Play Maker
The Queen of Gay Romance”


If you are dumb enough to believe this story is true, please stop, shut off your computer and then go to the nearest mirror to repeatedly slap yourself back into reality. You'll thank yourself afterward, I assure you.

IF you are below the age of 18, please don't read the stories on here. Your presence jeopardizes those of us who do so legally.

Notes From Retta:

This story is written mostly as a retro piece. I intentionally made sure some prices were lower and I made sure the older stars were used in the piece. You need to realize this was written in the era of Bush I (around 1991). I did it from memory, so sue me if it's not completely accurate.

Play Maker


Chapter Twenty Nine:

The plane parked and we got the door opened. We got the Suburban loaded and I said, “Ok, Chris, take the Suburban for you guys. Ren, Andy, and I will get a ride downtown.”

You sure?”

Yeah, I'll call Jan. She'll come and get us.”

Ok, but I don't like leaving you guys out here.”

“We're in the hangar and have the office over there. I can make calls while we're waiting.”

I pulled out my phone and dialed Jan's number. “Hello?”

Hey, would you pick us up at the airport?”

Sure, what about the Suburban?”

Chris's family needs it tonight. They rode back with us with a bunch of stuff.”

Tell them to call his dad. I gave him the keys to the house he wanted.”

Ok, I'll do that.”

Who do you have with you?”

Ren, Andy, and me. That's all who are riding downtown.”

How much stuff?”

Andy's camera and a light bar, that's it.”

Ok, I'll bring a Town Car. Dolly wanted to know when you wanted to eat.”

It'll have to be light. I've done commercials and ate at Burger King.”

You've got a ton of Nestle's which was delivered. Also, Pepsi sent you enough to fill the hallway.”


I don't know, but I'm taking a bunch home with me. Do you mind?”

Heck no, if I'd known, I would've told the guys to take a bunch home with them.”

There's tomorrow hon.”

IS Dolly coming out with you?”

No, why?”

I was thinking about having her drive a vehicle out here and leaving it.”

How about a Suburban. We've got three. One could be kept out there.”

Ok, we'll do that...if she doesn't mind.”

I'll tell her. I do need to speak with you some time.”

I already know.”

You know what?”

When you tell me, I'll tell you I knew.”

I'm not even sure yet.”

Well, Chris and I were told today. We hadn't narrowed it down, but I pretty much know.”

I can't believe you know and I'm not even sure!”

We'll talk when you get here.”


She hung up and I turned to Chris, “You're supposed to call your dad. He got the keys to one of the houses you looked at. I think he wants to come out and take you guys there.”

Ok, I'll call now.”

I dialed Grant. “Hello?”

Hey, I need to tell you what I've done, so hang on. Ok?”


I traded the cable company to the phone company. In return, I got eight hundred million worth of towers.”



That's like a hundred and sixty thousand towers!”


Ok, so tell me what you're doing with them.”

Ok, first of all, the investment group has the western edge of Kansas. I've put towers up along the interstate corridors there.”


Then, I've put a bunch of towers up in Australia that we'd need.”

Great, but that's hardly touching them.”

Well, after that, I spoke with him and he told me if I put the rest into a private corporation, he's not going to check to see if I own it.”


Yeah, so that's a big feather in my cap.”

I'd say!”

Well, here's what I got because as you know, I'm real partial to Brasil.”

I know that.”

He gave me Brasil, but he also gave me South America. So, I put towers there in every major metro area.”

Oh man.”

That's not all because it gets more insane.”

Ok, tell me.”

I made a joke about having two continents and he said I might as well take Africa. So, I did.”

Oh my God!”

Yeah, so we put towers there and what got this started is on the plane, I spoke about the cell towers to Andy and Ren. Ren wanted Spain, so I'm lending him enough towers to cover Spain.”

Oh man, he's going to be happy when all that starts rolling in.”

Yeah, but I got Andy most of Iowa from I-80 north. It's mostly rural, but it's good for him because it's an investment.”

Ok, so did you lend him towers?”


Good, that can come back as an investment.”

For Chris, as you know, he's not invested into Japan yet, so we covered it with towers, but then I asked about Asia. He got most of all those including parts of China and India.”

Oh man, did you cover them for him?”

Yeah, but I had a whole lot of towers left, so I'm having them cover what else I can cover in Russia, China, and Europe. He said he's going to work on it, but it looks like I'm doing real good there.”

You did great kid.”

Just wait because that's where that ended, but I sorta did a hat trick on him.”

What was that?”

Tomorrow, the head of NBC and I are going to talk. I told the guy I'd invest a billion into the company and he told me I could get quite a bit of their stock with that.”

Ummm, that's a lot of money Jake.”

Just listen, it gets better. What I had planned to invest was the money I was going to make from the cable company. Needless to say, I traded that for all those towers.”

Do you have enough?”

Yeah, but just listen because it's rather funny.”

Ok, I'll shut up.”

Well, someone told me a billion would get about a third of the network. I don't know, because I'm not up on all that, but being broke now, I knew I couldn't swing it. HOWEVER, I told John about it and told him I'd go in halves with him if he'd invest a billion in with me on it. So...”

Oh my God! You didn't!”

Yeah, he took it hook, line, and sinker, so I've got half of whatever a billion gets me in the negotiation tomorrow and he even went on to tell me to get as much as I could get and he'd go halves. So, if I spend that other half a billion I've got, I can do more, but he's going to have to do a billion and a half.”

You're crazy!”

Hey, it worked, so I'm smiling!”

He laughed, “I'm just stunned. I can't believe he took it!”

We could end up with forty percent of the company and that means I'd have twenty and he'd have twenty and I only spent half a billion.”

Oh man, you're batting a thousand.”

Yeah, now all we have to worry about is getting store fronts for the cell company, but he said he'd work on that with us. I think he can't believe the luck, but I'll tell you I sure can't believe it. It'll be unreal in a couple of years when all that money starts rolling, what I want to ask you is this...when the money starts rolling in, do you want to start going into wherever we can and start putting in for cable companies?”

When all the money starts rolling in?”


Sure, but we've got to make sure the area has good electricals. I don't want to open a cable company in a town that doesn't have electricity.”

I think Australia and all over Kansas and Colorado has electricity.”

We'll have to check Australia. I don't know much about it except they've got a lot of big cities along the coast.”

Oh, by the way, I told them to put towers along the main highways going through the interior. It'd be like running them along our interstates.”

That's good, it might not make a lot of money, but it'd certainly tie all of them in together.”

I figure the repeaters would be in place for us to go into the smaller towns when it's time to fill in.”

Excellent plan. I'm glad you did it.”

Well, that's what I know.”

Where are you at?”

At the airport. We're waiting on a ride since Chris' family moved a bunch of stuff out here. He's taking the Suburban tonight, so Jan's coming to pick us up. By the way, she's starting to suspect about what we talked about.”


Yeah, I think it's cool.”

Ok, I'll get off here.”

Tell Mama and Papa O that I'm going to be on the Today show in the morning so they can watch me.”

I'll do that. Good luck on the interview. How many commercials did you get filmed?”

Nine altogether. What I did was made the Nestle and a GM at the stadium. Then we did a Suburban at Hickman's IGA. While I was there, I found the pumpkin I'm going to throw in Dallas. Then, we went up to Burger King and did three. After that, I got a Pizza and 2 liter from Pizza Hut and went over to my house. I did a Pepsi there and then a Pizza Hut. While there, I went upstairs and did a Stein commercial.”

You were busy!”

That Stein commercial is really good. Mrs Watson watched them all and thought it was the best out of all of them.”

Good, you're on a roll.”

Tomorrow is busy. On Thursday, I need to have a suit there because I need to represent us at a funeral visitation back home.”

Who died?”

It's a kid. I did a commercial with the family at Burger King before I found out they were there from making funeral arrangements for their son.”

What's their names?”


Oh man, which boy?”

The oldest, Ben died. He watched us on television and his heart failed later.”

Oh jeez, they're customers of mine. I'm glad you told me.”

I wouldn't have known, but we did two commercials there and I saw the other little boy over there all excited about seeing me. I went over and before you would know it, I had them in a commercial. Then, I got them food for a year from BK and shook hands with Mr Turlock. That's when I found out.

By the way, I've invited them to sit on the sidelines with us during the game.”


They're going to be in a commercial for Stein with me in Michigan on Friday.”

Michigan! Why?”

I'm doing a Stein Happy Holidays and needed snow. Mr Turlock told me they're expecting a lot of snow, so I called Pete and he's getting the team up there so we can film.”

Don't get snowed in. We need you.”

I won't. But while I'm up there, we're going to film another Pizza Hut with Adam and me in the front yard of the house. We're going to make a snow man and will probably have a snow mom and a snow kid with a Pizza Hut snow delivery guy with the box in his stick arms.”

Don't say any more, knowing they just lost their son and seeing you doing that for them to help get their minds off it is just giving me lodes of goosebumps.”

Grant, I'll tell you until that moment when I spoke with them, I had no idea the way we touch people's lives. Here they were telling me how Benny had cheered for us because he knew we were from Moberly and how we made his last few moments happy was amazing. By the end of that conversation, I was blubbering.”

I'm crying hearing you tell me. I'd be honored to have them sit with our team.”

I'm going to shower them with a lot of merchandise. And, by the way, I've gotten them jobs.”


Because of the time he'd taken off from work, the company he worked for laid him off. She's a bookkeeper, and had already quit in order to be a full time caregiver. I felt all that when I touched him, so I offered them jobs out here at the distributorship. Now, do you want to know what's just amazing?”

What's that?”

I saw everything as I told you, but Adam is going to grow up to be a firefighter here in Akron. What's uncanny is they lived across the street sorta from Chris' family. Now, they're going to be working with the Powers, and from the friendship which develops between the two families...especially between Adam and Stephanie, they end up getting married and having some kids.”

Oh man, it's a small world, isn't it?”

Yeah, now that's not why I offered him the job, but that's the result of that. Isn't that neat?”

Yeah, I want you to give them season passes on behalf of the team.”

I'm going to give the the VIP season passes so they're more in contact with the team. If possible, I would like for Adam to become our honorary team mascot.”

Like a littlest Angel?”


Cool, I like that idea.”

I'm thinking about starting a thing like that for kids and families of sick kids. Had I known, I would've done more for Benny, but I guess we gave him a joyous moment without realizing it.”

Jake, I'm really proud of you for thinking of it. I'll push for it all the way with the team.”

We've got the jets, so we can use them to get them to our games. I'll treat them like royalty and not feel bad one moment for it.”

I know, it sounds great. Well, I'll get off here. You made me cry and proud all at the same time, so thanks.”

Thanks Grant, I love ya dude.”

I love you too.”

I hung up and Mama P was standing there with tears in her eyes. She hugged me and said, “Hon, I'm sorry I eavesdropped, but I'm glad I did. I'd be proud to help with all that.”

Good, it's going to be our team charity. Grant's going to push it with the guys, so I think we'll make it real good for them.”

I wanted to come over and tell you privately I'm thankful for all you're doing for us and Chris.”

Awww heck, you're like a mom to me. You know I'll be over there scarfing food just as fast as we can get you to cooking. Ren already likes you guys but when he tastes your cooking, he's going to be bowled over.”

Don't tell him I said this, but he ate a big bowl of Stew while you were gone. I think he already knows he likes my food.”

Jeez, I wish I'd known! I would'a been sittin' beside him.”

You sure that's what you saw about Stephanie?”

Yeah, she and Adam. Your family and the Turlock's are going to be close so you'll have gained him as a son long before they get serious about each other. What really kicks it off is a prom. He asks her and that's when they realize what they've got under their noses. They're smart enough not to ignore it.”

Good, what about Chris?”

I'm going to have to read him again. Everything I had with him went up in smoke.”

How's that?”

Jared was in Robbie, so that's why we were together. Then Jared got told he was needed elsewhere more and that put Robbie back in Robbie. It ended up Robbie cheating with Kit, so that ended things for us guys.

When I spoke with Jared this morning, he said he was going to be reborn to someone close to us and it was a surprise. I had to think on it, but I'm realizing it's Jan.”

Who's she?”

She's our team manager. Well, she's our office manager, team manager, and my sanity right now. She's acting in so many roles, it's just like she's my arms because she can't be called my right hand.”

She sounds special.”

She's a great lady. She lost her husband, but that's supposed to not be known by us.”

How'd that go?”

The former owner and her husband were into the mob for money. They sort of lost all they had and the mob took them to my penthouse and killed them.”


Yeah, so I found the bodies and we sorta gave them back to the mafia with me telling them to stay the hell out of the team. They're going to do something with the bodies on Sunday when everyone's in Dallas...I'm not sure what, but I'm told it's going to be rather obvious they're dead and there's no way they're going to be able to detect how long they've been dead or all that.”

Oh dear, that's scary.”

I've upped security real super strong. After this morning with Robbie getting here and getting into my office with a gun, it was obvious we needed security improvements. I should've paid more mind when two dead bodies end up in my apartment, but hey, I didn't. Now I am being real super strong about it, so I'm sure we're safe.”

She shook her head, “Hon, I sure didn't think this would come along with the fame you boys have.”

It's a part of out with the old and in with the new.”

She hugged me and I said, “Papa P is just pulling up.”

Good, I've missed him today.”

The house you guys have is beautiful. I'm seeing you seeing it for the first time now. I think you're going to love it.”

Is it nice?”

Way bigger than what you've got now. You and papa P can whoop it up and make all sorts of noise on your side of the house and the kids won't know a thing.”

She pulled back from me, “You! You can be so embarrassing.”

Hey, you just name that new bundle of joy Jake and I'll be happy.”


About two years.”

Don't tell me that! I'm done having kids!”

Well, this one is picking you. I've already gotten told what he's going to be like and man, the kid is way cool.”

You take the fun out of it. I was doing a countdown until I had our nest empty.”

I'll tell you now, your nest is never empty.”

Shhhh, I've got to have a dream it's going to be.”

You're the type of mom everyone wants to be around. Your kids are well enough adjusted they cling onto strays and bring them home. It's a compliment to you guys.”

Don't ever say you're a stray again!”

I didn't mean it in a bad way, but it's true. Your kids befriend those who wouldn't normally have friends.”

She gave me a look and said, “I can't believe you wouldn't have had friends.”

“I'm a geek, let's face it. If Chris hadn't latched onto me, I'd be in some library reading books and filling my brain with facts and stuff. He brought me out of it and I'm thankful.”

Well, you've been more than a source of joy. Yeah, you boys have been handfuls, but I've enjoyed every minute of it.”

The priest back home probably is a bit more thankful. I guess we'll have to get someone with really onry kids to buy you guy's house.”

She laughed, “I think it's a conspiracy you two had on that poor man. He's really nice!”

I'm sure he is, but he just didn't look right unless he had gray hair. We just made it our goal to give them to him.”

She chuckled, “The day you boys came in all mad because you'd climbed that building to get to the bell tower only to find speakers, was about my undoing. Then you tell me you went down and surprised that priest and told him to get bells up there!”

Well, why have a bell tower if you're not going to have bells in it. That's just not right.”

What's not right is climbing up the outside of a building that far to find those things out!”

We had those Indiana Jones outfits, we had to try them out.”

You kids could've gotten hurt.”

Nah, I let him climb up first to see if it would work. If he fell, I wouldn't have tried.”


