Date: Wed, 6 Jan 1999 21:20:12 -0700 From: Patrick Fitzgerald Subject: "BOUND FOR GLORY" {Patrick Fitzgerald}( b/M,nc/con,bnd,o,a ) Shortly after Dave's divorce he bought a condominium in an expensive com- plex. While he knew he should get back into the single's scene, it just seemed to be too much trouble. Instead, he threw himself into his work as a pharmaceutical salesman, read to keep up-to-date in biochemistry, the field in which he had his degree, and spent some time at the pool in the condo recreation area. Sandy and Doug, his next door neighbors saw him the first evening he walked into the fenced pool area and they insisted that he join them for hamburgers they were barbecuing on one of the gas grills. It didn't take long for Dave to become friendly with the couple. He loved to travel but could seldom afford it so he enjoyed the stories Doug and Sandy told of their frequent trips all over the world. Doug was an execu- tive for a large airline so they traveled at little cost. In addition to the free airline tickets, the hotels let them stay for almost nothing in hopes that the airline would recommend their accommodations to the passeng- ers. Doug was interested in a few prescription drugs that he couldn't get a doctor to prescribe. They were relatively innocuous - thyroid hormone, sublingual dimethyl testosterone and a memory enhancing drug. Dave got samples and gave them to Doug who was extremely grateful. In return, he got Dave first class tickets to Europe at a very substantial discount. It was Dave's best vacation, ever. Sandy's twelve year old son, Gary, by a former marriage was always around but usually ignored by his mother and stepfather. Although he was in class- es for gifted children and taking an Introductory Philosophy extension course from a local university, they gave him no affection or encouragement. Dave liked the boy, and noted that he was quite good looking with dark blond wavy hair, blue eyes, a clear, smooth, well tanned skin, long lean legs, a good body and a handsome face. Dave didn't think all these things con- sciously or separately because he wasn't particularly interested in kids. However, he was sensitive to the lack of attention Gary got from his parents and tried to compensate a bit by talking with the boy and listening to him. Gary's intelligence and Dave's minor in Philosophy made it easier for them to converse. Gary, on the other hand was keenly aware of Dave. He loved listening to him when Dave talked with his parents, loved watching him when he was at the pool, and loved thinking about him when he was absent. Gary could see Dave's thirty-five year old, five foot ten frame, sandy hair, hazel eyes, and lean body in his mind whenever he closed his eyes. Dave had invited Sandy and Doug out to dinner since he wouldn't see them for the next three weeks. They were leaving the following morning for a tour of Hong Kong, Shanghai, then on to India and Pakistan. When he knocked at their door to get them, Doug answered, "Hi Dave, come on in. We're going crazy trying to line up a substitute baby-sitter for Gary for the three weeks. The woman we had hired just called and said she had a family emergency and couldn't be here." "Well, that's the last of the agencies. No one is available on such short notice. He's too young to leave by himself for three weeks. I just don't know what to do," Sandy said as she came from the telephone. "Dave could take care of me," piped up Gary. Doug said, "Don't be silly, Gary. Dave works during the day, and he has a life in the evenings." Dave didn't care too much for the idea either, so he kept quiet. "Well, it's summer vacation so, during the day while he's at work, I could stay here and read or watch television or I could go to the pool. He could just check on me every so often and take me to the store every few days for milk and food. He wouldn't have to be really tied down. And if he were going out, he could hire the regular evening baby-sitter you get when you go out sometimes. He could keep a list of everything he paid and you could pay him back after your trip." When Gary covered all these bases, it didn't sound quite so impossible. "I really hate to impose, Dave, but we are pretty desperate. If you could see your way clear to helping us out, I'd make sure you got free first class round trip tickets to anywhere in the world that my airline flies. I'd also get you the airline discount for hotels and restaurants. If it sounds like a bribe, that's what it is, but we're at our wit's end." Doug looked plead- ingly at Dave. "What the hell? That's what friends are for. You've made me feel welcome ever since I moved in here. It's the least I could do, it's only three weeks, and the spare bedroom has a bed in it that's never been used. Let's go eat, and you can lecture me on all the skills a baby-sitter has to have." Dave was resigned, Sandy and Doug were overtly overjoyed, and Gary was quietly the happiest of all. At about 4:30 A.M. on Friday morning the Airport Van brought Sandy and Doug to O'Hare International Airport