Author’s Note: Earlier, I indicated that people get “religion” when faced with death. Please keep your mind broad when I use the term, for its root meaning is “sacred things,” and that need not have anything to do with any “ists,” “isms,” or churches. Here’s a sacred thing: I cannot tell you the number of times I heard it said, “I wish I had not been so serious. I wish I played more and worked less. I wish I ate more ice cream.”

These guys are not “serious.” They play. They do not miss out on the ice cream.

Unemployment Compensation

When they returned to camp, the grounds had many more campers. That, per Nathan’s observation, was how it often was when the weekend came. Their neighbors were still there. Adrian, after checking to make sure his bike was still in the tent, for he had been worried about that, immediately dashed over to visit with them. Nathan went to refill the water from the spring. Moonlyte and her group had left, only to be replaced by a new group of whom Nathan’s first impression was ‘thuggish.’ All white, an old pickup and a dirty van, many tattoos, wild kids, too large of a fire, heavy metal, circa ’79 music, beer, and loud, loud talking.

He nodded and smiled as he passed through, holding up his jugs.

The people were pleasant enough, however. One of the guys, a big, bearded, biker-looking fellow, toasted him with a beer and commented about it being the best water for miles. Several little kids followed him and talked excitedly about seeing a rattlesnake in the river bed, saying they had thrown rocks at it, but missed, and it hid.

Nathan was happy for the snake. Rattlers, unless they crawled into bed with one, were really no threat. If one was not going to keep the skin and eat the meat, it was murder. He told them, “Well, if you do kill one, bring it to me. I’ll skin it and cook it up for you!”

A little red-headed boy said, “My dad says they taste like chicken!”

His blond companion said, “Your dad says everything tastes like chicken!”

“He does not! Trout don’t taste like chicken!”

Nathan said, “They are kind of chewy, and they have lots of ribs. I like to soak them in salt water and garlic.”

“Ycch! I hate garlic!”

“OK, well, if I cook for you, I’ll leave out the garlic! But they taste kind of like lizards.”

“But what do lizards taste like?” another kid asked.

“Kind of like chicken,” Nathan joked. This made the children laugh.

An older woman came over and asked him, “These kids buggin’ you?”

“Nope. They are making me laugh. They all seem like good, tough, mountain kids.”

She smiled at the compliment, but she still told the children to leave him alone. They ignored these orders and showed Nathan the pockets full of “jade” they had found. Nathan did not correct them by informing them the green rocks they were calling jade were actually serpentine. Instead, he admired their beautiful finds.

When he walked back to camp, he had an entourage of boisterous children, and when they saw that he was the one with “him-la-yaying”" tent, they grew even more excited. “My dad just about shit a brick when he saw that tent!”

“Don’t say ‘shit!’ That’s a bad word!”

“You just said ‘shit’ too!”

This caused peals of laughter.

They all wanted to see inside it. Nathan, noting their dirty feet, said, “You can look, but don’t go inside.”

They all peered in carefully. Nathan was glad to see that, for he would have felt extremely awkward if he had to try to herd them out. One of the men from the camp came to his rescue. He was another tough looking guy. He growled at the children, “We told you not to just walk into other folks’ camps. You get your asses back!”

Nathan told him, “Can’t blame kids for trying, right?”

“Yeah. My name’s Eli. That redhead is Marky. He’s my boy.” He held out a hand to shake. Nathan took it and introduced himself.

He commented, “This expedition tent musta’ set you back, huh?”

“Nah. I knocked some money off some cabinets I made for this producer guy in Malibu. It was a fucking steal. He never even used it. It’s a pain to set up, and, I suppose, if there’s a hurricane, I’m all set!”

“Yeah,” he grinned, “Cool. Well, anyway, nice to meet you Nathan.”

“Likewise. You up for the weekend?”

“Uh huh. We’re from Dunsmuir. Me and my buddy Don work in the switchyard.”

The switchyard, Nathan knew, was the reason for the town of Dunsmuir’s existence. It was a place where unused railroad cars were detached going up the grade and reattached going down. Sometimes they would add an extra engine in the rear.