Hey, if he fell, he was going to push away with his feet and try hitting the bushes. It sounded cool!”

Papa P came over, “There you are hugging my wife again. If you weren't gay, I'd say you to had a thing going!”

She turned, “Hon, do you remember when he and Chris climbed the Cathedral?”


Well, I just found out Chris did it first. I also just found out their little plan was to have Chris push away and land in the bushes should he fall!”

He laughed, “Probably would've worked.”

You're no help!”

Hon, they're boys. They do those things.”

Well, he just told me we're going to have another in two years. You just be prepared because this one we're going to raise right!”

He laughed, “Thanks Jake, you know that's not happening now because she'll never give me any again. You know birth control better than anything in this world.”

Awww, now I sorta helped there. I told her about your house and you and she getting all noisy as much as you'd like since the kid's bedrooms are on the other side. I thought you'd appreciate it.”

He smirked, “All the kids will hear now is the sound of running taking cold showers!”

I laughed, “If you want to know the perfect birth control, I can use it on you guys. I'll just read Chris and about the time he's set to meet Miss Right, I'll take him away from that and you guys will never get rid of him. That's the best I can do.”

She rolled her eyes, “Don't you dare!”

Papa P came over, “Jake, when he turns eighteen, all his stuff is getting moved to your place. I bet you find a way for him to meet her real real fast.”

Oh, in that case, I need to get to work on seeing that never happens.”

They laughed, and he said, “I thought you'd see it our way!” He came over and hugged me, “No, I need to thank you. The job's going to be great and the house is beautiful.”

I need to tell you I've got you two employees coming.”


The Turlock's. They live sorta across and down the street from you guys. He's going to drive a truck for you and she's going to be a bookkeeper.”

I know them. They're good people. Why are they coming to Akron?”

She put her hand on his chest, “Hon, one of their boys died.”


The oldest.”

Oh Lord! Are they alright?”

Yeah, it was a congenital birth defect with his heart. They knew about it and were told he'd never live past his first year, but they were lucky and Blessed to have them for as long as they did.”

When's his funeral?”

Wednesday is the visitation and Thursday is the funeral.”

I'll send an arrangement. If you don't mind, I'll want to be back there so I can pay my respects.”

Good. I'm going to be there also. Well, Ren and I will be.”

Who's Ren?”

Mama P said, “Hon, he's the guy over there. He's Jake's keeper...because if Jake doesn't keep him, we're throwing away Jake and keeping him.”

I take it you've met him?”

Yeah, he's a heckuva guy...super sweet and charm's Steph's socks off. He's so good she wants Jake to pick her guys for her. Little does she know he's already done it.”


The Turlock's other son.”

They're good people hon. If they're coming to work for me, I'm sure we'll be seeing a lot of them.”

Did you see any houses you think would be suitable for them?”

He turned, “You own a whole subdivision out there. There are about twelve houses in there and from what I guess, you've got ten of them empty.”


It's beautiful. I'd call all of them mini mansions, but each one of them is way better than back home. I went through all of them and took the one we took because of the larger garage. I figure with Chris' cars and ours, we're going to need it.”

Mama P asked, “Chris has cars?”

Yeah, his Camaro and now his Lamborghini.”


Jake gave him a Lamborghini someone didn't want. It's an amazing car.”

Oh dear, isn't that one on his wall back home?”


She turned, “Jake you shouldn't have. That car is too expensive.”

Hey, it came with the team. I tried driving it but I didn't care for it. I know he loves them, so I gave it to him. I hear Papa P loves it.”

She gave an amused smile, “Really?”

Hon, that car is just amazing. We're going to go out in it and you're going to want one. I'll tell you now that thing is pure power.”

I said, “It is that, but you guys are welcome to come down to the stadium and pick yourselves out one. I've got a bunch of them.”

He said, “No, the distributorship is supplying mine. If she wants one, I'll come down there to get her one, but we've got ours back home.”

Ok, but just remember I offered. By the way, you guys need to know how it's going to go with the team. We're representing most of the car manufacturers. I've negotiated into the contracts the guys get the cars they want and as many as they want. What that means is if someone wants one, we tell the guy and he gets it for us.

I do it with my GM contract, and whoever else has the other contracts does it for their make.”

So we get new cars whenever we want?”



Papa P smiled, “She'll probably be hitting you up for a new one. I know she's had her eyes on a new 'Vette...especially since you had yours.”

Well, we've got two of them down at the lot she's welcome to have her pick. So you guys just go on down.”

He nodded. We were interrupted by Chris yelling, “Come on guys, I've got to unload all this!”

I yelled back. “Hold your horses, your dad's got to meet Ren yet.”

Stephanie heard that and brought Ren over holding his hand, “Dad, this is Ren. He's Jake's boyfriend.”

Ren shook Papa P's hand and smiled. “It's good to meet you. I've been charmed to meet your wonderful family.”

I've heard a lot of good things about you.”

Ren smiled, “Your family represents you well, so I know you're a nice man.”

Papa P smiled, “You're welcome to our home whenever you wish to come.”

I said, “I have a feeling we're going to be out there looking at those houses. I'll let the Turlock's know so they can come pick theirs, but it might save Steph footsteps if we put them in the one next door.”

Papa P chuckled, “That kid better be running to our house...a lot!”

Dad, the oldest one died!”

I heard that honey. We need to go back and pay our respects to him.”

Why'd he die?”

He had a problem with his heart.”

I knelt down and hugged her. “Honey, he had a problem with his heart. The Lord made him that way so he'd receive extra special love from his mom and dad. You and me don't have that problem because your parents love us already. His parents loved him enough too, but the problem with his heart didn't go away. Now he's up in Heaven with the Angels.”

What about Adam? Does he have that problem?”

No, but I'm sure he's going to miss his brother a lot. Wouldn't you?”


Well, he's going to need friends when he moves out here, so why don't you be his friend and I'll help you do that.”


Your mom and I were talking about making team mascots and having him possibly wearing an angel costume. You could wear one too and be a mascot for us too. That way, he's not scared to do it alone.”

Will I still get to be in commercials?”

Yeah, probably more of them by doing that.”

Good. I want to be in commercials.”

I hugged her and then stood up. Papa P gave me a look like he'd missed a whole lot. Mama P said, “Hon, Jake filmed commercials today. She found out Chris is going to be in them also, so she wants to be in some.”

Oh, what's Chris going to be in?”

McDonald's, Coca Cola, and several others. I think we've got him the M&M/Mars account.”

His eyes widened, “Man!”

It's good money.”

I'd say!”

He's locked into fifteen year contracts with them at fifteen million a year. He gets bonuses too, so he's going to be doing good.”

He shook his head and said, “Man, that's forty five million a year!”

Mama P said, “Hon, if you heard what all Jake's done for him beside that, you'd be laying passed out on the ground. Let's just say Chris is going to be very wealthy, but that one there will shock you with the way he deals in business.”


He's wealthy because he has other people buying him things. I heard him do a billion dollar deal on the phone and was shocked when I realized he'd cut himself in for half and the other guy was happy to do it.”

Papa P smiled, “I know there's a story here.”

Yeah, but you better let her drive and have you be told. IF she tells it while you're driving, you'll probably wreck.”

His eyebrows raised, “Chris, wait a minute because I'm going to hear this one!”

Dad, I was there. I've heard a lot of things in my life but that one even took me for a loop!”

Papa P smiled, “Jake, you did yourself good on this one. What was it?”

Well, I got this cable company in the assets of the savings and loan.”


Well, I was planning on selling it and buying a billion worth of NBC tomorrow. I probably wouldn't have gotten that much for it, but the way it went was I called the phone company about cell phone towers.

As you know, I got Chris the Japan rights.”

Yeah, but he's not invested in it yet.”

Right, but Ren wanted Spain and Andy wanted some, so I called.”

Who's Andy?”

He's the guy over there. He shoots my commercials.”


I'm going to be around him for the next fifteen years, so I figured I'd help him out financially.”

Good plan.”

Well, I called and got Ren his rights to Spain and then I got Andy most of Iowa above the I-80 line. It's rural, but there's population, so he'll do good.

While I was on the phone, I decided to offer the cable company to John to see if he wanted it and we agreed to trade it for eight hundred million worth of cell phone towers.

Needless to say, that many covers a lot of territory. So, I agreed to put them on Australia and then decided to get Brasil for myself. He told me I could have all of South America, so I took it. Then I laughed and said I had two continents and he offered me Africa. I took it and found out I still had a whole lot of towers left.

Needless to say, I lent Ren some to cover Spain and lent Andy some to cover his territory and then lent some to cover Chris'. I asked about more of Asia for Chris and got most of the 'nams, Koreas, Laos, Cambodia, Malaysia, Singapore, Hong Kong and some of China, and some of India for him. Now all of them have towers, so that's good.”

You did all this in one go?!”

Yeah, but I still had a lot of towers left, so they're going to cover as much of the Iran, Iraq, Saudi, and on up through Turkey and Europe with the things. So, it's a lot of territory covered for me.”

Oh man. So tell me how this went that everyone's so shocked.”

Well, needless to say, I spent my money I had planned to spend for NBC tomorrow. On a whim, I asked the guy if he wanted to go in halves with me. I told him what I was getting and told him he'd need to invest a billion too. So, I'll use his billion and will give him half of what I get with it. The other half is finder's fee.”

He gave me a look like he was choking and started laughing. “You did what!”

Yeah, so I get and he gets and we're both happy. But, I've still got half a billion, so I might throw that into the pot and get more. If I do, I'll have him throw in another half and that way we're even.”

Jake! I can't believe you did that!” he said laughing.

Hey, the guy's happy, so what he doesn't know don't hurt him. Besides, it helps us both out.”

And he went for it?”

Yeah, but I get off the phone and I look over at Chris and he's just like got his mouth open like he's begging for pizza. Andy was looking like he'd won the lottery and ma was over there stunned. Heck if they'd gotten the chance, they would'a done it.”

He chuckled, “Oh man, that's gotta be the deal of the century!”

I'm happy.”

I bet! Oh jeez kid, you make yourself a billionaire in ways people just don't imagine.”

Well, it was rather easy. I think I did pretty well for everyone.”

Yeah, I'd say you did! Do you realize you're going to be found out and when you are, that guy's going to be upset?”

Nah, he's happy he's got his phone service around the world in one phone call. I imagine I'm making him that much just off the towers.”

I imagine he is, but you're making yourself a lot of money too.”

Mama P said, “You're forgetting he's making Chris that wealthy also.”

He is, well, we'll just have to get used to Chris having money.”

Chris smiled, “I'll be giving a lot to you guys. You know that.”

I know, but just the same, I'm glad Jake's doing it for you.”

I said, “He'd do it for me if the situation were reversed, so we're in it together.”

I put my hand in Ren's and suddenly got a flash. I turned to Ren and asked, “Your youngest sister Mimi, you need to introduce her to Chris.”

Mimi? She's too...ummm....”

She's perfect for Chris. He's going to love her.”


Yeah, I just saw them together.”

Chris' eyes lit up, “Really?”

Yeah, she's beautiful. She's quiet, but she's like Ren. When she smiles, her smile fills a room.”

When can I meet her?”

I turned to Ren, “Would you call them and see if they'd like to come over?”


Because I've got houses. If they need a place to stay, we've got money and houses, so they'd be fine here.”

Sure, but I feel like I'm imposing.”

Hon, it's not imposing. Here, use my phone and call. If they want, I'll send the middle jet for them. They can see everything here and if they feel uncomfortable seeing you perform, then I'll keep them entertained in Dallas.”

Are you sure?”

Yeah, I know they don't know as much English, but I could help them.”

Ok, but let's go so I can find the country code.”

Sure, but let me make a call and I'll find out where Jan is. Besides, I can get the country code no problem. Look it up here on my phone.”

I punched it in and got to the section of the phone which gave it. I pressed the button and it brought up the code onto the screen. I gave him the phone and he smiled, then began dialing. Soon, he said, “Mama?”

He began speaking rapidly in Spanish and I understood every word. He told his mom he'd met the man of his dreams and that I was very wealthy. He told her I had a house for them and wanted them to come live in it. A bit of an argument arose and finally he said, “But I love you and want you near me. IF I'm going to be living here, I want to have you close!” Their conversation went on with him trying to convince her and finally, I said, “Papi?”

He looked at me and I held out my hand. He gave it to me and I got on the phone. “Senorita diSilva, this is Jake Martin.”

Oh, you sound so young!”

I am, but I've made a place for him and I've made a place for you and your family. It's no imposition and it's my sincerest wish to have you and your daughters to come enjoy the fruits of our wealth and lives.”

Are you sure?”

The house I have for you and them is very beautiful. It's right next to ours and is in an exclusive neighborhood with people who will all love you and make you feel welcome.”

What do you want in return?”

It's my hope I will be accepted as your son's other. That we may grow to know each other to where you love me and accept me into your family. That's all I wish.”

You don't want us for servants?”

No! Heaven's no, if you want servants, I'll arrange for them, but I don't need any. I take after myself and I trust Ren will take after himself too. I realize he's got a lot of things, but we'll have that situated into our house in our own manner.”

You're not having him there for a pet are you?”

No! He's going to be famous here. He's going into my sport.”

What sport?”

I own a football team. American football.”

Oh! I've seen that on television.”

Well, he's going to be on the team with me. He's really good and they think he has great promise. It's much safer than fighting the bulls and he's wonderful with it.

I would like you to come and be our guests. IF you don't like it, then you can return home and I'll see you're very well situated there so he's completely unworried about your welfare.”

I'd like to meet you.”

Ok, I have a jet. I'll send it for you and have it there to pick you and your daughters up and bring them here. You can see everything we have and you can be assured all will be well.”

Are you sure?”

I'm absolutely sure. Don't pack everything yet, I want you to be sure and have time to make your decision.”

You speak our language very well.”

I speak many languages very well. It's a natural gift of mine as well as many other insights.”


Yes, you have some of what I have.”

I do?”

You've seen your mother in a picture frame. You spoke with her and got an answer. That is how you knew all would be well after you lost your husband.”

You know about that?! I was alone in the room!”

I saw it. I see your past, present, and future through touch. I touched Ren and saw your youngest happily married with my best friend Chris. I also see Mattilda with a wonderful man she meets over here and I see Bernadette with a man she meets on our plane on the way over here. He is our pilot. They smile a lot at each other and on the way off the plane, he asks if he could show her the city. You just watch and you'll see it's quite true. I won't say anything to anyone here and you'll have my confidence because Renaldo will be with me the entire time. In fact, I'll tell someone else to call the plane and send them for you so you're assured I don't even speak with them.”

You own your own plane?”

I own three of them. I own a lot of things. You'll be amazed.”

Really? But you're so young?!”

Yes ma'am, I am, but my parents are dead. My grandmother invested very well and then she too died. I've invested and I've made Ren very wealthy in his own right so if he doesn't like me, then he doesn't have to stay. It's my hope he'll grow to love me as I will him.”

Oh, but he will!”

Not off my money, but for my heart. It's to be as you had with his father.”

You saw my Juan Carlo?!”

Yes ma'am, a very handsome man. Well, he was nearly identical to Renaldo in looks at this age, but he matured into a very handsome man in his own right.”

“Oh dear! You did see him!”

He was left handed and had different color eyes than Renaldo. Ren got your eyes. He loved you greatly.”

