I want to dedicate this story to anyone and everyone who has ever been bullied, discriminated against, abused or murdered for their thoughts, beliefs, race, feelings, who or what they are or were. I wish nothing like that would ever happen. Sadly it continues today. Even from the highest levels.

ericmurphey1971@gmail.com

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My Former Life

Part 2

Ben has been staying with me now about two weeks. We are getting along very well. We go to the office and he draws and reads. We go home and we have a nice evening together. Its been very nice. I still haven't made love to him yet. But, how I long too. I will, it will happen. I just don't want to rush it. His sister is recovering so well that the doctors said she could go back to the dorms. Well, I wasn't having that. I moved them into a little apartment in the building Anna's family lives in. One opened up somehow. Don't ask how, it just did. The man who was stealing potatoes seemed to wind up in a dorm with his family. What a rotten man he was. He deserves whatever he gets in my opinion. Stealing food from children bah. I am almost done at the office today and I tell Ben.

“Go and see your mother and sister and see how they are doing.”
“Are you sure?”
He asks this because we have gotten into a routine and I think he enjoys it as much as I do.

“Yes I need to do some things after work and it would be difficult explaining having a Jewish boy with me as I walk into headquarters.”
“Oh.” He says understanding.

Before he leaves he walks around my desk and kisses my cheek as has become his custom as I send him on errands or to go see his family.

I smile at him and give him a quick kiss on the lips before he runs to see his sister and mother. A few minutes later my Sargent comes in and as per usual I dismiss him. Once he is gone I lean back in my chair and think. I am not too sure how to do what I am planning. But, it will surely come to pass. It just has too. Once I decide what to do I walk out and get my coat on as its gotten bitter cold. I get in my staff car and drive out of the camp and head into town. I walk into a little shop and a wiry old lady is working.

“Good evening Herr Major what can I do for you?”
“I tell her what I want and she gets them and packs them in a few boxes for me and wraps some in brown paper that wont fit well in a box. A boy takes my things out and puts them in the trunk of my car. I walk out after he is done and hand him a few marks. I am rewarded with a big grin.

“Thank you Herr Major.”

“Anytime.” I say as I am thinking what a gorgeous boy. He is the perfect Aryan, Hitler is always talking about. Hes about ten with blonde hair and piercing blue eyes. I would definitely like to have him. But, don't dare try. I imagine I could get away with it being as who and what I am. But, its not worth the risk. I go to the next shop and its ran by a young man around twenty five. I notice as he walks around he walks with a very pronounced limp. I decide that he doesn't have part or all of his left leg anymore. I tell him what I want and he shows me several.

“Which is the best for the money?” I ask.

“Oh this one Herr Major. I have had it for a while and I will give you a discount if you want it. I will take off 25% if you want this one.”
With the economy still improving money isn't very easy to come by for many people.

“I will take that one. Your sure its the best?”

“Its not the best. But, it is the best I have.”
“Then it will do nicely.”
He smiles and puts it away and hands it to me.

“Thank you Herr Major. If you need anything else please come see me. I will give you a good price every time.” He says smiling.

“Thank you I will see you if I need anything else.”
I take the package and put it in the back seat and head back to the camp. Once I get through the gates which for me is basically drive up they see who it is and shit their pants and open the gate. Of course with a salute as I drive through.

Once I get to my little house I walk in and Anna as usual is waiting for me in the kitchen scurrying around.

“Anna would you help me get some things from the car please.”
“Of course Herr Major.”

She follows me out and she helps carry in the packages from the trunk as there are several. I get the last item from the back seat and carry it in and put it on the coffee table. Anna looks at it and smiles.

“For Benjamin?”
“Well, its not for me.” I say looking at her with a smile.

“No I think in a way it is for you.”
“You may be right about that.” I say with a smile.
“Herr Major I made a chocolate cake again to replace the one that you were so generous with for my daughter.” She says smiling.

“Thank you Anna. You are free to leave whenever you like.”
“Thank you Herr Major. I just have to clean up just a bit before I go.”
“That's fine. When you get home please send Ben back if hes not already.”
“Yes Herr Major.” She says smiling.

Seems like smiles are becoming more common in my life. Not so much in the office but, everywhere else. I think however, I'm not sure because its never happened before. But, I think I am genuinely happy. I sit down and grab a cigarette from the box on the table and light it and grab the paper. I open it and without nearly a sound Anna sits a cup of coffee next to me.

“Thank you.”
She just smiles and heads back to the kitchen. I hear her leave a little later. Five minutes later I hear the back door open and I hear Ben coming in. He takes of his boots at the back door and I see him from the corner of my eye walking and sitting them in what has become his boot cleaning and polishing area. He walks back into the room and sees whats on the coffee table and stops dead in is tracks.

I act as if I don't see him. He is so precious. He tip toes up to the table and looks at me. I am glimpsing over the top of the paper and watching him. But, he isn't certain if I see him or I am reading. He looks at the table again then back at me.

“Well, go ahead.” I say.

“Is it really for me?”
I close the paper and look at him and cock my head.

“Who else would it be for?”
He takes another step forward and he fingers the case. Then he flips the latches. When he opens it he gasps.

“Oh my.” Is all he says as he admires it. He pulls it carefully from the case and he runs his fingers over it.

“Oh my. Oh my.” He says just above a whisper.

He takes out the rest and he puts it on his shoulder and starts to play the most beautiful song on the violin I have ever heard. I watch as his fingers seem to caress the strings as he presses them to get the proper note. I watch him slide the bow over the strings. It is so graceful and beautiful I nearly cry. I cant see his face as he plays because his head is tilted but, I imagine it was more beautiful then ever as he plays. Once he finishes the song he looks up at me. I see that he has tears streaming down his face.

“Thank you Hans. Thank you so much.”

“Please play another.”
“This one I will play for you.”
He lifts it back to his shoulder and he places the bow on the strings and plays a song that I have never heard before. But, it is even more beautiful then the first. Once he is done he places the instrument back in its home gingerly and puts the bow back in its place he closes the case and looks at me. I look into his lovely green eyes and I swear I could see his soul. As he looks into my eyes, I feel he too can see mine.

“This… “ He is trying to say through his tears.

“Come here.” I say opening my arms to him.

He quickly comes to me and I embrace him. I pull him to me as I sit back in the chair and hold him. I hold him, and gently caress his back as if nothing or no one else in the world matters. Because at that time no one else did. I knew he would like it. I just didn't know that it would be this much. If I would have known I would have gotten it before now.

I hold him for what seems like a mere second but, what was probably ten minutes until he finally finds his words.

“This means more to me then you can understand. I always loved to play. When we were still free of the camp. Many days I would go and play on the corner for money to feed my family. One day a German soldier came by. He listened to me play a song. Then he ripped it from my hands and smashed it on the street with his boot. He told me no Jew Swine should play that well. I haven't been able to play since. When I was playing it was like I was free again.”

I just nod because I understand where he is coming from. He likes his life with me. I treat him very well and he loves me. But, freedom is better.

“I have some other things for you as well.” I say and pick him up and carry him to the bedroom. Anna had unboxed everything and it all lay on the bed. He looks at it all and smiles.

“I love you so much.” I smile and respond.
“I love you too Ben.”
I put him down and he fingers the colored chalks and then the brushes. He looks at the canvases and he admires each and every item as he does. It takes him a good five minutes to see and touch it all.

“I think you have a great talent and I hate to see it wasted. I don't know if you would want to paint. But, I got some paints as well. I think that you can draw and paint and I will sign my name to it and I believe they will sell.”
“You told my mother that at the hospital.”
“I don't think anyone would buy something drawn or painted by a Jewish boy. But, I do think that they would buy it if they thought it was from an SS officer.”
He nods in agreement.

“Can I try to draw something now with the chalks?”
“Why do you think I got them. Enjoy.” I say.

He smiles like its his birthday and just got the greatest gifts ever. He gets a smaller canvas. I have gotten about ten in different sizes. He then grabs the chalk set and takes them to the coffee table. I get my paper and start reading again. After a bit he asks if he may turn on the radio. Of course I say that's fine. I finish my paper and start to look.

“No not yet. I don't want you to see it until its done.”
“That's fine Ben. I will go and get our supper ready for us then.”
He smiles at me and I smile back trying to see what he has done. But, he has his chest and arms covering most of it. I walk out and see Anna has made us a nice roast. I glance into the bread box and see two HUGE pieces of cake for us. Oh my goodness I think it must be half the damn cake. I set the food on the table and let Ben know its ready.

He comes in and his hands are covered in colors.

“I better wash my hands first.” He says as he glances at them.

“That my young friend would be a good idea.”
He rushes to the sink and scrubs them clean. I am waiting to start eating until he sits down. As many times as I have told him to get what he wants he still wont and I have to put the food on his plate. In a way its sad. In another way its kind of endearing. I just wish he would feel comfortable enough to get his own food. I don't mind but, it just seems wrong for a boy afraid to get food. It is the times I guess, and I absolutely hate it.