“Good old Pushertown,” Nathan said, using a name known only to locals. “I like to go fly fishing through that stretch.”

“Yeah,” Eli agreed. “It’s a great town for kids.”

Nathan nodded. His earliest assessment was wrong. These were rough, working class, railroad people. He told him, “I’m up here with my boy for a week myself. He’s looking at going to college at SOU, so I’m giving him a tour.”

It was not exactly a lie.

Eli told him he was going to try to round up the kids who, contrary to instructions, had all ran off in the wrong direction. “Like herding cats, huh Eli?”

“Ain’t that the truth! We like to let ’em blow off steam up here, ya’ know?”

“Yes. They are not bothering me, so don’t worry on my account, man.”

“Cool.”

They shook hands again.

As Eli walked off, he glanced at Nathan’s truck, raised his eyebrows, and gave him a thumb’s up. Nathan return the compliment by giving him a jaunty salute. It was a signal any railroader would understand.

Adrian was still nowhere to be seen. Nathan got busy with setting up the cooking area on the tailgate for him, setting up the stove, and pulling out the pots and pans he would likely need. He ran his electrical cord from the outlet at the truck and hooked up the lamp above the stove as well as the power to the tent.

It would soon be dark. Not wanting to waste the light, he set up the fire so it would only need a match to get going.

When Adrian returned, he tried to apologize, “I know we had plans, but every time I tried to hand the baby back to Frances, he fussed and kept trying to reach for me!”

“It’s fine, Adrian. It’s fine. I had my own gaggle of kids, and honestly, with these mountain kids around? Not a good idea to fool around at Brian’s pool! They are very likely to follow us or see us.”

“Oh, I saw that group! So cute! Did you notice I put the hot water bag in our sleeping bags? It was fuck hot! We’ll have a shower when it’s dark, huh?”

“Yes, good idea. Anyway, I got the cooking area set up for you.”

“Oh, good! Frances let me give the baby a bottle. He, like, just stared at me, like he was looking into my soul! He kept trying to grab my glasses too.”

Nathan smiled. His Adrian was a natural born dad. Some gay men were.

He suggested, “How about I crack open that bottle of chardonnay?”

“Good idea.”

They each had a glass before dinner while Adrian cooked and Nathan sat by the fire. They had another with his excellent dinner. When the clean up was done, and they had each had their post meal ablutions, they showered, but not together. The camp simply had too many people. A little nudity would offend no one, but Nathan, as he said, did not want to “burn karma” by flouting social conventions.

Wrapped in towels around their waists, they let the dying fire dry them completely, and then in the tent, they did indeed flout social conventions.

Nathan sat in the low camp chair leaning back with his hands on Adrian’s shoulders with his thick cock deep in Adrian’s tight ass as the boy straddled him. “Ooooh,” Adrian cooed, “This feels soooo good, Nathan!”

He lifted himself up only an inch or two and sat back down on Nathan’s fat pole. The pointed tip of his own long one pressed between Nathan’s chest muscles, almost reaching the pit of his neck. His lover was a big-cocked boy! Adrian wiggled his hips and leaned forward to kiss Nathan with his arms around the man’s shoulders.

Nathan ran his hands up and down Adrian’s back. Lowering them, he cupped his pretty lover’s powerful butt. Lifting him up slowly, he held him there to dip his head and give Adrian’s cock a loving suck, causing another powerful surge to harden it fully again. That technique could only work when both guys had big dicks or one had a bendy back. When the gorgeous blond was rigidly hard again, he let him slide down slowly again. He guided him back and leaned forward to lick, kiss, and suck Adrian’s small but perky nipples. This made Adrian sigh and moan again.

Adrian kept his voice to a murmur. “You were right, Nathan. This is a perfect way for us to fuck. It does not hurt at all! It feels great. It’s so soothing!”

Nathan’s experience had shown him that any two men would tend to settle into certain routines in their lovemaking. Not all guys truly sought to please their partner. Some were selfish. Many had certain techniques they used robotically, never really learning anything or trying anything different past a certain stage. Such men might either fall into a sad slump, or they would constantly seek new guys to achieve excitement. He had been with many guys for whom sex was a desperate obsession that never filled the void.

