Date: Tue, 5 Sep 2017 13:10:23 -0400
From: Next <familyboat@fairpoint.net>
Subject: The Dark   By David

				 The Dark

Forward

He set bolt upright in his bed. It was still dark yet there was a vision
before his eyes. A vague image, darkened and moving away. It seemed to be a
large framed person. The image was blurred but moved like a man. There was
no sway or bounce like a woman's movements. Then it faded and was gone. He
lay back down and stared into the darkness. The sweat was cool on his
face. Sleep once again came.

Over the next few months the image came into his sleep several times. Each
time it was startling and scared the bejesus out of him. There seemed to be
no sense to it. Each time he thought it was a there but then it was gone.
The only common facts were that it happened at night and shocked him awake
and every time he was awaken with an erection. What the hell is that?  This
was getting too strange. And now it started coming into his conscience
awakened world. He would catch glances of movement off to his side and when
he turned it was gone. What the hell? At least there was no erections in
the day visits but a definite arousal was still there. This is just too
crazy. Whatever was going on seemed to have a sexual urge attached to
it. This was no wet dream or even a sexual day dream.

One day while he set in his chair on the back porch, he tried to reason. It
seemed to be a huge man and he was always walking away and what was this
sexual thing all about. The more he thought the more aroused he became. Not
only was he getting hard but his mouth was salivating. He reached into his
pocket and pushed the change aside so he could slide the bottom of his
pocket over to touch his now harder cock. He sat there slowly stroking and
looking around to see if there was anyone in sight. As it stiffened he had
to adjust his cock so that it was upright and could expand against his
stomach. He lay his head back and closed his eyes and stained to see the
image. He could taste the saliva in his mouth as it thickened. His tongue
moved around pushing the thickness up against his lips as the tip of his
tongue separated his lips and moved the moistness across his surface and
back again. The taste was familiar yet foreign. Then the orgasm came as it
rose from deep inside his thighs and his balls tightened and the strokes
became more rapid. As he ejaculated he felt the tingle rush over his body
and he straightened and moved forward. Then it was passed and he then sank
back into his chair and opened his eyes. As he looked down and saw the wet
spot that had appeared on his pants he thought. There is no longer any
doubt that this dream was sexual. This was the first time that he came to
full erection and the first time that the dream caused him to want to seek
sexual satisfaction. There was no doubt now but with confirmation came more
confusion.

Chapter one, An Awakening

The big man dream was a little less prevalent as time passed and now
instead of fear he found pleasure with himself. But then came another dream
but this one was different. It was clearer and these were giants dancing.
His view was though what seemed to be bars on his window. This dream also
kept coming into his sleep but sometimes it would be just as he awakened.
He assumed he was not crazy but just that his mind was trying to reason out
something he had seen once. A movie, no not that, maybe a story in a book
he read while in the Navy. There was always lax time in the Navy while at
sea. There is no TV reception out there and the radio lacked imagination so
he read.  Of course, the only thing that was in the ships meager library
were the paper back trash books that young men would purchase while in
port. They called them Fuck Books. That's because they usually had a meager
story line of some bullshit, but they're saving grace was the fucking
parts. Really the parts about somebody or some bodies screwing. The two
dreams plagued his sleep and now his awakened hours also. At least this new
dream was not leaving him with his hand in his pants feeling his hard on.

One day while at his sister's home, where several of his brothers and some
older relatives had gathered to reminisce about bygone days, a single part
of the conversation caught his attention. His sister had mentioned that the
front door of their child hood home had been damaged when her two oldest
brothers and their mother were pushing their father out through it. Some
people frond while others laughed. His stomach rolled over and a little
vomit rose into his mouth.

Later after everyone but himself and of course his sister had left, while
helping with the cleaning up, he could still taste the acidic flavor of
vomit in the back of his mouth. He started to talk to his sister about her
recollections of that day and the broken door. He asked specifically about
the fight between their brothers and father. She told him of what had
happened and that that was the last day their father ever spent in their
childhood home. Their mother sued for divorce within a few weeks and the
home life returned to the status quo of no father just the few remaining
kids and mom. From all the stories, he had ever heard their father was
rarely ever home. The most interesting part of the story that his sister
told was a description of the interior of the room where the fight had
occurred. Plus, she also spoke specially of the time in his life when it
all happened. It was when he was a very young child which explained why he
never knew his father, ever. When he asked about his role in that day's
events, she said that he was a baby in the playpen in the corner.

If it was in his infancy and he was present standing in his playpen in the
room. He was likely crying, as any child would, due to the yelling and
scuffle that was occurring. That would have made it a very traumatic time
in that young mind. His stomach once again tightened and he felt like he
was about to retch. He swallowed as he grabbed at his stomach. That was it,
giants dancing outside in his bared view. The dream of the giants never
came into his sleep again because he now remembers that moment in his life
without consternation or at least he understood what was the cause of his
dream. Where he remembers it or not was unimportant, what mattered was the
dream stopped. He believed that the giants were simply grown adult people
and the bars were the rungs in the play pen. The young traumatized mind had
stuffed the memory away in a dark corner of his mind. But now that memory
was trying to get out to be reconciled. Yeah, one down one to go. The other
was more suspect and seemed deeper and sexual.

He was aware that as a youngster he had been sent to live for the summer in
a foster home. There were stories in the family of his being sent to live
with a farm family in a nearby town. It seemed that his mother could not
take care of all the children that still lived at home. His sister who was
a in high school at that time was made to stay home and take care of him
and his brothers if they were ever sick and could not attend their
school. David being the youngest presented additional problems during the
year also. When he returned from school he was told to go to the neighbors
for care until his mother or sister came home. This worked for a while but
then neighbors expected compensation which was outside of his mother's
means. Having his sister take care of sick days worked out but only for a
short time. The truant office came to the house one day and had a talk with
their mother about his sister's absence from school. Mother explained the
situation that she had to work and the sister, being a girl was not in need
of a formal education, and her time was better spent with house and
mothering chores and mom needed a babysitter. This of course fell on deaf
ears and the sister was ordered to return to classes. So, mom asked the
county to assist in dealing with the problem. It helped that she came from
a tight knit Pennsylvania Dutch family and that our uncle was the local
county judge.

The story from his sister went on and more details were told about his time
away from the family. Pictures were produced of him standing in front of
the farm house plus pictures of the farmer and his wife. After returning to
his home that night, a little tv was watched and then to bed to be followed
by sleep. When suddenly out of his brain came a bam, and there it was, that
dream again of the man walking away except this time it was clear as a
bell. The man was the farmer. He was walking very fast and talking back
over his shoulder. He was nude. The farmer said "Quick, put on your
cloths".

Now, as he set there in the dark of his adult bedroom he could see it
all. The dreamer was David dreaming not about a movie or any books it was
himself at that farm.  The image was the farmer, Mr. Snyder and the dream
was of Mr. Snyder jumping up from David's bed and looking out the window
then rushing from David's room. David rolled over and set up to look. From
the window of his second story bedroom he saw Mrs. Snyder's car pulling
into the drive. He jumped from the bed and went to the bathroom down the
hall. There he took some toilet paper from the roll and wiped his
bottom. The Vaseline was slick and he had to wipe with several grabs of
paper. He then returned down the hall and he could hear the farmer and his
wife talking in the kitchen below. He hurried to get his cut off shorts on
and his t-shirt, Next socks and shoes. Then down the stairs. Mrs. Snyder
said "HI, what you been up to"? David replied, "I had just been to the
bathroom".

David had been removed from his home and told that this was just for a
little while and that he would be back home soon. The farm was a nice neat
farm located a short drive outside of a small Pennsylvania town. The area
was a combination of rolling hills and flat fertile farm fields. The house
was typical stone and frame building that was common to the area with a
large barn for the dairy cows and small shed for smaller live stock.

When David had first arrived here he was taken around to see all the
animals. As part of his stay he would be expected to help Mr. Snyder with
some simple chores and be given a regular set of duties that he would be
expected to tend to everyday. Life as he would get to know was slow and
gentle here and much to his liking.  Some nights while in his bed and
looking out the window he would slob at the loss of his home and friend
from next door and think of his mother and brothers and sister. But time
lessened those tears and he settled into the routine of farm life.