I didn't tell her I saw the love life they shared, but I also saw Juan's unfaithfulness. What's strange is he was unfaithful, but he loved her more than life....go figure that out.

And I loved him the same.”

Now, that was wrong. She loved him greatly, but she was never unfaithful. If I had to say it, she loved him more.

I will send a plane. Would you pack enough for about a week? IF you need anything, we will shop for you here.”

Oh dear, I need to pack. I'll tell my daughters. Won't they be surprised!”

Please keep the secret about Bernadette quiet, it's your way of knowing I can see it.”

I will. I somehow know you can see this.”

I'll put you back on with Renaldo. He can call you back to tell you how long it will take for the plane to arrive. That way, you're not waiting needlessly.”


I handed the phone back to Ren and turned to Mama and Papa P. Mama P said, “You spoke fluently. Your dialect wasn't learned at our high school. How did you learn that?”

It's from within. The nearest I can tell you is when I read people, their language comes through and gets absorbed into my subconscious.

What's strange is I know I can speak in over a hundred different languages if needed. It would be such a thing I could go into a tribe in the farthest traces of the globe and I'd be able to speak their language instantly to the point I'd not be killed.”

She frowned and shook her head. “Your gifts amaze me.”

It's going to totally astound the phone company when I begin doing commercials. I'll have to label each and tell them where it's to go in order for them to advertise there. Isn't that weird?”

What's weird is they'll most likely have those phones there.”

They will. I won't advertise where we're not going to have phones. But what's going to amaze and astound is some of which is going to be here in our own country.”


You're going to see me advertising and using some wordage which is going to appeal to Mennonites and Amish which finds it's way to the Elders of their communities.

They're going to go to those passages in the Bible and see it is written to where they accept it. They'll still spurn television, but cell phones will be accepted. Now, with no electricity, you tell me how they're going to charge the things, because not even I can tell you that!”

She smiled, “You see that?”

Yeah, they see it being used for emergencies. The eldest member of the Amish, in fact, will hear the advertisement and will be looking up the passage in the Bible and will have found it when he gets the alarm one of their graineries is on fire. He'll see it would've been saved if they'd had faster response from the fire department and that's when he'll see the fire department using a cell phone. He'll decide they need one and he'll allow cell towers to be placed on their land.”


Ren got off the phone and said, “You've impressed my mother very much. Her reservations are now gone.”

You let me know if they need servants. I promised her we'd get them for her if she needs them.”

He smiled, “She thought you wanted us over here to be servants.”

I know. Heck, that won't happen, but I will give you a secret. She's going to see me liking Taco Bell and she's going to be cooking up authentic Spanish dishes for me just to keep me away from it.”

Why didn't you tell me you saw things?”

Papa P sort of coughed, “We'll leave you boys for tonight.”

I gave them hugs as did Ren. They left and Chris smiled. “You should've told him.”

They left and I turned to Ren. “I didn't want to scare you. You've never known anything or anyone like me and what I can do. It would've scared you.”

You should've told me.”

I'm sorry.”

He smiled and stepped into a hug, “I forgive you. You used it to show my mom all will be well.”

She's seen things herself. I used the one where I knew no one was around to demonstrate to her I saw it.”

I know she's seen things. She told me to be careful before the first time I got hurt.”

It wasn't your fault. You saw a ring.”

I did! But, later when I went back to that spot, it wasn't there. I thought I'd imagined it.”

You saw it. I saw it too. It distracted you. The second time, you tripped on the cape going backwards. You promised your mom and sisters you'd not do it anymore and it's saddened you.”

It did. I'm happy now. I like hugging you.”

I like hugging you too. Your smell is spicy.

He chuckled, “Yours is sweet.”

Together, we're salsa.”

He chuckled, “You wait because my mother's salsa is the best.”

I imagine, but you wait until we've had salsa in Houston. You won't be there, but your mom is going to have our plane full of so many fruits and vegetables she gets at that open air market, we're going to be drowning in the salsa she makes, but what's funny is she's not going to get it right until I tell her mangos are what made it so different.”

Mangos in salsa?!”

Yes, there's a style of salsa which has pineapple, burning red hot chilis, and sweet onions. It's perfect for that roast pork she makes.”

Ummmm, oh that's going to be good.”

You hungry?”

I get hungry a lot here lately.”

It's the variety of food we have here.”

It is. Chris' mother had a wonderful dish.”


Yes, full of vegetables, meat, and gravy.”

She's a great cook.”

Like my mother.”

Hon, would you mind if we go look at those houses tomorrow?”


They say I own a lot of houses out there in a subdivision where Chris' parents live. I somehow know there's a house open on both sides of them. The one to the right of them, we'll let the Turlock's have since Adam will be marrying Steph some day. And then, we'll have Chris' house next to them and then there will be our and then your mother's. We'll need a house for Bernadette there because she's going to fall in love real fast with that pilot. Speaking of that pilot, I've got to get him sent there. Let's go into the hangar office and you tell the guys we need them send to Madrid. Or, you can witness me sending them there without me telling the man anything about your sisters, mother, or anyone. Ok?”

Sure, I trust you.”

I want your mom to believe in me. She's going to ask you if you verified it to be true and you can tell her honestly I never said anything to them.”

He nodded, “It matters to you.”

Yes, because I want her to believe in me totally. She's very protective of you and for her to hand you to me with her blessing, she has to believe in me.”

You think so?”

I know so. I read it in her. You just wait. On Tuesday of next week, she's going to go back to Madrid to pack everything and before she leaves, she's going to tell you she supports me totally. I'll not get that support if I've deceived her.”

You won't ever deceive me, will you?”

No, not at all.”

Good, I feel the same with you. I want you to know everything but it takes time for me to tell you.”

I pulled back a bit and took his chin in my palm, “I've seen him. You loved him and he hurt you. It made you angry, hurt, and most....embarrassed.”

It did.”

Everything has a purpose and everything has a reason. In order to have it happen, you had to experience it in order to know it wasn't meant to be. However, you loved and your heart hungered for the love. Now you've got it, once we have it built.”

You've had hurt and pain too.”

Yes, but I know it's better with you.”

Let's go get the plane sent for them to come.”

One moment.”

He looked into my eyes and I kissed him. The kiss was met with passion which surprised me and soon our hands were caressing each other feverishly. I broke the kiss and said, “Ren, let's wait until we're home. I feel things for you which are way deep. I want you to know this...

You feel your mother and your sisters has too much influence upon your life. You didn't want them to come, but that's because of that control. You're afraid it will happen again, but I want you to know when they see all is well and you're happy in our relationship, they will still love you, but the control is going to be over.

Your mother will still love you with the same concern, but I know it's love and worry because you are her only boy. She fears, but once she sees you are a man with great talents and it's safe, she's going to lighten her grasp. She's going to enjoy life more and yes, one day, even she is going to meet another guy who is going to sweep her off her feet.”


Yes. Now, what's amazing is I know the man, but I've never met him. I know him because he too, is in football. He's a coach and is a super great man. He's patient, kind, and he inspires greatness simply because he's like a father who everyone wants to please. He says words at the right moment and it's his talent.

What's amazing is I see your mother with him and it's an instant attraction. He falls hopelessly in love with her ability to laugh and smile and she falls in love with his strength, patience, and his smile. They build each other up and it's extremely passionate.”


Yes, but it's a few years off. They meet by chance at an owner's meeting and what's interesting is by the end of that weekend, their attraction is the beginning of a full blown love.”

Good. She needs that.”

What's interesting is we'll see him on the football field playing against his teams, but we never get to meet him until that weekend. When we do, she's going to be there. Well, Mimi will be there with Chris too, but he's going to shake our hands and smile slightly, and then when he gets to her, he's going to open up that smile and kiss her hand.”

Oh man, you're making me see it all so.”

So you see him too?”

Yes, his team colors are red, gold, and white. They've got a red helmet.”

You're seeing him.”

I'm amazed. Is this what you see?”

Yes, but what happens is I see it and it comes in flashes so it's different points in a person's life. I see them very young, then they age and find love and then, I see them go all the way until their death.”

Can you do that so I see Mimi and Chris?”

Let me try.”

I concentrated upon Mimi and then began to see flashes of her as a baby with young Ren standing by her bassinet. Then I saw her grow, age, meet Chris, become more assured of herself, grow to have a career working in Chris' merchandise store. Them having children and then growing older, marrying off their children, then, I saw her with a stroke and being paralyzed and then dying.”

Ren pulled back from me, “I saw it!”

What did you see?”

I saw her whole life. I saw them loving, their kids, them marrying their kids, them being on the cruise ships, them growing older and then she having that infarction and then saw her dying. I saw the date and I saw Chris' sadness, his giving up and him dying of a broken heart. I saw the date of his death, but I also saw the lives of their children, their loves, and their lives too.”

I smiled, “See how it happens?”

It's sad. It shows you when things are going to happen which are sad.”

Yes, but don't concentrate on those death dates. I don't pay attention to them because I'd rather enjoy people when they're with me and alive. Yes, I do get a portion of their intimate world, but it tells me they're loving and happy and satisfied.”

It is as you say, intense.”

Yes, but look at their lives. They're wonderful, vibrant, full of love, and so full. It's everything they want and look how confident she became.”

She did!”

Love does that. You will do it and your family will allow you to do it.”

Good, I was worried.”

Let's go get the plane sent for them.”

We walked over to the office and I saw a girl there. She smiled, “Hi Jake.”

Hi, are you our secretary here?”


Ok, what we need is the white plane to be sent to Madrid, Spain.”

It won't fly the distance non-stop. We'll have to send it up to Iceland and then down.”

Will the 747 make that flight non-stop?”

Yes, but it'll take twelve hours.”

Jeez, how long for it to fly back?”

Flying back, due to the time changes, it'd take the same amount of flying time, but in time changes, it'd arrive in only two hours.”

That just confused the hell out of me.”

She smiled, “I know. Here, let me explain it in language you'd understand. It's going to take ten hours to fly over and ten to fly back. It's going to take twenty hours total flying time.”

Can they do that without a break?”

Ummm, technically, not, but what I can do is put our pilots from the little one on the plane and then, they can refuel and fly it back. It's not a real hard flight on them due to auto pilot, but it does make for a long day.”

Can the entire team fly on the middle jet?”

Yeah, that's no problem. I'll have to ground the little jet, but if you need it, I can fly it if needed.”

DO you all trade off?”


Good, I was concerned you weren't getting flying time.”

I flew the 747 tonight. I'm on call to fly it, but what I can do is get my co-pilot to prep it and then have the little plane's pilots rest while we're flying over.”

Oh, I forgot they flew us tonight. They'd need rest.”

They'll get it. They're used to the routine.”

It's not often we have this happen, but maybe when we have them go home, we can send them in the little plane and go around through Iceland and wherever.”

Heathrow and then on down.”

Jeez, that's a long ways isn't it.”

Yeah, but I wouldn't suggest you buying another 747.”

No, not unless my business starts dictating I start making these trips all over the place. Well, tell him to get it prepped, but before he does that, I want to see it. I was on it for a split second earlier, but I've never been on it. It'd be nice to see what I bought.”

You got a deal on it. I'll tell you now. It's top of the line, but from what I hear, you didn't get hurt on the purchase. Well, you didn't get hurt on any of them actually.”

I have no idea what I paid. Isn't that dumb!”

You spent a hundred and thirty million for all three.”

How much would it have normally cost?”

Two twenty.”

Jeez, I hear I paid four hundred thousand for a table in that little one. Is that right?”

She smiled and gave a light chuckle. “It's an option which costs that in the book.”

It blows me away a table would cost that much. I could buy two houses back home for that much.”

The plane is the board room edition. It's supposed to cost seventeen million. You picked it up for a little over eight.”



Jeez, I guess it beats travelling by bus, but damn!”

She laughed, “Jake, the prices are a bit staggering, but the convenience is why you bought them.”

How much was that middle one?”

Thirty eight million.”

I think I need to sit down because that just told me that big som'bitch cost nearly seventy million dollars!”

It's top of the line, but I'll tell you now it's a wonderful plane. You did get it for about half of what it would've cost you new.”

It's a used plane!”

No, it's the end of the model run clearance.”

Sheesh! Thank God! Now, what runs a plane up that much?”

You have top grain leathers. You've got gold pulls and woods which are perfectly matched. You've got a full butler's pantry and galley. You've got custom china, and Waterford crystal. You've got bedding and you've got an office with full weather and navigations both front and back.”

Why have it in the back? I mean, if I'm going to crash, I'm not going to be so curious as to want to see it happening. I'm going to be on my knees pulling up the closest mass on television, I hope!”

She laughed and Ren laughed too.

Well, you do have satellite television with a nice cinema choice.”

Nice, I didn't hear top of the line. For seventy million, I wanted to hear it was the best.”

She smiled, “It's going to last you thirty years. That plane would cost you about seventeen million a year to lease. You got a deal.”

Whew, so how much does it take to run one of those things?”

Ummmm, each flight to Missouri runs you about eleven thousand dollars without flight crew.”

Son of a bitch! That's like twenty five thousand a day!”

Yes, but your flight to Madrid is going to be a little over that each way.”

Go ahead and get them on that. This is a special circumstance.”

Ren was giving me a sick look, “You don't have to.”

I need to. She's your mom and our relationship counts on it.”

The woman picked up the phone and said, “We need the 747 prepped for a flight to Madrid. We're going to be going within the hour.”

I asked, “Now, I want to ask a question which probably isn't asked often.”


What's the top speed that thing can fly?”

About six twenty or six thirty depending upon how high we get clearance. Why?”

Can you push it going over?”

She smiled, “Sure.”

Coming back, is different, but I'd like them to know we got there a bit faster.”

She smiled, “It's his mom?”

His mom and sisters. They're coming over to see he's safe, happy, and cared for.”

Let me pull my pilots who normally fly it and get get the white plane's pilots.”


The pilots who normally fly it aren't going to push it to the limit coming back. They'll tell you all sorts of things so it's not done, and I don't blame them. Just the same, I'll tell you that flight over there can be done in eight hours. It can be done in the same time.”

So an hour flight prep and an hour over there, right?”

An hour flight prep here. Eight hours flight to get there or a little less and then, we'll have very little time prepping there. We're not shutting down and all which needs done is fueling. There's no dumping because no one was using the facilities.”

Ok, I'm going to ask another question and this is just real dumb, but what's on that plane underneath?”

I'm not following what you're asking. In the lower compartment?”

Yeah, I'll tell you why I'm asking, but I specifically asked we have it so our golf carts and team supplies be on the plane.”

Let me show you how it's done.”

She went out of the office and I followed. She pointed over across the hangar and said, “That's your supplies. Those are the golf carts and there's your merchandise, merchandise stand, and guest tents. Over there is your filming equipment, interview booth materials and the tent which houses that. Over there is food and Buffett equipment and the tent for that.”

All that is ours?”

Yeah, it's out here all the time.”

Ok, I don't have an asset list of that.”

The equipment went on the leased jet you had before this. All that fits in the belly, but it's a tight fit. We make it work, but there's a full load on the plane when she flies with you guys on board.”

Ok, when she flies with that on board, she flies slower, right?”

No, she flies the same. She's just not as graceful and she's using a lot more fuel. We're more at max than normal and that's why I know we can get there in less time.”

Ok, now is there a best grade of fuel to use like in cars?”

