Date: Thu, 2 Feb 2012 21:01:35 -0700
From: dnrock@rock.com
Subject: Red 8

Red
by:  dnrock(dnrock@rock.com)


8:  If There Be Bounds, I Have Not Found Them.

From Chapter 7: "....I like to add at this point, I was once a barefoot boy
and I still am."  Dad opened his arms and Russ moved across the sofa to be
embraced and receive a kiss or two on the forehead, pressing his slim body
against dad's chest.  Kos had a momentary flash of jealousy.  It was
intense but fleeting, as he remembered dad and himself.  It was not sharing
dad, it was sharing Russ he had to adjust too.

Russ would have liked to receive a kiss or two on the lips but dad was not
about to do this.  His love and affection could not have a sexual context.
It mattered not what was in Leslie Smith's heart.  He had never shared or
even allowed any sexual interest in his biological children, this new son
would not be treated differently in kind; degree of course, was need
dependent and Les would deliver all that was needed and desired, short of
sex.


Ms Stemple had covered Whittier and several other American poets as part of
the grade 5 English Literature studies.  Russ had been given the task of
reciting the poem, all 103 lines to his class.  All the students had to
recite something.  Russ, in fact, chose this poem and being Russ had been
highly animated in its delivery.  Sheila was filled with pride by Russ'
performance, he was her "Barefoot Boy" and she just knew, as he stood
before the class, he was saying it just for her, just to her.

It was Ed who found the little statue for her.  (The little figure is a
miniature copy of a life size bronze, that sits on a rock by a little pond,
in a small park in Whittier, California.  A town named for the great poet,
the park and statue honours the poet and the spirit of his poem.)

Russ was delighted with this and all his presents.  He had never received
so many gifts before in his life.  He had never received so many gifts that
imported such emotional and transcendental meaning before, either.  Kos'
picture of the family, was another.

Mom was bowled over by the charm bracelet.  Smothering Russ with hugs and
kisses.  She could not figure out how he afforded it and no one was about
to tell her.  Oh, she knew Les had given him extra money, something he
always had done for Kos and Nancy, when they were children.  She had always
thought it extravagant but it was just Les' nature, learned to just ignore
that and a few of his other annoyances.  A wise and successful way to make
a relationship work.  She figured Nancy had something to do with the idea
but didn't expect anyone to admit that either.

It was about then when the doorbell rang.  Russ bolted for it.  He flung it
open expecting Eric but was surprised by Sheila, who planted several
passionate kisses on his lips, before he even knew what was happening.  The
pendent was obviously a bigger hit with her than Russ had imagined.  This
in front of both her grandfather and the Smith household.  Russ immediately
blushed bright red but in no way pulled back.  He was a full participant
after the initial instant shock.  Mom and Nancy thought it was so cute, if
a little unexpected.  They obviously were unaware of Russ' advanced state
of puberty, i.e. his early start.  That makes some sense since, his voice
had not changed yet, and did not show any signs of any body hair.  In Russ'
case the emotional or neural changes that accompany maturity were running
wall ahead of his physical manifestations, with the exception of his growth
and genital development.

Eleven year old girls are usually ahead of boys at the same age anyway and
Sheila too was moving a bit earlier and faster than other girls her age.
Due to Russ' early start they were, in fact, close to the same level of
development.

Everyone of course wanted to inspect the pendent and comment on the quality
of Nadine's work, which took a few minutes.  While Ed accepted a glass of
seasonal cheer, Russ took his little statue and Sheila to the TV room, for
a slightly more private thank you.  Kos was very pleasantly surprised, not
at Nadine's work, but at Russ' taste and creativity.  Something he credited
himself with fostering, something he quietly took pride in.  Well he was
the creative artist in the family, wasn't he.