One day in the late afternoon David was in the barn standing next to a cow
and watching the farmer milking. He was leaning against a pole when the
farmer turned to him and said, "Do you want to try" David nodded and
stepped forward. The farmer showed him how to take the rudder and squeeze
and pull down. The milk dribbled out and they laughed. His small hands were
note strong enough but he persisted and did get some minor results.

 From then on, each day he would be there as the cows came into the barn
from pasture and watch the farmer. After most of the cows had been milked
the farmer would gesture for David to step up and the farmer would have the
boy stand between his legs as he sat on the stool. The young boy could then
bend forward and reach under the cow to pull at the rudders. The farmer
would put his hand around the stomach of David and hold him tight as he
bent forward. Sometimes the farmer would jerk himself forward on the stool
so David could better reach. David would feel the forward movments and hear
the farmer making small groaning sounds but never thought anything of it.

On one day while the two of them were milking the farmer asked, "would you
like to taste what the milk tastes like now fresh from the udder"? David
turned and looked a little puzzled and said "OK". The farmer said, "get
down on your knees and put the rudder on your mouth and suck". David did so
and a shot of milk came out. It was hot to the tongue but sweeter then the
cool milk he had drank at meal times. The farmer said, "see, isn't that
good"? David nodded and did it again. After that it became a regular thing
to end the milking with getting down and drinking some sweet hot milk.

There then came a day when the farmer and David were finished with the days
chores and putting the milk pales away in the milking parlor when
Mr. Snyder stopped to relieve himself off the side of the closed
door. David was standing near and turned to look at the farmer and watch as
the urine paused for his cock. The farmed looked at David and then down to
his cock and as he finished turned in David's direction and gestured with
his hand for David to step forward and take a closer look. David looked up
at the farmers face and the farmer smiled. So, David turned his face back
to the now slightly raised cock and stared. The farmer said, "It's just
like yours" David replied, "It's bigger". The farmer said," it's OK, you
can touch it". David did and looked up and smiled.  David said, "It's as
big as the cows" meaning the udder. The farmer laughed. David looked up and
smiled. The farmer said," yes, it is and it works just like the cows, take
it into your hand and milk me". Putting his hand around the now bigger cock
and squeezed with a small pull. The farmer straightened up and said," do
that a little faster than you do with the cows". David did and kept
pulling. Then stopped and looked up. "Nothing is coming". The farmer
replied, "Oh that's because I'm older and you didn't put it into your mouth
like you do with the cows". David smiled and let go of the cock. The farmer
put his cock back in his pants and knelt down to take hold of David by the
shoulders and said," This is something that only us men do, the woman don't
like us to do this and we can never tell anybody when we do. Do you
understand". David shook his head in a confirmation and said, "OK". The
farmer said, "this will be our secret and we must never tell anyone". That
was the beginnings of a bond between the farmer and David that would last
into David's adult years.

David came to stay there with only a few cloths which were mostly hand me
downs from his older brothers. Many of which were wore by several brothers
before they came to cover David's small frame. His only shorts were at
least a couple sizes too big and he had to wear a belt, which was also many
inches to long to keep the shorts up. To say these shorts where tread bare
was a miss statement but hey where all he had for hot days. Another garment
was a pair of jean pants that were also large but rather ragged at the
knees. Mr. Snyder took these pants and noting to his wife that they were
looking very poorly took out his knife and before the wife could caution
him. The pants leg was off. Then the other. "They're too short" said
Mrs. Snyder complaining but the damage was done. The farmer called David in
and told him to remove his shorts and try these on. David did so and of
course as the wife had remanded they were short, Too short. The bottom of
the pockets hung out of the legs. The farmer laughed and David said, "There
very cool". To which Mrs. Snyder said, "Yup and we can almost see your
privates".

The shorts became a favorite of David's and he ware them regularly. A side
advantage to David was that he could easily reach up this shorts leg
opening and pull his penis out and pee when out at play. When David was a
play or working around the barn yard and bent over or set on cross legged
on the ground pulling weeds or picking vegetables in the garden,
Mrs. Snyder was right about the exposure of his privates. She was rarely
outside the house so the only one to notice was the farmer.

The play that had started in the barn moved to the house when Mrs. Snyder
got a job in the local town. This gave the farmer and his student a free
wheel of the house for the continuation of David's training. The farmer
would have David milking him in the milking parlor at first but this new
situation became easier in the kitchen of the house. Once David became
accustom to the fact the farmer's cock was slower to give rewards then the
cows he learned to spent more time stroking and sucking as instructed. With
the misses gone for the day new games could be taught to what was becoming
a willing player. David was also becoming very attached to this older male
figure and instinctively was seeking to please what he had never had
before, a father.

When the twosome would be in the house alone for lunches a new game was
introduced. David was told to go take a bath after eating and when playing
in the water would be joined in the bathroom by the farmer. The farmer
would knee next to the tub and wash David's back and shampoo David's
hair. After some washing and idol talk David was told to pull the plug and
stand up in the tub and the farmer would rub David body and thoroughly dry
him from head to toe with a towel. After which he was told to go to his bed
and jump into it. David would run off and jump on his bed and lay there on
his stomach and wait for the coming fun. The farmer would remove his
clothing and with a finger apply a smooth touch of Vaseline to David's butt
crack and cheeks. The farmer would then lay his large frame, gently on top
of the young boy and slip his now hard cock between the boy's thighs and
pleasure himself. David was accustomed to just lying there being quiet as
the man slide his cock in and out and listen to the moans. He got so he
could tell by the sounds of the breathing that the game was ending. David
waited until the farmer was himself quiet and would roll off. This became
an occasional deviation from the quite daily life of the now two best
friends. David in his short shorts was a beautiful site to the farmer and
David even as a youngest was developing a natural sex play attitude.

When no one, but the farmer could see, David while walking by might lift
his shorts to expose his penis and balls to the farmer and laugh. Or he
would set with his legs spread wide when setting on the fence, facing where
he knew the farmer was about to pass. After Mrs. Snyder left for work David
would go behind the barn or house and remove his underwear then put his
shorts back on. Then go about playing or working around the barn and
fields. He enjoyed the breeze and the looks he was receiving from the
farmer. The farmer may have started something he was too old to keep up
with because David was now the aggressor and tempting for attention. He was
too young for an orgasm but the animal instances and needs for loving were
being awakened. David had become what psychologists call a "People
pleaser", meaning he had a need to have the farmer use him for
pleasure. That can be quite a burden for the person who is the object of
David's attentions. What the farmer had inadvertently created was a demand
for his attentions to David. David would now maintain this personality for
the rest of his life.

It was not unusual that when Mrs. Snyder drove off to town for David to run
in the house and upstairs where he would remove his cloths and go to the
window which faced the barn and stand there holding open the curtains and
wait. The first time he did it, he had to wait for the farmer to walk out
and then David banged on the window until he was noticed. The farmer looked
up and it stopped him dead in his tracks. David smiled and waved for the
farmer to come in the house. Which of course he did without hesitation.

The farmer had had David giving him blow jobs, but now David it was David's
turn. David being smaller had enticed the farmer into slipping David's
whole penis and balls into the farmers mouth and sucking on David. Of
course, there was no cum but to David, who had no knowledge of what would
one day squirt forth from him, that didn't matter. This was just something
that felt great and there was the instinct that now, he was to have control
of the relationship and be the one that was being pleasured. David was the
whore in the relationship. And like all whores the control was what became
the psychological reward.

After the summer on the farm David was once again torn from what had become
his home and was returned to his birth family. For now, his mother could
have him returning home with no fear of truant problems because David was
old enough to come home after school and take care of himself. The return
was as bitter sweet as could be imagined in this young boy's life. He was
not only leaving the comfort of this established home but he was losing
what, in his young developing mind, was a rewarding and fun relationship of
secret father and son pleasures.  David as promised, never revealed any of
the secrets that he had been pledged to keep. And within a few months, his
young mind just put everything in that dark quite part of the human brain
where such thoughts and memories go to hide and protect.

Footnote: At the age of 16 David saw Mr. Snyder working in the town park
and walked over to him and introduced himself. David had long since
forgotten all the relations that he and Mr. Snyder had shared. David just
remembered him as the nice farmer that he lived with once. Mr. Snyder eyes
popped when this young man said, "HI, I'm Dale". They exchanged a few
niceties and then Mr. Snyder shuffled a way. It was only when as a man of
36 years that David started to dream and remember.

Chapter Two, Oh those Youthful Years.