and they left. Gary came to Dave's door at 7:30 for breakfast as they had instructed him. As Dave got ready to leave for work, he said, "Here's a key for my front door so you can get in here if you want, Gary. I have to take a hospital administrator to lunch. Since he likes long wet ones, especially during a hot day like we're supposed to have today, I'll probably come home and sleep off the alcohol right after I drop him off. I'll see you some time around 3:00." When Dave arrived home at 3:20, Gary was watching television in Dave's living room. "Hi Gary. Man, can that guy drink. I'm completely smashed and I skipped a few reorders so I didn't even keep up with him. I'll be up in an hour or two and make us dinner. Jesus, it's hot. I should have shown you how to turn on the air conditioning." "OK Dave, I'll be watching television. I took a shower a little while ago. I hope that's OK." Dave said it was. Dave went upstairs to his bedroom, closed the door, stripped, quickly rinsed off in the shower and flopped down on his bed. He was deep asleep in only a few minutes. An hour later he woke up because he felt restricted. "What the hell's going on?" As he opened his eyes, he saw Gary standing by the side of the bed. Dave was spread-eagled with ropes from the four bedposts tied tightly around his wrists and ankles. He struggled for a few moments then said, "Gary, that's not funny. Untie me right now." Instead of doing that, Gary reached over and put a wide strip of duct tape over Dave's mouth. "Dave, I've loved you almost from the day you moved here, and I knew I'd never get you to do anything so I had to do this. I want to make love to you so much." Gary was wearing only shorts and a tee shirt. He pulled the shirt over his head, then lowered his shorts and stepped out of them. Dave angrily watched the boy, but a tiny shard of another emotion flicked across his consciousness when he looked at Gary's beautiful little naked body. Gary crawled up, lay down beside Dave and snuggled close to him. "Oh Dave, I love the feel of your strong body and the smell of you. You've been so nice to me, you really listen when I talk with you, and you don't criticize what I say, without even thinking, the way my parents do." Dave grunted. Had he been able to speak, he would have said, "The smell is just the alcohol exuding from my pores, and I was only treating you the way I treat everyone." He tried to move away from Gary, but there was an under- lying pleasure at the intimacy of feeling the boy's smooth cool skin against him. The ropes effectively prevented him from escaping. Gary began to kiss Dave's chest and stroke him. Slowly he moved towards the man's nipples and caressed them with his tongue. Long before Dave was aware of his anger and frustration being very slightly suffused with arousal and anticipation, his organs began to respond. He was breathing deeply, gener- ating a bit more saliva, his hips had rotated a few degrees so he was more accessible, and the venous valves in his genitalia had started to close. The boy's little fingers slid lightly along Dave's arms, his chest, down to his stomach. Gary moved down so he could kiss the area around the man's navel and his fingers reached farther to pet Dave's thighs. By now, even Dave realized that he had an erection, not too firm, but quite definitely there. "Shit, I'm being raped by a twelve year old boy, and I'm getting aroused. That's sick," but the more he fought against the emotions, the stronger they got. Gary moved around and climbed over Dave so he was straddling him. Gary bent forward so his mouth was just above the deep red, shiny, swollen head of Dave's penis. The boy was on his knees with his ankles resting on the man's shoulders. Dave looked down and saw two long, lean, smooth legs leading up to a nicely shaped pair of globes. Along the center of symmetry he saw a tightly puckered little orifice. He couldn't help but recall how much he'd always wanted to try an anal connection and how strongly the four women he'd slept with in his life had refused to even consider it. As his eyes moved farther down, he saw Gary's small sack holding his testes and below that, the boy's beautiful, pink, hard little shaft. Dave was sud- denly aware that he had just used the word "beautiful" to describe Gary's penis. "What's wrong with me?" he thought, but he couldn't stop his eyes from sweeping up and down this vertical line between the boy's anus and his glans. Gary had begun stroking Dave's penis so softly with his fingers that the man wasn't even aware of it at first. "Oh, this kid does have great technique, even if it is all perverted." At the moment Gary opened his mouth and enveloped Dave's penis, Dave was staring at the boy's anal opening. Suddenly, the intense stimulation was joined by a thought, no, a strong desire to be sliding deep into Gary's anus. Dave's arousal was quickly short-circuiting his inhibitions and rational thought so he didn't even try to drive this idea from his con- sciousness. Gary caressed Dave's penis lovingly with his tongue