Ed spent several minutes admiring Kos' family gifts.  They are of course
works of art, displayed around the room on easels.  For his parents the
portrait of himself, Russ, Simon and Nancy.  For Nancy and Simon a hospital
scene, composed of a red haired boy, in a bed being tended to by Dr. Simon
and Nurse Nancy.  It was clearly a recreation of Russ' first day after Eric
brought him to the hospital, complete with a sketch hung over the bed.  For
Eric and Jessica, a portrait of Sandy and Russ, Sandy standing next to Russ
sitting with his arm over her back.  It is obvious, Russ is his favourite
subject.  The highlight was a picture of him and Russ.  Just from the waist
up, bare chested, their bodies facing away but turned half way toward each
other, they are holding hands but that is only implied not seen; Russ
looking up and Kos looking down, each into the other eyes.  That is the one
Ed liked the most, he could feel the emotion leaping from the canvas to the
viewer.  He knew or at least interpreted what he was seeing, as Kos'
expression of lover for his adoptive brother.  He hears hundreds of cases a
year; Russ' adoption was one of those routine things that brought an extra
measure of satisfaction to him.  Ed's role was minor in the grand schema of
things but satisfying never the less.

Ed had always hoped his daughter would produce a grandson.  That was not to
be.  He loved his granddaughters with all the love a grandparent can,
totally and unconditionally, a grandson would be nice too.  Since his
beloved wife died he had mellowed a bit, allowing his grand-fatherly
sensibilities to perk a deeper interest, in anything having to do with
children.

He did have to agree with Sheila, Russ was the most beautiful boy in the
city, well the most beautiful red haired boy at the least.  He had been
attracted to the lad from the first time he read about him.  Why, he had no
idea.  In the court room that day, when he first met him, it was as if the
grandson he longed for had materialized.  Perhaps he could be a surrogate
grandparent for him.

Just before Ed collected Sheila to go, Russ came flying down the stairs and
into the TV room with his guitar in hand.  Somewhere he had found the
lyrics and music for the 1962 Tommy Roe song, Sheila.  It was recorded and
performed by Roe, a Buddy Holly sound alike song, which Russ managed to
play on his acoustic instrument.  "Sweet little Sheila...Sheila whispered
in my ear.....Sheila said she loved me..."  It was possible for Russ to
easily hit those higher alto notes but of course the classic Holly sound
and driving rhythm was mostly missing.

Sheila didn't care, it was a song that used her name and was being sung to
her, for her, by her boy and that was all that counted.  To her, he was the
best boy singer in the world.  To her, this was a gift of exceptional
importance.  As he played and sang, Sheila's right hand fondled the initial
pendent, her eyes speaking intense, if only partly understood, emotions.

Except for Les, none of them ever remembered hearing this.  Les knew it
from his high school and college playing days (mid 70's) but even then it
was obscure, i.e. mostly forgotten, having been Roe's first #1 hit.  Ed had
probably danced to it in his youth, `62 would have been grade 11 for him,
but he had not heard it in more years than even he cared to remember.  None
of that mattered, did it?

[Note: Your author remembered this song from his youth too but had
difficulty finding references to it by searching the title.  Now you also
know something else about the author. http://www.allbutforgottenoldies.net/
had a short clip from one of Roe's albums.  Looking up Tommy Roe proved
better, as Roe wrote the song as well as performed it.  Google Tommy Roe
for more details.]

Our boy did more than just sing the song, which he had gotten the lyrics
for, on the net.  He even modified several of the phrases. (the original
follows in (brackets)) The cords and tabs, however were more difficult to
locate, the best he could do was Holly's Maybe Baby but that worked.  Les
was very proud of him.

[Now reader your author begs your indulgence.  Please briefly close your
eyes and remember what Tommy or Buddy would sound like.  Can you hear it?
Sure you can.  Those usual cords and pounding rhythm.  Okay, now that you
have that in your mental ear.  Substitute, an in tune Alto boy voice and
his acoustic cords, sing along with our protagonist as he serenades his
first girl love; all of course with that Hollyesk phrasing.]

