Date: Sat, 20 Sep 2008 05:51:30 -0700 (PDT) From: callibrn Subject: understanding my submission part 6 "You are such a good boy, coming to meet me today", Mr Ericsson smiled at me, and I relaxed. I just had to call Mr Ericsson, I needed to see him. I wanted to be near him again. I knew I was going to suck his cock. I could remember now that it was something that happened each time we got together. I knew I needed to suck his cock, to taste his seed as he exploded in my mouth. I was drawn to him and it felt right being here. "You are learning so much about yourself, each time you come here, don't you boy?" "Yes, Sir," I responded. I knew that he was someone I needed to treat respectfully. I couldn't imagine calling him by his first name any longer at all, I wasn't even sure I could remember it at this point. He was just Mr Ericsson when I talked about him to people, or Sir, when I addressed him in person. "You understand better every day, boy. You understand your submission, boy. You need to admit that your role is to submit to men, don't you, boy?" Mr Ericsson asked. His voice rolled around in my head, clearing the cobwebs of daily living and focusing my brain. Focusing on the important things, like Mr Ericsson...and dominant men. "Yes Sir, I know I need to submit to you", I replied, feeling the warmth spread through me as I said the words he wanted to hear. "Yes, boy, to me, but submit to all men too. Everyday you will meet men, and everyday you will submit in some way, boy. Each day you will remember that you are here to serve men, boy. You are becoming more and more naturally submissive, because that is what is best for you, isn't boy?" "Yes Sir, more submissive", I echoed, drifting into a state of complete relaxation. "Good boy, such a good fagboy. Such a good girl. Remembering more about your submission every time we talk, or every time you listen to the CD I give you. Remembering all the times you did what your man wanted, being a good faggot, a good girl... *** Rodney was talking to me. Rodney had died years ago, my first real long term husband. He was telling me things I had not heard in years, just the way he had told me when we were together before he left me. I loved him and wanted everything to be just what he wanted, so he would be happy. "You don't need sex as often as I need sex," he explained. "I am the man in the relationship. A man needs lots of sex. He needs sex with different people and not just one boy. You don't need sex all the time, because you are just like a woman in that regard. They get by with just their one man when he wants to give it to them, or with someone else if he wants to give someone else that chance with his woman. From now on you'll only cum when I want you to cum. You can hold it for me until I am ready." I remembered not liking that, but he was so much better to me than Robert had been in the end. I could wait if he wanted because he loved me, and I wanted to make him happy. It had been awhile since Rodney had fucked me and I had not been with anyone else since we met. He was always going off to the bathhouse and I was always staying home and cleaning, cooking and taking care of his car and stuff. The first couple years wasn't a problem, but then we stopped having sex as much and now it had been six months. "I want you to be at home for when I am here, and so that is what you will be doing," he added. "You can have sex when I am ready for you to have sex. A fag takes care of his man and doesn't complain." Rodney was right, I was the "girl" in the relationship. I did what he said. I cooked and cleaned and managed the house and he did what he wanted. Cooking if he wanted, never cleaning of course, and going to the bath houses. He would fuck me when he wanted to but it had been such a long time. Rodney just said he was saving me up for a good time. "I don't want you cumming for anyone else but me. You keep your hands off your little dick and just leave it to me." It was tough at first but after awhile I found it wasn't so bad. Not nearly as bad as the first couple weeks when I wanted something all the time. Now I just kinda felt it was normal to not cum, but to be ready if he wanted me to cum. Some days I thought I might get to cum, but other times weeks would go by and nothing would happen. I just tried not thinking about it and being good, so maybe he would take an interest in me again. "Now make sure the house is clean for the party this weekend," he added as he left for the baths. I cleaned and got food ready for the party. When that weekend came I was enjoying seeing our friends. It was nice to have some folks over to the place. I had a couple of drinks in me and was relaxed. A friend of our other housemate came up to me. His name was Todd and I always thought he was cute. Tall, with nice defined muscles. He had a ruddy complexion and freckles over his face and arms. "Hey, Steve, nice party," he said as he pulled me over to a corner away from the main crowd in the living room. "Thanks Todd," I smiled knowing the work had been worth it to hear this