Date: Sun, 6 Sep 1998 00:11:58 EDT
From: BearKattz@aol.com
Subject: LOST SOUL

			      Lost Soul 01/05
			   by Bearkattz@aol.com
______________________________________________________
Thanks once again to everyone's feedback for my last story.   Romance 
ahead, not as much sex as some may like, and role playing of a possible 
offending nature.  Comments, as always, welcome to Bearkattz@aol.com

WARNINGS:  This story depicts loving, consensual, graphic sex as 
well as role playing between two adult males of legal age.  If you are 
offended by such or if reading such material is illegal under the local laws, 
or if you are under the age of 18 or under the age of consent in 
your area, please stop reading now.
__________________________________________________________
Conrad placed the phone back down and frowned at the promise he just made
to a friend.  He had, of course, heard the news over twelve months ago when
the multimillionaire, David Holloway, was killed in a private jet plane
crash.  According to his friend, David had a long time lover named Billy
who took his death quite hard and was not doing well at all.  David had
left all his wealth to Billy and had left him in charge of his many
corporate holdings. But other then the funeral, Billy had hardly left the
house at all since then.  Doctor and psychiatrists had all tried in vain to
coerce the young man in taking better care of his deteriorating health to
no avail.

"So what makes you think I'd be able to help, Jonathan, where health 
professionals failed?"

Conrad heard a deep sigh and the reluctance in his friends voice.  "I had a
slight impression that David and Billy might have had a bit more going for
them in the S/M department.  You understand it's only my opinion.  There
was never a hint of it publicly and they certainly never went to any of the
bars or public scenes.  But David was rich enough he could do whatever he
wanted in that mansion of theirs and no one would be the wiser."

"So what makes you think that there was something going on?"

"It was mainly in the attitude toward each other.  I've never seen two men
more in love with each other but David was older by almost twenty years.
Billy is small, beautiful, a touch effeminate but not overly so.  I can't
just put my finger on it, Conrad, but there was just a hint of a
dominant/submissive when I saw them together on occasion."

"And you think that I could come on as a master to Billy and he'd respond?"

"I can only hope he would.  They've been together for almost ten years.
That's a lot of time for learned responses.  Plus, it's out last hope
really.  The boy's health is failing and we've tried everything else."
There was a long pause.  "Please try, Conrad."

So Conrad found himself in his convertible outside the security gates to
the Holloway mansion responding to the tinny voice over the intercom.
"Conrad Webster.  I have an appointment."

"One moment, sir."

The heavy gates swung open and a camera followed his movement as the car
pulled forward down the long driveway.  The tree lined driveway caused the
setting sun to play hide and seek as he drove almost a quarter of a mile
before he even saw the huge elegant old house.  He parked in front, and a
young man opened his door and took his keys as he stepped out.  He climbed
the brick lined steps and was met at the top of the stairs by an older
uniformed man whose dark hair was sprinkled with grey.  The warm brown eyes
crinkled in a smile as they greeted him.

"Mr. Webster, it's so nice to meet you and so good of you to come.  I'm
Ballard."  A warm hand was extended in greeting and Conrad wasn't surprised
to hear the British accent.  "Come in, come in, please."

"Thank you.  And please call me, Conrad."

"Of course, sir.  May I get you some refreshments?  Scotch, tea?"  the
butler asked as he led the way into the elegant sitting room off the huge
hallway.

"Scotch would be nice, thank you."  

Ballard waved a hand to indicate that Conrad should precede him.  "Please
make yourself comfortable."  Ballard quickly prepared the scotch and
brought the crystal glass over on a silver platter.

Conrad sipped the excellent scotch appreciatively.  "Tell me a little bit
about Billy, Ballard."

The butler nodded solemnly.  "I can't tell you how pleased I am that you
were able to come.  I...We're at our wits end about Master Billy.  I'm
afraid if something isn't done soon..." the voice wavered and trailed off
and Conrad was surprised to see tears in the older man's eyes.  "He's
hardly been eating or sleeping at all since...since Master David's death.
We all thought it would pass with time...," the voice trailed off for a
moment.

 "But he's deteriorated slowly.  He won't check himself into a  hospital or 
seek any  kind of help." The butler was wringing his hands in obvious 
agitation and  helplessness.  "He just stays in their bedroom.  I've managed 
to coerce a bit of food down him and to take a shower and clean the room 
but only when I've pleaded with him that things were getting a bit on the 
unclean side or I made him something special to eat.  But I hear him
prowling the house all hours of the night, sir." 

 Ballard paused and took a deep breath. "I haven't told this to anyone else, 
sir, but I'm sincerely afraid for his life now.  Lord knows what would have 
happened if I hadn't come back from the funeral sooner than I planned."

Conrad frowned at this last statement.  "What do you mean??"

"Master Billy told the staff after the funeral to take three weeks vacation - 
paid of course.   He said he was going to take some time off as well.  But I 
couldn't stay away more than a week, sir.  I had a bad feeling and came 
straight back here.  Master Billy hadn't gone away.  He was here in the 
house alone and practically incoherent with grief when I found him.  It was 
horrible.  He hadn't eaten or showered and had been crying.  I think he was 
dying from a broken heart."  Ballard voice practically whispered the last
sentence.  "I managed to clean him up and force a little broth down 
him and called adoctor.  But he couldn't do anything because Billy refused 
help.  It's been little better than that for over eleven months now."

David and Billy sounded like two men who were very much in love.  
For two gay men to find such happiness in a long term relationship was 
not quite rare but special enough to comment on.  And then it was suddenly 
and abruptly and harshly taken away.  No time for getting used to the idea as 
with an illness but quickly ripped out from under you.  No wonder the boy was 
upset.  And grieving was natural.  Each person's grief manifested itself
differently.  

Some kept it hidden, some gave in to the deep emotion in private, and some
paraded it publicly, willingly sharing with those around them in an effort
to assuage the grief.  It sounded like Billy tried to grieve in private but
was interrupted.  Who knows what would have happened if Ballard had stayed
away for those three weeks?  Perhaps Ballard would have found Billy well
and, while not exactly happy, coping.  Perhaps Ballard would have found a
corpse?  Billy sounded like he was only acceding to some extent to Ballard'
wishes and pleas but not enough to overcome his deeply felt emotional
crisis.  What would it take?

If David and Billy had a dom/sub relationship would a master's voice be
enough to instinctively rouse the boy from his stupor?  Or would it bring
back memories that are possibly even now receding?  On the other hand, the
boy's health was in danger and his friends were worrying that he would even
survive.  Doctors and psychiatrists hadn't helped, could he?

Conrad swirled the amber liquid in the glass and pondered the butler's
words for such a long time that Ballard shifted uneasily on his feet. 

"Take me to him."  The butler nodded gravely but was stopped by the 
next words, "And whatever I do, don't interfere."  Conrad moved past the 
butler and  waited a few feet away for a perplexed Ballard to lead him to 
Billy's room.

Ballard led the way up to a huge spiraled, marble staircase covered with a
deep burgundy carpet and held in place with brass rods nestled softly in
the corners.  He turned left at the top and walked a few steps to a set of
white French doors and quietly knocked before opening.  He cleared his
throat, "You have a visitor, sir.  Mr. Conrad Webster."  Ballard held the
door open and Conrad stepped into a darkened bedroom.  Slowly his eyes
adjusted to the dim lighting and he could just make out a small figure
curled into a love seat clutching a pillow to his chest.  The boy appeared
to be only wearing boxers, his pale shoulders naked and gleaming in the
near darkness, and was staring out a partially opened curtain into the
fading sunlight outside. The only sound to be heard was the quiet ticking
of a grandfather clock from the hallway.  The boy made no acknowledgment of
their presence and Conrad glanced questioningly at Ballard.  He just shook
his head as if indicating this was normal.