Sweet little Sheila, you'll know her if you see her
Blue eyes and a ponytail
Her cheeks are rosy, hair is flaming red(she looks a little nosey)
Man, this little girl is fine

Never knew a girl like-a little Sheila
Her name drives me insane
Sweet little girl, that's my little Sheila
Man, this little girl is fine

Me and Sheila go for a ride
Oh-oh-oh-oh, I feel all funny inside
Then little Sheila whispers in my ear
Oh-oh-oh-oh, I love you Sheila dear

Sheila said she loved me, she said she'd never leave me
True love will never die
We're so doggone happy being close together (just sein' around together)
Man, this little girl is fine

Never knew a girl like-a little Sheila
Her name drives me insane
Sweet little girl, that's my little Sheila
Man, this little girl is fine

Me and Sheila go for a ride
Oh-oh-oh-oh, I feel all funny inside
Then little Sheila whispers in my ear
Oh-oh-oh-oh, I love you Sheila dear

Sheila said she loved me, she said she'd never leave me
True love will never die
We're so doggone happy being close together (just sein' around together)
True love will never die (this line added)
Man, this little girl is fine
Oh, this little girl is fine
Yeah, this little girl is fine
Oh, this little girl is fine
True love will never die (this line added)]

That song was good for at least three more kisses.  Yes, this is her
barefoot boy, free of spirit, filled with unabashed boy self confidence.
No one realized Russ had modified the words somewhat but that was okay, he
knew, that is all that counted.

Mom and dad stood to one side, her head pressed against his massive
shoulders their arms around each other.  Letting their communal empathy
flood their conches minds, as Russell and Sheila prepared to part.  Ed had
attempted to apologize for disrupting such an important time as Christmas
Day, no one would hear of that.

This time, when Russ rushed to the door bell, it was Eric, Jessica and
Sandy.  Their arms were loaded with presents: bottles of wine, boxes of
candy and several Xbox cartage for Russ.

.............................

I just couldn't believe what was happening to me.  It was good, I think
anyway.  Sheila and I really connected like never before.  I could just
tell when I sang the song.  I could see it in her eyes and felt it in her
kiss too.  All I know is, thank god for these, kind of baggy, pants.  I
thought Kos and Eric could get me hard quick but her kiss and touch was
something else.  Like electric shocks going through my body.  I feel bad
for her because I have Kos and sometimes Eric but she has no one to help
her.

I think I will do up a version of Stand By Me, for her.  The other day her
mom rented a movie called Stand By Me.  The movie was about four boys
having an adventure in a small town.  The theme song had the same name and
it was sung by Ben E. King, I think in 1962 but it was real good and I
think easy to play.  I got the lyrics and cords on the net, like I did for
Sheila, I can quickly learn to play them.  I kind of like the other oldies
that were in the movie sound track too.  They are mostly fun and easy for a
novice player like me.  "Everyday it is getting closer, going faster like a
roller costar".  Anyway, I sure have fun with this old stuff.  I kind of
like the folk songs too.  Many of them are lots of fun to sing.  I found
lots of these old songs in dad's tape and CD collection.  I can do that.
When I sing Stand By Me to Sheila, I think I will substitute red haired
girl for darlin'.  I sure wish I had a Tenor voice like Kos or a Baritone
voice like Eric and dad...

I wonder if Amos would like to sing and play with me.  I know he sings but
I wonder if he plays anything, other then his boyhood.  I wonder why so
many modern singers sound like they are whispering into a tin can?  I guess
one could do rap, frankly I think I have more fun in melody.  I know, I'll
prepare Stand By Me for Sheila by Valentine's Day.  I'm just glad I have
Kos, it would be hell to be hard all the time, with only my hand for
relief.  I am just the luckiest boy in the world, two men to love me, good
friends, a girl friend, a family that thinks anything I do is next to
wonderful, people like the Judge and uncle Fred that watch over me.

Now neither of his parents, nor any of his family, think luck has anything
to do with anything.  Mom may be a professor the classical studies, ancient
history and languages, that does not mean she accepts all their
philosophical or religious ideas at face value.  Freda would be the first
to tell you that the old Greek idea, shared with other cultures by the way,
of the Faits, was hogwash.  Chance yes, coincidence yes, by human plan or
design of course.  Divine or demi-divine, no way.  Predestination for her
was more myth than the myths themselves.  ....................

On the 26th, which was a Monday this year, Freda and Nancy rounded up
Jessica, but not Nadine, who was still at her parents home, for an all day
post Christmas shopping trip.  Simon was on duty at the hospital, so just
Kos, Eric and Dad were available to give Russ his special gifts.  It was
like his special birthday party but this time dad was here.  Russ did not
expect anything sexual to be in the packages or to go on as long, since dad
was in the house.

