Date: Mon, 29 May 2000 12:16:14 EDT From: VicHowel@aol.com Subject: The Learning Season - chapter 3 The Learning Season - Chapter 3 - by Dave MacMillan 'Lo all. I'm doing my posting for June all in one lump. I hope a lot of you will be doing a whole lot of reading in the next few days. There's Growing Up Sexual in Young Friends (biweekly postings), Confessions of a Vampire in Scifi/Fan, and Gut Feelings in Beginnings. I'm also beginning a new novel - Learning To Fly - in college. I would love to hear from any and all of you - what you like, what you don't like, all of that stuff. Contact me at von Muribor@aol.com. %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% Rich Dailey sat across the restaurant table from the man he'd surrendered to only hours earlier. He saw Vic Marshall now with a new wonder, however - just as he viewed their sex as an act of love making. Before, Vic Marshall had been his friend's father and the man he was always fantasizing about before Ron starting giving him ideas that hadn't left him safe in his closet. Now, Vic was a man he had made love to and, later on, would make more love to. By morning, he would have given everything there was for Rich Dailey to give of himself. There was no question at all in his mind that he loved Vic and that meant that they would live together, sleep together, and make love. Rich searched the face across from him, memorizing it as he'd never done before. There were lines around the man's eyes, wrinkle-lines his mother called them. Vic's chin was strong, however, with a cleft that ran its full length. There was a touch of grey in his sideburns that he didn't remember being there before, even though it was set off by his short black hair. The skin beneath his lower jaw and on his neck had not yet loosened or become sagging double chins like it did on so many men this man's age. Vic Marshall could easily be thirty, instead of his forty-four. That was something Rich could not conceive of. This man was two years older than his mother; yet, she was the one who looked ancient. Her loose skin had become folds beneath her chin and she had crow's feet under her eyes. She looked her age. "Having second thoughts?" Vic asked gently; and Rich realized he'd been staring at the man. "No decision is irrevocable, kiddo." Rich shook his head. "No second thoughts, Vic." He grinned. "I was just thinking." "Want to share whatever it is?" He shook his head slowly, and Vic shrugged. As Vic ordered for them like he'd always done whenever he was with him and Dave. Rich suddenly realized that for some reason, the man's taking charge of events around them made him feel comfortable. And he recognized he liked to be taken care of by this man who was sitting across the table from him. Curiosity about the bit of gay Washington they were in grew and Rich glanced around the restaurant as the waiter scribbled their order on his pad and noticed two men by the window holding hands on top of their table. They were both young and he could see they were oblivious to everyone else in the room. He smiled to himself, understanding instinctively their love and happy at being shown how to express that love. He reached across the table and took Vic's hand in his, his eyes searching the other man's. "I love you, Vic Marshall," he said softly, trying to pitch his voice no further than the other side of the table between them. He felt a strange elation at expressing his feelings for this man. They were new to him, an unknown he had no preparation for. Vic smiled back at him and tightened his grip on Rich's hand. Rich's mind wandered again and he became aware of two other men across the room. They were nothing like the ones at the window. They were talking loudly and animatedly. Their voices were exaggerated imitations of long ago movie actresses. In his mind, he tried to dress them in women's clothes to go with their mannerisms and speech - but they remained ugly abnormalities no matter what he did with them. They were still men - fat, ugly, old men. There was an instinctual recoiling at the picture of them that he'd developed, and he tried to force it away. Only, it wouldn't go away - not completely. His eyes still held Vic's but his mind continued to wander, gathering up information around him from his other senses. This was his first foray in gay Washington and they were sitting in a restaurant a story above "P" Street; he wished he and Vic were sitting in the large bay window where everyone walking by outside could see them and know their love for each other. Like a kaleidoscope, his mind flitted back to the older men across the room from them. He hoped he'd never be like them - now that he was gay too. By the time their dinner arrived, Vic was beginning to wonder if his earlier estimation of a weekend of nearly non-stop sex had been off by a few light years. His doubts continued to grow as they ate and, even, later as they were driving back out to Virginia. Rich had been almost withdrawn all evening; and he'd been become absolutely silent in the car on the ride home. Vic assumed his behavior was remorse and accepted that he was going to sleep alone. Rich kept remembering the two men in the window as they were driving back to Virginia. But it was the two queens who'd come to occupy most