Conrad straightened his shoulders, closed his eyes for a brief 
moment, very much aware of the magnitude of the situation, and quickly 
barked out a command that resonated in the stillness, "Get dressed.  
I want to see you downstairs in the sitting room in five minutes."  
The boy jumped at the stern voice and, eyes wide, turned toward the sound. 
The butler gave a stifled gasp.  He squinted when his eyes met the bright
light from the hallway as it flooded into the room as he tried to 
make out the person standing there.  All he could see was the outline of a 
tall, broad shouldered figure as it stood silhouetted in the doorway.  He 
frowned in confusion...D..David?  No, David was dead.  But who else would 
speak to him like that?  

"Move it, Billy.  You've only got four minutes now," the voice 
commanded sternly again but without anger as it turned and left.

Conrad headed down the stairs followed by a very confused butler.  Conrad
entered the sitting room and made directly for the bar where he poured
himself another very large scotch.  He downed it quickly and went to sit on
the brocade couch and glanced at the watch.  Two minutes to go and no sound
of any movement.  Was he wrong?  He remembered the startled glance the boy
had given him.  But from the butlers reaction it was more than the boy had
done before.  The five minutes were up before Conrad heard labored
breathing and could see pale hands clutching the railing as a trembling
figure dressed in a robe descended.  This time it was Conrad's turn to
gasp.  The boy was captivating.  Small, unwashed, unshaved, pale, much too
thin with black, stringy shoulder length hair and as he reached the bottom
of the staircase and turned toward the sitting room, Conrad could see the
marvelous dark blue eyes that were framed with red rimmed lids.  Conrad, in
the role of one of the top masters in the country, had seen his share of
gorgeous men and had the pleasure of training many of them personally.  So
he was slightly unprepared for his reaction to the sight of the young man.
He felt as if he'd been sucker punched.  What was it about the slight
figure that so entranced him?  While the thin figure was certainly no
beauty in the condition he was in, there was something about him that drew
his gaze and held his breath.  Was it the large, blue eyes that bespoke of
great inner beauty or were they just windows to a lost soul looking for
peace?  Billy hesitated in the doorway looking for the source of the voice
that had woken him from his daze.  He heard it again.

"You're late.  Sit down before you fall down."  The boy jerked again and
looked at him in fear but did as he was told.  Conrad inwardly frowned.
The boy was afraid.  Not the reaction he would expect if the boy was used
to a dom/sub relationship. He wasn't angry or displeased and didn't use
that kind of tone but one merely expecting obedience.  Something wasn't
right.  No matter if the boy had apparently responded to it.  Conrad needed
some more time before continuing.  He turned to the butler who had a very
unbutlerlike gaping mouth.

"Ballard, could you please get Billy some food.  Perhaps some  scrambled eggs,
clear soup, toast and some milk, please?"  He had to repeat it before Ballard 
nodded his head and quickly headed for the kitchen.

"Billy, my name is Conrad Webster.  Your friends have been worried 
about you and asked if I could help.  Do you understand?"

Billy nodded, his eyes wide.  "Why?" The voice was little more than 
a dry croak. 

Conrad stood up and went to the bar to get some water and handed 
the glass to Billy.

"Drink," he ordered as Billy just stared at the glass as if unsure what to
do.  The water spilled over the top as the trembling hands tried to hold
it.  Conrad took it back and was surprised when there was a spark, almost
like electricity, as their hands touched for the first time, and held it up
to the chapped lips.  Billy sipped the water.

"Why what?"

There was a brief silence as Billy tried to remember the question he 
had asked.  "Why are they worried?"

Conrad shook his head.  "Billy, you haven't been eating, or 
sleeping.  You refuse medical help.  Look at you!  You're a mess.  They're 
your friends and they care about you.  Don't you think they should be 
worried?"  

Billy shook his head, sluggishly.  "No." 

"Why not?"

Again, a long pause.  "Because they know I love... loved,  David so 
much and I miss him and want to be with him."  The voice cracked again and 
Conrad  held up the glass to the full mouth once again.

Conrad shivered at the flat tone in which the death wish was uttered and
turned to sit back down on the couch..  He started to speak again but was
surprised when the voice continued without prompting.  "He was my anchor.
I met him when I was 13.  He took me off the streets where I was whoring
and cleaned me up, straightened me out.  Gave me an education at the best
schools in exchange for promising never to go back to my old ways.  It
wasn't sexual at first.  I was just his protege, his ward.  It wasn't till
I graduated from high school that it became more.  I never had anyone until
David.  He was my life.  I don't know how to live without him.  He was more
than just my lover...he was my everything.  Why do people think I can go on
without him?  Am I supposed to pretend he never existed?  He saved my life
and now he's dead and I don't want to live without him.  Why is that
wrong?"  The deep blue eyes were brimming with tears that streamed down his
face as he asked the question with such confusion that Conrad felt his
heart go out to the boy.  The pale hands were clutching the arm rests, the
body tense with stress.

There was a long moment of silence before Conrad spoke.  "No, it's not
wrong, Billy.  But decisions like that need to be made in the calm light of
morning not in the darkness of night which is where the initial grieving
takes place.  Do you understand?"

Billy hiccupped.  To Conrad's delight, a small embarrassed smile spread
momentarily across the fine features swollen by crying.  Ballard came in
then and the moment dispersed but Conrad wasn't upset by the interruption
but rather welcomed it.  Ballard carried a tray and set it on the coffee
table, glancing curiously out of the corner of his eye at his master.
Billy hiccupped again and Conrad nodded at Ballard's unspoken question and
the butler left with a hope in his heart for the first time in many months.


			      Lost Soul 02/05
			   by Bearkattz@aol.com
______________________________________________________
Thanks once again to everyone's feedback for my last story.   Romance 
ahead, not as much sex as some may like, and role playing of a possible 
offending nature.  Comments, as always, welcome to Bearkattz@aol.com

WARNINGS:  This story depicts loving, consensual sex as well as role 
playing between two adult males of legal age.  If you are offended 
by such or if reading such material is illegal under the local laws, 
or if you are under the age of 18 or under the age of consent in 
your area, please stop reading now.
__________________________________________________________

Billy began to shake his head at the sight of the food.  "I'm not 
hungry."

Conrad began to order him to eat but something stopped him from 
using the command. "You need to eat, Billy," he said quietly but firmly.  

"I don't think I can." Billy's hand went down to his belly and 
rubbed it a moment.  

Suddenly, Conrad had an idea that crept slowly into his 
consciousness and he toyed with the supporting facts that seemed to fit.  

"Billy, come here, " he said, patting the couch beside him.  

Billy's eye's widened but he rose unsteadily to his feet and made 
his way to the couch before sitting down next to Conrad.  He turned 
expectantly toward him with a questioning look, sitting on the edge of 
the furniture. 

"No.  Sit back and relax." Conrad said, placing a hand on the chest 
and pushing gently back.  Billy sat back and watched as Conrad reached 
for the plate of eggs and toast.  

He began to shake his head, "No, I can't, really."