We sit and enjoy our dinner and we chat about his sister and I find out she is nearly done coughing up the sickness. I am glad about that. He tells me his mother and sister would like to come to the house and thank me properly for the treatment for her.

“Ben that's not necessary.”

“I know you did it from the heart and I also know you would do it for everyone if you could. But, they really want to thank you for it. I think it would mean a lot for them to do that.”

“OK then today is Tuesday have them come over Saturday afternoon around lunch time and I will have Anna make enough for them as well. How about a nice stew?”
He smiles.

“That would be nice. Anna makes good stew.” He says grinning.
“Then its settled they will come over on Saturday then. Tell them if anyone asks them what they were doing here have them tell them they were cleaning.”
Once we finish dinner as usual Ben puts the dishes in the sink and rinses them. He then gets me a cigarette and I sit and enjoy it at the table. He heads back to work on his drawing. Once I finish I walk back out to the living room and he is drawing still. I respect his wishes and don't look as much as I wanted to. I sit down and turn on the lamp beside my chair and start reading a new book I started. I read for an hour or so and Ben taps my knee.

“I'm done would you like to see it?”
“More then anything in the world.” I say as I close my book and set it aside. He holds up the drawing and it is simply amazing. It is a man and a boy sitting next to a lake nude. You cant see anything but, you can see they are nude. It looks as if they just had a nice swim and are enjoying a picnic. The boy is laughing and the man is smiling. It cant be denied it is so good,that it is obviously us.

“Oh my goodness. It is amazing. That one I can never sell. I will keep it forever.” As I type this at my hundred years of age I glance up and look at it again. It is where it has been since I came to America in 1944. Hanging proudly in my den in front of my desk so I can always see it as I work. I smile and think back to that day how proud I was and he was too at creating something so magnificent.

I say to him so many years ago.

“This one you must sign. I will not take credit for this one. It is just too touching and I want your name on it. As a matter of fact I am going to take it into town and have it framed and put behind glass so it wont lose its color ever.”
With this he smiles his big smile and looks at me with those emerald eyes.

“You really like it.”
“I love it.”
That night as is becoming our custom he gets nude and cleans our boots and then comes and reads on my lap. I gently caress him as we read. Not in a sexual way even though he is hard most of the time. But, in a loving way. It is a very peaceful and relaxing way for us to enjoy the evening.

Time just seems to fly and before I know it Saturday is here and he is rushing around and cleaning like a fiend because he wants his mother and sister to be impressed with how good of a job he is doing for me. I don't understand why hes doing it. It seems to look the same to me as he cleans and cleans everything again. He does a fantastic job. I know he takes a lot of pride in what he does. No matter what it is. If its cleaning or painting now or shining our boots. He is a very meticulous person.. Everything he does must be perfect. I just wish I could let him run free as all boys should be allowed. But I dare not for fear someone may not know he is mine and harm him. Or worse someone knows he is mine and harm him for that.

At noon we hear a light tap on the door. Ben looks at me as if should I answer the door. I wave for him to do just that. He rushes to the door and opens it and in walk his mother and sister. His mother is a pretty woman probably about thirty maybe a bit older. Of course she is rail thin. But you can tell she has always been a pretty woman. She is around thirty. His sister is lovely. She is eleven and just starting to grow little buds. She too has the lovely green eyes as her brother. It is bitter cold out still and neither of them have a good coat to wear. I will see if I can remedy that in the next day or so I think. They are both shivering as they step into the living room.

“Please stand close to the heater and warm up.” I say.

“Thank you Herr Major.” His sister says.

“No reason for you to get sick again. Now is there?”
“No Herr Major.” She replies sheepishly.

“Anna get out guests some coffee to warm them please.” I say to her as she enters the room. She does an about face and heads back into the kitchen and is back in a moment with coffee for them and she refills my cup as well.

“Thank you.” I say.

They hold the cups in their hands and sip the warm brew as they try to warm from their bones out. I watch as they shiver and slowly begin to stop as they get warmer.

“Come to my office Monday in the morning I will send Ben to get you both some good coats.”
“Thank you Herr Major.” Ben's mother says finally breaking her silence.

“When you get warm enough please sit down and make yourselves at home.”

Ben being the sweet boy he is trying to help warm his mother and sister by rubbing their arms. After a few minutes and as they sip the last of their coffee they are finally warm. They sit on the couch and both sit very lady like crossing their ankles. Both have on what I assume is their best dresses which still look pretty rough. But I can tell that she has tried very hard to get them as clean as possible.

“I wish I could do more for you two. But, if I do more then what I have done so far I may be suspected of aiding the enemy of the state.” I say sadly.

“You have done enough Herr Major and we are thankful for what you have done.”
“Have you been getting the extra food rations from Anna?”
“Oh yes Herr Major. It is so lovely to have meat again.”
“I wish I could do more.” I say with remorse in my voice.

Ben still standing finally sits next to me in the big overstuffed chair we share often. I put my arm around him and he cuddles in as usual.

“I'm sorry I don't even know your names. What are they?” I ask.

“I am Shelia and this is Avigail.” The mother says.

“Well, those are both lovely names. I am glad that I can have you over for lunch today so I can meet you both in a how shall I say a safer setting without watchful eyes.”
“Yes Herr Major. We are very pleased to be here. Our neighbor asked why we were coming here and we said as you instructed us that we are to clean for you.”

“Very good. If anyone gets suspicious please let me know. Especially one of my men.”
“Yes Herr Major. We understand.” Avi says.

“Ben why don't you go get one of your paintings to show your mother.” I say and scoot him off of the chair and pat him on the butt as he goes to the bedroom to get one. He is very busy as he paints one an evening. They are all very good I wonder which he will bring out. He returns a moment later with a beauty. Its a picture of a family on a hillside covered with lovely flowers and they are playing and having fun. It is a nice one for sure.

“Oh my Benjamin.” His mother says smiling and then clasping her hands over her mouth. “You really are as talented as Herr Major said you are.”
“Yes he is very talented. I think we will be able to get a nice amount for his paintings.”
“That's so nice of you to let him explore his talent like this.”

“He enjoys it, and I enjoy that he enjoys it.”
Ben takes the painting back and returns a moment later resuming his spot next to me. This time he puts my arm around him as he sits down and snuggles in. His mother smiles at this.

“So Shelia do you have any family?”

“Yes Herr Major I have a sister that lives in New York City in America. She was lucky and got an exit visa when the Fuhrer took power. We like many others weren't so lucky. I also have an Aunt that lives in Paris. My husband as I'm sure you already know has passed away. My mother and father are also no longer with us.”
“I'm sorry to hear that.”
“It has been many years ago. I still miss them but, the sting is still not gone.”
“I understand.”
At this time Anna comes in and whispers in my ear.

“Yes at the table please.” I say.

She heads back to the kitchen and we continue chatting.

“So what did you do before this?”
“I was a dress maker. I made the finest dresses for the ladies of means.”
“That must have been rewarding.”
“I loved it. I would go into the finest homes in Berlin and meet the most amazing people. I truly loved my work.”
“If I could get you work doing that now would you want to?”
“Certainly.”
“I couldn't give you the money as you know that is forbidden. But, we can work something out if you would like.”
“I would love to do that. It would be so much better then working in the factory.”
“Of course Avigail would have to help you because we cant have her in the factory either.”
With this Avigail smiles.

“I will see what I can do for you. I cant make any promises as to how or when it will happen. But, I will try that I promise.”
“Thank you Herr Major for trying at least.”
At this Anna opens the swinging door from the kitchen and I see her.

“I believe our lunch is ready. Please lets go into the kitchen and enjoy.”

We all head into the kitchen and sit down at the table. As we get out food I take Avi and Ben's hand and bow my head. I then say.

“Baruch ata Adonai Wloheinu melekh ha’olam shehakol niya bidvro.” I hear Anna gasp as I pray in Hebrew giving thanks for the food. It translates Blessed are you, Lord our God. Ruler of the universe, at whose word all came to be.

After I am done and look up all eyes in the room are big as saucers.

“What no Amen?” I say.

All quickly say amen.

Anna is still staring at me her mouth open.

“Anna if you don't close your mouth a fly will go in it.” She closes her mouth.

“Herr Major how did you know the prayer and actually the right one for the meal?” Ben asks. Thankfully he is getting less afraid of the situation which I am so happy about. Not afraid really just cautious.

“Ben when I was growing up an older couple lived next door to me and my parents left me with them a lot. They happened to be Jewish and I learned a lot from them. Does that answer your question?”
“Yes Herr Major.” He says and begins to eat.

“Its like you guys have never heard an SS Major pray in Hebrew before.” I say and everyone laughs at this.