of his thoughts. He was as queer as they were. He had to be - he'd sucked cock already and, by the end of the night, he'd have taken it up the ass as well. But he didn't want to be some sick caricature of a woman like them. He promised himself he'd be on constant look out for signs of his becoming like them. As Vic turned off the ignition, Rich turned to face him. "Am I going to end up being as - as girlish as those two guys were back at the restaurant?" he asked, catching the other man by surprise. Vic laughed and his hand went automatically to Rich's knee. "Luv, you can handle your gayness any way you feel comfortable doing it." "What's that supposed to mean?" There was an edge to his voice as he slipped further into his corner of the Jaguar. "Look, Rich, am I some sort of a nelly?" "No. You're all man, Vic." "That's right or-" He smiled depreciatingly. "At least, I hope it is - I choose not to be a flaming faggot. Some guys, though, like to put on the ritz - it's all a matter of each man being what he wants to be - and being free to do it." "I see, I think." He slid across the seat suddenly, reaching out with both hands to take Vic's face in his hands, and kissed him. "I want to be a man - just like you, Vic." "You'll be what you want to be." "With you - always with you!" * * * Vic stopped at the bar after they were in the house and began to fix drinks, but Rich paused in the doorway only long enough to see what he was doing. Out of the corner of his eye, the older man watched Rich glance towards the stairs and seem to blanch. Without saying a word, Rich headed for the stairs and the second story bedrooms. Vic refused to guess where he might end up. He'd already had enough of his preconceptions uprooted for one evening and refused to develop any more straw dogs for his son's friend to shoot down. Not just his son's friend, he reminded himself. A young man who'd sucked him off that evening and was trying to come to terms with being gay. Rich stood at the head of the stairs and shivered as he stared at the open door to Vic's room. The thought of the man's cock going up his ass was enough to scare him senseless, now it was close to happening. Still, though, he was going to do it - and he was going to do it with Vic in that bedroom before the sun came up again. He sighed and stepped toward the doorway waiting for him. Inside the darkened room he looked around, his fear rising up and threatening to claim him. He didn't have to do this! He didn't even have to sleep with the man. He could continue just sucking cock; he didn't have to have some big, hard tool shoved into his ass to be queer. He sighed again and pushed off his loafers, resisting the fear inside him. Hurriedly, he worked his belt loose and shoved his pants and briefs down his legs, stepping out of them. Nearly as quickly, he pulled off his shirt and tossed it onto the pile of his clothes. Shivering now he was naked, he quickly crossed the room and climbed onto the empty bed. With both drinks in hand, Vic started up the stairs. "Where are you?" he called uncertainly when he'd reached the landing. "Your room," Rich called back, swallowing his fear. Vic stood in the open doorway. The room beyond was dark and he allowed his eyes time to adjust to the darkness before him. Then, with the light from the hallway behind him, he gingerly stepped into the depth of the near darkness. He was able to make out the form of the boy lying on it as he approached the bed and was quickly able to see he was naked. "What took you so long?" Rich asked, making his voice silky in the darkness of the room. "I suspected you might like something to calm your nerves," he answered slowly. "I'm calm," Rich answered, his voice threatening to put the lie to his words as he took the proffered drink. "I'm just waiting for you so we can start up where we left off earlier. You think you're going to be able to handle having me as a lover?" Smiling, Vic sat on the edge of the bed and began to caress the boy's chest with his fingertips, studiously avoiding the cock that was already hard between his legs. "I'd thought you might want to take one of the other rooms tonight." He felt Richard tense under his fingers. "Do you want me to?" Rich swallowed hard as he forced himself to consider for the first time that this man he'd finally come to accept he loved might not want him now - or, even, ever. "No, I don't, Rich. But it is your body - you've got to be the one who decides to share it." "I thought I already did - this afternoon." "Not all of it, luv - and I'm not one to assume a damn thing." Vic smiled down at this boy who was a man and whom he was already having problems seeing in that light. He was confronted not with a dream, but its reality. Here, in his bed, lying naked and asking him to take it all was the dream he'd spent too many nights fantasizing about. He forced the questions from his thoughts. Rich's finger reached out and touched his lips, silencing him. "I want you to take me. I want you to fuck me. I want you to make love to me with everything you've got." "Are you sure?" he asked. "As sure as I am that I love you - and want you - Vic Marshall." He reached over to the nightstand and found the tube of lubricant the other man always kept there. Vic could see the white of the