Fait may be a myth but surprises are not.  Kos and Russ joined Eric and Les
in the basement recreation room.  Russ came bounding down the stairs, his
usual two at time, brought up real short at the bottom.  Standing next to
the table, piled with presents, were Dad and Eric.  What surprised Russ was
not who but what they were doing.  Eric was kissing his dad in the most
passionate possible way.  He was also sure their hands were busy in each
other's crotch.

Kos placed his hand on Russ shoulder.  "It is not polite to stare and no
dad won't have sex with us, only Eric.  It is because we are his children
and Eric is not."

Eric bent over and began kissing Russ and moved on to Kos.  After Russ
settled down a bit, well about as much as he could, with both Eric and Kos
fondling his crotch and butt, that is; Russ attacked the pile of presents.
There were some new sex toys, bottles of lube, coloured condoms and some
hygiene/cleaning products.  In the last box Russ found 8 pair of the
sexiest briefs he could imagine, different styles all in a shinny gold.
They were like the ones that Amos and the other boys had.

I was blown away by the undies.  They were shinny gold and felt so soft and
slippery.  On the waist band in front was my name in black letters,
Russell.  I looked them over on the inside was stitched: "hand made for
Russell Smith by Boy Fashions of Cleveland."

"I have something for each of you," Les announced and he reached in his
pocket, drawing out four gold necklaces.  "These necklaces symbolize the
love of a boy, by that boy's man and that boy for his man.  You will notice
the links are square and interlocked.  This design was found in the runes
of an ancient gymnasium near Athens."  My mind was racing to remember all
the stuff I had read in mom's books.  Dad handed one to Kos and laid two on
the table.

"Kos, we men should honour our boys by placing this symbol of fidelity on
them."  Kos smiled and placed the necklace around my neck.  I could see dad
doing the same thing to Eric.  I guess that tells me a lot about why dad
was so tolerant.  Kos kissed me and pressed my body tight to himself.  Dad
and Eric did the same and dad handed a neckless to me and Eric.

"This symbolized the fidelity of a boy to his man," Eric said.  Kos was
good enough to bend over a bit so I could place it around his neck and of
course give him one long, tongue probing kiss.

Now I knew why dad wouldn't have any sex with me, he had plagued himself to
Eric.  I remember that in the ancient gymnasiums, the man--boy love pair
carried a great deal of responsibility, obligations and expectations.
Fidelity being one of them.  What may have started as lust, became love, in
a majority of cases, as mom's books said.

I was just blown away when Kos placed the neckless on my neck.  I was so
proud.  At first I thought it was a sign of ownership.  When I placed his
on he was my man, my lover; just like I belonged to him.  Dad and Eric were
a bit emotional too.  Dad made sure to correct my misconception.  Not a
sign on ownership but membership, of emotional belonging, he said.  He also
told Eric that if he ever found a boy to love, other than me, his necklace
should be passed down to that boy.  Eric protested but dad was firm, that
is the way it had to be.

I got Kos to undress me so I could try on and model my new undies.  I know
they all wanted to see and Kos would not deny his boy's request, he didn't.
Kos stood me on a low table and I felt great standing on this pedestal
naked, except for my gold necklace.  They were all admiring my great body.
Kos kept passing his hand over my butt and every time he did I got a
stronger erection.  Eric chose the boxer briefs so Kos slipped them up.  I
placed my hands on his shoulders to steady myself.  They fit perfectly.  I
mean perfectly.  The waist band came right at the point on my back where
the butt joined the lower back.  and right at the top the hip and across
the front.  The little legs, the inseam, was just perfect and the back seem
snugged into my butt crack perfectly, defining each butt cheek.  In the
front was a pouch that held my balls up and allowed my boner to stick
straight out.