We all eat with very little talk as eating is serious business for people who don't get to as often as they need to. Once we are done and I am sure that everyone has had enough Ben goes and gets me a cigarette from the box on my coffee table and brings it to me without my asking. He also brought the table lighter as well. I light it and he takes it back into the living room and returns.

“I hope that you enjoyed your meal.” I say as I exhale a large plume of smoke.

Avigail coughs a bit.

“Oh I do apologize is the smoke bothering you?” I ask with sincerity.

“No Herr major please enjoy your cigarette.” She says.

“If it bothers you I will put it out.”
“I wouldn't hear of it.” Shelia says. “We would never have our host not enjoy his cigarette after dinner.”
I take another drag and exhale the smoke and she coughs again. I look at the cigarette and snub it out in the ashtray.

“Lets go back to the living room. I find it more comfortable there.”

I get up and they all follow me. Ben would have gotten the dishes but, with Anna here she has already cleared the table. I sit in my chair and look at Ben. I wink at him he smiles and goes to the bedroom. We hear it before he walks into the room. He has started playing his violin. His mother looks at the door as he walks through and sees him. Tears are streaming down her face at the joy she has seeing her boy playing the instrument he loves.

“Oh Benjamin.” Is all she says.

Avigail is smiling knowing how happy her brother is playing. She remembers the rivers of tears he cried for days after the cruel man broke his violin.

Ben continues walking out and stands in front of all of us and plays several songs for us to enjoy.

“Herr Major might I use your restroom?” Avigail asks.

“Yes please be my guest. Ben show her where it is.” Ben walks into the other room to show her.

“You love my son don't you?”
“Yes.” I reply.

“No I mean you really love my son?” She asks.

“Yes.” I say again.

“I can tell he really loves you as well.” She says smiling. “I'm in no position to ask anything of you Herr Major. But, please be gentle with him.”
I move over next to her and put my hand on hers which is on her knee.

“I promise I will be. I think he may be the love of my life.”
“I knew from the time he was little he was different. I always worried about him for that. In this day and age its a death sentence.”
“It wasn't much better then that before.” I remove my hand from hers and lean back on the couch.

“Herr Major I do want to thank you for helping my daughter and my son. I came here to offer myself or my daughter to you as thanks. But, I can see that you would not be interested in either. I don't mean that in a bad way. We are who we are and I am so thankful that you are how you are because it has saved us I think.”

“I want you to know I have never done anything that he doesn't want to do.”
“I know I can see in your eyes. Both of your eyes show the love you have for each other.”
“I certainly hope no one else can.”
“No it is something a mother can see and no one else. I can see he is very happy here. I am happy for him. I just hope as he gets older you wont lose interest in him.”

I look at her and think a moment before I speak.

“I honestly don't know. I do know that as long as we are in this situation he and your family will be taken care of the best I can.”

This time she puts her hand on mine.

“Thank you. I will pray for you.”

I just nod. At this time both children return to the room.

Ben looks at me kind of funny him seeing his mothers hand on mine and us looking so serious. We chat a while longer and they say they must be going as to not raise any suspicions. I agree and they take off back to their little apartment.

After they leave I sit down and start to read the paper as it has arrived. I open it and Ben decides he wants to paint so he gets his equipment and he starts to paint another picture. Ben always paints nude so he wont get any paint on his new clothing. I really don't mind even a little. I wont lie I enjoy watching him paint in the nude. I just really enjoy seeing him nude.

“I suppose I am going to have to get more canvases for you soon.” I say looking over the paper.

“You don't have to I can paint over these.”
“Not a chance.” is my reply. I go back to the paper reading the bullshit propaganda that is in the paper they call news. Granted this was years before even kristalnacht but, this is what leads up to it. It is the gearing up for the total hatred of well everything that wasn't Nazi. It was a truly sad time.

Once he is done painting he goes to the restroom to clean off any paint hes gotten on himself. Sometimes its a lot others not so much. He returns and sits next to me.

“Hans I want to thank you for having my family over for lunch. I think you were right for me to surprise my mom with the violin after lunch. She seemed very happy about it.”
“Yes she did. I'm glad to make her happy when she really doesn't have much to be happy about.”
“Yeah.” He says and burrows into me. I wrap my arm around him and in moments he is napping. I hear his soft little snore and I look down and admire him. He is such a lovely boy. In just a little time he is gaining weight and looking as a boy his age should. He is gaining muscles and a bit not a lot but a bit of fat. I rub his soft belly and chest as he sleeps. I set the paper aside and get my book. I sit like this for an hour or so reading and Anna walks out.

“Herr Major dinner is in the oven when you two are ready for it. I am done for the day may I go?”
“Yes please Anna. Wish your family well for me.” I say.

“Yes Herr Major I certainly will.”
She hesitates a moment before she starts to leave.

“Was there something else Anna?”
“Well Herr Major I hate to ask. But, tomorrow is my husbands and my anniversary.”
“Yes?”

“I was wondering if I might have the day off Herr Major.”

I think for a moment and answer.

“Yes you may. However I want you to come by around noon time for a few minutes.”
“Yes Herr Major. Thank you Herr Major.”
“Anna.”
“Yes Herr Major.”
“When a special occasion arises please let me know so I can let you enjoy your family.”
She smiles a broad grin.

“Yes Herr Major.” She seems to float out of the room as she goes.

I smile at her happiness. I wish I could do more for her. Well, for everyone for that matter.

After she leaves I decide I would like to have a smoke and I lean forward to get one off the table trying not to disturb Ben's sleep. I reach and get one and then light it. His head has slipped into my lap and my cock is thinking its going to get some attention and rises for what it wants. It knows how sweet, soft and loving Ben's mouth is. I lean back and take a drag from my cigarette and Ben moves his hand to my cock and he wraps his hand around it as he sleeps. He has a tendency to grab me as he sleeps. I am not complaining one bit about it. It is a truly lovely feeling to wake and have your hard cock being held by a young soft boy hand. I begin to read again and am enjoying my book immensely. I finish my smoke and snuff it out. I stretch out my legs and put my feet on the coffee table, and readjust my position. I'm starting to get a bit sleepy so I close my eyes and lay my book on my chest and allow myself to doze. I am having a very erotic dream as I doze. Ben is sitting in the floor in front of me and sucking my hard cock and nearly taking the entire shaft into his mouth. It feels so amazing and so real. I know I am dreaming though. I wake up as I reach my climax and I see my cock is pulled through my fly and Ben is on the floor and has my cock deep in his throat. I grab the back of his head and thrust in and out of his eager young mouth and unload myself into his throat. It is truly the best orgasm I have ever had. After I shoot my load into his throat I am in a blissful state and I come down slowly, very slowly from my high. He sucks me dry and puts my cock back into my pants and redoes my fly. He doesn't say a word and he climbs back up in the chair. I see his cock is hard and bouncing. I lift him up and take his hard little cock into my mouth. I am bobbing quickly on it as I am still pretty hot. He in turn starts to pump in and out of my mouth. I let him set the pace he wants and its pretty fast. He is slamming into my mouth so fast and hard it almost hurts. But, in a good way because I know my love is enjoying his feelings. I feel him shake and quiver from his tingles and he just collapses after he does. He is half leaning over the back of the chair. Once he collects himself he turns himself around and sits on my lap.

“That was amazing.” He says still breathless.

“I definitely agree. I would never mind waking up like that.” I say smiling and slowly running my fingers through his now damp hair.

“What made you think to do that?” I ask him.

“Well, you were hard and it was bouncing. I would squeeze it and it would bounce and you would kind of push up as I did. I could tell you were really hot so I thought why not.”

“That was a good thought. That's for sure.”
“Anna left a while ago and put dinner in the oven keeping warm. Are you hungry?”
Just then his tummy rumbles.

“Ill take that as a yes.”
We head to the kitchen him still naked and leading the way and I watch his lovely little ass in front of me. I cant think of a more beautiful sight then a boys bottom bouncing as he walks nude. Such a wonderful sight that's for sure. He climbs up on his chair and I get out the dinner and sit it on the table. He is buttering some brown bread for us. He makes two slices for me and one for him. I put some meat and potatoes on his plate for him. Anna has somehow found some white asparagus and I put several spears on his plate as well.

“I should have sent some of the food home with your mother and sister.” I say.

“No they have plenty now. Sarah was telling me that they have enough they are feeding the two neighbors boys too. They cant feed their parents but the parents are happy to have their sons potatoes. They are really happy the boys get to eat so well.”
“How old are they?”

Ben gives me a look like what you want to trade me in? Yet he answers anyway.

“One is eight the other is seven. Sarah says they are nice boys.”

“I'm sure they are. But, I doubt they are as handsome as you are.”
He looks up and smiles at me with a mouth full of food, knowing I want him not them.

