Date: Fri, 26 Mar 2010 00:46:50 -0400
From: polevaulter973@aol.com
Subject: In My Heart- Part 2

Although Camille was nearly seventeen, and beginning to look like a young
man his mother didn't want for him to stay alone in their house while she
went on a eight-month trip to Europe to do some studying. I think it's safe
to say that she had no idea about the rift between us, although it
shouldn't have been hard to apprehend our lack of friendship; he use to
always stop by my house and we'd play video games or watch movies.

Camille's mother was in a rush I assume, because he was the one to explain
why he would be staying with me.

 "Yeah, uhh...you could just put your stuff, or whatever, in the spare
room," I gestured towards the room he use to sleep in whenever he slept
over my house. He gave me a small nod and avoided my eyes. I knew the right
thing to do would be to help him with his bags, but there was so much
distance between us, it cut off my ability to say anything meaningful.
After he went into his new room he only came out once during that day, and
that was to go to work I assume, since I heard he gotten a job at the local
market.

 The next day I decided that I would try and seal the gaping rift between
us, although I knew in reality that it would take much more time to heal
our lost friendship; I was twenty four years old, its about time I did
something mature. After he came home from work that day I asked him what he
wanted for dinner, however I was unable to decipher the muttered words he
spoke before he went into his room and closed the door. I sat at the
kitchen table, with anxiety eating the insides of my stomach. I had to say
something to him, if we were going to live together, we shouldn't avoid
each other like this; its childish. I walked to his door and grabbed the
handle and walked in ready to say my speech. But, there he was, with his
shirt almost halfway off. I was able to see a bit of his body, which had
matured with distinct muscles, although he was still slim. The speech I had
been prepared to say to him was now lost in a pool of thoughts; he was so
beautiful.

 When he pulled his shirt over his head and looked at me he blushed and I
was still staring. His embarrassed grin turned to a look of anger and I
felt my heart break; the torture he puts me through, I wonder if he
knew...I hoped not. He pulled his shirt close to his chest in attempt to
shield his nakedness.

"I uh -I uh-I..." and then I walked out the room. I couldn't do it. How
beautiful he was, how much he meant to me, how I had hurt him; how he had
hurt me! Before I could gather myself completely he stepped out of his room
with a plain white-t and grey sweats.

 "You wanted to talk I assume?" he said with a yawn. His nonchalant
attitude bewildered me for a second.

 "Yeah, look, we're going to be living together until your mother gets back
and whatever happened in the past I want to forget about it and I'm hoping
you will too, `cause I don't want this to be awkward."

 "Alright, is that it?" he said blankly.  I was pissed...I was at a loss of
words. What does he mean is that it? I guess that's it, yeah. NO! that
isn't it, why doesn't he have any interest, why isn't he smiling,
something...anything!

 "Camille..." I sighed and allowed myself to live with this demeanor, I
mean maybe it wont be that bad. We both went our separate ways; him back to
his room and me to the kitchen to cook dinner.

 I decided to make Mac and cheese, since I was so stressed with my emotions
and it was easy to make. I knocked on his door and gave him his plate of
Mac and cheese and I took my plate to the living room to watch some good
ol' TV. I dozed off watching television and I woke up to the sound of the
refrigerator opening. I lifted myself up a little with my arm and looked
over the couch and saw Camille getting some juice. I laid back down, only
to hear the sound of sniffling. He must've of heard my movement because his
eyes locked with mine, but he quickly looked away.

"Is everything alright?" He didn't respond. "Camille? What's wrong?" His
sorrow puzzled and pained me at the same time. I got up off the couch,
trying to cope with my still-asleep body. I stumbled over trying to reach
him, just seeing him makes my insides quiver and my movements
cumbersome. When I reached him, his body was shaking and I felt a pain in
my chest; seeing him like this made me hurt like nothing before. I turned
his body to face me so I could look at his face, but when I attempted to
turn his head to look at me he was resistant.

"Ugh, Camille? What's wrong? Talk to me, I'm here, please just talk to
me. I can help...Please?"

 I was practically begging for him to let me console him. He looked me in
the eyes at last and I saw his beautiful green eyes, except they lacked the
sparkle they use to have. His lips moved but it was as if he was mute...it
was all I could believe because the words I knew I heard him speak would be
too unbearable for me.

 "Can we go get some hot chocolate?" he asked unexpectedly.

"Sure...?" I said slightly confused. "Let me put on my shoes, you can go
turn on the car in the meantime and warm it up." I said starting to my
room. I found it odd that he would want to hang out? I suppose, for the
first time in two very long depressing years. In those two years there was
no other guy for me, it was all about work, work, work and Camille was
always somewhere in my head.


(TO BE CONTINUED)

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If you liked it let me know, any comments ? (: polevaulter973@aol.com