As the years passed David just had a typical preteen's life. There were
plenty of other kids in the neighborhood to play with but only when his
chores and paper route were done. The family home was in a rowhouse
block. Out the front door was the wonderment of the woods and fields
because there block of homes was the edge of the city. But out the back
doors were the bustling city. The kids of the back door were city friends
and that was where school was but the front door was a whole different
world. There the kids were wise on which tree made the best bows and arrows
and which gorge was best for sliding in a cardboard box. There were snakes
of the garter and milk variety. They were harmless and could be grabbed as
they slithered though the weeds. A handful could be gathered and held on
high to show one's mastery of boyhood life skills.

David and Harold plus Johnny who lived across the alley from the boys would
often gather in David's backyard to play in the dirt where the sidewalk ran
between the garage and a hedge fence that separated the yards. In the hot
summer months, the sidewalk that they sat on was cool and the hedge served
as a make-believe forest where their little plastic Indians could ambush
the little cowboy who roamed the imaginary plains of the patch of dirt
nestled between the sidewalk and the hedge. On other days, there were tanks
and trucks with plastic soldiers that would fight many loud and dusty
battles.

The boys were in their shorts and no shirts so the sweat ran down their
bare backs and made rivulets in the dust on their skin. They would play for
hours and hours. David was still wearing the hand me down cloths from his
older brothers and liked to not wear underwear because of the coolness that
he could feel on his balls and penis. He was the older of the bunch by a
year and therefore did have influence over the other two. He at some point
told the boys of how cool it was to not wear under pants and before long
both boys took to doing the same as David. David liked the way the cocks
and balls of the other boys would often be exposed as they sat or crawled
around on the sidewalk. He would make believe that he was just setting back
and letting the boys run the battles and just watch how their privates came
and went and played peek-a-boo in and out of their pants legs.

The YMCA was only a few blocks from David's home. Because he was from a
broken home the usual membership was waved. As part of the program for
preteen boys there was a weekly time for swimming. The pool was a
regulation Olympic size. The swimming program was divided up so that
preteen boys were separated from the teen boys and men. A very interesting
part of the program was that the preteen boys were prohibited from wearing
bathing trunks. So, during the hour that the boys were in the pool there
were nothing but bare bottoms and swinging dicks walking around and jumping
in the water.

One of the rules in the pool was that all the boys had to stay in the
shallower end of the pool. The life guard was the only adult in there and
he wore a swimming suit and just sat on hid chair and spun his whistle
around on his finger. David found an interesting thing about the pool
equipment. Around the edge of the pool there was a gutter that water
splashed into and then ran down into a drain, it would also be likely that
there was another way that water was drained from the pool and then run
through a filtering system. After being filtered the water is injected back
into the pool. More than likely few people ever knew where this injection
of filtered water was occurring. But David did. A couple feet below the
edge of the gutter on the side in the shallow end of the pool there was two
4 inch plates with holes. Here is where the returning water came back into
the pool with considerable force. The force was not huge and it pulsed.

David found this inlet quite by accident while swimming along the side of
the pool. The water was warm and when he got right in front of the inlet it
pushed against his cock and washed it back and forth. David would stand
against the inlet and cross his arms on the gutter and lay his head on his
arms like he was just resting. The water would pulse and give him a hard
on. He was not of the age of puberty yet so there was no orgasm but it sure
felt great. For the next two years David never missed a swimming class and
never let on what he was doing hanging on the side of the pool.

Chapter Three, "What was That?"

One day at the age of 12 David was down in the woods and alone. He usually
started the day alone since he was the local morning newspaper
carrier. This got him up before dawn and out to carry the papers around the
near area. So, when finished he was out and about before most of the other
kids were awakened. None of his friends even knew that he was already done
with his job before they showed up for play. As he wondered about in the
woods he came to where they, the kids had hung a thick rope from a large
tree, it was on the side of a bank and when you would swing from that bank
you would pass out over the ditch and yell as if you were the great and
magnificent Tarzan.  David found himself now down at the bottom of the
ditch and the rope was just hanging straight down and quiet, He had seen
this kind of rope in the gym at school and knew that the coach always made
the older boys climb it to the ceiling of the building. He looked at this
rope hanging from the tree and thought, Hell, I can do that right here. The
tree limb that it was attached to was at a considerable height but still
attainable. So, with every bit of his young youthful exorbitance he started
up.

Now the technique of climbing a rope is much different from climbing a hill
or stairs or most anything else. Except a pole. A pole or a hanging rope
requires a special skill called shinning. That is to grab high with your
hands and pull yourself up then when your face reaches where your hands
are, you lift your legs and rap them around the rope and squeeze your legs
together and hold yourself at that spot while you once again reach up as
high as possible to just repeat that motion. Over and over as you rise the
pole or in this case a rope.

One of the things that David found out that morning, was that this motion
of moving the main trunk of his body was doing almost that of a human male
having inner course in what has been called Doggy Style. Something that he
as a 12-year-old had never yet experience was an orgasm. As he reached and
pulled then raised his lower body up to his middle was exactly that, an
orgasm, his first orgasm. Yahoo, well more like "What the hell was
that". That stopped him in his tracks or climb and he slowly slide down the
rope while looking around and in total amazement stood at the bottom of the
rope, feet on the ground, looking up the rope and thinking, What? Next
thing was, you guessed it, try and climb the rope again, but to no
avail. The exact motion was there but not the same result. He of course
told no one and looked down at the wet spot on his jeans and wandered.

One day while at play with other young boys a blanket tent was erected in
Andy's yard. The boys were all setting around in the tent and along came
Andy's older brother and he sticks his head in the tee Pee. He quite
quickly picks up on the conversation and hauls out his cock for show the
little boys what a real Wacker looks like. Well, the younger boys are a
gasp or amazed because he is quite a bit older and has a sizably larger
cock than any of them. He of course had to show the younger kids that when
you stroke this thing it gets even bigger. It's a good thing that he did
not take it to the ultimate ending. Because at this point some of the boys
might have passed out or at least just went running home in tears about
their own inadequate equipment. Harold and David were among the small group
and were also impressed. Lenny was the older boy and while kneeling there
with his cock in hand he talked about the proper use of one's cock and the
proper misuse of it. Hell, every knows that masturbation is not a misuse
but the boys didn't, not yet. Anyway, just telling them about how an orgasm
can be attained was good enough to send everyone running for the bathroom
and it's supply of tissues. David now under stood what happened on the rope
and how to repeat it and repeat it.

The erections and orgasms now started. David like every other boy before
him and since, no matter what they tell you, will have their hands in their
pants whenever they and now he could. The following year was wet and
sticky.

Chapter Four, Hello Harold.

A very interesting thing had been going on in David's home and the home of
his next-door friend that now applies to David's life was sleep overs. His
best friend from next doors was Harold. David's mother being single and
Harold's parents are real party goers. For either parent to get out on a
weekend night requires a babysitter. By now David's older brothers and
sister are married and gone, so, a very nice arrangement was that David was
encouraged to sleep over at the neighbor's house. This was going on since
David was born. Before the foster deal he often slept over even though he
had a sister to watch him and after David was return to his birth family
the sleep overs were even more encouraged. The two boys were very good
friends and played together constantly. They did everything together. In
the hot Summer, they often slept on David's back porch. In the cooler
months, they slept in Harold bed. David only had a single bed and Harold
had a double size bed.

Harold and David were both appreciating the grand feelings that a human
orgasm brought with it. They eventually started to talk to each other about
what they had discovered. Harold was so proud that he had discovered that
if he while taking a bath could get hard and make believe he was a
submarine and his cock was the periscope. Every young boy had tried that at
least once or twice. Even a few men. The modern kids who take showers and
don't even have a tub are missing a really, cool thing. Getting the tub
full to just the right depth and making lots of soap bubbles and peek your
get your dick hard, which is extremely easy for a teen boy and it will
surface up through the bubbles all on its own. That big strawberry shaped
purple head does resemble the conning tower of a sub, well maybe to the
individual imagination it does.

Harold told how after jerking off in the tub the seaman just blended into
the water with the soap bubbles. Harold biggest contribution to this
wonderment was that with his cock at full erection and the head peeking
above the surface he could take a fly that he had previously caught, remove
the wings and set it on top. The fly would walk around and around,
stimulating Harold. It was also noted that the moment he came. The fly
would walk off the head and swim away.

