A LIFE CHANGING INTRODUCTION.
This story contains fictitious scenes and references of a sexual nature between an adult male and young boys.
No coercion or violence is depicted, this is a love story however should you find such material offensive or if it is illegal for you to access such material due to your age or legal restrictions in your country of residence, - please leave now.
Neither the author nor the publisher take responsibility for your continuation here.
All responses should be addressed to
All mail will be replied to whether good, bad or down right obscene!
I woke the following morning rather later than I'd planned but as I hadn't set an alarm and I wasn't in any hurry to get back, I judged that I'd needed the sleep more than I'd realised.
My head did feel so much more clear and focused. Last nights confusion had, - like pieces of a horrible jigsaw puzzle, - fitted themselves together in my sleep and my bad attitude had all but disappeared. – I felt good!
My mind, almost instantly turned to thoughts of Jamie.
Yes! I would email him just as soon as I got home!
I showered and dressed, - went down and paid the bill and jumped into my car.
I couldn't resist shouting out as I started the engine,- "GOOD MORNING WORLD!"
The sun was up and the sky was blue, - the trip was smooth and uneventful but for the first time I could remember, I was looking at the autumn colours highlighted through the crisp morning sky, - almost as if I'd never seen them before.
I pulled off the road at one point and whilst I'm not particularly religious, I looked up at the tree canopy to the sun filtering though the branches and gave thanks.
"Who ever or whatever you are? I don't deserve this happiness! ---- But I thank you anyway!!"
I fired up my laptop as soon as I got home. Whist it was booting up I made myself a coffee and a bacon sarnie.
There was the normal shit I had to deal with work-wise, - nothing from Jamie but one from Adam.
I hesitated for a moment before opening it up, scared that it might destroy my feeling of euphoria.
I shouldn't have worried.
`Hi John. Thankyou for taking us out last night.
No. – Thankyou for everything. I still don't know how you saw what you did, - I mean between Billy and I. Shit even I didn't fully realise it until you said!
I hope you are feeling better today. – You looked like crap last night and I so desperately wanted to give you a cuddle and tell you everything would be ok but I couldn't. – I know you understand what I'm trying to say.
We caught up with Jimbo after you left, - he was uncertain if you planned on keeping in touch with him or not. He hopes you do but I guess that's up to you but he really liked you if that means anything.
Look I've got to go to breakfast now.
Billy sends a big hug and a kiss and I send...my love, - my thanks and all sorts of other things I can't put into words.
I penned one straight back.
So good to get your email!
From the top, - I did what I did because it was right. I didn't want to see it but when I did, - I had to act. Let's put closure on it!
Yep! I was not at my finest last night and I got a bit pissed back at the hotel but it enabled me to think things through and this morning, - I feel so much better!
I didn't know if contacting Jamie was the right thing but he's really nice, ---- ok he's cute!
Yes. I will email him as soon as I've done with you!!!!!
You and Billy.
Take care of him. Please be happy together, - grow together, - love together.
I'm here for both of you always!
See you soon!
The next email was more difficult and I edited it soo many times just to make sure it said what I wanted it to say without it sounding too over the top!
It's John, - remember me, - the miserable bastard you had dinner with last night?
I'm sorry I wasn't at my best but it's good to know you understand the reasons behind my attitude.
Just to let you know that a bottle of red wine and a good nights sleep allowed me to put things into perspective and this morning I had the added bonus of receiving an email from Adam. – He's happy and contented and that's all I ever wanted for him.
I'm ready to move on now.
Sorry I was a pain in the arse last night. It would be nice to start again and if you're up for it, I could come down a week Friday and we could go out and get to know more about each other.
I just wanted to say. – Oh damn it!
I hope you'll say `yes'!"
Fifteen minutes later, my PC blinked at me to tell me I had new mail.
A reply from Jamie!
Oh wow! You contacted me so fast! I thought that it'd be two of three weeks at least and that was even if you ever did!
That is so nice and I can't begin to tell you how good you've made me feel! Almost like I'm wanted again!
Look I don't want to come across like I'm pushy but my so called `boy-friend' was a pig and a druggy, - I liked him and when he wasn't stoned, I could of loved him but his habit never gave me the chance.
A total `no-hoper'.
I've trod the line since then. No sex, - not that there was much of that anyway, just the normal day to day school stuff.
I got scared after Joe got expelled. I thought that I might too as so much stuff was found in my room, - needles tucked under my mattress, - an amount of coke behind the skirting board in my room for fucks sake!! I really thought I was dead meat and my parents would have gone crazy.
For different reasons, Adam and I were the same, - both struggling with daemons all by ourselves. I suppose that's why we became friends
The fact that I'm gay and realised it when I was about eleven, didn't bother me one bit. `Go with the flow' as my Mum would say to me, - oh and yes they know. I'm fortunate to have a very open relationship with them.
I hope this hasn't freaked you out too much and you're still reading, - I want to say that I really hope that you'll call me tonight, after eight o'clock?
You seem very nice. – caring and stuff!
Oh. Anytime you can make it down is ok but if I have to wait `til Friday week, - then so beit!!
Just one last thought. We have a house in Oxfordshire, - it's about twenty miles north of Reading and we could go there rather than you having to go to all the expense of staying in a hotel. It's very beautiful there and I'm sure you'll like it being someone who loves the countryside. Anyhow the choice is yours but if you fancy the idea, give me a few days notice so Janine can get prepared.
I studied, read and re-read his email and like a little child reading a wonderful fairy-tale!