"Yes, you can and you will.  Do you hear me?" 

Billy nodded slowly and watched as Conrad speared some egg on the 
fork and brought it to his mouth.  For just a brief second the mouth stayed 
stubbornly closed before it opened and the egg was deposited.  
The eyes filled with unshed tears  but Conrad broke off a piece of the 
fresh bread and held it up.  Billy swallowed the egg and the
mouth opened again.  Small bites of food were followed by sips of 
milk before Billy shook his head once again.

"I can't anymore.  Honest," he pleaded with the older man.  His hand 
went to his belly and rubbed it in pain.

"It's okay, Billy.  You're not used to eating.  You've done very 
well."  Conrad was delighted to see Billy's eyes light up at the 
compliment.  He put the plate and glass down and saw Billy's eyes 
droop with weariness.  

"You're tired.  You should go to bed now." Conrad jerked at the 
response the words wrought as Billy sat straight up, his eyes wide 
with panic.

"No. No! I'm fine.  I'm okay.  Don't make me go to bed.  Please 
don't make me go to bed." Billy was babbling.  All calmness dissipated 
and Billy was as tense as he'd been when he first entered the room.

"Shhh, it's okay, now.  You don't have to go to bed.  But you are 
tired, aren't you? Ballard says you haven't been sleeping."

Billy nodded and his head sank to his chest as Conrad began to 
stroke the fine hair off the forehead in a caress.  Billy actually leaned 
into the hand that was stroking him.

"Come here, Billy."  Conrad pulled the smaller man into his lap and 
was rewarded with a pair of arms that wrapped around his neck and 
a head that rested  on his shoulder.  He was appalled at how light Billy felt.

"It's okay.  You can rest here."  Instead of relaxing, he felt Billy tense 
and wondered what he'd done wrong when he heard the first
heartfelt sob break.  Billy was crying.   

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry." Billy sobbed, trying to stop.

"Billy, it's okay.  It's good to cry.  Let it out now.  Get it all 
out."  With those words, Billy broke completely and began to cry in 
earnest, his tears soaking into Conrad's shirt.  

"I..I...miss....miss...him..so..so much," came the soft voice broken 
with sharp gasps of air.

"It's okay to miss him.  It's okay." Conrad wished he didn't sound 
like a broken record but the boy seemed to take solace in his words.  
Words that told him  it was okay to grieve instead of telling him not to.  
Or telling him to get over it and get on with his life and what's the matter 
with him.  The boy not only deeply felt the loss of a lover, he missed the 
barrier his lover had obviously placed around him to protect his sensitive
nature.  He wanted to have a long talk with Ballard in the morning. 

The sobs soon quieted with only the quick intake of air that shook 
his whole body as Conrad rocked the slender figure in his lap.  He kept 
stroking the  hair and back until even those eventually stopped.  Billy was 
asleep.  He had turned so he lay on his side with his face pressed into 
Conrad's chest, his legs trailing onto  the couch while Conrad held his 
upper body. 

Conrad's own eyes grew heavy and laid his head back and closed them.  
He doubted he'd been asleep for long when the body he still held in his arms 
jerked.  He opened his eyes and looked down so see Billy thrashing and 
murmuring in his sleep.  

Suddenly, he cried, "Daddy!"

Conrad quickly shushed the moaning boy and whispered soothing words 
while stroking the sweating forehead.  Billy calmed down and fell into a more 
relaxed sleep, nuzzling the nipple that was protruding through Conrad's shirt.

All of Conrad's suspicions were confirmed as he thought about what had 
just transpired during the last couple of hours. David and Billy didn't have a
dom/sub relationship per se but more of a father/son relationship that was 
obviously sexual as well.  

It explained why their friend picked up on the subtleness of the behavior 
but just came to the wrong conclusion.  It also explained why Billy responded 
to Conrad when he ordered him to get dressed.  Except that he wasn't 
responding as an obedient slave  but  rather as an obedient son. It was 
also the reason that Billy was confused and frightened as well. David 
probably only spoke sternly in anger not as the normal means 
of communication of a master.  He was also sure that there was a genuine 
sexual love  between the two men and that the daddy/son relationship 
evolved out of that.   It was too hidden for it to be more than just a casual 
game they played, while the man to man love was open for all to see.  
Perhaps Billy had taken the daddy/son relationship farther than it was meant
or perhaps it filled a need in the fatherless boy.  Suddenly, Conrad 
realized that was the real reason.  When he lost David, he not only lost his 
lover, but his soul mate and his father.  No wonder the poor boy was stricken 
and lost.

But now Conrad was at a loss himself.  What did he know of daddy/son 
gay relationships?  He was a master.  With that he was comfortable.  He 
looked down at the ravaged face of the young man in his arms.  Unlike 
a slave who could bought or sold or given away, you couldn't just find a 
father or give away a son.  He was afraid, and with some trepidation, 
delighted in Billy's response to him.  It meant a connection had
already been established.  One that Conrad couldn't break without 
severing Billy's tentative thread on life.  Whether he liked it or not, Conrad
just had a son!  Congratulations, he told himself sarcastically, it's a boy!

He grimaced as he realized his arm had fallen asleep where Billy's 
head rested on it. He was considering moving it when he saw Ballard stick 
his head in the door.  He realized they couldn't sleep on the couch all night 
and made a quick decision.  He motioned with his head and Ballard 
walked quietly over.  "We've won the first round, Ballard.  He's eaten a bit. 
Now he  needs to get cleaned up and some rest.  Can you run a bath 
and I'll see to him if you could change the sheets upstairs?"

Ballard beamed once he heard Billy had eaten and began to nod 
vigorously at the instructions.  "Yes, sir.  Right away, sir."

When Ballard left, Conrad leaned over and kissed the sweaty 
forehead.  "Billy.  Time to wake up, " he paused just a bit, "baby."  
He had to talk quietly for  almost a minute for Billy groggily responded.

"'M tired."

"I know you are, baby.  We're gonna get you cleaned up and then into 
a nice clean bed.  How's that sound?  Good?" Conrad prompted.

"Mmmm."

"Come on, baby.  Wake up."

This time the word baby must of sunk in because the blue eyes opened 
and stared into Conrad's dark brown ones.

Conrad nonchalantly sat Billy up in his lap and then stood him up 
hanging on to the thin hips.  Billy swayed as a wave of dizziness 
swept over him. 

"It's okay.  I've got you." Conrad said and with a swift motion, 
easily picked the light weight in his arms and headed toward the staircase.  
Billy brought his arms around Conrad's neck and didn't take his eyes from 
him but didn't say a  word.  He strode into the bedroom and Ballard was 
standing at the bathroom door holding bath towels and cloths.  He sat 
Billy down on a chair in the bathroom which was about as big as his
entire apartment.  A giant marble oval whirlpool/ tub bubbled gently 
in the center. Conrad unwrapped the robe around Billy and gave it to 
Ballard who promptly replaced it.  Conrad motioned for Billy to stand up 
and swiftly removed the boxers that almost fell off the nonexistent hips.  
Ballard tried to stifle a moan at the sight of Billy's emaciated body and 
Billy looked embarrassed. 

Conrad quickly leaned forward to kiss the down turned mouth.  "We'll 
have him back fit and trim in no time, Ballard, you'll see.  Right, baby?" he 
deliberately asked him.

Billy nodded but it quickly turned into a shiver as the cool air 
stroked his skin and with no reserves of fat left on the body, left 
him trembling.

