled my cup. Finally the giggling stopped and when I looked up, everyone was looking at me. I knew I had to say something, but I wasn't sure what. "Uhmm, ah Cody, ah maybe you ought to concentrate on making friends first." I was out of things to say and hoped someone would bail me out. No such luck. They all kept looking intently at me as if I was some kind of guru who would save the day. I certainly didn't feel like a guru. "I mean maybe, well maybe you won't like Kenny when you get to know him." I was floundering badly and no one seemed willing to help. I was still trying to think of something to say and my mind was shooting blanks. That is if it could still shoot. I could see from Cody's expression that he didn't think that was going to happen. He had a stubborn set to his face. "If you make friends with him, then maybe, well maybe you could try something like JJ did. I'm sure your Father would be happy to get you some magazines or whatever might be necessary." There was a sudden gasp and some choking from Mr. Sterrett's direction. It was followed by a bunch of coughing. My mind was starting to work a little and I decided to press the advantage. "If your Father won't do it, your Mother probably will." Now there was some more coughing and choking from that direction and it was somewhat higher pitched. Payback's hell. Cody was blushing, but he suddenly got a grin on his face. "Gee Dad, will you help me?" Just the way he said it you knew he was twisting the knife in the wound. He had a kind of pert, smug tone to his voice. Needless to say he got no answer, only some more coughing sounds from that area of the room. I couldn't bring myself to look in the Sterretts' direction. Those coughing sounds sounded almost strangled, so I decided to bail his parents out. "In the meantime I suggest you get better acquainted with Rosy Palm and her five sisters. When the time is right you can worry about more." Cody once again turned scarlet and the boys burst into laughter. I just eyeballed them. Their turn was coming. It was just a question of when. I knew they would screw up sometime and I could get back at them. My glare seemed to calm them down somewhat. In the meantime I wondered if it was safe to try for another sip of coffee. After a few seconds in which no one said anything I took a chance and picked up my cup. All the while my mind was racing, trying to figure out what to say. After a few sips I started in. "Look Cody, it isn't all about sex. I know a lot of people think it is and they think the gay community is all like that, all sex and no love. In many senses I think its society's fault. Too many people think that all gays think about is sex. Since there are no pregnancies to worry about, they think sex must be the only motivation. I think that far too many gays have fallen into that same type of thinking. Society doesn't seem to think that two homosexuals can have a meaningful relationship, and therefore doesn't help homosexuals form such a relationship. We all pretty much have a tendency to live up or down to whatever expectations are put upon us. If no one thinks you can do something, you soon start to feel you can't. I happen to think that sexual orientation makes little difference. In fact, the only difference I can see that it makes is in who you love. In all other things I happen to think that gays are just people. They have the same wants and needs as anyone else. They just happen to fall in love with people of their own sex. So, what I think you need to think about is what kind of boy you really want. It isn't just about looks but rather about the whole person. In fact, looks are probably the least important thing. You need to find someone whom you truly like as a friend and companion. Then there is plenty of time to worry about sex. While you're looking for that special someone you will just have to do what every other person does while looking, and that is, use your hand." I got another blush out of the last part of that statement. "What do you mean help form relationships?" Corey chimed in. "It isn't so much help, as it is encourage through expectations. People expect other people to be honest and that encourages honest behavior. Society expects people to obey the law and that encourages lawful behavior. Peer pressure has a tremendous effect on people. Society, as a whole, has certain expectations on straight couples, but doesn't seem to have those same expectations of homosexual couples. I think that perhaps that leaves gay couples wondering what they should do and how they should act. Take scholastic achievement for example. People don't seem to expect as much from blacks. You'll never convince me that they are not just as smart as anyone else on the average, but since society expects less of them scholastically, they fall to those expectations. Yet if you put those same students in a situation where they are expected to succeed, they rise to the challenge and do succeed. I think that if society applied the same standards to homosexuals, as they do to heterosexuals, we would find that there would be no more casual sex in the homosexual community than there is in the heterosexual community. Now understand, if you have expectations for people, you have to help them achieve those goals. By that I mean that in the scholastic field you have to have teachers that help the student, and parents that encourage the student. Yet the gay community is faced with discrimination and repressive laws in many instances. You have a bunch of right wing religious nuts running around telling everyone how bad and evil gays are and soon people start to wonder. That perception has its effect and soon gays start to wonder if they are as good as everyone else. Then the law doesn't help. You have to hire a lawyer and file a whole bunch of papers to even come close to enjoying some of the same protections and rights as heterosexuals. All these things have a negative effect on the gay community, and unfortunately the gay community has a tendency, much like any other minority, to fall to those expectations or standards. What you really need to understand is that you are just as