from him. Todd lowered his voice as we got to the corner. "I hear that you haven't been fucked in awhile. Rodney says you need a good fuck tonight." I know my face must have turned red, because Todd smiled. I was shocked that Rodney had said something like that to him, I hardly knew him. I just stood there unable to think what to say to his words. "Looks like he was right," Todd's grinning face became a lear. "Why don't we go upstairs later when it quiets down." He took my hand and placed it on his crotch so I could feel his very hard and big cock. "Rodney said I could make use of your ass later. He seemed to be happy to pimp you out tonight." Todd laughged and wandered off after he saw I couldn't say anything, but just stood there blushing. Rodney was passing by and he stopped. "I expect you to go put out for Todd tonight. You keep saying you need to get fucked and I am tired of hearing about it. So I decided that you can make our guests happy in other ways besides pouring drinks. I know deep inside, you like the idea of being the faggot whore, so I expect to hear you do it well." With that he left to go back to talking to people. I just stood there for awhile... I wasn't a faggot whore. I was a guy like any other guy. Sure I was gay, but I wasn't some piece of trash off the street. No one would treat me bad again, I thought to myself. I wanted Rodney to be my man, not Todd. I replayed what he said to me and it did get me worked up, but I was confused. I wanted to make Rodney happy, not Todd, but Rodney had said making Todd happy was what he wanted. Todd placed his hand on my back and directed me to the stairs. He wanted me to go upstairs with him. The house had emptied out some and those that were left were all feeling no pain, chatting loudly and having a good time. Todd whispered in my ear, "no one will miss us for awhile, let's go." I was hesitant, it had been so long and I wanted to have sex, but I wanted it known it was because I wanted it not because Rodney told him to do it, or because I was doing it because Rodney told me to do it. But then Todd stopped at the bottom of the stairs. He took hold of my head with his hand and moved in toward me. He kissed me and pried open my mouth with his tongue. He held my head tightly to his and moved his other hand around to my ass and began kneading it with his fingers. I sighed audibly as he expertly relaxed me. I had to grab on to him with my hands I felt so light headed. He pulled his face back from mine, smiled, and said, "This should be fun. You do need that hole filled." I blushed, I could feel the heat as he looked at me. He led me upstairs, and knew which room was ours. He sat me on the bed and undressed me. He turned me over and went right to my hole with his lips and began eating me out. Talking as he did it. "Such a nice pussy. Sure was nice of your man to loan it out to me for the evening." His tongue explored my ass and I was moaning before long at how his tongue flicked in and out of my hole, making me squirm. "Looks like it HAS been awhile. He said you were a good boy and didn't mess around unless he allowed it." I thought about that for a few seconds. Rodney didn't tell me what to do. I did it because I wanted to be with him. I was just me, it was my choice. I wasn't being a "good boy" for him, but I was doing what I wanted for me. Todd stood up. He was still fully clothed but I could see his cock, hard already in his pants. I knew what I wanted. I got off the bed and on my knees in front of him. I pulled his pants down and his boxers off and his cock sprang up in front of me. I took his cockhead into my mouth and rolled my tongue around it. Todd moaned and placed his hand on the back of my head, not letting my mouth off his dick. "You are a good cocksucker. You know just what feels good. Bet no one had to teach you that either," he mumbled his eyes shut. He was looking toward the ceiling his head thrown back, so I knew I was doing it well. I wanted to feel him inside me, it had been a long time, and his tongue had gotten me worked up in more than one way. He seemed so familiar with me, but I didn't know him that well. "Keep sucking," Todd's voice caught me off guard. I guess I had stopped while I was thinking. "I didn't say to stop." His hand pulled at my head until I was all the way down on his cock, when he pulled it back it was covered in saliva thick from deep in my throat. "That is nice, get it wet because that is all I am using to lube you with when I fuck you. Your pussy is wet enough, you won't need anything else besides your own saliva." Todd shoved his cock way into the back of my throat and held it there, moving it back and forth just a little never leaving me room to breathe, holding the back of my head as he stretched my lips as far as they would open. When he finally pulled back, I gasped for air and pulled away from him. He almost made me pass out, I thought. But Todd didn't like that. He pulled me up off my knees and pushed down onto the bed. "Don't fight me, unless you want it that way. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked." He towered over me and I was a little afraid of him, he was definitely not happy. He reached down and grabbed my legs. He roughly pushed them over my head exposing my hole again. He lined up his cock and shoved it into me. I let out a yelp. "Owwww, that hurt, you didn't use any lube," I whined a little. "Didn't need any," Todd grinned as he told me. "Your hole was wet already, you just needed a dick in it, stop whining, I already know you wanted it." He had paused long enough to at least let me adjust to his invasion. But then he began to fuck me quite hard. Each thrust was countered with a long pull back until he was almost out of my hole, then he would shove it back all the way. He was knocking my prostate with every thrust, making my dick leak onto my stomach. Even though he used no lube after a few strokes it made no difference it seemed. His cock felt so good inside me. I started squeezing on his dick with my ass muscles each time he pulled back, and releasing them each time he thrust in. "Yeah, bitch, that it is nice, your pussy grabs my dick like you don't want it out of there." He laughed as he kept fucking me. "You are such a bitch bottom, Rodney has a good thing here." Todd kept extending his strokes and before I knew it he was pulling all the way out of my hole then shoving all the way back in. It was driving me crazy. I could hear myself moaning, it felt so good to get fucked after so long. "I love fucking boys like you, nothing but a hole to get off in, never say no cause you know it is good for you." He grinned down at me as he pulled out then slapped my hole with his cock before plunging back in again to the hilt. "See you didn't need any lube, your hole is wet and ready for cock. It's only gonna get juicier cause I'm gonna fill it up with my load." That nearly drove me crazy thinking about Todd coming in me. I know I was blushing from his words that stung, but I was moaning and really getting into his fucking. He was being rough but I wanted to feel him empty himself inside me. He was dripping sweat on me and fucking hard and then he stopped all of a sudden and pulled out. "Where do you want it bitch?" he growled. "Please fill my hole," I begged. Todd just laughed. "You ARE a bitch, no wonder Rodney keeps you on a tight leash. Get ready then whore, You're gonna take it all inside you" Todd just went to town on my ass, pounding with a lot of force and really making me feel his power as he kept slamming my ass. His balls were slapping hard against me. Then I could sense him tensing. His eyes shut and he drove into me one final time and then just ground his cock as deep as he could get it, literally screwing me with his motions. "Fuck, take me, bitch, you need this more than I do. Take all of my seed." When Todd had finished he rolled me over so that I was sitting on him and he was laying on the edge of the bed. He was holding me and it felt good to be held, but he was holding me tight still and I thought he would relax and loosen his grip. Then I felt something else at my hole. I tried to turn around but Todd held my head. "Don't squirm, boy. You wanted to get fucked and now you are gonna get it from me and your boyfriend, at the same time. The more you fight the more it will hurt." The pressure was intense. Rodney was lining up his cock right against my hole and where Todd's hard cock was still inside me. I didn't think I could take two at once, it had never happened before. Rodney started laughing behind me. "He sure is squirming. I thought he wanted his hole fucked." "You were right about him though, Rodney, he was a real whore for my cock once I got going. He was begging and moaning. Got all whiny when I pulled out for a few seconds. He needs to remember that his pussy is for our fun, not his." They were talking about me like I wasn't there or like I wasn't part of this scene. I could feel my face turning all red. "Please don't do this, what if I can't take it," I cried, hearing the fear in my own voice. "No choice tonight, boy," Rodney said. I was nice enough to get you a man to show you a good time now you need to show me one too." He slowly began inserting his rigid dick in my already filled hole. I was whimpering, the pain was intense. Rodney was slapping my ass, telling me that I was a pussy, as he kept the pressure on and my hole was stretched in new ways. Suddenly just as I thought I would rip in two, his dick slipped right inside me, and he began fucking me as Todd held me still. "Fuck that is as tight as I have felt his pussy ever," Rodney commented. I should have done this earlier." "He makes a good cockwhore," Todd added as he too began moving inside me again. I could hardly stand the pain it was so bad. I realized I was crying from the pain, but it did nothing to slow down their fucking which was picking up speed. "Good thing you lubed the hole with your load," Rodney laughed. "Otherwise it might have hurt her." Todd seemed to think that was funny too, as he laughed. I had been pimped out by my boyfriend and now he was using me for