and lips. He kissed the head of it, slid the tip of his tongue along the slit and down and around the crown. Again, he plunged it into his mouth and began to suck very hard as he continued rubbing it with his tongue and the roof of his mouth. At the same time he had wrapped his fingers tightly around the base of Dave's shaft and held the foreskin stretched tightly back. Each time he moved his head up and down, he drove Dave's penis a little deeper into his mouth and finally a little way down his throat. Dave's resistance to being stimulated and his attempt to prevent an orgasm just drove him to a higher plateau of stimulation before he exploded into the boy's mouth. Until now, Dave had thought orgasms were nice and pleas- antly releasing. This one, however, was a completely different phenomenon. He was filled with so much joy that he instantly knew he loved Gary and never wanted him to stop doing this. While this attitude would be severely tempered when he came back to reality, it would still be there. Gary slowed and became much more gentle, but he continued to stimulate and cradle Dave's still erect organ in his little mouth. Dave jerked with after-shocks of his orgasm. Finally, the boy lifted himself off of the man and said, "I knew I'd love sucking you, Dave. Your penis is beautiful, and I loved the taste of you. I hope you liked me doing it, too. Now you can do the same for me, OK?" Dave shook his head negatively. "Dave, I can't untie you until you do that one or two times, and I don't think you want to be tied up for another three weeks" Gary said. The man shrugged his shoulders and reluctantly nodded his head in agreement. "Oh, and if you start to argue or talk at all when I take the tape off, I'll have to put it right back on again. Do you understand?" "I read about all this stuff in some magazines and books I found, and the first part was a hundred times as good as they described. I can't wait for you to suck me, and then I'm going to try something else. Do you want me to keep it for a surprise or tell you?" Dave shook his head negatively first then positively. "OK, but promise you won't get upset." Dave thought to himself, "Sure, why should I get upset with anything else after what this little bastard has done so far?" Although he thoroughly enjoyed the orgasm, he couldn't bring himself to include it to balance his anger about the rest of the event. "I saw some pictures of a guy putting his penis up another guy's back side, so I want to try to do that with you." Dave shook his head violently be- cause the thought of anyone inserting his penis up his rectum was extremely distasteful. The cognitive dissonance between this and his own desires wasn't apparent to him yet. The boy realized Dave's confusion and said, "Oh no, I meant that I'd sit on you so you could be inside me. I really want to feel you there. Is that better?" Dave shook his head affirmatively, then realized that he shouldn't agree to this either, even though it matched his fantasy. However, he quickly rationalized his feelings by thinking, "Well, since I'm tied up, I should probably cooperate as much as possible so he'll untie me sooner." The fact that his erection had returned quickly as soon as Gary told him what he wanted to do didn't go unnoticed by the boy. He positioned himself above Dave's penis and slid it back and forth between the cheeks of his rear and pressed the head of it against his anus for a few moments. Dave was already thrusting upward. "Oh, wait a minute. We were supposed to do the other thing first." He leaned forward, yanked the tape off of Dave's mouth but held it close and said, "No talking." Dave stopped in mid-word as his mouth was suddenly invaded by a surprisingly hard three inch by one-half inch smooth warm shaft. Without any conscious thought Dave closed his lips around it and explored with his tongue. He had expected it to have an obnoxious flavor but found that there was no taste, just a delightful blend of smoothness, softness and firmness. It seemed only natural to begin sucking as he con- tinued to stimulate this wonderful little boy cock. Gary contributed by lifting his hips then ramming them forward so he pulled his penis completely out of Dave's mouth then drove it all the way in. Dave was dimly aware of a sense of loss each time it withdrew, and more conscious of how nice the smooth skin around the base of Gary's little penis felt against his lips. Because the boy's testosterone level hadn't yet risen to teen-age levels, he took quite a while to achieve an orgasm. Dave had expected a quick resolution, but now he began to worry that he wouldn't be able to get Gary to ejaculate. He began to suck and massage more vigorously. Just as he was beginning to become desperate and worried that nothing would happen, Gary stiffened, pushed his little organ in as deeply as he could, and began to squirt his hot thick fluid. Dave felt a warm flow of pleasure at the joy he had given Gary. In addi- tion, he reveled in the feeling of this little boy's penis softening in his mouth and the