The material is gold of course and very soft but it looks wet or like
leather and it stretches.  They fit just like a second skin.  Dad and Eric
joined in touching me and letting their hands slide over the material.  I
sure liked that, let tell you, it was oh so neat.  The others fit just as
well and I sure couldn't tell which one was best.  They were all super and
they all said so too.  By the time this was done I was horny as hell and so
was Kos.  Dad and Eric were not far behind either.  I was even more
convinced now that I was as good or better looking naked or in undies as
any of the boys or young men I see on the internet.

My favourite, is a boy that has been around for a while, I am told.  Well
his pictures have been.  His name is Taddy, Russian I believe.  In some of
the pictures he looks my age in others older.  He has blond hair and
blue-gray eyes and not as many freckles as I do.  He looks tall for his age
like me with wide shoulders, narrow middle and a small round butt.  My
penis is bigger than his.  Anyway he is about as cute or handsome as any
boy model out there and when he half smiles his lips are just so inviting,
like Sheila's, I just want to kiss them.  Kos likes him too but he is often
very critical of his photographer.  I guess he worked for more than one,
some better than others.  Kos told me he figured Taddy must be a young man
by now.  I wonder what he looks like today?

I can't quite remember how it happened but in short order I was laying on
the table with my butt handing just over the edge and my legs on Kos'
shoulders.  We were all naked.  Kos pushed his cock into my anus and slowly
began filling me up.  Just as he hit bottom and his balls pressed into my
butt Eric stepped up behind him and began pressing his penis into his ass.
We had shared this position before but always on the bed.  I was almost
shocked to see dad move in behind Eric and soon we were four.  That is when
the real fun began it was like a freight train pulling or letting out its
slack, bump, bump, bump...pull, pull. pull and repeat.  Man was this
something.

We all went around naked for the next few hours.  Kos and I in my room and
Eric and dad in Kos'.  God I love my man.  We took showers together and got
dressed just in time to greet mom and Nancy in the kitchen.  Dad had taken
his necklace off and I assume gave it to Eric.

Mom of course noticed we three boys had something new.  She immediately
recognized the design.  Commenting on its origin and general cultural
meaning.  Les just tossed off he saw them when in Athens and couldn't
resist getting them for his sons.  Mom was a good sport, she just rolled
her eyes.  Given her education, I figured she must know what this was all
about or had at least some idea about it.  She never said anything, so I
guess she understands or just didn't want to know.

A few days later Les had a long talk with Russ about meaning of the
necklaces.  He wanted Russ to understand what he understood the
significance to be and why he felt it necessary to present them to his
sons.  Russ never questioned his reference to Eric as his son.  He
understood this was not biology or legality talking, it was his heart.  No
one ever said that Eric was Les' boy, when he was a boy.  Russ just
understood that was the case and by implication that is what would happen
to him and Kos' relationship, as they matured and became independent
persons.  Russ knew that was the old Greek Way.  He also knew that in
Minoan times many young men bonded for life.  On an island with limited
resources and land, not every citizen could have a family.  Several of the
authors Russ had read said just that.  They also talked about the Ganymede
myth and traced its origins to Crete, noting the bonding procedure involved
a special cup and so on.

Some authors suggested that many man-boy relationships undoubtedly carried
on, that bisexual relationship were also well known, if not extensively
talked or written about.  All this Russ remembered.  Les wanted to make
sure that Russ understood why his relationship to his sons had to be non
sexual and that his love for them was undiminished.  Russ thought he
understood and he puzzled over it for several days until he realized that
Les could not treat him any differently than he had Kos or Nancy.  It is a
dangerous game for a parent to treat his or her children unevenly, in their
role of parent and child.  That parents could get along better with one
child or another, they could be friends with some and not others but that
was outside the parent--child relationship.  Les also reminded him that
like biological parents, he had no choice in the selection, same for
siblings but he, as is Kos, is free to choose his lover or lovers.

On the run up to New Years Day, Kos was giving his commission all of his
attention.  Russ didn't like it but he understood.  Dad and Mom seemed to
understand too.  Kos was left more or less alone to concentrate on his work
and Russ was entertained as best they were able.  Russ, by this time had
friends in the neighbourhood to hang with and he had Sheila.  That, in
addition to his singing and music practice.  He went as often as possible
with Les to the office.  Russ just seemed be attracted to those computer
modelling programs Les and his staff used.