Conrad felt himself shiver at the sight of Billy's naked body.  As 
thin and starved as it was, he could see the beauty of the boy and 
it had him spellbound.  Billy was pale to begin with and small.  He 
couldn't be more than five foot seven  inches, an easy 6 inches smaller 
than Conrad's six foot one, but he was beautifully proportioned.  The
practically hairless body was natural with just a slight dusting of 
fine hair over the lower half of his legs and under his arms as well as 
surrounding a small cock which was shrunk in the cold as if  trying 
to hide itself in the balls that were also retreating into the body.

With a mental shake of his head, Conrad picked Billy up and carried 
him over to the now full tub.  Conrad realized that the tub was sunken 
and he couldn't place Billy in the water or wash him without getting in 
the tub himself.  Well, he'd do the best he could. Billy was exhausted 
and would probably fall asleep if left alone and he really, really
needed the bath.

He set Billy back down and then helped him into the warm, soothing 
water.  He saw a set of speakers and started to turn to find the stereo 
when Billy grabbed his arm.

"Please come in with me?" The blue eyes pleaded and Conrad hesitated 
only a moment before nodding.  

He quickly shed his own clothes and stepped into the bubbling tub.  
He caught Billy looking at his body before the water covered it up.  
He had fairly thick blonde hair on his own muscular chest and legs 
and a trimmed bush that was only a shade darker than the hair on his head.  
He knew his flaccid cock was larger than average but it suited his frame 
and swung gently between a set of fairly heavy  shaven balls.

He scooted over toward Billy and realized that the young man was 
seated on a bench that ran around the sides of the tub on one end.  
"We need to wash your hair, baby.  It needs it badly.  Why don't you 
come over here and sit in my lap.  You can lean back and I'll hold you 
while you get your hair wet."  

Billy moved eagerly into Conrad's arms and soon had a headful of 
lather.  Conrad made him rinse and washed it again.  The black length 
flowed over the pale shoulders and contrasted beautifully with the white 
skin.  Conrad finished with the hair and then reached for the cloth and soap 
and began to clean every bit of skin on Billy.  He motioned for Billy to 
stand so he could clean the circumcised cock that seemed to be a bit warmer.  
He methodically cleaned it and the balls and Billy sat down to rinse off.  

"Lay face down on my lap, baby." Conrad climbed to sit on the steps.  Billy
easily moved to place himself face down and soon had a warm sudsy cloth
cleaning between his ass cheeks.  Conrad frowned as he felt Billy's hard
belly against his legs.  He finished with the cloth and looked around until
he saw a basket sitting by the tub.  It was filled with everything from
loofahs and condoms to lube and a yellow rubber duck.  He grabbed the lube
and spread the cold gel on his finger and then around Billy's wrinkled
opening.  He felt his own cock twitch at the site of the hole but his
concern soon outweighed his sexual desires.  He felt Billy gasp as the cold
gel met his warm skin.

"What..what are you doing?"

Conrad didn't answer but gently inserted his finger into the hole.  
It slipped in easily but he felt Billy tense and try to expel it.  "Shhh, it's
okay, baby. Shhh."  With just a small amount of probing, Conrad found 
what he expected to find.  He took  his finger out and wiped it on the
washcloth.

He sat Billy up in his lap and rubbed the hard belly.  "When's the 
last time you had a bowel movement, Billy?"

"I dunno." Billy wiggled as Conrad's stroking grew uncomfortable.

"Well, that's probably why your belly hurts, sweetheart.  You're 
going to have to have an enema."


			      Lost Soul 03/05
			   by Bearkattz@aol.com
______________________________________________________
Thanks once again to everyone's feedback for my last story.   Romance 
ahead, not as much sex as some may like, and role playing of a possible 
offending nature.  Comments, as always, welcome to Bearkattz@aol.com

WARNINGS:  This story depicts loving, consensual sex as well as role 
playing between two adult males of legal age.  If you are offended 
by such or if reading such material is illegal under the local laws, 
or if you are under the age of 18 or under the age of consent in 
your area, please stop reading now.
__________________________________________________________

Conrad knew that enemas were probably something Billy was used to as 
part of a gay sex life that included anal penetration but some men still hated
it.  

"Okay.  But you'll give it to me, won't you, Conrad.  I mean, I 
don't want a doc to do it."

Conrad was pleased that Billy had used his name but shook his head at the
same time. "I'll try but if it doesn't work, we'll have to let the doc take
a look at you.  You're pretty constipated down there." He patted the firm
belly for emphasis.  "Ok?"

He stood them up and with Billy's instructions found the necessary 
equipment.  "Do you want to do here or on the bed?"

"On the bed, please.  So..I mean, can you hold me while we wait, 
then?"  The blue eyes pleaded again and Conrad found himself 
not able to deny them  anything. 

"Sure, baby.  Why don't you wait in the other room under the 
covers?"

Within a few minutes, Conrad in a warm robe had everything ready 
and headed toward the bedroom and a dozing Billy.  He was amused 
to find that the antique oak valet holder was used as the enema stand 
and set everything up.  He placed a bathsize towel on the bed and Billy 
scooted over onto it and lay on his side with his hands under
his cheek.  He looked so young and alone, Conrad felt he was on the 
brink of stepping over the edge of a cliff with this young man. 

Conrad lubed the tip of the enema hose and reached down to scoot 
Billy's leg up to reveal the brownish pink opening and gently inserted the
tip.  

"You ready, baby?" he asked hoarsely.  Lust and the amount of trust that 
he was being shown warred within him at that moment.  He stroked the 
firm pale buttocks and Billy nodded. Conrad sat behind him and reached to 
turn the clamp on the hose and felt the water flow through the hose into 
Billy's body.  He opted for a slow, steady stream since he didn't know
Billy's reaction to the enema but the young man seemed accepting.  
Since Billy wasn't having any problems, Conrad laid down and spooned 
himself behind him and pulled him closer.

"You okay, baby?" 

"Hmmmm," came the drowsy reply but the body scooted closer to his 
own.

It was just a short while later, Billy tensed and Conrad brought his 
head up to peer down at him.

"You got a cramp?"  Billy nodded and Conrad reached over and began to
soothe the belly with gentle strokes.  It was distended just a bit and
Conrad glanced at the see through bottle.  They still had almost halfway to
go.  He continued to rub the belly and Billy soon relaxed again almost
drifting off to sleep.  When the bottle was empty, Conrad got up to remove
the hose.

Billy stirred and grimaced in pain as the water acted on his bowels.  
"Would you like a plug, sweetheart?" 

Billy did and pointed to where Conrad could find one which was 
quickly lubed and inserted.  Conrad set the alarm on the bedside for the 
allotted time for "severe constipation" and then climbed into bed and 
helped Billy to scoot  next to him with his back to his chest.  He held the 
man between his legs and felt his cock stir as Billy's ass wiggled back 
against him.  Billy rested his head against the broad chest and for the first
time in many months, he felt safe and protected.  He felt, for the first time
in many months,  a stirring of his soul.  He felt he could trust this complete
stranger who so abruptly entered his life. This man from nowhere who 
understood about David's and his relationship.  

"What do you do, Con?" Billy said unconsciously giving him a 
nickname for which Conrad felt ridiculously pleased.  

But he shook his head and started  to say, "Later," when Billy groaned. 
He felt his bowels move and brought his legs up for some relief.