David's house had three bedrooms and by this time all of David's brothers
and sister were married, David's mother slept in the largest room and David
the smaller one. So that left the middle-sized room empty. His mother could
always use more money so she rented that room to an older gentleman named
Chip. Chip wasn't really that old, more, late middle aged and a very nice
man. Chip was widowed for many years. In Chips room was a steel cabinet
that he used as a closet for his cloths. One day after Chip had not been
there for very long, David was home alone and got nosey. David sneaked into
the room and opened the cabinet. Inside on the bottom he found a shoe box
and opened it. There in the box was what at that time was a small paper
books of drawn pictures. These pictures when viewed in sequence were
drawings of man with huge cocks and as David flipped the pages these
drawing showed cartoon characters fucking women. The pictures were very
explicit and greatly exaggerated. The men were unshaven and naked with huge
cocks that they had stuck into naked woman. There were pictures with juices
squirting out of the woman and the men's tongue were hanging out of their
mouths as they screwed away. Other pictures had men jerking off and
shooting fluids several feet from the ends of their cocks. The cocks were
always huge and exaggerated in their hands.

The pictures were very crude but to a young boy they were good enough to
cause a hard on and while flipping pages David quickly had his hand in his
pants and playing. I wasn't long and his fly was open and his cock was out
and being stroked. There were several paperback books and another regular
book called Bliss. David read that one and found it to be great for keeping
his cock hard for many, many pages. From then on when David was alone in
the house he would go up and get the books and set in the corned with no
pants on and play with himself as he read. He never told Harold or anyone
else about the books, these were for his own pleasure. Harold had his
flies.

Most every time David had his cock out to pee he would start to stroke
it. He could squirt a good load and on one occasion he caught some on his
finger and touched it to his lips. It was smooth and he slide his finger
around to cover both lips. His tongue licked out at the wetness and he
tasted the thick white salty liquid. It seemed very familiar to him and he
wondered where he had tasted suck a flavor. By this time almost all his
early memories of the farmer had been hidden away in the dark reaches of
his mind. His secrets had become lost memories.

On the corner was a small grocery store. David was sent there many times
for one thing or another. The store was owned by Paul. The locals called
him Pauli. On many days if David went to the store there would be
neighborhood woman in there picking up something for that days dinner. But
on this day the store was empty except of course for Pauli. On that one day
Pauli asked David if he had ever seen a Chinchilla. David had not and was
told by Pauli that he raised them in the cellar of the store. Pauli offered
to take David down to see them. David thought that that would be neat. So
down the old wooden steps they went David first and Pauli right behind
closing the door. David had not noticed that Pauli when walking to the
cellar door had flipped the little sign on the store door over so it said
I'll be right back on the outside and flipped the lock. Down in the cellar
around back of the big old coal furnace were cages on the floor. In the
cages were small fury Chinchillas. There were several running about. Pauli
said to David, "go ahead and reach down and pet them". David bent down and
stroked them and felt how soft they were. Pauli encouraged David to play
with the animals but David said the fencing was high. So, Pauli slipped his
hand around David's waist and leaned over which pushed David forward and
bent down. Pauli said," There, I'll hold you and you can play with
them". David did and Pauli held him tight, ever so tight.

David's child hood experiences with the farmer started to kick in and he
felt and an old familiar feeling. Pauli was holding David's ass close
against himself and David felt the lump against his bottom. David moved his
feet up onto his toes which raised his butt a little higher and started to
wiggle and twist ever so gentle. With slight movements David fit the lump
right between his cheeks and he could hear Pauli moan. David just stood
there on his toes and wiggle and slide up and down just enough that the
lump stayed in between his small cheeks. It was summer and David had on his
hand me down shorts that were big. He needed a belt just to keep them
up. The pant legs were much to large and hung open around his small
legs. Pauli's other hand was slide down and up into the leg opening and
Pauli was rubbing and massaging David's cheeks.  David, without thinking
just stood there on his toes and wiggled and pressed his head back against
Pauli. With great ease Pauli's finger slipped into one leg of David's
underware and just touched David's asshole. David jumped slightly which
caused his check to clamp together and Pauli let out a huge moan from his
throat.

Suddenly, Pauli stopped moaning and let go of David and said, "we better
get back upstairs". They both returned to the store level and David took
the bag that Pauli had place all the items that David had come for inside
and Pauli said, "no charge and please don't tell about the
Chinchillas". David left the store and wasn't exactly sure but thought he
knew what that all was about. David never told anyone about the cellar and
never went into the store unless he saw other people in there with Pauli.

Chapter Four, Girls?

One summer David's mother sent him to spend a few weeks with his brother's
family on their farm. His brother had three children which were David's
nephews and niece. Two were younger boys and the third was a girl named
Carol who was one month younger then David. She was very nice and good
looking and built like a brick shithouse.  All the kids played around the
farm. As it was inevitable Carol and David ended up in a small building
alone and it was time for "You show me yours and I'll show you mine" time,
which of course they did. David and Carol were both very young, about 14 so
nothing came of it until a year later.

The brother and his family came to visit David's home and the kids went
into the cellar to play and the idea came up of playing "Blind Man's
Bluff". A game where one is chosen to be the blind man and is blind folded
and the others hide. David volunteered to be the blind man and the game
started. David was smart enough to notice that He could see out from under
the blind fold just enough to see the others children's feet and shoes. The
object of the game is to feel your way around the room and see if you can
find another and then you must identify them after which they would be the
blind man.

Carol, did hide as did her two brothers. David started to roam around and
when I came near the boys he would recognize their feet and miss touching
them, eventually he found carol, which was his goal. David saw her shoes
and knowing the cellar well he positioned himself between the boys and her
and started to feel to see if he could identify the person he had
found. She was very well built for a young 14-year-old and she was very
cooperative about standing still as David felt her breasts over and
over. These games were played for as long as Carol and David could talk her
brothers into it. It was also played every time they came to visit. David
of course loved it as Carol was the first girl he had touched and David
could only guess she did also because she never complained. When it was her
turn David tied the blindfold loosely so she could also find the one she
wanted. Which turned out to be David and she would roam around and find him
and in doing so she would feel around David's body and touch his crouch and
David would take her hand and stick it into his very lose pants which he
had just loosened his belt and unbuttoned the top waist button after he had
hide out of sight of her brothers. She was very slow and gentle and slide
her hand down to find that David had removed his under pants the moment mom
told him they were coming to visit. She would feel David's cock which was
getting hard as she approached him. David taught her by whispering in her
ear to slide her hand up and down on his cock. She learned to jerk David
off. It was always very quickly done for at that age if a good wind was
blowing most boys will get hard while taking a pee outside. So, when David
was getting jerked off by his first female and even if it was his niece it
was immediate. Carol always wiped her hand off on David's shirt, which he
then wore the seaman spot with honor.

Chapter Five, Old Feelings Return.

Then what had to happen, happened. David had forgotten about his childhood
experiences with the farmer. But somewhere in the dark reaches of his mind
all that still existed. A hot summer night. Instead of being on the back
porch, were there was some cooler air, they were sleeping over in Harold's
bed. The air was completely still and the covers where kicked off onto the
floor. Both boys lay quietly on their backs just sweating when Harold says,
"It's too hot" and stands up and removes his under pants. He then lay back
down, now on his stomach. David agrees and stands and removes his
pants. Then lays back down on his back again. The two lay there and nothing
is said.

David's hand is palm up next to Harold's thigh. A slight movement of his
hand and it touches Harold. With his hand palm, up he was touching with
back of his fingers. With the fingers touching that way there is very
little pressure. By moving his hand, a tiny bit closer and with all his
fingers closed they lay flat against Harold's leg. Then David's hand moves
and begins to stroke the side of Harold's thigh. Up and down gently sliding
on the sheet. Harold rolls over just enough to just lift his hip up off the
sheet. David's fingers are no longer touching the leg and David straightens
his fingers out and his hand lays flat on the sheet. David's hand still
palms up slides sideways under Harold's hip. When his hand reached Harold
penis David stopped the slide and Harold rolled on top of the hand. David
now had Harold's cock in the palm of his hand and he closed it,
gently. They lay still both motionless and their breathing shortened. David
started to move his hand but Harold's weight restricted the movement. After
a few tries to move his hand David lay still again. Harold wisely lifted
his hips and rolled back so David's hand could move. David started to
stroke. Harold rolled even further until he was on his back. David released
his grip and waited until Harold was flat on his back. David, switching to
his other hand as he also rolled half way, David could reach over and take
Harold cock whole in his hand.  His hand grasps the stiff hard cock and his
finger rapped around and gentle took full hold of the arm hard shaft. They
both lie still and then David's hand and arm started to move. With the
gentleness that he stroked his own cock David slide up and down. He lay
there on his side with his arm out and Harold's cock in his hand, he could
see the silhouette with the window next to their bed in the back ground. He
stroked and his mouth was moist and he licked his lips.