“Tomorrow is Anna's anniversary. I need to go into town and get her a gift of some sort that wont be taken from her. I'm also going to take some of your paintings and see if I can sell them.”
“OK.” He says and takes another bite.

Once we are done with dinner he takes the plates and rinses them off and sits them in the sink. He then goes to get me a cigarette and the lighter.

“I was surprised when you put out your cigarette earlier.” He says.

“It was obviously bothering your sister even though she wouldn't admit it.”
“Yeah it was really nice of you.”
“I try to be nice when I can.”
“What did you do to that man you made come to your office the other day?”

“Do you really want to know?”

“I think so.”

“Well, after you told me what he does I had him taken out and beaten. I told them to give him ten lashes and then put him in the stockade. I told them to only give him water for three days to punish him for stealing food. I went to see him and now he knows what those children felt like when he took their food. I then had him and his family moved from an apartment and put into one of the dorms. I also put him and his family on half rations for a week. I also had the guards follow him so they would make sure he didn't do it again. Do you think that was too harsh?”

“I don't know sir. But, I am sure he has learned his lesson from it.”

“I think he has. He had a pretty good life. Well, as good as can be here. But, his greediness took that from him. I just get so angry when I try so hard to make sure that people have as much as I can give them and then they steal from those who are smaller or weaker than themselves. Especially when they are the ones they should be helping not hurting.”

Ben nods.

We go to the living room and I have Ben turn on the radio because a show is coming on I know he enjoys. I like it too its a comedy program and we sit and listen and laugh together and enjoy the show. After that show is another a more serious show we both enjoy as well. We sit and listen to the radio until the clock strikes nine and he turns it off and goes and runs our bath. I go in and I undress as he does this. I never put on boots today and have been running around in my stocking feet so I slip off my pants and unbutton my shirt and toss it in the hamper. I take of socks and underwear and toss them in as well. I never put on my uniform jacket today either. I knew I wasn't leaving so why bother. I walk in and he gets in the tub and I get in behind him. We follow our usual routine of him washing me first. Then I bathe him after. He really seems to enjoy me sliding my finger in and out of his bum. Tonight I slide one in and out for a while and then slip in a second. He gasps at first then as he gets used to it is just as happy as ever as I tickle his inside with my fingers. Once we are done with his nightly tingles he gets out and wraps a towel around himself and gets one for me as I step out he hands it to me and I dry myself. We go into the bedroom and he slides under the covers and I get in behind him.

“Hans when are you going to make love to me?”

I am kind of shocked at his question. But, kind of turned on by it too.

“I don't know. I don't think you are ready yet.”
“But, tonight you put in two fingers and I liked it very much. I want to feel you inside of me.”

“I don't know when. But, I know it wont be tonight.”
I am lying on my back and he climbs on top of me and my cock is hard still from inserting my fingers in him. It is such a turn on for me when I do that. Especially knowing he likes it. No loves it. He lays on my chest and slips my cock from under us and places it in his crack and he holds it there with his hand and he starts moving up down on me and my cock is sliding between his lovely cheeks. It feels so soft and lovely as he does this. I can feel his hardness sliding up and down my belly. He starts moving up and down more quickly as he is getting as much enjoyment from this as I am. I feel as though he is close as his cheeks tighten around my cock and he is moving at lightening speed. He starts to moan and I shoot my load and as I do I can tell he is hitting his peak and he is shoving his cock into my belly as hard as he can. He is rubbing my cock with his hand and his cheeks. I am panting from the sheer excitement and bliss of the moment. I feel down as he stops and feel my cum all over his back and between his cheeks. I hold him tightly hugging him.

“That felt really good buddy. Where did you get that idea?”
“I figured its the closest thing to you making love to me without actually doing it.”
“I must say it felt amazing.”
“So you want to do it again.” He says smiling.

Mind you I was 23 at the time so I smile back and say yes.

So we did it again and it was even better the second time as we had my cum as lubricant. I could feel my cock slipping and sliding so much better this time. After we both came again we both drifted off to sleep both smiling at each other.

I woke the next morning and was a bit surprised Ben was still in bed. He is usually up before me and doing something to make my home nicer. Either cleaning or shining boots, usually something. I guess my little guy is tuckered out this morning. He is next to me cuddled in his cute little bum pressed up against my morning wood. It is laying between his cheeks. I like this feeling to wake up to I think. I slip out of bed hoping not to disturb him. I go and shave and of course use the restroom as well. I walk back out he is still sleeping. I smile and tuck him in so he doesn't get cold. I get dressed without making a sound. I take my boots out to the living room and slip them on. I head to the kitchen and make myself a couple slices of toast and some coffee. Ben has taken to drinking coffee in the mornings with me. He adds so much sugar I asked him if he wanted some coffee with his sugar. He just smiled and went about his sipping the beverage. I have my toast and coffee afterwards I look in on him to make sure hes OK. I watch him a moment from the door and admire his beautiful face. He looks so peaceful. What a shitty way to grow up I think. I cant really take him with me today anyway so I carefully get his paintings I signed which I hate. But, its how it has to be and load them into the boot of my staff car. I take off to town and stop at the art dealers shop. I knew he would be there as I had made plans to meet him this morning. I walk in carrying a couple of the slew of paintings I have in the boot and he admires them a few minutes.

“Do you think they are any good?” I ask. Just because I think its great doesn't mean he will.

“Yes. Yes they are very good. How long have you been painting?”
“I don't know a while now I guess.” I say not even thinking he would ask anything. I was very unprepared I suppose.

“How many more do you have?” He asks.

“I have several in the car. I can go get them if you like.”
“Yes please do. I am certain that I can sell them all if they are as good as these two.”
I smile to myself and I go get the others. It is ten in all now. I bring them in and he eyes them over carefully.

“I like what you do with the colors. Your paintings are simply wonderful.”
“Do you buy them or are they sold on consignment?”
“We can do either if you prefer. I will give you four hundred marks per painting. I know I can easily get that out of them. If I can get what I think I can I will give you more on these later.”
“How much do you think you can sell them for?”

“I think honestly.” He says rubbing his cheek and eyeing one of the paintings. “I think this one here I can get at least fifteen hundred marks for. The rest I believe I can get around five to six hundred. If I get six we call it even. If I get more I will give you more. I think its fair I make two hundred a painting to cover my costs and feed my family.”
“I believe that to be fair.”I know he wouldn't lie to me him seeing I am an SS Major. Something about the black uniform seems to bring out the truth in people. Maybe its the skull and cross bones on the cap. I don't know but, I do know he wont try to screw me.

“Would you prefer to sell them first and then pay me or pay me now and make up any differences later.’

“I think I will pay now. I know I can sell at least two of them today. I just sold a few very nice paintings last week so I have a bit of a surplus of cash right now. So this time I will pay in advance. Others I may not be able to,”
“I understand.” I say as I look at my signature Hans Lechter and the SS underneath. I frown when I see it. But, I know that it will be worth it in the end. Or so I hope. He goes to his back room and comes out and hands me 4,000 marks for the paintings.

“I have lots of free time in the evenings and I have been painting a lot lately. Should I come back when I have just a few or say ten like today?” I ask.

“I think if you paint several in a week bring them in weekly. If just one or two a week that's fine too. If you like just come in every Sunday like today.”
I shake his hand and sign a receipt of sale to him.

As I leave I think four thousand marks is a lot of damn money. Especially seeing as how the average worker only made a bit less then 1600 Reich marks a year. So yeah four thousand was a hell of a lot. When I walk out I look over my shoulder and see the dealer admiring the paintings and I smile. If he only knew the truth. I head back to the art store and I get a dozen more canvases and paints for Ben and the lady is amazed “I” went through them so quickly. I smile and tell her I have a lot of free time in the evenings. She is happy to have the sale. I guess with nearly thirty percent unemployment at this time not a lot of people are buying art supplies. Seems like the entire world is broke and has been for a few years. But, it seems like its getting better. I saw in the paper could be propaganda who knows. But, the government is starting a huge project called the Autobahn. Its my understanding its a huge highway that isn't crossed by other roads so you can travel at high rates of speed. But, who knows if it is true or not. I don't believe anything anymore until I see it. The cute boy carries my packages out to the car for me again. He looks at me and smiles hoping for another tip. I reach in my coat pocket and pull out a ten Reich mark note and a chocolate bar and hand them to him. I had picked up a few for Ben and had yet to give them to him. A boy deserves a nice treat now and again. The boy smiles even bigger seeing the candy. I imagine the money goes to his family. But, I bet the treat is going to be our secret. He quickly hugs me and I pat him on his firm little butt.

“Thank you sir. Thank you so much.” He says as he hugs me and I get my cheap thrill.