Conrad felt Billy get more uncomfortable as time passed so he tried 
to distract him.  "Tell me about David, Billy."

Billy felt such a relief at being able to talk about David without someone
thinking he was being morbid or pitiful that he completely forgot about the
increasing cramps.  He told Conrad about their first time together, about
their vacations and travels around the world.  He told how David made him
learn about the different businesses so that Billy could take a larger role
in them.  Billy knew about importing, knew the travel industry, knew about
P & L reports as well as the basic running of a company.  If Conrad had any
doubts about how the companies that David had would run under Billy's hand,
they were quickly dismissed.  Billy had the knowledge and the ability but
what he didn't have was the desire.  He did it to please David and now that
David was gone, what was the purpose?  David had been smart enough to hire
some of the best managers in the world to help him run his organizations so
it wasn't as if they would fall apart quickly without someone at the helm.
But soon, major decisions had to be made.

Conrad just listened as Billy related a humorous story about David 
and a reporter in Australia when Billy suddenly tensed and his arms went 
around his belly and brought his legs to his chest.  "I've gotta go, Conrad.  
I've gotta go now."

"Hold on, baby." He glanced at the clock.  They still had five more 
minutes to go.  "Hold on for five more minutes, sweetheart."  

"I can't wait." Billy stated adamantly, sweat being to pool on his 
forehead.

"Five more minutes, please.  Five more minutes and I'll tell you 
about myself."  Billy nodded his agreement and Conrad began to tell Billy 
about his life as a writer of gay mysteries and briefly, about his life in the
world of S/M.  He had retired from most of that world in order to work on 
his regular mystery novel that he hoped to have published.

"So you're like this big honcho in the S/M world?" Billy asked, 
discomfort totally forgotten with this revelation into the dark world of S/M.

"Well, I used to be.  I'm not that involved anymore.  It requires a 
lot of time and effort that I'm not willing to sacrifice right now."

"Oh, Con! I gotta go!  Now!"  Conrad glanced at the alarm and saw 
there were only thirty seconds to go, so he quickly stood and scooped Billy
 up and headed rapidly into the bathroom.  He quickly removed the plug and
gently  placed him on the toilet.  He had intended to leave Billy for privacy
but the young man held onto him.

Many minutes later when Billy was done and weak, Conrad cleaned him off and
brought him back to the bed.  He was pleased with the results but knew they
had to do it once more. "I'm sorry, baby, but you realize we have to do it
again, don't you?"  Billy nodded lethargically and Conrad set up everything
again.  This time, he just held Billy as the man drowsed in his arms.  He
shook Billy awake and headed for the bathroom when the time was up.

After it was done, Conrad was pleased to feel the soft belly and 
steered Billy toward the shower.  Conrad stripped as well and rinsed Billy 
off just as the increasingly weakening man legs gave out.  He brought him 
back to the bed and grabbed some towels and dried the unconscious man as 
best as he could.  He covered him with blankets and went back to clean up 
the bathroom and put all the equipment and towels away.

He glanced at the clock; it was almost midnight.  So much had 
happened in just a few short hours.  His whole life had turned around.  
He slipped off the towel he had been wearing and climbed into bed beside 
Billy who didn't even stir.  He wrapped his arms around the slender figure 
and scooted closer to him and joined Billy in oblivion.

He woke the next morning when the sun came streaming in through the 
still partially opened curtain.  He glanced down to see Billy sleeping halfway
on  top of him and wished he could have stayed and enjoyed the feeling longer 
but  nature called. Urgently.  He slipped out from under the young man 
and quickly took care of his full bladder.  He found fresh towels laying on 
the counter as well as a razor and mentally thanked Ballard for his 
thoughtfulness.  His clothes from yesterday  were washed and pressed and 
hanging neatly on a gleaming brass bathroom hook.  He showered, 
shaved and dressed and peeked out to see Billy still deeply asleep.  
He tiptoed out and headed in the only direction he knew - down the 
staircase.  He was met at the bottom by another uniformed male servant.

"I'm Kendall, Mr. Webster.  Mr. Ballard has breakfast waiting for 
you in the dining room, sir, if you'd follow me."

The dining room was set buffet style and the table was set for two.  Silver
gleamed and fresh flowers decorated the table filling the room with their
delicate scent.  Kendall took his drink request and Conrad set about to
pile his plate high with fluffy scrambled eggs, bacon, homemade biscuits,
fresh fruit, wonderful coffee and freshly squeezed orange juice.  He had
practically inhaled it all when Ballard came in to check on how he was
doing.

"Fine, fine.  Thank you for asking.  Billy slept well, " Conrad 
grinned, "and so did I.  And this, "he waved his hand at the elaborate set up,
"was wonderful.  You didn't have to go to all the trouble."

"Sir, the staff and I just want to say thank you for what you've 
done. The breakfast was just a small way of saying how grateful we are.  
I don't know what we would have done.  Master Billy was...he just wasn't 
doing well...you understand?" 

Conrad watched Ballard as he floundered for probably one of the few 
times in his life. "I do and thank you.  I have some..questions, however, 
if you don't mind."  Without waiting for a response, Conrad continued, 
"Please sit down."

Ballard nodded and sat stiffly in the chair.  "Of course, sir."

"Tell me a bit about David and Billy.  Their relationship, how they 
met."

Ballard went into detail of what he knew about the couple.  He said 
basically the same things that Billy skimmed over but went into more 
detail.  Billy was orphaned at age 8 and was sent from one foster family 
to another until he ran away at age 11.  He'd spent almost two years 
alone on the streets before he met David.  Conrad's coffee cup was
refilled twice as Ballard finished his tale by telling how he had 
received the phone call about Master David's death and he was the one 
who had to break the  news to Billy.  Conrad was silent throughout the 
whole story but now asked the question he'd been waiting to ask since last
night.  

"Was there any thing different about David and Billy's 
relationship?"  He knew he hit the nail on the head when Ballard blushed.  

"Well, they had their private lives, sir."

"And what did they do in their, "private lives",  Ballard?"

At first, he thought the butler wasn't going to answer him as the 
silence stretched on, but then Ballard spoke.  "You have to understand, 
sir, that Master  Billy was so young and hurt and alone when Master 
David found him.  At first, Master Billy looked toward Master David as 
a father figure.  Then as he got older, it turned into something more.  I
believe Master David loved the boy from the very beginning so when 
Master Billy finally confessed his love for him, he was delighted.  Master 
Billy knew, of course, that Master David was gay.  He never tried to hide 
that from the young boy but never made any advances toward him at all.  
It was Master Billy who did when he returned from school. I've never seen 
Master David look so happy.  And I know in the beginning there was 
nothing more than a very loving and sexual relationship."  Ballard 
paused a moment, before continuing.  "I knew they had a healthy sexual 
life but as  the years went by, I began to see them begin to have a fairly 
active fantasy life as well.  They didn't make any secret about it and since 
I was the one who ended opening the mail and packages and keeping their 
supplies in stock and their...toys...clean, well, I knew what was going
on.  But you have to understand, sir, it was strictly private.  
Something they did for themselves in the privacy of their own bedroom 
or playroom."

Ballard poured himself a cup of coffee and quickly drained the brew.  