The strokes were slow but purposeful. Not to short or too long. The cock
responded as only a 13 years cock can. It rose full and hard as blue
steel. A few more strokes and it was throbbing. In the dark, it could only
be a silhouette, against the slight light from a nearby street lamp,
shining through the window. David's hand was working it. The eruption was
great and seaman burst forth. As Harold moaned and the seaman ran down over
David's fingers. He continued to stroke as if milking those cows of his
youth. Harold gadded David's hand stopped the movement. Neither boy stoke a
word. David released Harold and both boys went to the bathroom across the
hall. Neither spoke not a single word. After washing hands and stomach they
slide back onto the bed and this time sleep came. Both feeling the calm of
the release. Harold from ejaculation and David from an inner secret need.

The next morning, David awakened as he always did early. From years of
rising to go forth to deliver his papers. He walked to the bathroom to
release the usual morning urination and then returned to the bedroom. He
sat on the edge and looked over his shoulder to see that Harold was still
asleep and on his back as David had left him the night before. Harold cock
was laying sideway across one side of his hip, his head facing
David. Slowly David turned and slide his knees up onto the bed and all in
one motion he was kneeing alongside Harold's waist. As he leaned forward,
his lips came down on the head of Harold's cock and David's tongue came out
to gather the head into his mouth. With a slow sucking, he started to close
his lips firmly around the head of Harold's cock and as it slide across his
tongue and to back of his mouth. With purpose David's tongue continued to
swipe the cock around and around. There was an awaking of Harold's cock and
it rose and stiffened. Harold eyes opened but he didn't make a sound. David
did the moving and the moaning. The seaman was hot and sweet and filled
David's mouth.

David was now older and what he had just done was purposeful this
time. When he sucked the farmers cock there was little notice as to exactly
what was being done. Now it was different and being done as a natural act
and need. David noticed Harold's cock for what it was, a pleasure. When he
took it into his mouth he felt the hardness and the strength of it but also
the smooth gentle texture as his tongue swirled around and over the
surface. The head felt to his tongue like velvet felt to his fingers. A
soft and very smooth surface while he was sliding deeper his tongue felt
the ridge as it went from the head to the tight stretched skin of the
shaft. David never hesitated as he went deeper wanting the whole of the
cock in his mouth and having it entering his throat. David found that
sucking was more a desire then just an act of passion. As the seaman came
in equal squirts David just swallowed and kept sucking for more.

Taking the still hardened cock from his mouth David noticed it's purple
color and then turned to Harold and asked," Was that good". And Harold
answered affirmatively with a smile.

The die was cast as they say. David and Harold had crossed the threshold of
innocent sex. They knew that what they had done and were about to continue
doing was, specially at that time, complete taboo. But teen boys have the
greatest sex drive of all. Girls of their age possessed a drive of their
own but women nor girls could imagine the drive that evolution had created
to guarantee the success of humanity. As innocent as new children playing
with themselves in their cribs, they both made a commitment to each other
to continue and never tell.

The woods, fields, Harold's cellar, David's back porch, and Harold's bed
was their meeting place for pleasure. With total abandonment, they reached
for the others cock and Harold joined David in developing a style of cock
sucking.  They fondled, stroked and sucked each other when the mood struck
either of them A simple pat or gesture and cocks rose and belt buckles
opened, pants dropped. Shorts were the uniform until the weather made that
impractical. Neither boy had a need to be a bi or gay sexual person. It was
just so much fun and done for the pure sexual enjoyment.

 As the next couple of years passed the friendship had no sexual bounds. On
a sleepover, on the back porch, they sucked and make-believe fucking,
that's what they called it. Make-believe fucking came into their
gamesmanship of sex one summer when David had an idea. He had heard about
men putting their cocks into men's rectums and thought about giving it a
try, neither he nor Harold had fucked yet and this just might be good. They
didn't have an idea for sure just what fucking a vagina was going to be
like so this was mostly a guess. That night instead on sucking Harold's
cock, he stroked himself hard and then asked Harold to lie on his stomach
and he lie on top of Harold. He then told Harold to open his legs a bit and
David reached down and stuck his cock down between Harold's legs and
putting his legs outside of Harold's he could pull his legs together and
Harold's legs would close tight also. That felt OK but then David started
to move in a fucking motion and then the feelings got even better. He came
and rolled off Harold. Harold asked, "Did that work? Was it good"? David
said, "yes" and told Harold to now do the same to him. The boys had found a
way to broaden their sex experience and did this make-believe fucking
whenever it was convenient but only on the back porch or away from home. It
was decided that doing that in the bed would be too noisy and they'd get
caught for sure.

Boys who live near fields and woods learn to make forts. At least that is
the descriptive term used to identify their hole in the ground slash hide
out. Literally they will dig a hole. It will be something about 10 feet by
10 feet and 4 feet deep. Then find some boards or branches to lay on top as
a covering. Add a hatch of some sort for an entrance and there it is, a
fort. It also is a great place to learn to smoke weeds. No not that,
regular milk weeds. It's a hollow dry weed that when lite can be a fake
cigarette. It also is a great place to get a blow job. A variation was when
a mattress was found and dragged into the woods then sticks and grasses
were woven into walls, add branches for a top and cover with grass and that
was maybe the best fort yet. It also was, when alone, the two-boy's daytime
fake fucking hide out.

Harold was a very good model airplane maker. David tried but was not very
good at it. The fact Harold was good and his father supported it was very
useful. Harold father set up a table and bench as a Minnie work shop in
their cellar. Harold would often be in the cellar working and David would
come out the back door of his house and jump the fence where he would land
on the outside cellar door of Harold's home. The doors would open and
Harold would gesture for David to come in. David would set and watch as
Harold would cut and glue wood and tissue together to make another model
fling machine. This was a bit boring after a while for David and he would
slide out of his chair and crawl under the table. Harold, not being a dummy
would stand up and drop his pants to his ankles, step out of them and set
back down. It only took a light tickling on the thighs and Harold's cock
would start to rise. David would have it in his mouth by then and Harold
would have to stop working and wait for David to finish building what he
came for. A nice skin flute.

Harold was circumcised and had a nice 6-inch cock while David's was equal
in length but uncut. Harold's had more thickness which pleased David. He
didn't know that there were smaller or bigger ones around and didn't
care. This was Harold's and David believed it was his to play with. David
was reacting to the people pleaser trait that the farmer had instilled in
him. This cock sucking is what he reacted to and wanted in his life.

Both boys had a good handful or mouthful of cock. In the very early
beginning of their playing Harold while stroking David managed to pull the
foreskin down until David's cock head was fully exposed. It was
unintentional and Harold never knew he had done it, But David sure
did. David noticed the stinging but said nothing. The next morning David
saw that there were spots of blood on his underwear. He took them, when
alone and sneaked them out of the house and into the garbage can in the
back yard. For the rest of David's life whenever he would pull the foreskin
back while washing it, he would remember Harold.

Chapter Six, Cars, Girls, and new experiences.

But then it happened. Cars, girls, and the relationship suddenly
changed. Harold and David both met girls that appealed to their hederal
sexual side and they found the softer touch and romance to be what they
craved. Because of their experiences they will always be the best of
friends and their commitment to one another is sealed and in the vault of
life.

The years passed and schoolyears came and went. David remained loyal to his
girlfriend and Harold did to his also. David had made a commitment to the
U.S. Navy. And after graduation he shipped out as they say. The Navy was a
good experience and being in Norfolk, Virginia he found himself on the
highway to home many weekends. On this one trip as he was hitch hiking on
the road a car pulled over. He ran up to it and opened the front passenger
door. The voice of a man asked if he wanted a ride and gestured him to get
in.

