Date: Thu, 15 Sep 2005 23:36:23 -0400 From: Henry Higgins Subject: nevermore--part 5 5--Caught in the Stark Light of Day Someone seemed to be shining a flashlight in my face. Even though my bedroom had window shades, one little crack would throw a narrow beam of sunlight across my bed at that time of year and frequently awaken me around 7:30 in the morning. Of course, sometimes my bladder awakened me before that. But on that morning, it was the beam of light that pulled me from one of the most restful sleeps I'd had in a long time, even though it had been short. I didn't even have to pee very badly, so I just lay there to let myself come to consciousness gradually. I felt so warm and cozy. My morning wood felt tight in my groin--a good, warm kind of tight. As the previous day's events came back to mind, I remembered the wonderful, funky aroma of the boy I had brought home from the park--not for sex, but to care for because he was sick. Eyes still closed, I relished that aroma along with his beauty. I thought maybe I'd just have a morning wank to shore up my control for later on, when I'd have to deal with him. As I reached down to grab my erection, I was suddenly jarred to find something already grabbing it. Startled, I opened my eyes wide to discover Kenny in my bed with his hand firmly wrapped around my woody. No wonder I remembered the funky aroma so well--it was right there in bed with me! "What are you doing!" I exclaimed, not yet fully awake. "Mmmm... So nice," Kenny mumbled. He was in bed with me, his limbs intertwined with mine, and firmly grasping the base of my erect penis. I removed his hand from my shaft, leaving my penis waving about, still stiff, but feeling definitely more alone in the world. "Whatcha do that for?" he asked. "I'll explain it later," I said, "but for now, we can't do that." He came fully awake and peered at me with concern. "But... You said you're gay." "I am. And Kenny, I'll have to explain it later. But right now, we can't do this." "Okay, man; whatever. There I go fucking up again!" I hugged him to me. "Kenny, you didn't fuck up at all! It's me that's fucked up, and I need to explain that to you. But it takes a while and I can't do it right now. Could you be patient with me until we get up and wash and get something to eat?" His frown relaxed. "Sure, Jim. I'm sorry. I really didn't want to freak you; I just wanted you to feel good--and me, too." "And you did. You felt so good. You don't know how hard it is for me to stop you. But I must. I'll tell you about it later, okay?" "Yeah, Whatever," he said in that flip tone of voice that kids sometimes use to avoid betraying their feelings. Only then did I fully realize that Kenny and I were naked together in bed, and that he was as hard as I was. What a fucking waste of good erections! Shit! Damn you, Roger Hansen! What an asshole! Yeah, right. I knew immediately that I was the one who was the asshole. I had gotten myself into this fix. And here I was, boned to the max, with a lovely boy in bed with me who was equally boned, and I was stopping it. Suddenly it all got too surreal for me; I had to move. So I threw the covers back and saw him naked, and next to me, and shit! He was just so gorgeous! But I couldn't follow my instincts right then. I did notice as I got out of bed that any trace of his fever seemed to be gone. And, yes, he added length when he boned and it stood straight out from his belly, ending in one of the most perfectly formed dickheads I had seen in a long time. As I rolled out, I said, "I've gotta get up, man. Otherwise, I'm gonna do something I'm sure I'll regret. I think we both need a shower. Wanna shower together?" What? Was I a glutton for punishment? No. I was testing myself. I couldn't care for this boy without having some idea of my limits. I noticed that the sloppy grin was back on Kenny's face. "You bet, Jim. It's just that I'm kinda... well, confused. First we can't play in bed and now you're asking me to shower with you." Oops. I hadn't thought about that. Now what? "Oh, Kenny! I think I'm as confused as you are. I'm sorry. Please be patient with me. I think you'll understand a little more once we have a chance to talk about it at breakfast." "Okay, Jim--no sweat." He sniffed his armpits. "Eew, gross! How could you stand me like that?" The boy got out of bed and came to stand beside me. "I don't know, man. I guess it's just your winning personality." Now it was my turn for the silly grin. I slapped him playfully on his cute little bare ass as we made our