“You are very welcome young man.”
He races back inside to the somewhat warm art shop and I see him dancing around telling the lady. I see her look out the window and smile at me. I smile back and lift my hand in a wave and get in my car. What a sweet boy I think. Just so damn cute. I head back to the camp and the guards see my car and open the gate before I even stop. Of course they salute as I pass by, I head back to my little house and I glance at the time. I was gone less then an hour. I walk into my house, hang up my coat and uniform jacket. Put my cap on the top of the coat rack sit down in the kitchen and have another cup of coffee. After I finish this cup I pour another and take a sip. My coffee isn't too bad. But Anna's is a hell of a lot better. I walk on the porch and get my morning paper and after that I glance in at Ben. I'm starting to get a bit worried. Maybe he is sick. I certainly hope not. I have grown very accustomed to having him around me all the time. I know that I truly in my heart love him. I am certain he loves me too. Even his mother saw it. I sit down and read my paper. I am reading about all the new projects the government is proposing to get people to work. I wonder how much is true and whats bullshit. I get about halfway through the paper and Ben races from the bedroom to in front of me.

“Why didn't you wake me up?”

“I figured you needed your sleep.”
“But, you need me in the mornings.”
“Its Sunday. Anna is off work today remember.”
“I know who is going to make your coffee and toast?”
“I made it. Are you hungry?”
“Yeah I can make it though.” He says.

“No I will. You just go get your sugar and coffee I will make you some eggs.”

I get up and follow his naked little self out to the kitchen. How I do like to follow him. I pour him a cup of coffee and sit it in front of him. He puts an ungodly amount of sugar in it. I get out some eggs and heat up the skillet. I see when I get the eggs there are some nice looking steaks in there. I take one out and slice off about half and put it in the skillet. I fry it up nice to about medium rare and then plop it on a plate. I fry up two eggs and have two pieces of toast going for him as well. The toast and eggs are done at the same time. So I put it in front of him with a knife and fork. He looks at me.

“Why the steak?”
“Why not?” I say and shrug my shoulders.

He tears into it. One thing about boys is they are always ready to eat. I would say it is gone in seconds. But, the steak did last a good while. He would cut tiny pieces and savor each bite. He did enjoy it. The eggs though I think vanished, as did the toast. No matter how often we have meat which is most nights. He always takes his time with it. I guess its that way when you don't have something for ever and then you get it. I sit down and watch him finish after I wipe out the skillet and pour myself another coffee.

“I went to the art dealer today.”
“Did he like the paintings?”
“Yes very much.”
“Did he buy them?”
“Every one of them.”
He looks up from his plate and smiles at me.

“I told you that you had talent. I wish I could send you to art school.”
“I wish I could go.”
“Maybe in time.”
He goes back to eating and I go back to enjoying him enjoying his meal. When hes done he gets up and rinses off his plate and puts it in the sink.

“I think in a while we will go and see what we can find for Anna for her anniversary.”
“That will be fun I think.”

“I hate for you to get dressed as I love to watch you run around naked. But, you better because I told her to be here around noon time. So we better get going.”
He jumps to attention and salutes me.

“Yes Herr Major.” I laugh at his antics and he races off to get dressed.

A few minutes later he comes out with his black suit on. He says he likes it because he looks like me in it. I even got him a little black cap that is similar to mine. Except where I have a swastika on my arm he has the star of David. How I am learning to hate that little star. I have of course hated the damn swastika. But, it is the price I must pay at least at this time. He heads to the car and opens the door for me. I climb in and he rushes around and gets in the other side in the front seat. We take off and go to a shop and look around for an hour and find nothing. Ben got some nasty stares and I looked at those staring and they quickly stopped. We go to another shop and I find a beautiful lace table cloth. I am certain Anna will love it. It is very intricate and I can see her having it and cherishing it. Ben agrees she will enjoy it. I then go to the tobacco store and get some very nice pipe tobacco for her husband as I know he enjoys a good pipe a few times a day. I buy a couple cans.

“We should get them a cake.” Ben says when we get in the car.

“You think?”
“Yeah I think that way the whole family can enjoy the day.”
“I think you may be sweet on her daughters.” I say kidding him.

“No sir I only love you.”
“And your mother and sister.” I say.

“No not like that.” He says and blushes.

I push him on the shoulder playing.

He just giggles.

“A cake it is then.”
We head to the bakery once we arrive Ben tells me he has a stone in his boot and needs to get it out.

“That's fine once you get it out join me in the bakery.”
I go in and see a lovely cake that is perfect in the display. As I am telling the owner I want it. I hear a commotion outside. I hear Ben holler Major.

“I will be right back.” I race out to see whats going on. I see two young Privates pushing him back and forth between them making sport of him.

“WHAT THE HELL DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING TO MY VALET?” I scream at them. They are laughing and joking and turn to see me and are instantly at attention. I walk in front of them. I look them in their eyes and my nose is almost touching theirs as I do.

I scream again at them.

“DO YOU THINK ITS GOOD TO STOP MY VALET FROM HELPING ME?”

“No Her Major.” They both answer.

“Who Is your commanding officer?” I ask a bit more calmly but, with venom in my voice.

“Sergeant Schneider sir.” They respond almost whispering.

“Is that Fritz Schneider?”
“Yes Herr Major.”

“Let me see your papers.”
They both quickly fumble and pull them out. I look them over carefully. I take out a notebook and pencil and write down their information.

“I imagine you will be hearing from him tomorrow morning. Because I assure you that he will be hearing from me. I want you to take a very close look at this boy. If you EVER see him again I would suggest that you do anything he asks because it would be at my request.”
“Yes Herr Major.” They say weakly knowing that they are in deep shit.

“I SAID. DO YOU UNDERSTAND?”

“YES HERR MAJOR!!”
“I suggest you get your asses back to the base immediately. I wouldn't waste a moments time.” I say with hatred in my voice.

I hand them back their papers and turn on my heels and walk back into the bakery my boy a step behind me. I hear one of them say to the other.

“We are in big trouble.”
I think. You have no fucking idea how much.

“Yes sir I have the cake in a box for you.”

“Thank you very much sir”. I see Ben eyeing a cream puff and I say to the shop keeper.

“I believe I will have two of those luscious looking creme puffs as well.

“Yes Herr Major.”The man says with a smile. I see the man wink at Ben, and Ben try not to smile. I think he may be like me loving a young boy. Or just seeing a boy being treated to a nice thing. Whatever it is I like this man instantly. I am sure he will be getting more business from me very soon.

Ben and I leave and Ben is carrying the box with the puffs and I look around and the two privates are no where to be seen. Good for them at least they aren't completely stupid. We get back to the camp and the gate as usual opens quickly for me and I get the standard salute. I cant lie I do like people to show me respect like this. But, I hate how I got it, and why.

Once we get back Ben and I carry the gifts and our treats inside.

“I am going to get you some coffee sir.” Ben says.

“That would be nice. Thank you. Do you want your treat now or save it for after dinner or lunch?”
He thinks a moment cocking his head to the side a bit as he does when he ponders something difficult.

“I think after lunch it will be better.”
I smile.

“So it will be then.”
He carries the lovely puffs in and sits them on the table. I sit in the chair and turn on the radio. Ach the Fuhrer is speaking so who knows how long this will be. Could be minutes or hours. Long winded fool loves to hear his own voice. I think. I switch it off because that is all that will be on. I sit down and am thinking a few minutes. I pick up the phone and call Sargent Schneider's camp.

A lady answers the phone.

“Training Camp.”
“This is Major Hans Lechter of the SS and I need to speak to Sargent Fritz Schneider right now.” I command.

“He is in his barracks Her Major.” She says.

“I didn't ask where he was. I want to speak to him this instant.” I snap at her.

“Yes Herr Major. One moment please.”
I hold the phone and watch the seconds tick by on my clock. In three minutes a breathless Sargent gets on the phone.

“Sargent Fritz Schneider sir.”

“You know who I am?”
“Yes Major Lechter sir.”
“I want you at my quarters in twenty minutes. If you are late there will be hell to pay. Do you understand me?” I say with that venomous voice that makes others assholes pucker.

“Yes Herr Major.”
I slam down the phone. Ben returns a couple minutes later and sits a cup of coffee on the table beside me and sits up on my lap.

“Sweet heart in a few minutes a sergeant will be here and you will have to act as people expect of you like when we are in the office.

“Yes sir.”
I take a sip of coffee. I look at him.

“Is Anna here. I told her to take the day off.”
“No sir I made it.”
“You made it?” I ask questioning him with a smile on my face.

“Yes sir. Anna taught me how. She says your coffee isn't good enough to wash a car with because it would probably take off the paint.”

I laugh uproariously at his comment.

“Its not that bad.” I say still giggling.

“Its not that good either.” He says laughing.

“No I suppose its not. Anna does make great coffee that's for sure. I'm glad she taught you. I think that I am going to start giving her off every Saturday so she can spend Shabat with her family.”
Ben smiles. “I think she would like that sir.”
“I do too. So I will make it happen.”
We chat and have some fun banter and I hear a knock at the door and I glance at the clock and its been exactly seventeen minutes.