good and deserving of happiness as anyone else." While I might have been answering Corey's question, I was directing the answer to Cody. In fact, when I glanced around everyone seemed to be listening and thinking about what I was saying. While I had said all these things to Corey, JJ, and LT, repeating them couldn't hurt. As for Cody, Kyle, and Mark, it was a start. Sometimes I felt like I was flogging a dead horse but positive reinforcement never hurts. As many times as I had made the same argument to Corey, there were still nights when he seemed to forget it and feel like he was less than other people. There was a pause and then things really took off. Suddenly all the boys were willing to talk, even Kyle to a more limited extent. The next hour and a half was spent explaining that not everyone has the same talents and abilities and we shouldn't expect to be as good at everything as some people were at one thing. I tried to point out that some people are athletes and others are scholars. Some people are good at working with people and others aren't. Still we all had things we were good at, even if we weren't the best in the world. That didn't mean we shouldn't try to be the best but we all had to understand that there could only be one person that was the best at any given thing. As long as a person really tried and did his best, that was all that could be expected. Kyle seemed to ask few questions but was really listening to what everyone was saying. Even the Sterretts got into it. Finally things started to slow down and I was beginning to think I was about done. Not so. The subject of other homosexuals came up, and the way it came up was Cody wondering if there was any way someone might help them like the boys and I were helping him. His point was that without us, he was becoming very depressed and might have done something stupid. He was worried that perhaps there was no one to help some other student get past the fear and loneliness. All of a sudden I had a whole bunch of people worried about that very thing. Not only that, they were also worried about how the parents accepted said students. After all, I had three boys who had not been well received when their sexuality was discovered. More of JJ's and LT's story came out and the Sterretts were horrified. They couldn't understand the boys' parents' reactions. As far as that went, neither could I. We kicked that around for a while and finally Kyle told us a little about what had happened to him. The more we talked about it, the more everyone wanted to do something about it. No one was quite sure what we could or should do, but everyone thought we should attempt to do something. However they cooled off when I pointed out that a lot of their suggestions would result in them coming out. While JJ and LT were pretty much out, even if they had never really told anyone, the rest of the boys were not yet ready to make such a step. We all agreed to think about it and see if we could come up with some kind of solution to the problem. I even invited the Sterretts over for dinner next Sunday to discuss it further. That would give everyone a little time to think things over. I was starting to be very impressed with Jill and Ron. If all parents of gay children were as accepting as they were, there would no longer be much of a problem. It was obvious they deeply loved Cody and I was pretty sure they would do anything they could to help him. Now all we had to do was figure out how to help anyone who needed it. No one said much on the way home. It was getting late, but I think we were all thinking about what might be a good idea and still be something that didn't create any more problems for anyone. While things seemed to have calmed down, there was still some resentment over JJ and LT. Fortunately it was restricted to a few and those few seemed to be afraid to do anything about their hatred. The way the Franklin Daniels affair had been handled seemed to make others a little more cautious. Also a lot of the students were starting to realize JJ and LT were no different than they had ever been. Some of those who had been afraid to be seen with them were now talking and joking with them just like nothing had ever happened. Unfortunately, those few, who hated had a tremendous impact of those who were gay. Simple statistics said there were more gay students in the school than those few I actually knew were gay. It didn't take a genius to understand that most young gay people were afraid to take a chance on coming out and exposing themselves to what someone in that group might do. It didn't just apply to young people. I was stuck in the same position. Coming out could have serious consequences for me. There were times I wanted to just be honest and tell everyone, and other times that the fear of doing so scared me. Judy had helped me come to terms with that somewhat, but I still wasn't happy with the whole thing. I'd seen percentages quoted that ranged from one percent to almost thirty percent. I was fairly sure both of those numbers were wrong, but what was the correct percentage? A commonly used figure was ten percent. My experience told me that percentage might be somewhat close to the truth, but even if it was lower, say seven percent, that meant that there had to be eighty-something gay students in the school. If the ten percent figure was accurate, then the number climbed to a hundred and twenty. The rest of the schools in the area would raise that number approximately fifty percent or so. That meant that there was a fair possibility that there might be close to two hundred gay students in the area. Of course a lot of them were too young to even think about sexual orientation. Still that left a substantial number and I wondered how many of those had any kind of support. This problem was going to take some more thought. I couldn't believe it. The boys decided that some popcorn would be a good snack. Three bags of microwave popcorn later and even Dog was satisfied. He managed to catch almost all of those kernels tossed his way. I was really impressed that he could keep track of five boys. No matter which one threw the