way into my bathroom, boners leading the way. Sheesh! Would they never go down? Him, I could understand; but what was going on with me? I felt like I was seventeen again. I took a fresh towel and washcloth from the linen closet and hung them on the towel rack for Kenny. Then I turned on the water in my special shower-hot-tub combination. "Wow! Jim! I don't think I've ever seen one this nice. I'll bet you've gotten it on with lotsa guys in here." "That's for me to know and you to find out, nosey." My silly grin was still there; so was his. "Man, you're worse than some bitches I know!" Kenny punched me playfully in the arm. "Like I say, you'll find out more shortly. Meanwhile, let's get ourselves cleaned up, okay?" I checked the water temperature to make sure it was okay and then held the door open for him to enter the tub enclosure. "No hot tub stuff for us now. We've got to get cleaned up and then fix some breakfast, so there's no time for hot tub." "Whatever you say, man. But Jim? Could you wash me? That's not sex, is it?" There was that boundary, again. But I didn't think Kenny was trying to seduce me then. It felt more like he wanted some human touch and caring. That's what I'd promised myself to provide him. "Yeah, I'd be happy to do that. And even though that sometimes leads to sex for me, I don't think it's going to right now." Could this really be me saying this? Me? The horniest goat on my block? "Great! My mom used to do that when I was little. It felt so, um, close and cozy. You know what I mean?" "I know exactly what you mean," I answered. "My aunt used to do the same for me when I was small. Tell you what... Not only will I wash you, I'll dry you off, too!" "Great, Jim." The grin grew even wider. I took a shower pouf, put a couple of squirts of shower gel on it, and then rubbed it between my hands to work up a rich lather. Then I moved Kenny so that he was out of the direct shower spray, and began to soap him all over. He was like a little kid with this; I could see that he loved it. Carefully, lovingly, I took a soapy hand and rubbed it over his face as he closed his eyes. Next, I guided him under the shower spray to rinse his face. I progressed to his neck, shoulders, back, and tummy--rubbing gently with my hands and carefully to make sure all his nooks and crannies were clean. He giggled. "That tickles!" "Good," I said. "I need a good laugh." I was heading into tougher territory--his gorgeous penis still stood at attention. I soaped his whole pelvic area lightly with the pouf and then used just my hands to reach under his scrotum into his crotch, back out along each groin, and then just behind his glans to clean the crease. I was careful just to clean, not to stroke. Kenny seemed aware of my intent, because he made no move to get me to stroke him. Having navigated the dangerous area, it was no problem at all for me to finish up on his legs and feet, returning to take a swipe at his butt crack, and then rinsing him in the warm spray. He looked at me again with a piercing look. "What?" I asked. Uh oh, his eyes were filling up again. "Nobody's EVER touched me the way you just did, Jim--not even my mom!" "We DO need to talk, kiddo. Is that saying you liked it?" "I LOVED it!" he fairly shouted. Once more, Kenny threw his arms around me to hug me tightly, not paying the slightest bit of attention to my lonely, stiff penis waving about--nor to his own. "Great!" I said. "Maybe I can teach you to do that for me." "Yeah, bozo! As if!" Hey, this kid was catching on. Or... Wait a minute! Maybe I was the one who was catching on. I quickly sudsed his hair with shampoo, rinsed it out, and then rubbed in a little herbal conditioner, which I intended to leave in. The boy's eyes were closed and his face conveyed a look of the utmost contentment, as I felt just a little more hopeful that I might just be able to carry this off. "Okay, now I get to do you," he said. "I'll take a rain check. Aren't you hungry?" I asked. He nodded vigorously. "Starving!" "Well, if you'll chill for just a minute, I'll get me cleaned up and then we can dry off, get dressed, and get some breakfast." "Why don't we just eat in the nude?" he asked. Uh oh. There it was again. "Because that's why I have to talk with you. You'll see. Maybe another day--but today, we ought to be covered," I said. "Okay, man; whatever you say." Absent-mindedly, Kenny's hand went down to his erection, not to stroke it purposefully, but to caress it gently. I noticed this out of the corner of my eye, but I didn't react.