It was during this week that he made three real discoveries.  One was easy.
One of the engineers, a nice looking, if slightly built man, named Arnold
made a couple of passes at him.  The first one he only realized in
retrospect, the second he got right away.  He liked the fellow a lot, but
when the man started to play with his knee and upper leg, moving is hand
toward Russ' crotch he almost panicked.  Sure this was stimulating and sure
he wanted to enjoy its' promise, but he was Kos' boy.  He was spoken for.

Russ gently placed his hand on his and moved it to the table.  He smiled
and continued to ask questions about the computer program he was being
shown.  Then Russ got an idea and leaned back and began folding his new
necklace.  Arnold's attention was immediately drawn to the action, asking
about it.

"It's a symbol of fidelity," Russ commented, "It tells everyone this boy's
heart is spoken for."

The engineer began to apologize, he was embarrassed.  Russ put his small
hand on his companion's hand.

"How could you know unless it's twin was also present.  Its all right and I
am truly flattered.  You took a big risk," Russ smiled and extended his
hand, "friends."

"Friends," he said responding with a hand shake.

For a very young man, a child really, our Russ displayed more poise and
social/political savvy than most adults would have.  Not all the lessons
learned in abusive situations are negative.  Being able to read peoples
intentions and diffuse potentially awkward situations, is one of them.  He
realized he was that "beautiful boy" and not just to Sheila; and as long as
he had that beauty he would encounter many admirers.  He also realized
something about dad's gift that was never explained.  This was not just a
symbol to others, it was a reminder and aid to self.  Russ was also, all to
aware, that child/adult sexual relationships are often a function of the
power differential.

This is not unlike physical abuse situations.  In his experience, the two
were never linked, he knew from reading and talking to others they sure can
be.  What he didn't quite realize or think about anyway, was that in this
situation he was the one with the power.  That is probably a good thing,
since in other situations he would not be, telling which is which may prove
problematic; until he gains sufficient physical and emotional strength to
properly control that power.  Fortunately, Arnold did recognize it.

Russ discovered he could keep his cool and use his quick thinking, to
defuse what could have been a difficult or awkward situation for both of
them.  He also discovered, just how desirable and attractive he was to
others.  Knowing it and experiencing that knowledge, are not quire the same
thing.  Arnold risked his job making a pass at the boss' youngest son.
Arnold is not experienced, in these things.  Russ is the first and probably
the last, under the age of consent person, he will make a pass at.
Something Russ did not know and could not have known.

He also discovered a talent for mathematics.  Even though he had not yet
learned anything much about algebra, geometry or other advanced math,
(Remember he is only in grade 5) he just seemed to understand what these
engineers were talking about and how the models worked.  He did not always
understand the physics or the why.  He would ask dad when they got home.

I sure liked the math part of all this; once they explained kind of how it
worked, it was fun too.  It's very funny, I didn't even need to study it,
not really.  All anyone did was show me the equations and I had it more or
less.  I think I will read some of dad's books, this stuff looks like lots
of fun to me.

I sure hope Arnold was not too put off by my refusal to play games, well
sexy games, anyway.  I figure not.  It seemed to me he just got a bit
carried away.  Anyway, now I know I can say no to an adult without getting
into any kind of trouble.

Before the parents went back to London they made both boys promise to spend
most of the summer with them.  Russ had never been on an airplane before,
so he was looking forward to it.  Kos had never been to Europe either, so
he was looking forward to that.  (But I get ahead of myself, like way ahead
of myself.  I mean that is not even a subtle way of foreshadowing.)

...........................

[Note: You can always skip these notes of course.  This is a much condensed
sample of what Russ had been reading.

Greek pederasty, as idealized by ancient Greeks during Classical times, was
a relationship and bond between an adolescent boy and an adult man outside
of his immediate family, and was constructed as a moral and educational
institution. "Pederasty" derives from the combination of pais (Greek for
'boy') with erastis (Greek for 'lover'; cf. eros).

In a wider sense it referred to erotic love between adolescents and adult
men. The Greeks, regardless of region, considered it normal for a man to be
drawn to the beauty of a boy - just as much if not more than to that of a
woman. What they disagreed upon was whether and how to express that desire.