"After a while, I could see a new aspect of the relationship come 
about.  It extended into their real lives as well but it was so subtle 
I doubt if anyone but myself saw it.  It was more of an attitude than 
anything else.  Master Billy seemed to defer to Master David
more and enjoyed it while Master David was more...well, fatherly, 
is the best word for it.  It was completely opposite of what Master 
David had always been  in the past with the boy.  He went out of his way 
to make sure that Master Billy always had a say in everyday and business
affairs.  And that continued as well, but it was mainly here at the house.  
It never happened when they were out together.  Master Billy has always 
been rather sensitive and Master David always took great pains to shield 
Master Billy from as much as he could. The boy had such a rough life and 
had seen so many horrible things in his young days. I think it just evolved
from their natural relationship between each other.  And I must say, 
Master Billy blossomed.  I don't think he was ever happier than he was in 
these last few years.  Their love for each other grew. It sometimes hurt to 
see them together, they were so much in love and immersed in
each other's lives.  Love like that, sir, is rare indeed."

Conrad found himself swallowing a large lump in his own throat that 
threatened to overwhelm him at Ballard's poignant words.

There was a long moment in which neither man spoke.  Finally, Conrad 
cleared his throat and broke the silence, "Thank you, Ballard, for telling me 
this.  It's a big help." 

He knew he probably couldn't get Ballard to reveal much more.  He 
could tell it had been hard for the devoted butler to tell about such 
personal aspects of his beloved employers lives.

He stood up and waited for Ballard to rise stiffly to his feet.  He 
held out his hand and the astonished butler shook it with great warmth.

"Thank you, sir."

Conrad grabbed one more cup of coffee, knowing he would regret it 
later, and headed upstairs.  He opened the bedroom door and saw Billy 
staring up at the ceiling.

He coughed quietly to announce his presence and walked in.  He 
placed the cup on the night stand and sat down on the edge of the bed.  
"Good morning, baby.  Sleep well?"

Billy turned toward him and held out his hand.  "I thought you had 
gone.  I mean, left.  You know, for good?"

"I wouldn't do that to you, baby.  I won't  leave you until you want 
me to go.  But you do realize that you're going to be okay?  Whether 
I'm here or not, you're going to be okay."

Billy scrambled to his knees, the blankets getting caught around his 
knees, unaware of his nakedness.  "But I don't want you to leave!"

Conrad sat down and pulled Billy onto his lap and kissed him gently 
on the forehead. "Okay, but we need to talk."  Billy nodded vigorously.  
"After you eat."

"Oh man!"  Billy mumbled to himself all the way to the bathroom but 
Conrad took that as a good sign.  Billy showered and shaved and Conrad 
helped him dress and comb out his long hair before they headed hand in 
hand downstairs.  

The servants faces lit up in delight at their clean and refreshed 
employer.  They brought him orange juice and made sure there was 
plenty of fresh, hot food for him to choose from.  Billy would have just 
picked up a piece of toast but Conrad took the plate from him and piled it 
high before handing it back to Billy who just rolled his eyes.

Breakfast passed quickly with Conrad encouraging Billy to eat and 
talking about mundane subjects like the weather and the news.  Billy 
suddenly got  quiet and just picked at his food.  

"What's the matter, Billy?"

Billy shrugged but didn't look at him.  


			      Lost Soul 04/05
			   by Bearkattz@aol.com
______________________________________________________
Thanks once again to everyone's feedback for my last story.   Romance 
ahead, not as much sex as some may like, and role playing of a possible 
offending nature.  Comments, as always, welcome to Bearkattz@aol.com

WARNINGS:  This story depicts loving, consensual sex as well as role 
playing between two adult males of legal age.  If you are offended 
by such or if reading such material is illegal under the local laws, 
or if you are under the age of 18 or under the age of consent in 
your area, please stop reading now.
__________________________________________________________
"C'mon, baby, you can tell me," Conrad encouraged.

"You said," Billy began hesitatingly, "you wouldn't leave me until I 
wanted you to go."

Conrad nodded.

"But what if I don't want you to go.  Ever."  The blue eyes were 
fixated on the congealing eggs on his plate.

Conrad felt lost.  He felt an amazing connection to Billy and apparently it
was returned. But was he feeling genuine affection, love even or just lust?
And was Billy just filling the void in his life by the nearest convenient
daddy figure?  But Conrad had to admit there was a spark between them.
Something he'd only felt in his master/slave relationship twice before.  He
knew he wouldn't, couldn't, turn his back on that magical wonderful
feeling.

He stood and walked over to Billy.  He bent over and took Billy's 
chin in his hand and lifted his face toward him.  Again, that spark of 
energy passed  between them.  

"I won't leave you, Billy, until you want me to leave. I promise.  
And I don't break my word.  Ever."  

For a brief moment, the eyes filled with unshed tears and then Billy 
launched himself into Conrad's arms.  The slender legs wrapped 
themselves around the  waist and the thin arms around his neck.  Conrad 
started to chuckle but his mouth and face was soon smothered in kisses 
and he could barely catch his breath.  Fire ignited in his groin as
the kisses grew passionate instead of grateful.  All thoughts of 
slowing things down quickly fled his fog induced thinking when he felt 
Billy's cock  pulse hard against his own belly and the undulating of the 
thin hips against him.  He heard rushing in his ears as he clasped the 
body hard against him and his own cock thrum with impatience.

For a brief second, sanity returned.  "Billy!" he managed to croak.  
He could imagine gentle Ballard's scowling features if he were to 
come upon them like this.  Billy's savior taking advantage of the 
poor grief stricken boy!  Sleeping together was one thing but
seducing quite another thing indeed.  Conrad doubted he would have 
time to explain to the butler that Billy had practically forced his tongue 
down  Conrad's throat first before angry servants chased him out of the 
house with frying pans and sharp utensils flying after him.  He pushed 
Billy away as the image grew in his mind.  "Billy, no!"

Billy opened his eyes, wide with hurt.  "No, baby, it's not that I 
don't want you.  I just don't want my obituary to read that the famous 
S/M master was killed by a cuisinart."

Billy frowned before realization dawned.  "C'mon, then."  He grabbed
Conrad's hand, both men hard and jutting in their tented pants.  He
hurriedly left the dining room and headed toward the den.  Before Conrad
even had a chance to admire the wonderfully decorated masculine room, Billy
opened a panel that was practically hidden amidst the wood decor and
started down a well lit staircase.  It led to a large room that Conrad
assumed was what the butler called the playroom.  It held an extra large
circular bed that filled the center of the room.  Wardrobes filled two
entire walls with two doors on the wall facing the entrance.  A quick
inspection revealed a bathroom and a fully equipped kitchen in the
adjoining rooms.  He turned to see Billy practically nude already, just
stepping out of his boxers and heading his way, his cock hard and pointing
directly at him.

"Please," he said stopping in front of him, looking at him with 
those liquid eyes.  "Please," he repeated reaching up to unbutton his shirt.

Warring emotions struggled within.   Billy obviously needed this and 
Conrad obviously wanted it.   But were they just letting their cocks rule 
now and regrets were to be dealt with later?  Conrad didn't want Billy 
to feel he was being used and he didn't want to fall in love with Billy 
only to have his feelings not reciprocated.  He  sighed and looked at
the naked man before him, the cock hard and urgent in it's need.  

He bent down to kiss the full lips and the decision was made.  Billy 
had Conrad stripped in record time and he practically climbed up the 
taller body, his mouth hungrily seeking contact.  Conrad groaned as 
the body brushed against and squeezed his blood swollen cock and his 
own frenzy grew.  Billy wrapped his legs around his and Conrad began to
maneuver his way to the bed, mouths never breaking contact.  He 
gently eased them down onto the bed, trying not to crush the thin body 
beneath his.  