sweet starchy flavor of his semen. Now he remembered his restraints because he wanted nothing so much as to put his arms around this beautiful child, keep him pressed tightly against his mouth and cup his firm, smooth rear end in his hands. This complex of emotions and ideas continued for a few moments then suddenly, he came back to reality. He backed away and pushed Gary's little penis out of his mouth. The boy moved down to lie beside him, "You are so wonderful, Dave. I knew I'd love making love to you." "Damn it Gary, that wasn't love. It was rape and just plain sex. You have no right to do what you did. Untie me now. Do you do this with all your sex partners?" "I've only read about it; I've never had sex with anyone until you, and I never want to have sex with anyone else. Didn't I do it right when I sucked you? I thought you enjoyed it. You sure made me feel wonderful when you sucked me. Did you really hate doing that? Besides, would you have ever let me make love to you if I hadn't tied you up?" "Just because I had an orgasm doesn't mean I enjoyed it, but you did it right if that's what you want to know. I'd never sucked another male or even thought about it before, but it was just one of those things. I didn't hate it. And you're right that I'd never have let you do it if you hadn't tied me up." Dave was lying because it fit his prior morality and he thought it was the right thing for him to say. However, as he said the words they forced him to observe that his true feelings were now much dif- ferent from his claims. Gary began to cry. "I only wanted to show you how much I loved you. I'm sorry. I'll untie you and go back to my house. You don't have to see me again. I'll just stay there." He began to loosen the knots. Suddenly Dave realized that he had just lost the chance to fulfill the fantasy he'd wanted for so long. All the changes he'd gone through this afternoon were more than he could assimilate at the moment. "Look, we have to talk about this and see if we can make something positive of a very strange situation. Let's have dinner then discuss it. You may as well stay here tonight." He stopped rubbing his wrists, grabbed a handful of tissues and handed them to Gary who was still sniffling. Dave made salad and sandwiches from items that were in the refrigerator, and they ate silently. After they cleaned up the dishes, they went into the living room and sat down, Gary on the couch and Dave in the chair. "I'm really confused, Gary. You should never force anyone to do anything even if you feel your motivation is from love. I agree that I'd never have consented if you had merely tried to talk me into it because the whole idea of having sex with a twelve year old boy was extremely distasteful to me." "But it was the only existential solution I could see," Gary said. "Maybe so, but it sure tore the living hell out of my ontology" Dave an- swered. He paused then said, "The action was quite different from the concept. I have to be honest with you and tell you that I enjoyed both our oral-genital connections far more than I would ever have expected. In fact, I was really looking forward to the anal sex you mentioned and was a bit disappointed when you untied me. That leaves me with a dilemma. Do I revert to my prior morality and refuse to give in to my desires, or do I change my ethics and continue the new relationship you defined for us? And if I choose the latter, what happens when your parents come home?" "Oh please, Dave. Do the second. I love you, and I really want us to keep making love. I'll do anything you want, and we don't have to tell my par- ents anything. You already know they don't care at all what I do or what happens to me." "It's not that simple, Gary. The two major considerations are, that it's illegal for me to have sex with you as a minor, and that I don't know what kind of psychological damage I may be doing to you by continuing. Your par- ents are just the vehicle that could force us to confront the former of those problems. My ethics make me worry about the latter of them." "If neither they nor anyone else finds out, the first problem is solved. I've already defined my orientation, and you can't change that. If you refuse to continue our relationship, I'll almost certainly seek out someone else who probably won't be nearly as caring and loving as you. That means you'd actually have a greater chance of harming me psychologically if you stop. Dave laughed, "Damn, I hate arguing with smart kids. It would be so much easier if you were an average twelve year old. We'd never have got into this mess." Gary saw that Dave was wavering, "Yeah, but you wouldn't have had the chance for having nearly as much fun if I'd have been average. Why don't we try it for tonight and the next couple of days. Then you can decide whether or not we should continue. The least you can do is give it a statistical chance. I love the idea of pretending that you're Socrates and I'm your favorite student." "And I thought I was the salesman. OK, I'm so confused now, I may as well go along