The rite of passage, Ephoris an ancient writer describes, began when Minoan
boys were segregated into agelae ("herds"), to prepare them for manhood and
to train them as soldiers.  However, when an older young man, called a
philetor ("lover"), saw a youth who attracted him by his beauty, courage,
and manners, he would "capture" his chosen one, called a parastatheis, with
the consent of his parents and help of his friends. Taking him to the local
andreion (male dining club) where he was a member, the suitor would give
the youth presents and then take him into the country (accompanied by some
of the boy's friends), where they spent two months hunting and
feasting. Thereafter, returning to the dining club, the beloved would tell
whether he was happy with how his lover had treated him; and the lover, if
accepted, would present the youth with military garb, an ox, and a drinking
cup, along with other costly gifts. After that, the youth was called
kleinos ("famous"), wore distinctive clothing, and was given special seats
at dances and races and other honors. All the new "famous" youths were then
married in a mass wedding. This same-sex tradition displays all of the
familiar elements of a rite of passage: initiation into a select group,
seclusion for a time during which an older male teaches a younger male
special skills, and then return to society where the initiate receives a
new status and special garments.  The Minoan's were quite advanced in pre
Dorian times compared to mainlanders.  Other writers suggested the lovers
were not always much different in age and mutual friends often suggested or
even selected the lover candidate.  This depended partly on their relative
status and economic positions.

Most ancient Greeks lived openly bisexual and polyamorous lifestyles.
While the Greek mainland men was expected to marry and raise children, he
was also expected to enter into erotic and mentoring relationships with
worthy youths.  Intimate relationships between older adult men and male
youth were not only common, they were considered a social duty to the
state.  Even though male homosexual relations were common, there were
certain guidelines to be adhered to.  Greek homosexuality was largely
intergenerational.  It should be remembered the Greeks had no word or the
modern concept of homosexual.  While bisexuality was common what we would
call homosexual relationships were probably about the same ratio as today.
Relationships between two adult men of similar age were unusual, and open
to ridicule, as were relations with overly young boys.  We should not be
two quick to judge however since all we have is fragmented literature and
satirical drama.  Many well known homosexual couples are also know to have
been well respected and active in city politics.  The Greek idea of
manliness was incompatible with one partner (male of course) taking a
passive role in sex, i.e. being a bottom.  Not unlike today in some
respects.  Some gays are bottoms by preference today and they were then
too.  An assertive citizen was respected and submissive one not so much.
Some things never seem to change from our primate ancestors to today.
Please keep in mind this applied to citizens only.  Slaves and women were
not citizens and had different rules.

The ancient Greeks believed in an age of consent, marked by a young man's
ability to "think for himself".  This age of consent ranged from
adolescence to early adulthood.

These relationships were both erotic and educational. A male youth would be
courted by many men, and then he would choose one to be his lover.  More or
less however in smaller places arrangements were often made by the boy's
father or guardian. The goal of Greek education was the attainment of male
perfection -- both physical and mental perfection.  The adult was not just
lover but mentor, guide, teacher or apprentice's master and friend.  This
education took place in the gymnasium. The gymnasium was the center of
every Greek town, and served a far greater purpose than the modern
format. The gymnasium was an elaborate structure with many rooms, baths,
and hallways decorated with all sorts of art work including statues of gods
and heroes. Philosophers, poets, and other intellectuals would come
together in these places. Boys and men would spend their days in both
intellectual and physical exercises. Youth weren't just valued for their
bodies, but also for their minds -- their ability to reason and debate.  It
was as difficult then as it is today for a child to openly express himself
to his father as that relationship if neither voluntary or without huge
power overtones and obligations.  Sports and even the public olympics were
performed in the nude. In fact, public nudity was not at all uncommon, nor
was public sex.  The body was something to be proud of. It did not elicit
the feelings of shame or modesty that many of us feel in modern society.
Climate has something to do with this as well.

The ancient Greek word for gymnasium meant a place for being naked.  It
wasn't until the 1500's when its definition was changed to a place of
excursive, as it is today.]