As they rode along there as the usual conversation and questions as to
where David was going and how was the Navy life. All seemed fine and then
the driver pulled or on the should of the road and asked if David had ever
wanted to have sex with a man to wish he lied and said that he had not
considered it. In one very smooth and quick movement the man was out of the
driver seat and opening David's belt and pants. David simple responded by
lifting his body off the seat so that his pants could be slide down off his
middle section and to his knees. The man had David's cock in his hand and
was stroking it. David just lay back and submitted as if he had planned it
himself. Quite easily the man next opened his belt and pulled his pants
down and climbed up and sat on David's lap. David felt his cock enter the
man's rectum and watched as the man moved up and down. It was as if he were
watching someone else, somewhere else then there. Almost as quickly as it
started it ended and the man was pulling his pants up and getting back
behind the steering wheel. The handed David a tissue and told him to wipe
his cock off.

David pulled his pants up and buttoned and tightened his belt as the man
said that he would be glad to take David to the next bus station where he
could catch a bus that would be going to David's home. Said thanks and sat
back as the car race through traffic an into the city. It wasn't long,
maybe an hour and David was setting at the bus station waiting for his
bus. The man, who shall remain nameless in David's memory was gone. On the
bus ride home David looked out the window as houses and scenery raced by
and thought of what had happened. In his mind, he went over and over every
movement that the man and he had made. The grabs the pushes the belts and
buttons opened, His participation. How he lifted his body and how he held
his hands and arm out so not to interfere as the man did what he must have
either practiced or accomplished many times before. Over and over David
rethought the moves. He then realized that the man had pulled a tub of
something out of the grove compartment and put something on David's
cock. How had he missed that? David reached into his pants as no one was
near his seat, and felt his cock. It was grease or lubricant. No wonder he
slid into the man's anise so easily. David also noticed that his cock was
hard as he thought about what happened. He was a willing participant,
damn. Who would have thought that he would fuck a man? But did he fuck him
or was it the man that fucked himself with David's consent. Damn! Who would
have thought? It wasn't that bad. It was a surprise and if the man had
asked David would have said no. Maybe if all the man had asked was to blow
David that would have been cool with him. If that man had asked maybe there
was more to be had. David knew he was not against men having sex with one
another. This sex that had just happened was different. He knew of it but
had never thought about doing it. Now that he had, it seemed that he might,
again. Where did all these thoughts come from?

David's latten memories were still in there somewhere but not yet
surfacing. Having a cock in his rectum was not new but he had no memories
of that. This was a different feeling to him. He had had his cock inside
another man. At that point, he just didn't remember much about those farm
days where he was the rectum that was being lubed and filled. Well the fake
fucking he and Harold used to do was very close to it but even than that
was new, except that his subconscious knew of it and there was that old
people pleaser factor of wanting to satisfy.  Was that again pushing him in
that direction? Now it would be sequestered again.

The Navy was very cool and had its fun times. Shore leave in lots of
countries and lots of beer and booze. The life was good but it was time to
go home. There was a girl at home that was the best girlfriend that a young
man could ever have. She was a b cup, blond hair, blue eyes and the nicest,
roundest ass ever to hold panties up. On the second date, she told David
that she never had sex and all her girlfriends had, and would he do it with
her. That must be the coolest thing ever told a 16-year-old boy, ever. She
had been there all the time he was away in the service and the one he was
rushing home to when he ended up with his cock in that guys ass. She never
knew and he was not going to tell her.

David was to have the worst day of his life. When he got home and went to
see his sole-mate she told him her father want to see him and have a
talk. The father likely had been hopping that David being away in the Navy
would end the relationship. After all this kid had been fucking his
daughter every time she would take her panties of. He didn't know that she
often didn't even ware panties when she was going out with David. The
father told David to leave and never see his daughter again. The heart
break was devastating and destroyed David's dreams and hopes.

David's life moved on and time passed and new girls came and went. A group
of young men and women would gather at a local bar every evening and the
guys would shoot darts and the women would hang out and watch. There was
about 10 each gender. Surprising they didn't date. None of the women or men
had any sexual attractions to each other. They were just the best of
friends. What their game was, that at 10 PM every night but Sunday they
would all climb into their cars and head out to one of the many clubs in
the area. Once there they would pull tables together and commence to drink
and dance the night away. At 2 PM they would separate and head home to
sleep and raise the next morning for work.

One of the men was a hefty lad called by the other's Big Daddy. Daddy was a
very nice and gentle man. He hung out with the group at the bar but always
disappeared when everyone else headed out to the clubs. David was excepted
into the group with open arms by many of the men because he was there
school mate. David developed a close friendship with Daddy. But he never
asked or understood why Daddy never followed the gang. One evening David
noticed Daddy was not present and asked about him. He was told that Daddy
had moved to New York to get a job.

A few months passed and David heard that Daddy was back intown but only for
a visit to see his mother. David took the next day to go by Daddies mothers
home to visit. He was taken aback when Daddy answered the door with
lipstick on and eye shadow. After greetings David stepped back from Daddy
and gave him a pose like the Fonzie would do and said, "what's
happening". Daddy simply said, "I've never been happier". Daddy told David
of his experience in New York where on one evening at a local bar he was
seduced by a gay man and found he was doing things that he had only dreamed
of for years.

David was raised in a home where the discussions about people that were
different then his brothers were garbage to be avoided at all cost. All
peoples of any type, color, religion nationality that may be different were
to, cursed. The brothers made no exceptions. Yet David who attended schools
with all kinds of children never saw a difference. He just never thought
about such things.

David's marriage was to another girl who couldn't keep her panties on
either. Which is what eventually led to their divorce. It seemed her
panties didn't have an elastic waist and kept falling off in the presence
of men. Many men.

After the sting of the divorce passed, another much nicer beauty, like his
first girlfriend managed to track him down and get a proposal from
him. They married and led a very fruitful life with great prosperity and
children and a bunch of grand babies. Eventually those old memories where
bound to surface and that is where we started with the awakenings in" The
Dark".

Chapter Seven, Bi what does Bi mean?

The sex dwindled in the later years of their marriage but not the love. The
love did vex and flow but it hung in there. A marriage is full of potholes
no matter who they are. Some are big and deep and others wide. But love and
companionship seem to hold on if you're lucky.

Those memories that started this writing came out along the way. Mostly in
the latter years of their marriage and maybe it was that lack of sex that
stimulated them to the surface. The dreams surface and the memories
followed David was amazed to remember and learn of his past. The visions
came and then some words from family and finally the things that he
promised to never tell nor want to. Now they were part of his life again
and he had to restrict what he told.

A conversation with his sister occurred again. This time he was telling her
facts and she was confirming and disagreeing with them. She had always felt
shame and disappointment in herself because she could not stay home and
take care of her little brothers. She had felt that David's fostering was
her fault. If she had known of the sexual abuse that he had gone through
she would have been devastated. So, he was careful not to mention the
degree to which he was used to satisfy that old farmer's needs. It's
considered statutory rape for an adult to have any sexual conduct with a
minor. Yet, in David's mind, as he learned of it there was no ill will to
the farmer. It had all been a game to the child and even that it was an
abuse but the adult David never saw it that way. His view and conscience
was clear. There was no feelings of abuse now and as he could remember
there were on feelings of being abused then. There never was pain or
disappointment. No hurtful admonishments and actually, David was the
aggressor and was seeking out the attention.

The memories that came out were scattered over several years of David's
older life. David's sorted them out and arranged them as he remembered
incidents and could develop a time line. Sometimes a new memory came that
caused a reshuffling of facts. Some fantasies came in and had to be
discarded as just fantasies. But finally, at this writing the facts are all
discovered, labeled and fitted into the time line. There is no doubt that
the farmer started a tradition that flowered into a full-blown sex drive at
the age of 9-years-old in David and then it was put a side and secreted for
a few years to again surface as if a plant needing water to grow in his
teen years with Harold being the recipient of the fruit. Then as it slowed
and quieted, a stranger in a black car along a highway in Virginia stoked
it alive for a moment. Then it was sent into full hibernation by women and
love to family. Even though it tried to surface during those family years
it was contained.

Craig's list is a very interested website. The postings are malice at
best. Even though they continue to attract attention they, to some, are
abusive while others find joy and hope in the same posting. Some are
pleased for attention and others are desire to find joy from pain either
receiving or giving it.