She chuckled, “No, it's pretty much just the same. We might pick up some bad fuel in the lesser known parts of the world, but before I'd want to take on fuel, I'm going to want to top off and try making it out of there to somewhere I know we can get decent fuel.”

Ok, now, the next question I've got. On Friday night, we're flying down to Dallas. It's going to be full equipment and supplies. I'm not sure what all of that to take, but we'll probably want to show off. However, on Saturday, he's got to go to Anaheim, but I've got to go to Houston. I can take the little one, but it's got to be in Dallas. However, here's where it gets tricky.

On Sunday, we're flying full loads of people out of Columbia, Missouri to Dallas and will probably be flying all three planes shuttle back and forth for at least two trips. Can you do it?”

How many people?”

I don't know. We're inviting the whole town to go to the football game. We could have several hundred to several thousand people.”

Can I make a suggestion?”


Charter planes”

Have three commercial aircraft at the ready and take the first loads down when they fill. If there are more needed, we can fly them in ours, but from what it sounds like, you're going to need commercial planes which hold more people.”

How many does our 747 handle?”

At the most a hundred and twenty people. That's with everything full and everyone seated wherever we can put them. On a commercial jet, you can get a lot more people on one.”

Ok, we'll do that. I might put dignitaries on our planes. I hate thinking that way, but it's the truth. HOWEVER, you do a scan and if you see the Sheriff on the plane, you humbly walk over to the man and tell him Jake Martin said for him to get his ass off his plane.”

I take it you've got a problem with him?”

The man got a 9-1-1 call someone was committing suicide and didn't send a fucking ambulance. All I got sent that direction was a couple of firemen. No police, no ambulance, and nothing but a fire truck. When it happened again, later in the day, they sent the firemen and an ambulance because the firemen told the ambulance to come...well, the prosecuting attorney told them. BUT still no police.”

It sounds like the law there isn't supportive.”

He got told by the two most wealthy people in that town that we're putting every dollar we've got behind his opposition when someone runs against him. I promised it and I'll deliver it if it costs me every cent I have.”

I understand is that why you're here now?”

No, I bought a team. This is my spot in life and it's what I'm to do for the next fifteen years. After that, I'll own the team, but it'll be an investment which I operate along side everything else.”

Good, you're going to be an active owner.”


I'm glad. I heard about the last guy and he wasn't.”

The last guy was a total dipshit. If you knew what he went through everything in his bank account, you'd be blown away.”

I thought he was rather well off!”

He went into it with thirteen million dollars. He used it to get into a savings and loan and used those people's money to invest in all he had. Thirteen million bought him the key to the vault of the savings and loan and he looted it.”

I take it you're more sound financially.”

Oh hell yeah. I just bought that savings and loan for half a billion. Yeah, I'm getting the keys to the vault, but I'm also liquidating assets and putting in better. The cable company got liquidated for eight hundred million and got invested in what will be bringing in that much in four months. This team is one of the assets as are a lot of other things, but I'm flying blind because he didn't require asset sheets. You're showing me that stuff there and I had no clue it was ours.”

He wasn't on top of that. I'll get an inventory done for you.”

Good. Just let me know what I've got because I have no idea. I'm glad to know you're going to do it because I'm about to order more golf carts and all that. Hell, it might've already gotten done!”

I'll get it done for you. Now, do you need some flying done tomorrow?”

Yeah, it's a busy day. I'll need a pilot for the middle jet all day long all the way into late tomorrow night.”

What's on the itinerary?”

In the morning, I'm flying to New York. I'm doing the Today show, so I've got to be there at seven am. I do that and then I'm flying back with the President of NBC. I'm striking a deal to buy a major block of their shares, so I need to impress.

Tomorrow afternoon, I've got to fly to Missouri for practice. The plane will come back and pick up a load of lawyers which have endorsement contracts for my players. Then, we're flying the whole bunch out to Los Angeles while I do contract negotiations with them. The plane will then wait while we do the Leno Show and then come back to Missouri, make a drop and then, come on here.”

You're adding how many lawyers?”

I'm not sure. A helluva bunch of them.”

You're going to need a bigger plane.”

Hang on, let me see if I can borrow one.”

See if you can borrow their pilots too.”


I called Tom. “Hello?”

Hi, I need a favor.”

What's that?”

I need to borrow your 747. Tomorrow afternoon until late tomorrow night.”

Ok, it's open, but why?”

Mine is flying to Madrid, but I'm taking my team to LA tomorrow to do Leno and I'm hauling lawyers too. We're doing endorsement negotiations, so I need a big plane.”

How many are you flying to Madrid?”

It's flying empty and picking up four people.”


My new fella is from there. His mom and sisters are coming from Madrid over here until next Tuesday.”

How about this. I know someone over there who has a long range jet. He's in England. He can have it fly down there and then they can fly back there.”

How long would that take and how much would I owe him?”

Let me call him and get back with you.”


I hung up and said, “He's going to call a friend in England and see if his friend can fly a long range plane down and pick them up.”

That'd be good. He'd be there in about three hours and they'd be here in about seven hours...depending how fast it is.”

How much do those cost?”

For one the size of your little one, it'd be about forty to fifty million.”

Jeez, those things sure cost a lot!”

She smiled, “Think of them as being the Rolls Royce Limos of the air. That's what it's like, but about a hundred times more expensive.”


The door opened and in walked Dolly, Jan, and Andy. Jan smiled, “We were waiting!”

Hon, we're waiting on some calls. I'm trying to see if I need to send a plane to Madrid, or if I need to borrow a plane.”

Ummm, who are you borrowing a plane from?”

Some guy over in England. Tom Benson knows him.”

Why don't you call your friend Madonna and see if you can borrow hers. She's in France.”

How close is that?”

Ren said, “Closer.”

Ok, let me call her. She's going to be pissed I woke her up.”

I pulled up the number and dialed. “Hello?”

I need to speak with Madge and tell her it's important.”

Hang on, she's in meditation.”

Ok, tell her it's Jake Martin and Ren and I are an item. Tell her I need to get his mom and sisters from Madrid and brought here. I'm calling to see if I can borrow her jet to get them here as mine is in Akron and her's is closer.”

She doesn't lend her plane out.”

Tell her to give me a call. I'm also aware I don't speak with her help because they tend to piss me off.”

Call back some other time.”

I'll call her personal phone. I bet I get through. When I do, I'm going to tell her I spoke with Niki and Niki was an obstructive bitch to me. I bet she comes unglued.”

How'd you know my name?”

Niki, I can tell you who you went down on last night. Now, ask me if Madge would be happy if she knew it was her man.

You also tell her about the fucking trick you pulled on the fucking champagne she ordered or I'll do it. She's wondering how in the fuck she got so woozy from the, fuck it. I'll call her private number. I know it now from talking to you. She needs to be out of that bed with that fucking snake anyways.”

I hung up and dialed the number. “Hello, and this better be good.”

It's me Madge.”

Jake, what the hell!”

Sit up and them stretch that phone cord out to see if it'll slip around that motherfucker's neck you're laying next to. If it does, do so ever so gently and then tie a knot. Then, you throw the phone across the room and tell that fucker I said for him to pack his shit and get gone.”


Hon, that man is fucking half your help and had you drugged last night.

You went to sleep after drinking champagne Niki spiked. While you were under, Niki blew that bastard and then he told her how he was using you to get his career boosted. She told him how to get it done and what she'd do to help.”

How'd you know this?”

I called the number you gave me and Niki answered. I read the bitch after she got hateful and told me you didn't lend out your jet.”

I don't lend out my jet. Well, I don't normally lend it out, but if you need it, I'll do it.”

No, you just be on it and get the hell out of that snake pit. Those people aren't nice around you and why you put up with vermen when you should have loyalty is beyond me.”

I'm getting up now. You're scaring me.”

I'm fearful for your being there. Just get to the airport and have Julia handle everything. She's the only loyal person you've got there and she's being kept from you by that fucking Niki.

When you call her, she's going to tell you exactly what I told you. She's even got proof from the shringe they used to put it through the cork.”

Oh man.”

Hon, be thankful they didn't want you dead. Their goal was getting you to sleep so they could have their fling.”

I'm dressed. Now, what do you need me to do?”

Ren and I are together. I was calling to ask about getting your jet to pick up his mom and sisters in Madrid. I need them brought here.”

Ok, what I'll do is I'll fly to Madrid and get them sent on. I can stay there if Ren will let me use his villa.”

Hang on, I'll ask.”

I looked over and asked, “Can she use your villa while your family is over here?”

Yeah, tell her it's hers for as long as she needs.”

Did you hear him?”

Yeah, tell him he's a beautiful person.”

Don't I know it.”

I told you that you'd like him, but little thanks I get.”

Hon, I'm too busy falling for the man to call. I'm sorry.”

She chuckled. “I thought of him and it just clicked you two would be right together.”

You did excellent work sis.”

Thanks. If I had a brother as hot as you...”


She laughed. “Well, I'm on my way out of here.”

Slap the fuck out of Niki and tell her I said she's a bitch.”

If I start doing that to the help, I get sued into oblivion.”

Ok, so don't and know I'd punch the bitch in her face if I was there.”

She laughed, “Jake, you're pissed.”

Hell yeah! That was wrong!”

I wondered how I could get so sleepy on the champagne, but I thought maybe I'd not eaten enough.”

With help like her, you sure should get rid of the body guards. She's inside that outer perimeter. From now on, keep one of those guys watching your well being.”

I'll have you read me.”

You're going to be fine. Fire everyone there but Julia. You're going to have a diamond bracelet stolen, so be sure to get all of them which are still there.”

Hang on.” She was quiet for a moment and asked, “Who has it?”

He gave it to Niki and Niki has given it to a cook who is holding it. If you go to the kitchen, look in the flour canister. It will be in that.”

I'll stop by there before I leave.”

Can you get sued if you drag her there by her hair and make her eat flour?”

I'm tempted. Don't think I'm not tempted.”

Hon, I'd be a hateful girl if I was one. You girls are too damned nice to hateful people.”

She chuckled. “It gives us reputations as being divas.”

Then wear it proudly if it makes you learn how to throw a punch!”

She laughed, “Hon, you're not going to be able to do that either.”

I did it today. You'd be amazed at how it got an apology.”

You what!”

I put Grant on his ass. He said something hateful and down he went.”

Oh man.”

I guess I'm a divo now.”

She laughed. “You're good for me. I'll call you when I get to the car.”

I'll be here.”

I hung up and dialed Tom. “Hello?”

It's me, I got a plane.”

Who got one faster?”

Madonna, she's in France.”

Man, you know her?”

Yeah, she set me up with my new boyfriend.”

She's a powerful woman.”

She just told me she wasn't.”

Tell her she's full of shit.”

Not yet, she's letting me use her plane. When she tells me her plane is in the air headed this way from Madrid, I'll tell her YOU said she's full of shit.”

He chuckled, “Yeah, make her hate me before she meets me!”

No, I wouldn't do that to you. However, if you knew what someone did to her last night and how she wouldn't beat the girl's ass when I just told her, you'd say she wasn't powerful.”


Yeah, now have someone drug me when I didn't know it and blow my boyfriend while I'm drugged, I'll wake up and kick some ass.”

Someone did that to her?”


Oh man, she's got bodyguard's right?”

It was her inner circle who did it to her. Seven people are probably getting fired right now because only one person is good out of the bunch.”

Jeez, and we think people like her lives good.”

Little do we know. Well, I appreciate the effort. I'm sorry I got someone faster, but I'm glad I did.”

I got the invitation to Tan-Tar-A. You're doing good.”

Thanks, I didn't know I sent it. I'll tell Jan thanks.”

He chuckled. “You've got good help.”

She's the best. I'd introduce you if you wouldn't take her away. Instead, I've got to hitch her up with my doctor dude.”

There ya go! Keep it in the house!”

Thanks Tom.”

I got off the phone and said, “She's going to call be back, but it's a go.”

Jan smiled, “So I'm hitching up with our doc?”

Yeah, you better if you're going to let the man see down there when you deliver.”


Fool someone else hon, the rabbit died.”

She had a surprised look on her face. “You know?”

Yeah and I know whose soul the baby's got and you best let me be a major influence on him.”

It's a boy!”

Yeah, with Jared's eyes and his soul.”

Oh man, I'll give you full rights to raise him all that you want. I know you loved him.”

I did, do, and will.”

Ok, well, I don't need to get a pregnancy test now.”

It sure explains that craving you have.”

I do NOT have cravings.”

uh huh, ask Dolly if hot dogs with peanut butter and sardines on them isn't a craving. That's just gross.”

Dolly looked surprised and Jan's face went white. “You saw that!”

I saw it and hon, I tasted that. Please tell me to stay out of your cravings. You didn't have sickness tonight because I was the one gagging.”

She smiled and turned to Dolly, “What did I tell you?”

Dolly chuckled, “She said she bet you were going to read her and gag.”

Well, she was right.”

The other pilot got there and said, “I'm going to go out and spool up, do you want to help?”

Yeah, I'll be right there.”

I asked real quick, “What does it take to get one started?”

We have a battery booster we wheel out. In order to do so, we've got to get a tug to pull it out of the hangar and get the plane aimed out onto the field. They chock the wheels and then once we do the inspection, we get a stair truck over and get us on board. We spool up and once the engines are started, we can either have the stair truck come back over or we can get off.”

It doesn't have power if it's not running?”

Very very little power.”

Tell him to leave it be. I'll look at it some other time. Now, what would it take to get it to land at Moberly?”

Oh dear, the runway there is long enough and built heavy enough, but we'd need a hangar, a booster, a stair truck, a tug, and de-icing equipment. You might need a dump wagon too.”

Find out how much all that costs and send me a quote sheet.”

I can get you a tug cheap with a bar. A stair truck is going to be a chore because they're usually worn smooth out when they get rid of them.”

If you can find one, I'll get a new truck under it, or one which has a good motor.”

It doesn't need to be fancy. The booster pack should be on the tug. Chocks aren't anything, so that's not a problem. I think we have extras around here. De-icing equipment is going to be better if you can get a power washer with a lift platform. My suggestion is you get a lift platform which scissors up. It can be pulled with a tug.”

Ok, I'll see how much one costs out there.”

You're probably leasing a bus to run back and forth to Columbia. I'd say it's cheaper to lease the bus than it is to land there.”

It's a time thing. Even a half an hour is a long time when we're practicing.”

Oh. When is the end of your season?”

By Christmas.”

How about we do land and take offs from there? We could do a stair truck and that's it...if we can take up and land in Columbia.”

Are we the only one who uses the stair truck in Columbia?”

I don't know. What I'd suggest is a lift truck. You can lease those.”

What's that?”

It's a lift bed truck. It lifts the bed up and loads things on and off. If you guys don't mind getting into the bed off a truck and lowered down and then driven away, it'd be fine.”

I don't mind if that's all it take to get us in there.”

Let me see if they've got one in Missouri. I imagine they do in a major city. You could lease it.”

Ok, now, another question and I'm getting really nit pickish here. How much do they charge us to dump and tug?”

If you got us those things here, we'd save several grand a week.”


She smiled. “I'll look into it. It's a good investment.”

Ok, do that because it'd pay for itself.”

My phone rang. “Hello?”

It's me.”

You make it out ok?”

Yeah, it was in the flour as you said. You should have seen the look on that girl's face! I walked by her and calmly said, “Needless to say, you're fired.”