boy's teeth as he turned back to face him and grinned up at him. Rich spread his legs and began to coat his asslips. Vic permitted himself to wonder where the boy'd picked that trick up but decided to drop that thought too. He stood to pull his clothes off and sat back on the bed beside Rich Dailey, ready for whatever the man might decide to do next. "Fuck me," Rich whispered as he moved into Vic's arms. "Maybe later," the man responded and kissed him. His hand was full of hard, spongy heat as it grasped the man's cock and began to stroke it slowly. As he kissed him, his other hand found Rich's nearest nipple and tweaked it - gently at first and, then, harder. Rich pulled away for air and grunted while Vic's tongue began to trail across his chest. "Jesus!" he groaned, "It feels damned good." He moaned as the older man pinched the nipple beneath his fingers. "Fuck me, Vic - please!" he demanded with a groan as the man's tongue moved down across his abdomen. He moved his hand to cup the other man's chin, stopping his downward movement. "Do it, Vic - I'm begging you." "Later, luv - we've got all night for that," the older man mumbled. "I may lose my nerve. Do it now - please." Rich felt his fear rising, trying to claim him. He prayed Vic Marshall hurried up and got it over with. Vic pulled away from him and sat up. "You're sure?" "Uh huh," he answered, twisting around and throwing his legs over the man's shoulders. "You sure you've never done this before?" Vic asked dubiously. "Only in my dreams - come on." He grabbed the older man's face and pulled it down to meet his, resisting the urge to move away from him, away from what was nearly about to happen. He knew what he had to do. He was queer - and, now, he had to learn to be a queer. To do what queers did when they made love. Wanting Ron at work and all those times he'd dreamed of Vic and Dave taking him were living proof of his being a faggot. It sure as hell wasn't something he could deny to himself any more. Only, he was going to learn from a man he could trust. If it wasn't this man teaching him how to be the queer he was, it would be Ron doing it. Those had been the only two choices open to him when his mother'd kicked him out earlier that afternoon. Rich Dailey knew he'd chosen the best reality. Vic would be more than just a quick fuck; he was somebody Rich could hold onto, somebody who would be there to pick him up if he fell down. He'd known instinctively that Ron would never be that. He'd be a quick and fun roll in the hay once Rich knew how to be gay instead - if he ever wanted that. But he wasn't something he could hold on to - not ever. As they kissed, his hand searched for Vic's cock and, finding it, directed it to his asslips. Depositing it at the entrance to his lovechute, he reached around the man with both of his hands and, grasping both of his asscheeks, began to pull the older man against him. It hurt a great deal more than he had expected it to. He tried to relax and didn't realize tears were welling in his eyes as pain continued to spread out over him. Vic broke away from the kiss as he continued to impale the man beneath him. Rich gritted his teeth in order not to cry out. He lost his erection as the pain in his ass continued to expand and spread over him. "I'm hurting you," Vic mumbled in his ear and started to pull away from him. "No!" Rich grunted through his clinched teeth. "Do it. I've got to learn." He wondered why none of Vic's fuck flicks ever showed any of the hurt those boys had to be feeling. "You don't have to do anything that hurts." "Do it, Vic - please." Rich looked up at the man above him and forced himself to pull hard on the asscheeks under his hands, pulling him into him completely. Moments followed while the two of them and their movement hung suspended out of time. Caught and, then, stopped in space and time. Rich struggled against his body's natural tendency to repel the invader in his ass, forcing himself to relax and open up. After what seemed to be endless minutes, the worse of the pain began to subside and he tentatively wiggled his asscheeks against the thighs pressing against them - a force of will precluding any other act or thought. He felt Vic's balls press against his cheeks and sighed to himself. It was done. He'd lost his virginity. He had a cock all the way up his ass - and it was Vic's cock. That was all that mattered at the moment. The pain was already gone, and Vic nibbling at his nipples was beginning to arouse him again. "Okay, big boy," Rich chuckled in relief a moment later, "let's see what you can do with that thing you've got stuck up inside me." It wasn't so bad - now it was actually happening. He decided he'd be able to get the hang of it - and that he did want to get the hang of it. He reached between his raised legs and began to stroke his nearly flaccid cock, trying to synchronize his movement with Vic's slow initial thrusts into his ass, like the boys were always doing in those videos which he'd watched so many times late at night the past few years. Moments later, he decided that the movement of the cock inside him actually felt pretty damned good. His own cock was responding, growing into a full erection again. He looked up between his legs and watched as Vic's forehead creased with