with that and see if I can sort things out any better in the next few days." He got up, went to the couch, sat next to Gary and hugged him. "There was one thing we didn't get to do, earlier. Do you think we could try it tonight?" the boy asked. "I'd love to sleep in your bed with you, Dave." "In for a penny, in for a pound, the old saying went. May as well go all the way. Let's go up and get ready for bed." They turned off the lights downstairs and went to Dave's room. When they got undressed Dave had a completely different orientation as he watched Gary's small body appear. This little boy was superbly beautiful. Never before had he been so aroused, and especially by the sight of young, hairless male genitalia. Gary watched, almost hypnotized, as Dave's adult penis quickly swelled, became erect and it's foreskin rolled back off the stretched glans. "I know we're going to do anal, but I'd love to suck you first. Do you think that'd be OK?" "Only if I can do the same to you, Gary. This time I'm not going to prevent myself from getting every bit of enjoyment from both of us. Let's lie down." They lay on their sides facing each other. The man pulled the boy's naked body close to him and kissed his cheek. Gary turned and their mouths joined. While the boy had nothing to measure this against, Dave compared it with similar activities with women. Why was kissing Gary so far superior to his prior experiences? In the same way, caressing a woman's body was very nice but didn't compare with the joy he got from feeling this little boy's smooth skin and firm flesh under his hands. They continued petting and loving each other for a long while, neither quite willing to move away from this to the next step. Finally, Dave moved around so they were lying in opposite directions. Gary arched his back and Dave bent forward to compensate for their difference in height. That way they could both make contact with the other's genitalia. With no more prelimina- ries, both voraciously engulfed the other's penis. Dave also sucked Gary's small hairless testes into his mouth and vibrated his tongue at high speed all over every bit of warm soft smooth surface. The combination of receiving this wonderful hard little shaft to play with in his mouth while at the same time feeling the boy's small pointed tongue warming and rippling all over his own organ was more pleasure than Dave could have envisioned until a few hours ago. This time he was trying to delay his orgasm for different reasons. First, he wanted to extend his joy as long as possible, and second, he wanted each of them to ejaculate into the other's mouth at the same time. Gary began to stiffen and thrust. Just as his first charge of fluid spurted Dave increased his suction as much as possible to maximize Gary's stimula- tion, and the boy started his own orgasm. Neither swallowed, but rather reveled in holding the other's semen in his mouth and using it to slide around the head of each other's penis even faster. Even when both of them could supply no more, each sucked hungrily at the source of such exquisite pleasure. By the time they finally separated, each had regained his erection. Gary rolled over on his stomach, Dave got a dollop of Vaseline from a jar he had brought from the bathroom, wiped part on himself and kneeled between the boy's spread legs. After applying some of the lubricant to Gary's tightly closed little orifice, Dave held the point of his erect penis to the de- lightful twelve year old anus. Slowly, he increased the pressure against it, and it gradually stretched as he forced himself inside the boy. "If this hurts you, Gary, let me know and I'll stop." Gary agreed to do so. Finally, the boy's sphincter stretched enough that Dave's glans pushed into Gary's tight little rectum. Now he pushed himself all the way up into the boy. It was far hotter, tighter and more slippery than he could have imag- ined. Dave knew he couldn't have another orgasm very quickly, but he loved being inside. "What does that feel like, Gary?" he asked. Well, it hurt quite a bit at first, but I didn't tell you because I didn't want you to stop. Now it's OK. It makes me feel so full, and I love it because I know it's you inside me. You can start moving in and out now, if you want." Dave immediately complied. "Oh Gary, this is even more wonderful than I could ever have envisioned. It feels as if we were made to fit together like this." He began to move in and out in short strokes so he wouldn't lose his connection. "Dave, do you want to try something a little different?" Dave asked what he was thinking of and he replied, "Now that I'm stretched it doesn't hurt, so could you pull entirely out at each stroke then push all the way in, and do it really fast?" He began to pump in long strokes using the technique Gary suggested. The additional stimulation of the boy's little sphincter squeezing the head of Dave's penis at each penetration brought on an entirely unexpected, but ex- tremely strong orgasm. They lay there connected for about a half hour while Dave told the