“Go answer the door Ben. Then make yourself scarce.”

He nods and goes and answers the door.

“Sergeant Schneider to see Major Lechter.”
“This way Sergeant.” Ben says politely and leads him into the living room.

I stay seated and he extends his hand. I ignore it. I just glare at him boring into his soul or so it would appear.

“Is that the way you teach your men to greet an officer?”
He quickly snaps to attention and salutes.

“Sergeant Schneider reporting as ordered Herr Major.” He snaps out.

I return the salute and pull out my notebook. He remains at attention.

“Do you know these men?” I ask saying their names.

“Yes Herr Major they are under my command.”

“An old Prussian saying is that a soldiers actions reflect his commanding officer. I believe that. Do you?” I ask with the venom still in my voice.

“Yes Herr Major.” He answers knowing he damn well better answer that way.

“So these men reflect you is that correct?”

“They are new Herr Major.” He says trying to cover his ass.

“I'm certain that's not what I asked.” I say standing up at this point. I am furious now. I hate someone trying to pass the buck as the Yankees say.

I am in his face my nose touching his.

“No Herr Major.”
“No they don't reflect you?”
“Yes Herr Major.”
“I'm not stupid. Do you think I'm stupid? Are you trying to confuse me?”
“No Herr Major.”
“So do their actions reflect your teachings?”
“Yes Herr Major.”

“I figured as much. Did they report to you after they met me in the street?”
“Yes Herr Major. I assure you...”
“YOU DON'T ASSURE ME OF ANYTHING!!!”
“Yes Herr Major.”

“Did they tell you what they did?”
“Yes Herr Major.”
I sit back down in my chair and take a sip of coffee. I light a cigarette and let him stew in his fear a moment. I smoke nearly half of my cigarette as he waits for my next words.

I look up at him and rub my nose as it itched.

“What pray tell did they tell you?”
“Herr Major they said they saw a very well dressed Jewish boy and they thought it was odd and they said they began making sport of him.”
“Did they mention that this boy got out of a staff car belonging to me?”
“No Herr Major they did not.”
“Did they mention that he was my valet?”
“Yes Herr Major they did.”
“How many well dressed and well groomed Jewish boys do you see in the city nowadays?”
He thinks for a moment before answering.

“None Herr Major.”
“So if you were to see a well dressed Jewish boy in the streets today would you not think he belonged to someone IMPORTANT?”

“I would think so yes Herr Major.”

“You think so?” I say emphasizing the think. “I question if you can think. Or if the men under you can think. What do you think Corporal?”
“Herr Major I am a Sergeant.”
“Are you?”
“I was Herr Major I hope I still am.”
“We will see about that.”
I see the mans lip quiver. I can tell his rank is very important to him. I also know of him and he is a career man. He has been in the military since he was eighteen and he is probably early forties now.

“Benjamin, I want you to put on your coat and cap and come out here.”

A moment later Ben appears as he was on the street.

“I want you to look at this boy. You see his suit costs more then you make in a month correct?”
“Yes Herr Major.”
“You can see his boots are also worth your monthly salary correct?”

He glances.

“Yes Herr Major.”
“You can see his boots are better polished then yours correct?”
“Yes Herr Major.”

“See how my boots are very perfectly polished?”
“Yes Herr Major.”
“My boy here is amazing when it comes to shining boots. He presses my shirts equally as well. He takes care of my needs and he helps me with tasks like today. His duties to me are invaluable. Worth more then your two soldiers are worth to the Third Reich. Do you think it is wise to fuck with him?”

“Absolutely not Herr Major.”

“When you see him appear at your doorway anytime in the future what will you think?”
“Not to fuck with him sir and to do exactly as he says Herr Major.”
“I think you are a Sergeant as I can tell you aren't a stupid man.”

I can see his shoulders release a bit with relief.

“I want those two idiots at my office tomorrow morning at 7 am sharp. If I am not there they are to wait. Is that clear?”
“Yes Herr Major.”
“Benjamin you are free to go back to your tasks.”
Ben the good boy he is clicks his heels.

“Yes Herr Major.” Then walks back to the bedroom where only god knows what he is doing. Probably looking at his new paints. At least I hope so.

“I will be taking those two men for a while for their punishment. Is that clear?”
“Yes Herr Major.”

I stand up and go to the kitchen to get another cup of coffee making him wait at attention as I do. I come back and sit back down and take a sip.

“Dismissed.” I say with a wave of my hand.

He snaps his salute up and I return it and he is out the door like a shot.

Ben walks back into the room.

“I don't think I would want to be them in a few minutes.” Ben says.

“No I don't think their lives will be pleasant for a while.” I say smiling at him. “They deserve it for treating my love so poorly.”
“You wont shoot them will you.”
“No silly. But, they may wish I would.”

“Are you going to have them beaten?”
“No I cant do that. It is against he law for an officer to strike an enlisted man. But, I would like to.”

“I was so scared when they were picking on me.”
I hold out my hands for him to come to me.
“I know you were. I am certain they will be as scared as you were and for much longer. I assure you that it will get around very quickly not to mess with you among all the men.”

“Thank you Hans.” He says and kisses me.

I kiss him back of course and I hold him for a good while just enjoying his being with me.

“Why don't you turn on the radio and see if the wind bag is done yammering to himself yet.” I say to him and scoot him off my lap. He turns it on and as the tubes warm up. I can hear he is done and its a song playing.

“I always liked that song.” I say.

“I can play it.”
“Really? Let me hear it. I am sure its better when you play it.”
He goes and gets his violin and starts playing with the song.
“No from the beginning.” I say and get up and turn the radio down so we cant hear it but not off so we don't have to wait for the tubes to warm up. He starts from the beginning and I sit down and enjoy it. I feel like I melt as he plays every time. He plays with such grace and beauty its like the notes tickle your mind, and soul. He plays it in its entirety and as always I love when he plays.

“Please play another.”
“What do you want to hear?”
“Whatever you desire.”
He plays a lovely little song and halfway through I hear a knock at the door.

“Now who the Hell could that be?”
I go and answer the door and it is Anna and her family.

“Oh please come in.” I say and step aside so they can enter.

“Herr Major my family wanted to come and thank you for allowing me to have the day off.” Anna says.

I smile at her and her family.

“Anna I have discussed it with Benjamin and decided that from now on you will take off Shabbat to be with your family. So from sundown on Friday until Sunday morning you are off of work.”

“Oh Herr Major.” She says smiling.
“Especially since you taught Benjamin to make coffee since mine eats car paint.” I say laughing.

She smiles and covers her smile with her hand like some women do. Her daughters giggle too.

Her husband just smiles and says. “She says the same about mine.”

“Please come in and sit a few minutes please.” I say motioning them into the living room.

They all walk in and sit together on the sofa. Ben and I sit on the chair him next to me. I put my arm around him as normal. He puts his hand on my leg and we talk a few minutes about how they are enjoying their day. The adults talk for a while and the children listen as they did in those times.

“Ben go and get Anna and her husband their gifts from us.”
“Oh Sir you shouldn't have.” Anna's husband says.

“It is my pleasure. Anna does so much for me.”
“Sir you already do so much more for us then we could ever hope for.” He replies.

Ben comes back in holding Anna's gift I had wrapped in tissue paper. Her husbands is in a medium sized brown bag. He hands them their packages.

“You first my bride.”

She carefully opens the tissue paper to reveal the table cloth.

“Oh my it is so lovely.” She says lightly fingering it. She stands up to unfold it to get a better look.

“Oh momma it is so pretty. It has roses in it. You love roses.” Her youngest daughter says.

The other two lightly touch it and admire the beauty in it.

“Oh Herr Major thank you so much. But, you shouldn't have. I will cherish it my entire life.”
“I hope that's a very long time.” I reply.

She carefully folds it back and wraps the tissue paper around it to protect it.

“Now you my love.” She says to her husband.

He opens the bag and lets out a hearty laugh.

He pulls out one of the cans of tobacco and shows Anna. Who in turn laughs as well.

I look at them confused.

“Herr Major. This is the brand I used to smoke before well you know. It is my favorite. It is the only kind Anna doesn't say smells terrible. I will enjoy every pipe full and thank you to Hashheem for every pipe full.”
I just smile.

“Benjamin go in my coat pocket and get the gifts for the girls.” He looks at me funny but, does as he is told. He comes back with four chocolate bars.

He hands one to each girls and has one left and looks at me funny.

“Who is this one for?” He asks.

“You silly.”
He smiles. The girls hold the bars just looking at them in admiration. It seems at the exact same time the girls pull back the paper covering them and break off one piece and put it in their mouths. I watch and they don't chew it. They allow it to melt on their tongues and savor the flavor. They close their eyes and I can see they are in heaven feeling and tasting the chocolate melt on their young tongues. The oldest as she enjoys her piece offers some to her mother and father.