concentration. The man's eyes were closed and his lips pursed; and Rich permitted himself to wonder what he was thinking. The pain was gone; and the thrusting against his bottom was feeling good. His cock was rock hard and his balls were beginning to tighten. He was only lazily pulling on his cock, knowing instinctively that he was going to come whether he jerked off or not. Grinning at the realization, he allowed himself to wonder what it was about getting fucked that made his cock want to erupt. Vic was moving slowly above him, but he was now covered with a thin film of perspiration. He let himself go, surrendering to the massaging movements against his prostate and relaxed. Suddenly, his own orgasm was erupting down the channel that was his cock and Vic was still moving deliberately inside his lovechute. Rich grinned as the first volley of his jizz hit his shoulder. His eyes grew wide when he realized his erection wasn't disappearing. It remained - even though his cock was too sensitive for him to touch. And Vic Marshall was still ploughing his ass. "Can't you come?" he grunted between the man's thrusts. "You greased the shit out of your ass, kiddo," the other man groused. "It's going to take me a while." "Yeah - Jesus! But this?" Vic seemed to plunge deeper just then and he gasped. "Does it still hurt?" "Shit, no. It feels damned good," he managed, feeling the churning in his balls that presaged another ejaculation. "I'm going to come again!" he cried out in wonder. "Keep on coming, kiddo," Vic chuckled. "Why don't we see how many times I can make you come tonight?" Rich scooped a rope of jizz up from off his chest as the older man kept moving against his buttocks. He put his finger in his mouth, tasting his own juices for the first time. It was something he'd always wanted to do but never had the courage to do - until now. Now, it no longer mattered. He had already gone far beyond where his old fears had once stranded him. Rich sighed to himself, feeling Vic continue to grind against him. Smiling, he accepted himself. He was queer after all. But he was Vic's too. And that was all that really mattered. Later, Rich lay cuddled against Vic Marshall's chest on the bed. "Vic?" he whispered, his hand moving to encircle the man's chest. "Yeah?" the man answered drowsily. "I-" "I don't think I can do it again," Vic answered. "Not tonight, at any rate." "Yeah?" "Shit! I've already fucked you three times." Rich laughed softly. "And I've come at least five times." He hesitated before forcing himself to put into words what he was feeling. "Vic, look, I know you still think of me as some little kid or something - but will you give us a chance?" "What?" the older man yelped, coming awake fully and staring at the figure of the boy lying beside him. "I love you. At least give me a chance." Vic sighed. "I'm a hell of a lot older than you are, Rich and-" "I want a chance, damn it. I want a chance to grow with you - please?" "I--" Rich pressed himself closer to him. "Give us both the chance to be happy together, Vic." Vic gazed at the silhouette that was Rich Dailey beside him for a long time, barely making the man out in the darkness that enveloped the room. He sighed finally. "As long as you want then - but I'll never hold you back." "You won't have to - I'll be holding on to you. I'm not about to give you up, not now that I've finally got you." %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%% Recently, I came across an interesting book - 3 MINUTES A DAY TO A 120 YEAR LIFESPAN by Robert D Willix Jr, MD, (Life LLC, Baltimore, MD). You have to understand that at 57, my joints had started to ache, I didn't have the same amount of energy I had when I was 30, etc. I wasn't ready to be old. In short, I was ready for this book. In addition, I'm overweight. It's come from sitting in front of my computer and writing all these sexy stories - or something like that. Looking at myself in the mirror, I was reminded of the old Alfred Hitchcock television series - remember his shadowed profile on the wall? Fat! Real overhang. Hell! I'm a bloody bear - and I'm not turned on by that image (sorry, guys, but a smooth swimmer's build does it for me every time). I was ready for more than just this book. I was fortunate that a friend of mine appeared about the same time and offered me a way to get rid of those nagging aches and pains as well as to lose that weight. In addition, I could nourish my body with a mixture of vitamins, minerals, and herbs developed by some of the best medical minds in the US (Please realise that there is just no way for a person living in North America, Europe or northern Asia to get all of the nutrition his body needs from just the food he eats - but the Asians come closer than the Caucasians). There's even a nutritional weight gaining programme for those of you who need it (I hate you already). In a month, I've lost 3 inches off my waist and 30 pounds. My knees no longer hurt when I squat. And I have as much energy as I remember myself having when I was in my 20s. This isn't an advertisement. If you're interested in more - good nutrition, weight loss, anti-oxidants, or even weight gain - write me at Vichowel@aol.com. I can give you more information and either answer your questions or find you answers.