Fire everyone but Julia. She's the keeper in that bunch.”

I'll do that.”

Ask your pilot how fast to Madrid and then, I'll rest easier.”

Two and a half hours.”

Ok, great. Now, this isn't a problem for you, is it?”

Being woken up was a problem, but knowing what you saved me isn't. You more than made up for it.”

I appreciate this.”

Just be good to him.”

I am. He's already happy going to ecstatic. I'll let you know when I get him to blissful.”

She laughed, “You're too much!”

That's what he said, but I said I'd be gentle.”

Oh man, I agree. You'd be amazed at how your picture is around everywhere and how you're being talked about.”


Even royalty are talking about that dick of yours.”

Shut up! Really?”

Hon, I had a Count ask me if I knew you and I told him I'd met you and came over. He asked me if it was really as big as it looked. I told him you never tired because you used it as a tripod so you could rest standing up.”

I laughed, “Oh man, you're a nut.”

Hon, he's a very sweet guy. I think you're making a mistake bringing his family over, but you might've seen that already.”

They're going to accept me and then loosen up.”

Be thankful. They're rather possessive of him.”

I saw that.”

Good, it'd help him to have them, but it'd only help if they loosen the choke hold they've got on the leash they've got him on.”

They will.”

Well, I'm at the airport. I'll get them to you.”


No probs hon.”

She hung up and I said, “They'll be here in about ten or eleven hours. You need to tell your mom to be at the private terminal in three hours.”

Ok, may I call now?”

Yeah, but let's do it as we're riding home.”

He nodded. I went over and hugged the pilot lady. “Thanks for all you've done. I'm sorry I upset things and then ran out.”

Don't be. It's good to finally meet you.”

By the way, if that person who was hog tied in the back today ever tries to get on one of our planes again, you tell him absolutely not. IF he pulls a pistol, you go into highjack mode and we'll get him on federal charges. I don't want him here anymore. He's got a restraining order on him.”

Good, I knew there was a reason you had him trussed up.”

You tell the pilots who was flying the little jet I understand they didn't know what he was up to, however, if any of them ever take him this direction again, I'll see they never fly again for anyone including freight.”

She nodded. “I'll do that.”

Just between you and I. He had a pistol this close to my face when I got to the office this morning. It was loaded.”


Yeah, that's what I said when the fucking thing went off after I knocked him out cold.”

She looked shocked. I hugged her again and said, “Thanks again.”

We left and on the ride downtown, Ren made his call. He got off the phone and smiled, “Mama was surprised you knew Madonna. When she found out she's who introduced us, she was even more surprised.”

When we got close, I told Jan to take Andy to the Clarion and then take us on to her place. I could drive the Town Car on over to my place.”

No can do. You're contracted to a GM product.”

They don't have it in the contract.”

Don't give them ammunition and they won't shoot. Let's get you into another car.”

Ok, that'll require going all the way up to the office to get keys.”

They're now down in the security office.”

Ok, that's easier. Drop us off and we'll get a 'vette or something.”

You've got an early morning. DO you want a call?”

Yeah, you might. I'll set my alarm on my phone, but it'd be good to have a back up plan.”

I'll do it hon. Are you taking Andy or Ren with you?”

I turned to Ren. “Do you want to meet your mom here, or fly with me to New York?”

Jan interrupted, “Hon, it's ten hours. You should be back in time.”

It's about eight our time, right?”


I won't be back in time. They're going to have me on at seven thirty and that's not going to make it good.”

Ren said, “I'll stay here. I'll need a ride to the airport.”

We'll need to have their luggage and everything carried.”

I leaned forward and spoke to Jan. “Three houses down the street from Chris' family's house. It's empty, right?”


Ok, how about furniture?”

It's got it.”

Ok, put them in that one. Ren and I will be taking the one next to theirs towards Chris' parents. Put Chris in the one in between his parents and I.”

Ok, but why?”

He's going to meet Mimi, who is Ren's youngest sister. They'll fall for each other and you'll be about to pop when that wedding happens.”


He works fast hon. I gotta get to my little house in Moberly to get an engagement ring I promised him.”

He's going to get engaged this weekend?”

No, but if I don't get it for him, he'll not get engaged at Christmas.”

Ok, you just be aware I have enough repo-ed jewelry to start a shop.”

We might find a stone for him in that, but I'll want it in a new setting.”

Smart move.”

Now, about my place over there. What's it like?”

You didn't see it?”

I didn't see anything much except a line of houses. They're fancy.”

Touch my hand.”

I touched her hand and then read the house. “Ok, so there's furniture...but no bedding or linens.”

I can't tell you. I went through them at a fast pace.”

Get a decorator out there and tell them I need that house done pronto. I sure don't want his mom to see the porn palace.”

What about your things in Missouri?”

I have no clue when I can get it moved. There's no time.”

We could hire a crew.”

Let me call Grant. Well, I need to call Mike because he sure didn't get me a restraining order.”

I dialed the phone and sat back. “Hello?”

Hi, it's me.”

Hi, how are things for you?”

Going well, but I didn't see you.”

I missed you over at your house. Mrs Watson said you'd already been there and had left to go to the airport.”

Yeah, so everything ok?”

Things were way tense here. He was going to leave until I pointed at the street and told him to get to walking. Then I reminded him it'd be jail time for him if he violated the order.

Kit's dad signed the order and read it. When he did, I told him what happened and what Kit had done and that you were being way too nice and understanding.”

What did he say?”

Well, they're now forbidden to be around each other is what he said. He said he was going to order her to forget any attachment to Robbie and to expect a full apology.”

Not happening. I want that order to be for her too. She tried to come to the stadium tonight and got a football put right by her head. She got the message.

BUT, you tell her she doesn't know Chris' name anymore either. He's moving here and is about to meet the girl for him.”

Ok, I'll get one put out for him against both of them too. I'll tell the judge you want one against Kit also.”

Both of them conspired against me, so both of them need to stay the hell away. Also, if you happen to see that Sheriff, you tell him the open invitation I'm putting out for everyone to go to the game on Sunday is open to everyone but him. I've already made arrangements to have three 747's hired to take people down, and I'm arranging to have dignitaries flown in my team's jets. I told my pilots to tell the Sheriff to get off my planes and the reason behind my call on that.”

It's open warfare against him.”

Yeah, and if Grant dare wants to change his opinions on that, you be sure to let me know and I'll cut him out of my life completely as well as off this team. I can dig up reasons to get rid of him if need be.”

I heard things were tense there tonight.”

Sorta. I punched him in the mouth and was ready to call you to get my name off everything of his. BUT then I decided to play hard ball and tell him I'd sue his name off everything if he wanted to keep what he said.”

What did he say?”

He insinuated the reason he put my name on things was because I blackmailed him over him having sex with me being under aged.”


Yeah, it got him punched in the mouth and knocked on his ass. He then tried to lie and say the words came out wrong. They didn't because there was no way those words could've been changed to be different.”

What was his problem?”

He met Ren and likes him. He feels insecure and let it roll across his vocal cords.”

I heard you have a new fella.”

Yeah, he's great.”

Did you get approval?”

Yeah, I got it before I even got into the conversation with him about dating. The problem is with my life going the speed it is, dating is a sort of hang on and go for the ride sort of thing.”

How are you doing it?”

We're running around together and moving him in. He's free to leave when he wants if he wants and that's how I'm doing it.”

Don't do anything financial with him for a while.”

It depends how you mean that. I'm already doing some things, but you're correct, I'm not going to ask you to do anything for me in that manner.”

Ok, now what have you done for him?”

Not right now. I'll call you in the morning on that.”

Ok, I gather you want that kept private.”


Anything new?”

I need to get the ownership papers for the cable company sent to my phone company. I traded it tonight.”

For what?”

Eight hundred million worth of cell towers.”

How many is that?”

A hundred and sixty thousand.”


Yeah, I've got the investment group more territory in Kansas, however I'm going to tell you now Robbie is voted out of that.”

I understand.”

You and your family are on the ropes. You guys never came to a get together and how it's going to happen now, I don't know. I imagine we'd have a little get together in Dallas, but that's up to you. All I ask is don't think the location is a loophole to shove Robbie through. I'll shoot a football out into that crowd in a heartbeat to nail him in the mouth.”

I doubt if we'll go to that.”

Well, we're getting everyone together down here that I can. I'll probably be way busy, but after the game, my private jet is flying those people back home after we have a little party. All I can say is I'll recuse myself from voting you guys out after that because I really think it's the third time in three months.”

What do you have on deck for next weekend?”

A game in Indianapolis and the owner's meeting at Tan-Tar-A. I would like to have you attend that.”

Could I bring them then?”

No. I can't have everyone down there for that, so it's not going to be considered a get together. Maybe you're not getting it, but these are sort of like backyard barbecues where you can introduce your family to your friends you grew up with and on a monthly basis have reconnections. That's all this is about. If you don't want that, then that's that.

Grant ignorantly chose to make it an investment group. I disagree strongly with it because it smells of paying your friends to be your friends. I told him that then, and I feel it strongly now.

The only difference is he wanted me to put the investment group on Australia and I flat out told him no. That was to be for he and I and that's it. If we can be friends, that's fine, but it's not because of anything monetarily.

However, I'll say this Mike. IF I told you and your family that I'd give you ten million dollars to show up someplace, I imagine you'd show. You knew about the investments, but still that didn't happen. So, I guess it doesn't matter to stay in touch with friends, or for the money.

What's interesting is the ones who show don't know about the money. They're there and they have a good time. You get along with all of them and I'm sure there's a reason your family isn't coming. I don't know about that blood if it's bad, or good, but I'd say since I didn't get taken to your house by Grant, there's something there which isn't good.”

There are ill feelings.”

Well, it's on both sides since he didn't even let me know she and he were related. To be honest, the only family I've met is his brother who has the car dealer and his cousin Ted...well, Jack, but Jack likes me and really doesn't agree totally with Grant on much.”

Grant has been manipulative with most everyone in regards to money. IF he says otherwise, I'd beg to differ strongly. He's given quite a bit and he does it without reluctance, but afterwards, he's really let them know it was his bidding and they should be more grateful. It grinds them down and it's done so with him trying to lift himself up. Needless to say, his family isn't on the sidelines cheering anything he does real loud.”

Well, I understand that, but would it get under their skin so much as to come and watch the team play? Or, is it you guys think watching the team means you're patting him on the back? Because I'll tell you you're slapping a helluva lot of guys in the face to slap him.”

I get your point, but I think you hit the nail on the head.”

Well, be so polite to tell your wife I think she and her siblings suck. That's real petty but when you piss on a football team to shower the coach....well, let's just say I sure understand where Robbie got it. I didn't expect him to have gotten it in that manner, but I understand it better.”

I need to get off the phone. This phone call is getting to be upsetting.”

Sure. I imagine it is. Ship my files out to my office.”

Now don't get that way!”

Mike, I like you as a person, but other than Mr and Mrs O who have to ride herd and hide all that hate in that family, there isn't many I like. Yeah, I like the one's who've taken the time to get to know me...except your son, but the line sure hasn't formed to even to get to know me.

I call it as I see it. The bunch is conditional. If you say it's unconditional, think about it because there's strings all over the place.

Yeah, Grant is spinning webs more than a starving spider, but none of them really had the balls to put him on his ass. I did. You'd be amazed at how fast he apologized when the thought he was going to lose it, me, and some face.

When it all comes down to it, I'll be so blunt as to say the family who works for him perpetuate the abuse. The second they ever got backbone enough to stand up and tell him they quit, is the second the power trip ceases.

He's got to start puckering to kiss some ass and as I see it, no one's making him do it except me. Well, tonight, he did that and he kissed it good enough he got me off him. It was foreign to him, but I understand it better.

What that bunch fails to see is I cut Jack's strings for him. Believe me Grant fought it, but they're cut. Jack's his own man. Ted's his own man, and I imagine there's going to be respect growing in their direction.”

My wife doesn't owe him a thing.”

Ok, so tell her to slap him down in a different way. Tell her to smile politely and tell him she didn't come down there to pat him on the back, but to watch his team. I bet you if she does, she's suddenly going to see him putting on some Chapstick so his lips are soft and ready for the ass he's about to start kissing simply because once the dominoes start falling, word gets out and they fall all the faster.”

You've got a point.”

Well, it's dysfunctional because somehow the baby in the family got all the power. He obviously didn't have me as an older brother because he'd gotten an ass whuppin' and told he was a punk a long time ago.”

They're too polite for all that.”

I know. It came from Mrs O., because Mr O sure enough tells him he's a punk real fast. She does it in her own way, but believe me, she gives him a smack down real subtly.”

I wasn't aware of that.”

I used them one time to get to him. I'm sure they're still telling him he's an idiot when he gives any indication he's lonely.”

Would you forgive and forget if I got them down there to meet you?”

You know me better than that Mike. Hell, with all the forgiving I do for Grant after all the times I've said I'd never speak with him again, you ought to know better.”

I know you've got patience for him, but I also happen to know you love him.”

They love him too. It's gotten dusty, but tell them to hold their noses...not from the stinking love he gives but because I'll be sure shaking the hell out of things attempting to get him to sneeze.”

He chuckled. “He needs you for that.”

He needs someone who will make him grovel like he does everyone else. When he tastes it, he'll lessen his output.”

I think you're giving it to him in spades.”

Yeah, but that's simply to be a friend now, not a lover. Now that I'm talking, I realize Jordan is totally wrong for him.”

You were trying to set them up?”

Yeah, I got told he'd already grown to regret fucking one under aged person who'd cost him half of everything he owned.”

Oh, is that when you put him on his butt?”



It was almost word for word verbatim what I said there. I'll tell you I saw red and just reach out and popped him in the jaw. It was like slow motion.”

You were upset.”

Yeah, and I just realized I totally didn't take Ren by Mr Owsley's.”

You must really care for him to try getting him around to everyone you like.”

I do. It's strange, but as time goes with him, I'm growing to care more and more for him. It's not like the way it's been with anyone else, it's a slow thing. He sticks in my mind and I think about how I can make things better for him. He makes me want to be my best and man oh man, we kissed and the world caught on fire.”

I have that.”

I sure know that!”

You can embarrass me.”

I know it's intrusive, but it really blows me away the love you two have. It's weird, but you've got it from the heart and Grant told me he only does that sort of thing to be manipulative.”


You heard it. Someone did it to him and manipulated him. They dropped him and he got burned. Yeah, he probably deserved it, but he was a vir....son of a bitch, he was talking about my dad! That motherfucker!”

Are you ok?”

Yeah, it was a puzzle piece there which was a bit strange. I now see it fits.”

He never told you everything, but he told you someone manipulated him.”

He said he was a virgin and the guy played his erogenous zones and had him feeling things he'd never felt. Then, he said the guy dumped him and he felt used. He never said it was my dad, but I also know he and my dad were the ones who took each other's cherries.”

Ok, let me step in here. I'm going to say something and I'll tell you now your dad never manipulated him. Your dad gave everyone everything he ever got from them. Yeah, we all lent to each other and yeah, we paid each other back, but I'll tell you now, if your dad manipulated him, we all manipulated him for the same parts. I got mine from my dad's junk yard, but I got everyone else parts from the junk yard too. When we went new, we used the account Grant had because it was cheaper. So, if that's what he's meaning, we all did it...but he used us too.”