“No sweetie you enjoy it.” Anna says.

After their pieces melt they fold the paper over the bar and put it in their dress pockets. I think to myself it they are so happy with one piece and save the rest for a later time I will have to make sure I send some home with Anna more frequently. I think on Friday before she leaves every week I will send home a couple bars for each girl. I think they would be happy about that I smile to myself. Ben hasn't even touched his he has set it on the table.

“I suppose we should be going Herr Major.” Anna says.

“Benjamin go and get the other gift for the family.”
He does as asked as always and returns with the cake box. He hands it to Anna. She opens the top and smiles.

“Herr Major you are so good to us.”
“Anna I wish I could do it for more people. But, as you know I cant.”
“I know sir.”
“What is it momma?”
“Its a lovely cake.” She says and shows the family.

“Oh my. We are going to get fat now.” Her middle daughter says.

I laugh at that as they do as well. The irony of her saying that. Granted they eat better then most. I send as much as I can home with Anna. But, it really isn't enough to feed five people well. I wish it was but, I cant over do it either. I know that Anna buys some things on the black market on things she does for me I slip her some money for. But, both of us would be in trouble if anyone found out. Even her husband doesn't know about that. Neither does Ben. It is our secret.

They get up to leave and the girls all give me a hug before we get to the door. Anna then gives me a hug and I was a bit surprised that her husband did as well. I of course embraced them all and loved the hugs and the appreciation. I always feel like a turd after because I want to do more. They know it too not that I feel bad but, they know I wish I could do more.

They go home and I find out they enjoyed their evening together.

Before Anna left she offered to make our lunch. I absolutely refused her generosity. I told her Ben and I can manage one day a week. She wondered if we could.

Once she left Ben and I went to the kitchen and I got out some white bread and made us some nice sandwiches with left over roast. Ben and I can do OK. After lunch he got his cream puff. And put it on a plate and put another on a plate for me.

“Here you go sir.” He says putting it on the table in front of me.

“You know I don't really feel like having this now. Put it in the bread box for me for later please.”
“OK.” So that's what he does.

After he finishes he goes and gets me a cigarette and I sit and enjoy it.

“Ben why don't you go and see your family today and say hello for me.”

He climbs up on my lap and looks me in the face and puts his hand on my cheek.

“Herr Major?”
“Yes?”
“Please don't think I don't appreciate your gifts because I truly do. But, Would it be alright if I take my sister and mother the candy?”

I smile at him.

“Of course you may. I wish I would have thought of that. I will get more next time so they may have one and you as well. Forgive me for being so stupid and not thinking of them.”
“You are not stupid sir. You are very kind especially in this time.” He says and kisses my cheek.

“I love you.” He says.

“I love you too. Now go and see your family.” I order him. He hops off my lap and salutes me.

“You scoundrel. Be back before dark so I don't worry.”
“Yes Herr Major.” He says intimidating the Sergeant from earlier. I laugh at him. He goes and gets his coat and cap and slides the candy in his pocket.

After he leaves I think of the little boys next door his mother and sister are feeding. I should send one for them too. Fuck I think I am going to need to buy a box a week at this rate. But, dammit its worth it to make some kids happy. Because isn't that what its about making kids happy?

I go into the living room after I pour myself a cup of coffee. I start to read and just cant get into it. I turn on the radio and its just not interesting. I'm missing my boy. He is like a drug to me I think. I am so happy when he is here. I miss him terribly when he is gone. I go to my bedroom and put the money I got earlier into my safe. I don't have many things in there as I don't have really anything of any value. I take of my uniform jacket and lay on the bed. I stare at the picture he drew of us and as I do I doze off for a while. When I wake up I go back into the living room and take off my boots. I sit in my chair and just think what life could be like if I took Ben and his family to Argentina. I hear that some people are going there. It could be wonderful I think. I think of Ben and me playing on the beaches and chasing after each other. His mother and sister happy and laughing. It would be wonderful. But, I know if I am caught well we are caught. If I'm lucky I will end up in prison. They will be shot. I cant imagine that. Poor Benjamin shot is too much for me to bare to think about. I put the thoughts of escaping to Argentina out of my mind. Its not worth the risk. Here I can keep them safe. Unless I do something stupid. I don't do stupid things I keep my books straight. I don't pilfer like many others do. I know what would happen if I am caught. Hell by the time I get my funds its probably already half what it should be people are so greedy it seems. As the sun is beginning to set Ben comes in his cheeks are rosy from the cold. He takes off his coat and cap. He removes his now muddy boots and sits them by the door. He sees mine are there as well. He takes it as a hint and starts to polish mine up. I didn't mean it to be a hint. But, it is his job kind of and he does enjoy doing things for me as I do for him. So I don't complain. What I really want is him to come and be with me. I have missed him.

Once he is done with mine he puts them in the bedroom. He is in there a few minutes and comes back out naked as a jay bird. He then scrubs the mud from his and gives them a good polish. Once he is done he comes in front of me. I close my book I have read the same page fifteen times and gotten nothing from it since he got home. He climbs up and gives me a kiss on the cheek.

“I missed you sir”

“I missed you too.”I say kissing his cheek.

“My mom is excited and hoping you can get her some work making dresses.”
“I am hoping so too. I don't know how it will work. But, I will try that's all I can say. I cant promise it will happen. But, I promise I will try.”
“That's more then we had hope for.”
“Yeah.” I say and put my arm around my little guy.

“So how is your sister?”
“She is doing so much better. She gave the neighbor boys half of her chocolate bar.”
“I bet they were happy about that.”
“They were so thankful they offered to clean my moms apartment.”
“I wish I could help all the people here. Especially the children. No one deserves to be treated like this.”
“I know you would sir. I don't think before all of this they really had too much.”
“Yeah and the Jews controlled all the money right.” I say disgusted with the situation.

“That's what they say. But, if it were true we wouldn't have been so poor.”
“Yeah ain't that a kick in the head. But, stupid or desperate people will believe any lie they are told. So long as its not their fault they will eat it up.”
He just nods solemnly.

“Do you feel like painting? I know its been a busy day.”
“I really do. But, I figured you would want me with you.”
“No you go paint if you want. I don't want to keep you from something you enjoy.”
“I enjoy being with you.”
“I know you do sweet heart.” I say and kiss the top of his head. “Go paint for a while and when you are done we will have some dinner OK?”
He smiles at me. He is such a good boy I think. He goes in the bedroom which is kind of becoming his art studio. Its just easier that way then dragging all of his painting things out to the living room. I start to read a while and decide to go in and just sit on the bed and watch him. It is always so neat to do that. I get up and walk in the bedroom and lay back on the bed and prop myself up with pillows. I watch as he looks at what he has so far. He puts his fist up to his chin and looks. He cocks his head back and forth and drops his hand. He takes the brush up and makes a few strokes. I watch and its like a light goes on in his eyes and he smiles. He then starts to really go at it. His brush is flying across the canvas and its is really starting to take shape. I think it is absolutely amazing to watch because I have zero artistic ability and to watch someone that does is such a treat. After an hour he is done. It is a mountain view and it is snowing and the peaks of the mountains far off are topped with snow. It is truly lovely. But, anything he does is amazing in my opinion. He could draw stick figures and I would think its amazing. But, I am kind of partial because I love him. The art dealer isn't so partial and he loves his “my” work. Once he is done he cleans his brushes and puts them up. He turns around and is startled to see me.

“I didn't know you were there.”
“I have been here about an hour.”
“Really?”
“Yeah really. I love to watch you work.”
“You should have said something.”
“No I didn't want to interrupt your thoughts.”
He smiles.

“You ready for something to eat?”
“Yes sir.”
I get up and put my house shoes back on and we walk into the kitchen. Once there I heat up some of the gravy Anna had left over and then heated some of the roast as well. I put the roast on some bread and poured gravy over it. I then put some potatoes on the plates as well. He poured us both a glass of milk and we sit down to eat. He takes a bite.

“You cook pretty good.”
“No I didn't cook anything I just heated up what Anna made.”
“Its still pretty good.” He says and smiles.

We eat in silence as become our custom. I am glad he is enjoying it as much as I am. Its a nice meal and filling as well. Once we are done he gets up and rinses off our plates as become the custom.

“Why don't you eat that cream puff I don't really feel like anything sweet today.”
“Are you sure? I had one already and it wouldn't be fair.”
“I am certain. You have it and enjoy it.”
He smiles at me and gets the cream puff from the bread box. He had already put it on a plate. He sits down and hops up and races into the living room. He comes back with a cigarette and the lighter for me.

“It would have been rude of me to make you wait for your cigarette.”
“No its fine. Now enjoy your treat.”
He takes a bite and its so adorable I think that his face is covered in the cream. As he eats it with his eyes closed and I can tell he is truly enjoying it. I should get him some more often I think. I think I will. He deserves them. Its not really making up for what has happened to him and his family. But, it makes it a little better. Or so I hope.