It was the same in the hetero world. Nathan knew many fellows whose wives did not seem to care for sex at all. In fact, in his younger years, such men had been a specialty of his.

If, however, individuals of whatever sexuality sought ways to please their partners, they could, indeed, keep finding new kicks.

With Brian, it had been bringing home excited newbies to share with him in fabulous three-ways. With Adrian? Time would tell.

Mixing it up though such men would, there were always certain things they would discover about each other, and they would always tend to use those moves together.

He and Adrian had found a “thing.” Adrian on top, him on the bottom, Nathan deep inside with Adrian controlling the pace.

Adrian wanted to fuck slowly, like cool honey dripping from a jar. It was a beautiful way to make love. They were two guys who needed affectionate sex and wanted to make it last and last for each other.

With Adrian, still a beginner, despite his amazing adeptness, it was also a practical way to fuck him thoroughly without tearing up his still almost virgin ring.

“Oh!” Adrian moaned, “I feel really fucked! I never knew having a big dick in me could feel so good! I love this feeling of being fucked! Fuck me. Fuck me, Nathan!”

Adrian’s boyishness, was, Nathan had to admit, a fantastic turn on. But it was not merely his beauty, it was his joy and wonder at the newness of everything.

He told Nathan, “I’m gonna try the thing you showed me.”

The “thing” Nathan had shown him was how to grip the head of a cock with his anus and alternately squeeze and relax without going up and down on. He had made Adrian giggle, “It’s like a hand job with your ass!”

Adrian slid up, and Nathan stroked his cock while Adrian practiced the technique. “I’m giving you a ring job, Nathan!”

Nathan laughed at the description. “You have re-coined the term, Adrian!”

Many men, indeed, most men, tended not to talk during sex. Nathan was not that way, and neither, apparently, was Adrian. It was yet another thing they shared. Nathan liked sexy talk during lovemaking. Sex was not a solemn thing for him.

Neither did Nathan like “screamers.” It was like fucking a cartoon character.

Adrian was not a screamer. But he did make cute noises.

“Ohhh. Ohhhhhh. Yeaaaah! Ah! Oooh!”

Yet all very quiet. He made none of the high pitched and girly noises like that ridiculous porn made in Japan. No, Adrian was a man, a young man, but he was a man, and he sounded like a man.

Satisfied with his “ring job,” Adrian slid down again onto Nathan’s lap to lay lavish kisses upon him. Always the kissing. Never without kissing. He rocked his hips, holding him deep.

Then too, Adrian was a scholarly lover. He had studied sex. He had researched it. He had read up on the subject. He had watched porn with an eye to trying the things he saw. He wanted to be a good lover, so he researched how to do that.

Nathan had never met another guy like him. His Adrian was unique. A superstar. The prize. A beautiful genius.

When they had been laying together on the soft down of their sleeping array in the quiet light of Nathan’s subtle lamp at the beginning of their night of lovemaking, Adrian had announced, “I want you to come in my ass, Nathan.”

“It’s better to pull out, Adrian. Safer.”

“No. That’s a myth. I researched it. You can come in the condom. You just have to hold it when you pull out, and you should not linger. Besides, didn’t you say you have not been with a guy since you were last tested?”

“Yes. Still…”

“Nathan? Tonight? Come in my ass.”

It was a special thrill for Nathan that Adrian could take command. Adrian wanted to play “power bottom.” Nathan let himself be led. He trusted Adrian. If Adrian said that pulling out was a myth, then it was a myth.

Nathan held Adrian strongly then. He was feeling an orgasm coming. They had been fucking that way for an hour.

“I feel it, Nathan. You are ready to blow.”

“Yes,” Nathan whispered.

“DO IT!”

Adrian’s face grew feral! He hopped up and down on Nathan’s cock madly! His long cock bounced up and down as he did it. He was loving getting him off.

Yet Nathan needed a change of position. He felt restrained. He wanted to do the fucking!