I see what you brought to the table, but what did my dad bring to the table?”

He was someone who when you needed someone, he was there. He'd jump in to help without you asking him to. He just sensed you needed help and showed up to be that one. I can't tell you how many Saturday mornings he would show up at the junkyard when I had chores to do and stepped in to help me.”


Yeah, my dad made us clean the junkyard on Saturdays. It wasn't that hard, but we had a tractor with a wagon which we went around and picked up scrap.

It was a lot different than it is now because cars didn't have plastic in them like they do now. The scrap would be metal, strips of chrome, or whatever, but one wrong step on something and it'd slice through a pair of shoes.

Jeff would come over and we'd walk around the lot and we'd make a game of throwing stuff into the back of that wagon seeing who could make the biggest racket with what we threw. It was simple fun, but it got the job done a whole lot faster than when I would have to do it by myself.”

Well, let me ask this. What did Eric bring to the table?”

Comic relief. That's all he ever brought to the table. He had more stories about him than anyone else simply because of the things he'd dream up and do.”

I can understand that.”

I'll also tell you he was the one who dreamt up stuff which was just plain dumb.”

Like what?”

Somehow, he convinced us it was longer to walk to college hill to go sled riding than it was to go out to the park and go off the levee.”


Yeah, now how much further is that?”

Jeez, three miles!”

He had us convinced it was shorter.”

I gave a chuckle which was just from total unbelief. “I can't believe you thought that and what's dumb is the hill out at the levee is half as big.”

I know, but we'd go out there. Yeah, it was a lot less crowded, but we'd happily trudge along to get there because we thought we were walking less.”

I can't believe you guys fell for it!”

Your dad had a way he'd demonstrate it was longer, but he didn't really complain. What'd he'd do is he'd put one of those stick candies in his mouth and suck on it as we walked. He'd be done with two of them and would tell us when we got there, “Guys, walking to the college takes me less than one. This walk takes two. I'm going through twice as much candy getting out here.' To which Eric would tell him that he was just less hungry that day.”

I giggled. “Man, Eric and I need to work together on cons. I got someone that good today.”


Well, as I told you, I traded the cable company for cell towers. Well, I had planned on selling the cable company to get NBC stock. So, needless to say, I didn't have the billion I intended. Therefore, I was on the phone with John, so I asked him if he wanted to invest in the NBC stock with me. He said he would and asked how much. I told him the billion I had intended, so he agreed to put up all the money and go halves with me.”

Now come back with that? You had him put up the money and you're giving him half of what you buy?”

Yeah, the rest is called finder's fee.”

No, the rest is just plain robbing him! Man, he went for it?!”

Yeah, he was happy about it and even gave me permission to buy more. SO, I'll do it because it's worth it.”

Jake, I'm just speechless. I can't believe he went for it. Now, what I'll tell you is I'm in talks to get rid of the Kmart stock.”

Ok, when?”

You own a considerable share. The difference is the stock is trading at sixteen and they want to give you fifteen and five eighths.”

What would the fifteen and five eighths give me?”

Hang on, let me get that paperwork because I've got the numbers for Logitech too.”


He got off the phone and then came back. “The Kmart, if you took what they offered you would be seven hundred and ten million.”


IF you took the sixteen, it'd be eight hundred and twenty five.”

Ok, so how much is the Logitech worth?”

Three hundred and thirty million.”

Ok, who wants it and are they offering what it's worth?”

They want to buy it back for themselves. They're offering what it's worth.”

Sell it to them, and get rid of the Kmart for what they're offering.”

Let me call him. It's Warren Buffett.”

Ok, tell them I need a check tomorrow afternoon. Now, can I release that half a billion and put it into this deal?”

I'd do it and run it through that savings and loan as it's assets.”

Ok, I'll do that, now who is going to sign that check?”

The guy there has discussed things with me and whomever you've spoken with is getting results real good.”

Ummm, I spoke with Dan about it and he spoke with someone.”

Ok, no bets with him, right?”

No, none of that.”

Good. Now do you really need me there for the owner's meeting?”

Yeah. I mean, they're going to find Danoza on Sunday and I've got no real link to the savings and loan part of it. IF they get to looking at that, I'm in some deep shit.”

You're covered.”


Ummm, you agreed to buy the assets of the savings and loan for the price you got the team for. It wasn't divulged to the press because they didn't want to disturb the other shareholders. Now the shareholder's have met and they've sold.”


You heard me. I can't go into it more than that. I'll tell you whoever is on that board heading it, and whom Dan spoke with is a master forger. I've seen the paperwork and it sure looks like everyone signed that agreement including you and Tom Benson as a witness at a later time.”

Tom didn't sign a sheet that I know of.”

He knows about it because I spoke with him.”

Ok, if it's legit, I'm not complaining. Now, what I want is to channel everything through the savings and loan. That includes all of my business and everything.”


It's not taxed. Me being owner of it, it's my assets, but it's not taxed as if I'm a corporation.”

Let me look into it.”

Trust me on this. The only way it could be is if it's got an S charter under the tax code and they went out in the thirties. Yes, I'm aware taxes didn't start until the forties, but they did that so S charters would change over to get into the FSLIC. It's protected by FSLIC, so I know it's not an S Charter corporation.”

Pretty good deductive reasoning.”

Well, tell Buffett and Logitech to put it through the savings and loan and I'll tell the man I'll mail him a check when I see the stocks. He'll have to produce them and I'll have the day tomorrow to have my end covered. It'll work good because I can buy twice or more what he can get. I should be up there in percentages.”

DO you want me to see if he has NBC stock he wants to come off?”

Yeah, but it's not my intention to take them over. It' just my intention to have a major percentage.”

Let me see. IF I can get the stock...and that's even if he has it...would you buy it?”

Find out what they're worth and while you're at it, see what my assets are in that savings and loan. I'm finding I've got stuff I didn't know I had.”

Hang on, I've got that paperwork right here.”


You own some Goodyear Rubber and Tire here.”

How much?”

Five hundred thousand shares.”

How much is it trading for?”

I have no clue.”

How would we find out tonight?”

Let me call him and see if he has some stock and see if he's interested in some Goodyear. It might be such a thing as you'd be able to trade it.”

Ok, if not, then you contact Walmart and take it to Sam. He's interested in them.”

Let me call you back.”

I'll be here whenever and how long it takes. Just call me back and let me know either way.”

Will do.”

I hung up.

Jan asked, “Hon, are you ok?”

Yeah, the savings and loan is mine legit. I bought it's assets. I own all of it, so I can do what I want with it. The cool thing is I can shove all my assets in it and not get taxed for profits and losses.”


Yeah, it's pretty smooth. I need to call Dan and thank him.”

We were nearing the stadium turn off.

I'm sorry I wasn't more into everything.”

We understand. Business is business and with how little you've spoken with him today, I'm surprised it's not more.”

It looks like I'm loosening up assets and can match him in the NBC acquisition. That's the good news. Now, what's amazing is there's a block of Goodyear stock in there which is five hundred thousand shares.

Even if it's a dollar a share, that's covered my investment into the savings and loan entirely. He's going to find out what it's trading for and get rid of my Kmart and Logitech stock. That will have me matching John's money from MCI/Worldcom/Sprint.”


IF I can unload the Goodyear, and if Warren Buffett has some NBC and is willing to trade it, then I very easily could be talking to that man tomorrow and buying that stock from him and without him knowing it, I'd have control of NBC.”


Yeah, the only hold up I would have is if the stock I'm buying through that President would be the Buffett stock. IF that's it, then I've paid double for the stock, or I've in effect set his stock into motion like I'm two bidders vying for the same stock.”

Oh! You'd have to tell Buffett up front what you're doing.”

Yeah, but the key is seeing what that Goodyear stock is worth. It'd be nice to just trade it for the NBC.”

What would you do with NBC?”

Honestly, I don't know. It wasn't my intention to take them over.”

How could you turn it?”

I know how I could turn it, but it's dependent upon whether that person is willing to buy it yet, or not.”

What's that mean?”

Bill Gates who has Microsoft ends up with a block of NBC stock by the late nineties. He does it and ends up having a financial channel named MSNBC. With that man's money, I'd gladly trade him my stock for shares in his company.”


He's about to release an operating system for computers which is going to revolutionize the way we look at computers.”

We've got some Microsoft programs now. I'm not real impressed.”

You will be when Windows 95 comes out.”


What happens is it begins the internet part of computing. It's not fast and it's a bit embarrassing at first, but it catches on and leads to him getting a near monopoly on programs.”

How would that help you?”

Here's how it helps. I've got ten percent of Apple and I'm on good terms with the owner. I've helped him in ways which is just way beyond how a stockholder helps an investment, but he's treated me good, so that's good.

The plus side of that is I could trade for shares in Microsoft. It'd probably be a huge chunk of their company, so that's good. So, I take it to Apple and offer him an equal number of shares of Apple for the Microsoft stock. He'd do it because they're going to sue Microsoft over patent infringement which Microsoft did, but managed to finagle their way out of it.

Now, imagine if you will the company suing you suddenly ends up with a large portion of your stock. Are you in a world of hurt?”

Oh man, yeah!”

Right, so it's used to intimidate and get things, however, what I'd be inclined to do if I was suing a company I suddenly own a lot of, is I'd drop that suit and smile while they made me huge money.”

Hmmm, that's shrewd.”

Yeah, it's saves legal fees and it saves headaches.”

My cell rang. “Hello?”

Here's what I've got. The Goodyear is trading for almost thirteen.”

Jeez, so I'm worth almost seven and a half billion with that!”

Amazing, isn't it.”

Yeah, now does he have NBC stock?”

Yeah, he owns twenty one percent.”

Ok, so what's he value it at?”

He said he's valuing it at four billion.”

He's wrong.”

Are you sure?”

I'm getting nearly twice that for one and a half. However, what does he say about buying the Kmart?”

He's going to do it.”

Good, now will Logitech have problems with the purchase of theirs?”

They said they've got that much. They're very interested in doing the buy back.”

Ok, now is Warren Buffett willing to buy the Goodyear?”

No, he thinks it way inflated.”

About as inflated as his opinion of NBC.”

I didn't say that, but I think it.”

How would I get Sam Walton's phone number?”

I got that. I'm not supposed to tell how I got it, but you know who I just talked with.”

Yeah. Do you want me to call him?”

IF you'd like.”

I'll call and let you know. We're about to switch vehicles, so I'll let you know here within half an hour.”

He might be in bed by then, he's not a spring chicken.”

Ok, give me the number.”

He gave me the number and I dialed it. A guy answered and his 'hello' was pronounced more like “Hay low?”

Ummm, I'm calling for Sam Walton, I must have the wrong number.”

This is he, how'd you get this number?”

Ummm, I can't say, but I do need to speak with you about a block of Goodyear stock I have.”

How much of it?”

Five hundred thousand shares.”

Who is this?”

Jake Martin. I bought a savings and loan and it's in my assets.”

Jake Martin, why's that name sound familiar?”

I own the Angels football team and play football. I was on Larry King and Letterman last night and I'll be on the Today show and Leno tomorrow.”


Why what?”

Why are you on them shows?”


Yeah, so don't lie to me.”

I played football on Sunday and afterward, they did the interview and showed my pecker on television. With me just buying the Angels and me being found out to be rich, they wanted me on television to put a face to the dick.”

He laughed, “You're right honest, aren't you.”

Well, that's the way I take it as to why they want to interview me.”

Probably would be that. I've never seen you play.”

I'm playing the Dallas Cowboys on Sunday.”

You'll lose.”

Care to make a bet on that?”

I don't bet.”

Me neither. I just like winning, so it'd make it funner when it happens.”

Do you play tennis?”


You beat my grandson.”

Probably, if I played him.”

You're 'the Hawk'. You do know when you hawk, it's spitting up snot, don't you?”

Well, that's true.”

SO you're snot.”

And you're trying to irk the best out of me. I'm trying to sell you stock to get you in position to put their tires in your stores, but as I see it, I could care less.”

Hold up a minute. Boy, you perturb easily.”

Well, you figure it out. If I said I name my shit, Sam, would you be pissed if I said you're shit?”

I'll tell you what, you keep that stock and I'll forget you called me.”

Oh, it's ok for you to call me snot, but you get pissed when I call you shit. Hmmm, I'll sell that stock and buy NBC like I planned. Then, let's see if I don't say Walmart can't advertise on NBC because the man likes to dish it out, but he just can't take it.”

You're buying NBC?”

Yeah, so, you'd do me a favor to buy the Goodyear so you can sell their tires in your stores which I know you will eventually, but I'll call Buffett back and tell him I'll tell him I can buy his shares of NBC at the inflated fuckin' figure he wants for it.”

How much does he want for his NBC?”

He wants four billion for twenty one percent. I'm buying twice that in the morning for less than half what he's got his priced at. I'll spend almost six billion to buy sixty percent of a company if I can seat their board.”

I'll tell you what. How much do you want the Goodyear for?”

It's trading at almost thirteen today. If you get me twelve and a half, you made money on the deal and I sure did.”

Seven and a half billion?”


You don't sound old enough to even hawk yet, much less shit. How can you have so much money?”

My grandma invested the money from my parents deaths very wisely. She got stock when it was low and bought whole blocks of it. For some reason she didn't buy yours, but I imagine that's because she went to Columbia Hickman and probably had an opinion of you.”

What's her name?”

Her married name was Rona Sherpa.”

Rona. A busty lady with a go to hell attitude?”

She was pin up material in her day, yeah.”

She didn't like me none much. But she sure went after your grandpa like he was flame for her cigar.”

Probably the other way around. I know she sure made him hot.”

He chuckled. “I knew them. Your grandpa did a tour through the war. He went through the military and then got himself into the mail corps.”


I knew them. SO you're their grandson, are you?”

Yeah, she raised me after my parents were killed.”

No wonder you've got the attitude you've got.”

Well we agree my grandma was hot. I just saw my Goodyear stock go up a quarter.”

What! You've got a stock ticker for them Japs or something?”

Yeah, but it's not the Japanese.”

Oh, well don't trust the Chinese, they don't do nothin' for you.”

I wish I could record you saying that.”


When you die, your kids damned near take everything you sell and have it made over there. Even the tires I'm selling you are going to be made over there.”

How do you know this?”

I read people. I can tell their past, present, and future.”

What's my favorite desert?”

If I said Moon Pie, I'd by lying.”

He laughed, “You sure got that right!”

Vanilla Ice Cream.”

You're right.”

You like the hand churned better than anything.”

Right again.”

You didn't want to run a store, but it's all that made you money. It fed the kids and it kept a roof over your head, so you did it.”

Right again.”

You love your wife. You love a good huntin' dog more, and you don't cotton much to a passel of kids.”

You got that right.”

You interested in buyin' this stock?”

Yeah, but I'm more interested in getting' you off the phone and finding out why Buffett gave you this phone number.”

Can I ask you a question?”


Why does he over inflate his stock so much?”

It's worth what you're willin' to pay. He's willin' to hold onto it to see if you can get control of that company some other way. IF you need his that bad, you'll pay it.”

He has no clue I'm buying forty percent in the morning.”

He doesn't?”


Then tell him he's full of shit like you did me and ask him when was the last time he buffed shit. You'll be telling him indirectly what I tell him and you'll be telling him I told him to knock it off. Then you tell him Rona was your grandma and see how fast he settles down. He actually did think she was worth chasin', but she was done caught.”