boy how beautiful and delightful he was. Dave finally said, "We can separate now and wash up and go to sleep, or we can try to go to sleep just like this. Which way do you want to do it, Gary." "Gee, I'd really love going to sleep with you inside me. It feels so won- derful for us to love each other, Dave. I wish we could stay like this all night long." "Maybe we can if I hang onto this handle." At that, he wrapped his fingers around Gary's small penis. Since he still had some Vaseline on that hand the boy's shaft became quite slippery. He continued to kiss and nibble at the boy's neck and ear as he masturbated Gary's immature little organ. After they finished, they drifted off to sleep. Dave woke very early. He lay there a long time thinking about the last evening's events and the changes he'd gone through. His guilt had more to do with how quickly he discarded his prior morals and accepted the new ones, than with the fact that Gary was only a child. It probably would have been much stronger and more pervasive had he not still been inside the boy. Dave pressed himself closer to the small sleeping body next to him and his guilt and confusion slowly disappeared as his erection hardened. When Gary woke they separated, went to the bathroom, got cleaned up, had breakfast then rushed back to bed where they planned to spend the weekend. After almost continual loving and sex for both days, Dave realized he still wasn't satiated. He called his company early Monday morning and arranged for three weeks vacation starting immediately. By Thursday the two of them started taking a bit of time off for conversa- tion between their sexual liaisons. They knew they wanted to be together as much as possible, but they recognized the restrictions they would have when Gary's parents came home. The boy went over his parents' schedule so Dave and he could maximize their time together. Dave and Gary drove to the airport to pick up the boy's parents. They weren't quite sure how they'd manage to convince Doug and Sandy that they should let Dave and Gary spend as much time as possible with each other. Both of them knew that if the parents became even slightly suspicious of the new relationship, Dave would be in jail and Gary would be in therapy. "Well, are you still speaking to us, Dave?" Doug asked when they got into the car. "How's it feel to be a parent for three weeks - make you want to get a vasectomy?" Dave said, "He was surprisingly little trouble when he stayed with me during your vacation. I didn't realize that I'd enjoy the company. Besides, I've always liked teaching and almost became a high school teacher. The kid's a great student, so he's a pleasure to tutor." Gary added, "Yeah, I learned stuff from Dave that I probably wouldn't have been exposed to at school for another four or five years. I just didn't think of learning from any adults other than school teachers. Mom and dad, maybe you can spend a few hours every day teaching me stuff. How does that sound?" Dave smiled at the deviousness of this bright little twelve year old. "We'd like to, dear, but your dad is so busy with work and I have so many outside activities that I have to be involved in that it's hard for us to do that. If Dave likes doing that sort of thing, he may be willing to continue spend- ing time with you" Sandy said. "I have an idea. How about if I get the two of you tickets to various historical and important places. That way you could get to travel the way you want to, Dave, and at the same time you could practice your teaching skills by introducing Gary to the geography, anthropology, cultures, et cetera" Doug said. He didn't add the next part of his thought which was, "And it's a great way of getting the kid out of our hair for extended peri- ods." "Sounds fine to me. What do you think of it, Gary?" The boy quickly ap- proved. Doug thought as he continued to drive, "This is bizarre. Until recently, I controlled my life. Now everyone else is changing it for me." While loving and making love was the single most important and time consum- ing activity, it slowly ceased to preempt everything else. They actually did shift to some extent to the teacher-pupil relationship. The man and the boy spent all their vacations traveling around the world, but quite a bit of their time was used christening a great many hotel beds with every variation they could think of and that was anatomically possible. As Dave and Gary spent more and more time together, Sandy and Doug withdrew to enjoy their independence. They were so happy to be relieved of the burden of Gary that it never occurred to them to question the closeness of the relationship between the two. Fifteen years later finds quite a few changes. Gary is now an instructor in the Philosophy department of the University from which he graduated. Dave got a teaching credential and works in a junior high school. The two of them are still together, living in a large house, and they run Socratic seminars for the boys at Dave's school. Patrick Fitzgerald (the old joke: . . . "and vice-versa")