Using his considerable strength, he lifted himself from the low chair with Adrian on him, and he tossed the boy to the side, onto the soft sleeping bags. He moved with him, trying to stay inside of him, but he popped out nevertheless. He landed on top of him. He lifted Adrian’s legs and held them in the crooks of his arms and stuck it in again.

He fucked Adrian as hard and fast as he could – which was hard and fast indeed. His hips and the tops of his thighs made slapping sounds as he long-cocked his fresh lover until he felt the explosion start. He then he fell on top of Adrian and rammed him hard again as a fantastic orgasm rushed through his entire body from his head to his toes.

Feeling faint, shuddering, he kissed him while giving Adrian a few more deep thrusts before he reached down to hold the condom as he pulled out.

Adrian sighed as he lay there with spread legs and a red, raw, hole. “Now that was fucking!”

Nathan chuckled as he slipped down to suck him off. It did not take long.

After they cleaned up and washed their mouths, Adrian suggested they go out for a walk in the moonlight.

“Yes?”

“It’s a full moon, Nathan. A full moon always makes me restless.”

“Now that you mention it, Adrian, I am not sleepy either. I am almost in the mood for a coffee!”

“You could do it, Nathan. It’s a vacation! You do not have to get up early. You should break the rules.”

“I know somewhere we can walk, Adrian. OK! Let’s do it. I’ll make a coffee.”

“OK! And I’ll drink one of those gourmet root beers we got at Trader Joe’s!”

Nathan loved the way Adrian could take such simple pleasures and make them magical.

“I love you, Adrian.”

“And so you should! I’m very special, you know.”

Nathan laughed, “I do know that, pretty boy.”

“Handsome man!”

Nathan took Adrian up onto the road to walk down to another small swimming hole he liked. It was less than a mile. The road at that stretch was perfectly aligned with the rising moon. It was so bright, it made Nathan squint.

“I am so loving my glasses Nathan! I felt cut off from the world without them! Look at the moon! I can see all the lights and darks and craters again. It is like daytime, it is so bright!”

They were wearing shorts, t-shirts, and sandals. Nathan took his coffee to sip slowly.

They held hands as they walked. One of Adrian’s most endearing features was the way he was not bothered by Nathan’s missing fingers. His warm hand felt so good in his. Adrian would even occasionally rub the stumps with his fingers. Every amputee that Nathan had ever known liked to do that to themselves. People who would do that for them were rare.

Unlike the night before, this night was warm. There was a whisper of a warm breeze rising from the lower elevations rather than the cold current flowing down from the high country. Nathan commented about that.

Adrian observed, “It is the world breathing.”

“Lovely, Adrian!” Adrian usually spoke with a casual, West Coast slang, but Nathan considered all the times Adrian mentioned books he had read, his hints that he was good at English but not so adept at math, and all the clever little turns of phrase he could come up with. Yes, his Adrian had a way with words when he put his mind to it.

My Adrian.

He thought of him that way.

As he often did, Adrian changed the subject in a startling way. “I like having a rich boyfriend, Nathan.”

Nathan laughed happily. The way he could just pop up with things! “The wheels in your mind are constantly spinning, aren’t they, Adrian?”

“Constantly. But seriously, it’s great! I like that you can just say, ‘Fuck this! You need glasses! Let’s get some! Right now!’ And you are not vain about it at all. You don’t even care!”

“Oh, I care all right! I like money too. ‘I’ve been rich, and I’ve been poor; believe me, rich is better!’”

“Ha. I’ve heard that before. Who said that? Do you know?”

“Well, talk about looking things up? I looked that up. I lot of people said it. Apparently it already was a joke before the first time it saw print. So it’s folk wisdom. It’s a truism though. I must say that money is not always better. It can be a trap. But it is almost always faster. Still, I feel pretty encumbered by all my ownership. I feel heavy and less free than I did in my youth.”

“Yeah. I can see that, but I do like having a rich boyfriend.”

They went around a bend then and were in shadow once again. Adrian said, “You remember I told you my dad could help you with your ESOP?”

“Yeah, but you know? I thought you said your dad is a financial analyst.”