I mailed him back.
Jamie, - thankyou!
I'd drive back down right now if I wasn't so tired!
You haven't freaked me out, - I didn't know that you'd had that bad a time of things but not that it would have made any difference as I'd made my mind up before hand to contact you, - if only to apologise for my attitude last night.
For the record, Adam was my first gay relationship and I fell very much in love with him and last evening it suddenly hit me that it was finished for ever and there were a few times I just wanted to get up from the table and run away.
I'm pleased I didn't.
I'll call you after eight o'clock tonight so make sure your battery is charged!
I don't know where this'll go but for my sins, I was really taken with you and would love to see you again and soon and Oxfordshire sounds good so long as your folks don't mind me invading their house.
I'll talk to you tonight but try not to get caught with your elicit phone!!
I looked at the clock and decided to have a lunchtime beer. My boys, - YES! My boys would be hard at work and I'd got eight hours to go before I could call Jamie.
Gods sake I'm fickle!
Sixteen hours ago, I was in a restaurant, a total mental mess not knowing how or what to do. – Now I'm almost bouncing off the ceiling!
Perhaps I could get religious. ----
Ok. Perhaps not but I'll never, ever put people down who have faith. Expressions such as, `one door slams in your face but another one opens to you' was starting to have some meaning.
Quietly I whispered "Thankyou, - who ever you are!"
I was surprisingly productive that afternoon and managed to submit three articles for publication.
Feeling pleased with myself, I had some supper and lit the fire in my office.
At a quarter to eight, I opened a bottle of my favourite red wine and relaxed back in my chair and once again pondered the events of the past two weeks.
I was shaken out of my thoughts when the phone rang.
"Hi John, it's Jamie."
"Oh hi Jamie! I was going to call you in about five minutes?"
"Gymnastics finished early tonight. One of the lads had a spill and has been taken to hospital with a suspected broken ankle so I thought I'd get in first. Hope it's not inconvenient?"
"God no! Do you want me to call you back to save you the expense of the call?"
"No it's fine. I'm sure my father can afford it but thanks for offering!"
"You didn't tell me you were a gymnast?"
"Oh yeah, I love it! Because I'm small for my age and I like to think, - very fit, I can move quickly and easily. I've been doing it for five years now, ever since coming to this school.
I've competed at national level and my dream is to trial for the 2012 Olympics but it probably is just that, - a dream!"
"We all have those! You must do a lot of training."
"Circuit training twice a week, weights twice a week and gymnastics proper twice a week. Sunday I collapse in a heap!"
"I've always thought about weight training but I think I'll stick to my twice-weekly swimming session! Just thinking about the amount you do makes me feel tired!"
"You gradually work up to it and after a bit it becomes like a drug you have to have. You can feel really quite unwell if you don't stick at it.
Hey! If you decide that we go up to Highmore, you can have a go with the weights! We have a gymnasium and then you can go for your swim if you want!"
"What? You've a gym and a pool?"
"Yes. Not massive you understand but more than good enough. I could get my personal trainer in if you want and he could do an assessment on you so if you enjoyed it and wanted to continue, you would already have a fitness plan to work to. Join a health club near to your home and hey! One fit John!"
"Why not?! You just said you always thought about giving it a go so why not have a go for free?"
"Well I love to have a go but I'd pay for the instructor?"
"It's ok, - don't worry about that! He's contracted by my father, - sort of like a fixed annual amount. So are you up for it?"
"Damn! I've dug a big hole for myself, haven't I! Oh go on then!"
"So does that mean we'll go to Highmore?"
"So long as your folks don't mind?"
"They're almost never there. The family home is in Scotland. My father bought `Highmore' when his offices were in London but when he sold that part of his business interests it became just some place I could escape to during half term holidays and stuff. I love it there!"
"Ok. That would be nice but on one condition. – You tell them that I'm going to be there with you.
I don't need any misunderstandings."
"That's no problem John. I've told you already that they know I'm gay. The fact that I'm bringing a friend who's older than me will be fine with them. – At least you won't be the sort of person that'll trash the place! If it makes you feel happier about it, - I'll call them and tell them."
"That would be good, - thanks! So when shall we do it?"
"When's good for you? You were talking of a couple of weeks but honestly, I could do any weekend."
"Yep. No problem! I'll have to arrange a weekend pass but because I'm a senior, I don't have to say who I'm going with, - just the address where I'm going and as it's one of our places, - nothing will be said."
"One of your places?"
"Yeah. --- Look I'll explain more when I see you and then you'll understand.
My battery is farting at me and I don't want to lose you. – I'd better sign off John."
"Don't want to lose you either! – Not now! Go on. I'll email you later and hey, --- thanks!"
"Just, -- thanks Jamie!"
With that the line went dead. Either Jamies phone had died or he'd been sussed out but which ever way it was, - there was nothing I could do about it.
Also I suddenly felt very tired. Perhaps the stress of the last twenty-four hours was starting to take it's toll.
I refilled my wine glass and capped the remainder for tomorrow.
I'm an addict for music.
It can pull me up or put me down depending on my mood.
I was feeling reflective so perhaps my choice wasn't the best in the world.
A piece on `You Tube' did it for me.
A young lad with the most fantastic voice.
A very searching song called `Tell Me Why?'
I cried myself to sleep, - not moving from my office chair for the remainder of the night.
To listen to the song. Please do a `Google' search for `the 10 year old boy very in a fantastic way sings!
Then go to the site indicated as forumeter.com
Close your eyes, turn up the volume and let it all out.