"Oh, baby," he managed to gasp out as he came up for air.  Billy 
apparently didn't need any for he latched onto Conrad's neck and 
adam's apple and began to suck.  

"Where's the stuff, Billy?"

An arm detached itself from his hips and pointed to a small bedside 
stand.  Conrad reached out but couldn't quite manage to reach it.   He 
struggled to scoot himself forward but the body beneath him was 
attached like a leech and moved with him.  His cock was squeezed 
deliciously between the two bodies.  He managed to open the
drawer and groaned as the questing tongue and lips found a nipple 
and began to suckle on it.  He fumbled around and prayed that the 
two long time lovers still stocked condoms.  He found the lube and 
much to his relief, a carton of  condoms.  He grabbed the items and 
pulled back.

"In me, in me, in me," Billy chanted it like a mantra, almost 
bouncing in his need.  

"Wait a minute, baby.  Daddy's almost ready." Conrad said the words 
almost without thinking but the momentary shocked look on Billy's face 
quickly  changed from one of need and hunger to rapturous delight
and darkening lust. 

"Daddy's gonna fuck his baby?" Billy motionless now, asked quietly, 
watching as Conrad placed the condom and lube on his leaking cock 
and squirted  more lube into his hand.  

"Daddy's gonna get baby ready first."

Billy just nodded and spread his legs wide.  Conrad's cock jumped at 
the sight of Billy open and ready for him.  He knelt between the spread 
legs and carefully prepared the winking hole.

Within a minute, Billy was writhing, "I need you, Daddy.  I need you 
to fuck me, please fuck me."

"Daddy's coming, baby."  Conrad grabbed the legs and threw them over 
his shoulder and placed his cock at the opening of Billy's body.  He 
carefully pushed in until the head passed the initial muscle.  

Billy arched his back.  "More, Daddy, more."  

Conrad didn't need any more encouragement.  With one swift thrust he 
pushed all the way in until his balls were flat against the white ass and 
felt the tight heat engulfing him.  Oh God, it was incredible.  

"Fuck baby, Daddy." Billy contracted his ass muscles and Conrad 
almost lost control right then.  He leaned down to kiss Billy and began 
to circle his hips in an easy motion. Billy reached down to grab his ass 
and pulled it closer to him and Conrad slipped in even further.  With a 
yell, he straightened and began to fuck Billy like he obviously wanted.  
He pulled out and then slid all the way in again and began to set up a rhythm.
He could feel Billy's body sucking his cock back into young body as 
if it didn't want it to leave.  He reached down to stroke Billy's cock and 
it sprang once again to hardness in a few quick slick motions of his hand.  
Billy wrapped his legs around Conrad's waist and crisscrossed his ankles 
behind him, pulling him once again even closer and then reached up to 
roll the aroused tits.  It prevented Conrad from pulling all the way out but
he made up for it by increasing the frequency and began to pound 
into Billy with a force that caused the young man to grunt loudly with 
every push of his cock.  The grunts increased and Conrad soon lost all 
rhythm and changed angles with every stroke.  It was fast and furious, 
hard and hot, sex and sexy all at the same time.  
                                 
Conrad could feel the orgasm building, his balls drawing up when 
Billy yelled, "Right there, right there, oh, oh, right there, Daddy." 
Billy cried as Conrad began to attack the new spot with renewed fervor. 
Conrad's sweat flew in all directions and Billy's dark hair was wet from 
his exertions.

Billy cried, "I'm coming, Daddy, I'm coming!"  He arched off the 
bed, his arms reaching for Conrad as shudders wracked his body and 
his cock shot it's juice all over his chest. He pulled himself up into 
Conrad's arms and was grabbed and held close to the hairy
chest, with Conrad's cock still deeply imbedded in his ass as he 
straddled the muscular thighs. 

"Shh, baby, Daddy's got you now.  Daddy has you."  Conrad crooned to 
him, his own climax on hold as the tremors still shook Billy.  "Did baby have
a 
good come?" Conrad whispered.

Billy nodded, his face hidden in the hollow of Conrad's neck and 
shoulder.  They sat quietly for a few minutes before Billy stirred.  
"Baby wants to make  it good for Daddy now."  

Billy began to rise up to allow Conrad's cock the much needed 
friction to attain it's own release.  Conrad moaned and began to 
undulate his hips, and began to kiss Billy's open mouth and suck his 
bottom lip.

"Oh baby, you're so good to Daddy.  Feel so good to Daddy. Make 
Daddy come, baby." 

Within minutes, Conrad was close to climaxing once again and Billy 
clung to him as he felt himself incredibly close to another one himself.  
He rubbed his cock against the furred belly, as he rose up and descended 
on the rampant flesh within him.  

"Daddy's coming, baby.  Come with Daddy, baby."  Conrad panted.  
With a grunt he froze and strained as the climax ripped from his body.  
He squeezed the smaller man to him as Billy's own breath shuddered 
as white streams shot between their chests.  Conrad heard his own 
harsh breaths, his thundering heart and Billy's pants against his
ear as he lay his head on Conrad's shoulder.  The smell of sweat, 
arousal and come were almost overpowering but he thought he'd never 
smelled anything so wonderful.  

After a few moments when their breathing slowed, the two men slumped 
together in sated tiredness.  Conrad eased them both down to the bed 
on their  sides with Billy's legs still loosely around his waist, his eyes 
closed and his Daddy's cock still inside him.  Conrad's own eyes closed.  
Just for a moment, he promised himself.  

He woke with a start and was completely disoriented by his strange 
surroundings.  He felt a weight on his body and he looked down to see 
Billy practically sleeping on top of him, his chest making him a 
comfortable pillow.  He quite enjoyed the feeling and reached down to 
stroke the smooth, pale back.  He wrinkled his nose as the ripe smells
of their lovemaking drifted up to him.  He glanced at the bedside 
clock as saw that it was 5:30 am.  His usual waking up time.  He enjoyed 
waking up early  to write, his mind at it's most creative in the quiet
mornings.  
He didn't think any writing was going to get done today.  

He mused on the incredible sex of the night before and hoped Billy wouldn't
regret it. He knew he didn't and by the stirring of his morning erection,
it looked like his body was ready for more.  His bladder made its wishes
known and Conrad began to slide himself out from under Billy.  He felt
something wet and slippery under his butt and found the used condom from
the night before.  He silently cursed as he threw it into the trash can
next to the bed before padding to the bathroom and closing the door.  15
minutes later, refreshed and feeling like a young man, he opened the door
to see Billy stirring.

"Mornin'," Billy mumbled.

"Good morning, baby."  Conrad knelt down and kissed him.  "Did you 
sleep well?"

Billy squinted up at him and a slow grin crept over his face.  "Yes, 
I did.  Thank you." He knelt on the bed and kissed him, his naked body 
causing a primeval stirring of Conrad's cock.  "And thank you for last night."
He paused.  "Thank you for everything, Conrad."

"You're welcome but trust me, Billy, it was no hardship." Conrad 
smiled.  "Well, it was no hardship but if I have to stand downwind of 
you much longer, I'm  afraid...." Conrad let his voice trail off as Billy 
caught his meaning and blushed.  

"Daddy wants baby to take a shower, huh?"

"Daddy wants baby to take a shower, yes!"