“I never said that. You concluded that, and then we talked about something else. No, my dad started as a stock broker, then a fund manager, and then in Oh-Eight crash, he got his ass kicked, so he returned to what his first love was, what he calls ‘nuts and bolts.’ He helps people set up trusts. It is complicated and expensive. He’s written about ESOPs. He’s had several articles published, in fact. He’s into those. He says that companies like that tend to be able to weather economic storms because they have such employee loyalty. The employees themselves will even vote to cut their own pay to get through hard times. They tend not to be management heavy, and generally, better places to work with higher morale and less infighting.”

“I love it. That’s exactly what I want. I want to sell my company to my employees.”

“It sounds like you are the perfect candidate for an ESOP, Nathan. You should meet my dad.”

“Well, that can happen, but I’m pretty leery of meeting a homophobe who is fucking his son. Honestly, Adrian.”

Adrian drew close to him when he quietly said, “We will have to handle that, Nathan.”

“I’m scared, Adrian.”

“So you are afraid of something!”

“Yes. I even lied today. I told one of the guys at the other camp I was up here with my ‘boy.’”

“That was not exactly a lie.”

“Yes it was.”

“Except, I am your boy. And you are my old man. We can say it that way. Fuck them, Nathan! Besides, like you say, ‘Why push our luck?’”

He sounded so fierce when he said it.

Every gay man knew the feeling – the hidden anger, the resentment of being unacceptable to some others, possibly many others. The danger!

They walked in silence in the night, passing in and out of moonlight. Two gay men, one old, one young, madly in love, holding hands, dreaming of a better world where they could walk in the sunshine.

The small pool Nathan had in mind was below a large turnout on the road. Nathan was hoping that no one had pulled over there to sleep. It was one of the places where people would commonly do that.

To his disappointment, there was a small camping van parked there.

“Shit,” Adrian complained.

“Let’s not be stopped, Adrian. The river belongs to everyone. They have their light on. That means they can’t see us. Like you said, ‘Fuck them!’”

The access required one to get down a steep and tricky path of twenty feet. Normally, it would be difficult in the dark, but the brightness of the moon on that clear night made it possible without flashlights.

They kept far away from the van. They were quiet as they negotiated the steep, narrow path. Once at the water, they looked up. One could only see the top of the van and a small sliver of light from the side window.

That particular hole was longer, wider, and deeper than their favorite one. The stream was wider at the top and tumbled gently over small stones. The noise of the stream easily covered their soft voices.

They undressed behind a large boulder out of view of the road, and slipped into the water with sighs. They caressed each other and kissed before using their hands to scrub each other off. Adrian, ever the libidinous boy, became thoroughly aroused again. Nathan, though he was stimulated, did not get a full erection, so Adrian gave his cock and balls some attention while he kissed him until he was satisfied.

“There. Now we are even!”

Nathan smiled and tossed his head. He wanted to swim. The pool was long enough to actually get in some strokes rather than simply splash around. He considered taking Adrian to some of the other holes he knew on the river where one could really swim.

Adrian, seeing what he was doing, copied him. After that, they rested in the moonlight on the far shore. The rocks were still warm on their bare bottoms from the day’s sunlight. A flash of light above caught their attention. Looking up, they saw a man walk over to the edge of the road and piss on the rocks. They said nothing and did not move. He went back to his van.

“That was funny, Nathan!”

“Yes. Hey Adrian? There are a couple of really big swimming holes. I pointed out one on the way up, but just downstream is that other campground I told you about that’s a nudie hole and a hippy hangout. They won’t mind a couple of gay guys. We could go there and be totally open. We could even kiss.”

“Hmmm… Maybe!”

Adrian did not, Nathan noticed, give him his diffident shrug, but he did not exactly agree. Nathan said, “We don’t have to kiss. We could just play it cool.”

“OK. Well, I’m riding my bike tomorrow, and you are working on your arbor plans. Maybe in the afternoon when it’s really hot?”

“Yep.”

“I’m getting hungry again.”

“Me too. Let’s go whip something up.”

After eating yet again, they did, indeed, whip a couple things up.