As the sex dwindled in David, due to a combination of operations,
medications and just desire, there was one thing that kept hanging
on. Desire, it was always coming to mind. To find some relief, porn was
introduced into David's life. Which caused masturbation to flourish for a
time.  But as any man can attest that can grew old and all the porn starts
to look alike except for the species and the participants sex desires and
equipment, there is little difference on the screen. Prostitution is just
not worth it, too much guilt. Then there are those man for man
postings. But yuck, those people are scary. And they have maladies that can
kill you.

David started to wonder where the farmer was. Likely in his grave. That old
girlfriend had died.  How about a different farmer? One that was, first of
all, alive. An older man to be a friend, like Harold. How about Harold? No,
he lives to far Away and my not be into that any more. No, the farmer idea
is it. He doesn't have to be a farmer, just a gentleman. A nice easy-going
guy who lives nearby and can have David over for a regular get together
occasionally. After starting to except the situation and think about a
Harold instead of a farmer the old secrets and feelings started to wake
up. Yes, he had thought about all of this. He had worked on the timeline
and figured out the truths from the fantasies. But he had not really given
this a full consideration is it possible without screwing everything else
up?

A Craig's list posting of his own was the first trick. From what he had
read on the net he had to follow some rules of writing and eventually
interactions. The ad had to have age, height, weight, size of cock,
circumcised or not and some specifics of what David wanted and
expected. That would be easy enough.  His first posting read: Hi I am 75,
6', 210#, 6" uncut- that meant not circumcised, I would like to find a
friend to hang out with.

The replies started to come in. "Where are you located". "I want to suck
your cock." "I want you to suck my cock." "I need a blow job." "How old are
you." "Can you host", that was a big one. David was amazing how few of
these men could not have a person come to their homes for sex. So many just
said, "Location". That meant, that they could not host. And if David
answered with almost any answer they usually were gone never to be heard
from again. So many times, if David answered a reply to his posting there
was no further emails. He thought what am I supposed to write. "I want to
sneak up behind you and stick my cock in your ass and when I finish fucking
you I will turn you around and shoot in your eye". They could be such gross
people.

Then David figure this one out. Most were married men like himself who were
classified as bisexual men. David tried to answer them and received more
replies and re-replies and re-re-replies. This went on for a couple
years. Nothing but questions and undesirable emails. At least that is what
David thought. Where is the civility? Doesn't anyone what to meet and talk
about what we might do for each other, instead of just to each other? What
about outside of the bedroom or backseats? The facts became evident, no
they didn't care about that. Just, can I stick my cock into you or can you
stick your cock into me. Or both. That was it, for two years, no matter how
David phased it the answers were about the same. He was no Puritan but then
he wasn't a whore either.

David was aware that someone was going to stick their cock into him and he
hoped he into them. But he wanted to be sure no one died in the
process. Especially him. Finally, after two years of occasionally posting
and constantly ready other people's posts. A thought of a message that did
not feel threatening. David had posted a message offing a massage to
people. He had been receiving wonderful straight massages, himself with no
kinky stuff for years and so why not offer to give one to men? He had
received nice ones and figured he could do that for others but, with the
kink. The message he received almost immediately was from a man who lived
quite far away but David thought that this was a chance to see if the old
urges were real and would he fit back into that groove again. So, he made
arrangement and drove off.

After an hour and a half drive and a quick stop at a drug store for some
coconut oil, David pulled up in front of an old Victorian house on a
mountain top with a beautiful view. He walked up to the door and rang the
bell. An older man opened and after introductions he was ushered into the
room and through into the large old kitchen. A big old wood stove was in
the center of one wall a nice medal kitchen table at the window with a
great view of a pond and rolling mountains. The man was about his age and
talked very nice and softly asked him to set down and join him in a cup of
tea. Perfect is all David could say to himself. The man was a retired
school teacher and they talked about education and where they were in the
mountains. The house was of great interest to David since he was a home
builder by profession.

After the tea and some general conversation, the man and David walked
through the houses first floor and discussed the furniture and
architecture. When they had seen all of the first floor the man asked David
if he would like to see the second-floor bedrooms. David concurred and they
rose the old creaky stairs. At the top where wonderful old pictures hung
the walls of yellowing wallpapers. The place was an old museum. David was
led to a bedroom with a huge wooden bed that must date back to the
mid-eighteen-hundreds. David asked," would you like a massage?" The answer
was immediately a "yes". David and the man undressed and the man lay on the
bed on his stomach as David had instructed. David climbed onto the bed and
sat with his legs under him and applied some light scentless oil to his
hands. The moment his hands touch the shoulders of the man there was a
moan. It continued all through the massage. David thought, Oh Boy.  As
David worked the oil around on the shoulders, then the back he slowly moved
down and turning his body so he could reach the butt and then legs. When
David reached the legs he slowly took a foot up and massaged each toe and
heel then the ankle. Working slow and softly he then started slide his
hands first on one calf and then the other. He next ran his hands, one on
each side of the thigh and moved up and down massaging until his hand on
the inside of the lag was all the way up to the bottom of the crutch and
there he stopped and massaged for a moment. Now He got up from the bed and
walked around to the other side. The man said, "Oh please just slide across
me". But David was on the other side by then and climbed on that side and
sat as before with his legs under him.

David massaged as he did before, starting at the top and ending with his
fingers touching the bottom of the man's balls He paid special attention to
rubbing the area between the legs and ass and to the balls. David now asked
the man to roll over and he did. David put some oil on the man's chest and
rubbed it around, stopping at each nipple and rubbing around and around
each. Then David Stepped one leg across the man and was kneeling on each
side of his hips David rubbed the chest and then sat up straight and
reaching under himself took the man cock, which was hard and rubbed the
head of it on David's asshole. David quickly reached under himself and
rubbed his oily hand on his butt and asshole then continued to rub the
man's cock around and around his hole. The man raised up his upper body and
grabbed David's head and kissed him hard. David's tongue shot out to meet
the mans and David held the weight until the man fell back to the bed/
David rolled over to the one side of the man and lay against him. David put
his head on the man's chest and raped one leg over the man's wrist. The man
grabbed his own cock and started to jerk himself off. David lay motion less
as the man jerked and then shot his load onto David's inner thigh. It was
done. David got up and wiped the seaman from his leg and the man said," gay
sex is so messy,", "that was the best".

After they returned to the first floor the man offered to have David take a
shower in the bathroom and David did. When their cloths where all on David
thanked the man, and went to the door, the man followed and gave David a
kiss and David left.

The ride home was long and slow but the feelings were monumental. His first
roll with a man since the man in the black car and it was so sweet. This
what he had hoped for all the past two years of the abuses on the net and
the disappointments. This what he had in those many, many years ago on the
farm. Someone who appreciated him and the things he could do make them feel
good.

After David returned home he went straight to his computer and typed out a
posting on Craig's list expounding how much fun it was to finally find a
gentleman who appreciated his efforts. Of course, the responses where
predictable.  For the next couple of months there was not a posting or
response that David found worthy. He now had a standard. The bar had been
set and he was not going to lower it. He had respect for who and what he
was again. That farmer did him a favor and set him out on the path with
gifts and he was going to hold them up for all to want.

That also meant that he would have little action. But the real thing was
worth waiting for this last time and it would be again. And it was, it came
sooner than he expected and from the same source the internet. He posted
the same posting as last time. It was quick and to the point. Older man
wanted to have him over. This man was interested to have David stop by, get
naked and just hang out. That sounded very cool and so David set out
again. This time it was not so far and a lot easier to find. An apartment
in the nearby city. He announced himself over the communicator at the
building and was buzzed in. Up the stairs, and there was the apartment
number he had been given the door cracked open and them swung open to
reveal a nude man standing there. "Come in" and David said, "Hi I'm David".

The apartment was small. A kitchenette, a door to the bathroom then several
feet and a chair a couch a huge TV and finally an arch way to a bed
room. Pictures on the that David asked if they were family and was told
about each one. Daughters, ex-wife, grandchildren. Places The man had
been. David took of his cloths and sat down on the chair. A conversation
ensued and David learned of the man's profession and the man learned of
David's. Then the man turned on the TV and they talked and watched as the
man went from channel to channel until he stopped on a channel for nude
people to see and talk to each other, They talked to people from all
over. Each as naked a Jay Bird. Even a man in England it was fun and very
relaxing.

After about two hours the man said he had an appointment so David got up
and dressed. As he was being let out the door the man gave David his phone
number and said, "Let's do this again". David asked if next week would do
and the answers yes. David left and on the way home thought that that was a
decent person and he had shown that he was also.