popcorn, Dog rarely missed. Maybe I ought to sign him up for the baseball team. He appeared to be a better catch than most of the players. When I got into bed, Corey wanted to talk. He'd been pretty quite after the conversation at the Sterretts and I wondered what was on his mind. It didn't take long to find out. He was really wound up about the fact that there might be some students that didn't have any support or someone to talk with. As we talked more, suddenly things became a lot clearer. There had been times when I had some glimpses of how he had felt before we got together, but tonight he really laid it on me. He told of all his fears, like his mother not coming back or one of her boyfriends hurting him. His telling about the loneliness of not having any friends, partly from moving so often, and partly from his knowledge that he was different, scared me. In some of our previous conversations he had allowed me some glimpses of how depressed and worried he had been, but tonight I finally understood that had I not happened along, he probably would have just given up. That giving up part was what really frightened me. The dead tone of his voice told me just what he meant without words. In fact he had been trying to figure out just how to accomplish it when he was sitting there watching practice that first day I had met him. My little offer of the manager's job had been the only reason he had not killed himself. Even that had only been a delay in his plans. However, the thing that really surprised me was what that first dinner had meant to him. It wasn't just the dinner, it was the whole evening. Our later discussions of love and how much he meant to me had also helped. The one thing that really surprised me was that he felt my arranging his knee operation, and paying for part of it had finally convinced him that I truly loved him. That I would spend that much money on him clinched it in his mind. After that there were no more thoughts of suicide. No matter how I tried, I couldn't seem to convince him that money didn't matter, love did. I also learned how worried and scared he had been when LT first moved in. He had been afraid he was losing his place with me. The fact that I had told LT about our relationship had convinced him that I loved only him. Since then he had felt secure and happy. Well happy except for the worries he had about his mother. He sometimes cried when all this was pouring out. When the tears got too much, I kissed him and just held him tight. After a bit they would stop and he would go on. He finished up by saying we just had to do something. Neither of us could figure out just what that something was, but he was certain we had to do something. His reason was pretty simple. If he had felt that way, he wanted any person with similar feelings to have some one to talk with and get some help and support. Now it was just a matter of figuring out what to do and how to do it. To be continued... Ah hotcakes. I really don't know quite how to tell you to make hotcakes. Sure, I have a recipe I more or less follow, but there are too many variables to be accurate with it. However here goes. The basic recipe is pretty simple. 2 cups of flour 2 cups of buttermilk 2 tablespoons of melted butter 2 tablespoons sugar 2 eggs, separated 1 1/2 teaspoons baking soda 1 teaspoon salt Just put everything in a bowl, except for the eggs whites, and mix. I always use a whisk because that is the way I determine how thick the batter is. It will take more buttermilk than the recipe calls for. If you go to the trouble to sift the flour before measuring, it won't take much more, but it probably will take some. Since I'm much too lazy to do it that way, I just scoop a couple of cups of flour out and dump it in the sifter, along with the other dry ingredients. I want a fairly thin batter because I like my hotcakes more of a golden brown than a dark brown and I hate a doughy center. By using a thin batter I can get the center done without over browning them. The cooked hotcake should be just shy of or about 3/16 of an inch thick. Anyhow I usually end up adding about an extra half cup of buttermilk but that depends on just how accurate I was when measuring the flour. It also depends on what brand of buttermilk you use. Some are thicker than others and it takes a little more of them. Others are thin and require a little less. The brand I normally use is one of the thicker ones so bare that in mind. When the batter is about the right texture, beat the two egg whites to stiff, but not dry peaks, and fold them into the batter. Cook on a 375 degree lightly oiled griddle. Remember you can experiment a little. If the batter is too thick, add more buttermilk. If you get it a little thin, a little more flour will fix that. If you are feeling real lazy, or are in a hurry, just throw the whole eggs in and don't bother to whip the whites separately. And no, that doesn't mean to leave the eggs in their shells. They won't be quite as light fixed that way, but they are still good. Hotcakes are easy to make, but I had an aunt who was a horrible failure at them. In fact, she could ruin hotcake mix. She was normally a good cook but she never mastered the humble hotcake. It actually turned into a family joke. If any of the relatives were there, they had to make the hotcakes. I have no idea how many family members tried to teach her, but it was without success. She admitted that her hotcakes were terrible, but she never improved. About the only time my cousins got hotcakes was when someone showed up that was willing to make them. On the other hand she made excellent breads and rolls and her biscuits were pretty good. Things like roasts and gravies were to die for. Yet she went to her grave without ever making a hotcake that was fit to eat. She just could not bring herself to make the batter thin enough and the center was always a little under cooked, like almost raw. Ghastly things. However on the bright side, it didn't require many of her hotcakes to have people claim they were full and didn't care for any more. Most of those so-called full people managed to eat a big lunch, I mean really big.