fun along with the guy he had set me up with. I felt so embarrassed and so used by both of them. They were laughing and enjoying it and I was caught in the middle. Both Todd and Rodney began concentrating on fucking. I could hear them grunting. Rodney held my shoulders hard and was fucking from above. Todd was holding onto my hips and fucking from below. "Damn, this feels even better than I thought it would," Rodney said. "I can feel your cock up there rubbing on mine as I fuck her." "Fuck, yeah, this is nice," Todd added. "Your cock rubbing one side of my dick and her pussy wrapped on the rest of it." I could hear slapping noises and feel Todd's load from earlier leaking out of my hole. Then I heard myself moan and realized I was no longer crying but it was feeling good. I was embarrassed to have Rodney calling me a girl, a bitch in front of Todd, but Todd had been doing that to me too, so any protest from me would just fall on deaf ears. "Hahahahahahaha," Rodney was laughing, "The bitch decided she likes it too. I knew your hole would have no troubles. You have always been a bottom bitch and I knew I could do this to you, and you would like it." Todd was grinning up at me and I was beginning to push back now as their strokes increased in speed. It was feeling good, but I kept thinking that it wasn't supposed to be like this. I wasn't supposed to be enjoying getting used like this. I was a guy, not a bitch. Why did they refer to me as "her" and treat me as if I were something less than a man. But I was moaning from the fullness and the bumping going on inside me. Suddenly I could no longer hold myself back. My cock erupted spraying my load all over Todd's hairy chest. I clamped down hard on two cocks inside me and it drove both Todd and Rodney crazy. "Shit, I am gonna cum too," Rodney shouted first. I felt his cock throb and he groaned as he emptied his load. "Oh fuck, that is hot," Todd said, "I can feel your load spewing on my cock, I am blowing NOW." He too cried out as he forced deep in me and began unloading himself a second time. When they had climbed off me, Rodney took some of the cum leaking from my well abused hole and fed it to me. I was too exhausted to protest, and they both laughed at me as I lay there on the bed. I felt completely used, completely happy, and completely confused about how I had been tricked and pimped, but I had enjoyed it all. *** Then Mr Ericsson was there, back again in my dream, telling me I was a good boy, a good bitch. "Such a good bitch. Taking all that cock. You needed that after your celibacy. You were so good to not get fucked for six months, being a good boy not cumming at all, following orders. You know you were a good boy. You are a good cocksucker, a good bitch. You know you were doing what was right. You needed to behave, to follow orders. You were there for your man, doing what he wanted to do with you, boy. You are such a good faggot, boy." Mr Ericsson was filling my mouth with his cock as in all my memories and dreams lately. His thick cock was getting harder as he held my head and he pumped me full of his seed. "Such a good bitchboy, taking cock like this. You know you need my load. You know you want my load. The more of my load I feed you the more you need boy. Such a good boy" I looked up at him and smiled and nodded as best I could with my mouth full and cum running down my chin. "Clean that load up, boy. You know you need it in you, don't you?" "Yes Sir, Mr Ericsson," I replied immediately. I did know that I wanted his load and loved to receive it. "Listen boy, listen to my voice. Listen as I talk to you, and tell you what a good boy you are, what a good cocksucker you are." Mr Ericsson spoke soothingly at all times. His voice was so relaxed and mellow. "You have always done what a man tells you to do, boy. That is so good. You are such a good boy. Always doing what your man tells you to do." I felt warm again hearing his words. It was making so much sense what he told me. "Yes Mr Ericsson" I replied. "It isn't important if you cum or not, boy. You know that now. You know that you will cum when your man allows it or if you are being fucked properly and being used like a good boy should be. Your pleasure comes from serving your man, boy. You are such a good boy, such a good bitch, a good girl. You know now that you belong to your man, boy. You belong to him and you do what he tells you. This is how it is, boy. It is natural for you to obey, just like you always have, only now you understand it, and you accept that as proper and good for you, faggot. Such a good girl. You want to obey, you love obeying your man. You know you were born this way, raised this way, and taught this way. You can not fight what is natural for you, boy. Some boys are just that way. A faggot is submissive, boy. A faggot is made to follow orders, you are such a good faggot, such a good boy. You want to be a good boy because it feels best, it is natural for you because you know it feels best that way. Such a good girl. Best to be submissive, to do what your man wants..."