Ok, now...can I get his phone number from you?”

You talked with him, you have it!”

My lawyer talked with him. I got this number after he gave it to my lawyer.”

Why did you have your lawyer talk with him and you wanted to talk with me?”

Well, honestly, I know you're someone who owns something. He's someone who invests in a whole lot of something, so all he owns is paper. You can't walk in paper and buy a store, but you can walk in a store and buy a paper.”

He laughed, “Ok, I'll remember that. But just remember when you buy that paper from him, you're not buying a television. You're buying a company which makes televisions and radios.”

Really? I just thought they made tv shows.”

No son, they're RCA/Victor. You're buying the whole shootin' match. Now, do you want some advice?


I'll tell you who wants them bad. IF you buy up control under their noses, you're going to upset them something fierce. However, if you want to make some money, you turn around and sell that stock to GE.

They'll realize you've managed to buy what they've secretly wanted and you can ask for way more than you paid and what it's worth. To them, I'd buy that company for the six and tell them it's going to take ten to get it from me today and twenty when I offer it again tomorrow.”

Hmmm, that's a thought.”

Whatever you do, don't take that much stock from GE in a swap. I'll tell you now, you're not getting much of a company and you're not getting much ownership in one either. Their stock is so funny you think you're holding something and just when you think you're sure it's real, they split it into something else and tell you you're holding nothing. It's a mess because they do that.”

Ok, so take cash and that's it?”

Yeah, but why buy a company if you're not going to make it better?”

Honestly, I didn't intend on buying the company to take control of it. I just found out I've got a huge block of it cheap and very easily could take control of it. With the Goodyear stock, it means nothing to me, but I know it does to you.”

Why do you think that?”

Here's why. You're in the bargaining business, but speaking of bargaining, why is it you won't let my guys represent your companies in a commercial?”


My people called your company and asked to represent them in commercials and they politely said no. So, I figure you just don't want someone young representing your company who has a future ahead of him.”

Do you want that job?”

No, I've got too many endorsements. What I want is someone on my team endorsing you so I can get them signed to a contract for long term.”

What's your number?”

It's easy to remember. Area code 314 JMARTIN.”

How'd you get that?”

I own ten percent of my phone company. If you want, I'll get you your area code and SWALTON.”

Hmmm, that's a thought. You really own that much of the phone company?”

Yeah, but by all rights, I'm making more off them in other ways?”


Have you heard of cell phones?”

Yeah, but I've not gotten one yet.”

Well, in order for the cell phone to work, you gotta have cell phone antennas on towers. The phone company pays user fees for other people to invest in the towers. The way it goes is for a minute on a phone call that costs thirty eight cents. Out of that thirty eight cents, the owner of the tower gets a dime. The company gets a dime and the rest is taxes.”

That sounds about right.”

Well, figure that I own towers. So, I get a dime. Now, I also own ten percent of the company, so I get a penny of every phone call made.”

You're making a mint.”

Yeah, now just today, I traded a cable company for towers and rights to be in a whole lot of countries on a whole lot of continents.”

Which ones?”

Well, I own the rights of half of Australia, all of South America, and all of Africa. I've got a good portion of Europe since I'm over Russia and a lot of other countries. Right here, I'm in an investment group which has Colorado and the western side of Kansas, but I own towers in other portions of the country too, but those are on a lend and payback investment.”

What's that mean?”

Ok, lets say I call them and say, 'My friend Sam wants Waltonland which is over in the middle of China since that's where most of your goods will be made before long.

Anyways, they give you the rights to have towers in Waltonland, so at five thousand a piece, Waltonland gets covered with towers every fifteen square miles. So, let's say Waltonland has need to have a hundred and twenty cell phone towers, but you don't have the six hundred thousand it takes to cover Waltonland with towers.

Well, what I'd do is I'd tell you, 'Sam, you're a good friend, I've got plenty of money, so I'll buy the towers for you and let you pay me back when you make that money from them.”

That's good, how much interest?”

A lot of people are getting interested in cell phones, but I'm not selling them to you yet.”

NO, I mean how much interest on the money you lent me?”

None, you're a friend.”

Ok, you're a friend, so put the towers up, now how much pay back time on them?”

Four months. By a year, you're making huge windfalls of money.”

How much?”

About a hundred times your investment for that town.”


Yeah, but that's per month. I know a guy who's making five hundred thousand a month from fifty towers.”

Oh man, how can I get into that?”

You can't. I just locked it up today.”

Oh man, you went whole hog and now you're going to make a fortune!”

Sam, I invested eight hundred million in the things. Now, tell me I make that back in four months and by the end of a year, I'm making a hundred times that per month, am I going to be stinking rich?”

You're going to have money rolling in faster than me!”

Yeah, but if you'd paid attention, I'm about caught up to you in net worth now.”


Yeah, but like you, I don't see myself as being rich. I remember my friends and I've shared the wealth. They're getting rich off the things too and I lent them the money to get their towers.

Now, do you want to make money on cell phones?”


Sell them in your electronics section. The mark up on the things is absolutely incredible. One of them costs less than four dollars and you sell it for sixty dollars. Plus, the models change fast enough that you're happy and there's a good variety of makes and models.”

How do I get into those?”

Let me have John call you. He's president of our company and from what I heard, when he called you guys, he couldn't get any attention. Yeah, he was a lot smaller then, but now I'm in the company and I'm going all around the world for about forty percent coverage of it.”

You're going to do amazing with them.”

Do you want to know the kicker?”

What's that?”

Where those towers are in the lesser known parts of the world is where I can start cable television companies. Just think, soon, I'll have little parts of Africa, Australia, and Brasil watching American television seeing your ads which don't have my guys in them.”

I'll have my boy call you about that.”

Fifteen year contracts. That's all I'm taking on that.”


Because fifteen years locks you into it and it locks me into it. You get a spokesman who the customers know and trust and my player gets assured he's going to make money for that long.”

That's pretty smart, but will a company really go for that long?”

Here's who I represent and that's really why I can't represent you. I've got endorsements for Nestle, General Motors, PepsiCo, Burger King, and Stein Brewing. In those contracts, I represent all their divisions and each is treated as a separate contract in the one contract.”

Slow that down and bring it by me again.”

Ok, here's how it goes. Look at General Motors. They've got Buick, Cadillac, Chevrolet, GMC, Olds, Pontiac, and Saturn. So, it's one contract, but I get paid seven different checks. It's the same with Stein Brewing. They've got Stein, Stein Light, Mountain Ale, and all their other divisions.”

And each one pays you a check?”

Yeah, I make a commercial for each one and they pay me. It's pretty neat because I'm charging them a whole lot.”

How much?”

For me, it's fifteen million a year per brand. The GM is worth a hundred and five million a year. Stein is worth about that much. Burger King is worth twenty million a year, Nestle is worth fifteen million, and PepsiCo is worth huge money because I'm selling for each of their brands of soda, but I'm also selling for their fast food and their snacks.”

Oh goodness! You're covering a bit of territory.”

Yeah, but just wait because here's what's neat about them. We do what we call 'film on the fly' which means I have a camera man with me wherever I go and I find some really good locations. Today, I filmed nine commercials and all of them were done in one take.”

They're going to look like crap.”

On Friday night, you're going to start seeing the Stein commercial I filmed.”


That's why we film on the fly. It gets a commercial submitted to the networks super fast. Within a week, they're on the air.”

You say they're good, now are they really?”

I've shown them to people who give me their honest opinion. I showed all nine of them to an old lady and she told me the Stein commercial was my best, but one of the Burger King commercials wasn't very good because the people who were in it with me who worked there spoke too fast when they said their names and their positions. That might be, but when I'm making a new commercial a week, that commercial is only going to run for a week and then it's history.”

You're doing that fast of a turn around?”

Yeah, but I'm lucky because I can think of them fast.”

Ok, do me a commercial for Wal-Mart.”

Hi, My name is Jake Martin and I'm with the Angels football team. Walmart has asked me to tell you my opinion of their stores.

The other day I went into Wal-Mart for Old Roy dog food. While I was in there, I saw they were selling Goodyear tires.

Now I'll tell you I'd not really paid attention to all the brands they sold until that moment, but I started to on my way out and I realized they've got names you know and trust at prices which make me really want to shop their more often. Go in and give them a shot. I bet you'll see what I saw at prices which will impress you too.”

This is where it cuts and you slam your logo across the bottom with pictures of brands you sell all over the screen. But the one thing which sticks in the customer's mind from watching it was I was serious, looked them in the eye, and told them the truth they already know. I didn't lose my smile and I genuinely looked happy to be telling them what I learned during my trip there, but if you notice, I mentioned your brand of dog food which told them I went there for value.”

You sure did! That was slick.”

And I did it first. When you do that, it sticks in their mind because I wasn't jumping up and down and yelling like the house was on fire. I was serious, introduced myself, and made the presentation so they got to know me and know I am someone who will put my name out there to support something I believe in. I did that and I do it in my ads because I want to be low key and have believability in all my ads.”

And you're doing it in such a way it's making the companies who hire you get attention.”

And me lots of money.”

You know, Walter Cronkite told the news like that. People believed him and when he said something, you just knew it was the truth.”

Right, but I've also been told my selling style is like Paul Harvey.”

True. And people believe him.”

Well, that's how I do it. And you see how fast I make something up.”

You're good.”

Most of my guys are learning from me. We do a walk through commercial which means when we sell you a car, we drive that car, or we walk you around it, in it, and show you things about it which make you think you just had the dealer come into your home and show you that car. I did that today with the Buick Roadmaster but when I sold a Chevy Suburban, I did it different.”

How's that?”

It was raining and night time. Now, what's two things you don't see in a commercial? Rain and night time, but you do have rain and you do have night time when you drive.

The way we did it was we put the camera up under an awning at a grocery store. The neon showed on the wet truck and then I got out and walked up towards the camera like I was talking to someone I wanted to know about the truck. I gave information and something which is going to make everyone be shocked and laugh.”

Really? What's that?”

You obviously didn't see my interview after the football game last week. Well, they showed my tallywhacker. I'll tell you now, the general consensus across the nation is everyone thinks I'm blessed down there. I'll tell you it's not the size of the thing which makes me a man, but what's in my heart.”


So, in the commercial, I listed a bunch of things I'm not. I'm not in California, I'm not blonde, and I'm not in a convertible. Then, I switched it and said, “You don't have to be blonde, beautiful, and hung to buy this truck, you've got to care about your family. This truck has antilock brakes for when it rains and if it snows, it comes with four wheel drive.

Well, I go on and on about it, but what's going to stick in people's mind is I said you don't have to be hung when they full well know I've got more than most.”

He laughed, “You said that in a truck commercial!”

Yeah, so people are going to hear it and guess what, they're going to call their buddy and they're going to tell their buddy I just said the word in the commercial and people are going to watch it again and pay attention to what I say the next time. Now, when you do that, it's meant to shock, but the overall thing is they're suddenly paying attention to what I say about that truck. It's suddenly the commercial they're paying attention to instead of the show.”

You're right!”

Yeah, so the way it goes is they pay attention to what I say in other commercials whether it be a Pizza Hut commercial, or a Nestle commercial. Now, I'll let this die down and sometime in February, I'll say something about a Taco Bell burrito as being a nice big one which you can put your lips around.”

That's throwing a bit of sex into it, but clean.”


Why'd they show your privates on television?”

Here's the way it went. Innocently, I allowed a camera crew in to do an post game interview. I told them I was going to get naked and I took off my tights. I hung them up and they asked why I wore them. I told them and then the announcer looked down and asked me if it was for real. Needless to say, the cameraman looked down and showed it to the world. Because they were live, they didn't shut it down in time.

Now what happened from that, was I guess heart attacks happened in New York at NBC because they're afraid I would sue.”

You could've.”

Yeah, but to be honest, I sort of chuckled and thought of how many people would suddenly start watching me play football because of a dumb move. I thought it'd improve my popularity, but at the same time, I realize people make mistakes.”


So, they sent down a vice president to seek forgiveness and that's really when I was upset.”


Here's why Sam. Ok, let's say Wal-Mart makes a mistake and embarrasses someone on national television.

Are you going to send a vice president of a division to do your job, or are you going to go apologize yourself? I know as owner of my team, if one of my players does something like that, I'm going to go apologize on behalf of the team while I've got that player by the arm making him apologize too.

The way I felt was if the big shots are having heart attacks, then they need to be there seeing I thought it wasn't anything. That's the way I still feel about it, but I'll tell you I did seek publicity over it and got Saturday Night Live, Leno, and the Today show, but I also got Letterman, and Larry King. So, I'm doing them and I'm making my face be known so I'm not a total unknown when I start having ads out there.”

You did good.”


DO you really think you can beat the Cowboys?”

Yeah. We're going to do it.”

They're awfully good.”

Let me say something and then you're going to be more amazed. Our team isn't a bunch of pro players. I bought the team on Saturday and came in here and fired most of the pros.

In a pinch, I called my high school coach and had him get my team from high school to play. He brought the ones who could get parental permission, and we beat the Tampa Bay Buccaneers. So, not only do I think I can beat the Cowboys, but I can do it with a high school team.”

And you already beat a pro team?”

Yeah, but here's what you don't know. Ok?

When we go out there, we can't technically take a pay check for playing and stay an amateur on the high school level, so what I did was forgot to have them sign contracts and paid their parents the sixty grand each for them giving up their family time on Sunday. Now you know and I know where that money's going, but to the league, it's within the law and there's nothing they can do.”

That's smooth, I like that.”

Now, as a pro player, I can't tell my players I'll give them ten grand to hurt anyone. It's bad sportsmanship, but it's also unethical. However, since we're not pros, I can tell the team if they knock their guy on his butt, I'll treat everyone to a Big Mac. Now, if they get a touch down, I'll get everyone a tank of gas. However, if they get the quarterback, I'm getting them their own pizza at Pizza Hut.”

That's good, it not saying to get any certain player, but it's rewarding a positive action. That's good, I like that.”

Yeah, so we're doing it and we're having fun with it. Here's what I mean. On Sunday, it's Halloween. I'm dressing up as a pumpkin and I'm going out in a pumpkin costume with orange tights on and a little green hat.

Now, what I normally do when they introduce me is I go out and I do flips all the way down to the other end of the field and I throw the football back up the field through the goal posts.

This time, I'm coming out dressed as a pumpkin and I'm doing those flips and then I'm throwing a pumpkin up the field and through those goal posts.”

You throw three hundred yards!”


Jeez kid, you've got an arm!”

That's what they say, but anyone could do that, but are they accurate? On Letterman, I threw a football five hundred and twelve feet through the window on a taxicab. Now, that's pretty accurate.”

Five hundred and twelve feet, that's incredible!”

Yeah, but it'd be just so so if I threw it and hit the cab. What's incredible is the window opening which you know as well as I, told everyone I'm a whole lot better than they give a high school player credit to be.”


SO, that's why I bought the team. I didn't figure I'd get a scout to come see me in Moberly, Missouri, so I bought a team to be sure I got a chance to play pro ball.”

And you bought the Angels?”

Yeah, they were the ones which were for sale.”

Where are they from?”

Akron, Ohio.”

No one's from Akron, you ought to move the team.”