The two men walked hand in hand into the dining room twenty minutes later.
If Ballard thought Billy looked much better yesterday, he was doubly
impressed with the smiling, relaxed face of a peaceful young man.  He
glanced at Conrad and could see the affection the man had for Billy.  The
servants had commented on the fact that the master's bed had not been slept
in and it was easy to come to a conclusion.  Although it was still early,
he quickly had a hot breakfast in front of them in record time.

There wasn't much talking except for the occasional mealtime 
comments but the two men sat close together and held hands under 
the table.  Conrad was  pleased to see Billy had more of an appetite 
and didn't need much prompting to continue to eat.

When they were finished, they stood and looked awkwardly at each 
other.  "We need to talk, Billy."  


			      Lost Soul 05/05
			   by Bearkattz@aol.com
______________________________________________________
Thanks once again to everyone's feedback for my last story.   Romance 
ahead, not as much sex as some may like, and role playing of a possible 
offending nature.  Comments, as always, welcome to Bearkattz@aol.com

WARNINGS:  This story depicts loving, consensual sex as well as role 
playing between two adult males of legal age.  If you are offended 
by such or if reading such material is illegal under the local laws, 
or if you are under the age of 18 or under the age of consent in 
your area, please stop reading now.
__________________________________________________________
Billy nodded and a little of the joy left his face.  He led the way 
into the den and waited until Conrad entered before closing the door.  
He sat down in the big leather chair and curled his legs under him as 
Conrad took the couch facing him.  There was a tension in the air and 
Conrad wasn't sure where the change in the atmosphere was coming from.

They started to speak at the same time and then laughed, lessening 
the strained tension of the moment.

"Billy, how are you feeling?"

"About what?  David?  Or you and me?"

"Both, I guess.  I came to help and I want to know if I did."

"Well, I don't feel like I'm drowning in despair any more.  David is 
still dead which is not a good thing but you've shown me that my life 
can still go on.  I know that's what David would want for me."  

Conrad watched the small figure hunched on the chair as if trying to 
hide himself in it. "Then why are you afraid all of a sudden?  At breakfast 
you were fine and now look at you."  He spoke gently easing the truth 
of the words.

"Because you're going to leave me now.  You did what you came for.   
Made sure the heir of David's fortune is not a freaking wreck any more 
and you'll  go back to your own lover."  Billy wouldn't even look at him.  

Conrad was stunned.  Whatever gave Billy that idea?  He carefully 
replayed every word they spoke this morning to see if he had 
inadvertently given any  indication of such an action from him.  
He came up blank.  He watched the huddled figure  and once again,
noticed how he looked like a lost boy, so beautiful, so young, so 
hurt.  Shit!  Of course, Conrad berated himself.  Billy had lost his family 
at a very young age and now his lover. His whole life was a series of 
people leaving him so what else could he expect?  With one swift move, 
he strode over to the chair and knelt down beside it.

"Billy, baby, I told you I wouldn't leave you until you told me to 
and I meant it.  I have no lover to go back to.  I have sex partners, 
people I have sex with and play games, but that's all.  What I feel for 
you is more than that.  I just didn't want to take advantage of
you at this very emotional time right now.  Otherwise I would have 
been telling you how much I..I love you, baby.  From the first time 
I saw you my heart was lost."

Billy looked up, his eyes wide and fixed on Conrad's as he 
continued.  "I don't expect you to reciprocate those feelings of love, 
Billy, but I'm here as long you need me."

Billy's adam's apple bobbed as he tried to swallow the huge lump 
that had formed in his throat.  "But I do love you, Con.  I feel loved 
and cared for and protected for the first time since David died.  
And you know what?  I think he likes it.  I can almost feel him
smiling down on me."  The last words were choked as Billy tried to 
hold back the sobs.

"I thought at first I would feel bad for betraying my love to David 
but it's just the opposite.  I feel good.  You make me feel good, Con.  
I love you."  This time the sobs broke free and Billy launched himself 
into the awaiting and comforting arms of his lover.

Over the next few weeks, Billy's health returned and he was almost back 
to normal.  He gained weight, his skin glowed with his returning strength
and positive mental attitude.  Conrad spent a lot of his time writing on his 
laptop while Billy slept close by.  And Billy was always close by, rarely 
letting Conrad out of his sight.  But what could have been stifling was ...
wonderful.  

As Billy's strength returned, they began to take long walks, 
sometimes talking nonstop and sometimes letting the silence wash 
over them in a peaceful tide as they listened to nature's beauty around 
them.  Evenings were spent on the couch, listening to music or
watching old black and white movies from David's vast collection.  
Billy would sit with his head in Conrad's lap as his hair was petted and 
stroked.  Sometimes, Billy would undo the button's of Conrad's shirt and 
suckle on his tits.  It was his signal that he was ready to play and Conrad 
never lasted long when he tried to ignore the wet sounds coming from 
Billy's mouth on his nipples. Conrad would carry Billy down to the
playroom and the sex was always fantastic.  Billy was practically 
insatiable when it came to sex.  Conrad didn't know whether it was 
from a year long abstinence or if the boy was just usually always horny 
but he certainly wasn't going to complain.

The wardrobes held a large collection of toys and costumes which the 
two lovers had lovingly collected over the years but Billy was always 
happiest when  it was just Daddy and Baby.  It seemed David had been 
the more inventive and imaginative of the two but Billy had always 
been willing to please his lover in anything he wanted to try.

After two months, Conrad finally succombed to Billy's wishes to
move into the mansion on a permanent basis.  They had spent a weekend
apart just to test their feelings for one another and Conrad was never so 
miserable in his life.  He returned to the mansion at the designated 
time the following Monday morning to find Billy waiting for him just 
inside the security gates.  He stopped the car with screeching brakes 
and ran to the slim figure who was holding out his arms for him.  
He lifted Billy off his feet and they began to kiss and nip and suck 
and lick each other until their breathing grew hoarse and
ragged.  Conrad grabbed Billy's hand and drew him into the trees and 
began to literally rip the clothes from his body.  Billy whimpered and 
tore the buttons off Conrad's own shirt as he ripped it open.  
Within seconds they were both naked and they knelt down
to the thick, moss covered ground, their mouths seeking to kiss 
every square inch of each other's body.  

Conrad eased Billy on his back while trying not to lose contact with 
that sweet mouth that he'd missed so much.  His hand strayed south 
and he stroked the hot length of flesh that rose up to meet it.  
The pale legs spread open in invitation and Conrad lost
all pretense of restraint when he probed the tight hole to find it 
lubed and ready for him.  With a shout, he rose quickly and put 
the condom on he was silently handed and in one easy push entered 
the hot depth of Billy's body.  Neither man lasted long as they both
sought only the relief of their own bodies.  It was hard, fast and 
rough.  Conrad pummeled the body beneath him and Billy gripped 
and pulled his own cock in an effort to come quickly.  The only sound 
were gasps and whimpers of need and lust, desire and passion and the 
wet sounds of hot flesh meeting hot flesh.  The sounds of two men
in love, making love.  Conrad froze and shuddered and groaned as the 
orgasm burst from him and with a shout of his own, Billy tightened 
his grip on his own cock as the come shot out of it.  Conrad slumped 
over his lover as his trembling knees gave way and Billy took his 
full weight.  He reveled in the feeling and wound his legs around
Conrad's waist.  

They were silent for almost ten minutes before Billy finally spoke, 
"Don't ever leave me again, Con."

"Never, baby. Never again."

The End
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