The next week David was at the door when the nude man opened It
again. Everything went about the same including the internet chats. And
again, David left with an agreement to return same time same place next
week. But David received an email saying that the man could not make it but
would look forward to the following week if David was free. David email
back that he would be there and asked if the man had any interests in that
massage he had posted that led to the first meeting. The answered right
back that he would look forward to it.

That week David arrived with great excitement but kept himself as calm as
he could. The door opened and the nude welcomed David and they went in and
David noticed as he was undressing that the man was standing watching him
after David was nude the turned and gestured David to go into the
bedroom. The man lay on the bed, face down and David knelt next to him and
right into massaging the man. As with his now pattern for massages that he
learned from the last one he started at the neck. He did everything the
same up until the part where he sat across the last man this time David did
not. He asked the man to roll over and started to rub hid front and then
legs but when David got to the man's waist he bent forward and took the
man's cock into his mouth and started to suck. David gave the man a good
blow job except the man didn't cum. David kept sucking and working at the
cock but it was semi soft and didn't respond. Finally, the man spoke and
said medications. David stopped and smiled. David lay next to the man and
stroked him with his hand and after several minutes of stroking David
rolled to the man and again took his cock into David mouth and sucked. This
went on for atleast an hour. David sucked then stroked and suck
again. Finally, David said," Is there anything you would like me to do?"
The man Said," would you mind if I set in my chair and talk to my friend in
England as you blow me?" David said," no, if that helps, It's cool with
me."

The man got up from the bed and turned on the TV and then the computer and
with a few clicks of the mouse the man in England appeared setting at his
computer, nude of course. They talked as this man set down in his chair and
introduced David as his house boy and gestured to David to acknowledge the
TV. David waved to the English man and knelt and stated to suck. The two
men chatted and David sucked, while thinking, "this is cool, I'm an
international cocksucker". Finally, the men stopped talking and the TV was
shut off. The man said," I want to thank you, I will be known as the
neatest dude in the world when he tells everyone about this." David dressed
and left. On the drive home he thought, "ain't I something".

Over the months that followed both men contacted David several times
without David doing any posting.  Each man requested that David come to
visit them at their homes and give them massages. David did so and now
after each massage was given blow jobs from the men. David considered the
blow jobs to be a wonderful addition but the real reward was that he was
being requested to return. There was a great deal satisfaction knowing that
he was so appreciated.

Chapter Eight, New digs and friend.

The weather turned cool and then cold as the seasons passed. David took his
wife and headed South to spend the winter in more hospitable temperatures,
in his home there. As time was passing the horns started to grow. Now that
he had found a new or old way to express himself he thought why not here
also. Crank up the computer and let's see what's happening on the Southern
version of Criag's list. The chatter here was about the same but the number
of participants was much less. David thought that that must be because the
populations age was much older. As he read postings it became evident that
this was more about ED and sucking instead of the Northern chatter which
dwelled on fucking discussions. This was looking like more of David's type
then all the young crazies' postings that he had encountered up North.

So, the search began anew. David just started to watch and read as the
daily postings came across the screen. I need a BJ, suck this, blow me, 55+
blow Jobs. Yup, these are my people David thought. So, after several weeks
of occasional watching David throw a posting of his own out. I like to
suck, it read. Well the replies came from all over the area. But none
really grabbed at him. So many disrespectful garbage. He tried another
approach. Older dud wants a friend, normally the guys would just say FWB
but David liked being different and more up front. Some replies with less
vigor. Which was to David's liking. Then there was this one. So, would I,
live nearby, am a professional gentleman, can host. David replied and after
the usual niceties was invited to this gentleman's home.

It was a typical hot weather style home in the suburbs and the man was very
pleasant. They sat and talk in the Livingroom and after introductions and
discussions of professional backgrounds the subject finally came around to
sexual needs and preferences. The man wished to have a very oral
relationship with no fucking. David was very agreeable to that since his
ass was still virgin and he had not made any decisions about changing
that. The two stood and removed their cloths and walked into the
bedroom. As they walked David glanced at the man's cock and saw that it was
a little small then the average cocks he had seen or the years. Which was
nice for sucking and he didn't have to worry about deep penetration to his
throat. It was a very nice room with a huge bed and sliding glass doors
that opened onto a screened in pool. Beyond the pool were flower beds and
stockade fencing that guaranteed privace.

David walk to the doors and looked at the pool and then turned to the
bed. The man was already laying on it and gestured to David by patting the
cover next to him. David sat and rolled to the man and lay on his back next
the side of the man as the man moved to kiss David. The only time David had
been kissed was by that man who lived in the museum House and that was very
brief, but here was a real kiss, tongue and all. David had never been
kissed like this. Yes, had kissed girls like this, but then he was the one
that was be aggressive and not this hard. Also, he had kissed his son for
years as a gesture on fatherly love on the cheek. This was a real open
mouth, lots of tongue, French kiss as they call them. David was surprised
as he felt his tongue react if it had a mind of its own. The two tongues
danced and rolled and heads twisted to get better advantage. Deep, hard and
long kissing was a new thing in his bisexual life.

After several moments of kissing the man's lips turned to David's chest and
licking at his nipples, first one and then the other, Sucking at his
nipples as the man cupped David's breasts. Little tiny nibbles and
bites. Then without missing an inch of skin the man's tongue slide down
across David's stomach and sucked up David's cock and gulped it into his
mouth. David just throw his head back and let the man have him. The man's
head bobbed up and down as he slid down the sheets and separated David's
legs and came to rest laying between them with his face buried in David's
crouch. The bobbing stopped and now the man was just sucking and consuming
David's cock deep into his throat. The man moaned and while his tongue
rolled David's cock around in his mouth. Then David's cock was out and the
man had David's testicle in his mouth and sucked it then the other ball was
inhaled. The man's tongue darted out of his mouth and started licking
David's crouch as the man lifted David's legs by sliding his hands under
David's knees and lifting them. David watched as his legs were pushed up
and to his chest which rolled his hips up. The man face was down and David
felt the man licking at his asshole. His tongue pushing to get in.  David's
mind raced and thought, "God this feels good". But then the legs were being
lowered, David mind was crying out, "No, wait, don't stop".

The man and David were again flat on the bed as the man settled down and
took David's cock into his mouth and just lay there sucking on it. Not
bobbing this time just sucking it in and licking it deep into his
throat. David could feel the swallowing of his Cock. The lips squeezed
around the shaft and the man just lie still and kept swallowing. Each time
David could feel the whole mouth and throat close around his cock as the
mouth swallowed and the tongue pulled his foreskin deeper into the man's
throat then the swallow would stop and the foreskin would slip back again.

For many minutes that was how they laid. David stretched out, legs spread,
with the man sucking and moaning. David had always taken a long time to
cum. Even as a teen it took time. Both Harold and the girls commented about
his longevity. The girls especially loved that David could just screw and
screw without Cuming.  They usual males that were around would finish
quickly and then be running off to tell about their accomplishments. David
neither stopped or went running off. He was slow gentle lover. He'd just
screw and screw, pumping in and out, his balls slapping against their
ass. Besides a decent cock he had a set of balls that hung down very low
and were sizable. It must have been those cutoff jeans the farmer had him
wearing with no underwear that made his balls so long. When running around
the farm his little balls just hung there and gravity made them into a
beautiful gift package. To swing back and forth slapping the girls with
each stroke.

David did cum and the man rolled over on his back and wiped his lips with
the back of his hand. "Damn, you are good" The man said. David replied," no
you're the one that is good". The man smiled and said, "no I meant good
tasting and for a longtime". David never did do anything but lie there and
have the man do his thing. As David dressed he thought, "this could be
great, just let this guy take me whenever he wanted". As David was leaving
He asked if the man would like to do it again and was told that the man
would look forward to any time David was horny and could just call. During
that winter David did call several times and the man would invite him over
to get nude and be sucked, and sucked, and sucked. This guy's name should
have been Hoover.

David spent the months staying warm and working at his home but every now
and then he would call and decide to go and get a blow job. Each visitation
was similar with getting nude as soon he entered the house and then setting
and drinking a beer while talking about life and the past. Then they would
retire to the bed and the sucking and moaning would begin.

From the dark came so many truths and it's hard to say, but what would
have happened if the farmer had not, who knows? The point is now what and
where is David going with this?