No, they love us here. I'm getting given the key to the city on Thursday from the mayor. Now, to me, that's pretty special. It says the city is behind us and it says they're behind us when we stink...not only when we win.”

Did they offer you that before you won?”

Yeah, and I'll tell you the team of guys I fired were lousy. Not just as a team, but human beings. They didn't pay their bills, they didn't keep their word on their contracts, and they didn't respect their coaches, or their owner.”

So you fired a whole team?”

I kept twelve people. They got kept because they paid their bills, and they weren't running all over the owner.”

What were they doing?”

Ok, lets say I offer you a six million dollar contract. Now that contract is full of bonuses, but basicly put, it tells you if you attend team meetings and practice...on Sunday, you'll get to play. For that, you'll be paid sixty thousand for that week. IF you don't get to play, you're still going to get thirty five thousand just to be there.”

That's quite a bit.”

That's average pay for a pro. For a teenager, that's huge pay, but I want them to think they're pros, so I pay them like pros.”

Smart thinking.”

However, they're teenagers. IF I practice them too hard, they're going to be upset. So, to get performance, I have enticements like free Big Mac's and so on and so forth.

Well, the way it went was this guy who owned the team had them on contract. He had them making that much and then, he'd go out off the contract and co-sign a new car and a new house with the player. The player would then go out and blow the money, so the owner ended up paying for the car and the house as well as food for the guy and his family...aunts, uncles, cousins, and whomever.”

You gotta be kiddin' me!”

No, our food bill was astronomical. And, get this because I'm not done...most of these guys didn't pay their own utility bills and this guy was paying that too.”

What were they doing with the money?”

From the nearest that I can figure, they were keeping the bars here thriving.”

Oh man!”

Now, what you have is me buying the team. I call and tell the coach I bought it and I'm on my way and I want the team to be kind enough to meet me out there at the airport and then we'll go have a team meeting and practice some.”

“Ok, that sounds reasonable.”

'Yeah, but you forgot I had a bunch of guys who didn't care a thing about anything or anyone but themselves. SO, they didn't show at the airport and I sort of shrug and think they must've been told the wrong time.

What they were told by the coach was the team had gotten sold and they weren't being paid for the team meeting or the practice which it states in the contract they have to be paid for it.

SO, I go and no one's at the meeting. I'll tell you I hit the roof! I told the manager to get them and tell them the team meeting suddenly became about them being suspended and if they didn't show for practice, they were fired.

Well, he came back down and told me they said for me to get fucked because I wasn't paying them. Needless to say, I called the practice and practiced who I had. They kept their jobs and then I had the guys called and told to be at the stadium or I'd start repo-ing everything I was paying for from their wive's wedding rings to the cars, to the houses and as of Monday morning, the utilities would be shut off.”

That should've gotten some action.”

Yeah, it did. They came in and I went through their contract and showed them where it said I could suspend for the missed team meeting and fire without notice for the second missed team activity which was the practice they missed.

Then I went through the books and showed them where I was paying for their vehicles and where I was paying for the houses and everything else. Now, they could either attempt to sue me or they could pay full value for the houses and everything and be welcome to walk.”

What'd they do?”

They gave everything back. And, they now think I'm not going to the owner's meeting and seeking damages to which they'll be liable for before they receive a paycheck with the new team who hires them.”

Why are you doing that?”

Because I'm not going to have leave my payroll for insubordination and find out next week, I'm playing them when they're still costing me money.”

How's that?”

My team's reputation is on the line. I could let the houses go back to the bank who lent to the guy because the team was co-signing it. It stinks because A: It gets the bankers thinking my team is a bunch of bums. And B:, it makes it hard on the people I do have to get loans when they pay their bills. And C: It leaves me owing the leftover amounts on those things to the bank when the bank can't collect the full amount, so therefore I end up having to pay for a house I don't have anymore.”

Jan waved at me and started her Mercedes. I said, “Sam, I gotta go. Some people who matter to me are getting rambunctious.”

When do you want to make that transaction?”

I'll be in Moberly tomorrow afternoon to practice. That's sorta halfway if you wanna do it.”

I'll be there.”

Sam, may I ask ahead of time to have a personal photo taken with you?”

Sure, that'd be fine. I'll want one myself of the youngest billionaire I know.”

I chuckled, “It seems weird when I try thinking about how many dollars that is.”

Think about it this way. One billion dollar bills put end to end would go around the earth three times.”

Hmmm, I never thought about it that way. That's pretty neat.”

I'll see you tomorrow Jake.”

Bye Sam.”

I rang off and went over to Jan's car. “I'm sorry for taking so long.”

NO, I understand. Did you get that done with him?”

He's going to meet me in Moberly to conduct the business. I'll need to have that stock there.”

I'll go over and get it from them.”

Ok, you two have a good evening.”

Remember you've got Ren here.”

I've got two more calls to make. One is to get that NBC stock from Buffett cheaper and the other is to Mike to tell him I got everything done. Now, do you want to see what I'm going to try pulling off?”

What's that?”

I'm going to try having Buffett and Sam both watch us practice. It'd not only be cool having that many billionaires in one place, but it'd be neat thinking them two old dudes would probably bet a dollar on me like that one move Eddie Murphy is in.”

She laughed, “You're a nut. I'll see you tomorrow.”

By you two. Love yas.”

We love you too.”

I walked over to Ren and asked, “Can you drive a car?”

Yeah, but not one so big.”

Here's the keys. I've got two more calls to make and then I'm shutting off the phone.”

That's ok, I know you're busy.”

No, I want you to know you matter more.”

Thank you.”

And, I want to hug and kiss you while undressing you.”

He smiled. “You want?”

Yes, very much.”

We got in the vette and he started it and revved it really high when it started. When we backed out, he goosed it and burned a little rubber. He hit the brake and then eased slower. He looked at me and said, “Very powerful.”

Yeah, big motor.”

Goes fast then.”


We went forward and then I pointed how we had to go. We drove that direction and it wasn't long before he had it down and was at the Mansion. We got out and I dialed Buffett.


Mr Buffett, this is Jake Martin.”

Hi, I just spoke with Sam Walton about you and he wasn't very happy.”

He should've been, he made a hundred and twenty five thousand off me.”


I sold him my five hundred thousand shares of Goodyear for twelve fifty. Now, do we deal for that NBC stock, or not?”

HE told me to give it to you for what you knew it was worth. He said you got the privilege of calling him shit more than anyone alive.”

Well he called me a hawk.”

A what?”

I beat his grandson on the tennis court. My nickname out there on the court was 'the Hawk'. So, he told me a hawk was something he did when he coughed up phloem. Well, that irked me so I told him Sam was what I called my shit. Needless to say, he wanted to dish it out, but couldn't take it. We got through it, but it wasn't nice.”

You're meeting him in Moberly tomorrow to get that money and stock, right?”

Yeah, do you wanna meet there?”

I think it'd be neat having that many billionaires in one place. It'd be two old ones and a young one. Now, if I could get Bill Gates to be there, it'd be two old and two young.”

That'd be way cool. I doubt if he'd want to do it since I would have a master plan to finagle some of his stock away from him in order to give it to Apple.”

Why would you do that?”

I own ten percent of Apple. Steve's been nothing but nice to me and Bill's going to steal something from him. Steve sues Bill and it's a financial mess in which Steve loses, but Bill did do it.”


It'd change things tremendously if I owned a large part of Microsoft and decided to trade it to Steve for more of his company. Then he'd not sue because his financial interests would be in seeing Microsoft profit.”

That'd be pretty smooth. Is that why you're buying this stock?”

Are you going to sell it to me where I don't have to kill the family cow to get it?”

Two billion is the lowest I'll go.”

Ok, but I still know you're clawing my eyes out on it.”

How so?”

IF I told you, you'd hang onto that stock quicker than anything.”

You must be planning a take over.”

Now, you're making me show my hand before I even say a thing.”

Don't play chess with me, I'd win.”

Hmmm, we'll have to do it when we've got time. Lord knows when that'd be with my schedule.”

You busy?”

I'm just getting home. My morning starts too early and then it's running around like a chicken with it's head cut off.”

That's my day every day. You'll get used to it.”

It has to suck to schedule making love.”

Do that every day while you're young. When you get to be my age, you'll realize you just don't get it as often as you can even would want.”

I don't get it that much now! I guess I'll have to!”

He chuckled, “I'll find out what the stock is worth tomorrow and sell it for what it's worth. Now, I want a promise from you that you'll sell me stock at the same way.”

Yeah, that's only fair.”

Ok, we've got a deal. Now, are you taking over them?”

Yeah, but I don't know why. I guess it's just me learning to flex my muscles using money.

They're selling me a bunch of stock at a reasonable price and I'm buying it. Then I realized if I had a little more, I'd control the company, so that's what caused me to want yours.”

Keep it and control them by deciding if you actually like what they're putting out each season. If you do that, you'll have a good network.”

I'll hang onto it. It might be fun.”

If you do, my suggestion is to go up and see Rockefeller Center and realize that building and that skating rink are yours...and when they put up that Christmas tree, you made the world a lot brighter.”

Cool, I never thought about that! I'd own something which everyone knew and liked!”

Yeah, now how much are you getting that other block of stock?”

Forty percent for two billion. That's nearly twice what you're giving me for the same amount.”

You must be getting it from someone who is selling from the company's reserves. He's getting it to you for the discounted price because it's not supposed to be traded.”

Is it illegal?”

No, it's just not good.”

Ok, I'll remember that when I'm dealing with the man. I'm already less than impressed with him.”

How come?”

He sent a Vice President down to apologize to me when it should have been him.”

That deal with them showing you nude?”

Yeah, did you see it?”

I heard about it and then saw a tape. It was a very well played game.”

You'll get to meet the team tomorrow if you show up there.”

I'll be there. Could I get a jersey signed?”

Yeah, I'll get you one of mine, but just remember I've got to go pay respects to a fan of mine.”


There in Moberly. He watched the game and had a congenital heart defect. He died afterward. It makes me proud to know he and his family spent time cheering me during his last moments.”

How about all of us riding over and paying respects. I don't know them, but it sounds like you like them.”

I do, now if I disappear for a moment, please don't be alarmed. I'm going to be in there with the undertaker paying for his funeral.”


The family is having financial hardship. I got them jobs, but we've got to get them moved to Akron.”

I'll get the mover. I own one of those companies.”

Ok, that'd be nice.”

I'll tell Sam to come up off a nice gift card for them so they've got a nice new start.”

That'd be nice. Thanks for thinking of it.”

It doesn't mean anything to him, but it'd mean the world to them.”

You're right. Now, can I ask a question?”


I'm having my team find endorsements for players. Some companies don't want to deal with us. Would you see what companies you've got and sort of put some pressure on them to have us endorse them?”


First of all, it's going to make your companies look good. Second of all, it helps the player because he feels better knowing he's making decent money. It helps me because a good player feeling great is going to really be a strong contender.”

But I'd get nothing out of it.”

Yeah you would. Better ads make more sales. More sales mean your stock goes up and that means you are worth more.”

I'll get a list together and give you names of people who to talk with.”


Jake, beat the Dallas team. Sam thinks you're full of hot air, but I know you've got the talent to do it.”

We're going to get it done. Don't have any worries.”

Good, now I'll get off here and I'll see you tomorrow.”


No, thank you.”

I hung up and said, “Ren, one more and then I'm done.”

By then, we were going up in the elevator. He smiled, “Did you get it?”

Yeah, at a fair price.”


I called Mike. “Hello?”

Sorry it took so long but they talk forever.”

How'd it go?”

I'm selling the Goodyear to Sam for twelve fifty a share. I'm picking up the NBC from Buffett at going price tomorrow. Both of them are meeting me at the football field, so I'll need to have you there to write Warren a check and to take a big check from Sam.”

You do realize you're going to hand me about ten billion dollars worth of stuff in total, right?”

Yeah, two pieces of paper. A check and a stock certificate. Both could be folded up and put in your shirt pocket. So?”

You speak about it like it doesn't mean anything, but doesn't that tell you how rich you are?”

Cool, but think about this and then you can see what Sam just showed me. IF you put a billion dollars end to end around the Earth, it'd go three times. That's not even a foot wide ribbon of money. So, ten billion would be a two and a half foot long ribbon of money. That's cool, but my two feet end to end are that long. That's not very much.”

He chuckled, “When you put it that way, it isn't.”

An inspiration suddenly occurred to me, Cool, I could buy everyone a Whopper meal! Now wouldn't that just boost their sales!”

He laughed, “I like how you look at it.”

That's the first ten billion Mike. From here on out, it'll get tougher.”

Why do you think that?”

This one was me maximizing everything I had for assets. The next ones are going to have to count on the cell towers.”

Can I give you advice?”


Trade the stock for stock in something you know is going to really make money. As soon as word hits you're doing a take over, it's liable to go down.”


You're an outsider who doesn't know the business. It always goes down when word gets over about those sorts of take overs.”

Ok, let me think about that and I'll find something which goes way up.”

You mentioned Microsoft goes way up?”

Yeah, but owning this, I can walk into Rockefeller Center and say I own control of the company. Walking into Microsoft wouldn't be nearly as impressive.”

You're right there.”

Now, if you said we could throw the assets of this company into buying a bank like Chase or Citibank, that'd be cool.”

How about a bunch of smaller ones.”

Under Citibank's name. I know that's tricky because Angel would own it, but that's what I'd go with.”

Do you want to start leveraging it?”

See what the assets are worth now and what my net worth is worth and start using the income from the cell towers to start buying little banking companies and putting them under the Angel umbrella.”

What else?”

Drug companies. Get ones like Bayer and those. People are getting older and need more drugs. Also, look at Disney and see how much I can grab there. They're going to have a string of very good years.”

I'll get on that.”

Thanks Mike.”

Can I have my family out there to shake hands with them?”

Yeah, but don't tell everyone who is going to be there. They're going to be going down to the funeral home with me to pay respects to the Turlock boy.”


Yeah, they've got big hearts. I told them about him and they're going to do some good things for the family.”

I'm not familiar with the Turlock family. What happened?”

He watched us play, with his family, and a congenital heart thing had him dead within a day. It's pretty upsetting, but they're handling it well.”

Ok, let me know if I can do anything for them.”

I will. It's pretty well taken care of.”

Ok, Good night Jake.”

Good night Mike.”

Play Maker


Notes From Retta:

I realize the story has gotten off on a different foot than I intended. It gets back real fast, so please understand it's needed to develop the characters.

What's different is this story isn't like my others where there's a plot and a lot of things thrown in. With this one, it's teaching and showing a way of life which the sports stars have and how it's lived.

From My Keyboard To Your Heart,


Copyright Notice - Copyright © 2008 by RettaMichaels

The author, RettaMichaels copyrights this story and retains all rights. This work may not be edited, changed, or duplicated in any form, media [ known or unknown ], without the author's expressed permission. All applicable copyright laws apply. RettaMichaels does NOT give editorial consent in order for this to be published. If it is deemed unpublishable in it's context, permission much be granted before publication or changes occur.

Trademark Notice – 2008 by RettaMichaels

From My Keyboard To Your Heart”,”'Retta”,“RettaMichaels”.“Retta”,“Rhett”, and “Rhette” are all Trademark of RettaVonnMichaels L.L.C. None of these trademarks may be used, or authorized without consent.

Disclaimer: All individuals depicted are fictional, and any resemblance to real persons, locations, or incidents is purely coincidental.