Once he is done he wipes his face clean and rinses off the plate. I am just finishing my cigarette and I snuff it out and we go to the living room.

“Can we listen to the radio?”
“Sure I know the program about the family is on you like so much starts soon.”
So he turns it on and the tubes warm up. It seems like it takes forever. Once it starts to play it is the show before just ending. Neither of us like that program its all about nationalism. Neither of us cares to hear that garbage. The show starts and he is sitting in front of the radio on the floor staring up at it. I just listen and watch him. It is a really funny program and the mom is always trying some scheme that never works out just right. The dad is always mad at her. But, a funny mad and the kids always try to talk her out of the plan. It is always a funny show and I love to hear Ben laugh. He has a very pleasant laugh and it makes me happy to hear it. Once its over its a music show. Its nice to listen to. Its a lot of jazz and its different to listen to. I like it and Ben seems to appreciate different kind of music too. Soon it is over and the clock chimes nine. He gets up and turns off the radio and goes to start our bath. I go in and disrobe and he comes in to hang up my uniform pants and once I am undressed he goes to the bath and climbs in. I get in behind him and he looks at me and starts to wash my face.

“I wonder what you would look like with a beard?”
“I have no idea. I cant have one and since I have been in the military since I was eighteen I have never had one.”
“Seems silly to me.”
“I don't make the rules I just have to follow them.”
“I think you would be handsome with one.”

“Yeah hide my hideous face right?” I say teasing him.

“I think you are very pretty.” He says as he gently rubs the cloth on my face.

“I think you are more handsome then any boy I have ever seen.”
“Your just saying that.”
“I don't know. But, I do know I love you and think the world of you.”
He smiles then starts cleaning my neck and chest. Once he is done he scoots behind me and cleans my shoulders and back. Then washes my hair. Feeling his little fingers massage my scalp is simply divine. It is one of the best parts of my day that is for certain. Once he is done I stand and he gets the rest of me. I sit back down and he gets in front of me as usual and I wash his face neck and chest. He turns and I wash his hair, shoulders and back. As usual he sticks his bum in the air. I slowly insert a finger and he moans in delight. I start tickling his insides.

“Put in another finger.” He says. Actually orders. So I do as he asks and he moans as I feel his tight little hole stretch out to accommodate my fingers. He scoots forward my fingers slipping out of him. He turns around and he climbs on my chest and starts kissing me. I put my fingers back to their home this time of night and slip them back in. He is pressing is cock against my belly as I insert my fingers and toy with his inner button. He is moaning and panting. He starts kissing my neck. I can see his face as I am doing this for the first time. It has the look of pure pleasure on it. Doing this always turned me on. But, seeing his face and him rubbing his cock up and down my belly is so erotic. I soap my cock with my free hand and start to stroke myself. I cant stand it anymore I pull out my fingers and touch the head of my cock to his pucker and he pushes down against it thinking its my fingers. The head pushes in and its a bit bigger then my two fingers. He lets out a bit of a yelp at the bigger intrusion. But, realizes what it is and smiles with just his lips and pushes down a bit more. About half of my cock slides in and I can tell he is in a bit of pain.

“Stop if it hurts.” I say to him hoping and praying he doesn't because it is the most amazing feeling I have had in my life. He starts to slide up and it almost pops out. Then he slides slowly back down. He waits a minute at least and then does it again. He slides it half way and then starts to go up and down slowly on half of my cock. He is starting to press his cock into my tummy again as he does. He is sliding up and down and it is amazing feeling his tightness gripping my cock as he does this. He slides up and down for several minutes and I feel his ass pulse around my cock and he starts panting and moaning as he pushes into my belly with his hard rocket. I know he is having his feelings as I have felt it on my fingers. I cant stand it and I start to pump into him as he is hunching my belly. I stroke in and out of his tight hole quickly and he seems to cum longer and harder then ever before. I let out a guttural moan as I shoot my load into him. I pump into him like a mad man as I unleash my load into him. I feel my cock pulse several times as it shoots into him. He is still moaning and I feel his hole continue tightening around my rod as I shoot into him. After I shoot my last shot into him I give a few more strokes to enjoy the after cum feelings. I slow down and he has stopped himself. I stop after about ten or fifteen more pumps. I just sit there and my eyes are closed and I am basking in the after glow. He wraps his arms around me me and lays his head on my chest. My cock is still nestled in its happy new home as he does. I feel it bounce a few times as he does this. I cant even talk as I am thinking I am about to pass out from the pleasure. After a minute or two. I can finally speak.

“I am sorry. I didn't mean to do that I just couldn't hardly stop myself.”
He doesn't say anything just lifts his head and kisses my lips, then puts his head back on my chest. We sit like that for I would guess five minutes and my cock never goes down. It is as hard as it has ever been. I have my eyes closed and am thinking that it is the absolute best orgasm I have ever had and I thought I knew how it would feel making love to him. Boy was I way wrong. It was better then anything I had ever imagined. As I am thinking these things I think he has dozed off.

“Can we do it again but, in the bed?” He says softly.

“I am afraid it will hurt you.”
He lifts his head and looks at me with glazed over eyes.

“Hurt? It is the best I have ever felt. Please can we?”

I slowly remove my cock from him and its just feels so sad now that its free of its new home. He gets out and gets a towel and dries himself off. Then hands me a towel. I dry off and wrap the towel around me and he gets into the bed and climbs under the covers. I go to the kitchen and get some oil because I know we will need something to let it slide in and out easily. I go to the bedroom and remove the towel and climb into the bed sitting the oil on the night stand. I lay down and he is on top of me in an instant. My cock has never rested. It is still as hard as stone. I get the oil and rub some on his love button and smear some on my cock. He lifts it up and aims it at his hole and slips back onto it. The head pops through the barrier with little resistance. It is so tight and so warm and feels so right.

“I love you Hans.”

“Ben I love you more then I have ever loved anyone.” I say and mean it every word.

“I know you were so sad before.”

I feel his hard little cock against my belly and he starts to slide more of my cock into him. He gets it about half way in and starts to slide back and forth. He is laying with me chest to chest his legs bent up next to me.

“Wait a moment.” I say.

I grab the oil and have him lift up a bit and pour a bit on my belly and put it back. He starts to slide up and down and starts moaning.

“Oh that's so much better.” He says and starts to slide more eagerly. I can feel he is getting more of my cock into him on each slide in and out. Before long my cock is about three fourths of the way into him and he isn't slowing down a bit. He is starting to sweat and his hair is starting to drip form it. He is moaning and groaning as am I. I start to lift up my hips and meet his downward thrust. Before long my cock is completely buried in him. Once it is he lifts up and is vertical to me and starts riding my cock. His cock is so hard I cant stand it I reach out and grab it and start stroking the lovely thing. He cums almost instantly and I feel his ass gripping my cock as he does. I feel the pulses in his cock and his ass. It is amazing to feel. I am slamming up into him as he has his orgasm. I want to cum as he is and am really trying to. It sadly doesn't happen at the same times as it did last time. After he is coming down I grab his hips and I hold him with my entire cock in him. I get out of bed and lay him across it and standing start to pump into him. I can see his entire body racked with pleasure as I pump into him. I start rubbing his cock again and am toying with his balls. I am so hot and so ready and it feels so good. But, it isn't ready to cum yet as I just did it will take a moment I am sure. I am sweating massive amounts as I pour my love into him. I lift his legs up and put his feet to his head and lean into him and start kissing his mouth has I pump into his lovely hole. I am hammering away hard and fast. I feel him starting to tighten up and his ass starts to milk my cock as he is going off again. I slide my tongue into his mouth and as I do he is moaning around my tongue and I unleash my love into him and shot so hard I am sure he can taste it. I let out six good ropes into him. I have several aftershocks of my orgasm as I slowly pump into him afterwards. I am in pure ecstasy. I slow down and stop. I let his legs go and he puts them over the side of the bed and I collapse on top of him but try not to put my full weight onto him.

After I catch my breath I look him in the eyes.

“That was amazing.”
“Yeah.” is all he says.

After a moment I find some strength from deep inside of me and I slide out my now softening cock from him. I lift up and scoot him over onto the bed in the proper sleeping position. I slip in next to him. He turns on his side and wraps his arm over my chest and lays his head on my chest.

“Hans?”
“Yes?”
“Can we do that every night?”

I look him in the eyes to makes sure he is being true or if he is trying to make me happy. I decide he is being true.

“Benjamin we can do that anytime you want.”
He smiles at me.

“Good.”
We lay there a few minutes just enjoying being close to each other and at some point nod off and find sleep easily. I have never slept so peacefully or as deep as I did that night. I could have died at that point and would have been fine with it. I was with my love and I was so happy.